Author Topic: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting  (Read 1209 times)

ysette9

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Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« on: October 27, 2017, 02:22:17 PM »
I'm home on maternity leave with my second who was a preemie at 32,5 weeks. Her sister also came early at 34 weeks but we never had the same problem with her. Specifically: grunting and straining and making noise all the time. All. The. Time.

Apparently this is just a feature (bug, I say) of preemies that they eventually grow out of. In the meantime we can't get sleep. Right now one parent sleeps in the other room and the unlucky parents gets to listen to her grunt all night long. Grunting is moderately better if she sleeps on my chest, which naturally breaks all advice on safe sleeping. We have tried her in her bed, in ours, in a semi-upright bouncy chair, on our chests. I wear earplugs and have blasted a white noise app. She has been on an antacid and I am using gas drops. I have (mostly) eliminated dairy. And yet sleep continues to be a challenge.

Any tips? The hospital doesn't do returns or exchanges, and in any case we have decided she is kind of cute and we want to keep her after all. ;)
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Sibley

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #1 on: October 27, 2017, 06:04:52 PM »
So, she's sleeping in the same room with you? Any reason why she can't be in a separate room? You wouldn't be as bothered then.

Thanks for the laugh too - I needed it. :)

brycedoula

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #2 on: October 27, 2017, 08:57:31 PM »
How old (gestational age) is she now? While my daughter wasnít a preemie (she was a 9-lb termie born at 39+2) she also went thru a similarly-exhausting ďgruntingĒ phase a few weeks after birth. From 2am-6am she grunted. And grunted. And grunted. One of us would end up in the living room, in the recliner, Netflixing until she stopped.

No tips - but I can say that she will eventually stop.

ysette9

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #3 on: October 27, 2017, 10:41:58 PM »
She is about two weeks past her due date now so she is fully baked. It seems like bad parenting to put her in a room by herself when they advise you to sleep in the same room for the first six months.

Iíll keep my fingers crossed that she grows out of this in a few more weeks also. ;-)
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Northern gal

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #4 on: October 27, 2017, 11:37:24 PM »
It sounds like you have tried everything there is.

Unfortunately taking turns may be the only way... maybe set up a mattress in the other room so the parent who has "night off" can actually sleep well.

DS was 39weeks but went through a phase of making noises. I was ready to get him medicated for colic when I realised he was silent when lying in bed with me. Thus the bassinet was abandoned and we coslept and bedshared for the next 14 months. I didn't set out to do this but it worked better for us.

DH slept in the nursery for a year... that part was sucky but I'd rather a rested hubby...


formerlydivorcedmom

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #5 on: October 28, 2017, 09:02:49 PM »
My oldest did this for a while.  It freaked the dog out so much he'd go wake up my mom (who was staying with us to help during the day) to make the baby stop.

We finally just put her in her own room at 2 weeks old.  With the baby monitor, I could hear anything "out of the ordinary" and wake up.

My sweetie was also on an apnea monitor, so I knew if there were actual breathing problems I'd be notified by the piercing alarm.

Eventually, they do stop.
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TrMama

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #6 on: October 28, 2017, 09:19:33 PM »
Earplugs. My 2nd was a 10lb termie but she was also a loud sleeper. I think I only lasted 2 weeks sleeping in the same room with her. I remember wearing earplugs. You can buy them by the bucketful at the hardware store ;-)

ysette9

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #7 on: October 28, 2017, 09:40:31 PM »
10lb preemie- yowza!

We already wear earplugs and I can attest to the greatness of buying them by the bucketful. I hear her through earplugs and a blasting white noise app. I am just so attuned to my babies that Iíll hear them through earplugs and closed solid-core doors in the next room. Sigh.
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ysette9

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #8 on: October 28, 2017, 09:41:32 PM »
Also, the story of freaking out the dog is hilarious, though I am sure for you it was anything but.
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HappierAtHome

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #9 on: October 29, 2017, 12:57:51 AM »
Not a preemie, but my baby was so loud in his sleep for the first few months of his life that we even took him to the doctor to make sure nothing was wrong... No joke.

But he grew out of it eventually.

Northern gal

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #10 on: October 29, 2017, 05:45:17 AM »
10lb preemie- yowza!

We already wear earplugs and I can attest to the greatness of buying them by the bucketful. I hear her through earplugs and a blasting white noise app. I am just so attuned to my babies that Iíll hear them through earplugs and closed solid-core doors in the next room. Sigh.

Oh yes, mummy hormones. It is all a little unfair, but I guess it secures survival of the species.

Big hugs. It sounds like you are doing all you can.

It's a tough gig, and I can only imagine prem would be even harder.
« Last Edit: October 29, 2017, 05:46:51 AM by Northern gal »

iowajes

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #11 on: October 29, 2017, 05:54:08 AM »
Not a premie, but my daughter was a VERY loud sleeper, tons of grunts and wiggles for the first 3-4 months. At 7 months she still room shares (our pediatrician recommends the longer of the AAP 6mobths -
1 year recommendation) and is near silent. She just grew out of it.

