Author Topic: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?  (Read 92943 times)

RetiredAt63

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #450 on: September 04, 2017, 10:46:44 AM »
Right now yard sales/thrift stores are off limits.  I am trying to cut down on stuff,not accumulate more. But when you need them they are great (think Tony the Tiger GRREEAAATTTT!)
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dragoncar

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #451 on: September 04, 2017, 06:35:26 PM »
On MMM today:

I just saw a post to OP asking where to buy essential oils (for less).
One poster suggested buying them while on vacation in Bali because they are so cheap there.  !!!
---------------------
Another OP looking for cooking and meal planing tips as they don't really cook much now and want to get rid of $20k in cc debt...   
Posters suggesting all sorts of good ideas, but most involving a need to first purchase an instaPot, crockpots, special to go mugs with lids, etc... 

I don't think the way to save $300 off your food bill because you used to have a spending problem is to first buy an InstaPot $100+.

Especially when it is being bought using credit card funds at high interest rates.

$5 saucepan from target and a stove top. There. Sorted.

To be fair, one person did call them out on not be able to "buy their way out of debt".

There was a time when I read literally every post on this message board.  That was years ago. Now I can barely keep up with my "unreadreplies" threads.  I guess I'm really missing out on new ways to buy essential oils

Goldielocks

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #452 on: September 04, 2017, 07:05:36 PM »
On MMM today:

I just saw a post to OP asking where to buy essential oils (for less).
One poster suggested buying them while on vacation in Bali because they are so cheap there.  !!!
---------------------

To be fair that post was from super frugal Jo-Jo and she didn't say you should go to Bali to get oils but that you should look for them if you are on vacation somewhere as they might be much cheaper. She merely mentioned that she happened to pick some up cheap in Bali while travelling (which she does frugally).

I know, but without the backstory, the post could have been read by the general guest as an endorsement for Bali travel, too, as a way to save money...  espeicially as the OP was simply looking for an answer like "here is a link to make your own"... "go to walmart"... etc.

calimom

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #453 on: September 04, 2017, 10:04:12 PM »
On MMM today:

I just saw a post to OP asking where to buy essential oils (for less).
One poster suggested buying them while on vacation in Bali because they are so cheap there.  !!!
---------------------

To be fair that post was from super frugal Jo-Jo and she didn't say you should go to Bali to get oils but that you should look for them if you are on vacation somewhere as they might be much cheaper. She merely mentioned that she happened to pick some up cheap in Bali while travelling (which she does frugally).

I know, but without the backstory, the post could have been read by the general guest as an endorsement for Bali travel, too, as a way to save money...  espeicially as the OP was simply looking for an answer like "here is a link to make your own"... "go to walmart"... etc.
That's true. Lots of new members here that could take her Bali post wrong. Personally I think she should have paid $12k to get her private pilots license, then $100k to buy a small plane, then a few thousand for fuel to fly herself to Bali to but discounted oils. DIY MMM style! Or maybe hit a local Head shop (do they still have those) and but some Patchouli oil cheap ;-).

LOL! Now that's the way to optimize that $12K pilot's license expense! Fly to Bali for some essential oils! (they were thinking of going there anyhow)

Certainly better than the poster who thought a $15K Disney vacation for the family was "a pretty good deal". There are no words.

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #454 on: September 04, 2017, 10:56:15 PM »
There was a time when I read literally every post on this message board.  That was years ago. Now I can barely keep up with my "unreadreplies" threads. 

You really fucked up by posting in the baby chat thread then..

I guess I'm really missing out on new ways to buy essential oils

Aside from looking up what essential oils are (I think I've decided that olive oil counts), I also had to look up some celebrity divorce or other to understand a forum thread

GuitarStv

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #455 on: September 05, 2017, 07:05:21 AM »
On MMM today:

I just saw a post to OP asking where to buy essential oils (for less).
One poster suggested buying them while on vacation in Bali because they are so cheap there.  !!!
---------------------
Another OP looking for cooking and meal planing tips as they don't really cook much now and want to get rid of $20k in cc debt...   
Posters suggesting all sorts of good ideas, but most involving a need to first purchase an instaPot, crockpots, special to go mugs with lids, etc... 

