Continued: Getting rid of stuff / Clearing out clutter! PART 2

[SunnyDays]

A bit of a win in my months-long juggernaut of decluttering (and actually removing everything from) my mom's apt, since she is moving to assisted living.

The price to remove a big piece of furniture is $150.  I sold this particular piece for $100. Massive win !  I get a one hundred dollar bill snug in my wallet, and I cheat the junk man out of his $150. I love it. $250 net benefit. 

I still have 2 more big pieces that have to go, but my deadline is coming up, and my nerves are shot,  so I'm gonna give the junker $300 to take them away.   It has to end sometime.       

Why not advertise "free for the taking?"  Might save yourself $300.

[middo]

A bit of a win in my months-long juggernaut of decluttering (and actually removing everything from) my mom's apt, since she is moving to assisted living.

The price to remove a big piece of furniture is $150.  I sold this particular piece for $100. Massive win !  I get a one hundred dollar bill snug in my wallet, and I cheat the junk man out of his $150. I love it. $250 net benefit. 

I still have 2 more big pieces that have to go, but my deadline is coming up, and my nerves are shot,  so I'm gonna give the junker $300 to take them away.   It has to end sometime.       

Why not advertise "free for the taking?"  Might save yourself $300.

Past experience tends to say put a price of $50 on something and people will turn up and haggle.  Put it up for free and they just don't turn up.

[Monocle Money Mouth]

A bit of a win in my months-long juggernaut of decluttering (and actually removing everything from) my mom's apt, since she is moving to assisted living.

The price to remove a big piece of furniture is $150.  I sold this particular piece for $100. Massive win !  I get a one hundred dollar bill snug in my wallet, and I cheat the junk man out of his $150. I love it. $250 net benefit. 

I still have 2 more big pieces that have to go, but my deadline is coming up, and my nerves are shot,  so I'm gonna give the junker $300 to take them away.   It has to end sometime.       

Why not advertise "free for the taking?"  Might save yourself $300.

Past experience tends to say put a price of $50 on something and people will turn up and haggle.  Put it up for free and they just don't turn up.

I've also found this to be true. I've had people no call/no show several times when giving away stuff. It rarely happens when I sell stuff.

[Monocle Money Mouth]

I finally sold a guitar I had up for sale for almost 4 years. It's been collecting dust in my closet since 2015 or so. One less thing to move around, clean, and maintain and a few hundred extra bucks to invest.

I wish 2011 Monocle Money Mouth had been interested in investing. I could have turned the $800 I spent on the guitar into $3,000 instead of $325. Hindsight is 20/20.

[PMG]

A bit of a win in my months-long juggernaut of decluttering (and actually removing everything from) my mom's apt, since she is moving to assisted living.

The price to remove a big piece of furniture is $150.  I sold this particular piece for $100. Massive win !  I get a one hundred dollar bill snug in my wallet, and I cheat the junk man out of his $150. I love it. $250 net benefit. 

I still have 2 more big pieces that have to go, but my deadline is coming up, and my nerves are shot,  so I'm gonna give the junker $300 to take them away.   It has to end sometime.       

Why not advertise "free for the taking?"  Might save yourself $300.

Past experience tends to say put a price of $50 on something and people will turn up and haggle.  Put it up for free and they just don't turn up.

I've also found this to be true. I've had people no call/no show several times when giving away stuff. It rarely happens when I sell stuff.

In some neighborhoods free by the curb is very effective especially with a curb alert listing on marketplace.

[slackmax]

A bit of a win in my months-long juggernaut of decluttering (and actually removing everything from) my mom's apt, since she is moving to assisted living.

The price to remove a big piece of furniture is $150.  I sold this particular piece for $100. Massive win !  I get a one hundred dollar bill snug in my wallet, and I cheat the junk man out of his $150. I love it. $250 net benefit. 

I still have 2 more big pieces that have to go, but my deadline is coming up, and my nerves are shot,  so I'm gonna give the junker $300 to take them away.   It has to end sometime.       

Why not advertise "free for the taking?"  Might save yourself $300.

I actually have them listed on FB for free, and also a local buy nothing site.  Spent hours looking for a Goodwill or Salvation Army to pick them up. And other websites that say they take furniture donations. Dead ends everywhere. Very frustrating. Habitat for Humanity will take furniture, but you have to have it out on the curb for them. They will not come in. These are huge and heavy sofas. The CCRC she is in prohibits me from paying an employee here to get them to the curb.

Just on and on and on, reasons why I can't get rid of it.

I got some inquiries on Facebook for free, but no one wants to come get it. They want me to deliver it.



