The Money Mustache Community
Learning, Sharing, and Teaching => Ask a Mustachian => Topic started by: Osprey on February 17, 2012, 10:10:53 AM
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Hi
Any advanced lady mustachians out there? I find myself spending money in areas where my boyfriend doesn't: hair cuts, makeup, lingerie, etc. I really enjoy these trappings of femininity. Pretty sure this is anti-mustachian!
Over the past few months I have made some changes: using bicarb to wash my hair; olive oil as moisturiser; minimal makeup; an epilator instead of razors or wax; a small neutrals-based mix&match wardrobe. I am very proud of these new habits but I know I can do more.
Mrs MMM had a post about lady-trappings being unnecessary but I can't seem to let go of wanting to "spoil myself" and "look good". It's part vanity and part fear. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
A million thank yous in advance...
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Dunno if I can be considered an "advanced lady stache" since I'm a brokeass graduate student who just started really paying attention to her cash flow. BUT I feel somewhat qualified to comment on this since I'm both girly and reluctant to spend too much money on overly frivolous things.
I have "lady-trappings" but I try to be fairly simple/minimalist with them. Which means I wear makeup, but I mostly try to make do with my current tiny makeup 'stash instead of shelling out for new trends every season. I try to get creative and mix things up so I don't get bored. I'm on a roll with not buying new items unless it's replacing another item that I deem as necessary. I pay close attention to cost/oz. for staple items so I get the most bang for my buck. I have fairly minimal skincare- cleanser, moisturizer, SPF, acne treatment. If I want a fancy mask or scrub, I'll make a homemade version with stuff in my cupboards (oatmeal, yogurt, honey, all work as brilliant skincare items). When I get my haircut, I ask for a style that'll be easy to replicate without many products or much time. I won't color my hair until it starts turning gray, though admittedly the women in my family tend to gray early and I don't plan to accept it without a fight.
Like you, I try to stick with a fairly minimal wardrobe and seeing it as a challenge to mix and match what I have. If I need to replace something, I scour secondhand stores to see if I can find it there before shelling out at a store. If I do buy something new, I go for the most long lasting item I can find in a reasonable budget. I don't buy clothes that don't work for my life (like most heels, which I can't walk in). I'm slowly learning to mend and repair minor issues so I can milk every bit of life out of my clothes.
Lately I've spent less time and money on clothes/makeup and more getting outside, eating healthy food, developing healthy habits. I figure if I look fairly healthy and fit, then I'll look good even in old clothes with minimal makeup. Not that I'm ever going to be a model that can put on a sack and look great, but I can at least look decent in a plain tee and jeans. Being healthy is a way of taking care of myself AND my appearance that's relatively cheap.
I'm sure there are women with far more mustachian habits than me who can chime in. Basically, mine comes down to "use what you have, replace if necessary, don't buy new if possible". But thus far, in my infant years of learning to budget and save, this is how I've maintained a look I enjoy without spending a substantial portion of my money on it.
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Great topic! I hope you don't mind if I pipe in. :)
There are certain areas of lady-hood that I do participate in. For example, I tweeze my eyebrows, but luckily that just requires a one-time purchase of tweezers (I've had them waxed maybe 3 times in my life, but I can see how some would get in the habit). I also get my hair cut at a salon, but I do it once a year on my birthday. I own nail polish that I've had for several years and occasionally I'll put some on my toenails. I also shave with a razor, but I do it in the shower and I find my razors last a really long time. Finally, I own some make-up, but I only use it on special occasions when I want to look good so it also lasts a very long time.
I've mentioned this before, but I think the thing that makes me feel the most awesome is exercise and being fit and healthy. I spoil myself with an expensive membership to a crossfit gym, but it is worth it to me. However, before joining crossfit, I ran and biked a lot and did "free" activities, which were equally energizing. I think that after giving birth, when I was at an all-time low in the confidence/looks department, is when I started thinking about buying stuff more. But, once I got back in shape, those cravings went away.
I think that like other things, adapting a do-it-yourself attitude makes a big difference. Women spend a lot on outsourcing their beauty with services (manicures, pedicures, haircuts, waxing, etc.), but you can do these things yourself at home. Plus, if you limit these things to special occasions, then they feel better when you do them.
I think the key is to not make these things a habit, but to make them count when you do them and make sure you get full enjoyment from them. And, of course, to learn to appreciate your real beauty (inside and out).
P.S. I don't buy lingerie or much clothing, but when I do, I make sure it is something I love. For example, I spent a long time recently finding the right bathing suit. I love it and now I know I have a great bathing suit to wear for years to come. I do the same thing with my wardrobe, although everything I have is pretty casual and sporty (I'm not very fancy).
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I can't claim to be an advanced mustachian, but I don't tend to spend much on feminine things. It can be tough though when you are still working (as I am). I'm going to be applying for new jobs soon and I really feel like I am judged on appearance more than guys: meaning I will need to get my hair dyed again to cover the greys (I'm only 35 and look a fair bit younger except for the grey hairs) and get my eyebrows waxed in order to look 'professional' enough for interviewing. I might even need to buy some make-up, which I never usually bother wearing.
I completely agree with onehappypanda and Mrs MM about focusing on living a healthy lifestyle rather than spending loads of money on clothes, make-up, spa treatments and so on. I spend about 7 or so hours a week at the gym (I know, there are cheaper ways to get your exercise, but I really enjoy group exercise classes and it's my main form of recreation during the week) and drink lots of water, and as well as the health benefits, it means my complexion looks fine without make-up, and I look okay in presentable but not overly expensive clothes. My Mum spends hours doing her make-up and styling her hair, and I've never understood why people would want to waste that much time, then say they don't have time to exercise :-/
Despite not wearing make-up or getting manicures, I do succumb to societal pressure regarding hair removal. Like Mrs MM, I own a razor and tweezers. I find it hard to get the eyebrow shape right though so get my brows waxed once in a while, then keep them in check with tweezers until they are obviously in need of a proper re-shaping again. I get my waxing and hair styling (simple timeless style that is low maintenance) done by students at the local College, which keeps the costs down.
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Thank you all for the detailed and useful advice!
I did not completely make the link between health and lipstick until reading your replies but of course it seems obvious now. More time spent being healthy = more likely to look and feel good = less time and inclination to buy things that make me look and feel good!
Simplifying routines and using products until they are finished is difficult, but I see how it can make a big difference. The same for making haircuts a rare treat instead of a quick pick-me-up. Hair removal is the bane of my existence though, but I guess this is not the place to complain about patriarchy and such :)
My biggest breakthrough today is "ah-hah"ing that making changes to my mindset will help me be content with the changes that I make to my habits. Thank goodness for this forum!
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Although expensive haircuts are not my temptation in life, I have a friend who likes to keep her hair short and bold and she shared with me this tip: stylists looking for a promotion at their salon frequently look for hair models on Craigslist. Free haircut!
Obvious cons to the plan are 1) these postings are usually put up with short notice, 2) often the stylist needs to demonstrate a certain style, i.e. "above the shoulders" or "no layers," and 3) you might get a more inexperienced hairstylist than you usually pay for. It may be that experienced hairstylists wanting to move forward in their careers occasionally need models too...someone with more knowledge of the biz would know this.
