Author Topic: Resume face punch request  (Read 2226 times)

JanF

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Resume face punch request
« on: July 28, 2017, 12:17:38 PM »
I've been trying to apply for new jobs but I haven't received any call backs and I think the issue might be with my resume. I'd like some opinions of why it sucks and what I can do to improve it.

A little about me....I'm 25 and I've always had a job since high school. My current job, office assistant, is my first "adult" job and I've been there for 2 years. My job duties is more like "back up executive assistant" for when the main EA is busy or absent but I'm not sure how to convey that. I've been applying to EA positions and travel agent jobs (but only ones that isn't based on commissions) with hopes of working from home in the future.

Thanks!


Office Assistant
"Company Name"
Arranged business and leisure travel for CEO, his family, and business associates. Research and booked
travel destinations, tours, flights, hotels, cars, prices. Created a travel manual for new hires. Tracked
flights and frequent flyer programs. Screened calls. Scheduled calls and meeting. Updated calendar.
Researched business partners, products, and services.

Assistant Manager/Server
"Company Name"
Managed staff and conflicts with customers. Ensured guest satisfaction. Opened and closed the
restaurant. Communicate with vendors. Prepared food orders. Dealt with money transactions.

Computer Lab Assistant
"College Name"
Prepared classrooms for lessons. Helped students with basic computer issues. Greeted students and
faculties.

Sales Associate, Intern
"Company Name"
Interacted with customers. Answered questions about products and services. Handled money
transactions. Organized and stocked the store.

Assistant International Business Academy Coordinator
"High School Name"
Organized files and paperwork. Ordered office inventory. Delivered paperwork to faculty and students,
and organized visual displays.

Education
B.S. in Criminal Justice. Graduated 2014

Skills
Microsoft Word, Excel, PowerPoint, and Outlook. Google Docs, Sheets, Slides, Calendar, and Gmail. Dropbox. Skype for Business. FreeConferenceCalls (and similar
programs).

Interest
Travel, snowboarding, cooking, reading, research, trying new and different things

Skills Barterer

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #1 on: July 28, 2017, 12:26:30 PM »
Hi!

I have had to hire quite a few people over my career.  What I look for in a resume is that it clearly shows quantified results from your effort.  Also, don't forget you are selling yourself in a one-pager, so what makes you the best possible candidate, and makes the company/person that is reading your resume a complete fool if they don't hire you? 


Miss Piggy

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #2 on: July 28, 2017, 12:52:54 PM »
A few thoughts:

- Are you still at your office assistant job? If so, make some of those verbs present tense (the activities you are still performing).
- Because you have a bachelor's degree, potential employers may think you are overqualified for an executive assistant role, and therefore they're afraid they'd have to pay you more than what they want to pay.
- I'm not sure about listing your interests. Do people really do that on resumes these days?

I see some typos, including:

Quote
Assistant Manager/Server
"Company Name"
Managed staff and conflicts with customers. Ensured guest satisfaction. Opened and closed the
restaurant. Communicate Communicated with vendors. Prepared food orders. Dealt with money transactions.

Computer Lab Assistant
"College Name"
Prepared classrooms for lessons. Helped students with basic computer issues. Greeted students and
faculties  faculty members.


birdiegirl

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #3 on: July 28, 2017, 01:22:44 PM »
Agree with the post above to drop the interests - unless they're relevant to the job leave them off.  You may also want to drop the high school job as well. 

For your current role a couple of thoughts -

Yes, you should include that you are a backup for the EA.  I would consider an EA a higher level than an office assistant.  So including that would show you have experience with that level of work & providing that kind of support to executives.  A bonus is that the words "executive assistant" might help your resume get picked up by companies that using automated software or by the HR staff that is looking for key words as they sort through resumes. 

Also, you should explain more about the impact of your work.  For example, with all the travel research/booking, what was the goal?  Were you doing the research to save the company money?  to coordinate very complex itineraries?  to maximize travel rewards?    Same with the research on business partners, products, and services-  add more description to include the outcome of that research. 

Laura33

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #4 on: July 28, 2017, 01:42:40 PM »
I would suggest tailoring the resume for each specific position, and then writing a cover letter that explains succinctly those broader skills that are harder to put in a resume (like the de facto EA role).  For example, if I were looking for an EA, I would not get past your current job -- that sounds like a travel agent job, and most companies honestly don't need that much of that, because either people do it themselves or they have a corporate travel department/travel agent who does that.  I would be looking for more useful skills, like managing the schedule, word processing/Excel work, effectiveness with customers, and the like. 

