The Money Mustache Community
Learning, Sharing, and Teaching => Mini Money Mustaches => Topic started by: lifejoy on January 15, 2018, 08:30:19 PM
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My 5-month-old is sleep-torturing me and I have no life :)
Which ages can I look forward to? 25? 8? 1? 40? Lol
Let me know, I could use some hope!
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I think 6-18 months is wonderful! They have personality, are learning, but haven’t hit the NO stage yet. Ages 4 & 5 are also great to see how their mind is working.
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I like every stage once they started responding a bit (3+ months) but my favorites were when they are learning to talk well. So much fun when they learn a word and use it appropriately! The way my kid's mind works is a source of wonder and fun for me.
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I have stepkids and a kid of my own, and thus far have covered ages 0 through 10 (kid, stepgrands) and 13-mid-30s (steps).
I'm finding 10 pretty good and would say things really started getting noticeably more fun about 8. But 10 is fabulous! I can issue requests (or instructions) like, "Please empty the dishwasher," and -- he does. It's fabulous. But also there's lots of fun stuff we can do together where he is really a contributing/participating member of the process/discussion/etc. Also, he will sleep past 7 a.m. if allowed to do so (that pretty much didn't start happening until he was about 8).
The teenage years were a mixed bag (steps, though, obviously, we were just embarking on our relationship then and it's probably not an entirely fair comparison to a kid one has known from day 1 and who's not trying to figure out, as I was, how stepparents/kids relate). But from the early- to mid-20s they've been pretty much fun, too. :) .
The grands are reminding me why really the early years are not my favorite.
Though don't get me wrong, there have been wonderful events, moments, activities at every age. But I definitely prefer moderately independent, able to follow simple instructions, and not-too-likely-to-engage-in-self-destructive-behavior.
On a positive note if (like me) you turn out to be someone who prefers older kids to little kids, then the trend will be in a good direction. It seems to me it would be really difficult to be a parent if your most preferred ages were the really young ones, because it would all be a downhill slide after the early years.
If I could do one thing different vis-a-vis my kid's earlier years, it would be to make more use of paid childcare. We are fortunate to have lots of good choices available around us, and I wish we'd relied on them more -- particularly as a sociable only child, he loved the time he did have in daycare (roughly 16 hours/week from 2 months until he was 4 and then 24 hours for the final year before kindergarten, but throw in an extra 8-16 hours of grandma care as well) and would, I think, have benefited from getting more of it, as would I have from doing less juggling and having more energy for the time we did spend together.
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Mine are still young (almost 3 yr old and a 15 month).
The first six months had some bright spots but in general I enjoyed the 8-18 month much better as they hit their prime in adorableness and show more personality. They also sleep better (not perfectly). 2 yrs can be nice as well since they are potty trained and, at least in the case of my daughter, can hold a conversation.
I think I will prefer even more the age when I can work in the backyard without having to watch them like a hawk, worrying about what they are putting in their mouth or what they are trying to jump off.
Unfortunately if you were concerned about having a social life ours has not returned yet and will likely not for several more years. We tend to spend more time with family as they often share the workload for a precious few hours without a second thought.
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I love 18 month - 3 years. They were so cute, learning so much, and they were still pretty portable.
After that, you get more sleep, but more grey hairs.
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I'm loving 6 and 9. We recently spent some time with my sister who has a 3 year old and a few months old baby. I'd forgotten how hard those ages are and was very glad that my kids are older now. I love sleeping through the night, not having to watch them constantly and the fact that they are quite independent. Older DD spends hours reading and younger DD plays with playdoh, lego, magnatiles or dolls completely independently.
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I figured I would like the 6-11 years the best, camping, biking, gardening, being active... without having to carry them, and everything they needed!
mine are almost 5, 2 and one more due in May... 5 is already starting to look great, so much independence already! She gets her brother breakfast, puts his and her clothes on etc... but 6-18 months was also a lot of fun, before they learn to talk back. I think we will just survive the no and the why stage... (2ish, through 4ish). I have no idea what preteens and teens is gong to look like, but I imagine that depends more on the kid then any other stage...
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I think all ages have been fun....but when my 10 and 12 yo had to do the snow shoveling and not me - I must say this age is pretty good.
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I really did not like the first year. Since little man turned one, it been pretty awesome and keeps getting better (he's just over two now). I know he's supposed to turn into a monster soon, but man, I really like spending time with him now. Hang in there!
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You guys are the best :)
The sleeplessness is really hard at times... I don’t want to wish away the baby days but at the same time it’s really nice to have older ages to look forward to! :)
Thanks for the hope lol <3
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So far I like 4 - 8 months better than 0 - 4 months. That's as much perspective as I have right now ;-)
It's not the same as with your own kids, I'm sure, but my nine year old nephew is just so cool to have conversations with now. He knows a bit about the world, has opinions on stuff, doesn't whine at all - brilliant! I look forward to that age.