 

[SunnyDays]

A bit of a win in my months-long juggernaut of decluttering (and actually removing everything from) my mom's apt, since she is moving to assisted living.

The price to remove a big piece of furniture is $150.  I sold this particular piece for $100. Massive win !  I get a one hundred dollar bill snug in my wallet, and I cheat the junk man out of his $150. I love it. $250 net benefit. 

I still have 2 more big pieces that have to go, but my deadline is coming up, and my nerves are shot,  so I'm gonna give the junker $300 to take them away.   It has to end sometime.       

Why not advertise "free for the taking?"  Might save yourself $300.

I actually have them listed on FB for free, and also a local buy nothing site.  Spent hours looking for a Goodwill or Salvation Army to pick them up. And other websites that say they take furniture donations. Dead ends everywhere. Very frustrating. Habitat for Humanity will take furniture, but you have to have it out on the curb for them. They will not come in. These are huge and heavy sofas. The CCRC she is in prohibits me from paying an employee here to get them to the curb.

Just on and on and on, reasons why I can't get rid of it.

I got some inquiries on Facebook for free, but no one wants to come get it. They want me to deliver it.



 

I guess this speaks to the enormous glut of used items out there.  Sad that the world has come to this. Another reason to not buy more than absolutely necessary.

[happy]

I actually have them listed on FB for free, and also a local buy nothing site.  Spent hours looking for a Goodwill or Salvation Army to pick them up. And other websites that say they take furniture donations. Dead ends everywhere. Very frustrating. Habitat for Humanity will take furniture, but you have to have it out on the curb for them. They will not come in. These are huge and heavy sofas. The CCRC she is in prohibits me from paying an employee here to get them to the curb.

Just on and on and on, reasons why I can't get rid of it.

I got some inquiries on Facebook for free, but no one wants to come get it. They want me to deliver it.

I ran across exactly the same problem when I was trying to get rid of furniture from my deceased parent's house. We were on a time-line and I moved a whole lot of things to my place as I was not familiar with the charities etc near my parent's house. I thought I knew how to dispose of them locally, but like you I got endless dead ends. It was both unexpected and frustrating.

[Fresh Bread]

A bit of a win in my months-long juggernaut of decluttering (and actually removing everything from) my mom's apt, since she is moving to assisted living.

The price to remove a big piece of furniture is $150.  I sold this particular piece for $100. Massive win !  I get a one hundred dollar bill snug in my wallet, and I cheat the junk man out of his $150. I love it. $250 net benefit. 

I still have 2 more big pieces that have to go, but my deadline is coming up, and my nerves are shot,  so I'm gonna give the junker $300 to take them away.   It has to end sometime.       

Why not advertise "free for the taking?"  Might save yourself $300.

I actually have them listed on FB for free, and also a local buy nothing site.  Spent hours looking for a Goodwill or Salvation Army to pick them up. And other websites that say they take furniture donations. Dead ends everywhere. Very frustrating. Habitat for Humanity will take furniture, but you have to have it out on the curb for them. They will not come in. These are huge and heavy sofas. The CCRC she is in prohibits me from paying an employee here to get them to the curb.

Just on and on and on, reasons why I can't get rid of it.

I got some inquiries on Facebook for free, but no one wants to come get it. They want me to deliver it.



 

I guess this speaks to the enormous glut of used items out there.  Sad that the world has come to this. Another reason to not buy more than absolutely necessary.

I can understand it for large, difficult to move items, although it's frustrating. When you can have an incredibly cheap new sofa delivered to your lounge room, why would you deal with the hassle of finding and collecting a second-hand one that might have bed bugs or fleas. Hiring a ute or van or a "man with a van" costs way more than a delivery charge from a store (and often that's free).

The other difficult items are large bits of furniture that have become obsolete, even if they are nice solid wood. Like huge tv units, since a lot of people mount TVs on the wall now and don't have videos & DVDs and DVD players to store with the TV. CD holders are also destined for the tip!

I did manage to sell a leather sofa from a well known brand that still stocked something similar. I did some styled photos like from a catalogue & priced it really high. I've bought a second hand leather chair before because it was a high end fake designer one. Sometimes I think that the reason IKEA stuff is easy to move on is because people recognise and know what it is. 

The only way I'd get rid of our current sofa (from a cheap online store, but only because it was hard to find one small enough for the space!) is to offer it for free with delivery. 

[mspym]

Even more things put out on the curb and picked up by strangers. The stream is never ending. We're also at the throw out the half-used things stage. We are also eating some very odd meals to use things up.

[Fresh Bread]

Even more things put out on the curb and picked up by strangers. The stream is never ending. We're also at the throw out the half-used things stage. We are also eating some very odd meals to use things up.

