Author Topic: Words/phrases I wish would go away  (Read 111538 times)

John Galt incarnate!

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #900 on: June 05, 2019, 11:42:35 AM »

"custum"  "breaded"

^

The same person misspelled "custom" and "braided."

« Last Edit: June 05, 2019, 11:45:40 AM by John Galt incarnate! »

BlueHouse

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #901 on: June 10, 2019, 01:56:22 PM »
I wish there were a way to see all my posts on just this topic.  Because I have more I want to contribute, but I think I may have already said them.  :(

Use the print view: https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/off-topic/wordsphrases-i-wish-would-go-away/?action=printpage

And then hit control+f and search for "Post by: BlueHouse"

I see 22 of them.

10-20 seconds per post, I estimate it'll take you 5-10 minutes to read through them all.
Genius!  Thanks!

BlueHouse

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #902 on: June 10, 2019, 02:02:54 PM »
People who say they "built" a house when they really mean they hired a builder and picked out a design. It's up there with saying you "rescued" a dog (George Carlin had a bit on that one.

I felt the same way about rescues, until I adopted my dog through a rescue org.  They literally saved this dog from euthanasia, and explained to me that because I was taking the dog directly off transport, it opened up another foster care spot for another dog. So yeah, I do say he's a rescue dog now.


ketchup

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #903 on: June 10, 2019, 02:15:55 PM »
People who say they "built" a house when they really mean they hired a builder and picked out a design. It's up there with saying you "rescued" a dog (George Carlin had a bit on that one.

I felt the same way about rescues, until I adopted my dog through a rescue org.  They literally saved this dog from euthanasia, and explained to me that because I was taking the dog directly off transport, it opened up another foster care spot for another dog. So yeah, I do say he's a rescue dog now.
I have a coworker that bought his dog from one of those awful puppy-mill pet stores.  He likes to say he "rescued" him from the awful pet store.

No. No, no, no.

iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #904 on: June 11, 2019, 07:42:25 AM »
People who say they "built" a house when they really mean they hired a builder and picked out a design. It's up there with saying you "rescued" a dog (George Carlin had a bit on that one.

I felt the same way about rescues, until I adopted my dog through a rescue org.  They literally saved this dog from euthanasia, and explained to me that because I was taking the dog directly off transport, it opened up another foster care spot for another dog. So yeah, I do say he's a rescue dog now.
I have a coworker that bought his dog from one of those awful puppy-mill pet stores.  He likes to say he "rescued" him from the awful pet store.

No. No, no, no.

This the problem with popularizing “rescue” as a virtuous act. My friend said she “rescued”a puppy from a breeder.

Um no honey, you bought a dog. Own it. It ain’t against the law.

Any Tom, Dick, or Harry  can set themselves up as a rescue organization. We had to kick an elderly couple out of the national breed rescue organization for stockpiling dogs and selling them. It was mos def a money making operation for them.

Back to friends who rescue dogs: that same friend who “rescued” the dog from a breeder, bought one of those mixed breed dogs. Ummm, ok, whatever lady. But when she floated the idea of breeding it I said straight up in front of her and her husband at a dinner party —sure she can do that it is not against the law—but I would shun her. Yes I would be shunning her if she bred that dog. We all laughed uncomfortably about that and she Blathered about how she had bred  excellent dogs blah blah blah blah but it was all a lot of bullshit. They knew I was serious, and shunning is my only tool.

Yet my other friend on the other side of the scale will practically  start crying when she thinks about herself and her virtuosity in rescuing a house full of dogs she has. These really are street dogs. For a while she was an animal collector and she had way too many dogs and cats in her house.

Crying about shit always annoys me unless it’s very serious stuff like someone dies.
« Last Edit: June 11, 2019, 08:10:41 AM by iris lily »

ketchup

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #905 on: June 11, 2019, 08:59:01 AM »
Back to friends who rescue dogs: that same friend who “rescued” the dog from a breeder, bought one of those mixed breed dogs. Ummm, ok, whatever lady. But when she floated the idea of breeding it I said straight up in front of her and her husband at a dinner party —sure she can do that it is not against the law—but I would shun her. Yes I would be shunning her if she bred that dog. We all laughed uncomfortably about that and she Blathered about how she had bred  excellent dogs blah blah blah blah but it was all a lot of bullshit. They knew I was serious, and shunning is my only tool.
Yeesh.  Talking about "breeding" a designer dog.  That's so much worse than even breeding for the purpose of making designer dogs.  Related: https://www.grca.org/find-a-golden/more-topics-before-you-buy/goldendoodles/

GuitarStv

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #906 on: June 11, 2019, 09:17:23 AM »
Crying about shit always annoys me unless it’s very serious stuff like someone dies.