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We adopted our children at 13 months old, so I didn't have the tiny baby months to compare to. However, my favorites have been 5-7 and 9-10. Both my kids decided to be complete a-holes at age 8 for some reason. I love 9-10 b/c the physical needs are low and even though the emotional needs are ramping up, they can have a semi-logical conversation and still want to be involved, play games and sometimes be silly.
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You guys are the best :)
The sleeplessness is really hard at times... I don’t want to wish away the baby days but at the same time it’s really nice to have older ages to look forward to! :)
Thanks for the hope lol <3
Sleeplessness is tough for sure especially if you have things to do during the day....such as take care of kids or go to work. It's cliché but it does go really fast so don't fret. Get a nap in when they are sleeping. Don't stress about the minor BS that you used to...chores don't have to be done everyday on schedule.
There are so many opinions on baby sleeping - crib, let em cry, bassinet in your room, etc. I say do whatever works for you and the baby that promotes sleep. For us it basically meant all of kids slept in our room in bassinet or in bed with us for the first year. Most popular guidance is that you shouldn't do this for safety and sanity issues but it worked great for us.
But it goes fast so enjoy it, even the rougher times, which by the way there will be plenty of those in your future but for different reasons.
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With the benefit of hindsight, I liked age 3-5 best (but actually, having a sensible, interesting, pleasant 18 year old is also pretty good.)
First few months is very tough, no doubt about it. Physically demanding, no sleep, stressful. Again, with the benefit of hindsight, it is all over very quickly - just doesn't seem that way at the time.
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With the benefit of hindsight, I liked age 3-5 best (but actually, having a sensible, interesting, pleasant 18 year old is also pretty good.)
First few months is very tough, no doubt about it. Physically demanding, no sleep, stressful. Again, with the benefit of hindsight, it is all over very quickly - just doesn't seem that way at the time.
“The days are long and the years are short” :)
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Mine are 5 years and 8 months, so I don't have a huge range of experiences.
The 8-month-old is smiley and adorable and (mostly) portable and is juuuust beginning to sleep through the night (a future of sleep is in sight!).
The 5-year-old is a ton of fun--she has a wild imagination and I love that she's starting to enjoy some of my favorite outdoor activities (skiing, skating). However, it's a LOT easier to take the 8-month-old for a long hike than it is to take the 5-year-old.
My DH has said that he has liked 4+ most of all.
For me, I have enjoyed pretty much every age from 8 months with my older kid, though the tantrums that happened on and off from 2.5 to 3.5 were rough at times. Having been through it once and knowing that we are done, I have been able to enjoy my second's babyhood a lot more than I enjoyed the first time around.
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You guys are the best :)
The sleeplessness is really hard at times... I don’t want to wish away the baby days but at the same time it’s really nice to have older ages to look forward to! :)
Thanks for the hope lol <3
I've only got 0 to 2.2 perspective but it's been all getting better so far. The first big step up was about 6 months when she started eating solids. So much less stress to know I could be gone and she could eat cereal and not starve. They aren't kidding about the vocabulary exploding day by day around 2. All of a sudden I'm hearing excerpts from "Fox in Sox" parroted back to me.
This too shall pass. You can do it!
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My older kid is four so I haven't run the whole gamut of ages, yet. But I miss the 0-6 months age. Yes, it's a really intense time (especially if you are exclusively breastfeeding and baby wakes often), but they are snuggly and super-adorable and you can generally satisfy all their wants and needs. Food, warmth, security, sleep, some mental and social stimulation, being with mommy. Happiness. :) I see the day coming when I'll have to try to explain to my 4YO why her classmates were invited to a birthday party but she wasn't. Someday, my kids will probably have love life woes I can't do anything about. Career or academic frustrations. Health problems. A cute newborn that just wants to be rocked is so much easier. 👶🏻 And the rushes of oxytocin are great. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Having been through it once and knowing that we are done, I have been able to enjoy my second's babyhood a lot more than I enjoyed the first time around.
That is nice to hear. I will admit that sometimes I feel stressed like “How will I ever get through this again??” And I’m not enjoying the baby days as much as I might is it was more “oh wow this is yhe last time for this!”
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You guys are the best :)
The sleeplessness is really hard at times... I don’t want to wish away the baby days but at the same time it’s really nice to have older ages to look forward to! :)
Thanks for the hope lol <3
I've only got 0 to 2.2 perspective but it's been all getting better so far. The first big step up was about 6 months when she started eating solids. So much less stress to know I could be gone and she could eat cereal and not starve. They aren't kidding about the vocabulary exploding day by day around 2. All of a sudden I'm hearing excerpts from "Fox in Sox" parroted back to me.
This too shall pass. You can do it!