I love the baked beans on pasta with a side of frozen spinach stage. Your stories make me want to move countries!

[RetiredAt63]

Even more things put out on the curb and picked up by strangers. The stream is never ending. We're also at the throw out the half-used things stage. We are also eating some very odd meals to use things up.

I love the baked beans on pasta with a side of frozen spinach stage. Your stories make me want to move countries!

Australia is a big country, just move to someplace that will mean a 4 day move, and look at the estimate.  That will be lots of incentive.

[Josiecat22222]

"Baked beans on pasta with a side of frozen spinach" is such a perfect descriptor of the moving and eating down the pantry!!! I laughed out loud at that!

[slackmax]

After 4 moves I keep thinking I've thrown out everything that needs throwing out.  Nope.

I just threw out my old ironing board.  I had to really force it to open, and I stopped part way, because if it was that hard to open I figured I would never get it closed again.  I guess all the jostling in the various moving vans didn't do it any good.  I've replaced it with a flat ironing pad for use on the kitchen peninsula.  It is more than adequate for the small amount of ironing I do.

I just donated an old ironing board. I also had furniture in my car, and as I was pulling into the Salvation Army place, someone ran out saying "No furniture!" He said people were sneaking in furniture, and they had to have someone monitor things. He accepted the ironing board.   

[tygertygertyger]

A family member works as a manager at Goodwill. He said early in the pandemic they had massive piles of furniture and other donations, just enormous amounts. People had nothing but time on their hands so were doing big cleanouts of their houses. The stores had to rent extra dumpsters and pay a lot to haul the extra garbage away. Thus they all changed their policy.  I can imagine dead-of-the-night dropoffs!

[draco44]

A family member works as a manager at Goodwill. He said early in the pandemic they had massive piles of furniture and other donations, just enormous amounts. People had nothing but time on their hands so were doing big cleanouts of their houses. The stores had to rent extra dumpsters and pay a lot to haul the extra garbage away. Thus they all changed their policy.  I can imagine dead-of-the-night dropoffs!

That's interesting that the policy seems to still be in place in at least some locations. It's amazing how much stuff has already been manufactured in the world.

[slackmax]

Put the first few items of the stuff I had to take in from Mom's place,  on Facebook  Marketplace.  Took a long time photographing, deciding how to describe stuff, pricing. Actually, quite time consuming.

Will donate once I get tired of waiting for a buyer.

Will keep some of the nice wood furniture she had, though. A nice real marble top square end table , even if it's in the middle of real clutter, still jazzes the place up, somehow, lol.   Will be keeping that.

[midweststache]

1. DH and KID1 are taking a not inexpensive trip to Philadelphia to see family, but they're also taking a whole bag of hand-me-downs for the kids' newest cousin, so that's another bag out of the house!

2. Returning a shirt that didn't fit KID1 (who's growing like a WEED) today.

3. With DH and KID1 gone for a trip this weekend, I plan to take full advantage and clean the holy heck out of the house, which will definitely result in using up a bunch of miscellaneous cleaning supplies. KID2 and I are also going to eat down the fridge/freezer/pantry.

4. If we're feeling cute, KID2 and I might take some books to the LFL across the street before school starts and make sure it's robust for the new school year and then head to the library to check out some new books that won't live on our bookshelf.

[halftimer]

I have had lots of decluttering practice lately. Got rid of big and small items before our move across town, and got rid of more after the move. Then a few weeks later overseas family came and started sorting through their boxes that have been in storage for 10 years (not at my place, thankfully!) and I helped them sort, dispose, stage for sale, and rehome some of it. They have made really good progress on that now that they know they will not be living here again any time soon.
Now, my office is moving. It is just within the building, but everything needs to be touched and boxed and lifted and arranged in the new space - so I was able to find 10 boxes worth of shredding and a few shelves of items that do not need to come with us.

[BeanCounter]

I joined this thread 3, maybe 4 years ago after my
Mom died and I brought many things from her house into my home. But I kept putting off making decisions about selling or donating items. It’s really hard! All these things have been stacked up in the unfinished side of my basement waiting for me to make decisions. Yesterday I finally started to make some progress. I took three carloads of stuff to thrift stores. I still have a long way to go. What I find so difficult is that everything I’m giving away still has value. They are nice things. Furniture, lamps, accessories and barely used toys that my children have out grown. I could sell them but that takes so much effort for very little return so I feel donating is probably the best option. When I take these things to the thrift store drop off I get this huge rush of anxiety when I see the piles and piles of stuff that is left by people. Much of it is probably worthless even second hand. It makes me feel so guilty about what we are doing to the planet with all of this stuff. I also feel bad when getting rid of these very gently used toys that were gifted to my children by relatives and just never got played with.
It all just makes me feel awful. Any advice?
Thanks for reading. I just need some support as I move the rest of the storage room along. The goal is to be able to put up a ping pong table for my boys.

