Author Topic: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time  (Read 12486 times)

Guses

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DW and I have had our first child last summer (coming up on 8 months now). We gave birth to a happy and healthy little boy.

While we (expectedly) did not sleep alot in the first four months, months 4 and 5 were really nice with our baby waking up only once or twice to feed (mother's milk only).

In a complete reversal, going on two months now, our baby wakes up almost HOURLY each night and often is unable to go back to sleep for long periods (mostly 11PM-3AM). A typical night would be him going to sleep at 8PM, awake 10h00-10h30, awake 12PM-3AM, awake 5h-5h30, end of sleep 6h30-7h30.

We don't know if it is behaviour related or if there is an underlying cause for all this. We went to the doctor because he tends to snore (which is abnormal in babies) and the doctor told us that there is a possibility for his adenoid tissues to be inflammed which would make him have apnea attacks which could contribute to the waking. Also, he his teething his first tooth right now which appears to be painful.

DW is opposed to using the crying method (i.e., let him learn to fall asleep on his own) until we rule out any physiological impairments.

While my wife is still on mat leave (she does most of the heavy lifting at night), we are very apprehensive of her return to work as there is no way we can be functional with a screwed up sleep pattern like this.

MayDay

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #1 on: March 17, 2015, 02:44:58 PM »
I'm very anti-CIO until at least a year. That said at some point you start to lose your mind from lack of sleep.

When we attacked DS's awful sleep habits we used this: http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html

straycat

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #2 on: March 17, 2015, 02:56:35 PM »
Don't worry about mat leave ending yet - she has a couple of months to go right? The most important thing to remember with a baby - every stage is TEMPORARY. The crying it out never worked for me. Teething - I had no problem using orajel or other ones on their gums to reduce/relieve pain. Do you use a mobile? That helped mine. Do you go in right away when he cries or do you wait a little bit? Does he use a soother?

Guses

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #3 on: March 17, 2015, 03:11:15 PM »
@MayDay 

Thanks for the good read. It gives us an alternative option to try out.

@straycat

Yes, we still have 4 months left on DW mat leave, at which point we/I will be taking my yearly vacation to add a few more weeks.

The fact that the situation is temporary is probably the only thing keeping us sane at this point!

We do use orajel for his teething but we have trouble seeing whether it has an effect or not. There has been no change in his waking pattern.

We had a mobile on top of his crib but we removed it because he his now able to reach the toys (and strong enough to grab and rip them off too!). We try to keep is room as dark as possible so as not to reinforce playing during sleep time. He will sometimes wake up and just play in his bed for 1hr+ and then start crying when he is ready to go to sleep.

We don't use a pacifier (he does not want to use it the few times we presented it to him) but we have a plush animal that my wife has impregnated with her smell to soothe him.

Thegoblinchief

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #4 on: March 17, 2015, 08:44:42 PM »
Cloves/clove oil is actually a lot more effective than Orajel.

Have you tried seeing if co-sleeping helps? We weren't co-sleepers at all until #3 suddenly had a huge sleep pattern reversal. Kids are weird and their habits can break amazingly fast.

I know co-sleeping with littlies has its own challenges.

gooki

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #5 on: March 18, 2015, 02:56:33 AM »
I'd recommend co-sleeping if you are not already.

ltt

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #6 on: March 18, 2015, 04:34:08 AM »
How much is your baby sleeping/napping during the day?  If it is a lot, maybe shorten those naps.  Can you change that bedtime pattern back a little at a time.  So, for instance, if the baby usually goes to sleep at 8:00 p.m., can you start putting him down at 8:15 and then slowly keep changing the time until his bedtime is maybe 9:30 or 10:00 and see if that helps him sleep through the night.

nora

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #7 on: March 18, 2015, 05:32:37 AM »
Has your doctor referred you to see an ear/nose/throat surgeon about the snoring issue?

Our daughter didn't sleep consistently well until she was two years old, so I feel your pain. I coped better once I started reading about how normal it is. I thought it must be something we did wrong with managing her at night. I wasn't able to let her cry on her own, so that probably contributed.