Yeah.  Fuck those assholes with their feelings.  :P

iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #907 on: June 11, 2019, 10:05:25 AM »
Crying about shit always annoys me unless it’s very serious stuff like someone dies.

Yeah.  Fuck those assholes with their feelings.  :P

Yes, some people cry easily, there is a big physiological component to it. Doesn't necessarily  mean you (the generic you) are a special kind of feeling human because you cry.

In my household DH  tears up over non emergency stuff, and I dont. This difference  is largely due to our physical makeup. Menopause showed that to be true for me. Haha. Glad I am over that!


iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #908 on: June 11, 2019, 10:13:43 AM »
Back to friends who rescue dogs: that same friend who “rescued” the dog from a breeder, bought one of those mixed breed dogs. Ummm, ok, whatever lady. But when she floated the idea of breeding it I said straight up in front of her and her husband at a dinner party —sure she can do that it is not against the law—but I would shun her. Yes I would be shunning her if she bred that dog. We all laughed uncomfortably about that and she Blathered about how she had bred  excellent dogs blah blah blah blah but it was all a lot of bullshit. They knew I was serious, and shunning is my only tool.
Yeesh.  Talking about "breeding" a designer dog.  That's so much worse than even breeding for the purpose of making designer dogs.  Related: https://www.grca.org/find-a-golden/more-topics-before-you-buy/goldendoodles/

Yeah, it was a gold doodle. Fairly Brainless.  But very cute!

OTOH she and her husband are super good dog parents. They ended up with two Doodles, there was fighting (no kidding,  two bitches!)  and they carried out appropriate training activities for the girls. I was always i presed when
I would visit the Doodle household and the girls would be told to “go to your corner” and they did!

Roadrunner53

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #909 on: June 11, 2019, 11:46:45 AM »
Back to friends who rescue dogs: that same friend who “rescued” the dog from a breeder, bought one of those mixed breed dogs. Ummm, ok, whatever lady. But when she floated the idea of breeding it I said straight up in front of her and her husband at a dinner party —sure she can do that it is not against the law—but I would shun her. Yes I would be shunning her if she bred that dog. We all laughed uncomfortably about that and she Blathered about how she had bred  excellent dogs blah blah blah blah but it was all a lot of bullshit. They knew I was serious, and shunning is my only tool.
Yeesh.  Talking about "breeding" a designer dog.  That's so much worse than even breeding for the purpose of making designer dogs.  Related: https://www.grca.org/find-a-golden/more-topics-before-you-buy/goldendoodles/

Yeah, it was a gold doodle. Fairly Brainless.  But very cute!

I have never been around a golden doodle but I would think they would be very smart and relaxed dogs. I have had 4 poodles in my lifetime and they are beyond smart. To the point they exasperate  you with their intelligent nature. When they insist on something they will not give it up! The word NO doesn't exist when they have something in their heads. Years ago we had a poodle when I was a teen. That dog would kick a dog biscuit under the fridge. It could have been weeks before she had done it. Well, she would smell it one day and insist she had to have it. She would bark her head off. No coaxing would make her stop. My Dad who was pretty low on patience would have to drag the fridge out and it was a heavy beast so the dog could get the tid bit that was under there. These dogs have so much energy and get 'bored'. That is where cross breeding would seem ideal. Seems you would get an intelligent, toned down, relaxed dog.