I don't think the way to save $300 off your food bill because you used to have a spending problem is to first buy an InstaPot $100+.

Especially when it is being bought using credit card funds at high interest rates.

$5 saucepan from target and a stove top. There. Sorted.

To be fair, one person did call them out on not be able to "buy their way out of debt".

There was a time when I read literally every post on this message board.  That was years ago. Now I can barely keep up with my "unreadreplies" threads.  I guess I'm really missing out on new ways to buy essential oils

Dude . . . they're called essential because you can't live a life without them.  Obvs.
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dios.del.sol

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #456 on: September 05, 2017, 12:28:05 PM »
I'm grumpy because my latest post generated a whole lot of "You're crazy. That's not realistic. I need my comforts. Blah, blah, blah." I'm about to go over to ERE. More manageable volume of posts and people who will actually challenge me. Bah humbug.

Optimiser

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #457 on: September 05, 2017, 01:04:51 PM »
I'm grumpy because my latest post generated a whole lot of "You're crazy. That's not realistic. I need my comforts. Blah, blah, blah." I'm about to go over to ERE. More manageable volume of posts and people who will actually challenge me. Bah humbug.

I thought about doing the same thing, but it seems kind of dead over there. Maybe I just didn't look around enough.

caracarn

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #458 on: September 05, 2017, 01:06:28 PM »
I'm grumpy because my latest post generated a whole lot of "You're crazy. That's not realistic. I need my comforts. Blah, blah, blah." I'm about to go over to ERE. More manageable volume of posts and people who will actually challenge me. Bah humbug.
OK, looking at your post it seems you asked for people to agree with you (at least in the way it's worded) and then are upset because they did?!  Were you testing the waters to see if the community had gone soft so you intentionally set out a topic that ended with "Seems like a good expense to me!"?

StarBright

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #459 on: September 05, 2017, 01:07:21 PM »
This thread was timely. My DH decided he is more on board than he used to be right around when I started reading this.

I'll never be hardcore but this puts me in a place to be hardercore than usual.

caracarn

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #460 on: September 05, 2017, 01:07:43 PM »
I'm grumpy because my latest post generated a whole lot of "You're crazy. That's not realistic. I need my comforts. Blah, blah, blah." I'm about to go over to ERE. More manageable volume of posts and people who will actually challenge me. Bah humbug.

I thought about doing the same thing, but it seems kind of dead over there. Maybe I just didn't look around enough.
The grass is always greener somewhere else until you get there.  Then again on the ERE forum the grass may be dead because they do nothing to care for it, or perhaps they felt grass was too much of an expense.

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #461 on: September 05, 2017, 01:08:42 PM »
I'm grumpy because my latest post generated a whole lot of "You're crazy. That's not realistic. I need my comforts. Blah, blah, blah." I'm about to go over to ERE. More manageable volume of posts and people who will actually challenge me. Bah humbug.

I thought about doing the same thing, but it seems kind of dead over there. Maybe I just didn't look around enough.

Start a thread here! "The ERE side of MMM" type thing. I bet you would attract a lot of interested parties. Just make clear that it's for people who lean more that way, if you like your creature comforts don't bother joining, and then you've got a good group with similar values to share tips/ideas/thoughts with, within an already active community. (Plus, I think people would lurk and learn things even if they are far from ERE, so it would benefit the forums as a whole!)
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caracarn

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #462 on: September 05, 2017, 01:12:13 PM »
I'm grumpy because my latest post generated a whole lot of "You're crazy. That's not realistic. I need my comforts. Blah, blah, blah." I'm about to go over to ERE. More manageable volume of posts and people who will actually challenge me. Bah humbug.
I had to LMAO when I went over there and saw Jacob's post on the front page from September 4th explaining how $170 pressure cooker was a justified expense for his minimalist kitchen.  Seems even ERE may have gone soft.  As I said, grass is always greener.....until you get there..... and scroll to the bottom of the home page.