Thanks <3
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About to have three under age four. The first 15-18 months are hard with how you have to micromanage them. The spit-up, spills, messes, blow-outs, falls, rapidly developed physical overconfidence... and the sleep. After that the roller-coaster has gotten more exaggerated- higher highs (hearing 3yo sing Xmas songs) and lower lows (enduring her 45min tantrums at bedtime).
I don't know. Every family is different. I do look forward to when our time/activities are not ruled by sleep schedules.
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From a Fathers point of view and having 4 I enjoyed the first month or two. Then when they could start walking and beyond. Teenage years look out! and then after HS and in College they circle back but overall , all the time you somehow enjoy. They do 10 stupid things and one good thing makes it all go away at most any age.
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They do 10 stupid things and one good thing makes it all go away at most any age.
LOL isn't that the truth.
Mine was really good around age 4. I also liked the brief period when they can sit but can't move anywhere.
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None of my kids slept well until they were over a year old. Stay strong. Sleep deprivation sucks and turns me into a worse version of myself. From my perspective (I have kids aged 2, 4, and 6), every age they've hit has been the best. I just like them more as they get older. Babies and toddlers are so goddamned illogical. My two-year-old is a holy terror. But so were the 4- and 6-year old at one point. I appreciate children more when they're capable of making rational choices, and they seem to get more rational with time. We'll see what it's like when puberty hits, I guess. I know I wouldn't have wanted to the parent of 16-year-old me :-/
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@lifejoy my first was a good sleeper, 4 hour stretches fairly quickly and then 6 hours around 6-8 weeks. She went through the 4-month sleep regression and we did a little CIO, and boom pretty much sleeping through the night with one early morning wake up to feed.
My second... had reflux I think he slept 4 hours once between 0 and 7 months. He needed to be held upright most nights, and had 3-hour crying spells generally from 2-5 am 3-4x a week. I went through an elimination diet to see what triggered the major reflux issues and he went on meds (milk and egg protein was a definite contributor). No CIO until he grew out of the reflux, crying makes it way worse, and the kid was in a lot of pain. Around 6 months when solids were solidly introduced and he could roll over and sleep on his tummy things started to get better, we sleep trained at 7 months and by a year he was happily sleeping through the night.
Now we are expecting #3 in May, while I am praying for a good sleeper (or at least colic over reflux - they grow out of colic faster), I know that you really can do anything for a year. A few months of good sleep solve almost every ill... or sleep deprivation really does mess with your memory. If we must we just might eat a lot of take out and not clean our bathrooms for 6 months! We will get the laundry done, but not put away and folded, our kids will be fed and happy, but our floors might be sticky. Ask for help, pay for help and let more things go. Prioritize sleep and eating and enjoying what you can. Then practice not feeling guilty about anything or everything else - unfinished chores, missed playdates, being late, taking a nap instead of cooking dinner (this does take practice). There will be time to do those things on time and you will have a clean house again.
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@lifejoy my first was a good sleeper, 4 hour stretches fairly quickly and then 6 hours around 6-8 weeks. She went through the 4-month sleep regression and we did a little CIO, and boom pretty much sleeping through the night with one early morning wake up to feed.
My second... had reflux I think he slept 4 hours once between 0 and 7 months. He needed to be held upright most nights, and had 3-hour crying spells generally from 2-5 am 3-4x a week. I went through an elimination diet to see what triggered the major reflux issues and he went on meds (milk and egg protein was a definite contributor). No CIO until he grew out of the reflux, crying makes it way worse, and the kid was in a lot of pain. Around 6 months when solids were solidly introduced and he could roll over and sleep on his tummy things started to get better, we sleep trained at 7 months and by a year he was happily sleeping through the night.
Now we are expecting #3 in May, while I am praying for a good sleeper (or at least colic over reflux - they grow out of colic faster), I know that you really can do anything for a year. A few months of good sleep solve almost every ill... or sleep deprivation really does mess with your memory. If we must we just might eat a lot of take out and not clean our bathrooms for 6 months! We will get the laundry done, but not put away and folded, our kids will be fed and happy, but our floors might be sticky. Ask for help, pay for help and let more things go. Prioritize sleep and eating and enjoying what you can. Then practice not feeling guilty about anything or everything else - unfinished chores, missed playdates, being late, taking a nap instead of cooking dinner (this does take practice). There will be time to do those things on time and you will have a clean house again.
Not OP but needed to read this today. We have a toddler and a 7 month old. Both are good sleepers once they start sleeping. The problem is getting them to sleep. We are also starting the discussion of three kids vs two (both want three and we want to get baby making done before I turn 35 due to some issues) but my husband is now way more cautious about having third kid since he feels we are running at max with two kids and two demanding careers and a reasonable semblance of a sane life (clean house, some socialization, etc). Your post shows where we can let more things go and go after what is important for us (third kid). Thanks!
