Top is in

[Mr. Boh]

Why was nobody offended by all the bacon talk? A lot of people have an aversion to pork.

[dragoncar]

But just to be super clear, I’m only sexually attracted to cars

Any specific colored car? Or

Any color.  Big tailpipe

[doneby35]

Why was nobody offended by all the bacon talk? A lot of people have an aversion to pork.

I was pretty offended, but then I had a snickers bar and all was good again.

[MrDelane]

My fear is that your only objection is that you found the commentary sexist, despite no mention of gender or orientation.

'Brunette' implies female.
'Brunet' would imply male.


Given we're now talking about hair, it's clear that we've finally gotten to the top.
Right?

[dragoncar]

My fear is that your only objection is that you found the commentary sexist, despite no mention of gender or orientation.

'Brunette' implies female.
'Brunet' would imply male.


Given we're now talking about hair, it's clear that we've finally gotten to the top.
Right?

Not everyone knows the gender neutral word for brunetz

[Radagast]

The mother of all tops is in.

The top of this thread is definitely in. Nothing but downtrends and false gains since thorstach post on 2018-02-02. I feel like I've sold out too.

[marty998]

But just to be super clear, I’m only sexually attracted to cars

Any specific colored car? Or

Any color.  Big tailpipe

I can't wait for the first twitter post from a self aware car complaining about being harassed by a dragon.

The world will have truly gone mad by then, though these days you can never tell. It's all bonkers anyway.

[krustyburger]

Bottom is in!

Came here to post this.

If I learned anything this week, it is that I am far less risk averse than I thought. Will be trimming back bondes a bit at some point.

I’m also trimming my blonde position back.  Diversifying into brunettess

Are you hoping for extended top or bottom positions from your brunette?

I'm reducing my exposure to man-buns in favour of stubble (holding steady in my allocation to pecs and abs tho)

[nereo]

But just to be super clear, I’m only sexually attracted to cars

Any specific colored car? Or

Any color.  Big tailpipe

I can't wait for the first twitter post from a self aware car complaining about being harassed by a dragon.

The world will have truly gone mad by then, though these days you can never tell. It's all bonkers anyway.

How does one get consent from a car, anyway?  Do we not already treat them like our slaves, demanding they carry us whenever and wherever we please?
Do these latest ‘smart cars’ have the right to decline a particular trip entirely?  We are already giving them the freedom to choose not to steer into a lamppost if they don’t want to and not to merge into another car if they don’t feel like it...

[dandarc]

10% gain coming today.  Cashed out my entire 401K yesterday and re-buying better funds today.  Noticed E-Trade now offering Schwab index funds on the no-fee list, so I got off my ass and finally fixed that account to line up with the IPS.  A little under half of our entire portfolio in cash for 1 day.  With my luck, market going up today is pretty much guaranteed.

So top is in - at close today.

[nereo]

10% gain coming today.  Cashed out my entire 401K yesterday and re-buying better funds today.  Noticed E-Trade now offering Schwab index funds on the no-fee list, so I got off my ass and finally fixed that account to line up with the IPS.  A little under half of our entire portfolio in cash for 1 day.  With my luck, market going up today is pretty much guaranteed.

So top is in - at close today.

Quoting for posterity
:-P

[2Birds1Stone]

10% gain coming today.  Cashed out my entire 401K yesterday and re-buying better funds today.  Noticed E-Trade now offering Schwab index funds on the no-fee list, so I got off my ass and finally fixed that account to line up with the IPS.  A little under half of our entire portfolio in cash for 1 day.  With my luck, market going up today is pretty much guaranteed.

So top is in - at close today.

LOL, a 10% gain might shatter some records.

Part of me hopes you are right, the other hopes for a continued slide as I still have $15k of tax deferred space to invest in 2018

[GuitarStv]

I’m also trimming my blonde position back.  Diversifying into brunettess

Are you hoping for extended top or bottom positions from your brunette?

Not calling you guys out in particular, but I wish you wouldn't do this. I think it takes a fun thread and makes it... not as fun. For a significant portion of the population.

Agree.

My comment was intended as a joke . . . specifically a double entendre regarding the stock market terms 'positions', 'extended', and 'top'/'bottom'.  I was kinda pleased with myself that the sex joke was gender neutral and therefore would be relatively inoffensive, not realizing that there is a separate term for a dark haired dude.  It wasn't meant to offend but obviously did, so please accept my apologies.

[aboatguy]

My fear is that your only objection is that you found the commentary sexist, despite no mention of gender or orientation.

'Brunette' implies female.
'Brunet' would imply male.


Given we're now talking about hair, it's clear that we've finally gotten to the top.
Right?

