Author Topic: Money is time, but what do you do with it?  (Read 11192 times)

hotsaucebeard

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Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« on: September 22, 2014, 03:30:18 PM »
Anyone else face a mid-mustachian life crisis as you get closer to FIRE?

What are you going to do once you no longer have to work? What if none of the things mentioned in the articles seem interesting to you?

When I have significant free time now I find myself relaxing, making poor health choices, and being lazy. I guess that could be a side effect of working though - if you have to wake up early for work it's easy to know you shouldn't have another beer, but given an extra day off it's all too easy to have a few more.

I hope that once that magical FIRE date arrives I'll suddenly find wild hobbies to be passionate about, but I'm almost sure that's not how it works.

big_owl

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #1 on: September 22, 2014, 03:42:16 PM »
I'm totally confused by these sorts of threads - are there really people out there who might be bored if it weren't for work?  Frankly I have more hobbies than I know what to do with.  Whether it's bodybuilding, gardening, hiking, mountaineering, rearing giant silkmoths, snowshoeing, herp hunting, bird watching, owl prowls, volunteering at the local nature center, video gaming, etc (that's all I can think of in 30 seconds), I'm not going to be bored in retirement!  Who gives a shit if your interests don't align with MMM or whatever you read in these forums.  Sounds like you need to find some real hobbies outside of drinking beer.  Basically if you can't imagine what you could possibly do in retirement to fulfill yourself then:

1. Your job is pretty awesome and you probably shouldn't ever quit it.  Or...

2. ...your life is pretty pathetic and you should probably make an effort to find some hobbies to occupy your free time.

HopefulMustache

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #2 on: September 22, 2014, 04:06:41 PM »
I'm not especially close to FIRE or mid-life, but I don't think you're alone in thinking about that. I have plenty of things that I like to do in my free time, which include reading, writing, playing sports, gaming... but somehow, when I do manage to have some free time, I spend a healthy percentage of it NOT doing those things. While I dream of having the opportunity to engage in existing/new hobbies for an entire day, I think very few people are naturally able to just turn on 100% efficiency in anything (work or otherwise).

One of the things I like about MMM is the positivity he espouses - start getting into the habit of exploring and fulfilling your interests, and suddenly you realize (which you already knew) that it's more interesting than sitting around doing nothing. And then it gets easier. But you have to start. (I don't know if he ever actually said this, but it feels in line with his philosophy to me)

As I said, I'm no expert in this - I wonder where the time went and sit around doing nothing with the best of 'em. But I'm (steadily, I hope) working on focusing my energies where they will be most fulfilling.

Jon_Snow

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #3 on: September 22, 2014, 04:40:14 PM »
Big_owl, that post kicked all sorts of ass...I'm with you in that I've got a litany of passions and hobbies that my job prevented me from enjoying to their fullest. I'm just a week into my early retirement, with HUGE blocks of free time available (this is no pseudo-ER with kid rearing duties), and I am still doubtful I can get everything done by time time the Reaper comes calling.

If anyone thinks once they are free of work, they are gonna sit on the couch eating Cheetos, then for the love of all that is good and decent, KEEP WORKING.

RyanAtTanagra

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #4 on: September 22, 2014, 04:41:27 PM »
I agree with big_owl's thoughts, albeit hopefully with more tact ;-) I'm also confused by the idea that people don't know what to do with themselves if they don't have someone else telling them what to do all day.  Is it a personality type thing?  Age related?  I can see if you've been in a busy career for 40 years with hardly any free time for your own pursuits, you could lose the ability to self-entertain.  I didn't have many friends in my early 20s that would have gotten bored if they didn't have to work.  I may be able to find some peers now (mid-30s) with that problem if I asked around, but I imagine it's more prevalent as you go up.

I do understand your concern of being lazy in FI, as I find myself watching too many movies on my time off as well, but I think that's just a product of not getting to do it very often.  Last time I was unemployed (for 5 months), I spent way more time early on being lazy than I did towards the end, so I suspect I'll do the same thing for a few months when FI.  It's the unwinding period.

Tyler

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #5 on: September 22, 2014, 05:04:33 PM »
I get where the OP is coming from.  Some people pour so much of their life energy into work that they have a tough time flipping the switch off at night.  As a result, the time you do have off is mostly spent decompressing and you never really get into hobbies.  Sometimes you have to divorce yourself from the work addiction and allow yourself to recover before you're in the right mental state to explore new things in earnest.  Also, you may need to recalibrate your laziness meter -- what you see as "lazy" today may actually be a "healthy & normal" pace you've simply been conditioned by your employer to avoid.

Emilyngh

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #6 on: September 22, 2014, 05:13:17 PM »
Anyone else face a mid-mustachian life crisis as you get closer to FIRE?

