Author Topic: Words/phrases I wish would go away  (Read 611850 times)

marble_faun

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #950 on: June 19, 2019, 01:39:06 PM »
In dog-owner circles, there is a big differentiation in meaning between "buying" and "adopting."  For some it has become a moral/political issue.

There are tons of dogs in shelters that need homes. If they aren't adopted, a lot of them will be euthanized.  You do pay a small fee to the shelter to adopt, but this is not referred to as "buying."

There are also breeders and puppy mills who are producing new dogs to sell, as a for-profit enterprise, sometimes for $2,000+.  Getting a dog from this type of source is referred to as buying.

Technically I suppose buying a dog could be considered "adopting" it in some sense, but people in this world draw a strong line between the two ways of getting dogs.  (A friend of mine was very active in animal rescue work and had a slogan: "Don't breed or buy while shelter pets die.")

My parents paid $10k to adopt me back in 1972.  I'm sure it profited the birth mom.  Does that mean I should tell people I was bought?

No.  The words "adopt" and "buy" have a particular meanings in the pet world, which have no bearing on human adoption. 

(At least not until we arrive at some strange version of the future, with human birthing-mills and business where you go to pick out a child that has been bred for particular traits, etc. Then maybe the terms would be parallel.)

I also don't want to take this thread too far off track, so I will leave it at that! 

Dicey

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #951 on: June 19, 2019, 02:17:02 PM »
I find the term TREATS offensive when my coworkers are talking about junk food left out by the coffee.  Treats are for training dogs.

Actually, I'm not offended at all; I just find it funny.  And it lets me feel smugly superior, which is really what life is all about.
Yeah, but "Trick or Snack" doesn't have the same ring to it...

RetiredAt63

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #952 on: June 19, 2019, 03:50:26 PM »
In dog-owner circles, there is a big differentiation in meaning between "buying" and "adopting."  For some it has become a moral/political issue.

There are tons of dogs in shelters that need homes. If they aren't adopted, a lot of them will be euthanized.  You do pay a small fee to the shelter to adopt, but this is not referred to as "buying."

There are also breeders and puppy mills who are producing new dogs to sell, as a for-profit enterprise, sometimes for $2,000+.  Getting a dog from this type of source is referred to as buying.

Technically I suppose buying a dog could be considered "adopting" it in some sense, but people in this world draw a strong line between the two ways of getting dogs.  (A friend of mine was very active in animal rescue work and had a slogan: "Don't breed or buy while shelter pets die.")
Reaaaly don't want to drag this thread off topic but responsible breeders that give a shit are not making money, or at least that's not their goal.  Breeding dogs is not cheap when done right.  We lost money on our last litter, and came out ahead on the previous one (if you only count costs directly related to the litter).  I hand-waved the numbers and that time we made almost $1/hr.   And it's a ton of work and derails your life.  It's a really bad way to make money.

There are plenty of backyard breeders making money cutting corners or "breeding" designer dogs, and they should be condemned, but not every breeder is a piece of shit and not every breeder is doing it for the cash.

This.  Most good breeders are lucky if they break even.  There are huge differences between breeders and back yard breeders and puppy mills.

Jouer

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #953 on: June 21, 2019, 07:38:35 AM »
In dog-owner circles, there is a big differentiation in meaning between "buying" and "adopting."  For some it has become a moral/political issue.

There are tons of dogs in shelters that need homes. If they aren't adopted, a lot of them will be euthanized.  You do pay a small fee to the shelter to adopt, but this is not referred to as "buying."

There are also breeders and puppy mills who are producing new dogs to sell, as a for-profit enterprise, sometimes for $2,000+.  Getting a dog from this type of source is referred to as buying.

Technically I suppose buying a dog could be considered "adopting" it in some sense, but people in this world draw a strong line between the two ways of getting dogs.  (A friend of mine was very active in animal rescue work and had a slogan: "Don't breed or buy while shelter pets die.")

My parents paid $10k to adopt me back in 1972.  I'm sure it profited the birth mom.  Does that mean I should tell people I was bought?

You totally should! "I was worth $10k as a baby but now I'm worth [net worth]. I'm a great investment!!"