dragoncar

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #463 on: September 05, 2017, 01:37:39 PM »
I'm grumpy because my latest post generated a whole lot of "You're crazy. That's not realistic. I need my comforts. Blah, blah, blah." I'm about to go over to ERE. More manageable volume of posts and people who will actually challenge me. Bah humbug.
I had to LMAO when I went over there and saw Jacob's post on the front page from September 4th explaining how $170 pressure cooker was a justified expense for his minimalist kitchen.  Seems even ERE may have gone soft.  As I said, grass is always greener.....until you get there..... and scroll to the bottom of the home page.

dios.del.sol, it seemed like most people responded constructively to your post -- do you just expect nobody to disagree with you?  FWIW I also like sleeping in a bed, and they don't have to be expensive.

caracarn, that ERE post was originally posted a decade ago.  In other words, Jacob has always had that pressure cooker.  I wonder if he still has and uses it 10 years later.  If so, it might very well be justified.  I'm pretty sure he chose it because the manufacturer is dedicated to making the replaceable seals available for eternity.

caracarn

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #464 on: September 05, 2017, 01:47:15 PM »
I'm grumpy because my latest post generated a whole lot of "You're crazy. That's not realistic. I need my comforts. Blah, blah, blah." I'm about to go over to ERE. More manageable volume of posts and people who will actually challenge me. Bah humbug.
I had to LMAO when I went over there and saw Jacob's post on the front page from September 4th explaining how $170 pressure cooker was a justified expense for his minimalist kitchen.  Seems even ERE may have gone soft.  As I said, grass is always greener.....until you get there..... and scroll to the bottom of the home page.

dios.del.sol, it seemed like most people responded constructively to your post -- do you just expect nobody to disagree with you?  FWIW I also like sleeping in a bed, and they don't have to be expensive.

caracarn, that ERE post was originally posted a decade ago.  In other words, Jacob has always had that pressure cooker.  I wonder if he still has and uses it 10 years later.  If so, it might very well be justified.  I'm pretty sure he chose it because the manufacturer is dedicated to making the replaceable seals available for eternity.
Yes, I saw that but on the hardcore end of badassity I do not think that would matter.  Isn't that the point of the bed post to which I responded?  The intent was not to discuss an affordable bed, but to drive to not having a bed (pressure cooker) at all.  I was just pointing out that even on ERE they buy things they would be considered sacrilege.

solon

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #465 on: September 05, 2017, 01:49:32 PM »
Link to Jacob's pressure cooker post?

solon

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #466 on: September 05, 2017, 01:58:57 PM »
Oh, it's a blog post, not a forum post. Found it!

https://earlyretirementextreme.com/the-minimalist-kitchen.html

dragoncar

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #467 on: September 05, 2017, 02:19:51 PM »
Oh, it's a blog post, not a forum post. Found it!

https://earlyretirementextreme.com/the-minimalist-kitchen.html

Also, this:

http://earlyretirementextreme.com/a-tribute-to-my-pressure-cooker.html

(so by now it could be 16 years old, also it could fall under the "I bought it before I developed my full frugality" exception MMM likes to use)

Of course,, there are less expensive pressure cookers out there, including the extremely popular Instant Pot

and in action:

http://earlyretirementextreme.com/cooking-for-6-days-in-30-minutes-for-less-than-4.html
« Last Edit: September 05, 2017, 02:24:39 PM by dragoncar »

CanuckExpat

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #468 on: September 05, 2017, 02:27:59 PM »
I'm slightly confused about the pressure cooker thing. If you want to cook under pressure, what's the alternative, make your own pressure cooker? That seems like a recipe to have something blow up

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #469 on: September 05, 2017, 02:40:23 PM »
I'm slightly confused about the pressure cooker thing. If you want to cook under pressure, what's the alternative, make your own pressure cooker? That seems like a recipe to have something blow up

Right? And they save electricity by shortening the cook time, so they literally do have a break even point, even if you don't count things like "more likely to eat at home while still working a full schedule" and the like.