[RetiredAt63]

I joined this thread 3, maybe 4 years ago after my
Mom died and I brought many things from her house into my home. But I kept putting off making decisions about selling or donating items. It’s really hard! All these things have been stacked up in the unfinished side of my basement waiting for me to make decisions. Yesterday I finally started to make some progress. I took three carloads of stuff to thrift stores. I still have a long way to go. What I find so difficult is that everything I’m giving away still has value. They are nice things. Furniture, lamps, accessories and barely used toys that my children have out grown. I could sell them but that takes so much effort for very little return so I feel donating is probably the best option. When I take these things to the thrift store drop off I get this huge rush of anxiety when I see the piles and piles of stuff that is left by people. Much of it is probably worthless even second hand. It makes me feel so guilty about what we are doing to the planet with all of this stuff. I also feel bad when getting rid of these very gently used toys that were gifted to my children by relatives and just never got played with.
It all just makes me feel awful. Any advice?
Thanks for reading. I just need some support as I move the rest of the storage room along. The goal is to be able to put up a ping pong table for my boys.

I know that feeling - I had a yard sale once because it was all good stuff and I wanted to recoup a bit of money.  It was a horrible experience, so much work for so little return.

So for all my moves I have just donated. 

Left on the roadside donated.  Taken to thrift store donated.  Donated to a dog rescue that runs a permanent yard sale.  Donated big stuff to a place that sets up refugees and people who have had fires (that one got me a tax receipt).  If your things are still good quality someone will appreciate them.

[rivendale]

My grandmother passed away last fall and her house is finally in the process of being sold. 50+ years of life at a single address. She wasn't a hoarder by any means, but with that long of a timeframe, stuff accumulates. Yesterday we went to help empty the house and left with a pickup bed full of things for "donation." The executor has some hoarding tendencies so we just said yes to anything that would fit. About half of it was just old household items in various states of disrepair. Those bags were dropped off at a dumpster (we have access) on our way to a local thrift store.  The rest were gently used clothing items that will hopefully find a second life.

[SunnyDays]

I joined this thread 3, maybe 4 years ago after my
Mom died and I brought many things from her house into my home. But I kept putting off making decisions about selling or donating items. It’s really hard! All these things have been stacked up in the unfinished side of my basement waiting for me to make decisions. Yesterday I finally started to make some progress. I took three carloads of stuff to thrift stores. I still have a long way to go. What I find so difficult is that everything I’m giving away still has value. They are nice things. Furniture, lamps, accessories and barely used toys that my children have out grown. I could sell them but that takes so much effort for very little return so I feel donating is probably the best option. When I take these things to the thrift store drop off I get this huge rush of anxiety when I see the piles and piles of stuff that is left by people. Much of it is probably worthless even second hand. It makes me feel so guilty about what we are doing to the planet with all of this stuff. I also feel bad when getting rid of these very gently used toys that were gifted to my children by relatives and just never got played with.
It all just makes me feel awful. Any advice?
Thanks for reading. I just need some support as I move the rest of the storage room along. The goal is to be able to put up a ping pong table for my boys.

I get it.  So much waste!  We rape the planet to make things, then get rid of perfectly good stuff so we can rape the planet again to make newer/"better"/fancier stuff.  We're all guilty of it, no matter how hard we try.  And the irony of it is that older things are generally of superior quality and made to last generations, but they're no longer in style so we get rid of them in exchange for flimsy things that break in a matter of days, weeks or years.  Every time the cycle repeats itself, everything becomes poorer quality.

The best we can do is to stop buying things we don't need, keep the old, good stuff and donate the rest to people who will at least use the items instead of buying new.  But I agree, it's really depressing.

[Josiecat22222]

Buy nothing group give aways:
Weighted blanket
4 school 3 ring binders
Scrub caps
A flavor of tea that I just didn't care for

Happy to see these items go to good homes!!

[mspym]

@BeanCounter in your situation, rather than sending it to a charity shop, I’d contact a refugee organisation or similar for people trying to set up a household. More likely to get taken and used.