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@ firelight
:)
I definitely needed to write it, and remind myself that the mess and chaos is temporary. My kids have been sick on and off for the last 8 weeks, my husband is claiming he has 'the flu' for the 3rd time this winter, and my mom was moved into hospice yesterday after 3 weeks in the hospital and a bad bout of pneumonia.. that she won't fully recover from. And work asked me in November to move from part-time back to full time.. I'm so not doing full time at the moment, between the sick kids, my OB appointments/ultrasounds and doctors meetings with my mom - sigh.
I am definitely in triage mode, and letting anything I can go... but definitely still practicing that 'not feeling guilty' part; that's a work in progress. It may always be a work in progress, but it is a skill I have gotten significantly better at with practice.
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For us, up through three or so was really challenging. Then some teenager-style struggles around middle-school age: but the real teen years were terrific.... My basic experience of child-rearing has been a steep decline of difficulty and gradual increase of reward. Nowadays it's all gravy.
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1 year was awesome - you still have full control over them, but they are interactive and genuinely enjoy your presence without being too feisty. You get those baby smiles, laughs, grins, and snuggles without the constant feeding and pooping of a younger baby. Then they progress to 2+yrs and become little jerks (adorable jerks, but jerks nonetheless). Don't get me wrong, I love my 2 year old but she is far more exhausting now than when she was a baby!
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Neither of mine slept for the first year, and we had two within 13 months. I'll let you do the math on how much sleep we got for 2+ years. ;-) (Also, mini pill fail - #2 was not planned, for the record). In hindsight, could not have asked for a better situation. But, it's easy for me to say that now. I've liked each age progressively more, and feel like we are in the sweet spot now, with both about to turn 11 & 12. I LOVE this phase. Now, the almost 12 year old is getting a little sassy (middle schooler), so perhaps 10 & 11 are the sweet spots, but it is so much fun to have people with their own strong personalities, interests, passions, friends, and they can be left alone for periods of time. That part.is.GLORIOUS.
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My little is 14 months old and I really started to enjoy her around 8 months, and that continues. Everyday is a vivid new experience from her perspective.
Sleep got better around 6 mos (we sleep-trained) which helped a lot. We also started her at daycare at 11 months as she is very social. We all love it. In Quebec it’s very affordable and her group is wonderful.
More paid childcare...completely agree with Bogart on that. Parents have to take care of themselves to take care of their children.
My stepdaughter is almost 12 now and I’ve enjoyed most her stages, though I’m not her full-time parent so I sort get the highlights reel.
Good luck!
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I really did not like the first year. Since little man turned one, it been pretty awesome and keeps getting better (he's just over two now). [snip]
Maybe it is a male perspective, but I only felt like the clean-up and support crew for the first 2 years. I read Narnia to them (all 7 books, because I loved them as a child myself). I was an enthusiastic participant in any outdoor activity; but really a guy feels like a third wheel until the kids become mobile and interactive. Mostly, I was excitedly recording the goings on from a bit of an outsider perspective - and that paid off in spades when I put those images and videos together in a coffee book and DVD's.
I'm not sure, for the next generation, that posting online is a good idea just in case it eventually burdens your children. I'm very nervous about the long term negative impacts of the internet - that big data will inspect photos and posts in a negative way when you faced 'normal' struggles or abnormal success in the past.
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I really did not like the first year. Since little man turned one, it been pretty awesome and keeps getting better (he's just over two now). [snip]
Maybe it is a male perspective, but I only felt like the clean-up and support crew for the first 2 years. I read Narnia to them (all 7 books, because I loved them as a child myself). I was an enthusiastic participant in any outdoor activity; but really a guy feels like a third wheel until the kids become mobile and interactive. Mostly, I was excitedly recording the goings on from a bit of an outsider perspective - and that paid off in spades when I put those images and videos together in a coffee book and DVD's.
I'm a lady, but I can see what you mean about a dad feeling left out. I breastfed, which meant a lot of the time I felt like I had too much time with the baby, and DH probably didn't have enough. I'm not someone who got a lot of emotional benefit from breastfeeding, though. I really started bonding with my son, when he started wanting me to read him books (right around a year), so I definitely relate to you reading your kids Narnia. :)
It's neat that you figured out a way to be involved on the recording angle. Somewhat similarly, I set up a gmail account for our son, and DH likes to email our son there to tell him about all the things he's doing. Who knows if our son will ever read it, but it's a nice record for us.
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I really did not like the first year. Since little man turned one, it been pretty awesome and keeps getting better (he's just over two now). [snip]
Maybe it is a male perspective, but I only felt like the clean-up and support crew for the first 2 years. I read Narnia to them (all 7 books, because I loved them as a child myself). I was an enthusiastic participant in any outdoor activity; but really a guy feels like a third wheel until the kids become mobile and interactive. Mostly, I was excitedly recording the goings on from a bit of an outsider perspective - and that paid off in spades when I put those images and videos together in a coffee book and DVD's.