Anyway, searching "free haircut" my local Craigslist pulled up a few of these ads for hair models, one posted as recently as two days ago. Might be worth a call to your favorite salons to see if they ever do this and if they can put you on a contact list.
EDIT: searching "hair model" on the Craiglist "services" board came up with a ton of results!
http://boston.craigslist.org/search/?areaID=4&subAreaID=&query=hair+model&catAbb=bbb
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Although expensive haircuts are not my temptation in life, I have a friend who likes to keep her hair short and bold and she shared with me this tip: stylists looking for a promotion at their salon frequently look for hair models on Craigslist. Free haircut!
I forgot about this option! As I get older I find myself less into staying in style. However, as I get older, I feel like I need more maintenance, especially for the professional scene. $80 haircuts twice a year was normal for me until about three years ago. I've been letting it grow out and feeling pretty frumpy because of it.
Also, I have to admit this zone is the hardest for me to adapt to in the Mustachian way. I can fend of the shiny magazines and tv ads, but am weak to the influence of my mother. (Hopefully the money spent on therapy will eventually recoup itself in this regard.)
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I have been thinking about this a lot lately. I work out hard 6 days a week, and I eat a ton of fruits and veggies. I am still trying to shake the sugar habit though. Anyways, it takes me about 15 minutes to get ready everyday. I shower, comb my hair, and get dressed. I would much rather spend my time working out than putting on makeup or doing my hair. I think this all works out better in the warmer months when you can actually see the results of your work by wearing shorts, sundresses etc. In the winter, I do feel a bit frumpy at times.
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Oh, this is the second most difficult part of embracing a more mustachian lifestyle (for me, personally).
I've come a long way, though. About two years ago at the ripe old age of 24 when I started to get the first inkling that my habit of spending more than I earned wasn't going to do me any favors in the long run, I began seriously tracking and recording all of my expenses. What I saw after a year of recording shocked me. The "routine upkeep" of my "rebellious" haircolors (blue, pink, fire-engine red, whatever) were costing me upwards of $2000 annually. The day I saw that, I decided to stop coloring my hair entirely. I also decided to change my hair care routine at the same time and stopped using styling products or any heat tools (including a blow dryer). I also switched to more natural, paraben-and-sulfate-free shampoos and conditioners.
It took a while to develop a positive attitude about it, but now my natural dark-blonde color has grown out about 7 inches and I can't wait to be one of the only women I know with long, shiny, totally natural and virgin hair. It might not be long before I start going gray - I figure I might as well enjoy my natural color while I have it. I am (so far) fully committed to embracing gray hair when it comes, though. I think that's so admirable and beautiful.
Beyond the hair, my beauty routines have always been simple. Some $1.50 generic body lotion, some mascara, and chapstick. I do wear nail polish daily, but I have never gotten a professional manicure. I have a few $2 bottles from Target and I've gotten very good (through practice) at doing near-perfect manis at home. I have an epilator for hair removal (ouch!). I have only a handful of mix-and-match basic outfits bought at rock-bottom clearance prices.
Do I feel frumpy sometimes? You bet. But I know it has absolutely nothing to do with my cosmetics/fashion, or lack thereof. I do not feel any less beautiful now than I did before I began growing my money mustache. I keep myself clean and neat and presentable, like always. If I feel dumpy on a given day, it's usually because my skin doesn't look great, or I feel bloated or gained a few pounds, which (as Mrs. MM sagely pointed out) is all about diet and lifestyle choices, not purchases.
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Hi All:
Occasionally I treat myself to girly lotions, etc. AT THE DOLLAR STORE! You can have a lot of fun for about five bucks! (Just made some nice bath stuff baskets for my girls for Valentine's Day).
I also just checked out one of those neighborhood circulars that you get for free in the mail, and noticed that they have really good coupons for things like eight dollar haircuts.
However, I"m an older stash (47) and I have to confess that my weakness is BOTOX (I tell myself it's for work, but mostly it's for me!). Just found a coupon for 9 bucks a unit, rather than the usual 11 or 12 -- which is good, since I usually need about 10 units every three months.
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I applaud you for starting to cut back on the consumerism surrounding various girl products, and it looks like you're going more natural as a side-benefit too. I use sweet almond oil as a moisturizer and apple cider vinegar for my hair myself, and they've worked as well as any bottled chemicals have.
My personal take is that frugality is critical but, as MMM would say, not at the cost of making yourself miserable. Many things that we want (healthy food, exercise, etc.) can be obtained for much more cheaply than the average consumer pays for them, and that is the goal I think -- not cutting them out completely if they're important to us. Whether or not the things that are important to us ought to be important to us is a separate discussion that is definitely worth having, but nonetheless separate.
It's also a matter of what each individual is used to (which is not to say you can't get used to doing things differently) as well as environment. I have kind of a quirky personality/upbringing and I've passed 25 years of my life without caring to get a manicure, pedicure, profession waxing, you name it. But in my workplace environment, I do feel the need to look more than passably presentable, so I tweeze, wax, and trim my cuticles at home and such. No nail polish or makeup though, as I have sensitive skin and a slight paranoia about chemicals. So I would probably fall under the category of fairly frugal in this area, but I still consider, say, tweezers to be a purchase well worth the cost. It's where I personally drew my line, based on what's important to me, and that's where everyone's mileage is going to vary.
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I wear some eye makeup almost every day, since I'm young and single and for years never wore makeup. I also use natural personal care products, which tend to be more expensive even though I do try to buy them in bulk.
Another weakness is that I get my hair cut professionally every 3 months, on the dot. My hair is very fine and short-ish, so if I go longer than 3 months without a haircut it starts getting frizzy and stringy looking. I would get my haircut more often, but I force myself to wait the full three months. It works out to $120 a year, but as I love my hairdresser and she works magic, my haircuts always make me feel good so I think it's well worth it.
What's the deal with epilators? Do they hurt? How much are they, and how long do they last? Thanks!
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I am in my late 50's and grew up in a time when women didn't always wear makeup, so I never got used to using it very much. Now I use foundation and lipstick about once a day (the lipstick lasts forever). I should use the lipstick more often, but I forget. I am getting 'older' skin, so I use Target-brand anti-ageing lotion and eye cream. I used to use a fancy pyramid marketing brand, but it was expensive and the packaging was horrible. The Target stuff works almost as well.
I have never dyed my hair, and it is going gray. I've thought about dying it, as the gray does make me look older, but feminist knee-jerk reaction and just plain laziness have kept me from it so far. I keep it short and get it cut about every 6-8 weeks. I have been told that it looks good.
I second Mrs. MM about keeping fit. It's much more important to keep going on exercise that you enjoy than to spend on fancy treatments and makeup. I spend on ballet classes, and am planning to start spending more on massage, since I developed shoulder problems last year and spent several hundred dollars on doctors and chiropractors. I would rather have spent the money on massage and felt better for it.
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What's the deal with epilators? Do they hurt? How much are they, and how long do they last? Thanks!