I used the jay gordon night weaning technique once she was a year old which miraculously worked and stopped the frequent waking for feeds. But she still woke a lot in the next year too, just less than before.

Then she changed again at age two. We stopped going into her room then, and just called the same soothing sentence from outside instead, which might have helped reassure her without rewarding her if you believe that stuff.

11ducks

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #8 on: March 18, 2015, 05:44:32 AM »
My sympathies- my son was a 2-4am waker every night- I remember watching a LOT of bad foreign/religious shows and paid advertisements during those times.
There may be something waking him (certainly follow that up), but it may just be a stage. Sometimes babies kinda suck (adorable as they are).
It can help to feed them in dim light, and not make direct eye contact (so they don't think 2am is play time?).

I also second co sleeping, assuming you aren't in a high Risk group (overweight, smoker drinker heavy sleeper).

Good luck with it, I promise it will pass.

straycat

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #9 on: March 18, 2015, 07:26:19 AM »
I agree that sadly, it may just be a stage and nothing you can do. Good luck. My son slept through at 3 months old then had a stay in hospital (over Christmas! his first!) when he got bronchiolitis. All sleeping through got totally forgotten. Do you use a monitor? If you are on the same level, I suggest turning it off. If he cries, you'll hear him. You don't need to be wakened by any other noises.

RelaxedGal

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #10 on: March 18, 2015, 08:18:54 AM »
We gave our daughter Advil before bed when she was teething.  Advil = 6 hours of sleep, Tylenol = only 4.  Orajel was good for the 20 minutes it took for the Advil to kick in. 

On the snoring side: My friend's son had enlarged adenoids.  They won't remove them until the kid is 2 I think; there's just so little space to move in there!  Once he had them out his quality of life improved significantly; he no longer had dark circles under his eyes, got a quality night's sleep, etc.  Definitely consult with an Ear/Nose/Throat doctor if possible, the snoring is definitely suspect, but be forewarned that they might not be able to do anything for a while.

Guses

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #11 on: March 18, 2015, 10:58:19 AM »
Thanks for all the comments. I will try to address all the questions asked by posters.

We did a little bit of co-sleeping (mom with baby in separate room) earlier but it did not help much in terms of waking or soothing so we stopped doing it. Also, I am a heavy sleeper and I sometimes get night terrors. I would not feel it to be safe to sleep with our baby.

We do have a baby monitor, but we use it only for video (it's an ipcam). We don't go immediately.

We are on the waiting list to see an ORL. Unfortunately, since our case is not an emergency it could take several months before we get to see a doctor. Well, at least it's free.

Our baby usually naps 2 or sometimes 3 naps. One around 8-9AM, one around 12-1PM and one around 3-4PM. Usually they are 45-90 minutes in length. Maybe shifting his going to bed a bit later might help.

I will have to check advil, we have used tylenol successfully a few times when it seemed pretty bad.

One new hypothesis that we have is the possibility of reflux playing a role in his waking pattern. Looking back at our logs, it appears that the sleep disruptions more or less started happening a short time after we started feeding him solids. Also, when he his crying at night, we can't put him down or even rock him to sleep. We have to be standing and "jumping" to soothe him. We will try cutting dairy in mom's diet to see if that could help.

Gin1984

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #12 on: March 18, 2015, 11:18:35 AM »
I think the naps may be the issue (and the early bedtime).  My daughter was taking three naps too, but they were two during daycare time and then a "nap" from 8-9pm and she was up until 10pm-11pm.  That was the only way we could get her to sleep till 6am. 

Meggslynn

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #13 on: March 18, 2015, 12:43:09 PM »
I haven't read any other replies so I am sorry if these have all ready been mentioned.

First get yourself a copy of Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Children. Thee most amazing sleep book out there.

Teething will definitely interrupt sleep so that could be a contributing factor.

Does baby self sooth at all? Do they put themselves to sleep or are they rocked to sleep? Do they have any lovelies? or a soother? Babies need to learn to put themselves back to sleep by themselves.

Give baby at least 5 minutes before you go to them.