OTOH she and her husband are super good dog parents. They ended up with two Doodles, there was fighting (no kidding,  two bitches!)  and they carried out appropriate training activities for the girls. I was always i presed when
I would visit the Doodle household and the girls would be told to “go to your corner” and they did!

iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #910 on: June 11, 2019, 01:49:33 PM »
Back to friends who rescue dogs: that same friend who “rescued” the dog from a breeder, bought one of those mixed breed dogs. Ummm, ok, whatever lady. But when she floated the idea of breeding it I said straight up in front of her and her husband at a dinner party —sure she can do that it is not against the law—but I would shun her. Yes I would be shunning her if she bred that dog. We all laughed uncomfortably about that and she Blathered about how she had bred  excellent dogs blah blah blah blah but it was all a lot of bullshit. They knew I was serious, and shunning is my only tool.
Yeesh.  Talking about "breeding" a designer dog.  That's so much worse than even breeding for the purpose of making designer dogs.  Related: https://www.grca.org/find-a-golden/more-topics-before-you-buy/goldendoodles/

Yeah, it was a gold doodle. Fairly Brainless.  But very cute!

I have never been around a golden doodle but I would think they would be very smart and relaxed dogs. I have had 4 poodles in my lifetime and they are beyond smart. To the point they exasperate  you with their intelligent nature. When they insist on something they will not give it up! The word NO doesn't exist when they have something in their heads. Years ago we had a poodle when I was a teen. That dog would kick a dog biscuit under the fridge. It could have been weeks before she had done it. Well, she would smell it one day and insist she had to have it. She would bark her head off. No coaxing would make her stop. My Dad who was pretty low on patience would have to drag the fridge out and it was a heavy beast so the dog could get the tid bit that was under there. These dogs have so much energy and get 'bored'. That is where cross breeding would seem ideal. Seems you would get an intelligent, toned down, relaxed dog.

OTOH she and her husband are super good dog parents. They ended up with two Doodles, there was fighting (no kidding,  two bitches!)  and they carried out appropriate training activities for the girls. I was always i presed when
I would visit the Doodle household and the girls would be told to “go to your corner” and they did!

Probably I am just being breedist.

I have tons of respect for standard poodles and their brainpower. Not so much for goldens. anyone who has a good line of standard poodles wouldn’t be mixing with that anyway. So it’s only money focused mills and backyard breeders who are producing these doodle dogs.





iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #911 on: June 13, 2019, 11:37:35 AM »
I was reminded today that some people are offended by those of us who used the word “adopt” as in “today I adopted a dog.”

What word am I supposed to use?

I have adopted many cats and dogs over my lifetime. I have 0 human children. Believe me, I know the difference between taking in a human child and a dog, that is why I dont have children either from my loins or adopted.

I doubt I will stop using the word “adopt” because it is a pretty good word for this concept and I do not know one that is better. Should I “get” a dog? “Take in” a dog?

Dicey

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #912 on: June 13, 2019, 12:14:21 PM »
I was reminded today that some people are offended by those of us who used the word “adopt” as in “today I adopted a dog.”

What word am I supposed to use?

I have adopted many cats and dogs over my lifetime. I have 0 human children. Believe me, I know the difference between taking in a human child and a dog, that is why I dont have children either from my loins or adopted.

I doubt I will stop using the word “adopt” because it is a pretty good word for this concept and I do not know one that is better. Should I “get” a dog? “Take in” a dog?
I suppose adopting new habits are off the table too? I'm with you, iris lily. Not going to fret about that one.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #913 on: June 13, 2019, 12:30:20 PM »
I was reminded today that some people are offended by those of us who used the word “adopt” as in “today I adopted a dog.”

What word am I supposed to use?

I have adopted many cats and dogs over my lifetime. I have 0 human children. Believe me, I know the difference between taking in a human child and a dog, that is why I dont have children either from my loins or adopted.

I doubt I will stop using the word “adopt” because it is a pretty good word for this concept and I do not know one that is better. Should I “get” a dog? “Take in” a dog?
Just so I understand better, people object to the word "adopt" being applied to anything other than a child?  (At first, in my mind, I thought your post might be in the context of "rescuing" pets upthread)

iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #914 on: June 13, 2019, 01:21:27 PM »
I was reminded today that some people are offended by those of us who used the word “adopt” as in “today I adopted a dog.”

What word am I supposed to use?

I have adopted many cats and dogs over my lifetime. I have 0 human children. Believe me, I know the difference between taking in a human child and a dog, that is why I dont have children either from my loins or adopted.