Hair removal is the bane of my existence. I switched to an epilator for a few reasons: A) my leg hair is apparently made of steel and completely dulls even the most expensive razor after just one use, B) I find tweezing individual hairs to be excruciatingly painful and tedious, C) I felt like waxing constantly was damaging my skin (all the pulling and stretching and ripping and sometimes pulling off some surface skin), and D) trimmers just don't give me that baby-soft skin I look for when I shave or wax or whatever.
Yes, the epilator hurts. It feels exactly like you would expect it to feel - I'm not going to lie to you. It definitely feels like you are ripping clumps of hair out. The good news is that it does NOT feel as bad as individually plucking several hairs, since it happens very fast, and you do build up a little bit of a tolerance to it. I do not have particularly sensitive skin, but my pain threshold is pretty low. Your mileage may vary, but it's been worthwhile for me. You'd have to bribe me with a LOT of money to try it on my underarms or other more sensitive areas, though. That skin is much more wimpy than legs, so I do keep a razor on hand for that sort of thing.
I use a Braun Silk-Epil Soft Perfection epilator. It cost about $30 from Amazon, and it's the kind that has tons of tiny little tweezer heads that open and close (I'm pretty sure that's how they all work now). If I had it to do again, I would've read more reviews and bought a somewhat more expensive and more efficient model. Mine is fine, and it still works the same after a year of heavy use, but it does miss some hairs and cut others rather than fully removing them. My mother has used an Epilady since the 1980s when those first hit the market - the kind with that coiled-up Slinky-looking spring that catches your hairs and rips them out like some bracelets do to your arm hairs. Hers still works absolutely perfectly after almost 30 years, but hurts a lot more. I'm sure mine won't last more than a few years.
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This is a fascinating thread! And this is the Stella half of Landor n Stella posting.
Since I work in a very professional atmosphere, I have to keep up with appearances and "dress up". I've found a couple of ways to do this without spending super bucks on it and without getting bored of my wardrobe (which is where most of my impulse clothing purchases used to come from). So this advice is from the working professional perspective. I will probably radically change my wardrobe once I no longer have to work in that environment any more.
On clothes: find the swankiest/wealthiest suburb or town near you, and then shop that Goodwill/Salvation army. I have gotten top name brand clothing in mint or near mint condition for pennies at the one about an hour away from my house. My best pull: an Ann Taylor Loft blazer/suit jacket for $4, with the tags still on and the retail price listed at $129.99. Some pitiful lady paid that for it, never wore it, and donated it for me to find! Also my Goodwill has half off the whole store on the first Saturday of the month, so I go about twice a year and try to hit that Saturday, and I get even more off my already great deals!
On building a wardrobe: First, pick a neutral color and stick to it. If you look good in blacks and grays, do it, if you look good in browns and tans, do that. Then, everything you buy should match with or coordinate with that neutral. Shoes and coats included. That way you do not have to maintain two separate color lines. Build up your basics: slacks (3 pairs), jackets (4-5) and camisoles (I have too many of these, but probably you should have 2 of each basic color and a couple in other colors). Then fill in with shirts for cold and warm weather to match with your basics. Stick with the colors you like or that look good on you. Then rotate through the seasons. If you search "30 for 30 remix challenge" in google, you should come up on some fashion blogs that explain how to take only 30 items and remix them to make 30 different outfits using basics, some fun shirts, and some creativity. I do this periodically to remind myself that I have good, interesting clothes to wear and it keeps me from going out shopping when I get bored with my wardrobe.
Shoes: I buy high quality shoes and wear them until they look ratty. I have an open toe pair for summer and a closed toe pair for winter. Sometimes I will get flats and other times heels, but I always wear them until they are falling apart before buying new ones. It simplifies the choices in the morning.
Makeup: I have a foundation that is powder and all-natural, made by a local friend of mine. It's fabulous! a little pricey but mine has lasted over a year. I also have blush from her line of makeup, and it will probably last me the rest of my life. I get new mascara and eyeliner every 6 months, and I have the same eyeshadow for a year or more before getting a new one. My friend's line of makeup is here: http://www.melangecosmetics.com/about.htm (http://www.melangecosmetics.com/about.htm)
Haircuts: I lucked out here, I have very curly hair so even if I get a nice cut it hardly matters or can be seen since the curls just bounce up and hide the trim anyway. So I only go every 3 months or so.
Other than that, I don't spend much on myself. No pedis or manis, if I want one I'll do it myself. But I rarely do because I pick and it looks terrible after a day or so because of the picking at it. I only shave in the summer or when I know I'm going swimming and my razors last a while because I do it in the shower. Soap and lotion I just get the basic stuff.
I hope this helps if any of you are still out there working in the professional scene. I've been doing this for 4 years and no one has every commented negatively on me wearing the same shoes every day all winter long, for example. Odds are no one but you will even notice (ok, maybe if your shoes are a bright color or something, mine are just basic black). And shopping the thrift stores or even consignment stores for secondhand suits and things is a huge saver.
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I've never been into all the girly girl stuff most women seem to love. I have, however, always admired and aspired to the "model" concept. Models need to be thin(which I knew should be in a healthy way), confident, with good skin and healthy hair. This makes them a blank slate on which nearly anything will look good. They need to take care of themselves because their income depends on it. They value themselves.
I also knew very early on that most fashion/make-up/primping wasn't done for personal pleasure or expression but was often done as a disguise for perceived shortcomings, a cry for attention, or to please others in a professional or romantic way. Dressing for others is stupid since you're only guessing at what they think in the first place and if you really think you're being judged for your appearance then nothing you ever wear will be good enough.
Also, polls reveal time after time that men overwhelmingly prefer the natural look over the fancy look when looking for a potential mate. In work settings, basic professional dress and natural looking hair and make-up are also desired as they say that you are all business.
When you're happy with who you are on the inside, your outward appearance is of little consequence providing it isn't offensive to others.
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Hi all. Very interesting thread!
I'm not sure I have much to add, but when reading all of your replies one or two things popped into my head!
1. I'm 24 and I'm already going grey. It doesn't seem to bother me like it's worrying some of you though. It's a natural part of life, and whilst I feel quite young to have greying hair already, I think there are more important things in my life for me to worry about. I went to an all girls' school and quite a few of the teachers had really stylish grey hair - that's what I'm going to aim for! I think as long as we all avoid getting perms and a blue rinse, we'll be ok! :)
2. I still buy nice soaps, which I know isn't very mustachian of me. However, I bulk buy them during the Christmas sales, and so I get brands I like quite cheap. This Christmas I bought a lot of soap from The Body Shop when they had 50% off sales. I use soap for washing, shaving and removing stains from clothes and I like that they smell nice (I'm also willing to pay more to have environmentally-friendly products, so I won't compromise my ideals for cost).
3. I agree with some of the other commenters that it's best to buy clothes and shoes that suit you (and your lifestyle). You can't be mustachian and be a slave to fashion, but you can be mustachian and look stylish! I work in quite a relaxed office (clothes-wise), so when I need a new item of clothing I try to find something that will work in the office and at home. The same goes for my footwear. There's no point in buying a pair of shoes you can only wear once a month.
I do think the men folk get it easier - especially in smart work environments. A suit and they're done! There's more expectation in society for women to look like they've stepped out of a magazine, and I think you need to have faith in yourself to ignore that and do what works for you.