ERE =/= never buying anything expensive.
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dios.del.sol

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #470 on: September 05, 2017, 02:53:00 PM »
I'm grumpy because my latest post generated a whole lot of "You're crazy. That's not realistic. I need my comforts. Blah, blah, blah." I'm about to go over to ERE. More manageable volume of posts and people who will actually challenge me. Bah humbug.
I had to LMAO when I went over there and saw Jacob's post on the front page from September 4th explaining how $170 pressure cooker was a justified expense for his minimalist kitchen.  Seems even ERE may have gone soft.  As I said, grass is always greener.....until you get there..... and scroll to the bottom of the home page.

dios.del.sol, it seemed like most people responded constructively to your post -- do you just expect nobody to disagree with you?  FWIW I also like sleeping in a bed, and they don't have to be expensive.


Thanks for the reality check. Indignance is now dialed down a few notches. I was reacting to a minority of the posts, but they rubbed me the wrong way. Not a good habit on the interwebs.

Not sure what I was expecting - probably just sentiments along the lines of: "doing things for your SO is smart in the grand scheme". Certainly I wasn't expecting the few posts of the form "X is comfortable, therefore X is justified". Catheters and bedpans anyone?

ERE - I lurk. Never posted. They tend to digress into philosophical rabbit holes quite a bit. I'm not sure I have the time to keep up with their intensity!

Here, though. So hard to keep up with the sheer volume!

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #471 on: September 05, 2017, 04:19:06 PM »
I'm slightly confused about the pressure cooker thing. If you want to cook under pressure, what's the alternative, make your own pressure cooker? That seems like a recipe to have something blow up

Right? And they save electricity by shortening the cook time, so they literally do have a break even point, even if you don't count things like "more likely to eat at home while still working a full schedule" and the like.

ERE =/= never buying anything expensive.

I guess my only (negative) take on the pressure-cooker thing is that these things seem to be a dime-a-dozen at every flea market, swap meet and second-hand store. You don't need to spend $170 on a new shiny model when you can find plenty of functional ones for $20 or less.  Kuhn is a luxury brand within the culinary world - not really having commerical-level durability nor a competitive price point - but pretty to look at.
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Bracken_Joy

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #472 on: September 05, 2017, 05:44:35 PM »
I'm slightly confused about the pressure cooker thing. If you want to cook under pressure, what's the alternative, make your own pressure cooker? That seems like a recipe to have something blow up

Right? And they save electricity by shortening the cook time, so they literally do have a break even point, even if you don't count things like "more likely to eat at home while still working a full schedule" and the like.

ERE =/= never buying anything expensive.

I guess my only (negative) take on the pressure-cooker thing is that these things seem to be a dime-a-dozen at every flea market, swap meet and second-hand store. You don't need to spend $170 on a new shiny model when you can find plenty of functional ones for $20 or less.  Kuhn is a luxury brand within the culinary world - not really having commerical-level durability nor a competitive price point - but pretty to look at.

Okay, that's fair, I didn't know the particulars. I assumed it was an electric version that worked with his RV (didn't he live in an RV for a while?) or a fancy one that works on induction if he uses an induction hob, something like that. I tend to assume the best of people though, and I probably shouldn't so often!
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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #473 on: September 06, 2017, 05:17:16 AM »
I'm slightly confused about the pressure cooker thing. If you want to cook under pressure, what's the alternative, make your own pressure cooker? That seems like a recipe to have something blow up

Right? And they save electricity by shortening the cook time, so they literally do have a break even point, even if you don't count things like "more likely to eat at home while still working a full schedule" and the like.

ERE =/= never buying anything expensive.

I guess my only (negative) take on the pressure-cooker thing is that these things seem to be a dime-a-dozen at every flea market, swap meet and second-hand store. You don't need to spend $170 on a new shiny model when you can find plenty of functional ones for $20 or less.  Kuhn is a luxury brand within the culinary world - not really having commerical-level durability nor a competitive price point - but pretty to look at.

Okay, that's fair, I didn't know the particulars. I assumed it was an electric version that worked with his RV (didn't he live in an RV for a while?) or a fancy one that works on induction if he uses an induction hob, something like that. I tend to assume the best of people though, and I probably shouldn't so often!

