Author Topic: Potty training and going out?  (Read 1642 times)

jeromedawg

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Potty training and going out?
« on: June 30, 2018, 01:41:49 PM »
Hey all,

We're starting to 'slowly' train our older one with potty training. Honestly, we have no idea what we're doing... he is still wearing diapers and we're at the point where he tells he needs to pee so we'll have him sit on his little trainer toilet and go. He won't go #2 though and continues to #2 in his diaper and doesn't tell us if he needs to go. He'll pretty much only tell us that he needs to pee.

The challenge that we haven't thought much about is how to deal with this when we're out for extended periods of time and don't have his trainer (it's not intended to take with I'm pretty certain, even though it's easy to carry and all plastic - but it would be weird just carrying that around with us wherever we go). My wife was saying to just bring a bottle or jar but I'm not sure how well that would work out LOL. We've tried having him use public restrooms but I think he doesn't like it. The first time he went with my wife and was OK. But when I tried to take him he refused... of course, it was a beach bathroom and was pretty filthy that day so maybe he got grossed out?


Any suggestions and tips on 1) what to do about him learning to #2 in the potty and then 2) what to do about when he says he needs to go while we're out (especially if he's averse to public restrooms).

YttriumNitrate

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #1 on: June 30, 2018, 01:52:50 PM »
I have a three year old boy in basically the same situation where he's fantastic in regards to #1, but not #2.

Have you tried having him stand up pee? Once my son started doing that, there was no going back to sitting down. My son is small for his age (10th percentile), but he's able to use most urinals if he stands on my shoes. He also thinks the automatic flush sensors are super cool.

Cranky

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #2 on: July 01, 2018, 02:00:39 PM »
There are small one piece potties you can keep in the car. There are also folding potty seats that you can put right into your diaper bag/tote/large purse. Be sure you have wipes, a plastic bag for wet clothes, and some extra pants.

This too shall pass!

MrsWolfeRN

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #3 on: July 01, 2018, 06:43:45 PM »
Mine will poop on the potty most of the time but not pee. He grunts and carries on when he needs to poop so it is more like EC than actual potty training.Today I left his pants off and put him on the potty every half hour. I tried bribery too. He held it for four hours before peeing on the floor. I have also tried getting him to pee standing up outside. There have been times when he has woken up dry from a nap, sat on the potty and did nothing, then peed in his pull up ten minutes later. He is three years and three months.

goatmom

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #4 on: July 02, 2018, 06:08:26 AM »
I always kept one of those small one piece potties with me in the car.  That way - I could just pull in anywhere and let the kid use it.  Often - I didn't want the kid using public restroom.  Just too gross and I felt more comfortable doing it this way.  Agree with above poster - this too shall pass.

Jen

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #5 on: July 02, 2018, 08:20:17 AM »
Highly recommend reading Oh Crap Potty Training and changing your approach.  The book lays out exactly what to do and covers all sorts of situations.  Available at your library, of course (not a book you necessarily need to own!).  Good luck!

mxt0133

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #6 on: July 02, 2018, 09:04:27 AM »
With regard to getting them to go #2 on the toilet, my wife literally bribed my first born with a cookie if he went #2 on the toilet.  At the time I was against it and started forcasting that it would escalate into me having to buy him a car to go to college.  It worked and she only had to do it one time and show him that he could do it.  We have not have to bribe him or his two siblings since.  I think he would have eventually been able to do it on his own, but getting to out of diapers is worth a dozen cookies in my opinion.


zhelud

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #7 on: July 02, 2018, 11:54:12 AM »
Heh heh- my older son absolutely refused to do either #1 or #2 anywhere but in his own little potty for something like 6-8 months. We either had to bring his potty with him (fine for a trip to grandma but difficult anywhere else) or let him wear a pullup. Would not even stand and pee. It was incredibly frustrating even though I knew that this too would pass.  Then one day, the contractor who was working on our house brought over a Dons Johns for his workers and put it in the yard. My son decided that he had to try going potty there- and afterwards he suddenly had no fear of "foreign" potties.
   

sneeds

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #8 on: July 02, 2018, 12:06:11 PM »
I would also recommend the book Oh Crap Potty Training. We followed that approach with both my children and it worked great.

For a little while after we potty trained, I would carry the little plastic training potty in our car if we were going on a longer drive or somewhere where there may not be a toilet nearby, since even after they are potty trained you sometimes only have short notice before they need to go. We have pulled over on the side of the road or in empty parking lots to let our toddlers out of the car and have them go on the little training potty. Then simply pour the pee out in the grass or a nearby bush and wipe the potty down with a lysol wipe. Though it's not meant to be a travel potty, there's no reason why it can't be brought along in the beginning while they're newly potty trained.

jeromedawg

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #9 on: July 02, 2018, 06:31:14 PM »
Highly recommend reading Oh Crap Potty Training and changing your approach.  The book lays out exactly what to do and covers all sorts of situations.  Available at your library, of course (not a book you necessarily need to own!).  Good luck!