Hmm I have had blond on my gov issued ids is blond the only gender non binary hair description?


I have to modify this ... Ginger describes all sexes too!

However, in my honest opinion if someone is getting worked up about light hearted hair color comments they are wrapped way too tight and need to drink heavily until they learn to relax! (I recommend sherry casked single malt)
Now lets get back to the race for the bottom!

[Financial.Velociraptor]

My back of the envelope calculation shows a 22.52% drop from peak to trough.  An official bear market!  Gogogogogo Thorstach, master of prognostication!!

[AdrianC]

My back of the envelope calculation shows a 22.52% drop from peak to trough.  An official bear market!  Gogogogogo Thorstach, master of prognostication!!

For what?

[PathtoFIRE]

For what?

Not SP500, I get 7.8% peak to trough. Maybe Bitcoin?

[dandarc]

For what?

Not SP500, I get 7.8% peak to trough. Maybe Bitcoin?

Bitcoin is closer to 60%.

[dandarc]

So about 30% BTC, 70% S&P 500.

[UnleashHell]

Its all my fault. Sorry.

I moved a large sum of money from an old job to the 401k at the new job. It took a large chunk of time due to the archaic systems they use – as in they sent me a check that I had to send to my new provider.

My timing brilliance meant that I missed a 2 week run in the market where the s&p went up 3.3% but I did get my money in just in time to see it drop about 6.5% since.

At least I’m now in admiral funds and will save about .2% a year going forward so it won’t take long to make up the difference…..

1/4million and they send a friggin check??? FFS….

The top was in when I reinvested my money…. Shit – 2 weeks later and it would have almost been worth cashing out some of that!!!

[TheAnonOne]

I always front-load my 401k and am paid monthly.

So right after the 4-5% drop I put in $10,500! I was going to set it up to 16k but I literally forgot!

Will max the 401k with FEB check.

[sherr]

I’m also trimming my blonde position back.  Diversifying into brunettess

Are you hoping for extended top or bottom positions from your brunette?

Not calling you guys out in particular, but I wish you wouldn't do this. I think it takes a fun thread and makes it... not as fun. For a significant portion of the population.

Agree.

Can we please make your objections a little more specific?  What is it about GSV's post that is problematic?

No I will not be nailed down into explicitly defining terms for you. We both know that's a fools errand.

But there's no reason that a thread making fun of market timing has to devolve into posting semi-risque pictures or joking about whether big boobs or big butts are better. I feel like that's not very welcoming behavior.

And no I'm not "offended", I just wish that people wouldn't do it and am making that wish known.

[frugalnacho]

I also object to a lot of non specific stuff in this thread in general. 

[BrightFIRE]

I’m also trimming my blonde position back.  Diversifying into brunettess

Are you hoping for extended top or bottom positions from your brunette?

Not calling you guys out in particular, but I wish you wouldn't do this. I think it takes a fun thread and makes it... not as fun. For a significant portion of the population.

Agree.

Can we please make your objections a little more specific?  What is it about GSV's post that is problematic?

Calling it "not as fun" is not as helpful as it could be.  This thread has ranged widely over a variety of silly topics, and I'm not sure this one is any different.

My fear is that your only objection is that you found the commentary sexist, despite no mention of gender or orientation.  If that's the case, then I think the problem might reside in the offended party.  Did you maybe make some unwarranted assumptions about the intent behind the comment?  Would your level of discomfort with it change if you learned that GSV was a gay Asian man ?  Do you just object to the insinuation that some people find other people attractive, even without any gender specific context, or do you object to what I think you have perceived as a disparaging comment about women specifically?

I recently watched a black comedian tell a story about walking with a group of his white friends, in Africa, when a stranger shouted "hey monkey!" at them, and one of his friends immediately turned to him and apologized.  Who's the racist now?  Why did you assume that "monkey" was aimed at the one black guy in the group?  Did you make an assumption about perceived discriminatory intent that reveals more about your own character than the person you're calling out?

Jumping in to defend others at such length when someone mildly suggests boys' locker room humor makes it less fun for the women here is puzzling. You only have to go back to page 40 to see why some women might find this thread occasionally unpleasant. It's not imaginary, and it's really obnoxious and condescending to reply like this. When several other guys pile on with "yeah, it's no big deal, lighten up, ladies!" it only adds to the impression that women aren't welcome here.

As a matter of politeness and respect for the other person, the correct response when someone says they don't like your joke (for literally any topic!), is, "sorry, my bad, I didn't think about it from that perspective", NOT a lecture on how "you people are too sensitive". GuitarStv did a great job of doing just that.