My response to it all is "meh".  I'm certainly not an ERE type, and I'll admit to having several expensive component to my fairly compact kitchen. I think its just interesting how the 'power of self-justification' can lead someone to do something that objectively they'd probably be against.  In this case paying ~$200 for something when sub $30 alternatives exist. 
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dragoncar

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #474 on: September 06, 2017, 03:35:14 PM »
I'm slightly confused about the pressure cooker thing. If you want to cook under pressure, what's the alternative, make your own pressure cooker? That seems like a recipe to have something blow up

Right? And they save electricity by shortening the cook time, so they literally do have a break even point, even if you don't count things like "more likely to eat at home while still working a full schedule" and the like.

ERE =/= never buying anything expensive.

I guess my only (negative) take on the pressure-cooker thing is that these things seem to be a dime-a-dozen at every flea market, swap meet and second-hand store. You don't need to spend $170 on a new shiny model when you can find plenty of functional ones for $20 or less.  Kuhn is a luxury brand within the culinary world - not really having commerical-level durability nor a competitive price point - but pretty to look at.

Okay, that's fair, I didn't know the particulars. I assumed it was an electric version that worked with his RV (didn't he live in an RV for a while?) or a fancy one that works on induction if he uses an induction hob, something like that. I tend to assume the best of people though, and I probably shouldn't so often!

My response to it all is "meh".  I'm certainly not an ERE type, and I'll admit to having several expensive component to my fairly compact kitchen. I think its just interesting how the 'power of self-justification' can lead someone to do something that objectively they'd probably be against.  In this case paying ~$200 for something when sub $30 alternatives exist.

Who are you talking about?  If Jacob, I don't know if he's objectively against all unnecessary expenses (or no luxuries ever)

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #475 on: September 13, 2017, 11:22:57 PM »
There was a time when I read literally every post on this message board.  That was years ago. Now I can barely keep up with my "unreadreplies" threads.  I guess I'm really missing out on new ways to buy essential oils

Ditto.

Now I only check in every few months, and do massive skims and "mark all read."

This check in (after a few month gap) I actually marked some of my "unread replies" ones as read without reading them for the first time.

Glad that the forum has grown so much though--a lot of people are kicking ass, and improving their lives. It's great!
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sol

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #476 on: September 13, 2017, 11:34:21 PM »
Glad that the forum has grown so much though--a lot of people are kicking ass, and improving their lives. It's great!

It's a lot less great if you actually still live here.  Virtually everything I used to love about this place is gone, and that includes rebel spies.

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #477 on: September 14, 2017, 12:22:53 AM »
Glad that the forum has grown so much though--a lot of people are kicking ass, and improving their lives. It's great!

It's a lot less great if you actually still live here.  Virtually everything I used to love about this place is gone, and that includes rebel spies.

Awwww <3.

Don't worry, once you FIRE, you find yourself spending way less time here. Just hard to fit it into a FIRE'd life.  You're, what, a year or so away?  :)

There's still some kickass posts when I pop in. Some old members drop off, then newer people come around like Maizeman step up with some awesome analysis.

But it's likely true that the signal to noise ratio is much lower.

A lot more people with a 50% savings rate is better than a much smaller group with a 75% savings rate.

We can all push ourselves to be a little more badass though. Definitely.
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brooklynguy

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #478 on: September 14, 2017, 06:34:09 AM »
But it's likely true that the signal to noise ratio is much lower.

The problem (which has always plagued internet discussion boards that experience growth) is that a decline in the signal-to-noise ratio can become self-reinforcing, because the more the noise starts to drown out the signal, the more likely it becomes for signal-producers to decide that it's no longer worth the effort to contribute.  I hope the forum can continue to grow and remain a place of high value, but it's possible that we're now in the early stages of a full-blown mustachian death spiral.

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #479 on: September 14, 2017, 09:07:19 AM »
But it's likely true that the signal to noise ratio is much lower.

The problem (which has always plagued internet discussion boards that experience growth) is that a decline in the signal-to-noise ratio can become self-reinforcing, because the more the noise starts to drown out the signal, the more likely it becomes for signal-producers to decide that it's no longer worth the effort to contribute.  I hope the forum can continue to grow and remain a place of high value, but it's possible that we're now in the early stages of a full-blown mustachian death spiral.