Thanks! I just placed a hold on the book. For the Los Angeles Public Libraries there are 15 ppl ahead of me waiting for the audiobook and 30 ahead of me waiting for the ebook :T By the time I actually have it, he'll be done LOL. For the Orange County Public Libraries, they just don't have the book available at all. I guess this book is super popular :T

kimmarg

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #10 on: July 02, 2018, 07:54:37 PM »
We are also in the process of potty training. At home and at daycare DD wears undies and if they get wet we change. If we are headed out for a shorter excursion (library, store, anything 1-2 hour  MAX) we go right before we leave and then bring a change of clothes. For longer car rides, airplane we just used a diaper.   Haven't had too much of an issue wtih public restrooms.  I just put her on the toilet sideways and hold her. It might help that at home she uses the adult toilet. I've never seen the point in those separate pottys. The goal is to NOT deal with my kids pee and poop if possible! We got this from amazon. Not only do you not have to deal with the pee the kid gets used to the normal toilet.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00EPET9SQ/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&psc=1

formerlydivorcedmom

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #11 on: July 03, 2018, 09:06:30 AM »
I had a foldable potty seat for my kids - https://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/store/product/primo-folding-potty-seat-with-handles/1014909486?skuId=14909486&mcid=PS_googlepla_nonbrand_baby_online&product_id=14909486&adtype=pla&product_channel=online&adpos=1o4&creative=224283462376&device=c&matchtype=&network=g&mrkgadid=627320123&mrkgcl=609&rkg_id=h-770b64cd79e61a3152d280f3adfcd420_t-1530630243&gclid=Cj0KCQjwvezZBRDkARIsADKQyPmxmwJ3K_eaTBfg4M-TQyBWS0-gNcX_rjrldOjTsO7a0I9vW_7eyMEaAo1PEALw_wcB

My daughter was great about using this with the store toilets.  My son was TERRIFIED of store restrooms.  Absolutely terrified.  The toilets were bigger and the flush sound was so loud that it made him cry.  [We found out later that he should have had tubes in his ears from toddlerhood - the store potties were the only ones he could hear flush, and he didn't think that toilets were supposed to do that.  He thought it was going to eat him.]

So good luck!

jeromedawg

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #12 on: September 06, 2018, 06:35:18 PM »
I can't believe I posted this question back in June. Since then we've been battling with our son on potty training. He has been OK with #1 but inconsistent and more on the stubbornly defiant side with #2s. He knows he should go in the potty but is perfectly fine letting them out in his underwear. Given what we're going through, I find it incredibly difficult to believe anyone who claims to have done this in 3 days to a week's time... even if it means "staying at home with the kid the entire day" - both my wife and I are at home (I work from home and she's SAHM) so I don't think that's the key.

Anyway, it's super frustrating getting him to go #2 at home in his potty. We bought a smaller toilet seat retrofit thing for public restrooms but I find it tedious - I stand him up on the toilet when he needs to go #1 because I can't stand the thought of him sitting on public restroom seats and his legs and hands touching the sides. Call me an OCD Germaphobe but I'm pretty sure the sides of the toilet are FILTHY (we're talking about mens restrooms here BTW). He has major stage fright even in public bathrooms - sometimes he'll go and sometimes he won't.

We were at Ikea last week and had to make 5 trips to the bathroom for him to #1 and #2 and he ends up #2ing in his pants on the showroom floor.... smh

moof

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #13 on: September 07, 2018, 04:45:58 PM »
My advice is not to sweat things.  Definitely go easy on the little tike, and let him help guide things no matter how frustrated you are.

We had a portable potty, but barely used it.  A adapter on the regular toilet worked at home, and he quickly figured out how to sit ont he edge without an adapter for public restrooms.

Our kiddo had all the mechanics figured out around 2.5 and had been really excited about the cool underwear we bought him, but once the novelty was gone he reverted (normal for him on many subjects).  He then went to the underwear for the daytime and a diaper at night.  We just went with it, and one day several months he said he wanted to just wear underwear.  He wanted company when going #2 for sure.  A while later he spontaneously starting standing for #1 (much to my wife's chagrin).

We have had a total of about 4 or 5 total accidents (including nighttime ones) though age 5, don't fret if yours has much more difficulty.  Yelling, getting upset, or otherwise making the potty a stressful subject only stands to makes things worse in the long term.

Do bring sticky notes to cover the sensors in public bathrooms.  It sucks to stand there with your hand over the thing while the little guy bears down.