In other news, my 403b contribution goes in today, so I was happy to see we're headed back down.

[dreadmoose]

I also object to a lot of non specific stuff in this thread in general.

I only object to this statement specifically, actually the 30th character even more specifically. All other generalities and statements are kosher. Though now I object to my use of kosher.

[frugalnacho]

There is nothing kosher about this bacon filled thread.

[Mr. Boh]

[dougules]

My fear is that your only objection is that you found the commentary sexist, despite no mention of gender or orientation.

'Brunette' implies female.
'Brunet' would imply male.


Given we're now talking about hair, it's clear that we've finally gotten to the top.
Right?

Hmm I have had blond on my gov issued ids is blond the only gender non binary hair description?


I have to modify this ... Ginger describes all sexes too!

However, in my honest opinion if someone is getting worked up about light hearted hair color comments they are wrapped way too tight and need to drink heavily until they learn to relax! (I recommend sherry casked single malt)
Now lets get back to the race for the bottom!

Ha.  If you only knew what that means to a certain segment of the population. 

[Travis]

But just to be super clear, I’m only sexually attracted to cars

Any specific colored car? Or

Any color.  Big tailpipe

I can't wait for the first twitter post from a self aware car complaining about being harassed by a dragon.

The world will have truly gone mad by then, though these days you can never tell. It's all bonkers anyway.

How does one get consent from a car, anyway?  Do we not already treat them like our slaves, demanding they carry us whenever and wherever we please?
Do these latest ‘smart cars’ have the right to decline a particular trip entirely?  We are already giving them the freedom to choose not to steer into a lamppost if they don’t want to and not to merge into another car if they don’t feel like it...

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

[Exflyboy]

So the S&P is about 5% down from the peak and the Media seems to think the end of the world has come..

Amazing really.

[retireatbirth]

I hope it's still down when I get my March bonus. Dumping it all into total market. No brakes!

[salt cured]

10% gain coming today.  Cashed out my entire 401K yesterday and re-buying better funds today.  Noticed E-Trade now offering Schwab index funds on the no-fee list, so I got off my ass and finally fixed that account to line up with the IPS.  A little under half of our entire portfolio in cash for 1 day.  With my luck, market going up today is pretty much guaranteed.

So top is in - at close today.

I sold $25k of American Funds yesterday and put in a buy order this morning to move it all into FUSVX, so you might be right about that 10% gain!

[TempusFugit]

So the S&P is about 5% down from the peak and the Media seems to think the end of the world has come..

Amazing really.

We're back to the levels not seen since the dark days of December 2017 (Dec 6 level of S&P was 2,629).  Remember how depressed and downright scared we all were at our portfolio levels back in those days?  I shudder even now at the recollection. 

[dandarc]

10% gain coming today.  Cashed out my entire 401K yesterday and re-buying better funds today.  Noticed E-Trade now offering Schwab index funds on the no-fee list, so I got off my ass and finally fixed that account to line up with the IPS.  A little under half of our entire portfolio in cash for 1 day.  With my luck, market going up today is pretty much guaranteed.

So top is in - at close today.

I sold $25k of American Funds yesterday and put in a buy order this morning to move it all into FUSVX, so you might be right about that 10% gain!

Everybody knows 10% up days always start 2% down.  Clearly the big gain is happening just as predicted.

[nereo]

But just to be super clear, I’m only sexually attracted to cars

Any specific colored car? Or

Any color.  Big tailpipe

I can't wait for the first twitter post from a self aware car complaining about being harassed by a dragon.

The world will have truly gone mad by then, though these days you can never tell. It's all bonkers anyway.

How does one get consent from a car, anyway?  Do we not already treat them like our slaves, demanding they carry us whenever and wherever we please?
Do these latest ‘smart cars’ have the right to decline a particular trip entirely?  We are already giving them the freedom to choose not to steer into a lamppost if they don’t want to and not to merge into another car if they don’t feel like it...

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

Well thank goodness I won't be around then for it to matter.  Let my offspring's offspring deal with it.

[TheAnonOne]

But just to be super clear, I’m only sexually attracted to cars

Any specific colored car? Or

Any color.  Big tailpipe

I can't wait for the first twitter post from a self aware car complaining about being harassed by a dragon.

The world will have truly gone mad by then, though these days you can never tell. It's all bonkers anyway.

How does one get consent from a car, anyway?  Do we not already treat them like our slaves, demanding they carry us whenever and wherever we please?
Do these latest ‘smart cars’ have the right to decline a particular trip entirely?  We are already giving them the freedom to choose not to steer into a lamppost if they don’t want to and not to merge into another car if they don’t feel like it...