What are you going to do once you no longer have to work? What if none of the things mentioned in the articles seem interesting to you?

When I have significant free time now I find myself relaxing, making poor health choices, and being lazy. I guess that could be a side effect of working though - if you have to wake up early for work it's easy to know you shouldn't have another beer, but given an extra day off it's all too easy to have a few more.

I hope that once that magical FIRE date arrives I'll suddenly find wild hobbies to be passionate about, but I'm almost sure that's not how it works.

I get where you're coming from.   But, (a) I don't think what you do in an extra day off is necessarily telling of what you'd do when ER.   There's a certain amount of wind down time that everyone needs before being productive again, and sometimes we have so little off work that we never get over that hump.

(b) I think the word "hobby" is too limited.   I don't feel like I have hobbies.   I always hate that job interview question and mumbled about gardening and cooking.   But, I really don't approach either of these like a hobby.   I like to live my life a certain way and it involves growing some food and cooking my food.   But, it involves lots of different things (spending time with friends and family, doing house renovation projects, getting things organized, sometimes art, sometimes reading etc) and I find the word "hobby" trite for describing how I want to live my life (which also changes with time).  So, perhaps the word is tripping you up?   You don't need hobbies.   You just need to be able to figure out how to live your life in a way that is fulfilling.

Beric01

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #7 on: September 22, 2014, 05:42:52 PM »
I'm totally confused by these sorts of threads - are there really people out there who might be bored if it weren't for work?  Frankly I have more hobbies than I know what to do with.  Whether it's bodybuilding, gardening, hiking, mountaineering, rearing giant silkmoths, snowshoeing, herp hunting, bird watching, owl prowls, volunteering at the local nature center, video gaming, etc (that's all I can think of in 30 seconds), I'm not going to be bored in retirement!  Who gives a shit if your interests don't align with MMM or whatever you read in these forums.  Sounds like you need to find some real hobbies outside of drinking beer.  Basically if you can't imagine what you could possibly do in retirement to fulfill yourself then:

1. Your job is pretty awesome and you probably shouldn't ever quit it.  Or...

2. ...your life is pretty pathetic and you should probably make an effort to find some hobbies to occupy your free time.

I have to agree with the sentiment, though as RyanAtTanagra said, with more tact. :-)

I have no shortage of things to do. I can start cooking every meal, rather than only those I have time for. I can learn a language. Go hiking/camping/fishing. Travel the US. Travel the world. Finally finish some video games. Read more books. Spend time with family/friends. The list goes on and on.

I would start thinking seriously what you value in life before you FIRE.

Spartana

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #8 on: September 22, 2014, 06:18:09 PM »

 (a) I don't think what you do in an extra day off is necessarily telling of what you'd do when ER.   
^ This.

There is such a big difference between taking time off work - whether a day, a month or even a year - and being ER'd and not planning to work again unless you want to. Your mind set is very different, and how you go about living your life - with all it's unending freedom each and every day - is very different. It's hard to explain but trust me when I say the 2 are vast worlds apart (I've been ER'd over 10 year now) and don't judge what you do and how you feel about being ER'd based on what you do and how you feel taking a little time off work.

Lukim

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #9 on: September 22, 2014, 06:18:40 PM »
I agree with Hotsaucebeard.

I have plenty of money.  I could have retired 6 years ago but I had nothing to do.

For me, work is a love hate thing.  I had just got back yesterday from 2 weeks off - but everyday I was checking my emails and dialing in for conference calls etc.  I was sitting on a tropical island, looking over a beautiful blue sea with my laptop in front of me and feeling bored if I did not have stuff to do.

I could definitely afford to stop work - but then what?

Spartana

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #10 on: September 22, 2014, 06:33:54 PM »
I agree with Hotsaucebeard.

I have plenty of money.  I could have retired 6 years ago but I had nothing to do.

For me, work is a love hate thing.  I had just got back yesterday from 2 weeks off - but everyday I was checking my emails and dialing in for conference calls etc.  I was sitting on a tropical island, looking over a beautiful blue sea with my laptop in front of me and feeling bored if I did not have stuff to do.

I could definitely afford to stop work - but then what?
Maybe FIRE isn't for everyone. If you are happy with your life as it is and don't feel you are missing anything or have any other desires then you are probably doing what you want to do. Basically if you where told you'd die tomorrow or in a week or a year I assume you'd feel you've done everything in life you ever want to do. If that's the case then be at peace with yourself.

Jessa

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #11 on: September 22, 2014, 07:05:11 PM »
Also, you may need to recalibrate your laziness meter -- what you see as "lazy" today may actually be a "healthy & normal" pace you've simply been conditioned by your employer to avoid.