I would also be looking for words/experiences that signal a go-get-it attitude, efficiency, organization, goes above and beyond, good under pressure, ability to manage complex situations, attention to detail, etc.  It's like birdiegirl said:  companies are not looking for a warm butt to fill a seat, they want someone who will actively be helping the bottom line, either by bringing in more money or by cutting existing costs/streamlining processes/etc.  So for ex., if you took the initiative to stay up with the various travel deal websites and can say that you reduced the travel spend by $XXXX, that is much, much more useful than just "arranged travel."  Or when you managed the vendors at your old job, did you manage to steer the company toward better/lower-cost ones?  I actually like the "created travel manual" bit, which sounds like you took the time to do something that would help others be more efficient -- but it is buried in the rest of the text!  Pull out a few more concrete examples like that so they can see how you will be working to save them money.  Remember:  you are actually looking for a promotion, a jump up.  To get that job, you will need to persuade your future employer that you are already doing EA-level work better than the 837 other applicants (of whom 274 may already have EA jobs).

Also, make sure all your words count.  A lot of what you have in there doesn't actually mean anything -- "greeted students and faculties"???  That sounds like you looked up from your book when they walked in and said, "hi!"  The signal that kind of thing sends is "I don't actually have any useful skills or relevant experience, but I still have half a page to fill, so I'm going to throw in anything I can."  When in reality I bet you had to manage all of the logistics, make sure you had all the inventory/supplies that you needed, coordinated with the administration/services, managed a gazillion stupid student questions and crashes, and did all of that for XX hours/week on top of your regular courseload.  You're kind of selling yourself short here ("basic" computer questions?).  Also, verbs like "interacted," "communicated," "helped," "dealt with," etc. don't really say anything.  This circles back to the first point:  you need verbs that signal that you took charge of things, herded the cats, controlled, structured, managed, etc.

Finally:  yeah, drop the "interests" -- that's always borderline, but my rule is to keep them in only if they are unique enough to set you apart or make you memorable.  Everyone likes to read and try new things.  Again, if there is something specific that you could change that to -- e.g., not just researching, but say running a travel blog/website in your spare time -- then go ahead, but what is in there now isn't helping you.

Oh, and finally-finally:  if you can't yet come up with those kinds of "helped the bottom-line"/"streamlined the process" specifics, spend the next few months at your current job looking for opportunities to do just that.  At your age and level of experience, no one expects you to have a full page of 800 ways you saved money -- but two or three compelling anecdotes from your current job will help a lot (especially if you can come up with at least one similar example from your prior jobs, e.g., "within 6 months of hire promoted to assistant manager and trusted to close restaurant," or even "never missed a day of work" -- something that signals a good personal characteristic).
Laugh while you can, monkey-boy

JanF

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #5 on: July 28, 2017, 02:31:35 PM »
Quote
Also, you should explain more about the impact of your work.  For example, with all the travel research/booking, what was the goal?  Were you doing the research to save the company money?  to coordinate very complex itineraries?  to maximize travel rewards?    Same with the research on business partners, products, and services-  add more description to include the outcome of that research.

That's a really great point. I'll expand on those and put less on my office duties. How long is too long of a description?

Quote
For example, if I were looking for an EA, I would not get past your current job -- that sounds like a travel agent job, and most companies honestly don't need that much of that, because either people do it themselves or they have a corporate travel department/travel agent who does that.

I think it depends on the companies. My CEO is the outlier since he does international travel nearly every week. But I do plan on having 2 version of my resume, one that's more EA and office oriented and one that's more travel related.

Quote
A lot of what you have in there doesn't actually mean anything -- "greeted students and faculties"???  That sounds like you looked up from your book when they walked in and said, "hi!"  The signal that kind of thing sends is "I don't actually have any useful skills or relevant experience, but I still have half a page to fill, so I'm going to throw in anything I can."

That was exactly what it was LOL Bulls-eye on "I need to fill out this page with stuff" It was a work-study grant and basically I just manned the front desk and clean after the professors were done with the classrooms

JanF

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #6 on: July 28, 2017, 02:35:39 PM »
What is your opinion of paragraph vs bullet points?

Miss Piggy

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #7 on: July 28, 2017, 02:44:17 PM »
Definitely bullets. And make sure they are parallel. Businesspeople don't seem to read paragraphs anymore.

Laura33

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #8 on: July 28, 2017, 03:07:32 PM »
Bullets.  E.g.,

Office Assistant
"Company Name"
20XX-present

- Serve as backup/overflow Executive Assistant
- Manage all aspects of rapidly-changing executive schedule
- Developed travel manual to streamline corporate bookings
- Overhauled vendor relationships to cut supply costs by XX%

Etc.  Short.  Punchy.  Think about the depth of a decent powerpoint bullet, each of which should convey a specific achievement, responsibility, and/or positive character trait (in descending order of preference).
Laugh while you can, monkey-boy

JanF

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #9 on: August 05, 2017, 11:14:33 PM »
It's been a while but I finally have time to fix it up! Let me know what you think. I'll have 2 different versions of my resume, and the only difference is my office description is travel or office related depending on what I'm applying for.