Are you giving a bottle or breast milk when they wake? At this age babies do not need to eat at night. Its habit or behavioral at this point.

Write Thyme

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #14 on: March 18, 2015, 05:36:29 PM »
It could be food allergies, but he could just have an upset stomach if he's just being introduced to solids.

Hyland's teething tablets work amazing for my one year old. They dissolve on his tongue. Giving him one usually works instead of the recommended three.

I've found that my son will snore if he's had a particularly rough day/non routine bedtime. (like when he fell asleep in the car or had an uncontrollable crying fit)

I can't remember when my boy was 8 months old, but I do remember periods of time where he would wake up frequently for no apparent reason. He's almost 16 months old now and still wakes up at night.

MayDay

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #15 on: March 19, 2015, 06:32:11 AM »
Dairy removal isn't a bad thing to try, but you could also try to figure out a way for him to sleep more upright, as I believe that is recommended for reflux babies.  The trouble is at 8 months he has probably outgrown many of the newborn-oriented baby holding devices. 

It might be worth a medication trial too.  Reflux is insanely painful. 

For teething, we found that when it got bad (which was frequent for both my kids) ibuprofen was hugely helpful.  All the hippy dippy woo woo stuff did nothing for my kids, they needed the drugs.  And then they would sleep the 4-6 hours until another dose was due, so it was pretty obvious they were in pain.   We would do Tylenol at bedtime, then ibuprofen 4 hours later when we went to bed, in the really bad nights. 

mm1970

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #16 on: March 19, 2015, 12:35:59 PM »
I second Hyland teething tablets.  Big help.  But my son slept great from 3 months to 7 months.  But teething from 7 to 16 months was still BRUTAL

TrMama

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #17 on: March 19, 2015, 01:06:37 PM »
Ditto on the ibuprofen advice. One dose before bed and another if he wakes after 6 hours. My ODD has had issues with her teeth/gums being sore as her 6 year molars have come in. Now that she can express in words how she feels it's reminded me how much that can really hurt.

When my babies were that age I quit nursing them to sleep. I'd actually sit in the dark room nursing them and count to 60 a couple of times. After 2-4 minutes I stopped nursing and put them back in bed. Eight month olds don't need to eat at night, they just need a bit of transition time so they stop feeling hungry in the middle of the night.

brycedoula

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #18 on: March 19, 2015, 01:49:43 PM »
Sweet Sleep - La Leche League International & Diane Wiessinger

The No-Cry Sleep Solution - Elizabeth Pantley & William Sears

I've found these @ my local library. While I don't have kiddos of my own [yet] some of the advice is these books seems pretty practical to me. They are both well reviewed on Amazon (well amazon.ca anyway).

Guses

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #19 on: March 19, 2015, 03:05:11 PM »
@Matt

We are in Canada. The great white North has a truly splendid parental leave system. It is not without costs, but it truly helps having someone at home for the first year.

I did not mention but I also took several weeks when our son was born too. Dads are entitled 5 weeks at 93% pay. I also added 5 weeks of vacay that I had banked for a 10 week stay(!).

Contrary to what my dad did, I do plan to be involved with my kids.
----

We have an appointment with pediatrist (actually it is an appointment so that we may get a referral to see the PD but same difference) next week and will ask about the reflux medication that we could try. Worst case is that it does not work and we stop using it.

We have been reading the No cry sleep solution already, I will give the other book a try. Thanks!

justajane

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #20 on: March 22, 2015, 07:22:00 AM »
All three of our kids were (are - I have a 10 month old) terrible sleepers. We've tried everything except hardcore CIO. We've been to sleep experts at the hospital. Nothing really worked. And when I say bad, I mean waking between 4-15 times a night. Sleeping through the night? Ha!

But you know what? They eventually all sleep - for us, somewhere between the 12-24 months.

I'm not sure what my point here is, except to say that you might not be doing anything "wrong." Most things are a stage, not a sign of impending doom. Some kids are just sucky sleepers. They all eventually sleep. I have had some dark, dark days regarding baby sleep. It's probably the worst thing I have ever experienced. Chronic sleep deprivation is no joke. I have felt like a failure, cursed by god, and like a terrible person because I couldn't handle the stress. We didn't talk about it with our friends and family, because people just couldn't understand how bad it was and why we couldn't find a solution. There's only so many suggestions about a "white noise" machine that you can take before you stop talking about it altogether.

