Making a $2 million deposit in your checking account

[Gerard]

Question for everyone:  what is the most money you've ever had down your pants?  I top out around $15k, but have a friend who has had 6-figures down there.  We are all very mature as you can tell.

I used to be a musician back in the days before widely available bank machines and such. We toured by greyhound. Sometimes I'd be in the back of the bus with the fruit pickers with $5K down my pants... uncomfortably often in fairly small bills. Probably some of the fruit pickers had even more.

edit: Man, just realized I posted roughly the same story twice in one thread. I must be more absent-minded than I thought...

[Wile E. Coyote]

I had to carry about $20k in gold coins in downtown Baltimore once. It was terrifying.

Guys, I don't care how much was in your pockets.  It has to be touching your junk.

Do diamonds count?;)

[Bajadoc]

I have been using the same bank branch for many many years and the service was always polite, efficient and understandably impersonal. I live in a beach town so my uniform is rather casual, board shorts and a tee shirt. A couple years ago I deposited a check for several hundred thousand dollars. Now, every time I go into the bank I am greeted by name, usually by more then one employee and sometimes the manager shakes my hand. It kind of feels weird and I thought about changing branches but the people are so nice I can't leave.

[Bolshevik Artizan]

My story, only 0.5% as good as this one, is when I needed physio and thought my healthcare plan covered it. When it turned out it didn't cover all of it, I said I'd go in and pay the $1000 balance in cash that afternoon. anyway, I got about seven reminder calls that day to go and pay from the receptionist. When I went in with the cash, I asked to see the manager, laid down ten $100 bills, got the receipt and walked out.

I subsequently got an email from the practice head apologizing for their behaviour but explaining that "few of our clients have the means to settle such a large bill for cash..."


:-)

[dragoncar]

I had to carry about $20k in gold coins in downtown Baltimore once. It was terrifying.

Guys, I don't care how much was in your pockets.  It has to be touching your junk.

Do diamonds count?;)

Extra points for diamond studded genital jewelry... But you have to use the real market value, not an inflated retail or appraisal prices

[Rosy]

LOL I guess the boobs will have to do:)

I'd just be grateful to have it all, the new house, the cash and the money to pay the taxes. CONGRATS!

[CowboyAndIndian]

I am right now walking around with the following bills in my pocket

• 50 Billion Dollars
• 20 Billion Dollars
• 500 Million dollars

Unfortunately, these are all Zimbabwe dollars and must be worth a few cents. (1 USD -> 35 Quadrillion Zimbabwe dollars).

And dragoncar, I am not putting them against my junk ;-)

[Dicey]

Here's a money in the pants story. DH was called for jury duty. Since he normally starts work early, he just headed straight to the courthouse and people watched. He wears steel-toed shoes to work, but after the first day, the deputies remembered him and didn't make him take them off. On about day three, he notices a very different crowd of people passing through courthouse security. He watches as a very pants-on-the-ground type guy passes through the metal detector ahead of him.

Deputy: Is that your wallet in your pocket?
POG: No, I put it in the bin.
Deputy: What about your other stuff?
POG: It's all in the bin, man.
Deputy: Then what do you still have in your pants?
POG: Oh, that's my money.

With that, he wrestles a softball-sized roll of cash out of his front pocket.

Our conclusion is that the reason they collect potential jurors into big windowless rooms and keep them there for ages when is so they won't see all the crazy shit the defendants coming for trials are up to. Sure, everyone carries around huge balls of cash!

And, while I didn't see it personally and didn't think to ask DH, I'm pretty sure it must have been touching his junk. OTOH, his pants were so low, maybe it was his knee...

[dragoncar]

Here's a money in the pants story. DH was called for jury duty. Since he normally starts work early, he just headed straight to the courthouse and people watched. He wears steel-toed shoes to work, but after the first day, the deputies remembered him and didn't make him take them off. On about day three, he notices a very different crowd of people passing through courthouse security. He watches as a very pants-on-the-ground type guy passes through the metal detector ahead of him.

Deputy: Is that your wallet in your pocket?
POG: No, I put it in the bin.
Deputy: What about your other stuff?
POG: It's all in the bin, man.
Deputy: Then what do you still have in your pants?
POG: Oh, that's my money.

With that, he wrestles a softball-sized roll of cash out of his front pocket.