Office Assistant – Travel version
"Company Name"
Serve as backup/overflow Executive Assistant.
Arrange complex travel itineraries for the CEO that involved back to back meetings in different continents.
Research and book the most cost-effective travel arrangements for CEO’s family and friends.
Research and track hotels and car rental prices for best rate and value.
Research and interview tour guides to find someone who can provide the best travel experiences.
Communicate with airline staff to arrange alternative flights for CEO when there are delays.
Keep track and update of over 20 frequent flyer and hotel loyalty accounts.
Developed travel manual to streamline corporate bookings.
Train new employees on travel procedures.

Office Assistant – EA version
"Company Name"
Serve as backup/overflow Executive Assistant.
Manage all aspects of rapidly-changing executive schedule.
Schedule and manage staff for the office.
Manage CEO’s trips to help lower cost by price tracking.
Developed travel manual to streamline corporate bookings.
Developed phone “cheat sheet” and train employees on new phone system.
Train new employees on office procedures (phones, emails, CEO’s travels).

Assistant Manager/Server
"Company Name"
Managed staff to ensure food safety compliance and timely and excellent service.
Solved customers’ issues while maintaining customer satisfaction and restaurant bottom lines.
Physically managed the restaurant on owner’s behalf (opening, closing, receiving inventory, paying vendors).

Computer Lab Assistant
"College Name"
Assisted students and faculty with basic tasks and inquiries.
Set up and clean classrooms for lectures.
Manage front office reception area by cleaning and organizing desk and visitor lobby.

Sales Associate, promoted from Intern
"Company Name"
Organized shelves and store displays to reflect current promotions.
Assisted customers with inquiries, purchases, and returns.
Approached customers and made recommendations based on their interest.

Education
B.S. in Criminal Justice. Graduated 2014

Skills
Microsoft Office. Google Docs, Sheets, Slides, Calendar, and Gmail. Dropbox. Skype for Business. FreeConferenceCalls (and similar programs).


marty998

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #10 on: August 06, 2017, 04:53:14 AM »
If you have a degree in Criminal Justice, why are you applying for secretarial type roles?

Do you have no interest in working in that field?

GuitarStv

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #11 on: August 06, 2017, 09:17:12 AM »
It's been a while but I finally have time to fix it up! Let me know what you think. I'll have 2 different versions of my resume, and the only difference is my office description is travel or office related depending on what I'm applying for.


Office Assistant – Travel version
"Company Name"
Serve as backup/overflow Executive Assistant.
Arrange complex travel itineraries for the CEO that involved back to back meetings in different continents.
Research and book the most cost-effective travel arrangements for CEO’s family and friends.
Research and track hotels and car rental prices for best rate and value.
Research and interview tour guides to find someone who can provide the best travel experiences.
Communicate with airline staff to arrange alternative flights for CEO when there are delays.
Keep track and update of over 20 frequent flyer and hotel loyalty accounts.
Developed travel manual to streamline corporate bookings.
Train new employees on travel procedures.

Office Assistant – EA version
"Company Name"
Serve as backup/overflow Executive Assistant.
Manage all aspects of rapidly-changing executive schedule.
Schedule and manage staff for the office.
Manage CEO’s trips to help lower cost by price tracking.
Developed travel manual to streamline corporate bookings.
Developed phone “cheat sheet” and train employees on new phone system.
Train new employees on office procedures (phones, emails, CEO’s travels).

Assistant Manager/Server
"Company Name"
Managed staff to ensure food safety compliance and timely and excellent service.
Solved customers’ issues while maintaining customer satisfaction and restaurant bottom lines.
Physically managed the restaurant on owner’s behalf (opening, closing, receiving inventory, paying vendors).

Computer Lab Assistant
"College Name"
Assisted students and faculty with basic tasks and inquiries.
Set up and clean classrooms for lectures.
Manage front office reception area by cleaning and organizing desk and visitor lobby.

Sales Associate, promoted from Intern
"Company Name"
Organized shelves and store displays to reflect current promotions.
Assisted customers with inquiries, purchases, and returns.
Approached customers and made recommendations based on their interest.

Education
B.S. in Criminal Justice. Graduated 2014

Skills
Microsoft Office. Google Docs, Sheets, Slides, Calendar, and Gmail. Dropbox. Skype for Business. FreeConferenceCalls (and similar programs).