This really resonates with me. I need a lot of down time. I need time to zone out and decompress. I need a lot of sleep. When I'm doing 40 (or 50, or more) hours a week at work, there's rarely enough time to decompress. I have a hard time sleeping, then the next day is harder, and I have less motivation to get anything done. But I do know that when left to my own devices for a while...I get filled up on doing nothing, and start getting excited to work on my hobbies. Because I really want to do them, and not just because "This is the hour of time that is scheduled for this."

ender

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #12 on: September 22, 2014, 07:56:03 PM »
Also, you may need to recalibrate your laziness meter -- what you see as "lazy" today may actually be a "healthy & normal" pace you've simply been conditioned by your employer to avoid.

This really resonates with me. I need a lot of down time. I need time to zone out and decompress. I need a lot of sleep. When I'm doing 40 (or 50, or more) hours a week at work, there's rarely enough time to decompress. I have a hard time sleeping, then the next day is harder, and I have less motivation to get anything done. But I do know that when left to my own devices for a while...I get filled up on doing nothing, and start getting excited to work on my hobbies. Because I really want to do them, and not just because "This is the hour of time that is scheduled for this."

I can relate to this.

I took a week off last year in the middle of doing 50+ hour weeks for a lot of time. I basically crashed, doing nothing.

Towards the end of the week off though I was definitely in the "want to do something constructive" feeling. I don't think it would take me very long to be excited to do all sorts of things if I was FIRE. Though I am taking off 2 days a week all of October so I might have to report back some :)

scottish

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #13 on: September 22, 2014, 08:34:18 PM »
It's not really a crisis, just another problem to be solved.

I work in high tech & I really enjoy my work.     (I don't enjoy dealing with the corporate bureaucracy, mind you, but I don't do much of that these days.)    Once the kids are on their own, we hope to move back to western Canada.     But there's only so much time we can spend in the mountains (5 days a week?   6 days a week?  plus there are a few months when there's not enough snow to ski, but too much to hike and climb...).

So the question is what do I do with all that spare time?      Working on that.    My wife has a small apps company, I could build that up.    I could join an interesting open source project.

Home renovations aren't really my thing, I find most of it is just too much grunt work to be fun.    Heh, I used to say I spent 6 years in engineering school so I wouldn't *have* to shingle my own roof.  It's safe to say I'm not going to do real estate the way MMM does.

Maybe something completely new like... cabinet making?

I'm trying out different things until I find something I like well enough.

Daisy

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #14 on: September 22, 2014, 09:53:41 PM »
Also, you may need to recalibrate your laziness meter -- what you see as "lazy" today may actually be a "healthy & normal" pace you've simply been conditioned by your employer to avoid.

This really resonates with me. I need a lot of down time. I need time to zone out and decompress. I need a lot of sleep. When I'm doing 40 (or 50, or more) hours a week at work, there's rarely enough time to decompress. I have a hard time sleeping, then the next day is harder, and I have less motivation to get anything done. But I do know that when left to my own devices for a while...I get filled up on doing nothing, and start getting excited to work on my hobbies. Because I really want to do them, and not just because "This is the hour of time that is scheduled for this."

+2 (even though there was no official +1 but it was implied)

I had a 5 month unemployment period in the past. I wasn't sure if I was FI, but I was sure happy to get laid off then as I didn't like my job. I purposefully decided to take at least 3 months off and then assess the situation (I got a job at the company I was at prior to the company that laid me off so that ended the fun...so to speak).

I found the first few weeks were full of decompression, walking around my surrounding neighborhoods, exercising more. I spent an afternoon at the beach on a day with a lot of current and just let the water take me down the coast (well it was only for about a half mile or a mile or so). It was wonderful to have this unstructured time. Then after a couple of months I signed up for an art class I always wanted to take. I had time to practice my lessons.

Oh well, I was lucky to get a job back at my old place of employment. I really wasn't ready for FIRE then because of my higher expenses. I hadn't found this website yet, although I had read others.

I tried taking the art classes while employed and found I just didn't have enough unstructured/decompressed time to practice what I was learning so I dropped it for the time being. I do have the time to practice, but with the little bits of time here and there while working, doing chores, trying to stay in shape, cooking, taking care of elderly parents, I just can't get motivated to squeeze in an hour here and there to be creative. I know others can, but I don't think my mind works that way. I'd rather just veg out during those little spurts of free time. Sigh...

Daisy

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #15 on: September 22, 2014, 09:56:06 PM »
And to those that can't help themselves while on vacation and relaxing on the beach, and feel the need to check their work email and bring work along...I just can't relate. I think in order to do that you must really enjoy your work, so maybe you shouldn't FIRE after all. I had a friend do that while we were on vacation in Greece. Glad I never dated him - he's a total workaholic. We were in Greece for goodness sake! I couldn't understand...