One thing that helped me was Ask Moxie and her discussion of sleep regressions. Here's an example: http://askmoxie.org/blog/2009/03/a-reminder-about-sleep-regressions.html

Also, check out the concept of Wonder Weeks.

Daleth

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #21 on: March 22, 2015, 07:45:39 AM »
I'd recommend co-sleeping if you are not already.

Yeah, honestly, we've started doing that because the twins' sleep patterns got worse recently. It helps A LOT. We figure it's temporary until they reach whatever the next stage is.

fields

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #22 on: March 22, 2015, 10:20:28 AM »
Please don't co-sleep with your baby. I work for CPS.  Babies really do die this way. 

jb14

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #23 on: March 22, 2015, 06:51:49 PM »
I haven't read any other replies so I am sorry if these have all ready been mentioned.

First get yourself a copy of Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Children. Thee most amazing sleep book out there.



This book is a lifesaver, we recommend it to anyone who asks us.

MayDay

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #24 on: March 23, 2015, 10:50:44 AM »
Please don't co-sleep with your baby. I work for CPS.  Babies really do die this way.

They do not (well they occasionally do, but less often than they die in cribs) if you are following all safety precautions:  biological parents only, nursing not formula, no smokers, not under the influence of drugs/alcohol, firm mattress with no blankets near baby, etc.

Babies die in all sorts of situations, but they're less likely to die in a safe family bed than in a lot of other sleeping arrangements.  My aunt died in a crib (sids) but cps doesn't run around screaming to get rid of all cribs.

Eta:  some googling to verify my claims yielded this overview:  http://www.parentingscience.com/bed-sharing.html.  the conclusion is it's definitely safe after 3 months if you follow precautions.
« Last Edit: March 23, 2015, 11:00:40 AM by MayDay »

caliq

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #25 on: March 23, 2015, 08:03:06 PM »
Why on earth does it matter if they're cosleeping with biological parents or not?  Same for nursing? 


Those claims seem incredibly judgmental and aren't mentioned at all in the overview you provided as evidence.

MsFrugalista

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #26 on: March 23, 2015, 08:29:11 PM »
We co-sleep with our almost 3 month old baby and have been since he was two weeks old. It's definitely kept me sane and given me the ability to sleep well (which makes everyone happy :)).
We use this on our bed to lay our baby in. It makes the nightly feedings so much easier and he has been sleeping 5-6 hour stretches now. During the day he sleeps in his bassinet when he's not supervised. We did notice that now that he's becoming more mobile he can roll/shift himself off the co-sleeper, so we don't leave him unattended in it.

To each their own, but co-sleeping has been working great for us.

SisterX

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #27 on: March 23, 2015, 09:33:35 PM »
Sorry, I haven't read all of the replies so someone else might have brought this up, but does the baby sleep in your room?  I ask because my daughter slept in our bed until about 8 or 9 months, when we kicked her out for kicking us all night, then in a crib in our room until about twelve months.  OH MY GOD, having her in the room with us became a nightmare.  It sounds a little like what you're going through now.  We moved her into her own room and all sleep issues resolved themselves within three days.  She's now sleeping like a champ and has been for months.  I guess some babies just need their space.
Also, teething just sucks in general for some babies, as do growth spurts.  If those are problems, Orajel and baby massages are my only recommendations.  There's not too much else you can do.
Lastly, you mentioned snoring.  Has your doctor said anything else about that?  Have you tried changing something in the sleep environment recently?  Even something innocuous.  We didn't realize that we had a humidifier with mold in it until we all got a weird cough which wouldn't go away.  Dumped the humidifier and it was gone.  So you might check unusual sources of discomfort for your child, beyond the white noise/blocking lights stuff.