[Dee_the_third]

I joined this thread 3, maybe 4 years ago after my
Mom died and I brought many things from her house into my home. But I kept putting off making decisions about selling or donating items. It’s really hard! All these things have been stacked up in the unfinished side of my basement waiting for me to make decisions. Yesterday I finally started to make some progress. I took three carloads of stuff to thrift stores. I still have a long way to go. What I find so difficult is that everything I’m giving away still has value. They are nice things. Furniture, lamps, accessories and barely used toys that my children have out grown. I could sell them but that takes so much effort for very little return so I feel donating is probably the best option. When I take these things to the thrift store drop off I get this huge rush of anxiety when I see the piles and piles of stuff that is left by people. Much of it is probably worthless even second hand. It makes me feel so guilty about what we are doing to the planet with all of this stuff. I also feel bad when getting rid of these very gently used toys that were gifted to my children by relatives and just never got played with.
It all just makes me feel awful. Any advice?
Thanks for reading. I just need some support as I move the rest of the storage room along. The goal is to be able to put up a ping pong table for my boys.

These are absolutely valid feelings, and I struggle with them too. One thing that helps me is knowing that these items have utility, and I am releasing them so someone else can appreciate the life they have left. I don’t need three bathroom mats, even though they’re all perfectly good. And somewhere out there is a single parent who had to leave an abusive household and is starting from scratch in their one bedroom apartment and could really use a bath mat (okay, that’s excessively dramatic, but you get the drift). This bath mat can only be appreciated by someone else if I can get myself to give it away. I think I might have gotten that idea from Marie Kondo.

[MayDay]

I joined this thread 3, maybe 4 years ago after my
Mom died and I brought many things from her house into my home. But I kept putting off making decisions about selling or donating items. It’s really hard! All these things have been stacked up in the unfinished side of my basement waiting for me to make decisions. Yesterday I finally started to make some progress. I took three carloads of stuff to thrift stores. I still have a long way to go. What I find so difficult is that everything I’m giving away still has value. They are nice things. Furniture, lamps, accessories and barely used toys that my children have out grown. I could sell them but that takes so much effort for very little return so I feel donating is probably the best option. When I take these things to the thrift store drop off I get this huge rush of anxiety when I see the piles and piles of stuff that is left by people. Much of it is probably worthless even second hand. It makes me feel so guilty about what we are doing to the planet with all of this stuff. I also feel bad when getting rid of these very gently used toys that were gifted to my children by relatives and just never got played with.
It all just makes me feel awful. Any advice?
Thanks for reading. I just need some support as I move the rest of the storage room along. The goal is to be able to put up a ping pong table for my boys.

A good thrift store makes a huge difference. There is one by my house that does indeed look as you described. But as a resident of the neighborhood, I have also seen them post a few times on the neighborhood Facebook group about how their back staging area is completely empty and please bring donations by so they can keep the store stocked! I think it's just constant processing so you see a mess of junk but in one day all that gets processed through and onto the shop floor.

I've seen similar at a food bank that has clothes available. They had an absolute mountain of clothes that i saw in the back while volunteering and said they have a group of ladies who come in a few mornings a week and get the whole mountain sorted and put into the shop area.

[jeninco]

We're still clearing stuff our in preparation for a (hopefully) remodel.
I sent an entire set of revere wear pots, and quite a few nice pans off with DS2, to furnish the kitchen of his rental apartment.
I cleaned out some glassware (when's the last time we had root beer floats? Do we need special mugs for that? 8 of them?), an old crockpot, and various other kitchen odds and ends.

I tried to re-organize the pantry, but actually sort of made a mess, so I'm trying to eat down the things we use less frequently so I can have more space for the stuff we do.

Also took DS's bed and desk to his new place, so at least they're out of OUR house.

[happy]

I joined this thread 3, maybe 4 years ago after my
Mom died and I brought many things from her house into my home. But I kept putting off making decisions about selling or donating items. It’s really hard! All these things have been stacked up in the unfinished side of my basement waiting for me to make decisions. Yesterday I finally started to make some progress. I took three carloads of stuff to thrift stores. I still have a long way to go. What I find so difficult is that everything I’m giving away still has value. They are nice things. Furniture, lamps, accessories and barely used toys that my children have out grown. I could sell them but that takes so much effort for very little return so I feel donating is probably the best option. When I take these things to the thrift store drop off I get this huge rush of anxiety when I see the piles and piles of stuff that is left by people. Much of it is probably worthless even second hand. It makes me feel so guilty about what we are doing to the planet with all of this stuff. I also feel bad when getting rid of these very gently used toys that were gifted to my children by relatives and just never got played with.
It all just makes me feel awful. Any advice?
Thanks for reading. I just need some support as I move the rest of the storage room along. The goal is to be able to put up a ping pong table for my boys.

Just echoing the comments of others...its happened/happening to me too. My parents have died 5 years ago, and I am still dealing with all their stuff. Also my kids have left the nest, so their/our stuff too. When I take goods to the donation centre, our stuff looks a lot better than most of what I see donated, and depending where I go the open bins can be outside, at the mercy of the weather ( I avoid that place if I can).