I doubt I will stop using the word “adopt” because it is a pretty good word for this concept and I do not know one that is better. Should I “get” a dog? “Take in” a dog?
Just so I understand better, people object to the word "adopt" being applied to anything other than a child?  (At first, in my mind, I thought your post might be in the context of "rescuing" pets upthread)
Yes they do. I have been corrected more than once about using that word ”adopt” about a dog.

Google it. it’s a thing in the adoption community.

Here’s the first instance in my Google search:

https://adoption.com/forums/thread/383035/the-term-quot-adoption-quot-for-pets/
« Last Edit: June 13, 2019, 01:52:01 PM by iris lily »

Kris

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #915 on: June 13, 2019, 01:28:38 PM »
I was reminded today that some people are offended by those of us who used the word “adopt” as in “today I adopted a dog.”

What word am I supposed to use?

I have adopted many cats and dogs over my lifetime. I have 0 human children. Believe me, I know the difference between taking in a human child and a dog, that is why I dont have children either from my loins or adopted.

I doubt I will stop using the word “adopt” because it is a pretty good word for this concept and I do not know one that is better. Should I “get” a dog? “Take in” a dog?
Just so I understand better, people object to the word "adopt" being applied to anything other than a child?  (At first, in my mind, I thought your post might be in the context of "rescuing" pets upthread)
Yes they do. I have been corrected more than once about using that word ”adopt” about a dog.

Google it. it’s a thing in the adoption community.

Wow. I have to say, this one feels really over the top.

iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #916 on: June 13, 2019, 03:48:12 PM »
I was reminded today that some people are offended by those of us who used the word “adopt” as in “today I adopted a dog.”

What word am I supposed to use?

I have adopted many cats and dogs over my lifetime. I have 0 human children. Believe me, I know the difference between taking in a human child and a dog, that is why I dont have children either from my loins or adopted.

I doubt I will stop using the word “adopt” because it is a pretty good word for this concept and I do not know one that is better. Should I “get” a dog? “Take in” a dog?
Just so I understand better, people object to the word "adopt" being applied to anything other than a child?  (At first, in my mind, I thought your post might be in the context of "rescuing" pets upthread)
Yes they do. I have been corrected more than once about using that word ”adopt” about a dog.

Google it. it’s a thing in the adoption community.

Wow. I have to say, this one feels really over the top.
But now that you know it offends someone, or a group of someones, , will you stop using it?

Paul der Krake

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #917 on: June 13, 2019, 04:04:38 PM »
No.

Kris

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #918 on: June 13, 2019, 07:44:05 PM »
I was reminded today that some people are offended by those of us who used the word “adopt” as in “today I adopted a dog.”

What word am I supposed to use?

I have adopted many cats and dogs over my lifetime. I have 0 human children. Believe me, I know the difference between taking in a human child and a dog, that is why I dont have children either from my loins or adopted.

I doubt I will stop using the word “adopt” because it is a pretty good word for this concept and I do not know one that is better. Should I “get” a dog? “Take in” a dog?
Just so I understand better, people object to the word "adopt" being applied to anything other than a child?  (At first, in my mind, I thought your post might be in the context of "rescuing" pets upthread)
Yes they do. I have been corrected more than once about using that word ”adopt” about a dog.

Google it. it’s a thing in the adoption community.

Wow. I have to say, this one feels really over the top.
But now that you know it offends someone, or a group of someones, , will you stop using it?

I literally have no idea what else to say.

Roadrunner53

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #919 on: June 14, 2019, 05:58:17 AM »
That is just dumb to say the word adopt shouldn't be used in adopting a dog. The word adopt can be used in many ways. Adopt a highway (sponsor), adopt a new policy, adopt a new approach, adopt a new country.

I, for one, will continue to use adopt a dog when referring to acquiring a dog from an animal welfare organization, dog pound or private owner who can no longer keep their dog.

It is a word that can be used in many different ways.

This is a non issue.

Cool Friend

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #920 on: June 14, 2019, 08:49:58 AM »
but you're diminishing what brave, generous heroes they are for adopting children :(

Just say "a dog appeared in my home" instead

iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #921 on: June 14, 2019, 08:57:48 AM »
but you're diminishing what brave, generous heroes they are for adopting children :(

Just say "a dog appeared in my home" instead

Yes, it’s ridiculous.