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In work settings, basic professional dress and natural looking hair and make-up are also desired as they say that you are all business.
Actually, this part is not true. Studies show that women who are made-up are perceived as more competent than natural-looking women, and the more made-up the better (w/o going to extremes). That is actually what made me start wearing make-up to work (a daily struggle, as I hate wearing make-up). Its a stupid double standard, but that doesn't make it untrue.
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I'd like to see that study AJ since it's a complete 180 from the study I read a few years ago. And I never said no make-up, just natural looking, asset enhancing make-up so on that point your study agrees with the study I saw. I'd like to read their opinion of "more" make-up and what that means exactly.
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IMHO this is one of those areas where it depends on your personal preferences and confidence levels more so than any one 'right' way. I can see an argument for not being overly made up at work, but I can also say from my own personal experience, I am shallow enough to think more highly of someone who is well groomed. I don't think 'well groomed' needs to involve much more than a bit of sun protecting moisturiser, tweezers, a brush and possibly some lip balm. I consider myself in the more 'high maintenance' camp, as I wear makeup and style my hair most days of the week. I typically just wear a bit of blush, mascara and lip gloss on the weekends, and feel more comfortable with a full routine including foundation, powder and eyeshadow/liner for going to work or fancy events (all in natural tones; I don't have lots and lots of different eyeshadow colours or 30 different blushes like some women like to have).
Even though I like my nails and skin to look nice, it's really easy and cheap to maintain at home with the right products. For example sugar is a fantastic exfoliant, and honey is a humectant, making it a great mask on its own or with other ingredients. A bottle of nail polish will typically last months. You can keep your fingers and toes looking pretty for much less than a single mani/pedi, even if you put forth a one time expenditure for fancy top coats or luxury tools like cuticle trimmers. Olive oil and avocado are both great for deep conditioning hair treatments (which I like to do every month or so with all the heat abuse I put my hair through styling it 5x/wk). I am somewhat picky with my moisturisers, because I have incredibly sensitive skin, which is prone to eczema and other rashes if I use the wrong stuff, but I find a big jar of Cetaphil cream causes no issues and provides deep, long lasting moisture even in very dry climates like Colorado.
You don't have to have an extensive wardrobe to look nice/fashionable all the time. I tend to stick to a neutral palette of classic pieces (I have 2 or 3 pairs of jeans, about half a dozen sweaters and equally as many t-shirts, as well as a few skirts and shirts for work). I have as many heels as I have flip flops (2 pairs of each), and visit the cobbler whenever the heel caps or soles are wearing down, meaning I don't buy new shoes often. I previously found I was going through heels much more quickly because I walk a fair bit during my daily commute. I discovered the best solution was to buy a pair of black flats, which I can wear with my work outfit for the commute and also doubles as a comfy pair of walking shoes with a pair of jeans at the weekend. When you figure out colours and styles that work for your body and lifestyle, you can have a handful of staples and mix and match them. If you look after them properly, you shouldn't need to buy new stuff or replace things very often at all. You can also then keep an eye out for sales when you know you really like something (for example, Gap jeans fit me really well, so I buy them when they are on sale for £15), rather than being lured in by sales on a bunch of junk you'll never wear.
I would also like to reiterate Mrs MM's point about feeling best when you are healthy and in shape. I feel much happier when I am well hydrated, eating natural/healthy foods, sleeping 7-8hrs/night and exercising (which at any given time will include a mix of long, fast paced walks, heavy weight lifting and running speed intervals) a few times a week. When I am healthy from the inside out, my skin glows, my hair is shiny, and all my clothes fit and look good. I also tend to wear a much bigger smile, which is really the best possible accessory :)
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I'm lucky enough to be sparse in the body hair department, so I don't shave my legs or armpits. I only have a few underarm hairs, so I can pull them out with my fingers while in the shower. I have a bag of makeup purchased from my pre-Mustachian days, but I only bother with it if I'm going somewhere special, which isn't often. I've stopped coloring my hair, and I use clippers to keep it uniformly short and easy to care for. No curling iron, no hair spray. I do have thick eyebrows, so I pluck them with tweezers. And I have a lovely silver ear wrap that gets shown off nicely with the very short hair.
My partner doesn't wear makeup and has stopped coloring her hair at my behest. Her hair is now a gorgeous silver, streaked with black, and I love it. She is growing it out after having it very short for many years, so she occasionally visits the salon (every couple months) for shaping, which costs about $15.
She has more clothes than me, as I am embracing minimalism more. For work, I have one pair of black career slacks that I wear 4 days a week, 4 alternating solid-color t-shirts, and several sweater-jackets of different colors and cut to keep it interesting. On Fridays I wear my only pair of jeans and one of my few other more casual shirts. I have a couple summer dresses, but they're put away for the winter right now.
We buy soap, shampoo, conditioner, and two different types of skin lotion (I like Lubriderm, she likes Gold Bond) as our mainstays, with some SPF lotion for better weather when we're outside. We don't need anything more.
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Hi everyone, I love the tips in this thread! Some things I do to keep costs down:
I use bar soap only, it's unbelievable how expensive body wash is (and how much plastic waste it requires!). I buy a pack of 15 bars of soap and I'm good for almost a year.
Face wash, I've been using the oil cleansing method with vitamin a and castor oil. Clears up acne and reduces redness. Also you can make enough in one batch for a year as well. Worked fantastic for me. Reduces need for face lotion.
Shampoo and conditioner--I've tried making my own, as well as apple cider vinegar/ natural stuff and just have never been happy with the results. I buy my favorite kind in in bulk online and it cuts the cost per bottle in half. I still want to figure out how to cut back more in this area, and stop buying so many plastic bottles. I'm very against single-use plastics and it drives me crazy!
Lotion--same thing--I buy a case of 12 bottles at a time. Huge savings over buying it one-off when it runs out. I just use face lotion with SPF; no need for body lotion in my climate.
Makeup--I buy it, but use the cheap stuff. Oil cleansing reduced my need for concealer. Every day is just powder, lip gloss, and sometimes mascara.
Shaving--I've only ever used an electric razor because of skin issues. $65 bucks for a quality one and it's good for five years, at which point you can buy new blades or even a new battery to extend its life a few more years.
Clothes: This category is difficult, because I need nice clothing for work. I buy quality clothing that is classic and not "trendy." It tends to be more expensive, but I look at clothing as something that should last 10+ years, not something I'll throw out each season. I buy reused clothing whenever possible but I'm extremely petite so it is hard to find clothes that fit. When I buy new, I get it exclusively from the sale or clearance sections of websites, usually when it is also the after-season sale. A lot of places you can get items for 60% off then an additional 20% or 30%. With the economy how it's been recently, sales on clothing is non-stop. I look for a coupon code any time I even consider buying something and if I can't find one, I wait a week or two and one will pop up.
Shoes: I buy quality classic styles and get them repaired when they break (I'm amazed how many of my friends had never heard of the concept of repairing shoes, it's shocking!). For high heels you can buy new heel tips and just pull out the old ones with pliers and replace with new ones when they get worn down. For leather repairs I go to a cobbler, and most stuff is $10 or less to get fixed, much less than buying new shoes.