I can understand the fear of filling up your time - that's a valid concern. However, I feel like I have enough interests. My fear is having so many interests that my planned FIRE budget would be blown by everything I want to do. I would need to pace myself. I have found though that many times you could get the same enjoyment out of things by just planning better - such as taking advantage of flying somewhere to do various things and slow travel while there for the same cost as it would take for a week....and stuff like that.
« Last Edit: September 22, 2014, 10:02:48 PM by Daisy »

Clever Name

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #16 on: September 23, 2014, 08:00:43 AM »
“‘I’m bored’ is a useless thing to say. I mean, you live in a great, big, vast world that you’ve seen none percent of. Even the inside of your own mind is endless, it goes on forever, inwardly, do you understand? The fact that you’re alive is amazing, so you don’t get to say ‘I’m bored.’”

-Louis C.K.

There are literally an unlimited number of things to do with your free time. I'm sure you would enjoy at least a few million of them.

crazyworld

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #17 on: September 23, 2014, 12:35:36 PM »
Yes, I alternate between wanting to quit and worrying about what-will-i-do??  I do have a kid, so that should keep me busy for a few years.  But I have actually lived through forced unemployment (had to get my credentials and a visa squared away so was not working for about 1.5 years). We were poor grad students, so I cooked/cleaned/walked to grocery store/library etc.  Definitely had periods of ennui. And this was only 1.5 years. We are talking decades of retirement.  I love to read and enjoy more activities now than I used to.  Still, decades is a long time. 
The good thing about it is (atleast my job) provides different issues to deal with so the brain is engaged with a new problem to solve every so often.  Working with interesting people is also a plus for an introvert like me. Yes, i could volunteer. But it would have to be something I enjoy.

oinkette

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #18 on: September 23, 2014, 01:41:01 PM »
I wonder about this as well.  I think those of us in the "a ways to go" camp find it hard to imagine so very much free time!

For example, I love to draw. But by the time I get home from work and the gym (especially as I am mustachian about not using my quicker car) then it's practically dark and my body operates by the sun. Plus I prefer to draw by daylight.   On the weekend I think my mindset is such that it's one of two days off I have and part of me just wants to decompress from work and veg, while my mind thinks of all the stuff I wish I could do while I'm stuck at work, like draw and by the time I get it all figured out, plus take care of all the errands I have to run, it's Monday again! 

I know a couple of people who retired recently (at the normal age) and it seems the only issue is not what to do with your time, but the missing social interaction.  I think as long as there is an idea of what you want to do, you'll be fine.  Certainly no reason to put off being FI! 

To paraphrase something I read on the Early Retirment forums: I've been bored before, but I never thought of work as the solution to it!

Kansas Beachbum

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #19 on: September 23, 2014, 01:48:30 PM »
Anyone else face a mid-mustachian life crisis as you get closer to FIRE?

What are you going to do once you no longer have to work? What if none of the things mentioned in the articles seem interesting to you?

I'm pretty close to FIRE (7/1/16) and I struggle a bit with this...although I do have some interesting hobbies I pursue when I have the chance and don't consider my life away from work to be at all pathetic.  I personally think it has something to do with having spent the last however many years since about Jr. High doing what you had to...making good grades in High School, then getting yourself through college, then finding a job and building a career, then...what.  We've been so focused on what we had to do all these years, while also managing (hopefully) to do some fun stuff, travel, dive, on the side that when the time comes to walk away from it all...it's like, Hmmm, what am I going to do now?  Something tells me I'll come up with something :-)

Gone Fishing

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #20 on: September 23, 2014, 01:48:45 PM »
Hotsauce,

As I approach ER, I do have some concern about becoming fat and lazy once I pull the trigger.  I have many hobbies and I am usually very motivated, but some of this motivation comes from the fact that I know that my time is limited.  I wouldn't call myself a "high energy" person by any stretch, as I typically have to "work up" the motivation/energy to get stuff done.  Knowing this, I plan on having nearly mandatory daily workouts once I RE.  If I know I have to get up and workout in the morning, I will be less likely to over consume the night before.  It will be good for my health, it will get my day started, and will use up a chunk of my day.  I have also compiled of list of things that I want to do.  If I ever feel sluggish, I'll pull out my list and pick something to do.  A little part time work may be in my future as well.

Earlier this year I took a two week vacation to visit family.  Even though I wouldn't call it a relaxing/restful vacation due to the sheer amount of travel and sleeping arrangements, I found myself eager to launch into my hobbies once I got home yet this desire quickly evaporated once I went back to work.  I attribute this to "busy boredom" of my job sucking the life out of me.           

My wife has been laid off twice during the past several years and had trouble staying motivated during these times, but a layoff comes with an emotional component of not being needed as well as the lonelyness of being at home alone (she's a strong extrovert).  She is going to continue to work part time to help maintain motivation.   

pichirino

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #21 on: September 23, 2014, 01:55:56 PM »
Have not approached FIRE yet,but having a very very long vacation (at home) by US standards I could say
that the loads of free time has given me perspective.

