Author Topic: Yet another daycare thread  (Read 853 times)

Mountainbug

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Yet another daycare thread
« on: March 16, 2017, 06:56:04 PM »
So I'm torn. I have a one year old who I am thinking about putting in daycare. We live in a small town (4 daycare centers, all with waiting lists) and one center called me with a half time open spot. I did a tour and it seemed okay, not great but nothing bad that I could point out. Financially, it is expensive but not a burden to send him. I recently interviewed for a part time job doing research in my field, but won't hear back for another week or two. Husband is currently doing police academy two hours away so I am solo parent Monday-Friday. It is a huge drain on my emotions and energy, but since I made the choice to support this situation I have just been trying to deal with it.

Center wants me to start Monday and pay up for registration tomorrow to "hold my spot"... If I don't get the job, then it seems like a huge waste of money. I also am hesitant to send him so young (of course I'll also miss him terribly so this might just be a selfish concern). Family is not an option as everyone works too much and my schedule will be highly variable if I get the job. Other concerns are that I just graduated college and am afraid if I don't start working right away I won't be able to get in after child-rearing years are done.

What would you do in my shoes?

Goldielocks

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Re: Yet another daycare thread
« Reply #1 on: March 17, 2017, 01:57:08 AM »
Do you even want a part time opening?   If that is what you want, then I might go for it.

But, if you really want FT (if you start working), then hold off.  Tell them the job hasn't come through yet, so you can wait, but please keep your spot on the list, and give the PT opening to the next person.

BeanCounter

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Re: Yet another daycare thread
« Reply #2 on: March 17, 2017, 04:04:26 AM »
Unfortunately it seems that when you work part time and pay for day care you are really only working to get out of the house. Once you pay for daycare there is very little income coming home. But I live in a big city where care is $300 a week for that age and they discount very little for part time. YMMV
Of course some people are okay with that. But if your heart isn't in it, then I'd just wait and go back full time a little later.

MrsPB

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Re: Yet another daycare thread
« Reply #3 on: March 17, 2017, 08:42:44 AM »
If you do want the job but need to make the daycare commitment before knowing if you get it, can you ask the daycare centre if they will refund you if they find someone else to take the spot, in the event you don't get the job? Seeing as they have a wait list, I imagine they will fill it right away if you didn't end up needing it. Worth asking, just in case.

MayDay

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Re: Yet another daycare thread
« Reply #4 on: March 18, 2017, 12:44:42 PM »
You will be screwed if you suddenly get a job (any job) and need to start, and everything has a months long waiting list.

I think it comes down to whether you want to work or not. It sounds like you do. So I'd take the spot. You can always drop it in a few months of the job hunt isn't successful. You also probably have first dibs on a full time spot when you need one, if you take the PT spot.
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Laura33

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Re: Yet another daycare thread
« Reply #5 on: March 18, 2017, 03:22:09 PM »
You will be screwed if you suddenly get a job (any job) and need to start, and everything has a months long waiting list.

I think it comes down to whether you want to work or not. It sounds like you do. So I'd take the spot. You can always drop it in a few months of the job hunt isn't successful. You also probably have first dibs on a full time spot when you need one, if you take the PT spot.

ITA with this.  Especially the "take the PT spot to be first in line for a FT spot" bit -- that's what I had to do with my DD when our first daycare fell through the week before I was supposed to go back to work.  Worked great.

I think the bigger question is whether you (1) actually want to send your kid to daycare and work, (2) don't necessarily want to work and send your kid to daycare but are feeling the strain of your situation and think that getting of the house and working and getting some daycare will provide you a sanity break, or (3) don't really want to work or send your kid to daycare but feel like you should because you're afraid of future employability.

1 and 2 are perfectly legitimate reasons to take the daycare slot.  3 is your fear speaking, and is probably overstated; you are young, you have plenty of time in front of you to both work and raise your family.

And if this daycare is meh, you can always stay on the other lists and change over when another slot becomes available.  None of this has to be permanent; it just has to be good enough (on all fronts) to get you through "now."
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Mountainbug

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Re: Yet another daycare thread
« Reply #6 on: March 22, 2017, 08:36:52 AM »
You will be screwed if you suddenly get a job (any job) and need to start, and everything has a months long waiting list.

I think it comes down to whether you want to work or not. It sounds like you do. So I'd take the spot. You can always drop it in a few months of the job hunt isn't successful. You also probably have first dibs on a full time spot when you need one, if you take the PT spot.

ITA with this.  Especially the "take the PT spot to be first in line for a FT spot" bit -- that's what I had to do with my DD when our first daycare fell through the week before I was supposed to go back to work.  Worked great.

I think the bigger question is whether you (1) actually want to send your kid to daycare and work, (2) don't necessarily want to work and send your kid to daycare but are feeling the strain of your situation and think that getting of the house and working and getting some daycare will provide you a sanity break, or (3) don't really want to work or send your kid to daycare but feel like you should because you're afraid of future employability.

1 and 2 are perfectly legitimate reasons to take the daycare slot.  3 is your fear speaking, and is probably overstated; you are young, you have plenty of time in front of you to both work and raise your family.

And if this daycare is meh, you can always stay on the other lists and change over when another slot becomes available.  None of this has to be permanent; it just has to be good enough (on all fronts) to get you through "now."


Spot on, thank you for the advice! I ended up trying the daycare out. After two days of nonstop crying there and not sleeping at home I've decided to hold off and look for alternatives. I really appreciate the input here!