Margie

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #14 on: September 08, 2018, 01:24:10 PM »
So I am totally jet lagged and reading anything to avoid the laundry!  My kids are 16 and 13....

My 16 year old (son) took 6 weeks at 2.5 to train reasonably.  Meaning he had lots of accidents...my mistakes included rushing him (I was due to have second child and didn't want two in diapers) and using pull ups (so he didn't really feel the UGH of accidents)...I also sang and read to him potty books, etc...

I had success once I got rid of pull ups, bribed him with chocolate small ones for pee, big ones for poop and tried to relax about it.  I let him pee on trees and fences anytime he wanted.

Two funny stories now but stressful when they happened:  one he was pooping in a public bathroom and I was crouched on floor holding him up.   I was hugely pregnant so I shifted my weight and the automatic toilet flushed with him on it.  He screamed like I was killing him.  Two: in an airplane, he said he had to go to the bathroom so I took him to bathroom.  It was very loud so he wouldn't go.  I didn't want him to have an accident on the plane so I tried to hold him down.  He was freaking out and it took a good 15 minutes for him to finish.   We left the restroom with me bleeding from his nails trying to claw past me and my hair all over the place.  Fun times!!

My daughter on the other hand, trained at 18 months in three days!!  She simply stated she wanted to sit on potty and pee "I sit I pee"  So I put her on it and she did.  I think she had one accident.

It was surreal.  I think the differences included that my daughter was dry at nap times so her bladder was better and she had her brother who she always wanted to be like and it wasn't on our radar so there was no stress. 

I think if I had let my son start when he was ready (probably closer to three) it wouldn't have been so stressful.

Anyhow, enjoy every funny moment they pass much too quickly!!

KS

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #15 on: September 10, 2018, 10:59:00 PM »
+1 to the Oh Crap book! Given to me by a friend after she used it with much success, and worked great for us too! And many others at our preschool once word got out both from me and a few experienced parents.

We have the OXO folding potty seat and I'm so glad we got it because our daughter is super scared of almost any unfamiliar toilet since she doesn't know how loud the flush will be. So we still carry that with us anytime we travel or will be out long enough to need to go. It is light and probably takes up less space in our backpack than her changing station thing with diapers in it did. Great for parks that don't have restrooms too. She won't use the option where you fold it out as a size adjuster for a big toilet yet since she's scared, but for kids without that hangup it's nice it can do that too, and that way doesn't use up the bags.

lazy-saver

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #16 on: September 12, 2018, 11:52:24 AM »
I'm reading Oh Crap now and it seems pretty good.

Except... she recommends keeping a potty in the car for at least a month. The problem is we don't have the car in the afternoons, and it's going to be hard enough keeping my son away from the playground for a whole day or a few, and waiting for however long it takes to be able to hold it for five minutes while we walk back to the house doesn't seem at all reasonable.

I've never seen anyone use a potty at the park or otherwise in public so I don't want to so that. Our park doesn't have trees to go behind.

Anyone else had a problem like this? What did you do?

KS

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #17 on: September 12, 2018, 03:52:02 PM »
I'm reading Oh Crap now and it seems pretty good.

Except... she recommends keeping a potty in the car for at least a month. The problem is we don't have the car in the afternoons, and it's going to be hard enough keeping my son away from the playground for a whole day or a few, and waiting for however long it takes to be able to hold it for five minutes while we walk back to the house doesn't seem at all reasonable.

I've never seen anyone use a potty at the park or otherwise in public so I don't want to so that. Our park doesn't have trees to go behind.

Anyone else had a problem like this? What did you do?

Most of our park outings were also walking, we just brought the folding potty in our backpack and put it out somewhere handy where she could run to it if she needed. She was young enough not to care about privacy, actually kind of the opposite since she was proud of her new skill. But I have also seen a nanny bring one of those little play tents and set up the potty in that, for slightly older kids or ones who otherwise want more privacy. I thought that was a pretty good solution and was prepared to try it if we had needed to.

Also, our experience and that of friends was that the kids actually had longer warning time quicker than she says in the book. I think she kind of gives the worst case scenario so you will be prepared if your kid is on that end of the range, but there's a good chance they'll surprise you with how long they can hold it once they get the hang of things. Now that we're pretty well established I still take the potty for longer outings but if we have her go right before we leave then we rarely need it even if we're out for a couple hours.

lazy-saver

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #18 on: September 12, 2018, 04:52:29 PM »
I'm reading Oh Crap now and it seems pretty good.

Except... she recommends keeping a potty in the car for at least a month. The problem is we don't have the car in the afternoons, and it's going to be hard enough keeping my son away from the playground for a whole day or a few, and waiting for however long it takes to be able to hold it for five minutes while we walk back to the house doesn't seem at all reasonable.

I've never seen anyone use a potty at the park or otherwise in public so I don't want to so that. Our park doesn't have trees to go behind.