FIRE would be better then the alternative of working full time for me.
But when having so much free time available is not hard to fill if ya stick to a plan to keep busy.
It's when you don't have such a plan that monotomy will get ya.

My plan is to work either reduced hours or part time(2-3 days max) when i'm ready for such.
This gives me personally a better balance between free time and working.
I would imagine this would also be like a ladder taking a step down from full time but not full FIRE yet in order
to get used to a different lifestyle instead of going cold turkey.

Then again if not working at all is attractive,plan like hell for every single day cause even a single day can get boring if ya have nothing to do or do something monotomous(watch tv for instance)

libertarian4321

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #22 on: September 23, 2014, 06:03:05 PM »
I agree with Hotsaucebeard.

I have plenty of money.  I could have retired 6 years ago but I had nothing to do.

For me, work is a love hate thing.  I had just got back yesterday from 2 weeks off - but everyday I was checking my emails and dialing in for conference calls etc.  I was sitting on a tropical island, looking over a beautiful blue sea with my laptop in front of me and feeling bored if I did not have stuff to do.

I could definitely afford to stop work - but then what?

Responses like this and that of the OP are really sad.  People are so involved with their job, that they have no life and no identity outside of work.  Essentially, life is their work.  They have no other interest.

Like many of you, I find this kind of response is simply mind boggling.  "Work" is about the last thing we'd want to do with our time. 

To those in the "why not work?  what else could I possibly do?" group, you should probably really make an effort  finding something else to do.  Unless you are one of those sad creatures that plans to die on the job, at some point, you will be retired.  Don't be "that guy" who withers and dies within a year or two of retirement. 

Remember, you once had a real life- maybe it was a long time ago (when you were in college, or just a kid)- what did you like doing back then?  It might still be something you can do today.

Do you have any intellectual curiosity outside the narrow field you work in?  Why not take college classes (maybe even get another degree) or seminars or even (usually free or low cost) adult education courses at your local school?  Not only can you learn something, it might lead to another hobby or activity.

How about volunteering and helping someone?  Work at the local animal shelter, or the food bank.  Teach adults to read.  Volunteer at a VA (or other) hospital.  Volunteer at your local school.  The volunteer possibilities are nearly endless.

Join a club, or several clubs.  Doesn't matter if it's golf, or an investment club, a church, an athletic club, the Kiwanis, or whatever.

Or maybe get involved in politics.  You might even decide to run for office.

Or read read read.  Good God, I have a book list so long I couldn't read it in a hundred lifetimes.

Hell, even playing computer games or binge watching every episode of "Real Housewives of Atlanta" is less pathetic than "I work because I can't think of anything else to do."

I'm sure that with a little effort, you can think of thousands of other possibilities.

You are more than a worker drone tied to a cubicle until the day you die.  You can have interests outside of work, you just need to make the effort to develop them.

Noodle

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #23 on: September 23, 2014, 08:32:55 PM »
I've been watching my parents, who have a very active and happy retirement. One thing I have noticed is that although they do spend some time on hobbies or "fun" activities, it's a relatively small percentage. They spend their time volunteering on several projects, some separately and some together, working on projects and repairs around their home and property--a lot of which are meant to make their house livable as long as possible so as not to go into care, exercising and doing other things to keep their health good, and traveling around to see friends and family who are less mobile than they are. Among their commitments, they both have volunteer projects where they get to do the parts of their jobs they really liked without the nonsense that goes along with getting paid for it. I think what they really like is getting to do all those things at their own pace and schedule, and if they want to hang out with a book for an hour in the middle of the afternoon, or drop everything to go see a grandchild's dance recital, there's no one to tell them otherwise.

So I guess what I'm saying is that just because you don't currently have enough recreational interests to fill every waking hour, don't assume you won't have enough to occupy yourself in retirement. And you may find more when you actually stop work. I have a friend in academia, and every time she goes on summer break or sabbatical, she finds she needs some time to just recover from the working world before she is ready to engage in any major endeavors, personal or professional.

hybrid

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #24 on: September 24, 2014, 06:48:45 AM »
I've met a lot of seniors who ran into this issue when they retired. Going from a routine of working (for decades) to suddenly not working is a huge adjustment and not something to be underestimated. People find comfort in their routines, even if the routines are less than enjoyable. Many folks I've met say it takes a good six months to a year to adjust to. Think of the long term prisoner, once freed, who has trouble adjusting to a completely different way of living (sometimes to the point of getting arrested again for the "normalcy" of the prison routine). It's the same concept. There is comfort in routine, so there is comfort in work, even unsatisfying work.