;-)

Cool Friend

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #954 on: June 21, 2019, 08:48:34 AM »
Drives me up the fucking wall when people describe themselves as "humbled" when what they mean is "honored."

SpeedReader

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #955 on: June 21, 2019, 10:43:44 PM »
Someone probably said it already, but the phrase I most wish would go away is "President Trump".

Dicey

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #956 on: June 21, 2019, 10:49:50 PM »
Someone probably said it already, but the phrase I most wish would go away is "President Trump".
Amen!

Roadrunner53

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #957 on: June 22, 2019, 03:18:16 AM »
Someone probably said it already, but the phrase I most wish would go away is "President Trump".
Amen!

Agreed!

Adam Zapple

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #958 on: June 23, 2019, 07:02:58 AM »
I may have already commented on this, and I didn't read the entire thread, but I cringe at the phrase "No worries" when it is used in place of "You're welcome."  I hate it for some reason.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #959 on: June 23, 2019, 07:05:32 AM »
I may have already commented on this, and I didn't read the entire thread, but I cringe at the phrase "No worries" when it is used in place of "You're welcome."  I hate it for some reason.
Interesting--I actually really like it, if the intent is really there.  As in "hey, it was a pleasure, don't worry about it burdening me."  If it's just a rote phrase, though, then yeah...

sui generis

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #960 on: June 24, 2019, 02:29:10 AM »
This isn't truly on point for this thread, but it's related and it really tickled me, so I thought I'd share.  Just finished a trip to Kenya and Rwanda and in hotels and other service-places, people often greet you by saying, heartily, "You are welcome" when you walk in.  I thought it was rather formal-sounding and sweet.  But when you do say thank you for something they do for you, the response is often simply "Welcome" and I thought how funny it was that they use the two phrases in precisely the opposite situations I use them.

Cool Friend

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #961 on: June 24, 2019, 08:47:32 AM »
I may have already commented on this, and I didn't read the entire thread, but I cringe at the phrase "No worries" when it is used in place of "You're welcome."  I hate it for some reason.

I've somehow slipped into the habit of doing this and I feel stupid every time I say it. I don't mind when people say it to me, but for some reason I think it sounds dorky coming out of my mouth.  Gonna have to condition myself to say Hakuna Matata instead.

John Galt incarnate!

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #962 on: July 07, 2019, 01:26:21 PM »
In Tacked

^

Here is a most unusual misspelling of "intact."

Need2Save

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #963 on: September 13, 2019, 06:39:00 PM »
I wish people would stop pretending that they are "gifting" me time when a conference call naturally ends earlier than the scheduled half hour or hour. 

"It looks like I can give you twenty minutes back in your day"...(you know because we finished discussing all topics 20 minutes before the original meeting invite 'end time').

Well, no, you aren't "giving me twenty minutes" really are you?  You heard some other beanhead say that on a call like 12 months ago and now you can't help yourself from saying it at the end of every friggin call you end that isn't a full 60 minutes! 

Lord help me! This is a contagious virus that I wish would die a quick death.

BicycleB

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #964 on: September 13, 2019, 08:26:02 PM »
decimate                   reduce    Decimate literally means reduce by one tenth. From Latin.

Decimate refers to the Roman military practice of punishing a group of soldiers by killing one in every ten of them (typically selected by lots).  If we're going to get picky and only use ancient definitions for things it would be incorrect to define decimate as 'reduction by one tenth', that loses the original meaning almost entirely.

One might say that the word's meaning has been... decimated.

Nick_Miller

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #965 on: September 17, 2019, 09:48:46 AM »
I see people on Twitter type "imma" and tryna"

I just can't.

ketchup

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #966 on: September 17, 2019, 11:09:28 AM »
I see people on Twitter type "imma" and tryna"

I just can't.
But can you even?

BlueHouse

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #967 on: September 18, 2019, 02:11:38 PM »
I'm pretty sure I'm going to be hated for saying this, but it really gets under my skin when people call themselves a "single mom" if they're divorced or if there is anyone acting in the second parent position.  "Single mom" to me means that they're doing it all themselves, when in fact, they may be co-parenting, just living in separate homes. 
If the point is to let eligible mates know that they are available to date, then just stop at "single".  If the point is to let people know that you're a mom, then just say so. 