I'm a lady, but I can see what you mean about a dad feeling left out. I breastfed, which meant a lot of the time I felt like I had too much time with the baby, and DH probably didn't have enough. I'm not someone who got a lot of emotional benefit from breastfeeding, though. I really started bonding with my son, when he started wanting me to read him books (right around a year), so I definitely relate to you reading your kids Narnia. :)
It's neat that you figured out a way to be involved on the recording angle. Somewhat similarly, I set up a gmail account for our son, and DH likes to email our son there to tell him about all the things he's doing. Who knows if our son will ever read it, but it's a nice record for us.
That is a really cool email time capsule idea! Totally gonna do that!!
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4-8
I have two boys. Age of maximum happiness and learning and becoming PEOPLE.
That age. They are so excited about LIFE. And they haven't turned into an annoying pre-teen yet.
Sleep can put a damper on that though. Mine sleep fine.
They are 5 & 11.
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Ages 4-6. They still are little but have some independence.
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My favourite so far is 13, for sure!
8 and 12 were the hard years in my parenting so far. I mean, some disability stuff was super hard at other points but in terms of regular parenting stuff, these are our numbers.
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8 and 12 were the hard years in my parenting so far. I mean, some disability stuff was super hard at other points but in terms of regular parenting stuff, these are our numbers.
Yes! When our son was 8, he decided to emulate all the worst kids in his class. That was not a fun year. When he was 12, he was just obnoxious. We thought we were in for a rocky ride during the teenage years, but nope, nothing was worse than 12.
I will admit I was not a fan of the baby stage, but that may have been coloured by DS having colic for the first 4 months (and may not have been colic, but allergies. Doctors just called everything colic then and left us to figure it out ourselves ). Once he was moving on his own and sleeping through the night, things looked up for both of us. : )
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Mine are 12 and 14.
My favorite ages were probably 8-10.
But once they didn't need a babysitter anymore, and could get themselves around town on their bikes or walk alone - even though it was puberty - that was pretty freakin' awesome.
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Hard to generalize with my kids.
For my first, he's been great, though a lot of work, basically starting at about 4 months (colicky newborn). He's had a couple of rougher phases ('no' phase for a couple of months at 3YO, brooding phase here or there). 7YO now, and though he doesn't have the unabashed joy we loved so much in his younger self, it's wonderful to see him growing and learning at an exponential pace. Activities are becoming easier to do with him, and he's a lot less work than he used to be.
For my second, she was a great infant, but was just plain awful from 6 months to around her 4th birthday. Super strong-willed, and had no desire whatsoever to please us. Now (5YO) she's a treat.
Love their current ages, but also looking forward to the ability to really do more family outings as they become more independent.
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I love teenagers! Babies and toddlers are cute, but I prefer rational beings ;-) Teenagers have tons of interesting ideas and questions to discuss, and they can present reasons for their thoughts and consider yours. Really great conversations!
Adults are fun too. When you hear your daughter say to her daughter the same thing you said twenty-five years earlier....
Mother of seven, currently aged 14-26, grandmother to three ages 0-3.
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I love teenagers! Babies and toddlers are cute, but I prefer rational beings ;-) Teenagers have tons of interesting ideas and questions to discuss, and they can present reasons for their thoughts and consider yours. Really great conversations!
Adults are fun too. When you hear your daughter say to her daughter the same thing you said twenty-five years earlier....
Mother of seven, currently aged 14-26, grandmother to three ages 0-3.
Trying to wrap my head around so much of this... teenagers = rational beings?? Having seven kids???
What kind of magical sorceress are you?! ;)
Haha but seriously, I’m curious: when did more kids stop being colossally more difficult? Like two is harder than one, and three is harder than two, but maybe six is not so much harder than five? Let me know!
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Right now, ours are 12 and 8, and life is pretty damn easy at the moment. We can board games and card games as a family without having to dumb down the rules or anything. The oldest does dishes, helps with mowing the yard, does her own laundry, etc. The younger one sweeps the house, vacuums, does the garbage, although she struggles to keep her room clean.
All of the girls' friends are nice kids at good schools. No drama at school. Both getting good grades.
I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. But I do love this combination of ages.
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^ Because I am years behind on shows, I just learned who Nick Miller is, and the lawyer/author thing :)
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5-8 are the golden years as far as I'm concerned. I'm not a baby person. Babies are disgusting, screamy, toxic waste producers. Toddlers are irrational tyrants.
From about 5-8, they are old enough to be human, but young enough not to be snotty. They are full of wonder about everything. I loved the whole teaching them to read and do simple math stuff.