The missus and I have discussed this some. When she retires her world is going to get flipped on its head. We are already anticipating that she will be out of sorts and potentially drifting for a bit while she finds her new bearings post-employment. It will be an adjustment for both of us, especially since I will still be working for quite a while yet. We'll both be making a bunch of (hopefully pleasant) changes to our routine.

I told her I expect my boxers to be ironed and folded in the post-retirement world.... Well, maybe still working on that one.  ;-)

crazyworld

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #25 on: September 24, 2014, 08:46:21 AM »
I agree with Hotsaucebeard.

I have plenty of money.  I could have retired 6 years ago but I had nothing to do.

For me, work is a love hate thing.  I had just got back yesterday from 2 weeks off - but everyday I was checking my emails and dialing in for conference calls etc.  I was sitting on a tropical island, looking over a beautiful blue sea with my laptop in front of me and feeling bored if I did not have stuff to do.

I could definitely afford to stop work - but then what?

Responses like this and that of the OP are really sad.  People are so involved with their job, that they have no life and no identity outside of work.  Essentially, life is their work.  They have no other interest.

Like many of you, I find this kind of response is simply mind boggling.  "Work" is about the last thing we'd want to do with our time. 

To those in the "why not work?  what else could I possibly do?" group, you should probably really make an effort  finding something else to do.  Unless you are one of those sad creatures that plans to die on the job, at some point, you will be retired.  Don't be "that guy" who withers and dies within a year or two of retirement. 

Remember, you once had a real life- maybe it was a long time ago (when you were in college, or just a kid)- what did you like doing back then?  It might still be something you can do today.

Do you have any intellectual curiosity outside the narrow field you work in?  Why not take college classes (maybe even get another degree) or seminars or even (usually free or low cost) adult education courses at your local school?  Not only can you learn something, it might lead to another hobby or activity.

How about volunteering and helping someone?  Work at the local animal shelter, or the food bank.  Teach adults to read.  Volunteer at a VA (or other) hospital.  Volunteer at your local school.  The volunteer possibilities are nearly endless.

Join a club, or several clubs.  Doesn't matter if it's golf, or an investment club, a church, an athletic club, the Kiwanis, or whatever.

Or maybe get involved in politics.  You might even decide to run for office.

Or read read read.  Good God, I have a book list so long I couldn't read it in a hundred lifetimes.

Hell, even playing computer games or binge watching every episode of "Real Housewives of Atlanta" is less pathetic than "I work because I can't think of anything else to do."

I'm sure that with a little effort, you can think of thousands of other possibilities.

You are more than a worker drone tied to a cubicle until the day you die.  You can have interests outside of work, you just need to make the effort to develop them.

I think you are over simplifying the issue a bit; currently, with work/child/home I find work to be definitely in my way and wish I could take a break.  I have always read and still make time for it.  Love to travel - can never get enough of that. Love to workout and walk and do yoga.  But, after the kid leaves for college, I know from personal experience that all the above activities are not really sufficient to fill all day, day after day, year after year.  And I say this a slow mover - I take forever to do everything, unlike some hyper-efficient people I know who can whiz through 10 things before I have finished my morning tea.  I have not identified something specific like (taking MMM's example) blogging/DIY etc that I am interested in.  Perhaps that will come when I have time to look into it?  Also, the social aspect can be an issue.  Especially for people that are not naturally extroverted.  Consider too that my work is really almost the opposite of everything that people usually complain about and that makes it harder to give up.  I have no horror story to relate about work at all, only that as of now, I don't have enough time to show up for it everyday.

Rural

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #26 on: September 24, 2014, 04:09:09 PM »
I told her I expect my boxers to be ironed and folded in the post-retirement world.... Well, maybe still working on that one.  ;-)


Be careful with that, now. If my husband said anything of the sort to me, he'd find his boxers starched. :-)

palebluedot

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #27 on: September 24, 2014, 10:16:52 PM »
I read this David Caine essay today and thought it was relevant to OP's topic: http://www.raptitude.com/2014/04/quitting-the-9-to-5/

One paragraph really hit me:
"Independence has to be practiced throughout life beginning as early as possible, because by the time we recognize the need to escape, we’re extremely dependent on the day-to-day controls provided by school and work culture. This makes change a steeper proposition with every year that goes by.

EvenKeeled

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #28 on: October 01, 2014, 12:53:48 AM »

 (a) I don't think what you do in an extra day off is necessarily telling of what you'd do when ER.   
^ This.

There is such a big difference between taking time off work - whether a day, a month or even a year - and being ER'd and not planning to work again unless you want to. Your mind set is very different, and how you go about living your life - with all it's unending freedom each and every day - is very different. It's hard to explain but trust me when I say the 2 are vast worlds apart (I've been ER'd over 10 year now) and don't judge what you do and how you feel about being ER'd based on what you do and how you feel taking a little time off work.
I'd love to hear more about how ER feels so different to you from taking time off. It's hard for me to imagine ER. I'd like to feel a sense of freedom, and no worries about how I'm going to make money to pay the bills...ever again!

hdatontodo

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #29 on: October 01, 2014, 05:34:25 AM »
Stay out of the kitchen where the beer is.