I'm bitter because my somewhat irresponsible niece is a "single mom" who expects to be congratulated for doing 'such a great job' when in fact, she's leeching off her parents due to her less-than-ideal life choices. 

nessness

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #968 on: September 18, 2019, 02:31:23 PM »
I'm pretty sure I'm going to be hated for saying this, but it really gets under my skin when people call themselves a "single mom" if they're divorced or if there is anyone acting in the second parent position.  "Single mom" to me means that they're doing it all themselves, when in fact, they may be co-parenting, just living in separate homes. 
If the point is to let eligible mates know that they are available to date, then just stop at "single".  If the point is to let people know that you're a mom, then just say so. 

I'm bitter because my somewhat irresponsible niece is a "single mom" who expects to be congratulated for doing 'such a great job' when in fact, she's leeching off her parents due to her less-than-ideal life choices.
Huh. I don't hate you for this comment, but I don't agree with your definition either. I would consider anyone who is single and has custody of their child to be a single parent.

I just googled the definition and Merriam-Webster (more or less) agrees with me - "a parent who lives with a child or children and no husband, wife, or partner. " No stipulation that they have to live with the child 100% of the time.

robartsd

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #969 on: September 19, 2019, 09:16:21 AM »
I'm pretty sure I'm going to be hated for saying this, but it really gets under my skin when people call themselves a "single mom" if they're divorced or if there is anyone acting in the second parent position.  "Single mom" to me means that they're doing it all themselves, when in fact, they may be co-parenting, just living in separate homes. 
If the point is to let eligible mates know that they are available to date, then just stop at "single".  If the point is to let people know that you're a mom, then just say so. 

I'm bitter because my somewhat irresponsible niece is a "single mom" who expects to be congratulated for doing 'such a great job' when in fact, she's leeching off her parents due to her less-than-ideal life choices.
I know someone who lived as a single mom in a situation somewhat like your niece. She and the dad actually did get married, but he soon left them because he couldn't deal with the responsibility. She rose to the occasion and I admire the job she has done raising her son. She has worked hard at low skill jobs, and could not financially support an independent household so she continued to live with her parents. As her son got older, she started to feel that a male role model would be useful in his life, so she began pursuing divorce to free herself to remarry. I don't know the details, but eventually dad convinced her that they could try to be a family again. Their son was thrilled. I'm very impressed that she forgave him enough to give it a shot. They are still living with her aging parents; no longer because the young family needs the support, but because her parents can't make it on their own at this point. I imagine the young dad feels a bit embarrassed about his past shirking of his responsibilities; but he's working hard alongside his wife to take care of their son and also doing a lot to help care for her parents (her dad requires a lot of care at this point and son-in-law is now providing a good deal of it).

Sure, lots of single moms have come to the situation due to their own irresponsible choices. The equally irresponsible dads often escape responsibility. Some of the moms are fortunate enough to have supportive extended family. I think it is better to respect people's current efforts to take responsibility rather than constantly judging them for their former irresponsible choices.

Tyson

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #970 on: September 21, 2019, 06:59:25 PM »
Original comment removed, no need to be quite that bitter. 
« Last Edit: September 21, 2019, 10:03:16 PM by Tyson »

sui generis

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #971 on: September 21, 2019, 08:40:16 PM »
I wish people would stop pretending that they are "gifting" me time when a conference call naturally ends earlier than the scheduled half hour or hour. 

"It looks like I can give you twenty minutes back in your day"...(you know because we finished discussing all topics 20 minutes before the original meeting invite 'end time').

Well, no, you aren't "giving me twenty minutes" really are you?  You heard some other beanhead say that on a call like 12 months ago and now you can't help yourself from saying it at the end of every friggin call you end that isn't a full 60 minutes! 

Lord help me! This is a contagious virus that I wish would die a quick death.