I too mostly take the donation route over selling, unless it looks like it will easily repay the effort. I too mourn the trashing of the planet over stuff. I feel bad that I am giving away possessions that my mother loved and assembled over the decades. And I too feel the decision fatigue of having to sift through mountains of stuff.

But what is the cost of not doing the work? I do not wish to drag all this stuff along with me for my remaining years, or, worse still, leave it to my family to sort out. The best I can do is to a) clear out and donate and hope that these items will bless someone else, and b) try not accumulate more stuff.

Ping pong with your boys sounds like a worthy goal!

[Fresh Bread]

I'll always try listing stuff for free before donating because I feel like there will be more eyes on it. Yes it's annoying if people don't show up and the whole process is slower, so it's not an option if you are moving soon, but in the end I think that the item will find it's home sooner that if it's buried in a thrift store. Clothing may be the exception because you often need to feel it, try it on etc.

And if I can't get rid online in a group of 100k people, chances are the thrift shop won't be able to sell it either and I'm just adding to their landfill bill. If I've tried to move it on with no luck, and then take it to a thrift shop *then* I do feel a bit guilty.

[Sibley]

The other thing to keep in mind is just because you think it has value doesn't mean it actually does. There was one day where I sat with my mom as she was trying to decide what to keep, and I ended up pulling up Ebay and checking their sold listings. All these things my mom thought were worth money were selling for $10 or whatever. It was rough for her. To her, they had value. But emotional value is not money value.

There's a lot of unwanted furniture out there, and it's only getting worse as people downsize or die. There's a real thing where no, your furniture is NOT wanted.

[mspym]

Movers are coming tomorrow so we are full steam ahead. Everything is either coming with us, getting thrown out, recycled or out on the street in a donation pile.

[FrugalShrew]

Gifted three declutter items to a friend over the weekend. She seemed genuinely happy to receive them.

I heard a great line in a youtube video from Caroline Winkler on decluttering that resonated. She said something like, "It's the getting-rid-of-something part that's hard. The not-having-it part isn't hard. Once it's gone from your life, there's really nothing hard about it."

Really the whole video was great. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAutdhF9MzU

[slackmax]

Continuing saga of moving Mom into Assisted Living. Props to all the kids out there spending huge amounts of time and energy and money to help your parents. It's something you just have to do, and are glad to be able to do for them, but still, it is a tremendous burden (imho).

Fortunately, my sister is a big help, although our personalities are really conflicting, as we endure this stress.   

Adding to the stress is the retirement community Mom lives in, and its not too competent admin staff. I have found them dreadful to work with in the past, and my sister has taken that on.   

I got a letter sent to my home from the CCRC. I have not requested that they contact me. I also got one of my mother's pharmacy bills sent to me as 'in care of' . I have not given anyone permission to do that. Very annoying. No escape, even when I am away from the CCRC, in my own home.

My sister had a video conference with the long term care insurance company yesterday. When she signed in, someone came on and said the conference was canceled due to the nurse being out sick. Sister has flight scheduled to leave soon.  She insisted they find another nurse, and they did, and the conference went on. This was to assess whether Mom has a need to be in Assisted Living, and qualify for coverage.

To sum up, kudos to all the other people doing similar things for their parents.       

 

[BeanCounter]

The other thing to keep in mind is just because you think it has value doesn't mean it actually does. There was one day where I sat with my mom as she was trying to decide what to keep, and I ended up pulling up Ebay and checking their sold listings. All these things my mom thought were worth money were selling for $10 or whatever. It was rough for her. To her, they had value. But emotional value is not money value.

There's a lot of unwanted furniture out there, and it's only getting worse as people downsize or die. There's a real thing where no, your furniture is NOT wanted.

Yes! I totally get this. It's hard to have an impartial view on your own crap!
I've identified four pieces of furniture I think I actually want to try to SELL. Pictures of two are attached (coffee table and side chair). I still like them but I just don't have a place for them as I've either kept things from my mother's house (she was a designer and had nice things) or I'm keeping more functional items for my family.
So should I try Facebook Marketplace for items like this or a local consignment shop? The consignment shop will keep half the proceeds if I drop the item off to their shop, 60% if they send a truck to pick up the items.

[slackmax]

The other thing to keep in mind is just because you think it has value doesn't mean it actually does. There was one day where I sat with my mom as she was trying to decide what to keep, and I ended up pulling up Ebay and checking their sold listings. All these things my mom thought were worth money were selling for $10 or whatever. It was rough for her. To her, they had value. But emotional value is not money value.