 I have limited capacity to be schooled to avoid the word of the day that causes the hurt feelings of the day.

Dicey

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #922 on: June 14, 2019, 10:32:37 AM »
but you're diminishing what brave, generous heroes they are for adopting children :(

Just say "a dog appeared in my home" instead

Yes, it’s ridiculous.

 I have limited capacity to be schooled to avoid the word of the day that causes the hurt feelings of the day.
You mean the way some people think "Blind Curve" is offensive to the visually impaired and "Dead End" is offensive to the non-living? Seriously, my city has its own sign shop and no longer uses these terms.

frugalnacho

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #923 on: June 14, 2019, 11:03:00 AM »
Crying about shit always annoys me unless it’s very serious stuff like someone dies.

Yeah.  Fuck those assholes with their feelings.  :P


iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #924 on: June 14, 2019, 11:16:05 AM »
Feelings are not facts. Something to ponder.

iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #925 on: June 14, 2019, 11:22:49 AM »
but you're diminishing what brave, generous heroes they are for adopting children :(

Just say "a dog appeared in my home" instead

Yes, it’s ridiculous.

 I have limited capacity to be schooled to avoid the word of the day that causes the hurt feelings of the day.
You mean the way some people think "Blind Curve" is offensive to the visually impaired and "Dead End" is offensive to the non-living? Seriously, my city has its own sign shop and no longer uses these terms.

You arent kidding here? What do they use in place of Dead End?

Roadrunner53

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #926 on: June 14, 2019, 11:45:13 AM »
"You arent kidding here? What do they use in place of Dead End?"

No way out?

No through road.




Kris

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #927 on: June 14, 2019, 11:52:26 AM »
That is just dumb to say the word adopt shouldn't be used in adopting a dog. The word adopt can be used in many ways. Adopt a highway (sponsor), adopt a new policy, adopt a new approach, adopt a new country.

I, for one, will continue to use adopt a dog when referring to acquiring a dog from an animal welfare organization, dog pound or private owner who can no longer keep their dog.

It is a word that can be used in many different ways.

This is a non issue.

I agree. Especially because I cannot for the life of me see how using "adopt" in one of these other senses harms adopted children or their adopting parents in any way.

Dicey

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #928 on: June 14, 2019, 12:29:01 PM »
"You arent kidding here? What do they use in place of Dead End?"

No way out?

No through road.
No Exit, or Not A Through Road/Street typically, but they have some other silly euphemism that I don't remember just now. Really not kidding, sigh. I wish I was.

robartsd

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #929 on: June 14, 2019, 12:37:13 PM »
24/7/365

It's redundant!
24 hours in one day, every day
7 days in a week, every week
365 days in a year, most years

I don't quite get how that's redundant, exactly. Repetitive, certainly. Cumulative too, but redundant? I don't know...
24/7/365 emphasizes that they're open every day without taking holidays - many 24/7 places don't take holidays but some places do close for a few holidays each year.

Roadrunner53

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #930 on: June 14, 2019, 01:06:40 PM »
That is just dumb to say the word adopt shouldn't be used in adopting a dog. The word adopt can be used in many ways. Adopt a highway (sponsor), adopt a new policy, adopt a new approach, adopt a new country.

I, for one, will continue to use adopt a dog when referring to acquiring a dog from an animal welfare organization, dog pound or private owner who can no longer keep their dog.

It is a word that can be used in many different ways.

This is a non issue.

I agree. Especially because I cannot for the life of me see how using "adopt" in one of these other senses harms adopted children or their adopting parents in any way.


Agreed Kris. People who dwell on this word should get a hobby. Every single animal welfare organization uses this word when they are trying to get the word out that there are many homeless dogs that could use a good home and will help arrange adoptions for these animals. People, get a grip adoption is just a word. Maybe change the adoption word for aquiring a baby. Embrace a baby into the household. Embracement process.

robartsd

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #931 on: June 14, 2019, 03:58:37 PM »
"You arent kidding here? What do they use in place of Dead End?"

No way out?

No through road.
No Exit, or Not A Through Road/Street typically, but they have some other silly euphemism that I don't remember just now. Really not kidding, sigh. I wish I was.
"No Outlet"

Dicey

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #932 on: June 14, 2019, 05:33:20 PM »
"You arent kidding here? What do they use in place of Dead End?"