Your resume as it stands isn't terrible, but it doesn't make you stand out in any way.  I would not personally bring you in for an interview, let along hire you after reading it over.  These are the reasons why:

- Start the resume with a short/simple mission statement about what your best qualities are and why you'll be good at the job you're targeting.  This is a 1-2 line teaser to highlight what you bring to an employer that's awesome.

- Two different paragraphs are OK . . . but I think that you should have two completely separate resumes, one that targets a travel job only and one that targets an executive assistant job only.  Dig up shit from those old jobs that is beneficial to the job you're applying for.

- Skills should have years of experience next to them, and your work experience should reflect where the skills were used.

- "(and similar programs)" is lazy.  List them if you have experience with them, or don't list them at all.  Don't make the person reading your resume guess.

- I find that it usually makes more sense to put your skills before your work experience.

- Your have descriptions of what you did for your past jobs . . . but you don't really say what you did well.  You don't say why this should matter to the person currently reading the resume.  Give examples that specifically show qualities you want to tell the employer about.  Are you good with people?  Are you enthusiastic and hard working?  Are you detail and technical oriented?  These are words that should be in your mission statement at the top of the resume.  The job description section should prove through your experience that you weren't just blowing smoke up my ass.

- Don't just claim to have done things, back it up with hard data and examples:

  Don't say "Research and book the most cost-effective travel arrangements for CEO’s family and friends."
  Say "Researched and booked the most cost-effective travel arrangements for CEO’s family and friends, saving on average 20% per trip."

  Don't say "Arrange complex travel itineraries for the CEO that involved back to back meetings in different continents."
  Say "Arranged complex travel itineraries for the CEO that involved back to back meetings in five different countries and twelve cities on different continents over a one week time frame."

  Don't say "Research and track hotels and car rental prices for best rate and value."
  Say "Developed a spreadsheet and tracking metrics that covered both online prices and followed reward programs/coupons to always ensure that the best rate and value for hotel and car rental prices could be found instantly.

etc.

- Pick a tense and stay with it!  "Arrange (present tense) complex travel itineraries for the CEO that involved (past tense) back to back meetings in different continents."  FWIW - my preference would be to use past tense throughout your resume.  These are old jobs/duties your are describing and you are aiming for a new one.

- You list Microsoft Office in your skills list.  How much experience do you really have managing relational databases in Access?  Be specific about what you have experience with (Word, Excel, Powerpoint, etc.).  This avoids awkward questions in interviews.

- There's no problem including interests and hobbies on a resume.  The interests and hobbies must be related to the job you're looking for though.  Employers don't care about who you are as a person . . . only about what you can do for the company.  An interest in travel (for example) could well be useful if you want to work in a travel company, as long as you explain why:
I have an interest in travel - useless on a resume
I enjoy the planning aspect of travel and have first hand experience developing itineraries, booking flights/trains/buses and dealing with different languages/customs - beneficial on a resume




That's just my two cents though.
« Last Edit: August 06, 2017, 09:19:51 AM by GuitarStv »

JanF

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #12 on: August 06, 2017, 02:20:05 PM »
Thanks GuitarStv that helps a lot! I do have summary of my skills in my resume, let me know what you think:
"Highly detail oriented assistant with over 7 years in customer behavior prediction. Skilled at working with others and taking leadership roles while maintaining high level of professionalism and rationality."

Quote
but I think that you should have two completely separate resumes, one that targets a travel job only and one that targets an executive assistant job only.  Dig up shit from those old jobs that is beneficial to the job you're applying for.

that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm only 25 so I don't have a long list of jobs basically this office job is the first "real" job I have and everything else is an income supplement between high school and college. I'm not sure how to make my server job relate to travel other than mentioning customer service (In 4 years, I've never dragged someone out of a restaurant? hahaha)

Quote
Pick a tense and stay with it!

So my current job description should also be past tense?

Do you think it's ok to have 1.5 pages for resume? I had to take out a couple of jobs (not that important but I wanted to show that I've never had a gap between jobs)


Quote
If you have a degree in Criminal Justice, why are you applying for secretarial type roles?

Do you have no interest in working in that field?

Few reasons but basically I was interested in criminal psychology but I find it difficult to get there without getting a Ph.D or starting at the bottom as police officer type jobs (which I have no interest in). Since I made the typical millennial mistake of going to college for the wrong degree and came out with a bunch of debt (almost gone thanks to MMM!). I wasn't interested in pursuing more debt. I also came to the realization that I don't need to pursue a career, I rather do jobs that I'm interested in which is currently travel.