I also wonder how much can be attributed to being largely without a rudder.  Pete's off doing his thing and rarely even writes blog postings anymore. Arebelspy is busy with his globetrotting and only occasionally pops in.  There's enough traffic for this forum to be keep popping up on google searches but the more senior posters can't make a big dent in the volume of posts being made.

Like any large ship that loses steering we seem to keep heading in roughly the same direction - for a while - but ultimately we just wind up going in large, lazy circles.
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Gondolin

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #480 on: September 14, 2017, 09:56:37 AM »
Quote
early stages of a full-blown mustachian death spiral.

So.... The top is in? Great, I'll call my broker!
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solon

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #481 on: September 14, 2017, 10:21:32 AM »
But it's likely true that the signal to noise ratio is much lower.

The problem (which has always plagued internet discussion boards that experience growth) is that a decline in the signal-to-noise ratio can become self-reinforcing, because the more the noise starts to drown out the signal, the more likely it becomes for signal-producers to decide that it's no longer worth the effort to contribute.  I hope the forum can continue to grow and remain a place of high value, but it's possible that we're now in the early stages of a full-blown mustachian death spiral.

I also wonder how much can be attributed to being largely without a rudder.  Pete's off doing his thing and rarely even writes blog postings anymore. Arebelspy is busy with his globetrotting and only occasionally pops in.  There's enough traffic for this forum to be keep popping up on google searches but the more senior posters can't make a big dent in the volume of posts being made.

Like any large ship that loses steering we seem to keep heading in roughly the same direction - for a while - but ultimately we just wind up going in large, lazy circles.

Excellent analysis! We need Pete and Joe!

(When I was growing up in Louisville, KY, there was a radio show called "The Pete and Joe Morning Show" on WDJX.)

dragoncar

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #482 on: September 14, 2017, 11:06:00 AM »
Quote
early stages of a full-blown mustachian death spiral.

So.... The top is in? Great, I'll call my broker!

Don't try to time the market.  Buy and hold. 

But if you do sell, I'll give you $1/thousand posts

Basenji

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #483 on: September 15, 2017, 08:21:13 AM »
I've noticed a few good facepunches recently. Lhamo gave one in all caps about car payments in a case study. Gave me a warm fuzzy.

I've always refrained from diving into giving advice here, like someone said upthread, because I don't feel like I'm an expert. But maybe I'll chime in on the case studies more to encourage/punch newbies.
« Last Edit: September 15, 2017, 09:18:41 AM by Basenji »

nereo

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #484 on: September 15, 2017, 08:27:30 AM »
I've always refrained from diving into giving advice here, like someone said upthread, because I don't feel like I'm an expert. But maybe I'll chime in on the case studies more to encourage/punch newbies.
Yeah, everyone likes to punch the new kid...
:-P
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slappy

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #485 on: September 15, 2017, 09:03:21 AM »
I've noticed a few good facepunches recently. Llamo gave one in all caps about car payments in a case study. Gave me a warm fuzzy.

I've always refrained from diving into giving advice here, like someone said upthread, because I don't feel like I'm an expert. But maybe I'll chime in on the case studies more to encourage/punch newbies.

I've noticed some lately as well. Frankiesgirl has had some great posts. Another person actually posted a picture of a facepunch.

Dicey

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #486 on: September 15, 2017, 09:12:46 AM »
I've noticed a few good facepunches recently. Llamo gave one in all caps about car payments in a case study. Gave me a warm fuzzy.

I've always refrained from diving into giving advice here, like someone said upthread, because I don't feel like I'm an expert. But maybe I'll chime in on the case studies more to encourage/punch newbies.

I've noticed some lately as well. Frankiesgirl has had some great posts. Another person actually posted a picture of a facepunch.
That's funny. During the same time, I gave a whiny newb a suggestion of a facepunch and she complained to the mods. Several weeks later, she's all but disappeared. When I saw lhamo's CAPS, read FG's pithy responses, and saw the facepunch meme, I cheered.

Don't call the coroner just yet. The collective mind is far from life support.
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lhamo

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #487 on: September 15, 2017, 09:16:03 AM »
Yeah, I've been losing my patience a lot lately.....
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nereo

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #488 on: September 15, 2017, 09:23:06 AM »
Anyone have a link to the posts discussed above with Lhamo & Frankiesgirl?
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Bracken_Joy

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #489 on: September 15, 2017, 09:25:27 AM »
Anyone have a link to the posts discussed above with Lhamo & Frankiesgirl?