Our conclusion is that the reason they collect potential jurors into big windowless rooms and keep them there for ages when is so they won't see all the crazy shit the defendants coming for trials are up to. Sure, everyone carries around huge balls of cash!

And, while I didn't see it personally and didn't think to ask DH, I'm pretty sure it must have been touching his junk. OTOH, his pants were so low, maybe it was his knee...

I've heard that walking around with a wad has beneficial psychological effects

[Trudie]

I love these stories!  I think it's because you never really know what people are about.  Sometimes we actually do play against type.

We are well off, but not what I'd consider spanking rich.  But my dream upon reaching FIRE is to gad about town while others speculate why/how I have all that free time.  Maybe they'll decide I'm some rocker's love child.  Or a Kennedy.  Or maybe both!

[bittheory]

Bravo. You, sir, are a hero. I hope to do the same thing one day while holding my skateboard in my hand.

[Dicey]

Dh and I just flipped our first house and it finally closed today! Too late in the day,so it's not in our account yet, alas. Instead of taking a check to the bank, we're just having it wired into our account. No shorts and flip-flops for us, not gonna walk into the bank at all. And yeah, it falls somewhat short of $2 mil, but it's still nice to put back a big chunk more than we took out to buy the place.

[jfisher3]

While I'm no where near close to that amount, I had a fun time in the bank after receiving back-pay for my military disability. (to the tune of $22k for 18 months of waiting on the VA).

I went to my local bank (high crime, low cost of living but closest to my house) to withdraw money to buy a work truck and a trailer from CL (yay money maker). We have about 8 accounts with this bank (organized by use, free checking accts makes online banking easy) so the teller only saw my primary checking and savings on their screen, so when I said I needed to withdraw $3000 they looked at me funny (ripped greasy t-shirt and jeans from working on truck) and asked which account I'd like to withdraw the money from. Fair question, as I had the required $5 in the savings account (required account) and about $200 in my primary checking. So I told her "the bigger one". With that, she scrolled down and audibly gasped seeing the other accounts (various amounts) and the one that my disability check went into. She was instantly much nicer to me and asked if I wanted an envelope for my money which I declined. Apparently she signaled someone because the cop that stands by the door walked me out to my car :D

[chouchouu]

Congrats! As a teen and young adult Occasionally I would close up the tills at my mums shop and take the days takings. It would be about 6k to 8k depending on how busy it got and put in a plastic supermarket bag. My mother would actually keep about 10k in her bag to pay for goods at market, since everyone prefers cash. When I was an exchange student in Japan my home room teacher was aghast at my mothers shabby handbag and lack of wallet so she bought my mother a new set but of course my mother never used it because she didn't want to attract attention and a wallet would never fit the wads of cash she kept anyway. Us kids usually did the banking and of course we just looked like a bunch of street urchins. The bank managers knew us but it was always funny when a new teller serves you and you pull out a bag of cash and start counting through wads of cash like a seasoned pro.

[happy]

Whenever my next trip to US will be, I'm not sure. However after this thread  I won't ever look at a greenback without wondering where it might have been!

[northernlights]

I love this thread. My husband once had a client pay off a large lawyer bill in cash and we definitely made it rain inside our 8 year old Honda before we manually rolled down the windows and deposited the money.

[MgoSam]

Wow, a year or so ago I went to my local bank to deposit a 6 figure check and thought that the tellers were somewhat unpolite. The lady there looked at me and unfriendly said, "Just so you know, it may be take up to 5 business days for this check to clear," and obviously had the impression that me, as a 25 year old then, couldn't possibly come by this with honest means. Thankfully, it actually cleared in 2 days and I moved it to Vanguard.

[Hummer]

Why would you put money in your pants? There's always the possibility that it slides down your pant leg and you have to somehow wrestle your money into a secure location again without anybody noticing what you are doing...

I don't think I could ever put money in my pants unless it was in my boxers. I would be too afraid of it falling down...

[MgoSam]

I would never voluntarily have a lot of cash on my person. At least not with asset forfeiture laws in place. It's just not worth the risk, or the hassle (my business does get paid in cash from time to time, which we will deposit as soon as we can).

[happy]

Why would you put money in your pants? There's always the possibility that it slides down your pant leg and you have to somehow wrestle your money into a secure location again without anybody noticing what you are doing...