When I read this previously, I was like, "huh, I've never heard that!"  Probably because my meetings never end early.  One did yesterday and voila!  You are right.  It's a thing.

calimom

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #972 on: September 21, 2019, 09:11:11 PM »
I'm pretty sure I'm going to be hated for saying this, but it really gets under my skin when people call themselves a "single mom" if they're divorced or if there is anyone acting in the second parent position.  "Single mom" to me means that they're doing it all themselves, when in fact, they may be co-parenting, just living in separate homes. 
If the point is to let eligible mates know that they are available to date, then just stop at "single".  If the point is to let people know that you're a mom, then just say so. 

I'm bitter because my somewhat irresponsible niece is a "single mom" who expects to be congratulated for doing 'such a great job' when in fact, she's leeching off her parents due to her less-than-ideal life choices.
Huh. I don't hate you for this comment, but I don't agree with your definition either. I would consider anyone who is single and has custody of their child to be a single parent.

I just googled the definition and Merriam-Webster (more or less) agrees with me - "a parent who lives with a child or children and no husband, wife, or partner. " No stipulation that they have to live with the child 100% of the time.

No hate from me but for different reasons. I've been widowed and raising 3 kids alone for the past dozen years. I really, really object to women saying this either in online forums or IRL when they are married and their otherwise involved partner is out of town on business. A mother once told me she was a single mom "this week" and it was so hard.when I was trying to hurry my son along after a Little League practice. I was rushing because I needed to pick up my youngest from day care so I wouldn't be dinged with late fees and then collect my eldest who was patiently waiting for was for a ride home. The evening ahead was going to be making dinner and overseeing baths and homework for the hundredth time, and several hundred similar nights were ahead. To my great good creditI did not slap her or say anything snarky, just "oh wow, that sounds really rough!"

News flash: If your living husband whom you are not divorced from is not available for a few days you are not a "single mother".

jinga nation

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #973 on: September 23, 2019, 07:28:42 AM »
I see people on Twitter type "imma" and tryna"

I just can't.
But can you even?
That's an odd fragment... :-p

frugalnacho

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #974 on: October 01, 2019, 11:01:16 AM »
Someone at my work leaves the s off of possessives.   Instead of saying "it is on Fred's desk" they will say "it is on Fred desk".  They say it constantly and it drives me nuts.

Kris

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #975 on: October 01, 2019, 12:51:39 PM »
Something that really weirds me out is how many people don't change the verb "text" in the past tense -- at least in writing.

"He text me yesterday about it."

Dee

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #976 on: October 02, 2019, 09:19:32 PM »
Similarly, I get irritated when people don't make the words "beer" or "pair" plural when indicating two beer or two pair. Ick.

sui generis

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #977 on: October 02, 2019, 09:59:09 PM »
I am for some reason really irked by the use of the word "holding" for like job responsibilities/work.  E.g., "Thank you for holding that [task]" or "you are holding so much right now, no wonder you're exhausted!"

RetiredAt63

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #978 on: October 14, 2019, 08:49:38 AM »
Back to homonyms, or almost homonyms.  Populous for populace - yes they sound almost the same, but they are not the same.

Kris

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #979 on: October 14, 2019, 09:34:13 AM »
Ugh -- people who type "weary" when they mean "wary" or "leery."

RetiredAt63

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #980 on: October 14, 2019, 10:04:19 AM »
Ugh -- people who type "weary" when they mean "wary" or "leery."

I'm guessing some of those are typos without proof-reading, or spell check "corrections".

Kris

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #981 on: October 14, 2019, 10:06:44 AM »
Ugh -- people who type "weary" when they mean "wary" or "leery."

I'm guessing some of those are typos without proof-reading, or spell check "corrections".

I see this all. the. time. I doubt they are all typos. I see "weary" much more often than "wary" or "leery." I'm assuming the errors self-reinforce: people see others writing the word incorrectly, and then assume it's correct, so they start doing it, too.

sui generis

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #982 on: October 14, 2019, 11:09:27 AM »
Ugh -- people who type "weary" when they mean "wary" or "leery."

I'm guessing some of those are typos without proof-reading, or spell check "corrections".