Gladly. https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/case-studies/case-study-$800-000-in-debt-and-where-to-start/msg1696431/#msg1696431

I'm forgetting which one had the actual facepunch picture though, but it also was pretty fantastic.
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slappy

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #490 on: September 15, 2017, 09:26:53 AM »
Anyone have a link to the posts discussed above with Lhamo & Frankiesgirl?

I think this has the all caps Lhamo response. It also has the image of a facepunch from one poster.
https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/case-studies/case-study-$800-000-in-debt-and-where-to-start/

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« Last Edit: September 15, 2017, 09:31:31 AM by Basenji »

Goldielocks

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #492 on: September 15, 2017, 09:52:50 AM »
I've noticed a few good facepunches recently. Llamo gave one in all caps about car payments in a case study. Gave me a warm fuzzy.

I've always refrained from diving into giving advice here, like someone said upthread, because I don't feel like I'm an expert. But maybe I'll chime in on the case studies more to encourage/punch newbies.

I've noticed some lately as well. Frankiesgirl has had some great posts. Another person actually posted a picture of a facepunch.
That's funny. During the same time, I gave a whiny newb a suggestion of a facepunch and she complained to the mods. Several weeks later, she's all but disappeared. When I saw lhamo's CAPS, read FG's pithy responses, and saw the facepunch meme, I cheered.

Don't call the coroner just yet. The collective mind is far from life support.

:-)

I too, get my knickers in a knot when someone tells me to put on my big girl pants..... especially if deserved!
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Check2400

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #493 on: September 15, 2017, 12:01:48 PM »
I have been following this post, and explicitly because Bracken_joy called us all out on not helping on case studies I made a point to try and give advice to the poster of the $800,000 referenced below.

The facepunch pic in that thread was great, needed, and done for a purpose.  Lhamo's post was not.  IMO Facepunch is a term used to say the harsh truth in order to teach.  Calling someone unbelievably stupid or insane isn't a facepunch, it is a personal attack that is itself insane or unbelievably stupid. 

Worse, the criticism was off mark, and reflects that lhamo responded with an admitted lack of patience instead of an actual attempt to help.  In two weeks time, this person has paid off massive CC debt, begun selling an investment property to pay off massive personal loans, and is wrapping his head around how to best get out of two terrible car loans.  He is on fire, but in the grand breakdown of his debts, the cars and any cost he may have to spend to get out of those loans is best served addressing his 10%+ personal loan fire, not the car loan.  Once again-this is in two weeks time. 

I'll be the first to admit the gung ho blog/facebook/twitter etc. of that OP is extremely odd (I dunno, maybe he needs to social affirmation to keep going?) but he isn't Beatles, and his sig line explicitly states: Please don't mistake my ignorance for arrogance. 

I think there is a fine line between facepunching someone along the path, and knocking them out.  Indoctrination takes more than a day---blenders not included :)

Lastly, lhamo, I am not trying to pick an internet fight, you're almost exclusively super great and positive, I just think for this particular person's path that Super Saiyan facepunch was premature, but we can agree to disagree!


4alpacas

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #494 on: September 15, 2017, 12:40:07 PM »
The facepunch pic in that thread was great, needed, and done for a purpose.  Lhamo's post was not.  IMO Facepunch is a term used to say the harsh truth in order to teach.  Calling someone unbelievably stupid or insane isn't a facepunch, it is a personal attack that is itself insane or unbelievably stupid. 

Worse, the criticism was off mark, and reflects that lhamo responded with an admitted lack of patience instead of an actual attempt to help.  In two weeks time, this person has paid off massive CC debt, begun selling an investment property to pay off massive personal loans, and is wrapping his head around how to best get out of two terrible car loans.  He is on fire, but in the grand breakdown of his debts, the cars and any cost he may have to spend to get out of those loans is best served addressing his 10%+ personal loan fire, not the car loan.  Once again-this is in two weeks time. 
lhamo's reaction wasn't in response to the original post, but the continued excuses made by the OP.  Also, the rationalization of the expenses was a bit off the wall. I also think the OP took the criticism well (and it appears to have sunk in).