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

Well thank goodness I won't be around then for it to matter.  Let my offspring's offspring deal with it.

Speak for yourself, I have at least 100 good years left in me! We are all in it for the long haul here right?

[Travis]

But just to be super clear, I’m only sexually attracted to cars

Any specific colored car? Or

Any color.  Big tailpipe

I can't wait for the first twitter post from a self aware car complaining about being harassed by a dragon.

The world will have truly gone mad by then, though these days you can never tell. It's all bonkers anyway.

How does one get consent from a car, anyway?  Do we not already treat them like our slaves, demanding they carry us whenever and wherever we please?
Do these latest ‘smart cars’ have the right to decline a particular trip entirely?  We are already giving them the freedom to choose not to steer into a lamppost if they don’t want to and not to merge into another car if they don’t feel like it...

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

Well thank goodness I won't be around then for it to matter.  Let my offspring's offspring deal with it.

Speak for yourself, I have at least 100 good years left in me! We are all in it for the long haul here right?

I'm going to live forever.

So far, so good.

And good luck proving me wrong. One of us won't be around to say "I told you so!"

[aboatguy]

[TheAnonOne]

But just to be super clear, I’m only sexually attracted to cars

Any specific colored car? Or

Any color.  Big tailpipe

I can't wait for the first twitter post from a self aware car complaining about being harassed by a dragon.

The world will have truly gone mad by then, though these days you can never tell. It's all bonkers anyway.

How does one get consent from a car, anyway?  Do we not already treat them like our slaves, demanding they carry us whenever and wherever we please?
Do these latest ‘smart cars’ have the right to decline a particular trip entirely?  We are already giving them the freedom to choose not to steer into a lamppost if they don’t want to and not to merge into another car if they don’t feel like it...

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

Well thank goodness I won't be around then for it to matter.  Let my offspring's offspring deal with it.

Speak for yourself, I have at least 100 good years left in me! We are all in it for the long haul here right?

I'm going to live forever.

So far, so good.

And good luck proving me wrong. One of us won't be around to say "I told you so!"

What makes you so sure? Can I have your models based on past life performance?

[Bicycle_B]

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

That's the top I am waiting for. 

[Clean Shaven]

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

That's the top I am waiting for.

I hate to be the one to break it to you, but Musk's car was a roadster, which has no top.

[JAYSLOL]

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

That's the top I am waiting for.

I hate to be the one to break it to you, but Musk's car was a roadster, which has no top.

Also, in zero gravity if it had a roof, would it be the top?  Hmmm. 

[Mississippi Mudstache]

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

That's the top I am waiting for.

I hate to be the one to break it to you, but Musk's car was a roadster, which has no top.

Also, in zero gravity if it had a roof, would it be the top?  Hmmm.

Common misconception - objects in orbit are not in zero gravity, but perpetual free-fall, much like the stock market from this point forward!

[ILikeDividends]

Common misconception - objects in orbit are not in zero gravity, but perpetual free-fall, much like the stock market from this point forward!

There is no such thing as gravity.  The earth sucks.

Vacuum is in.

[dragoncar]

Musk's car is going to return in 100 years at the head of an alien army and slaughter us all. The first words out of its mouth will be "NOW the top is in!"

That's the top I am waiting for.

I hate to be the one to break it to you, but Musk's car was a roadster, which has no top.

Also, in zero gravity if it had a roof, would it be the top?  Hmmm.

Common misconception - objects in orbit are not in zero gravity, but perpetual free-fall, much like the stock market from this point forward!

The roadster has another 67% to go before aphelion  TOP NOT IN

[dragoncar]

The polite response when you don’t like a joke is to laugh and pretend it was funny.  You guys are so rude

[MrDelane]

The polite response when you don’t like a joke is to laugh and pretend it was funny.  You guys are so rude

Hahaha.

[dragoncar]

The polite response when you don’t like a joke is to laugh and pretend it was funny.  You guys are so rude

Hahaha.

Shit sorry you didn’t like that one

[Cabaka]

hmmm. would have thought this thread would be more financially entertaining.

oh well, still early yet. if the rates continue to increase and world feds stay on their schedule, it's still got possibilities.

[ILikeDividends]

hmmm. would have thought this thread would be more financially entertaining.

Trader 1: Hey, I just bought a million dollar dog.
Trader 2: How do you know it's worth a million dollars?
Trader 1: Because I traded two half million dollar cats for it.

Hedge fund manager: Hey little boy, why are you playing with that dog sh*t?
Little boy: I'm making a day-trader.
Hedge fund manager: Why are you making a day-trader?
Little boy: Because I don't have enough sh*t to make a hedge fund manager.