@zoochadookdook I'm chiming in for the first time to tell you well done! You are doing the right thing here and handling it correctly, like a gentleman.
I think this was your first and only serious relationship? So this is your first breakup. Breakups suck. There's no way to do it without some pain, really.
You might not realize it, but your text conversation with your ex last night fell into the time honored cliche of "It's not you, it's me". There's a reason this is time honored. It's the way to be polite about things, and leave no room for the other person to say "But I can change to be more like what you want!"
The less you communicate with your ex now, the better. You are giving her a great opportunity to have to grow and mature by making a clean break with her. She needs to deal with the loss of things she dreamed of -- apparently growing old together, and living in that house and decorating it, were things she dreamed of and always imagined doing. It will take some time, but eventually she will realize that she can still have those things, but with someone who wants *just* those things as well.
But you need to give her the space to find people to comfort her on her own. She is using you for emotional support right now because that's what she is used to, but when you stop providing that, she will develop other resources. She has to do this, and the longer you prop her up the harder it will be for her to develop and mature.
Trust that you are doing the right thing in separating from her and allowing her to grow and mature as you focus on yourself.