No way out?

No through road.
No Exit, or Not A Through Road/Street typically, but they have some other silly euphemism that I don't remember just now. Really not kidding, sigh. I wish I was.
"No Outlet"
That's it! It always makes me laugh. Like it's saying there is no place to buy cheap stuff on that street.

Travis

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #933 on: June 14, 2019, 06:19:59 PM »
One of my subordinates starts every sentence with "obviously."  If that alone wasn't enough to drive me nuts, he's constantly getting himself stuck or in trouble and starts his apologizes with that word.  Um, no guy. If it was obvious we wouldn't be talking about it.

iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #934 on: June 15, 2019, 10:26:06 AM »


...I cannot for the life of me see how using "adopt" in one of these other senses harms adopted children or their adopting parents in any way....

It harms them because it makes them feel the equivalent of a dog. Feelings matter. Reference the many posts on other recent and similar threads.

As it happens, I agree with you. But if somebody in your face or, as happened to me, tells you that the word “adopt” in conjunction with a dog adoption is not cool with her and the adoption community, what would you do?


arebelspy

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #935 on: June 15, 2019, 10:44:48 AM »
...I cannot for the life of me see how using "adopt" in one of these other senses harms adopted children or their adopting parents in any way....

It harms them because it makes them feel the equivalent of a dog. Feelings matter. Reference the many posts on other recent and similar threads.

As it happens, I agree with you. But if somebody in your face or, as happened to me, tells you that the word “adopt” in conjunction with a dog adoption is not cool with her and the adoption community, what would you do?

I know you weren't asking me, but personally, as a rule with something like that: I would ask them for alternative phrases, and try to remember not to use it around them.

Whether I stopped using it generally or not would depend on how widespread that offense was, and/or how much harm it did.

See, for example, using the word "retarded" as an insult/to describe something you don't like. Very offensive to many, and harmful. I don't use it. "Adoption" is not, in my opinion and experience, at that level--this thread was the first I'd heard of it--but if it got there, I'd stop using it except for human adoption.

Even if it wasn't to that level, I'd still try not to use it around the person that was offended by it, if they gave me reasonable alternatives. What benefit do I gain by hurting them? What harm does it cause me using a different word or phrase that they don't find offensive?
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Roadrunner53

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #936 on: June 15, 2019, 12:39:17 PM »


...I cannot for the life of me see how using "adopt" in one of these other senses harms adopted children or their adopting parents in any way....

It harms them because it makes them feel the equivalent of a dog. Feelings matter. Reference the many posts on other recent and similar threads.

As it happens, I agree with you. But if somebody in your face or, as happened to me, tells you that the word “adopt” in conjunction with a dog adoption is not cool with her and the adoption community, what would you do?

Adoption is a word. No one is comparing adopting a kid to adopting a dog. It is the legal process of acquiring a new family member and most people think of their dogs as family. Adopting a child or an animal requires a lot of paperwork and investigation into placing the child or animal into the right household. So the process is similar. https://www.lawyers.com/legal-info/criminal/animal-law/what-you-need-to-know-when-adopting-a-pet.html  Not all children or animals are the right fit and these agencies delve into the application to determine needs of the family unit.

Uturn

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #937 on: June 18, 2019, 06:00:38 AM »


...I cannot for the life of me see how using "adopt" in one of these other senses harms adopted children or their adopting parents in any way....

It harms them because it makes them feel the equivalent of a dog.

As an adopted child, I find absolutely no objection to using the word adopt when talking about a pet.  Not only that, I find it silly that some do.  As far as being equated to a dog, have you seen how people treat their dogs nowadays?  In my pre-adopted days, I would have loved to be treated like today's dog. 

Watchmaker

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #938 on: June 18, 2019, 02:28:40 PM »
I was reminded today that some people are offended by those of us who used the word “adopt” as in “today I adopted a dog.”

What word am I supposed to use?

I have adopted many cats and dogs over my lifetime. I have 0 human children. Believe me, I know the difference between taking in a human child and a dog, that is why I dont have children either from my loins or adopted.