I don't think I could ever put money in my pants unless it was in my boxers. I would be too afraid of it falling down...

I'd wear bloomers if I really wanted to store it down there.

[Wanna-Be-FI-Bri]

Bigote- I think I'm in love with your post.

Definitely one of my favorites. :)

[MountainManMustache]

Congrats and a great story.

This happened to me this past January, although my check was a lot less (only $360k). 

Upon presenting the teller with my check and deposit slip I was ushered to where the free coffee and comfortable chairs were located and visited by a private banker while the teller processed my deposit.  They asked if there would be similar such checks coming in the future.  When I shared with them that the money would only be here for a week until it cleared - at which time I would pay off my mortgages on my two homes and move the remaining money to another account at another institution - they began to question my plan to pay off my mortgages and instead attempt to lure me to let the money "ride" with them on promises of greater return.  I told them that paying off my mortgages would enable me to live on less income so greater returns would never win out over the security of not having mortgages on my two homes as I would be FIRE the following week. 

The private banker was stunned by this comment, had no comeback and I have not heard from them since.

The two houses where I live (different states) are now paid off and I am living comfortably on my savings, having fun, without stress and Corporate B.S.

Happy Days!

[Landslave]

Wow!  I don't believe I'll ever get a chance to do this, but it sure would be fun.  I'd make sure to put it down my pants first.

Question for everyone:  what is the most money you've ever had down your pants?  I top out around $15k, but have a friend who has had 6-figures down there.  We are all very mature as you can tell.

I had a check for $65K down my pants.  I swear it felt warm, too!!

[Dicey]

I got the whole "private banking" rigamarole at Chase when I went in to make my measly $15k deposit for their cash back offer.  Didn't realize before I went in that they would ask me a whole slew of questions about our finances.  So as I'm listing off my (just my) retirement accounts, I could see the dollar signs starting to glow in the bank lady's eyes.  She eventually handed me the "our services" brochure and went off to get the private banking rep to introduce me in person.  They were nice about it, not pushy, but man, they want their hands on my money.  They followed up with both a handwritten note and a phone call a few days later.  I just politely told them I was happy with  my financial setup as it was.  I'm kind of dreading going in on Jan 2 (the day my $200 signup bonus posts) to close the account.  I guess there are some people who will leave the money there just to avoid the awkwardness.  Not me.  I'm getting a nice 5% return right now with this bonus, but it would drop to their standard .01% rate on Jan 2.  Even my credit union beats that.

Yeah, we bank at Chase too. We just purchased another rental and decided we wanted a mortgage to lock up some cheap money before it goes away. Their rates were good, but the process was a complete pain in the ass. We had 25% down and 2.5x the mortgage amount in our accounts with them, but it was still a nightmare. We're FI Mustachians and DH still has steady employment (awesome pension pending). It was still a complete cluster fuck. Just awful. It finally closed (two+ weeks late) and Chase is a good servicer, but oy vey!

And they kept trying to push us into their private banking program. Yeah, we have enough to qualify for it but we didn't get it by paying retail for our investments and we're sure as hell not going to lock it up with them. Finally told them not to ever, ever approach us with that pitch again. We'll see...

[Cwadda]

If I had that kind of money, the first thing I'd do is take out about $100,000 out in cash, bring it home, and spread it all over the table. Just to see what it looks like.

This is a great thread.

[Dicey]

Lol, last week I was madly searching for something I'd misplaced. I stumbled on an envelope of cash with DH's name on it in my dresser drawer. Seems he'd sold some equipment to a friend, who paid in hundreds. He'd slipped it in my drawer when he got home but forgot to tell me. It was nowhere near 100k, but it was still fun to discover. BTW, DH has a lovely habit of buying his gear used on CL and then selling it when he's done with it. He always cleans it up nicely, takes good photos and writes a complete ad. I'm surprised at how often he turns a profit.

