I'm vegetarian and my roommates are hosting a pig roast

[boarder42]

reggaeton is a kind of music. i dont like reggaeton, i would hate to have a reaggaeton event with people dancing and listening to that crap at my house. i dont want my house associated with reggaeton listening and dancing. is not a matter of being legal or not, marijuana is ilegal here and i dont care if people smoke it. reggaeton and swinging is not ilegal and i dislike it at my house.

for instance, by your message i can imagine that you would not enjoy naked people at your house. if you have a roommate, you probably expect this person to let you know and ask your permission before inviting 40+ naked people for a naturalism party at your place, am i right? just asking for your permission is not a matter of FORCING you to change your habits and REQUIRING you to become a naturalist. this is just common sense.

My point is that this is just a roommate communication issue, it happens in most families and most shared flats. It`s not a discussion of veganism. Everyone should live with people that know you and respect you.

its an issue of veganism/veggieism  b/c that is the approach the OP took ... only after being destroyed for the selfishness of that, was it exposed that they had not asked the OP about throwing said party to which everyone here said yes they should have asked ... but the original premise of the thread was just about the act of roasting a pig and how awful it is to look at for someone who doesnt eat it.

well maybe some people took this personally.
if you live with a pastor, dont invite friends for a drugs & orgy at home. if you live with obama, don't do a pro-trump event at home. if you live with a vegan, dont pig roast at home.  it's common sense, let's have some empathy and ask our roommates if it's ok to do something that you already know is not aligned with his/her values. communication is free and beautiful!

none of that is common sense.  if i live with obama and we're both reasonable humans entitled to our own beliefs i can let him know i'm doing it but still throw the party.  how about if you are a vegan dont take personal offense to someone eating meat.  its a free world.  and you're still saying ASK the OP wasnt about the fact they didnt ASK it was about the fact they were doing it. 

lets see there are 4 people there 1 of which shares a different view and is flabbergasted they would do something of their view.  how bout if you're views are that strong WTF are you even living with the meat eaters for or better yet have one of the as your SO. 

grow thicker skin ... but i guess that may take a meat product.

[GuitarStv]

well maybe some people took this personally.
if you live with a pastor, dont invite friends for a drugs & orgy at home. if you live with obama, don't do a pro-trump event at home. if you live with a vegan, dont pig roast at home.  it's common sense, let's have some empathy and ask our roommates if it's ok to do something that you already know is not aligned with his/her values. communication is free and beautiful!

They kinda did get her approval through communication though.

The first night I heard of the event, we were all sitting around the fire (7+ people including my house and the neighbors) and they had already made quite a few plans around the event. They said "so is everyone cool with X date?" and looked around, and I was really caught off guard and just said "uhhh I don't give a shit what yall do I don't really have any interest in this haha".

[nereo]

well maybe some people took this personally.
if you live with a pastor, dont invite friends for a drugs & orgy at home. if you live with obama, don't do a pro-trump event at home. if you live with a vegan, dont pig roast at home.  it's common sense, let's have some empathy and ask our roommates if it's ok to do something that you already know is not aligned with his/her values. communication is free and beautiful!

This seems like strange advice to me. I've lived with many different kinds of people, and all of them differed from me in some significant way, weather it was diet, political affiliation, religion, etc. I lived with someone who was jewish who held Seder at our place. Another was in theatre and threw cast-parties after shows (imagine a bunch of exhibitionists together with alcohol and you'll get the idea).  Another was a gamer who held LAN parties.  I wouldn't expect them not to be who they were just because we we living together.  Many of the things they did I wouldn't ever do on my own, but that's part of living together and to be honest sometimes I found it kinda fun.  As one person in a group, you also don't get to veto things like this.
As I said earlier I think the main issue here is that the OP wasn't involved much in the planning phase, but (s)he did seem to be aware that it was happening well in advance.

[sakura]

reggaeton is a kind of music. i dont like reggaeton, i would hate to have a reaggaeton event with people dancing and listening to that crap at my house. i dont want my house associated with reggaeton listening and dancing. is not a matter of being legal or not, marijuana is ilegal here and i dont care if people smoke it. reggaeton and swinging is not ilegal and i dislike it at my house.

for instance, by your message i can imagine that you would not enjoy naked people at your house. if you have a roommate, you probably expect this person to let you know and ask your permission before inviting 40+ naked people for a naturalism party at your place, am i right? just asking for your permission is not a matter of FORCING you to change your habits and REQUIRING you to become a naturalist. this is just common sense.