Anyone else had a problem like this? What did you do?

Most of our park outings were also walking, we just brought the folding potty in our backpack and put it out somewhere handy where she could run to it if she needed. She was young enough not to care about privacy, actually kind of the opposite since she was proud of her new skill. But I have also seen a nanny bring one of those little play tents and set up the potty in that, for slightly older kids or ones who otherwise want more privacy. I thought that was a pretty good solution and was prepared to try it if we had needed to.

Also, our experience and that of friends was that the kids actually had longer warning time quicker than she says in the book. I think she kind of gives the worst case scenario so you will be prepared if your kid is on that end of the range, but there's a good chance they'll surprise you with how long they can hold it once they get the hang of things. Now that we're pretty well established I still take the potty for longer outings but if we have her go right before we leave then we rarely need it even if we're out for a couple hours.

My concern isn't with my son wanting privacy. I'm worried about what other parents will think, since no one else seems to do this. I'm also worried about other younger toddlers playing with it if we set it out.

Glad to hear that the period of needing a potty available immediately isn't generally as extreme as she makes it out.

KS

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #19 on: September 12, 2018, 10:17:07 PM »
Makes sense! I had seen a few other parents in our area do it so didn't have to worry about that but could see how some places might be different. Mostly the response we got from parents was a lot of "Where did you get that? I want one!"
We did have one incident when a little bigger kid went and kicked a bunch of sand into it. And for sure a lot of little ones kind of gravitated over to it to see what it was though their parents always caught them before they got there. If you keep a fresh bag set up in it when it's folded in the backpack you can get it out and set up pretty fast if you decide to try it and want to avoid tampering.

sandyvanburen

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #20 on: September 13, 2018, 06:59:08 AM »
I would suggest toilet training him straight away. We (only have one child) trained ours for the potty first too but then found out that getting her on the toilet was like having to start all over again.

And I would suggest no more diapers during the day, when he's at home. Also during his nap, no diapers. Just tell him to go before bed and explain that if he goes in his sleep, he'll be very, very wet.

We've had 2 accidents (one #1 and one #2). Yes it was messy (and a bit stinky) but we were prepared for it (protected the mattres) and it only took 3 days before she was dry during naps and after a week she requested we leave the diaper off at bed time, telling us: "Really, I can do it!"

We had a picture book that we read to her about potty training and this helped a lot too, I think.
BTW: she was 2,5 when we trained her.

seattlecyclone

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #21 on: September 13, 2018, 10:58:24 AM »
We used the Oh Crap book too. The first couple days were intense with accidents everywhere. After that our son really started to get it pretty quickly, faster for pee than poop. We'd make sure to dress him in pants with elastic around the ankles when going out, just in case there was a random poop accident somewhere. The parks closest to our house have actual bathrooms near the playgrounds, so we didn't need to carry a whole potty around and have him go in the middle of the park; we'd just bring the top part and set it on top of the toilet. Occasional accidents for the first couple of months are normal. Bring a backup set of pants/shoes/socks when possible.

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #22 on: September 13, 2018, 11:10:23 AM »
Highly recommend reading Oh Crap Potty Training and changing your approach.  The book lays out exactly what to do and covers all sorts of situations.  Available at your library, of course (not a book you necessarily need to own!).  Good luck!

Thanks! I just placed a hold on the book. For the Los Angeles Public Libraries there are 15 ppl ahead of me waiting for the audiobook and 30 ahead of me waiting for the ebook :T By the time I actually have it, he'll be done LOL. For the Orange County Public Libraries, they just don't have the book available at all. I guess this book is super popular :T

There are some on amazon for $4, with shipping- that would be under $8 and you can sell it when you are done.

lazy-saver

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #23 on: September 13, 2018, 12:39:28 PM »
Makes sense! I had seen a few other parents in our area do it so didn't have to worry about that but could see how some places might be different. Mostly the response we got from parents was a lot of "Where did you get that? I want one!"
We did have one incident when a little bigger kid went and kicked a bunch of sand into it. And for sure a lot of little ones kind of gravitated over to it to see what it was though their parents always caught them before they got there. If you keep a fresh bag set up in it when it's folded in the backpack you can get it out and set up pretty fast if you decide to try it and want to avoid tampering.

Thanks. Keeping it in the bag and being ready to get it out seems like a good solution.

lazy-saver

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Re: Potty training and going out?
« Reply #24 on: September 13, 2018, 12:45:26 PM »
Just slightly off topic for this thread, does anyone have books for kids recommendations? "Monster Munch" - most of which is about different shaped foods but the last page is about poop - inspired our most recent brief interest in the potty. So I was thinking we should get some potty books when we're ready to so this seriously, but a lot of them feature things like wearing a diaper which isn't how we're planning to do things.