[bop]

Great story, Bigote.  I happened to read it just before we sold our NYC apartment last year, so I was hoping for a similar story.  We ended up with a check for 1.63 million dollars, which I deposited it at our local bank (Chase).  But unlike your deposit form, mine had enough digits.  When the teller saw the check, his eyes got wide and he mumbled something about "that's a large check", but (unlike your bankers) he didn't offer me free coffee or anything.  Oh well.  I guess I'll just have to be satisfied with the money. :-)   

[Imonaboat]

I looked like a homeless person when we found our house until I wrote a check for over 100k, got some interesting looks :)

[lostamonkey]

Great story, Bigote.  I happened to read it just before we sold our NYC apartment last year, so I was hoping for a similar story.  We ended up with a check for 1.63 million dollars, which I deposited it at our local bank (Chase).  But unlike your deposit form, mine had enough digits.  When the teller saw the check, his eyes got wide and he mumbled something about "that's a large check", but (unlike your bankers) he didn't offer me free coffee or anything.  Oh well.  I guess I'll just have to be satisfied with the money. :-)   

I think in NYC tellers are used to people dealing with such large amounts of money. If you had deposited the same cheque in a small town in a flyover state, then their reaction would be very different.

[Megma]

Great story, Bigote.  I happened to read it just before we sold our NYC apartment last year, so I was hoping for a similar story.  We ended up with a check for 1.63 million dollars, which I deposited it at our local bank (Chase).  But unlike your deposit form, mine had enough digits.  When the teller saw the check, his eyes got wide and he mumbled something about "that's a large check", but (unlike your bankers) he didn't offer me free coffee or anything.  Oh well.  I guess I'll just have to be satisfied with the money. :-)   

I think in NYC tellers are used to people dealing with such large amounts of money. If you had deposited the same cheque in a small town in a flyover state, then their reaction would be very different.

Not sure you should discount the "flyover" states, warren buffet lives in Nebraska after all 😃

[RWD]

If I had that kind of money, the first thing I'd do is take out about $100,000 out in cash, bring it home, and spread it all over the table. Just to see what it looks like.

This is a great thread.

Ever watched the movie Dodgeball? (note, the stack shown is not big enough for $100k)

I don't know if you've ever seen 100,000 dollars, except in the movies. But, I assure you something gets lost in the translation.

[dragoncar]

If I had that kind of money, the first thing I'd do is take out about $100,000 out in cash, bring it home, and spread it all over the table. Just to see what it looks like.

This is a great thread.

Ever watched the movie Dodgeball? (note, the stack shown is not big enough for $100k)

I don't know if you've ever seen 100,000 dollars, except in the movies. But, I assure you something gets lost in the translation.

Yeah, it's not that much.  This site is fun:

http://www.pagetutor.com/trillion/index.html

here's a million:

[brooklynguy]

Yeah, it's not that much.

For a more impressive stack of cash, you need to ask the teller for smaller denominations.  A pile of one million singles would be a hundred times bigger.

[Glenstache]

As a side note: I greatly enjoy that this thread is immediately adjacent to a discussion of dumpster diving for food in the forum feed.

Nice job, Biogte and a fun story to boot!

[johnny847]

Yeah, it's not that much.

For a more impressive stack of cash, you need to ask the teller for smaller denominations.  A pile of one million singles would be a hundred times bigger.

Good luck finding a bank that has one million in singles in their vault ;)

[Cwadda]

If I had that kind of money, the first thing I'd do is take out about $100,000 out in cash, bring it home, and spread it all over the table. Just to see what it looks like.

This is a great thread.

Ever watched the movie Dodgeball? (note, the stack shown is not big enough for $100k)

I don't know if you've ever seen 100,000 dollars, except in the movies. But, I assure you something gets lost in the translation.

Yeah, it's not that much.  This site is fun:

http://www.pagetutor.com/trillion/index.html

here's a million:

Awesome link. I'd still do it for the hell of it.

Here's another similar link: http://demonocracy.info/infographics/usa/us_debt/us_debt.html

[clarkfan1979]

if it's in a regular checking account, is that full amount insured by FDIC?  I thought it only went up to $250,000 per person.

That was my concern as well. Amazing story!

[muckety_muck]

That's an amazingly awesome story... but 2 yrs ago. Is he/she still around on the forums?

Have never thought about putting $$ anywhere near my nether regions... too worried about the germs on it from someone ELSE putting it where it doesn't belong!!! ewwww  $ bills are nasty. But then again, $2M can make you do crazy things!

[RWD]

That's an amazingly awesome story... but 2 yrs ago. Is he/she still around on the forums?

Last login was only three days ago. Though his last post was in March of this year.