Freedomin5

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #13 on: August 06, 2017, 08:05:19 PM »
The biggest thing that stands out for me is the lack of numbers / hard data. (See below for sample)

And definitely keep your resume to one page. This EA job is only your first real job. There should be no reason to need more than one page.

Also, if you're applying to jobs online, you need to make sure that you are copying key words from the job description directly into your resume. Otherwise, the system may filter out your resume because it doesn't "match" their job description.

You also need to include the length of time you were at each position. Otherwise, it looks like you were at 4 jobs in the span of 3 years, which may look a bit like job hopping.

It's been a while but I finally have time to fix it up! Let me know what you think. I'll have 2 different versions of my resume, and the only difference is my office description is travel or office related depending on what I'm applying for.


Office Assistant – Travel version
"Company Name"
Serve as backup/overflow Executive Assistant.
Arrange complex travel itineraries for the CEO that involved back to back meetings in on different continents.
Research and book the most cost-effective travel arrangements for CEO’s family and friends with average cost savings of $500 per trip.
Research and track hotels and car rental prices for best rate and value resulting in 20% decrease in travel spending in 2016 fiscal year.
Research and interview over 10 tour guides in a two-week periodto find someone who can provide the best travel experiences, resulting in 10% increase in recent customer satisfaction poll.
Communicate with airline staff to arrange alternative flights for CEO when there are delays. Promptly and creatively problem-solved by researching and arranging alternative flights in an efficient manner in time-sensitive situations
Keep track and update of over 20 frequent flyer and hotel loyalty accounts with point usage leading to a $5000 reduction in travel expenses
Developed travel manual to streamline corporate bookings improving efficiency of new staff
Train threenew employees on travel procedures and evaluated work performance

Office Assistant – EA version
"Company Name"
Serve as backup/overflow Executive Assistant.
Manage all aspects of rapidly-changing executive schedule.
Schedule and manage staff for the office.
Manage CEO’s trips to help lower cost by price tracking.
Developed travel manual to streamline corporate bookings.
Developed phone “cheat sheet” and train employees on new phone system.
Train new employees on office procedures (phones, emails, CEO’s travels).

Assistant Manager/Server
"Company Name"
Managed staff to ensure food safety compliance and timely and excellent service.
Solved customers’ issues while maintaining customer satisfaction and restaurant bottom lines.
Physically managed the restaurant on owner’s behalf (opening, closing, receiving inventory, paying vendors).

Computer Lab Assistant
"College Name"
Assisted students and faculty with basic tasks and inquiries.
Set up and clean classrooms for lectures.
Manage front office reception area by cleaning and organizing desk and visitor lobby.

Sales Associate, promoted from Intern
"Company Name"
Organized shelves and store displays to reflect current promotions.
Assisted customers with inquiries, purchases, and returns.
Approached customers and made recommendations based on their interest.

Education
B.S. in Criminal Justice. Graduated 2014

Skills
Microsoft Office. Google Docs, Sheets, Slides, Calendar, and Gmail. Dropbox. Skype for Business. FreeConferenceCalls (and similar programs).

mustachepungoeshere

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #14 on: August 07, 2017, 12:08:49 AM »
I highly recommend reading anything written by Alison Green of Ask a Manager on this topic.

http://www.askamanager.org/2017/05/if-youre-not-getting-interviews-heres-how-to-fix-your-resume-and-cover-letter.html

GuitarStv

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #15 on: August 07, 2017, 06:30:15 AM »
Thanks GuitarStv that helps a lot! I do have summary of my skills in my resume, let me know what you think:
"Highly detail oriented assistant with over 7 years in customer behavior prediction. Skilled at working with others and taking leadership roles while maintaining high level of professionalism and rationality."

That sounds good.  The rest of your resume should be spent proving these key points.  (You need to better explain the leadership roles in the rest of your resume - currently there is not enough.)


Quote
but I think that you should have two completely separate resumes, one that targets a travel job only and one that targets an executive assistant job only.  Dig up shit from those old jobs that is beneficial to the job you're applying for.

that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm only 25 so I don't have a long list of jobs basically this office job is the first "real" job I have and everything else is an income supplement between high school and college. I'm not sure how to make my server job relate to travel other than mentioning customer service (In 4 years, I've never dragged someone out of a restaurant? hahaha)

Think of any kind of similarity between the job you're applying for and the job experience you have.  Customer service (have you ever had to deal with a rude/unruly customer?), detail oriented (did you have to memorize a rotating list of menu items?  Remembering complex orders?), judgement/understanding of behaviour (were you able to size up a customer to make predictive meal/drink suggestions?), enthusiasm, etc.  These are all possible areas of overlap.


Quote
Pick a tense and stay with it!

So my current job description should also be past tense?