Haircut--I go to a nice stylist but only every 6 months to a year. With longer hairstyles it seems doable and never looks too bad.
Hair color: I go natural. I stopped dying a few years ago and it's so much nicer/ easier. It looks best on my skin tone and you never have to worry about roots showing. I personally think natural is usually the most beautiful, even when it's graying! I'm kind of looking forward to having long grey hair. I think it's so pretty.
"Pampering" i.e. manicure, pedicure, massage, etc. I just don't see the need for it. Also it creeps me out when people I don't know touch me, but I'm just weird like that...
I agree about exercise! Also, I really try to just embrace what I naturally look like (even though it is hard!) There are a few things that are worth doing to make myself feel professional and polished, but anything more than that and I wonder why I'm trying too hard to look unlike myself. Sometimes a change of attitude is needed more than the lady items.
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I'm a lady in the middle of growing out my 'stache. It's starting to look rather nice.
Here are some things I do:
Hair washing - I will admit that I haven't tried any homemade remedies, but one thing I have done is to reduce the number of times I wash my hair per week. As it turns out, I can get away with washing/conditioning only twice per week (instead of seven times!). I still shower daily, but I only give my hair a little bit of scouring with my hands on "non-wash" days. I've tried to go longer, but my hair gets very greasy after that number of days. I know of some who have completely eliminated shampoo! This saves me quite a bit on shampoo and conditioner (since I am washing 1/3 as often, the bottles last 3x longer).
Makeup - Nope. To me it's nothing but a massive burden for little to no gain. I like to lay in my warm bed for as long as humanly possible in the morning before I get up. Why would I want to get up earlier to put on stuff that if done correctly, no one will notice and if done incorrectly will make me look like a clown?? Pass. So far, I have not found it the slightest impediment to my career. I am in a science field, but more on a management track. Bringing the awesome to work has gotten me much farther than makeup.
Clothes - So, up until reading the MMM site, I would make an epic 1-2x per year trip to the high-end designer outlets that are an hour away from me to refresh my clothing for work. This trip would cost me $300-$600 and would net me 5-10 new items that I'd add to my already flexible wardrobe. Other than that, I don't shop for clothes. Since reading this website, I will instead go back to my old sporting habit of thrift store shopping. Within a 10 minute walk of my work (or 2 minute bike ride!) there are at least 3 thrift shops, two of which are known to be Totally Awesome. I'm 5'10", so I do struggle with finding pants that are long enough for me. Lucky for me, my couple years of outlet-clothes-shopping has provided me with like 4 pairs of jeans and another 4-5 "dress pants", so I just won't buy pants for a long time.
Fitness I ride my bike to work, ~8 miles round trip per day. If I can reduce my beer drinking, I think this will be quite enough to keep me reasonably fit. I sometimes supplement with yoga or a smattering of p90x workouts.
On feeling attractive We put ourselves through these beauty regimens so that we can feel just a little bit more attractive. We think that if our skin tone was only a little more even, or if our hair was just a little different, or if our asses were just a little less/more round, that we'll have achieved some attractiveness threshold. Then what? For that, I refer you to MMM's brilliant (and for me, life-changing) post on the concept of Hedonic Adaptation (http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2011/10/22/what-is-hedonic-adaptation-and-how-can-it-turn-you-into-a-sukka/).
Stop for a second and step back, or even step out of your own skin. What are you using as a metric for attractiveness? Is it something that was seen on a TV show? Read in a magazine? Implanted from when you were a young impressionable person by some combination of different factors?
Beauty comes from the inside. Instead of buying that new beauty implement, practice radiating (and I mean REALLY radiating, to the point where you think you may be radioactive) genuine (very important) smiles, friendliness, intelligence, warmth and compassion. I've found that when I practice this, I am perceived as more attractive AND I perceive myself as more attractive.
I've got more to say (about the disconnect between how you perceive yourself and how others perceive you), but alas, work beckons!
Edit:
On perception
When we think about how others perceive us (for example, whether they find us attractive), we begin with the data at hand - everything we know about ourselves. After all, what other data set is there? However, the problem with this is that we give everyone else way too much credit. By this I mean that everyone else knows far less about us than we do about ourselves. We have our entire history of insecurities that we routinely weaponize and use against ourselves by assuming that everyone else can see them too. The truth is that everyone else is so busy thinking about themselves that they could not possibly perceive all the insecurities we worry about.
To use myself as an example, I had awful, horrible, acne in high school and I have facial scars to prove it. However, when I've mentioned this to people in insecure moments or in random discussion, the overwhelming response is that no one else had even noticed. I was caught up in what turns out to be an objectively microscopic detail about myself that just could not even be perceived by anyone who wasn't me. WTF? Why have I been wasting years thinking about microdermabrasion, scar-reduction treatments and makeup? No one else can even tell the scars are there unless I've actually gone out of my way to draw attention to them.
A good amount of science has been applied to this concept. Here's a quote from a paper I found today (emphasis mine)(I admit, I have not read the entire paper).
Source: http://faculty.chicagobooth.edu/nicholas.epley/EpleyCompass.pdf
... People have so much more information about themselves than others do (Nisbett, Caputo, Legant & Marecek, 1973). People know that they are more attractive than they were yesterday, much smarter than many of their friends, or less likeable in the course of an interview than they had planned to be. Observers often know none of this. As a result of this asymmetry in information, people attend to lower-level details when thinking about themselves than when thinking
about others (Fiedler, Semin, Finkenauer, & Berkel, 1995; Semin & Fiedler, 1989). Accurately intuiting another’s impression would require leading people to construe themselves at a higher level of abstraction, focused on central and defining features of themselves rather than on low-level details or idiosyncrasies. In effect, people could become better at intuiting others’ impressions by altering how they construe themselves, metaphorically taking a big picture look at themselves that is more consistent with how they are viewed by others.
I challenge you to spend more time refining the big picture of yourself (kindness, sincerity, productivity, growth, impact) and less time worried about the mountain of superficiality imposed on you by advertising agencies, current trends, and faulty perceptions.
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I've come a long way, though. About two years ago at the ripe old age of 24 when I started to get the first inkling that my habit of spending more than I earned wasn't going to do me any favors in the long run, I began seriously tracking and recording all of my expenses. What I saw after a year of recording shocked me. The "routine upkeep" of my "rebellious" haircolors (blue, pink, fire-engine red, whatever) were costing me upwards of $2000 annually. The day I saw that, I decided to stop coloring my hair entirely. I also decided to change my hair care routine at the same time and stopped using styling products or any heat tools (including a blow dryer). I also switched to more natural, paraben-and-sulfate-free shampoos and conditioners.
AWESOME!! I think that's the key to my original article on this... know how much you are spending on beauty and be aware of what it is costing you (in time and dollars). Great story! Thanks for sharing.
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On feeling attractive We put ourselves through these beauty regimens so that we can feel just a little bit more attractive. We think that if our skin tone was only a little more even, or if our hair was just a little different, or if our asses were just a little less/more round, that we'll have achieved some attractiveness threshold. Then what? For that, I refer you to MMM's brilliant (and for me, life-changing) post on the concept of Hedonic Adaptation (http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2011/10/22/what-is-hedonic-adaptation-and-how-can-it-turn-you-into-a-sukka/).