[MrSal]

Just a quick reminder to the OP that the FDIC insurance limit on accounts is generally $250K, so if the bank were to fail you could lose $1.75M.  If it's one of the big guys and it's only a couple of days, probably not a big deal, but something to think about.

FDIC had been in existence since the depression... So you know how many times has  it  been used? I believe is zero times.

The process of bankruptcy is pretty efficient... First the shareholders are wiped out... Then bondholders... Then suppliers... And only then depositors.

[Glenstache]

Just a quick reminder to the OP that the FDIC insurance limit on accounts is generally $250K, so if the bank were to fail you could lose $1.75M.  If it's one of the big guys and it's only a couple of days, probably not a big deal, but something to think about.

FDIC had been in existence since the depression... So you know how many times has  it  been used? I believe is zero times.

The process of bankruptcy is pretty efficient... First the shareholders are wiped out... Then bondholders... Then suppliers... And only then depositors.

Except for all of the bank failures administered by the FDIC in 2008 and 2009 to the point at which they were running into reserves.

[RWD]

Just a quick reminder to the OP that the FDIC insurance limit on accounts is generally $250K, so if the bank were to fail you could lose $1.75M.  If it's one of the big guys and it's only a couple of days, probably not a big deal, but something to think about.

FDIC had been in existence since the depression... So you know how many times has  it  been used? I believe is zero times.

The process of bankruptcy is pretty efficient... First the shareholders are wiped out... Then bondholders... Then suppliers... And only then depositors.

I found this, but I'm not exactly sure what it means:
https://www.fdic.gov/bank/individual/failed/banklist.html

[Glenstache]

Just a quick reminder to the OP that the FDIC insurance limit on accounts is generally $250K, so if the bank were to fail you could lose $1.75M.  If it's one of the big guys and it's only a couple of days, probably not a big deal, but something to think about.

FDIC had been in existence since the depression... So you know how many times has  it  been used? I believe is zero times.

The process of bankruptcy is pretty efficient... First the shareholders are wiped out... Then bondholders... Then suppliers... And only then depositors.

I found this, but I'm not exactly sure what it means:
https://www.fdic.gov/bank/individual/failed/banklist.html

Even if the FDIC did not have to reimburse any depositors at those failed banks (because of the lineup listed above), the FDIC insurance prevented people from panicking and therefore prevented a run on the banks. A run on banks does cause very legitimate problems. The FDIC insurance was used in that sense across the board by providing at least some faith in the banking system in dark times. As a practical matter, the FDIC did spend a lot of money on banks in 2008 and 2009, I'm just too lazy to look up the references.

[Gerard]

Even if the FDIC did not have to reimburse any depositors at those failed banks (because of the lineup listed above), the FDIC insurance prevented people from panicking and therefore prevented a run on the banks. A run on banks does cause very legitimate problems.

I think there are two different issues here. One, that FDIC-type insurance is useful to stabilize the banking system, whether it's ever needed or not. That's a macro thing.

At the micro level, the fact it's never been used is useful data for me as an individual. In Canada, banks pay higher rates on deposits over the insurable limit. If I can get those higher rates knowing that the risk is infinitesimally small, I might as well.

At the *practical* level, I don't care, because the "higher" rates are still a tiny fraction of what I would earn in almost any other investment!

[Glenstache]

Even if the FDIC did not have to reimburse any depositors at those failed banks (because of the lineup listed above), the FDIC insurance prevented people from panicking and therefore prevented a run on the banks. A run on banks does cause very legitimate problems.

I think there are two different issues here. One, that FDIC-type insurance is useful to stabilize the banking system, whether it's ever needed or not. That's a macro thing.

At the micro level, the fact it's never been used is useful data for me as an individual. In Canada, banks pay higher rates on deposits over the insurable limit. If I can get those higher rates knowing that the risk is infinitesimally small, I might as well.

At the *practical* level, I don't care, because the "higher" rates are still a tiny fraction of what I would earn in almost any other investment!

Except that some depositors did lose money. It was limited because most banks were acquired by other banks that took over the deposits. Most accounts were below the FDIC threshold, so the uninsured deposits accounted for a small percentage of the total value of the bank. There is a real risk to having deposits in excess of $250k, even if small.
Here are a few links in that vein:
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/money_co/2009/10/fdics-bair-delivers-bad-news-to-uninsured-indymac-depositors.html
https://www.depositaccounts.com/blog/review-of-2009-bank-failures-and-what.html

[Gerard]

Except that some depositors did lose money.