There's a lot of unwanted furniture out there, and it's only getting worse as people downsize or die. There's a real thing where no, your furniture is NOT wanted.

Yes! I totally get this. It's hard to have an impartial view on your own crap!
I've identified four pieces of furniture I think I actually want to try to SELL. Pictures of two are attached (coffee table and side chair). I still like them but I just don't have a place for them as I've either kept things from my mother's house (she was a designer and had nice things) or I'm keeping more functional items for my family.
So should I try Facebook Marketplace for items like this or a local consignment shop? The consignment shop will keep half the proceeds if I drop the item off to their shop, 60% if they send a truck to pick up the items.

BeanCOunter, I got rid of some medical supplies for free on Marketplace. I have sold a lot of stuff on FBM, but some stuff gets very little interest.

I listed 15 items like antique end tables, antique lamps, modern lamps, folding chairs, et al  that I just moved into my house, from my Mom's place.  Got no interest in any of it, except a ukelele, but it didn't sell anyway. Asking low prices.
Ironically, I also listed an old folding shelf with a semi-broken shelf, which I disclosed in the ad, with photos, and I got 50 responses in 2 days. I sold it on day 2. Got $10 for it, and one less clutter piece in my house. 

I took a beautiful marble top end Italian? end- table from my Mom's place, and I'm not even going to try to sell it. It's just too nice. I'm keeping it.   

[Captain FIRE]

@slackmax Briefly, because don’t want to derail this thread by going off topic, but FYI that many states have filial responsibility laws, which are pursued with varying degrees of enthusiasm from time to time. (In other words, some states have bad cases out there where kids had to pay for indigent parents.) This means you may not be able to stop getting bills etc.

[BeanCounter]

The other thing to keep in mind is just because you think it has value doesn't mean it actually does. There was one day where I sat with my mom as she was trying to decide what to keep, and I ended up pulling up Ebay and checking their sold listings. All these things my mom thought were worth money were selling for $10 or whatever. It was rough for her. To her, they had value. But emotional value is not money value.

There's a lot of unwanted furniture out there, and it's only getting worse as people downsize or die. There's a real thing where no, your furniture is NOT wanted.

Yes! I totally get this. It's hard to have an impartial view on your own crap!
I've identified four pieces of furniture I think I actually want to try to SELL. Pictures of two are attached (coffee table and side chair). I still like them but I just don't have a place for them as I've either kept things from my mother's house (she was a designer and had nice things) or I'm keeping more functional items for my family.
So should I try Facebook Marketplace for items like this or a local consignment shop? The consignment shop will keep half the proceeds if I drop the item off to their shop, 60% if they send a truck to pick up the items.

BeanCOunter, I got rid of some medical supplies for free on Marketplace. I have sold a lot of stuff on FBM, but some stuff gets very little interest.

I listed 15 items like antique end tables, antique lamps, modern lamps, folding chairs, et al  that I just moved into my house, from my Mom's place.  Got no interest in any of it, except a ukelele, but it didn't sell anyway. Asking low prices.
Ironically, I also listed an old folding shelf with a semi-broken shelf, which I disclosed in the ad, with photos, and I got 50 responses in 2 days. I sold it on day 2. Got $10 for it, and one less clutter piece in my house. 

I took a beautiful marble top end Italian? end- table from my Mom's place, and I'm not even going to try to sell it. It's just too nice. I'm keeping it.   

Wow. This is helpful data. I have a feeling that FB Marketplace is just too unpredictable. What are the odds that someone really goes through all of those posts looking for a unique side chair? Whereas people go into the consignment store looking for furniture to buy. So maybe even though I only get 50% of the sales it’s more likely to sell?

[tygertygertyger]

Or... why not list them on FB for a set period of time, like one week. If they haven't sold, then off to the consignment shop they go!

[slackmax]

@slackmax Briefly, because don’t want to derail this thread by going off topic, but FYI that many states have filial responsibility laws, which are pursued with varying degrees of enthusiasm from time to time. (In other words, some states have bad cases out there where kids had to pay for indigent parents.) This means you may not be able to stop getting bills etc.

Thanks. Yes, it's not exactly a decluttering subject, but thanks. The state is NJ. I know the CCRCs here are required to accept medicaid reimbursement for folks in a CCRC who run out of money.  But not sure if that is for Independent Living, Assisted Living, or Skilled Nursing or all 3.  Or if it has to be a certain type of CCRC.   She is forgetting to pay bills. I visit her once a month and make sure she is paying all her bills.     

 Haven't heard of billing relatives, in NJ. 