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^ Because I am years behind on shows, I just learned who Nick Miller is, and the lawyer/author thing :)
@jooniFLORisploo, haha yes I love the character, and since he's a lawyer (well almost...I think he went to law school but didn't pass the bar?) and also a writer (sorta...he wrote half a novel about zombies, right? Or...did he actually finish it?) and since he is funny, and I occasionally try to be funny, I had to adopt him as my forum persona. Thanks for noticing!
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He DID pass the bar! To prove to himself that law was an option for him, and that he was choosing his other career. He finished the zombie novel, yep :)
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Hang in there.
When my daughter was an infant, I mentioned to one of my friends with several older kids that I was less than pleased about late night feedings and constant diaper changing and looking forward to my daughter being old enough to sail, and do other things with me (as his did). He said: "My advice is to focus on enjoying the things you can do with your daughter right now rather than what you can do in the future. The future will come, but you'll never have this time again. Don't waste it."
He was right. My daughter is older now, and we enjoy doing things together. But I look back on when she was an infant and along with the sleep deprivation, diaper changes, and suits with white stains on the left shoulder, I remember that first smile, the first words, the first steps, and a lot of little things that will never come again.
If you haven't already done it, make more time for yourself by giving up on most things that aren't about your baby. Let your housekeeping and minor chores go by the wayside. Catch up on your own sleep and life by napping or working out.
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Hang in there.
When my daughter was an infant, I mentioned to one of my friends with several older kids that I was less than pleased about late night feedings and constant diaper changing and looking forward to my daughter being old enough to sail, and do other things with me (as his did). He said: "My advice is to focus on enjoying the things you can do with your daughter right now rather than what you can do in the future. The future will come, but you'll never have this time again. Don't waste it."
He was right. My daughter is older now, and we enjoy doing things together. But I look back on when she was an infant and along with the sleep deprivation, diaper changes, and suits with white stains on the left shoulder, I remember that first smile, the first words, the first steps, and a lot of little things that will never come again.
If you haven't already done it, make more time for yourself by giving up on most things that aren't about your baby. Let your housekeeping and minor chores go by the wayside. Catch up on your own sleep and life by napping or working out.
This is really nice :)
I often remind myself: she will never be as small as she is today!
And on the internet I read: this too, shall pass (the bad AND the good!).
So I am trying not to wish my days away, even though I really really miss sleep ;)
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5 months is a tough stage. I remember sleep being the all consuming "thing" we revolved our lives around. I was insane about naps.
My all time favourite age so far has been age 2. So much sweetness. Every thing they do is cute, even when they're being little jerks. We all laughed so much during this stage. I have a two year old right now, and he bring so much joy to the household. I want to bottle this time up and never forget it. The unprompted hugs and kisses, the pure happiness on their faces when you come home from work... it doesn't last forever. Such a special time!
All of the ages are great though. It's pretty amazing to get to watch your babies grow up into independent little beings. I can honestly say I have enjoyed every age so far. I am bracing myself for the teen years, but I'm feeling optimistic about that too.
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My all time favourite age so far has been age 2. So much sweetness. Every thing they do is cute, even when they're being little jerks. We all laughed so much during this stage. I have a two year old right now, and he bring so much joy to the household. I want to bottle this time up and never forget it. The unprompted hugs and kisses, the pure happiness on their faces when you come home from work... it doesn't last forever. Such a special time!
This is where I am right now. So good.
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My all time favourite age so far has been age 2. So much sweetness. Every thing they do is cute, even when they're being little jerks. We all laughed so much during this stage. I have a two year old right now, and he bring so much joy to the household. I want to bottle this time up and never forget it. The unprompted hugs and kisses, the pure happiness on their faces when you come home from work... it doesn't last forever. Such a special time!
This is where I am right now. So good.
It really is. If we were all our two year old selves, think of how great the world would be. Er, actually it could be a bit of a nightmare, but we'd be SO cute.
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My all time favourite age so far has been age 2. So much sweetness. Every thing they do is cute, even when they're being little jerks. We all laughed so much during this stage. I have a two year old right now, and he bring so much joy to the household. I want to bottle this time up and never forget it. The unprompted hugs and kisses, the pure happiness on their faces when you come home from work... it doesn't last forever. Such a special time!
This is where I am right now. So good.
It really is. If we were all our two year old selves, think of how great the world would be. Er, actually it could be a bit of a nightmare, but we'd be SO cute.
We'd spend all our time point out school buses (just my kid?) and society probably collapse, but we'd be happy!
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My kids are 6 and almost 10 and I have to say ages 4 onwards have been my favorites so far. I found 3 really really hard with both kids. Babyhood and toddlerhood was hard too. But these ages are great. I especially love being able to share more and more cultural references with my almost 10 year old who is a read-a-holic. And the 6 year old is turning into a delighful person too.