TrMama

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #12 on: October 29, 2017, 09:35:44 AM »
10lb preemie- yowza!

We already wear earplugs and I can attest to the greatness of buying them by the bucketful. I hear her through earplugs and a blasting white noise app. I am just so attuned to my babies that Iíll hear them through earplugs and closed solid-core doors in the next room. Sigh.

Oops, I thought termie meant full term baby (AKA not a preemie). The 10lb monster was actually 2 days overdue. Regardless, she was loud. And hungry.

Out if curiosity, what's the medical rationale for having them sleep in the same room? My youngest is 9, so I'm kind of out of date on infant stuff.

rubybeth

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #13 on: October 29, 2017, 09:38:56 AM »
I'm not a parent, but I know parents who didn't sleep in the same room but they got heart rate/breathing monitors for their infants so they'd be alerted of any issues. I'm pretty sure it was this brand:

https://www.toysrus.com/buy/video-monitors/angelcare-video-and-sound-with-wireless-movement-sensor-pad-baby-monitor-ac517-ac517-107535436
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former player

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #14 on: October 29, 2017, 09:53:48 AM »
It seems like bad parenting to put her in a room by herself when they advise you to sleep in the same room for the first six months.
This sentence yelled out at me.  Parenting advice seems to have reversed something significant every 5 years for the last 50 years.  If it's not a matter of life and death (and sleeping in the same room is not) [Edit: current advice says babies under 6 months should always sleep in the same room as a parent], take any parenting advice with a very large pinch of salt: there are millions of babies in this world who have grown up to be successful adults and whose parents did the exact opposite of whatever advice you have currently following.

The biggest predictor for babies growing up to be healthy, happy children and then healthy, happy adults is for their parents to be healthy, happy and engaged in their upbringing.  You cannot do any of those things without getting enough sleep yourself.  Whatever you need to do to get enough sleep yourself, do it.  Your child will be so much better off with rested parents attending to her in the hours you and baby are all awake.
« Last Edit: October 29, 2017, 02:47:28 PM by former player »
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ysette9

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #15 on: October 29, 2017, 01:09:16 PM »
I must have read to quickly and saw ďpreemieĒ instead of ďtermieĒ. Maybe because I have never had a full term baby, I had never seen that word before. 10lb is big any way you look at it.

The last two nights we have been doing shifts and I take second shift (3:00-8:00). I ended up with her on my chest while i laid down flat. It worked surprisingly well. She seemed to grunt slightly less while on me. Not an ideal sleeping arrangement but Iíll take it for now. We will see what next week brings.
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iowajes

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #16 on: October 29, 2017, 01:17:38 PM »
It seems like bad parenting to put her in a room by herself when they advise you to sleep in the same room for the first six months.
If it's not a matter of life and death (and sleeping in the same room is not),

Actually, that's pretty much exactly why it is recommended.
It isn't for better sleep (apparently both baby and parents are less likely to sleep well). It is solely a "fewer babies die" recommendation.

former player

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #17 on: October 29, 2017, 02:47:56 PM »
It seems like bad parenting to put her in a room by herself when they advise you to sleep in the same room for the first six months.
If it's not a matter of life and death (and sleeping in the same room is not),

Actually, that's pretty much exactly why it is recommended.
It isn't for better sleep (apparently both baby and parents are less likely to sleep well). It is solely a "fewer babies die" recommendation.
Thanks for pointing this out.  I've edited the original post to correct
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samusugiru

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #18 on: November 08, 2017, 08:28:16 PM »
We couldn't do anything about the grunting unfortunately but my husband seemed to sleep through it easier. He would take them to sleep in their bassinets in the living room to give me a break or I would sleep on the sofa while he stayed with them in our room.

ysette9

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #19 on: November 08, 2017, 08:35:03 PM »
That is exactly our situation now as well. He sleeps with her in the bedroom and I take the couch. I can often (though not always) hear her through the closed door and my earplugs before he even wakes up. Sometimes he wakes to her house first and brings her out to me. It feels like her grunting is easing a bit, though I donít want to jinx myself typing that. It has to end eventually, right?

[corrected to get rid of auto correct nonsense]
« Last Edit: November 09, 2017, 05:56:26 PM by ysette9 »
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samusugiru

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Re: Anyone with preemies? Tips for dealing with grunting
« Reply #20 on: November 09, 2017, 05:53:35 PM »
That is exactly our situation now as well. He sleeps with her in the bedroom and I take the couch. I can often (though not always) hear her through the closed door and my earplugs before he even wakes up. Sometimes he wakes to her house first and brings her out to me. It feels like her grunting is Jesse Jing a bit, though I donít want to jinx myself typing that. It has to end eventually, right?

I can't remember when it stopped, maybe around six months? I think it's harder on women because the hormonal changes make us very sensitive to their noises.  I guess that's why it reduces sids,  we're on high alert. Annoyingly they seemed to sleep very quietly when out for walks in the pram. Tim Minchin does a very funny piece on babies sleeping, hilariously accurate. Hang in there, I slept best when someone took them for walks outside.