I see this all. the. time. I doubt they are all typos. I see "weary" much more often than "wary" or "leery." I'm assuming the errors self-reinforce: people see others writing the word incorrectly, and then assume it's correct, so they start doing it, too.

If weary weren't already it's own word, I'd totally advocate for combining wary and leery into one portmanteau-ish word of weary!  But it's almost like the pre-existence of weary, which is legit wary and leery combined, encourages people to use weary when they mean leery/wary.  I sympathize, but it totally grates still.

As a lawyer, precedence vs. precedent. Not interchangeable!

RetiredAt63

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #983 on: October 14, 2019, 12:30:38 PM »
Ugh -- people who type "weary" when they mean "wary" or "leery."

I'm guessing some of those are typos without proof-reading, or spell check "corrections".

I see this all. the. time. I doubt they are all typos. I see "weary" much more often than "wary" or "leery." I'm assuming the errors self-reinforce: people see others writing the word incorrectly, and then assume it's correct, so they start doing it, too.

I did say "some".  ;-)  You would not believe the typos I find myself making, some fingers go faster than others and the letters get redistributed.

I'm sure some of it is self-reinforcing.  But I would bet some of those "weary"s are from people who say "wary" as if it were "weary" and spell it accordingly.  Of course I say it correctly (well my region's definition of correctly) so I spell it correctly.

frugalnacho

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #984 on: October 14, 2019, 12:40:02 PM »
You have to be weary about relying on spell check too much because it doesn't always understand context.

Kris

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #985 on: October 14, 2019, 01:08:37 PM »
Ugh -- people who type "weary" when they mean "wary" or "leery."

I'm guessing some of those are typos without proof-reading, or spell check "corrections".

I see this all. the. time. I doubt they are all typos. I see "weary" much more often than "wary" or "leery." I'm assuming the errors self-reinforce: people see others writing the word incorrectly, and then assume it's correct, so they start doing it, too.

I did say "some".  ;-)  You would not believe the typos I find myself making, some fingers go faster than others and the letters get redistributed.

I'm sure some of it is self-reinforcing.  But I would bet some of those "weary"s are from people who say "wary" as if it were "weary" and spell it accordingly.  Of course I say it correctly (well my region's definition of correctly) so I spell it correctly.

I’ve never heard of a region where it’s pronounced “weary.” Do you have an example? I’m fascinated.

RetiredAt63

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #986 on: October 14, 2019, 01:42:12 PM »
Ugh -- people who type "weary" when they mean "wary" or "leery."

I'm guessing some of those are typos without proof-reading, or spell check "corrections".

I see this all. the. time. I doubt they are all typos. I see "weary" much more often than "wary" or "leery." I'm assuming the errors self-reinforce: people see others writing the word incorrectly, and then assume it's correct, so they start doing it, too.

I did say "some".  ;-)  You would not believe the typos I find myself making, some fingers go faster than others and the letters get redistributed.

I'm sure some of it is self-reinforcing.  But I would bet some of those "weary"s are from people who say "wary" as if it were "weary" and spell it accordingly.  Of course I say it correctly (well my region's definition of correctly) so I spell it correctly.

I’ve never heard of a region where it’s pronounced “weary.” Do you have an example? I’m fascinated.

No.  But considering the variation in English pronunciation, I am sure someplace it happens.

The thing with the standard Canadian accent is that there actually is one, courtesy of the CBC. Sure there are regional accents, but they are not as varied as American or English (in England) ones.  I was a Cub leader with three Brits, and they had three totally different accents; you would have thought they were from three different countries.  Jagmeet Singh, on the other hand, has a typical Canadian accent.  Canadians may look different, but by the time we are second generation we all sound pretty much the same.

I do know someone who regularly says "youse" for the English plural you, it is a local rural Ontario word.

Dicey

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #987 on: October 16, 2019, 06:44:31 AM »
My Dad went to Cambridge High and Latin School in Cambridge, MA. Ergo, he spoke fluent Latin. He also said "youse" or "youse guys" occasionally. We thought it was funny.

KBecks

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #988 on: October 16, 2019, 07:41:54 PM »
"My bad." 

Ugh.

