I'd only add that you should believe her if she says she doesn't want anything huge. I told my husband that I didn't need a big diamond, and I'd like it if our bands matched. He ended up proposing with his mother's engagement ring (his dad passed away and she doesn't wear it anymore), which had a much larger stone than I was expecting. We got a ring made to reset the stone into, and I really do love it - it is beautiful and shiny and people admire it all the time, plus he didn't have to spring for a center stone, so it wasn't as pricy as it could have been.
However, he got me a white gold band that matches his wedding band for Christmas this year (we've been married 5 years), and it's all I've worn since. I love that it matches his, and it works better for me - I wear nitrile gloves all the time at work, and my other ring tore them fairly often, unless I just didn't wear it. It's also better for yardwork and for anything in the winter, since I can just pull my gloves on over it much more easily.
I'll definitely still wear the other fancy band, because it's gorgeous, but I really think I would have been happy with the plain gold band if that's what we'd started with.