This is a very small mental thing, but you want the employer to know in the back of their mind that you're already seeing yourself at the new job . . . not your old job.  I'd use past tense.  Much more important than that though, don's switch tenses in the middle of a sentence!  That just reads weird.


Do you think it's ok to have 1.5 pages for resume? I had to take out a couple of jobs (not that important but I wanted to show that I've never had a gap between jobs)

I don't believe in hard rules regarding length.  Some guys I interview have five page resumes where every point is valid to the job being applied for.

A good rule of thumb for a resume is that you make it as long as it needs to be.  You don't want 1.2 pages, so play with the formatting to ensure that it fills at least 60% of each page that it takes up.  The caveat with this though, is that every sentence in the resume should serve a purpose (don't just throw things in there to take up space - it's not impressive, it reflects poorly on your judgement).  Generally speaking, the regular length of resume for people without much career experience is 1/2 pages.  For people with lots of experience it's usually 2/3, but can be pretty long depending on the job.

JanF

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #16 on: August 07, 2017, 10:13:48 AM »
Quote
You also need to include the length of time you were at each position. Otherwise, it looks like you were at 4 jobs in the span of 3 years, which may look a bit like job hopping.
I do have time and location on my actual resume but for the purpose of posting on this forum I omitted them ;)


What do I do if I don't have a lot of hard numbers? I feel like any numbers I come up with are in the "technically correct" range but the numbers wouldn't apply in other companies

Research and book the most cost-effective travel arrangements for CEO’s family and friends with average cost savings of $500 per trip.
They technically save money because they use the CEO's upgrades and I book the flights for them and they pay us back

Research and track hotels and car rental prices for best rate and value resulting in 20% decrease in travel spending in 2016 fiscal year.
I technically do these and I do find better rates for cars but he ends up taking uber or going with the more expensive option because they give him nicer cars

Research and interview over 10 tour guides in a two-week periodto find someone who can provide the best travel experiences, resulting in 10% increase in recent customer satisfaction poll.
I don't feel comfortable saying something like that since it would be a straight up lie

Communicate with airline staff to arrange alternative flights for CEO when there are delays. Promptly and creatively problem-solved by researching and arranging alternative flights in an efficient manner in time-sensitive situations

I like this. My biggest weakness is that I have a really hard time fluffy up feathers and making every sound better than it actually is (no PR/marketing jobs for me!).

Keep track and update of over 20 frequent flyer and hotel loyalty accounts with point usage leading to a $5000 reduction in travel expenses

Laura33

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #17 on: August 07, 2017, 11:41:37 AM »
1.  Don't lie.  But it is ok to be literally true.  E.g., if you found all these great deals, and then the CEO decided to do something another way, you can say you "identified" $XXX in cost savings.

2.  This is the opposite of "fluffy" -- we are asking you to be concrete.  You are sending your resumes to business people.  Businesses speak money.  They absolutely know that a specific achievement at one place will not guarantee the exact same achievement at another place.  What they are looking for is evidence that you have the skills and the desire to ferret out deals to save them money. 

The reality is that everyone presents themselves as smart! talented! driven! a great asset!!  The way you demonstrate that you are the one out of 250 they should hire is by showing they you have already done what they want in your current job.  Numbers, numbers, numbers.  E.g., can "CEO and friends/family" become "parties of XX people."

The revised draft is much better, but you still have a fair bit of fluffy/meaningless words that just fill space.  "Approached" customers says nothing -- presumably, all salespeople need to approach their customers to make a sale, right?  So what sets you apart from everyone else?  If you can say you were a top seller, that will show a compelling business skill; or if you can say "promoted from intern due to strong sales results/customer feedback/etc.," that shows that you did the job well and were promoted as a result.  If you can't say anything like that, just delete that line entirely and streamline that entry to one bullet point to help everything fit on one page ("responsible for all aspects of customer relations"?). 

And for the love of God, please remove the "basic" in the computer lab job!  You don't have to resort to puffery, but please stop actively belittling yourself!  You can just say you organized and maintained the facilities and resolved faculty and student problems -- no one expects a college work-study job to mean much anyway.

Which is actually a good final point:  emphasize the most relevant experience by devoting more space to it.  Lab assistant and sales associate can be one-line entries; the restaurant job can be a few lines, because that management experience is relevant to your leadership/problem-solving abilities; and then you should devote the most space to the current job (again, focusing on punched-up examples, not just adding words to fill space)

Laugh while you can, monkey-boy

JanF

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #18 on: August 08, 2017, 01:04:46 AM »
I think I owe you lovely people a choice of alcoholic beverage :)


Summary:
Highly detail oriented assistant with over 7 years in customer service and behavior prediction. Skilled at critical thinking, working with others, and switching between leadership and supporting roles while maintaining high level of professionalism and rationality.