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I wasn't a fan of the baby/toddler years (like at all), but age 4 and up have just gotten better and better. DD entering elementary school was probably the biggest game changer. She is 10 now and it feels simply amazing. She's getting more independent (occasional sleepovers, playing outside with friends by themselves, etc.) but she also still holds my hand when we walk and is super snuggly at bedtime, which I love. She's super smart and gets my humor and there is no one else on earth I would rather spend time with (if I can't have solitude, which would be my first choice;-). One of my favorite things is when she likes an outfit I'm wearing she'll say "mom, make sure you save that one for me when I get older". Best compliment ever.
In hindsight, I wish DH and I wouldn't have been so stressed out during the baby/toddler years. We only have one, so we didn't get the benefit of that realization for a second go. We were just super stressed the entire time, and now I just laugh about how ridiculous we were.
I would highly recommend prioritizing sleep, any kind of relaxation, and physical movement (walking, playing, etc.) over all else. You can save being tidy, looking fashionable, cooking amazing meals, etc. for a later stage of your family life.
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I wasn't a fan of the baby/toddler years (like at all), but age 4 and up have just gotten better and better. DD entering elementary school was probably the biggest game changer. She is 10 now and it feels simply amazing. She's getting more independent (occasional sleepovers, playing outside with friends by themselves, etc.) but she also still holds my hand when we walk and is super snuggly at bedtime, which I love. She's super smart and gets my humor and there is no one else on earth I would rather spend time with (if I can't have solitude, which would be my first choice;-). One of my favorite things is when she likes an outfit I'm wearing she'll say "mom, make sure you save that one for me when I get older". Best compliment ever.
In hindsight, I wish DH and I wouldn't have been so stressed out during the baby/toddler years. We only have one, so we didn't get the benefit of that realization for a second go. We were just super stressed the entire time, and now I just laugh about how ridiculous we were.
I would highly recommend prioritizing sleep, any kind of relaxation, and physical movement (walking, playing, etc.) over all else. You can save being tidy, looking fashionable, cooking amazing meals, etc. for a later stage of your family life.
Good advice!
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With the benefit of hindsight, I liked age 3-5 best (but actually, having a sensible, interesting, pleasant 18 year old is also pretty good.)
First few months is very tough, no doubt about it. Physically demanding, no sleep, stressful. Again, with the benefit of hindsight, it is all over very quickly - just doesn't seem that way at the time.
“The days are long and the years are short” :)
I've also heard "All Joy and No Fun" which I found to be pretty accurate in the very young years. There are moments of deep and intense joy around parenting but the constant "on-ness" of it in the young years was very hard for me. Now that mine are a little more independent (6 and 4) I am able to find the fun because it get breaks.
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My kids are 7, 9, and 11. They are a true joy at these ages. I love to see them climbing trees--the higher the better. I love to talk to them. They're funny and thoughtful. They no longer throw things in anger, much anyway. They're all out of diapers and can stand long car rides. They choose their own music to play. The oldest painted his own room recently--the trim is a bit of a mess but he did it himself. He's fun--I swear I can read his mind sometimes. My 9 year old's smile can light up the room, and she can scale a straight lamppost in seconds. My youngest loves me to read to him and makes friends wherever we go. I can sleep on weekends until 8am--they can feed themselves in the mornings. They can even put themselves to bed if necessary, although I usually read to the younger two at bedtime and have "small talk" with the oldest--his choice of words. They are still young enough to cuddle (well, not my oldest so much, but he'll sit close to me on the couch, which is his way of cuddling) and will hold my hand while we're out. But when we get to a park, they run ahead of me to climb or play or make "temporary friends" (my daughter's choice of words). I can take them all with me to run into a store for one thing and it can actually happen without whining!
When I see moms out with babies, I smile and think, "I'm so glad I'm done with that stage." I loved the baby and toddler and preschool years, but I also cried a lot if I'm being completely honest. I think in hindsight I'm just not a baby person. I never want to hold someone else's baby. I loved holding my own, though, and I found wraps and babyslings to be a godsend. I remember being tired a lot, too--my kids are about 2 years apart and all nursed for almost 2 years, which means I was either pregnant or nursing or both for 7 years.
I think 4 and 5 year olds are the funniest people on earth. So many great ideas and comments from them. I tried to write a bunch down but could never catch them all. I remember not wanting my then-5-year-old to have to start 5-day kindergarten--I loved having him around to talk to on my two weekdays at home.
Two year olds are fun, but two of mine were tough at that age--when they weren't being adorable. I gave myself time-out sometimes to go punch my bed so I could get out my parenting frustrations without strangling anyone. I also found that when my 2-year old was being a PITA, I could switch up her mood by scooping her up and dancing around and kissing her. Dressing a two-year old is like dressing an octopus. But snuggling with a two-year-old child is so beautiful I could cry remembering it.