My point is that this is just a roommate communication issue, it happens in most families and most shared flats. It`s not a discussion of veganism. Everyone should live with people that know you and respect you.

its an issue of veganism/veggieism  b/c that is the approach the OP took ... only after being destroyed for the selfishness of that, was it exposed that they had not asked the OP about throwing said party to which everyone here said yes they should have asked ... but the original premise of the thread was just about the act of roasting a pig and how awful it is to look at for someone who doesnt eat it.

well maybe some people took this personally.
if you live with a pastor, dont invite friends for a drugs & orgy at home. if you live with obama, don't do a pro-trump event at home. if you live with a vegan, dont pig roast at home.  it's common sense, let's have some empathy and ask our roommates if it's ok to do something that you already know is not aligned with his/her values. communication is free and beautiful!

none of that is common sense.  if i live with obama and we're both reasonable humans entitled to our own beliefs i can let him know i'm doing it but still throw the party.  how about if you are a vegan dont take personal offense to someone eating meat.  its a free world.  and you're still saying ASK the OP wasnt about the fact they didnt ASK it was about the fact they were doing it. 

lets see there are 4 people there 1 of which shares a different view and is flabbergasted they would do something of their view.  how bout if you're views are that strong WTF are you even living with the meat eaters for or better yet have one of the as your SO. 

grow thicker skin ... but i guess that may take a meat product.

well board42, i do not think you're wrong, i just think a little empathy costs nothing and goes great miles to having a nice friendly environment where everyone feels comfortable.

I guess my `common sense` was too optimist hahaha let me correct it for `manners` or `etiquette`. Living in a community requires some sacrifices in order to have a good vibe.
if the roommates had personally ASKED her (talking about a final date in front of other people is not asking) she could have answered no, and the problem would not exist. Just asking probably would make her feel better, regardless of having it there or not. Im sure Obama would rather have some thoughtful empathic roommates than a selfcentered thick skin one :P

if i know my mom doesnt like to swear, of course i can yell my lungs out FUCK, MOM, I AM FREE TO SAY WHAT I WANT. I FUCKING ENJOY SWEAR WORDS! STOP BEING A PUSSY, GROW SOME BALLS AND THICKER SKIN!!! - but i might as well just ask "mom, i know you dont like swear words, do you mind if i use them when im with you?", or i could even make an effort and just in case avoid saying swear words on her company. That would be very mature and nice.

[dividendman]

I think this whole thing comes down to the fact that some people are easily offended and in our (western) culture it's more and more cool to be offended. Just look at so many of the news article headlines.

Whether it's people not standing for the US national anthem, people eating meat, someone calling someone else fat, a politician using a swear word, nudity anywhere, people just love getting offended. I really don't get it at all.

I'm pretty much never offended. People could throw racial slurs at me, or do whatever else that's not physically harming me and I'd be fine with it. I mean, who cares?

The really offensive stuff is when people are killed or injured, but that doesn't seem to get as much press, and people seem to be less offended by that than by some politician not wearing a US flag pin on 9/11.

[boarder42]

I think this whole thing comes down to the fact that some people are easily offended and in our (western) culture it's more and more cool to be offended. Just look at so many of the news article headlines.

Whether it's people not standing for the US national anthem, people eating meat, someone calling someone else fat, a politician using a swear word, nudity anywhere, people just love getting offended. I really don't get it at all.

I'm pretty much never offended. People could throw racial slurs at me, or do whatever else that's not physically harming me and I'd be fine with it. I mean, who cares?

The really offensive stuff is when people are killed or injured, but that doesn't seem to get as much press, and people seem to be less offended by that than by some politician not wearing a US flag pin on 9/11.

yeah this is a good take.  hense my thicker skin comment above.  it has become "cool" to be offended.

[swick]

Alrighty people, we all know the forum rules. I'm not going to go in and edit every single post that was reported on in this topic.

If you can't play nice we'll be handing out warnings faster than candy on Haloween.