Stay away from the TV where you might sit to drink the beer.

Stay away from the liquor store which sells the beer.

Plan an inexpensive vacation. Take a class. Take a walk around the block. Look carefully at your residence for repairs. Look for weeds in your garden. Vacuum out your car. Go through every item you own and clear out unneeded items. Call up family members. Address your Christmas cards. Go to the zoo. Visit a museum. Work on research for your family tree.

hybrid

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #30 on: October 01, 2014, 06:16:37 AM »
I told her I expect my boxers to be ironed and folded in the post-retirement world.... Well, maybe still working on that one.  ;-)


Be careful with that, now. If my husband said anything of the sort to me, he'd find his boxers starched. :-)

That's the current arrangement, so it must get better in retirement! ;-)

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #31 on: October 01, 2014, 06:41:44 AM »
I too worried about being bored after retirement.  I knew I wold be fine in the summer.  I was a college teacher most of my working life and had two months off - two weeks to decompress (we called it our annual nervous breakdown), four weeks to enjoy summer, and two weeks to rev up to going back to school.  Summer breaks were never long enough.  But winter - short days, cold, snow, no garden - that worried me.

Well, one year later, I love it.  I picked up long-neglected hobbies, started a new one (playing an instrument), joined another club and am its secretary, do therapy visits with the dog, and am generally at the point where I am not wiling to add anything else.

However, you have to be able to organize yourself.  I was told at a faculty retirement seminar that College and University faculty are good at retirement because we have been mostly self-directed all through our careers.  True, but I also know a lot of other retirees who had all sorts of different careers, and are now super busy.  Now that most women are working, the community volunteer pool doesn't have all the SAHMs to do things, and it is the active retirees who have taken over filling those needs.

So a little self-reflection about your interests and new goals should get your life started on its new course.


EscapeVelocity2020

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #32 on: October 01, 2014, 07:10:26 AM »
Not to go off on too big a tangent, but NPR had a piece on a company (Aptify) that offered 'unlimited paid time off'.  http://www.npr.org/2014/09/30/352751249/preventing-worker-burnout-can-boost-the-bottom-line

Got me thinking, maybe life shouldn't be so black and white between full time workers and fully retired.  There really needs to be a new model, depending on what industry you are in (unfortunately, the under-educated and unmotivated still get screwed by market forces, just too much supply and too little demand).  But let talented, otherwise motivated successful people, on the verge of burnout, take that open-ended sabbatical and figure out what they want out of life.  You shouldn't have to quit to figure out if you wanted to retire early or not...

nyxst

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #33 on: October 01, 2014, 08:11:21 AM »
My list of what I'd rather be doing (instead of working for "the Man".....
- Planning projects for/with my kids
- Sewing projects (big sellers with friends and online! all up-cycled materials)
- Baking
- More time to plan and prepare healthy meals from scratch
- Grow veggie garden (I start one every year and never maintain it... facepunch)
- More time to bike/walk to places (if I had TIME, I would bike and walk everywhere)
- work on some start-up company ideas bouncing around in my head for years..
- crochet hats for cancer patients
- volunteer more often (now I just do tax season.... )
- woodworking projects (awesome dragon pull toy needs some tweeking!)
- up-cycle furniture
- paint wall mural that I have been imagining for a decade
- get pottery kiln up and running and set my wheel up!
- lots and lots of nature hikes
- be the "guest reader" at my daughters school and be a PTO member
- get a greenhouse up and running - divide and re-pot plants
- coach an Odyssey of the Mind team for school
- tutor for local community college
The list goes on ... and on... and on... basically I daydream at work about what I would rather be doing... all ... the .... time....
Haha!

retired?

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #34 on: October 01, 2014, 08:31:48 AM »
OP, I think it is fine to ask this question.  I quit my job last June and had been so focused on work and family time that, unfortunately, I did not have time to develop hobbies.  What my wife and kids want to do is not the same as what I want to do.  Weekends or evenings were often spent in a compromise.

So, with some people, including me, it will take effort.  After some time of not doing much of anything, I think most people will wake up and start scheduling activities.  It's just a matter of actually doing it.  I found that I needed to develop a routine so that my day wasn't entirely wasted (well reading, relaxing, gardening.....).  Do a little housework, do more of the kid-stuff my wife had always covered.

Planning beforehand for a smooth transition is probably wise.