[Sibley]

@slackmax Briefly, because don’t want to derail this thread by going off topic, but FYI that many states have filial responsibility laws, which are pursued with varying degrees of enthusiasm from time to time. (In other words, some states have bad cases out there where kids had to pay for indigent parents.) This means you may not be able to stop getting bills etc.

Thanks. Yes, it's not exactly a decluttering subject, but thanks. The state is NJ. I know the CCRCs here are required to accept medicaid reimbursement for folks in a CCRC who run out of money.  But not sure if that is for Independent Living, Assisted Living, or Skilled Nursing or all 3.  Or if it has to be a certain type of CCRC.   She is forgetting to pay bills. I visit her once a month and make sure she is paying all her bills.     

 Haven't heard of billing relatives, in NJ.

It may not start as a decluttering topic, but it can certainly end as one. The paperwork, emails, and their stuff can really pile up.

[BeanCounter]

Loaded up a small car full of items to Goodwill. They refused to take a folding sewing machine table and a heavy folding wood table. SVO thrift also refused. So I’m probably going to have to pay to have our trash service pick it up. Which makes me angry. Stuff is such a burden!!
But the stuff I did get rid of- pictures, throw rugs, old storage ottoman and some sterling plated platters and pitcher was a win!

We still have a long way to go. DH is unwilling to part with his sports trophies from when he was like ten, and any of his very very large baseball card collection. It makes me furious but it’s not worth fighting over. But really? Your childhood trophies?? WHO CARES!!! SMH!!

[Adventine]

@BeanCounter have you tried posting the items on your local Buy Nothing groups? Someone may be happy to take them off your hands for free.

[RetiredAt63]

@BeanCounter have you tried posting the items on your local Buy Nothing groups? Someone may be happy to take them off your hands for free.

Was it a space issue at the thrift stores?  Those both sound at least as useful as the things that were accepted, so I second the Buy Nothing suggestion.

[BeanCounter]

@BeanCounter have you tried posting the items on your local Buy Nothing groups? Someone may be happy to take them off your hands for free.

Was it a space issue at the thrift stores?  Those both sound at least as useful as the things that were accepted, so I second the Buy Nothing suggestion.

I believe so! I just posted them on a buy nothing group and my husband put them on the curb so maybe they will be grabbed! If not the pool manager at our swim club said I could slip them into the dumpster late night before pickup.

I also posted three pieces. Of furniture for sale on our neighborhood Facebook groups. If they don’t sell I’ll email pictures to the consignment shop to see if they are interested in selling.
I’ve also got a set of Christmas dishes my MIL gave me (who thinks having a set of Christmas dishes to get out and clean is reasonable??) and two silver plate candelabras still in the box (also gifted by the MIL). I want to let them go and all of the attached expectations. I’m hoping the consignment shop will sell them.

Tiny baby steps of progress!! At least the basement is cool!!

[BeanCounter]

Well nobody on any of the FB groups seem interested. DH took sewing table and very heavy folding table to the dumpster.

I’m wondering if this is because I live in a nicer area and we all have too much stuff as it is? We all live in 3,000 sf homes and they are all full of stuff!!!

The over consumption in the US is really quite disturbing to me.

[slackmax]

Well nobody on any of the FB groups seem interested. DH took sewing table and very heavy folding table to the dumpster.

I’m wondering if this is because I live in a nicer area and we all have too much stuff as it is? We all live in 3,000 sf homes and they are all full of stuff!!!

The over consumption in the US is really quite disturbing to me.

BeanCounter,  I had to give away a working Singer sewing machine, in a wood cabinet. A very serious-faced young woman came to pick it up, and I put it in her car for her. I don't remember if she even said thank you.

But the next day I got a glowing email from her thanking me, and that her mom was using it to make clothes to sell, and was very happy with it. 

[LaineyAZ]

Ditto on the sewing machine.  A friend donated hers to a local refugee aid group which was teaching the refugees to sew and make an income.  They were thrilled to get it. 

[BeanCounter]

@LaineyAZ and @slackmax I'm glad your results where better than mine!
I was just trying to give away the folding sewing table. I'm keeping my sewing machine!! I'm actually using it today to hem some uniform shorts for my ten year old who as a soccer player is a bit wider in the rear than he is tall!! Got the shorts free from another mom. :)

I had always hoped I would use the sewing table more. I received it as a giveaway from a friends mom. But it was just too heavy and difficult for me to get out and setup to make it worth my while. I don't sew enough. when I do I just pop it onto the dining room table or a sturdy card table.

I'm doing better getting rid of stuff now. Trying to really focus on NOT keeping things for "some day when". If I haven't used it in 5-10 years "some day" isn't coming.

[getsorted]

Made $70 yesterday selling stuff on Marketplace, some of which I actually got for free! Less clutter and some fun money.