Author Topic: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much  (Read 1257 times)

mozar

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Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« on: October 04, 2018, 04:37:52 PM »
Hello,
I have a 3 bedroom house. I used to only rent one room and then I decided to rent the other room (two rooms). Roommate A has lived with me for a year. Roommate B moved in a few weeks ago. Roommate A decided to move out. But then roommate A and B decided to date eachother.
Roommate A has moved out all his stuff but now is spending all day every day at my house. He works at night.
I told roommate B that she may have a guest 3 days a week and she agreed. This is over text. I have to look over my lease again to see the exact wording, but the county law says I can't have more than 1 person per room.
I'm figuring out how to proceed.
I doubt she is going to make sure her boyfriend isn't staying over more than 3 days a week.
I might have to end her lease anyway for other reasons and if it comes to eviction I have already researched on how that happens.
I'm thinking of taking a pic of the former roommates car every day he is here. Anything else I could be doing?

Orvell

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #1 on: October 04, 2018, 05:11:45 PM »
To clarify, what is the issue? Is it that ExRoomate (A) is spending time at your house without paying money? Is he sleeping over?
1 person per room is an odd law, are you sure that's correct?
Frankly, since you're living in the house and this is more of a roommate situation than landlord from afar situation, I feel like this is a bit strange. Can't you just have an honest conversation? "Look B, I like A and all, but there needs to be a limit on how often he's over. You're the tenant, not him, and unless he starts paying rent again, we need to limit the number of nights he sleeps over. Thanks for understanding."

On the other hand, you previously lived with both of them. Why not just offer to re-write the lease for an increased amount (but still not twice the rent) to account for the added wear and tear on the room and let them both live there? You get more $, and then it isn't an issue.
Assuming it is legal for the room to have an occupancy of 2, of course.

EDIT: I re-read and realized they have only been dating for a short amount of time, and thus likely don't want to be on a lease together. So that last point might be out of touch.

frugalone

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #2 on: October 04, 2018, 05:18:22 PM »
Wearing my Landlord hat here.  They seem to be playing you.   Talk to her/him and set the record straight.  That is the only way you will find out what they are thinking and address it.

electriceagle

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #3 on: October 04, 2018, 06:21:46 PM »
Are you in a rent-controlled location where you cannot evict a tenant-roommate without just cause? Is there a fixed period remaining on the lease or is Roomie B month-to-month.

If no to both questions, check and see if your state law requires 30 or 60 days notice to terminate without cause if you decide that you are unhappy.

ixtap

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #4 on: October 04, 2018, 06:28:35 PM »
Have you rented out the room that A vacated? If not, the county law is entirely irrelevant. And as someone already mentioned, odd. I have heard of limiting the number of occupants per room, or the number of unrelated adults, but never, ever, one person per room.

Overall, this is a roommate situation, try talking.

kudy

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #5 on: October 04, 2018, 06:57:13 PM »
When I had a roommate and this was happening (her boyfriend stayed over every night for weeks on end), I told her that she was exceeding the number of "guest" nights in the lease and that she either had to cut it down, or start paying more. We discussed and he moved into her room with her and they paid 1.5x the previous room rent.

mozar

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #6 on: October 04, 2018, 07:10:19 PM »
Yeah it's one person per room. I actually had to go through a certification process and that's what they explained. I could be interpreting wrong, stranger things have happened. But I don't want 2 people in that room anyway.
Roommate B is month to month. I did tell her there is a limit to how much he can stay over, which she agreed to, but I doubt she will adhere to it.
I like the idea of giving her 60 days notice just to be in the clear with everything. I can't remember if it's 60 days or 30 days in my state.
I agree that they are trying to play me. I have been very clear and upfront and even confrontational with the other things roommate B has tried to get away with. I never had problems with roommate A until now.
Thank you all for not being harsh. I actually re wrote my lease with help from people on this forum, but everytime I feel like I've covered all shenanigans, there are new shenanigans. It's like wack-a-mole.

mozar

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #7 on: October 05, 2018, 09:05:07 AM »
Does anybody know on what date I can give 30 days? Do I have to wait until Nov 1 to give 30 days? I live in MD, all the articles talk about the tenant having to wait until the 1st. I want to give 30 days notice today. The articles are vague about thr landlord.

frugalone

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #8 on: October 05, 2018, 09:09:14 AM »
In my 26 years of experience you can give notice to them today.  Make it 30 days.  So they would have to be out by Oct 6th.  Realizing they are paid until the 31st of this month.  You can give notice at anytime of the month.  Most wait until the 1st as tenants aren't going to pay after you give them notice so essentially you are giving them the extra 6 days of rent as you are not going to get it from them.