My sympathies.  Baby sleep problems are the worst, particularly when your child is not only awake all night but crying and screaming at you for hours.  People just don't really get how bad it is because they think, "Well, of course my child didn't sleep either," when they're thinking of normal baby sleep patterns rather than the torture you're enduring.  Clearly, you're not alone, but I know that probably doesn't help much.

MayDay

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #28 on: March 24, 2015, 06:50:44 AM »
Why on earth does it matter if they're cosleeping with biological parents or not?  Same for nursing? 


Those claims seem incredibly judgmental and aren't mentioned at all in the overview you provided as evidence.

You are right that they aren't addressed in the article I linked, but you are wrong about it being judgmental.  It is considered common knowledge about safe cosleeping so I didn't explain it specifically. 

http://cosleeping.nd.edu/safe-co-sleeping-guidelines/. This guy, James McKenna, is a well known baby sleep researcher.  The page I posted says formula fed babies should be on a seperate sleep surface in the same room.  I am sure if you dig through his we page you can find the exact research, but the general idea is that nursing mothers are more attuned to the baby, sleep lighter, and wake more.  And that nursing babies wake more, and are at lower risk of SIDS. 

https://cosleeping.nd.edu/assets/31970/mckenna_why_babies_should_n.pdf. This is a nice overview with citations.  On page 135 is talks about sleeping with a "specific adult caregiver" as a factor in lowering SIDS deaths.  That quote is actually talking about room sharing but not bed sharing.  Further on the same page it gives citations for increased risk of death when sleeping with an adult other than the mother. 

So basically, if you aren't nursing, don't bed share (thus biological parents only in the vast majority of cases, although some adoptive parents induce lactation) and it says father generally but I assume committed caregiver could be substituted, does not initially have the attunement with the infant, but within 3 months develops it.  I found several websites that advised putting baby on the far side of mother, not between mother and father, presumably for that reason. 







justajane

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #29 on: March 24, 2015, 07:26:30 AM »
From what I've read, in most cosleeping deaths there is an extenuating circumstance like alcohol, obesity, medication, and/or an unsafe sleeping environment like a pillowtop or memory foam mattress or lots of blankets.

We coslept out of desperation, and my husband still does now once in a while in the morning with our ten month old, but I have never liked it. I've heard to many horror stories from EMTs and doctors. I would definitely not recommend it before the baby is 3-4 months.

OF COURSE more babies die in the crib, but that's because more babies sleep in a crib in this country. That's the same fuzzy statistics that say that more babies/moms die giving birth at home than do at the hospital.

Daleth

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #30 on: March 24, 2015, 07:36:51 AM »
I found several websites that advised putting baby on the far side of mother, not between mother and father, presumably for that reason.

That's ludicrous. By 5 months most babies can roll over. It's insane to put the baby on the OUTSIDE edge of the bed, where a simple roll could make it plummet three feet or however far to the floor. Skull fractures, anyone?!

justajane

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #31 on: March 24, 2015, 09:06:51 AM »
I found several websites that advised putting baby on the far side of mother, not between mother and father, presumably for that reason.

That's ludicrous. By 5 months most babies can roll over. It's insane to put the baby on the OUTSIDE edge of the bed, where a simple roll could make it plummet three feet or however far to the floor. Skull fractures, anyone?!

For this very reason, all experts agree that safe cosleeping should occur optimally on a flat mattress on the floor. The second best alternative is a mattress placed tightly up against a wall. 

MayDay

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #32 on: March 24, 2015, 09:59:58 AM »
I found several websites that advised putting baby on the far side of mother, not between mother and father, presumably for that reason.

That's ludicrous. By 5 months most babies can roll over. It's insane to put the baby on the OUTSIDE edge of the bed, where a simple roll could make it plummet three feet or however far to the floor. Skull fractures, anyone?!

I left out the part about mattress on the floor or bed rail because I assumed people reading this had a teensy weesy bit of common sense. 

Since that is not the case, here you go:

If you are cosleeping you should either have an infant-safe bed rail, a safe sidecar arrangement, or a mattress on the ground. 