GetItRight

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #35 on: October 01, 2014, 08:32:20 AM »
I can relate, when I do have free time I am content to maybe work on a few small projects, clean, have some beer, read a book, sit by the water, read things of interest on the internet... Generally be lazy but try to get a few minor things done. I find on a real vacation it takes about a week of mostly being lazy and I then get moving with projects, plan mini trips or things to do, and generally enjoy being more active vs the initial unwinding of enjoying being more passive. Also I find when I take vacations I get up an hour or two earlier than I do for work, without an alarm or hitting snooze a time or two.

For me I'm burnt out from 50+ hour weeks all the time, so many emergencies and crisis, that it takes a bit to reset and be able to reset and enjoy more of active the things I like doing. I say go ahead have another beer and be lazy, just don't make a habit of doing it every day. When you have a 1-2 day weekend half consisting of getting your errands and tasks caught up for the following week it's hard to be motivated to take initiative on other things. I think once you ER you'll find things to fill your time with after you have a little time to unwind and catch up on personal things.

nyxst

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #36 on: October 01, 2014, 09:14:11 AM »
I forgot some....
- go camping
- go canoeing/kayaking/sailing (I already have free access to the boats.. but who has time???)
- get back into nature photography
- pick up the viola again and get back into the County orchestra
- make clothes that I actually like instead of the crap I buy off of shelves
- try my hand as a motivational speaker
- write my life story
- finish the 30 fiction novels I have started through the years
- try textile weaving
- set up my etsy shop with my hand stamped jewelry and chain mail jewelery
**edit... because I thought of more!
- resume martial arts training and teaching
- commit to daily meditation
- learn to ride a motorcycle
- visit and spend more time with friends that live far
- finish my college degree in half the time!
« Last Edit: October 02, 2014, 08:18:49 AM by nyxst »

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #37 on: October 01, 2014, 09:56:56 AM »
So Hotsauce, did any of this help you?

Noodle

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #38 on: October 01, 2014, 11:33:37 AM »
For those who are concerned about slipping into inertia in retirement, maybe a "trigger point" would be helpful. That is the practice that before you implement a risky new idea, you decide ahead of time at what point you will change direction (so for instance, if you started a new business, you might give yourself X months to make a profit, or if you are undergoing fertility treatment, you will spend X dollars). The idea is that you decide while you are still objective how much rope to give yourself, because once you're in the middle of a situation it's too hard to make clear-headed decisions. (The idea comes from "Decisive" by Chip and Dan Heath, which I recommend, but I think they are not the originators). So maybe you decide that you will give yourself three months after retirement to do whatever the spirit moves in you, and then if by 3 months you don't have a clear direction/set of activities in place, you'll take X action (look for part-time work, start interviewing possible volunteer opportunities, plan a trip, register for classes, whatever).

golden1

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #39 on: October 01, 2014, 12:20:40 PM »
I find this thread a bit sad, mostly because I think this attitude is common in the US in particular.  It really comes down to one question.

"Who are you without your job?" 

One reason why I keep coming back to this forum is that most people here see their work as a means to an end, not an end in itself.  Neither approach is wrong, but I relate to the former, not the latter.  I like my job for the most part, but it is not the reason for my existence and if I got laid off, I would be concerned that my income stream would be gone, but I would not be depressed or feel worthless.  My fundamental worth is not in what I do, it is who I am. 

I can think of about 20 things off the top of my head I would do if I didn't work.  A few of them are:

Sleep more
Cook more and eat healthier
Run more - probably marathons instead of the 5k-10k distances I do now
Join a choral group
Home improvement projects
Volunteer more in my kids school
Volunteer for other causes
Play more video games :P 
Read, read, read!
Travel

I think that list would fill up most of my time.  I definitely would spend some time decompressing, and then I would ramp up gradually.       

OzzieandHarriet

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Re: Money is time, but what do you do with it?
« Reply #40 on: October 01, 2014, 11:18:40 PM »
I've been retired (hard to say that, in a way, but it's true) for a little over a year now, and I have had no trouble filling my time. By the time I practice both of my instruments, take my exercise walk, and cook dinner, most of the day is unbelievably gone. Those are the slow days … other days, I get together with some other musicians to read string quartets, or I teach, or I rehearse, or I take my piano lesson, or I do some freelance work. My days are really full.

But in my case, I was a musician before I started working in an office, and I never felt my job was my calling or identity. It was just a job. When it got to be unpleasant, I was lucky that still-working husband, frugal habits, and lots of savings as backup enabled me to quit.

There are actually some other things I was hoping to get into more, like going back to reading for fun, taking better care of the house, and sewing more of my clothes, but I haven't had time for them!

My old workplace recently asked me to work part-time freelance for them this fall, ~15 hours a week, and I turned it down because I couldn't imagine how I'd fit it in even if it was something I wanted to do, which it wasn't.

 

Wow, a phone plan for fifteen bucks!