The articles you are reading pertain to the rent that would be owed by the tenant for the next month if they give notice after the first.  You are the one requesting them to leave as the landlord.  You are within your right to forgive the 6 days rent due for November (which you should).
« Last Edit: October 05, 2018, 09:15:30 AM by frugalone »

mozar

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #9 on: October 05, 2018, 09:56:16 AM »
Thank you very much! Do I have to mail a notice to vacate letter? She also has her rent check automatically put in my bank account from her trust fund each month, so maybe that makes things easier. I'm still working on getting up the courage to do it. I have done this before and it never gets easier.

ixtap

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #10 on: October 05, 2018, 09:57:31 AM »
Does anybody know on what date I can give 30 days? Do I have to wait until Nov 1 to give 30 days? I live in MD, all the articles talk about the tenant having to wait until the 1st. I want to give 30 days notice today. The articles are vague about thr landlord.

This amuses me because I once had a landlord who tried to argue that I hadn't given 30 days notice when I turned the notice in on the 1st of a 31 day month. That was their policy, as the receptionist informed me when I handed her the notice. It took several layers, but I actually talked to the namesake of that property company that particular day.

The nice thing about month to month contracts is that you don't need a reason, you just need that <read the contract> days notice. I find it ideal for roommate situations.

Jon Bon

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #11 on: October 05, 2018, 07:40:28 PM »
To me this feels a lot more like a roommate problem then it does a landlord problem. You are going to keep track of the coming and going of a tenants guests?

This is the house you live in, and it sounds like these are random renters and not friends? So I get how you don't love the situation. But if he moved his stuff out and stays over with his SO which I feel is very common whats the issue?

Again its different because it is the house you live in. But I dont stop by and take 'attendance' at my rental properties. So I guess if you want to rent out your own house to random people, yeah you are going to have stuff like this?

Good luck to you either way. To me it sounds a bit like you would rather live in the place by yourself with no renters. Home is a place where I dont want to put up with any BS from other people, sounds like you feel the same way!


frugalone

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #12 on: October 06, 2018, 06:07:31 AM »
Thank you very much! Do I have to mail a notice to vacate letter? She also has her rent check automatically put in my bank account from her trust fund each month, so maybe that makes things easier. I'm still working on getting up the courage to do it. I have done this before and it never gets easier.

No, hand it to her in person.  Then send a follow up text so you have proof she received it.

ixtap

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #13 on: October 06, 2018, 09:35:56 AM »
Thank you very much! Do I have to mail a notice to vacate letter? She also has her rent check automatically put in my bank account from her trust fund each month, so maybe that makes things easier. I'm still working on getting up the courage to do it. I have done this before and it never gets easier.

No, hand it to her in person.  Then send a follow up text so you have proof she received it.

The means of communication should be in the lease. Just something to keep in mind if you plan to continue to rent out rooms.

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #14 on: October 06, 2018, 10:09:32 AM »
Quote
In my 26 years of experience you can give notice to them today.

In mozarís state?

mozar, does your state list the regulations online or at your library? Laws are public info, so you should be able to look them up. Unless a person is familiar with the current laws in your region, we canít tell you what they are. Sometimes an agency (law or nonprofit) will have translated those into clear mini guides too.

Note too that some places have a different set of laws for roommate situations (here they have few rights and in many arrangements can be booted with zero notice) than for landlord-tenant ones (generally own door, kitchen, bathroom).

Also, even if legal notice would only *apply* at the end of a calendar month, you can still *give* the proper notice before that. So if Oct 6 you gave notice for Nov 30, maybe they straighten up starting Oct 6 and you all have more time to observe, negotiate, etc.

mozar

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #15 on: October 06, 2018, 10:19:56 AM »
Ok, thanks all. I'm still working on figuring out the legalese.

Fishingmn

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #16 on: October 09, 2018, 06:40:35 AM »
Here's the language I use in my lease if you want to add this in the future -

Tenant(s) shall not allow any other person, other than Tenantís immediate family or transient relatives and friends who are guests of Tenant(s), to use or occupy the Premises without first obtaining Landlordís written consent to such use. Any guest staying in the property more than 2 weeks in any 6 month period will be considered a tenant, rather than a guest. They must go through landlordís background check process and be added in the lease agreement. Landlord may also increase the rent at any such time that a new tenant is added to the lease or premise.

joonifloofeefloo

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #17 on: October 09, 2018, 08:59:22 AM »
^ And if that kind of restriction is legal where you are, mozar, consider wording like ď14 nights (consecutive or consecutive) out of any six month period.Ē Otherwise you can get people trying endless nonconsecutive nights and saying ďbut sheís never stayed two weeks; she only stayed 13 nights in June, 13 in July...Ē.

Again, check your areaís laws first.

Iím allowed an overnight guest only 14 nights per 365 days. That prevents me from having someone stay Dec 16-31 then Jan 1-Jan 14, for example.

cchrissyy

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Re: Roommates boyfriend stays over too much
« Reply #18 on: October 09, 2018, 09:40:51 AM »
I've been the renter in a multi-family housing situation, and while I've never had an overnight guest or an issue with other people's guests, here are the relevant parts of those agreements in case that helps you.