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #989 on: October 16, 2019, 11:21:36 PM »
I'm pretty sure I'm going to be hated for saying this, but it really gets under my skin when people call themselves a "single mom" if they're divorced or if there is anyone acting in the second parent position.  "Single mom" to me means that they're doing it all themselves, when in fact, they may be co-parenting, just living in separate homes. 
If the point is to let eligible mates know that they are available to date, then just stop at "single".  If the point is to let people know that you're a mom, then just say so. 

I'm bitter because my somewhat irresponsible niece is a "single mom" who expects to be congratulated for doing 'such a great job' when in fact, she's leeching off her parents due to her less-than-ideal life choices.

Interesting. I haven’t looked at this thread in several months but was just part of a conversation about this issue last night. Our neighbourhood started a Single Parents Group. Someone mentioned that they objected to the title (for the same reasons you cited). Another person (who became a widow with two children at a very young age) in the group said that the “proper” term for a parent with no other parent in the picture (either deceased or deadbeat/not involved) is sole parent. I’d never given the issue any thought (not being a parent myself), but that distinction made a lot of sense to me.

GreenToTheCore

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #990 on: October 17, 2019, 04:16:28 PM »
Interesting. I haven’t looked at this thread in several months but was just part of a conversation about this issue last night. Our neighbourhood started a Single Parents Group. Someone mentioned that they objected to the title (for the same reasons you cited). Another person (who became a widow with two children at a very young age) in the group said that the “proper” term for a parent with no other parent in the picture (either deceased or deadbeat/not involved) is sole parent. I’d never given the issue any thought (not being a parent myself), but that distinction made a lot of sense to me.
Nice insight, @Step37 . This whole string is very interesting.


Edit: ridiculous spelling mistake
« Last Edit: October 18, 2019, 01:13:14 PM by GreenToTheCore »

Dicey

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #991 on: October 18, 2019, 07:28:54 AM »
Interesting. I haven’t looked at this thread in several months but was just part of a conversation about this issue last night. Our neighbourhood started a Single Parents Group. Someone mentioned that they objected to the title (for the same reasons you cited). Another person (who became a widow with two children at a very young age) in the group said that the “proper” term for a parent with no other parent in the picture (either deceased or deadbeat/not involved) is sole parent. I’d never given the issue any thought (not being a parent myself), but that distinction made a lot of sense to me.
Nice incite, @Step37 . This whole string is very interesting.
Oh, no...

ketchup

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #992 on: October 18, 2019, 12:59:34 PM »
Someone at my work leaves the s off of possessives.   Instead of saying "it is on Fred's desk" they will say "it is on Fred desk".  They say it constantly and it drives me nuts.
I have someone at work that overuses possessives in place of plurals.  But only about half the time.  Even with the same words.

Birthday's

Visitor's

Then in the next sentence: visitors

It drives me crazy.

GreenToTheCore

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #993 on: October 18, 2019, 01:11:56 PM »
Interesting. I haven’t looked at this thread in several months but was just part of a conversation about this issue last night. Our neighbourhood started a Single Parents Group. Someone mentioned that they objected to the title (for the same reasons you cited). Another person (who became a widow with two children at a very young age) in the group said that the “proper” term for a parent with no other parent in the picture (either deceased or deadbeat/not involved) is sole parent. I’d never given the issue any thought (not being a parent myself), but that distinction made a lot of sense to me.
Nice incite, @Step37 . This whole string is very interesting.
Oh, no...
*palm to forehead*

Travis

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #994 on: October 26, 2019, 05:33:05 AM »
-"Posting to follow"

-Linking someone's name on Facebook in the comments section without saying anything else

-Quoting entire lines verbatim of the Youtube video we all just watched in the comments section of that video. No commentary, no context, just a word for word quote.

BlueHouse

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #995 on: October 31, 2019, 10:14:57 AM »
I'm pretty sure I'm going to be hated for saying this, but it really gets under my skin when people call themselves a "single mom" if they're divorced or if there is anyone acting in the second parent position.  "Single mom" to me means that they're doing it all themselves, when in fact, they may be co-parenting, just living in separate homes. 
If the point is to let eligible mates know that they are available to date, then just stop at "single".  If the point is to let people know that you're a mom, then just say so. 

