Author Topic: Chores and reward  (Read 436 times)

YearninAndLearning

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Chores and reward
« on: February 21, 2019, 11:21:38 AM »
What is your chore system for your children and are they mandatory or to they earn rewards?
My 9 year old son has to earn video game time so every day he must unload the dishwasher, do his homework, and read for 20 minutes. I began considering that he needs to be doing more chores, but do I offer an incentive or reward? When I was a child my mom made a chore list and they were mandatory. We did not receive an allowance. What is working for you at home?

tthree

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Re: Chores and reward
« Reply #1 on: February 21, 2019, 11:40:40 AM »
My nine year gets $9/week, transferred automatically every Wednesday from my account to his.  He is expected to buy every he needs with this money.  For example last week he bought himself pants from Value Village.

Throughout the week he is expected to do everything I tell him to do:)  For example: take out the garbage, compost, sort the recycling, load the dishwasher, etc.  On the weekend he helps with house cleaning: vacuuming floors/furniture, wiping mirrors/counters and scrubbing toilets are the tasks he has (mostly) mastered.

The five year old kind of "helps", but does not receive any money.

AMandM

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Re: Chores and reward
« Reply #2 on: February 22, 2019, 09:11:54 AM »
Chores in our house are mandatory for both kids and adults.  Nobody gets paid for their contributions to the household work, everybody benefits from it.

NonprofitER

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Re: Chores and reward
« Reply #3 on: February 22, 2019, 12:10:22 PM »
Chores in our house are mandatory for both kids and adults.  Nobody gets paid for their contributions to the household work, everybody benefits from it.

+1
In our house, the 9yo has chores just because its an important part of living harmoniously with other human beings. She gets a new privilege and a new responsibility every birthday.  Privileges have been things like getting her ears pierced or beginning to have sleepovers. Her responsibilities current include: loading her own dishes after meals, managing her own laundry, cleaning the bathroom she uses 1x week, making her bed, tidying her own room, etc. 

I read a lot on the subject of paid vs. unpaid chores vs. allowance.  I highly recommend the book "The Opposite of Spoiled".  We ultimately landed on starting an allowance at age 5, but given without strings to chores. We see the purpose of an allowance as learning how to handle money, so we're focused on that aspect of it. Her allowance is divided into "save", "give" and "budget". She decides where to donate the "give" portion to once a year - IE, one year it went to the local animal shelter, and we arranged for the director to give her a tour before she handed over her donation.

Rules for her allowance include:
1. We don't buy her things outside of Christmas/Birthday/Easter, etc. If she wants something between, she pays for it. 
2. We do provide all basics (clothing, etc. often given at Christmas/birthday), but if she looses something or doesn't take care of it, her money replaces it.
3. We retain veto power over all purchases.
4. "Save" money can only be spent on something she has truly been saving for, with advance planning. It can't be spent impulsively.
5. No going into "debt". She can't see something at the store and decide she desperately needs it and wants to pay us back if we shell out the money.
6. She cannot spend more than 50% of her "save" or "budget" (read: fun) money in one go. Meaning, if she has $100 in her fun money or savings, she can only spend $50. This is to keep her from spending down all at once.

She's had these rules in place for almost 5 years now and they seem to work really well. She expects new chores each year. She expects to have to replace a lost jacket. And she knows that even her fun money shouldn't be spent all in one go. It's been a good system so far.
We haven't yet decided how much of big, teen items she should have to contribute to (things like her first car). I'm curious what other parents do about that and when we should start those conversations.