Stop for a second and step back, or even step out of your own skin. What are you using as a metric for attractiveness? Is it something that was seen on a TV show? Read in a magazine? Implanted from when you were a young impressionable person by some combination of different factors?
Beauty comes from the inside. Instead of buying that new beauty implement, practice radiating (and I mean REALLY radiating, to the point where you think you may be radioactive) genuine (very important) smiles, friendliness, intelligence, warmth and compassion. I've found that when I practice this, I am perceived as more attractive AND I perceive myself as more attractive.
WOW!! I love this and completely agree! I'll have to come back and read it whenever I fall into the "metric of attractiveness" trap. Smiling and friendliness are the number one measures of attractiveness for me when I meet people.
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Hair: Like Scoot, I realized I was spending a fortune ($350 every 2 months) to upkeep my hair (bleach from dark brown to almost white and add stripes of pink). I loved how it looked, but decided it wasn't worth the expense, as well as my time (4 hours including driving) and the toxic chemicals being dumped on my skin.
Clothing: I try to buy either high quality new classics or basics from the thrift store. One thing I did was meet with a stylist to do some body measurements and develop a guide of styles that look good on my body shape. It helps me avoid temptation for styles that I think are totally cute but aren't very flattering - for example, skirts with lots of layers look cute on other people, but they add too much weight on me. Of course, if you have a good shopping buddy who'll give you their honest opinion, you probably don't need it. It wasn't as expensive as I anticipated - $300.
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RE: bicycle
You just blew my mind. I need to meditate on what you posted, but I'm pretty sure you just changed my life...
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Bicycle, everything you said is beautiful and true. It took my wonderful husband to make me understand those things.
I am smart, confident, and beautiful sans makeup. And like you all I think it takes is a little extra sleep and exercise. Let's not forget, not only do those women get up earlier to apply all the makeup-then they have to stay up later to take it off.
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I buy all my cosmetics at CVS and take advantage of their Extra Care Card deals. If you learn the game you can get quite a bit of free "girly" stuff.
I am much taller than average, so I learned to sew early on. There was a sewing article years ago in the Australian Stitches magazine that spawned a movement known a SWAP (sewing with a plan). Here's a description from their facebook page:
"Stage One -make 10 garments. These are: 2 pairs of pants; 2 skirts, one in a solid color, one in a print or check; 2 simple tops, one solid, one in the above print; 1 dress; 2 tops, in colors which coordinate with the solids; 1 simple jacket in a solid color."
Even if you don't sew, sticking with this wardrobe plan is very mustachian. Choose neutral solids and prints that include the solids you have chosen, and all the pieces will go well together.
If you already have simple, classic patterns that you like, you can buy all the fabric and notions for under $50 and have a fully functional stylish wardrobe that will fit in the tiniest closet.
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there's so much wisdom on this thread! i especially love the idea of focusing on taking care of ourselves and radiating joy. what could be more beautiful than that?
i run a small fashion company -- i developed an algorithm that takes a woman's measurements and creates a custom sewing pattern for her -- and part of that includes fashion blogging (http://www.weartheshift.com/blog/2012/02/06/mmmm-mustard/), which is a lot of fun.
my goals with my company are many -- i really want to change the paradigm in the fashion industry to be oriented on just-in-time production and super clever uses of technology and incredible environmental responsibility. but one of the biggest goals i have is to create alternatives outside the corporate patriarchal idea of beauty. because, honestly, real beauty comes from doing cool stuff, not genetics.
and i believe we ALL should be able to get cute clothes that fit us, even if nothing in a store is designed to our proportions (http://www.weartheshift.com/blog/2012/02/20/what-size-am-i-points-to-fashions-fatal-flaw/). right now, there is a huge quantity of shitty clothing available in the world, but very few beautifully-made, well-fitting, high quality choices, especially if you are bigger than a size 12 or so. eco-friendly plus size clothing? athleta has a (very) few things, but it's mostly a wasteland of awful polyester as far as the eye can see.
anyway ... all this is to say that i probably go a bit further with makeup and clothes than a lot of mustachians do. it's not from a place of feeling like i'm less than some standard and i need to measure up to it. for me, it really is about having fun and expressing joy with the way i look -- that's the attitude i want to model and that's the kind of community i'm trying to build with my company. so many people are so insane about their perceived flaws and imperfections! i want a fashion industry (and a world) that is about feeling cute and having a laugh and not being so obsessed with what's "wrong" with us. a fashion company that thinks you are lovely just as you are, and maybe you could use a timeless dress that fits you perfectly.
i am currently on a self-imposed buying moratorium to save up for my wedding later this year but it's not much of a hardship because i have everything i need. sometimes i do struggle with wanting to spend more than i should on pretty things -- sephora!! shoes!!! PMS!! -- but it seems to go in waves and right now i'm on a wave of stashing as much cash as i can ... and of course i'll be making my wedding dress!
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Hey madgelou, I'm working on a wedding dress too, for my future daughter in law. Well, working on the muslin this year, she is requesting multiple customizations to the pattern so I want to make sure we get it right before using the good fabric. Fun stuff!
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"Beauty comes from the inside. Instead of buying that new beauty implement, practice radiating (and I mean REALLY radiating, to the point where you think you may be radioactive)..."
Bicycle - that made me laugh out loud. Thanks for an inspiring and thoughtful post!
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this post cracks me up and i thought you all might enjoy it, too -- it's such a beautiful illustration of the absurdity / futility / hilarity of lady consumerism.
http://thehairpin.com/2011/05/my-period-takes-me-shopping
i wonder what the equivalent would be for dudes ...
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Hey madgelou, I'm working on a wedding dress too, for my future daughter in law. Well, working on the muslin this year, she is requesting multiple customizations to the pattern so I want to make sure we get it right before using the good fabric. Fun stuff!
aw man that is great! my grandma made a prom dress for me senior year of high school and it was such a fun process to do together, getting all the little details just the way we wanted them. i bet you guys are having a blast. and she'll get an heirloom out of it, too, instead of some acetate satin monstrosity from a mall bridal shop.
sewing your own is so good for so many reasons and saving money is just one of them!
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I know I am having fun, she is all stressed out from grad school right now so it's harder for her to enjoy the process. The dress she wants would cost over $3000 from the only shops that carry it, I expect to be able to sew it for under $100 (since it's not until summer of 2013, I have plenty of time to shop the fabric sales).
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"Beauty comes from the inside. Instead of buying that new beauty implement, practice radiating (and I mean REALLY radiating, to the point where you think you may be radioactive)..."
Bicycle - that made me laugh out loud. Thanks for an inspiring and thoughtful post!
agreed!
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Hi everyone!
I am not a Mustachian, but I do try to be frugal, because we (my husband and I) have been poor forever. Our families are poor, it just is the way we have been. Sometimes the situation was self-inflicted for the sake of spending a little more on food, or on internet and a computer game subscription in exchange for drastically reduced stress levels. Mostly its just from very low incomes, and not knowing any way to reduce bills.
Anyway, I think I'd like to share some things I do and questions I have.