I doubt I will stop using the word “adopt” because it is a pretty good word for this concept and I do not know one that is better. Should I “get” a dog? “Take in” a dog?
Just so I understand better, people object to the word "adopt" being applied to anything other than a child?  (At first, in my mind, I thought your post might be in the context of "rescuing" pets upthread)
Yes they do. I have been corrected more than once about using that word ”adopt” about a dog.

Google it. it’s a thing in the adoption community.

Here’s the first instance in my Google search:

https://adoption.com/forums/thread/383035/the-term-quot-adoption-quot-for-pets/

Maybe there are other places where people have criticized the use of adoption more voraciously, but when I read the comments at that link, it just came across as reasonable people discussing their feelings about words within their own community.

"somehow when I see the term used in this type of manner it's a little cringeworthy. Maybe I need to just lighten up, and just go out and get a rhinestone studded pink collar for myself."

"If it bothers you then gently let those you know to try to use another term. I have no issue with it at all and have adopted many new buddies over the years - I don't care to call them pets - that bothers me - so each to their own (I'm adopted as well)."

"On the other hand, adoption means to take as ones own. Therefore, we adopt both pets and positions on issues.
I have heard this before but I think it is too much of an attempt to control others to say do not use a perfectly legitimate word, because it has a synonym that I'm sensitive about."

""Adopt" a pet has never bothered me."


Roadrunner53

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #939 on: June 18, 2019, 03:40:38 PM »
OMG, adopt is a just a word!

I feed my dog. I feed my kids.
I play ball with my dog. I play games with my kids.
I take my dog for a walk around the neighborhood. I take my kids for a walk around the block.
My dog is smart. My kid is smart.
I taught my dog to be obedient. I taught my kid good manners.

These are all words, so we should not use feed, play, take, smart, taught either because you can use them to describle what you do with kids?

Adopt is just a word. It is a good word. Most adoptions, whether it is a kid or a dog, are a great experience and people open their hearts to adopted beings.

ysette9

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #940 on: June 18, 2019, 06:31:14 PM »
I find “adopt” to make sense for a pet, but simultaneously find it odd. For humans adoption is usually presented as an alternative way of starting a family that contrasts with creating offspring that share your genetic material. So in that sense adopting a dog makes sense as you don’t share genetic material, but it raises the question of “adopting versus....”? And that is where my brain stalls.

RetiredAt63

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #941 on: June 18, 2019, 07:58:10 PM »
I find “adopt” to make sense for a pet, but simultaneously find it odd. For humans adoption is usually presented as an alternative way of starting a family that contrasts with creating offspring that share your genetic material. So in that sense adopting a dog makes sense as you don’t share genetic material, but it raises the question of “adopting versus....”? And that is where my brain stalls.

"adopting versus...?" . . . .  buying. 

I would adopt a pet from a rescue organization but buy it from a breeder. The choice of words describes the difference in the way the pet was acquired.

iris lily

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #942 on: June 18, 2019, 08:07:44 PM »
I find “adopt” to make sense for a pet, but simultaneously find it odd. For humans adoption is usually presented as an alternative way of starting a family that contrasts with creating offspring that share your genetic material. So in that sense adopting a dog makes sense as you don’t share genetic material, but it raises the question of “adopting versus....”? And that is where my brain stalls.

"adopting versus...?" . . . .  buying. 

I would adopt a pet from a rescue organization but buy it from a breeder. The choice of words describes the difference in the way the pet was acquired.

No, I would use the word “ adopt “ for buying a dog from a breeder. But I really think I just use the word “get “. as in “we are getting a dog” or “we got a dog” Or “we got another dog.”

« Last Edit: June 18, 2019, 08:09:19 PM by iris lily »

MrsWolfeRN

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #943 on: June 19, 2019, 02:42:34 AM »
I find “adopt” to make sense for a pet, but simultaneously find it odd. For humans adoption is usually presented as an alternative way of starting a family that contrasts with creating offspring that share your genetic material. So in that sense adopting a dog makes sense as you don’t share genetic material, but it raises the question of “adopting versus....”? And that is where my brain stalls.

Me too. I'm fine with "adopted" but in some contexts it's a bit weird: "did you adopt the dog?" ""Well, I didn't give birth to it so....."