I'm bitter because my somewhat irresponsible niece is a "single mom" who expects to be congratulated for doing 'such a great job' when in fact, she's leeching off her parents due to her less-than-ideal life choices.
Huh. I don't hate you for this comment, but I don't agree with your definition either. I would consider anyone who is single and has custody of their child to be a single parent.

I just googled the definition and Merriam-Webster (more or less) agrees with me - "a parent who lives with a child or children and no husband, wife, or partner. " No stipulation that they have to live with the child 100% of the time.

No hate from me but for different reasons. I've been widowed and raising 3 kids alone for the past dozen years. I really, really object to women saying this either in online forums or IRL when they are married and their otherwise involved partner is out of town on business. A mother once told me she was a single mom "this week" and it was so hard.when I was trying to hurry my son along after a Little League practice. I was rushing because I needed to pick up my youngest from day care so I wouldn't be dinged with late fees and then collect my eldest who was patiently waiting for was for a ride home. The evening ahead was going to be making dinner and overseeing baths and homework for the hundredth time, and several hundred similar nights were ahead. To my great good creditI did not slap her or say anything snarky, just "oh wow, that sounds really rough!"

News flash: If your living husband whom you are not divorced from is not available for a few days you are not a "single mother".

@calimom -- that may be why I hate it so much.  My mom was widowed at age 34 with 5 children under 12. Sure, we all made it through okay, but growing up without two parents is not anything that I would ever do to a child on purpose.   I still get pretty upset that there are people who do it on purpose.

p.s.  you're doing a great job.  Your kids will someday appreciate how hard it all was. 



Interesting. I haven’t looked at this thread in several months but was just part of a conversation about this issue last night. Our neighbourhood started a Single Parents Group. Someone mentioned that they objected to the title (for the same reasons you cited). Another person (who became a widow with two children at a very young age) in the group said that the “proper” term for a parent with no other parent in the picture (either deceased or deadbeat/not involved) is sole parent. I’d never given the issue any thought (not being a parent myself), but that distinction made a lot of sense to me.

Any possibility they could have meant solo parenting?  That would make more sense, wouldn't it?  If you're the sole parent, does that imply cloning?
« Last Edit: October 31, 2019, 10:17:03 AM by BlueHouse »

sui generis

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #996 on: October 31, 2019, 12:57:11 PM »
I just recalled how much I hated the term "get your mind around" something back about, what, 20-ish years ago when people were starting to use it?  And how I have now fully bought into it and was just using it this morning. So yeah, a decade or two from now, we should all check back on our posts here and see if we are making our former selves cringe with the phrases we have since given in and adopted.

Morning Glory

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #997 on: October 31, 2019, 01:26:12 PM »
Did I mention "nare" before? The singular form of "nares" (Latin word for nostrils) is "naris". There is no such thing as "nare".

John Galt incarnate!

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #998 on: October 31, 2019, 05:19:55 PM »
Ugh -- people who type "weary" when they mean "wary" or "leery."

I'm guessing some of those are typos without proof-reading, or spell check "corrections".

I see this all. the. time. I doubt they are all typos. I see "weary" much more often than "wary" or "leery." I'm assuming the errors self-reinforce: people see others writing the word incorrectly, and then assume it's correct, so they start doing it, too.

I did say "some".  ;-)  You would not believe the typos I find myself making, some fingers go faster than others and the letters get redistributed.

I'm sure some of it is self-reinforcing.  But I would bet some of those "weary"s are from people who say "wary" as if it were "weary" and spell it accordingly.  Of course I say it correctly (well my region's definition of correctly) so I spell it correctly.

I’ve never heard of a region where it’s pronounced “weary.” Do you have an example? I’m fascinated.

+1

BlueHouse

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #999 on: November 03, 2019, 04:49:20 PM »
Did I mention "nare" before? The singular form of "nares" (Latin word for nostrils) is "naris". There is no such thing as "nare".

I have never heard this word before and can't wait to impress my family when I tell them to stick it up their nares.  :)

 

Wow, a phone plan for fifteen bucks!