HAIR:
Trims: I used to have classic length hair (think butt-length, like princesses). I cut it due to severe damage from simply not cutting it for seven years, and I'll regrow it with regular trims. I'm not sure whether I'll try trimming myself or not. Otherwise I only plan on a yearly trim.
Care: I hate the routine of having super-light flyaway hair right after using shampoo and conditioner, and then gradually increasing greasiness until you wash. I like my hair maybe a few days after a wash, and then it's ruined. So, I already wasn't washing much- maybe once a week. (This isn't to say I didn't shower more often than that, of course!)
I got new hair products after we moved, the new Garnier Fructis Pure Clean. I hate the way my hair was with it, but we were simply strapped for cash. I had experimented in the past with Conditioner-Only (CO) washing with some success, and then even Water-Only (WO). I decided since my hair behaved exactly like it did when WOing as it did with this new shampoo and conditioner, that I would just stop using it altogether.
I therefore spend zero money for hair care. ( I have a collection of hairthings and brushes though, but those aren't a recurring cost.)
Hair Removal: I currently shave, usually with a Venus razor. I like the one with a very wide area before the blades, but I hate the slime of a new blade head- the lubrication drives me crazy. I'm afraid the razor will slip and cut me (this fear is not without a foundation- I usually only cut myself with new blades!) One razor head lasts me about 3 or 4 months. Currently I'm using a razor my husband had, because I didn't feel like arguing when I asked for new blades.
I pluck between my eyebrows with tweezers (special tweezers that live in my purse and cannot be used by my husband for toenail surgery! He gets bad ingrown nails on his big toes)
Dyeing: Please don't! I don't, but I did once to get past a hateful length. I regretted it afterwards- it wasn't me. I LOVE both my favorite aunt's and my mother-in-law's graying heads. Mom-in-law dyes and I seriously wish she wouldn't, she looks so beautiful with it. I can't wait til I go gray.
MAKE-UP: None. I own a cover-up that I need to get rid of. My twin sister wears make-up and I always think about how she's silly for using it, because she is so pretty. We're not identical, but I think I ought to have similar looks, and they don't require improvement! I think most women are ugly with caked faces.
NAILS: Do it yourself, or have parties with female friends and manicure eachother's! Then you can share products and therefor keep less, or none, and usually someone is very talented at it. So you'd save money and get social time. I file and trim my own, or let them grow, as I feel like. Sometimes they are nice and other times I don't feel like caring. /shrug. I have a $1 collection of Bon-Bon nailpolish for when I feel girly. That's maybe twice a year, heehee.
MENSTRUATION: Yes, I said it. I absolutely MUST share the greatest invention ever, which is a menstrual cup. It is exactly what it sounds like, a flexible cup that goes inside you similar to a tampon and collects your fluids instead of absorbing them. I cannot believe I ever used anything else, and had never heard of them. I don't have to think about my period ALL DAY LONG! I empty the thing in the morning in the privacy of my own home and at night before bed. It doesn't leak or irritate (once I trimmed the stem) , or get stuck, or dry me out, or worry me with toxic shock. I get this wonderful smug sensation every time I see the feminine product aisle in the grocery store now. I don't have to carry around tons of things in my purse! I'm free! I will gladly sing the praises of this thing to any who will listen, can you tell?? It is supposed to last 10 years, and costs $35 dollars plus $2 for shipping. How much do you pay for pads or tampons compounded over ten years? Mine is personally The Keeper Mooncup (clear silicone version versus brown latex original), but you can just google search for "menstrual cup" and find other companies outside the US.
Question- I'd like to know specific details about epilators and using them. Models would be good, what you like or don't like, what you've learned. I tried tweezing my bikini area once and hated it. But an epilator would be even MORE frugal than 3 razor blade heads a year.
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Hello Lady Staches! I'm so happy I found this thread, especially as I always feel the pressure to spend money to look good, especially
Makeup: I only use face powder and lip balm, and only the drugstore brands. I've always wanted to try eyeliner and mascara, but never bought myself any because I considered it a waste of money. So I asked my boyfriend to get me these things for my birthday! I gave him a choice between two affordable brands, though, one step up from drugstore. It is my birthday. ;)
Hair: I get a haircut about twice a year, costs about 12 USD per haircut. I also decided to stop coloring my hair, so that's another 12-15 USD saved. I don't shave my legs, and use a tweezer for my brows.
Skin: I fortunately don't have any major issues with my skin. I drink lots of water and stay out of the sun. On the rare occasions that I do want to have something checked out, I ask my uncle, who is a dermatologist and gives me free skincare product samples whenever I visit :D
Clothes: Clothes are my biggest expense. I used to weigh 155 pounds so it was difficult for me to find cheap clothes that fit well and looked presentable enough for my office job. Since then, though, I've gone down to 132 pounds, which has made it a lot easier to find sale and bazaar items that fit nicely. Still, I know I can do better. I know I can find nice outfits for even lower prices if I only got down to the 125 pound range. It's my primary motivation to lose weight: wearing things I was never ever able to wear before comfortably.
I totally agree that the most important thing a girl can do to look good is to exercise regularly and eat healthy. Any type of clothing, even if it is kind of worn and dated, just looks better on a fit body. So the best type of clothes to invest in are high-quality exercise clothes and shoes. I splurged on a brand new pair of New Balance running shoes last month. And by splurge, I mean I bought them on sale for ~56 USD. :D
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wouldn't call myself advanced, but:
i get my hair cut very rarely. it's usually more expensive than i'd like, so i think next time i may ask my boyfriend to cut it. i would really like to go the no 'poo route. right now i'm just waiting out my economy shampoo/conditioner to run out. i used to dye my hair (i started a young age) but i stopped around 4 years ago. i started because i have a ton of gray hair for being young (now i'm in my twenties, but i started graying in my teens). but i really prefer the natural look now anyway.
i wax myself, which is really not very expensive. the wax heating machine cost about 20$ several years ago and is still going strong. each tub of individual wax costs around 10$ and lasts me about 6 months (due to years and years of waxing, i have very little hair-- and i'm middle eastern!). you can make your own wax with sugar, lemon juice, and honey.
i don't wear makeup unless i'm going to an interview or meeting a client, which is when i wear a little bit of eyeliner. my eyeliner has lasted me a good 6 years now.
i do use a soft spf on my skin every day. i spend about 30$ every 8 months for a nice spf moisturizer, but a little goes a long way (and i always use samples if i can get my hands on them).
clothes are more difficult. i've always had a hard time with the idea of getting second-hand clothing, so when i do shop, it's usually at the mall. but i honestly can't recall the last time i bought an article of clothing. i'm just not a shopper.
my favorite moneysaver of all time is my menstrual cup and reusable pads. i know i sound psychotic for saying this, but they are such a pleasure to use!! i much prefer them to disposable feminine products for several reasons. on top of my preference for them, they're cheaper than disposables.
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Awesome to see so many lady 'staches!!
Well I'm like a lot of you, I think I do I pretty good job of keeping costs down.
Makeup- rarely wear it (like twice a year) and when I do its just a little mascara and lip gloss. So the stuff I have has lasted YEARS!