I am now in the golden years, which happens randomly at different ages for different families. Two years ago, a mom of older kids told me I was in the golden years of parenting and to enjoy it. She said this at a birthday party where one of my kids was having a meltdown and crying under the table because he got the "wrong" lunch order, another one was unhappy for being snubbed by the birthday girl, and the third was jumping all over the restaurant and causing a scene and probably trying to draw penises on the booths--I kept having to take the crayons away from him. I just nodded and said, "uh-huh, sure." But now I look back at that day and laugh.
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We have a 3 yo and a 1 yo. So far, for both kids, I dreaded 0-9mo. I really do enjoy 9mo-18mo as other's have mentioned. 2yo - 3yo so far has been a lot of "NO!" and "Buy Why??????", but still much better than 0-9mo IMO.
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My kids are 7, 9, and 11. They are a true joy at these ages. I love to see them climbing trees--the higher the better. I love to talk to them. They're funny and thoughtful. They no longer throw things in anger, much anyway. They're all out of diapers and can stand long car rides. They choose their own music to play. The oldest painted his own room recently--the trim is a bit of a mess but he did it himself. He's fun--I swear I can read his mind sometimes. My 9 year old's smile can light up the room, and she can scale a straight lamppost in seconds. My youngest loves me to read to him and makes friends wherever we go. I can sleep on weekends until 8am--they can feed themselves in the mornings. They can even put themselves to bed if necessary, although I usually read to the younger two at bedtime and have "small talk" with the oldest--his choice of words. They are still young enough to cuddle (well, not my oldest so much, but he'll sit close to me on the couch, which is his way of cuddling) and will hold my hand while we're out. But when we get to a park, they run ahead of me to climb or play or make "temporary friends" (my daughter's choice of words). I can take them all with me to run into a store for one thing and it can actually happen without whining!
When I see moms out with babies, I smile and think, "I'm so glad I'm done with that stage." I loved the baby and toddler and preschool years, but I also cried a lot if I'm being completely honest. I think in hindsight I'm just not a baby person. I never want to hold someone else's baby. I loved holding my own, though, and I found wraps and babyslings to be a godsend. I remember being tired a lot, too--my kids are about 2 years apart and all nursed for almost 2 years, which means I was either pregnant or nursing or both for 7 years.
I think 4 and 5 year olds are the funniest people on earth. So many great ideas and comments from them. I tried to write a bunch down but could never catch them all. I remember not wanting my then-5-year-old to have to start 5-day kindergarten--I loved having him around to talk to on my two weekdays at home.
Two year olds are fun, but two of mine were tough at that age--when they weren't being adorable. I gave myself time-out sometimes to go punch my bed so I could get out my parenting frustrations without strangling anyone. I also found that when my 2-year old was being a PITA, I could switch up her mood by scooping her up and dancing around and kissing her. Dressing a two-year old is like dressing an octopus. But snuggling with a two-year-old child is so beautiful I could cry remembering it.
I am now in the golden years, which happens randomly at different ages for different families. Two years ago, a mom of older kids told me I was in the golden years of parenting and to enjoy it. She said this at a birthday party where one of my kids was having a meltdown and crying under the table because he got the "wrong" lunch order, another one was unhappy for being snubbed by the birthday girl, and the third was jumping all over the restaurant and causing a scene and probably trying to draw penises on the booths--I kept having to take the crayons away from him. I just nodded and said, "uh-huh, sure." But now I look back at that day and laugh.
What a beautiful breakdown!
Reminds me of when I asked my grandmother, when she was in her 90’s, what her favourite age (time in her life) has been. She responded without hesitation: “Oh, when the kids were little.”
Uhm what?!! She had four kids, and no help!
But I’m starting to see. These are the best years to remember ;)
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We have a 3 yo and a 1 yo. So far, for both kids, I dreaded 0-9mo. I really do enjoy 9mo-18mo as other's have mentioned. 2yo - 3yo so far has been a lot of "NO!" and "Buy Why??????", but still much better than 0-9mo IMO.
My baby is just about to hit 10 months. Some things are easier! Good to hear up to age 1.5 is nice :)
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I was widowed when my bio kids were 1 and 5 and then adopted my teenage daughter. Though at times I was crazed with grief and the overwhelming responsibility of providing for my family and making every single parenting decision alone, I had to make peace with it and embrace my single parent status. I've enjoyed most ages, 4 year olds are fantastic, they're curious and you can reason with them. For whatever reason, 7 year olds are great and I love 11 year olds. I've been fortunate to have pretty easy and fun kids (thank you, Universe) and fingers crossed, hope the next stage of my 11 and 15 year old kids' go smoothly and pleasantly.
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I also enjoyed around 5.5 to 11.5 months. Toddlers I honestly am not loving... But my daughter isn't that bad. I'm just pregnant and going crazy though. 😑