This is actually an interesting cultural thing, too. In any communication, ideally the speaker tries to be clear, and the listener tries to understand. But do we put the bulk of the responsibility on the speaker or the listener? Western culture puts the bulk on the speaker, eastern culture on the listener.
This is something a Westerner learns when speaking to Japanese or Chinese or Indian and they say, "yes, yes." In the Western world, "yes" means "yes, I understand." In the east, it means, "yes, I am listening." So you could be explaining something and then later be confused when it turns out they didn't understand a single fucking thing you said. They didn't ask for clarification because if they don't understand they assume it's their fault.
On the flipside, the easterner may be offended at how blunt and direct the Westerner is.
I wouldn't know about this, except that my wife, while Australian of European heritage, has worked as a Japanese-English interpreter/translator.
Obviously, these are generalisations and individuals vary, especially in today's globalised culture where aspects of one culture mix into another. But there it is, still, and these cultural differences illustrate personal ones.
In person, one part of speech is tone. This is absent in text, which is why in this text-heavy world we've introduced emojis, so that we know the difference between "you bastard" spoken affectionately and "you bastard" spoken in contempt. Absent tone, people tend to read their own mood and past experiences into your text. Which is why relatively neutral comments can be taken as extreme praise or condemnation, why measured criticism can be taken as extreme bigotry, and so on.
If the last 10 people I spoke to in person who said "you bastard" meant it in a contemptuous way, then the 11th time it happens and it's just in text, I'm going to have those 10 other people in my head, and read it that way, and maybe I'll get offended and storm off.
With that in mind, perhaps we Westerners writing here need to think more eastern in our reading. After all, while I can adjust what I say so that a particular individual can understand it as I intend it, our writing on a forum can be read by hundreds of people, there's simply no way I can adjust it to fit them all, especially as I don't know them all. Perhaps the onus does need to be on the listener.