RetiredAt63

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #944 on: June 19, 2019, 06:06:14 AM »
I find “adopt” to make sense for a pet, but simultaneously find it odd. For humans adoption is usually presented as an alternative way of starting a family that contrasts with creating offspring that share your genetic material. So in that sense adopting a dog makes sense as you don’t share genetic material, but it raises the question of “adopting versus....”? And that is where my brain stalls.

"adopting versus...?" . . . .  buying. 

I would adopt a pet from a rescue organization but buy it from a breeder. The choice of words describes the difference in the way the pet was acquired.

No, I would use the word “ adopt “ for buying a dog from a breeder. But I really think I just use the word “get “. as in “we are getting a dog” or “we got a dog” Or “we got another dog.”
[/quote

Personally I would also most likely just use "get".  But I was trying to think of the circumstances where "adopt" would and would not be the appropriate verb for acquiring a pet.

GuitarStv

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #945 on: June 19, 2019, 08:16:14 AM »
Can we just use the term 'rescue' instead of adopt then?

ketchup

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #946 on: June 19, 2019, 11:28:33 AM »
I find the term TREATS offensive when my coworkers are talking about junk food left out by the coffee.  Treats are for training dogs.

Actually, I'm not offended at all; I just find it funny.  And it lets me feel smugly superior, which is really what life is all about.

marble_faun

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #947 on: June 19, 2019, 11:40:14 AM »
In dog-owner circles, there is a big differentiation in meaning between "buying" and "adopting."  For some it has become a moral/political issue.

There are tons of dogs in shelters that need homes. If they aren't adopted, a lot of them will be euthanized.  You do pay a small fee to the shelter to adopt, but this is not referred to as "buying."

There are also breeders and puppy mills who are producing new dogs to sell, as a for-profit enterprise, sometimes for $2,000+.  Getting a dog from this type of source is referred to as buying.

Technically I suppose buying a dog could be considered "adopting" it in some sense, but people in this world draw a strong line between the two ways of getting dogs.  (A friend of mine was very active in animal rescue work and had a slogan: "Don't breed or buy while shelter pets die.")

tyort1

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #948 on: June 19, 2019, 11:58:01 AM »
In dog-owner circles, there is a big differentiation in meaning between "buying" and "adopting."  For some it has become a moral/political issue.

There are tons of dogs in shelters that need homes. If they aren't adopted, a lot of them will be euthanized.  You do pay a small fee to the shelter to adopt, but this is not referred to as "buying."

There are also breeders and puppy mills who are producing new dogs to sell, as a for-profit enterprise, sometimes for $2,000+.  Getting a dog from this type of source is referred to as buying.

Technically I suppose buying a dog could be considered "adopting" it in some sense, but people in this world draw a strong line between the two ways of getting dogs.  (A friend of mine was very active in animal rescue work and had a slogan: "Don't breed or buy while shelter pets die.")

My parents paid $10k to adopt me back in 1972.  I'm sure it profited the birth mom.  Does that mean I should tell people I was bought?

ketchup

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Re: Words/phrases I wish would go away
« Reply #949 on: June 19, 2019, 12:55:17 PM »
In dog-owner circles, there is a big differentiation in meaning between "buying" and "adopting."  For some it has become a moral/political issue.

There are tons of dogs in shelters that need homes. If they aren't adopted, a lot of them will be euthanized.  You do pay a small fee to the shelter to adopt, but this is not referred to as "buying."

There are also breeders and puppy mills who are producing new dogs to sell, as a for-profit enterprise, sometimes for $2,000+.  Getting a dog from this type of source is referred to as buying.

Technically I suppose buying a dog could be considered "adopting" it in some sense, but people in this world draw a strong line between the two ways of getting dogs.  (A friend of mine was very active in animal rescue work and had a slogan: "Don't breed or buy while shelter pets die.")
Reaaaly don't want to drag this thread off topic but responsible breeders that give a shit are not making money, or at least that's not their goal.  Breeding dogs is not cheap when done right.  We lost money on our last litter, and came out ahead on the previous one (if you only count costs directly related to the litter).  I hand-waved the numbers and that time we made almost $1/hr.   And it's a ton of work and derails your life.  It's a really bad way to make money.

There are plenty of backyard breeders making money cutting corners or "breeding" designer dogs, and they should be condemned, but not every breeder is a piece of shit and not every breeder is doing it for the cash.