Argyle

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #33 on: March 24, 2015, 10:26:26 AM »
A friend who is a nurse says that their standard advice for babies/toddlers who have reflux or various ailments where they need to be upright is to let them sleep in their car seat.  I mean, in your bedroom — not in the car!

Gin1984

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #34 on: March 25, 2015, 06:44:31 AM »
Why on earth does it matter if they're cosleeping with biological parents or not?  Same for nursing? 


Those claims seem incredibly judgmental and aren't mentioned at all in the overview you provided as evidence.

You are right that they aren't addressed in the article I linked, but you are wrong about it being judgmental.  It is considered common knowledge about safe cosleeping so I didn't explain it specifically. 

http://cosleeping.nd.edu/safe-co-sleeping-guidelines/. This guy, James McKenna, is a well known baby sleep researcher.  The page I posted says formula fed babies should be on a seperate sleep surface in the same room.  I am sure if you dig through his we page you can find the exact research, but the general idea is that nursing mothers are more attuned to the baby, sleep lighter, and wake more.  And that nursing babies wake more, and are at lower risk of SIDS. 

https://cosleeping.nd.edu/assets/31970/mckenna_why_babies_should_n.pdf. This is a nice overview with citations.  On page 135 is talks about sleeping with a "specific adult caregiver" as a factor in lowering SIDS deaths.  That quote is actually talking about room sharing but not bed sharing.  Further on the same page it gives citations for increased risk of death when sleeping with an adult other than the mother. 

So basically, if you aren't nursing, don't bed share (thus biological parents only in the vast majority of cases, although some adoptive parents induce lactation) and it says father generally but I assume committed caregiver could be substituted, does not initially have the attunement with the infant, but within 3 months develops it.  I found several websites that advised putting baby on the far side of mother, not between mother and father, presumably for that reason.
He is a anthropologist, not medical doctor, not a PhD in a hard science and makes statements without citations.  Statements that according to MDs and PhDs in hard sciences cannot be fully determined.

justajane

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #35 on: March 25, 2015, 07:03:56 AM »
There's a sleep clinic in our city that we have unfortunately had to go to twice with our kids. This is run by pediatricians and pediatric nurse practitioners. They recommend cosleeping and FWIW, they did not mention a difference between formula and breastfed babies. The main things that they stressed are - no blankets OR pillows, flat mattress on the floor pushed up against the wall (or far enough away from a wall that the baby couldn't get lodged between the wall and the mattress), and only with babies over 4 months. 

But if you poll the medical establishment as a whole, they would solidly be against cosleeping in any form. I think the sleep clinic just realized that it is a losing battle to keep babies out of the bed and decided to make the sleeping situation as safe as possible.

Guses

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #36 on: March 30, 2015, 10:52:55 AM »
Just to update the thread, we noticed that our son had 4(!!!!) teeth growing in the front of his mouth. This probably explains much of the waking.

We are also more convinced that reflux (especially with teething) is playing a part in it.

We have a prescription for an acid inhibitor to try to see if it will help^.


elaine amj

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #37 on: April 08, 2015, 06:07:55 PM »
Has it gotten better for you? FWIW, I think babies are just individual little creatures and what works for one will not work for the next necessarily.

My first, I did modified CIO at 4 months and she slept decently (made a massive difference in improving her naps). I became an advocate.

My second, I spent years trying every single sleep method. And I was anal about it...we both suffered many nights of endless crying or endless rounds of me going back in to "reassure him". He didn't sleep well until about 6/7 yrs and still only sleeps through the night occasionally (he's 12).

When he was about 11, he increased his complaints about having to sleep by himself. I never took him seriously all this years, telling him how lucky he was to have his own room and how that's what all kids want. Well, not mine. He begged and begged and finally I switched him with his sister. He now shares a room with my MIL and my daughter sleeps alone. He much much prefers it - he still hates sleeping alone. His biggest treat is on long weekends when his sister (a yr older) lets him sleep on her bedroom floor.

I think he's weird - but looking back, co-sleeping would likely have stopped all the sleep issues we had. I was just adamant against it since I get claustrophobic. I really should have given in years ago, shoved the bed against the wall and put him on DH's side (DH actually liked co-sleeping). We would all have slept much better.