I can't even comment...

And, this is SO non mustachian, but I only did Botox today instead of Botox and filler. Saved several hundred dollars. <ducks the face punches>
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4alpacas

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #495 on: September 15, 2017, 01:44:23 PM »
Yeah, I've been losing my patience a lot lately.....
To be honest I can't blame you. You guys are a lot more patient then me (and doesn't help much that I'm a low expenses FIREee so get extra "WTF?"ish with high expenses people). I tryed to her Bracken Joys request to help with the case studies but couldn't do it. A
Feel free to follow me around the forum and facepunch me.  I <3 low expense people reminding me that I'm burning money.

honeybbq

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #496 on: September 15, 2017, 02:18:46 PM »
Blenders,  Gah...  No one that posted about a vitamix was doing so because they were caring for a person that could not chew...

Actually, that's not true. But you had to make it to the end of the thread.

lhamo

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #497 on: September 15, 2017, 02:43:33 PM »
I have been following this post, and explicitly because Bracken_joy called us all out on not helping on case studies I made a point to try and give advice to the poster of the $800,000 referenced below.

The facepunch pic in that thread was great, needed, and done for a purpose.  Lhamo's post was not.  IMO Facepunch is a term used to say the harsh truth in order to teach.  Calling someone unbelievably stupid or insane isn't a facepunch, it is a personal attack that is itself insane or unbelievably stupid. 

Worse, the criticism was off mark, and reflects that lhamo responded with an admitted lack of patience instead of an actual attempt to help.  In two weeks time, this person has paid off massive CC debt, begun selling an investment property to pay off massive personal loans, and is wrapping his head around how to best get out of two terrible car loans.  He is on fire, but in the grand breakdown of his debts, the cars and any cost he may have to spend to get out of those loans is best served addressing his 10%+ personal loan fire, not the car loan.  Once again-this is in two weeks time. 

I'll be the first to admit the gung ho blog/facebook/twitter etc. of that OP is extremely odd (I dunno, maybe he needs to social affirmation to keep going?) but he isn't Beatles, and his sig line explicitly states: Please don't mistake my ignorance for arrogance. 

I think there is a fine line between facepunching someone along the path, and knocking them out.  Indoctrination takes more than a day---blenders not included :)

Lastly, lhamo, I am not trying to pick an internet fight, you're almost exclusively super great and positive, I just think for this particular person's path that Super Saiyan facepunch was premature, but we can agree to disagree!

You're right -- my post was inappropriate/unhelpful and I have apologized and tried to explain what made me go crazy.  The guy is totally stuck in a sunk cost fallacy.  He didn't want to take the immediate hit on the cars because somehow he doesn't realize that that money is gone, gone gone.  He put off the pain of dealing with the upsidedown lease four years ago, got into an even worse loan, and now somehow thinks that letting that situation drag out for four more years is going to make it ok. 
Wherever you go, there you are

ubermom4

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #498 on: September 15, 2017, 03:39:29 PM »
OP -- thanks for posing the question. I haven't read all of the posts (am still dragging through the blender insanity). Have been here a long time, post seldom but used to learn a lot and enjoy the 'vibe'. Many of the old posters are not as active -- they have moved on (FIRE or something else). I agree with the softening/tolerating complainy pants of the forums. We are surrounded by wimps -- that is why we fled the real world to MMM. To me the issue is best summed up in the diminution of profanity. I believe that MMM had a posting about the importance of profanity. Hey, complaining sheeple/consumer suckas, STFU!

Cali Nonya

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Re: Weird fourm coversations - has the community gone soft?
« Reply #499 on: September 15, 2017, 03:51:52 PM »
https://www.outlookindia.com/newsscroll/intelligent-people-more-likely-to-use-cuss-words-study/1134317

"Scientifically" proven that more intelligent people cuss more.  So maybe we do need a bit more cussing on this forum.
Personally I prefer the stat included in the above article that also imply more intelligent people are more likely to wander around their house naked, though I am not too how that would apply to a forum.