Good to know. Thanks.

The math might be different for me here in Canada... the insured cutoff is lower (100K), and we have far fewer "real" banks (6, basically).

[secondcor521]

Just a quick reminder to the OP that the FDIC insurance limit on accounts is generally $250K, so if the bank were to fail you could lose $1.75M.  If it's one of the big guys and it's only a couple of days, probably not a big deal, but something to think about.

FDIC had been in existence since the depression... So you know how many times has  it  been used? I believe is zero times.

Wrong.  It has been used hundreds of times.  I used it personally when IndyMac bank failed and I had several hundred thousand dollars on deposit with them.  Because I was aware of the limits I structured my deposits in such a way that all of my deposits were insured, but the risk of loss is actual and real if small.

As someone else alluded to above, the FDIC took over hundreds of banks in the 2008-2009 time frame.  Even more failed during the S&L crisis.

Every year there are usually a few bank failures.

Here's a decent looking article:

http://www.davemanuel.com/history-of-bank-failures-in-the-united-states.php

[brett2k07]

Why would you turn down the banks offer to become a private client?

You can get all kinds of perks and benefits plus a higher rate of return on your deposits.

Sorry, just saw this.   

Maybe I should look into it, I assumed they just want to manage my investments, put them in high-ER funds, and charge a wrap fee of 1-2%, all while giving me certain perks like free wire transfers and coffee when I come in to the bank (which is usually never).

I used to work for one of the major banks, and my branch personally serviced Tiger Woods and several high net worth individuals. The Private Banking Client status for this particular bank basically got you a dedicated banker. We were not allowed to approach them with any sales pitches at all, everything had to come from their private banker. They also got certain other perks: free tickets to sporting events, even in cities 4.5 hours away, pretty much whatever you wanted (within reason) the bank did what they could to provide it for you. If you needed cash (to buy a car, or whatever) they would have the money personally delivered to your home. The only requirement I know of to qualify was to have $1 million or more on deposit with them. It could be spread among deposit accounts and investment accounts, but the sum total had to be $1 million. I don't know the fee structure associated with that status though.

We had several interesting clients, some of the nicest people you will ever meet with gobs of money. We serviced the gentleman who owns all of the Mercedes dealerships in our region. There was a young rap artist. It was a pretty diverse clientele. It was fun to talk to them and look at all of the zeroes.

But the pay was shit, and the sales requirements were far too stringent to stay. The sales quotas ran a month a time, and each teller had to get the equivalent of 3 new checking accounts every single day. And if the person walked in and said they wanted to open a new account, you weren't allowed to take credit for that new account. Luckily, we had pretty good bankers who gave us credit anyway. Other than the people, I hated that job.

[Proud Foot]

Just a quick reminder to the OP that the FDIC insurance limit on accounts is generally $250K, so if the bank were to fail you could lose $1.75M.  If it's one of the big guys and it's only a couple of days, probably not a big deal, but something to think about.

FDIC had been in existence since the depression... So you know how many times has  it  been used? I believe is zero times.

Wrong.  It has been used hundreds of times.  I used it personally when IndyMac bank failed and I had several hundred thousand dollars on deposit with them.  Because I was aware of the limits I structured my deposits in such a way that all of my deposits were insured, but the risk of loss is actual and real if small.

The FDIC has definitely been used.  From the list in the link RWD posted above I looked at the press release for the first one (Hometown National Bank, Longview, WA). From the press release, the bank had $4.9m total assets and $4.7in deposits and the purchasing bank aquired $3.8m of the failed bank's assets.  The FDIC retained the remainder for disposition and estimated a cost to the Deposit Insurance Fund to be $1.9m.

[InvestandChill]

Wow!  I don't believe I'll ever get a chance to do this, but it sure would be fun.  I'd make sure to put it down my pants first.

Question for everyone:  what is the most money you've ever had down your pants?  I top out around $15k, but have a friend who has had 6-figures down there.  We are all very mature as you can tell.

Damn it. I've never put money down my pants and I feel like I've really missed out.

Read this and got major FOMO. These coins in my sweats do feel nice. Glad I didn't wait any longer to jump in on this.