Skills
Microsoft Word, Excel, PowerPoint (10+ years). Google Docs, Sheets, Slides, Calendar, and Gmail (7+ years). Dropbox (3+ years). Skype for Business (2+ years). FreeConferenceCalls (2+ years).

Office Assistant – Travel version
"Company Name"
•   Served as backup/overflow Executive Assistant.
•   Arranged complex travel itineraries for the CEO that involved traveling to Manila, Puerto Princesa, Cebu, Luang Prabang, Yangon, Madagascar, Botswana, and Mozambique over a 2-week period.
•   Coordinated CEO’s family trip to 2016 Summer Olympics that involved driving up to 16 people to various events each day, kept incoming and outgoing inventory of over $250k worth of event tickets, tracked refund status of unused tickets spread over 10 different purchasing accounts.
•   Calculated and book the most cost-effective travel arrangements for CEO’s family and friends, saving them about 30% per trip.
•   Analyzed and track hotels and car rental prices for best rate and value, identified 15% in savings.
•   Investigated and interview tour guides to find someone who can provide the best travel experiences. thinking about leaving it out
•   Promptly and creatively problem-solved by researching and arranging alternative flights in an efficient manner in time-sensitive situations.
•   Overhauled travel manual to streamline corporate bookings and updated new policies for future staff.
•   Trained 2 new employees on travel procedures.

Office Assistant – EA version
"Company Name"
•   Served as backup/overflow Executive Assistant.
•   Set up and maintained the CEO’s calendar which helped other staff coordinated meetings and calls.
•   Scheduled and managed staff for the office according to CEO’s travels and office meetings.
•   Screened incoming calls based on level of importance and relevance and routed them to the appropriate executive.
•   Converted documents to bypass password encryption and file formats to revise a contract, saved CEO time from waiting for a new revision.
•   Edited PowerPoint presentations for business meetings for format, accurate grammar and numbers.
•   Overhauled travel manual to streamline corporate bookings and updated new policies for future staff.
•   Developed phone “cheat sheet” and train all employees on new phone system.
•   Trained new employees on office procedures (phones, emails, CEO’s travels).

Assistant Manager/Server
"Company Name"
•   Physically managed the restaurant on owner’s behalf (opening, closing, staff training, receiving inventory, paying vendors).
•   Lead the cooks and expeditors in food preparation and presentation with over 95% accuracy rate
•   Managed servers to ensure food safety compliance and timely and excellent service.
•   Accurately served 30 sports team members and their family sitting at different tables by matching jersey numbers of the kids of their parents which helped with accurate food delivery and correct billing.
•   Up-sell appetizers, specialty beverages, and desserts to increase guest check averages.
•   Confronted customers about agitated dogs to maintain a safe and fun environment for staff and customers.
•   Correctly predicted customers’ wants and needs. Resulted in increase efficiency, faster table turnaround, and higher tips.
•   Assisted host area as needed to avoid service bottleneck and loss of potential revenue.

Computer Lab Assistant
"College Name"
•   Assisted students and faculty with daily tasks and inquiries.
•   Set up and clean classrooms for lectures.
•   Manage front office reception area by cleaning and organizing desk and visitor lobby.

•   Sales Associate, promoted from Intern
"Company Name"
•   Organized shelves and store displays to reflect current promotions.
•   Assisted customers with inquiries, purchases, and returns.
•   Approached customers and made recommendations based on their interest.

Education
B.S. in Criminal Justice. Graduated 2014



2Cent

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #19 on: August 08, 2017, 05:36:36 AM »
Just print it out and look at it from a distance without reading. Is it inviting you to read it? Do you feel, hey this will quickly tell me what I want to know. Or does it look like a page from a phone book that you'll have to waste a lot of time to read. To make it attractive organize the information clearly while keeping a lot of white space in between. Look online for a nice layout that goes with a highly organized person.

I suppose you'll not format it in the way you post it here, but this makes a lot of difference when you have 100 resumes and one hour to make a selection.

Bullets are good to draw attention to summarized lists, but I feel you overuse them which makes it overwhelming. Maybe you could split the lists for each job into role and achievements either in a different section, or in two columns. Be more verbose in the achievements than the role as that is very positive and more concrete.

If you look the part, add a professional picture with a friendly smile.

I would rephrase the family trip. It sounds like a hobby work (and 250k for a trip for only 16 people? WTF!). Maybe just Coordinated Trip to 2016 Olympics, managing logistics, 250k worth of tickets and tracking refunds for unused tickets over multiple accounts.