Anyway, kids are weird - keep trying different things and hopefully you will figure out what your baby needs.

ShoulderThingThatGoesUp

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #38 on: April 09, 2015, 09:12:58 AM »
Gotta be cautious about it, but co-sleeping is the only thing that kept us functional. I slept in a separate bed for the first few months, and my nursing wife co-slept with our girl.

She still sleeps between us. Eventually it's going to be a challenge, but everything is going so well that it's not something either of us care to address right now.

Context: she is nearly 17 months old.

Guses

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #39 on: April 14, 2015, 05:34:34 AM »
Little update here. The reflux medicine really helped with the frequent waking.

We are combining this with a gradual weaning during the night (currently at 3 minutes BF).

Last night, baby slept from 7h30 to 6h30 and only woke once at 10PM for a burp!!!

Hopefully we get more of these.

cerebus

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #40 on: April 15, 2015, 01:02:09 AM »
We struggled with these issues recently so we changed the daytime routine which helped. Much fewer daytime naps, and then a bedtime routine that had her in bed by 8 with the wife, so she takes around half an hour to go sleep, then sleeps through much longer hours. They just go through so many phases and often you don't even know what's driving their behaviour till you try out a bunch of things and realize that they weren't just bratty they had an issue.

Scandium

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #41 on: April 20, 2015, 09:03:38 AM »

Just curious what country you are in.  We are in the US and are expecting in May.  My wife has to exhaust all of her vacation/sick days (15 days) then apply for short term disability that will cover 80% pay for 4 weeks then she will take an additional 4 weeks unpaid during her recovery/bonding.  I can only take vacation days, probably only 1 week, when our little girl arrives.

Not to derail; but look into your state law for family medical leave. Look for "care for sick immediate family". I dug into it and found that I could take 2 weeks of sick leave to stay home to "care for" my wife/child per MD law. My employer of course never suggested this and I had to point out the law. We had accumulating sick leave that rolled over so this was no problem. Soon after they ended this and now only give us a limited number per year. I wonder why..

A little late for you, but my wife signed up for Aflac a while before we conceived (at least a year I think) and got most of her unpaid leave covered.

Our son decided to go from waking up once per night to 3-4 now. My wife is tired but she still goes to work.  She's way tougher than I am.. You may just have to deal with being tired.

mm1970

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #42 on: April 23, 2015, 05:03:09 PM »

Just curious what country you are in.  We are in the US and are expecting in May.  My wife has to exhaust all of her vacation/sick days (15 days) then apply for short term disability that will cover 80% pay for 4 weeks then she will take an additional 4 weeks unpaid during her recovery/bonding.  I can only take vacation days, probably only 1 week, when our little girl arrives.

Not to derail; but look into your state law for family medical leave. Look for "care for sick immediate family". I dug into it and found that I could take 2 weeks of sick leave to stay home to "care for" my wife/child per MD law. My employer of course never suggested this and I had to point out the law. We had accumulating sick leave that rolled over so this was no problem. Soon after they ended this and now only give us a limited number per year. I wonder why..

A little late for you, but my wife signed up for Aflac a while before we conceived (at least a year I think) and got most of her unpaid leave covered.

Our son decided to go from waking up once per night to 3-4 now. My wife is tired but she still goes to work.  She's way tougher than I am.. You may just have to deal with being tired.
Yep, my son is almost 3 and I'm still tired.

Though 3/4 of that is just my own insomnia.

Guses

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #43 on: April 27, 2015, 08:05:05 AM »
Kaaaaa-Ching!

This weekend, baby slept from 8PM to 6h30 AM STEEEEEEERAIGHT!

:D

Meggslynn

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Re: Help needed! No more sleeping and feeling exhausted all the time
« Reply #44 on: April 27, 2015, 09:25:27 AM »
Kaaaaa-Ching!

This weekend, baby slept from 8PM to 6h30 AM STEEEEEEERAIGHT!

:D


This is awesome. Congrats!!

 

Wow, a phone plan for fifteen bucks!