GuitarStv

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  • Age: 36
  • Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #20 on: August 08, 2017, 12:10:49 PM »
This resume is significantly better, and I think you're almost there.  You are now giving multiple concrete examples from work history that prove your summary points, your skills carry much more information, and you've focused on the important jobs from your history.  Be very careful about tense mistakes . . . there are still a few kicking around in there.  Now we're into the polishing phase . . . you need to tell the truth about your past experience but make is sound as good as you can:


1. What don't you like about this sentence?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides to find someone who could provide the best travel experiences."

Would alternate wording make you happier about it?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides with end goal of enhancing overall travel experience for client."

2. I agree with 2Cent about the wording of the 'family and friends' trip.  Mention the trip, but leave out the 'family and friends' part.

3. Change 'Computer Lab Assistant' from:
"Assisted students and faculty with daily tasks and inquiries."
"Set up and cleaned classrooms for lectures."
"Managed front office reception area by cleaning and organizing desk and visitor lobby."

To

"Assisted students and faculty with daily tasks and inquiries."
"Performed setup and maintenance of classrooms for lectures."
"Managed front office reception area"
« Last Edit: August 08, 2017, 12:12:42 PM by GuitarStv »

JanF

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #21 on: August 08, 2017, 11:37:06 PM »
Quote
1. What don't you like about this sentence?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides to find someone who could provide the best travel experiences."

Would alternate wording make you happier about it?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides with end goal of enhancing overall travel experience for client."

It seems weaker compare to my other accomplishments. What I have now is about 1.5 pages so I'm trimming the extra fat to get it down to 1 but if I can't do that without compromising too much of the format then I'll leave it at 1.5 pages and keep it in there.

2Cent

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #22 on: August 09, 2017, 02:06:15 AM »
Quote
1. What don't you like about this sentence?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides to find someone who could provide the best travel experiences."

Would alternate wording make you happier about it?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides with end goal of enhancing overall travel experience for client."

It seems weaker compare to my other accomplishments. What I have now is about 1.5 pages so I'm trimming the extra fat to get it down to 1 but if I can't do that without compromising too much of the format then I'll leave it at 1.5 pages and keep it in there.
2 pages is not bad actually. As long as all the important stuff is in the top of page one. Page two is then for those who are more interested.

Laura33

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #23 on: August 09, 2017, 08:41:17 AM »
Quote
1. What don't you like about this sentence?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides to find someone who could provide the best travel experiences."

Would alternate wording make you happier about it?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides with end goal of enhancing overall travel experience for client."

It seems weaker compare to my other accomplishments. What I have now is about 1.5 pages so I'm trimming the extra fat to get it down to 1 but if I can't do that without compromising too much of the format then I'll leave it at 1.5 pages and keep it in there.

2 pages is not bad actually. As long as all the important stuff is in the top of page one. Page two is then for those who are more interested.

FWIW, I disagree.  Someone in their first post-college job sending in a 2-page resume comes across as puffery.  I would strongly encourage streamlining to the most relevant information, e.g., 4-5 bullets for the current job vs. 1 for the work-study.
Laugh while you can, monkey-boy

sequoia

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #24 on: August 09, 2017, 11:05:57 PM »
Education
B.S. in Criminal Justice. Graduated 2014

I'm only 25 so I don't have a long list of jobs basically this office job is the first "real" job I have and everything else is an income supplement between high school and college.

That is fine. Did you do any volunteer work in college, or any social activities outside of going to class? Member of honor society? Graduate with honor? I would mentioned those.

nick663

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Re: Resume face punch request
« Reply #25 on: August 14, 2017, 06:46:55 PM »
I think your biggest hurdle might be your degree.  If I saw that on a resume I would be scared that you were just looking for a job to pay the bills until you found something more related to your major.
Quote
1. What don't you like about this sentence?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides to find someone who could provide the best travel experiences."

Would alternate wording make you happier about it?
"Investigated and interviewed tour guides with end goal of enhancing overall travel experience for client."

It seems weaker compare to my other accomplishments. What I have now is about 1.5 pages so I'm trimming the extra fat to get it down to 1 but if I can't do that without compromising too much of the format then I'll leave it at 1.5 pages and keep it in there.

2 pages is not bad actually. As long as all the important stuff is in the top of page one. Page two is then for those who are more interested.

FWIW, I disagree.  Someone in their first post-college job sending in a 2-page resume comes across as puffery.  I would strongly encourage streamlining to the most relevant information, e.g., 4-5 bullets for the current job vs. 1 for the work-study.
This.  The resume is a sales pitch to tell them enough to be interested and think you might be a good fit for the job.  If they want to know more, they'll bring you in for an interview.