Hair - I have long (below shoulders) natural brown hair. I get a cut maybe once a year. Nothing fancy with my hair! As for body hair, I tweeze my eyebrows on my own. I used a venus razor with disposable heads. I find I have no problem using the same razor head for quite awhile so I bought a 12 pack of replacement heads about 6 years ago and I still have a bunch left.
Clothes - I have a pretty basic wardrobe. Enough to mix and match, so I rarely buy clothes. One thing I should do more of is check thrift stores if I absolutely need something. But I mostly wait until the holidays or birthday when people ask what I want and ask for clothes or gift certificates for shopping. Then I use that instead of my own money!
Onto the period thing....this is the second time I've heard of the menstrual cup. I haven't quite been able to make that leap yet. But I've heard awesome things about them. And I know it would cut down on costs of buying tampons and pads.
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Self-esteem is big part of not being tempted to spend on expensive things. I find that these things have contributed the most to accepting myself:
1. aging - it just happens and you learn to let go of some insecurities - plus you get some wrinkles and grey hair and acceptance as part of the package
2. personal growth - i did a program called choices and it was wonderful - expensive but worth every penny
3. a partner who loves you for who you are and accepts you fully - amazing what this can do :)
So, that said, I enjoy some luxury lady things:
1. Bodyshop bodywash- bar soap makes me itch. I buy it when there is a great sale (ie. buy one get one free and then a third with the coupon on the back of the receipt) and I buy a lot of it. I have enough for two years in the cupboard. I dislike shopping and it keeps.
2. Hair - I used to go to a very upscale hairdress - yes, $200 a cut!! I have curly hair and she was the local expert. She was good but the new hairdresser I have is just as good and is $40. I don't need cutting very often because curly hair hides all :) I buy Bodyshop ginger shampoo (on sale and stocked up - great for dry hair) and expensive conditioner in big bottles. The conditioner lasts a long time because I only wash my hair 2-3 times a week because it helps with the dryness. I dye my hair myself at home - easy and fast.
3. Make-up - I use mascara and lipstick and not much else. I don't mind spending money on these.
4. Hair removal - I did laser hair removal about five years ago. Worked well on my underarms and somewhat on the bikini line. I shave my legs. The laser hair removal was really expensive. I wish there was a permanent, affordable at-home DIY hair removal system. If anyone knows of one please let me know!
5. Clothes - biannual shopping trips to brand name discount stores and thrift stores. Irregular emergency shopping for, for example, a wedding. I know what I like and stick to the same styles these days - makes it fast.
6. Manicure/Pedicure - I don't like them. I have been given several as gifts and find them a chore. I just cut my nails myself.
7. Skin care - I use vitamin E oil. Works wonders for dry skin and is non-irritating. I put it on before bed and in the morning my skin looks great. Cheap and effective and pure ingredients.
8. Exercise - ah, well, I walk a couple of times a day with the dog but boy I could use some inspiration here... or a personal trainer :)
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For those wanting to explore mustachian options for birth control/ menstrual flow, check out this post:
http://4hutches.blogspot.ca/2012/07/mrs-hutchs-home-economics-using-iuds-as.html
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I'll add my vote to menstrual cups. They're totally amazing.
However, I'll admit that I love clothing. I think having beautiful, well-made clothing is like owning a small work of wearable art... although certainly most clothing isn't well-made.
I'm a fiend for vintage clothing, and I work in an office environment where that look is welcome. I would say 80% of what I wear is secondhand, offset with a few basics (nice jeans, a modern pencil skirt, a blazer, etc.). I'm also a fiend for thrifting, so I've found a way to pay for that 80% of my wardrobe. I go to cheap thrift stores, dig for a few hours to find fashionable items, and bring pieces to consignment stores. An afternoon's digging--which, again, I honestly enjoy--usually yields about $100 of credit for $5-$15 of clothing. There are lots of nice consignment places around me, and so I always have a steady supply of stylish, new-to-me clothes.
I used to be really sensitive about my skin, although I know it's objectively fine. Over the years, I've transitioned from foundation, powder, and concealer to just powder 1/2 the time and nude 1/2 the time. Surprise, surprise, no one has run screaming away from me on those no-powder days. Besides powder, I wear eyeliner 90% of the time. I'm trying to transition out of that as well, but I really like how I look with eyeliner!
ws
Since my makeup routine is relatively simple, I've also noticed that when I do something extra--wear lipstick, for example--it's an occasion. I like that. It's like reverse hedonic adaptation.
I don't cut my hair. When the split ends pile up, I just grab a chunk and snip. People compliment me on my hair all the time. I'm also excited to turn grey. Going silvery is going to be amazing.
My mom rubs cut lemons on her legs and swears it makes the hair grow back finer, but when I just googled it, I see a lot of websites recommending it as a growth aid, so YMMV.
This is kind of embarrassing, but I've definitely been wistful peering into other people's medicine cabinets and seeing lots of fancy fancy products. I buy Cetaphil in bulk from Costco, and it doesn't feel very chic to have this enormous tub sitting out. So, now I spoon it into a small brown amber glass jar with a screwtop lid. It feels more luxurious. I think I may start mixing a few drops of essential oils or some rosewater into it, to amp it up further.
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So much great advice here. I'm not very girly, and my recommendation was going to be on the diet and exercise front. I'm similar to Mrs. MM in that I rarely wear makeup, so what I have lasts a very long time.
I did just have to spend money this year on mat clothing and now the "crap nothing fits because I just had a baby.". I do NOT enjoy shopping, so digging through thrift stores when I'm not sleeping is not my idea of fun.
I do,shave though, and also wax right before a vacation in a warm place.
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Another vote for menstrual cups, with an added plug for reusable pads. It's really nice to ditch the plastics and disposables - this was the thing that cut all ties with CVS.
I too like wearing well made, well-fitting clothing. As a petite 28F, that doesn't come cheap - but I buy only a few quality pieces so they last forever. Unfortunately it isn't very Mustachian these days as I build a small clothing stache . . but another year of replacing worn out clothing and I should be good to go for a long time. I've worn enough crappy clothing in my life. It's the one materialistic part of my life where I'm okay spending money. I don't like shopping though, so it comes in spurts.
My only make up is concealer and mascara. I can go without but prefer wearing something to feel put together.
I've transitioned away from pretty much all other body products - just shampoo, conditioner (SLS free, willing to pay for it), and soap. I'm on my last disposable razor cartridge and will be replacing that with a safety razor when it's done. I make my own deodorant and use coconut or jojoba oil if my skin is dry.
Exercise and sunscreen should keep me looking young for a while yet.
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I have short, slightly punky hair, and I get haircuts every 2 months or sooner. That's the main self-maintenance thing that costs me money.
I wash my face with water and a washcloth. My man and I use the same soap (I dig Dr. Bronner's).
I use sugar wax, but most of the time I forget to do it because I'm too busy. I'm thinking of trying to make my own -- I know you can do that. The internet will tell me how.
My skin is a bit dry, so any kind of face soap would just make it more dry. I do have a fancy face lotion, but I don't have to use very much at a time. I'm thinking of replacing this with something that contains sunblock, but those usually make my eyes sting.
I don't wear makeup to work: my skin doesn't need foundation and my eyelashes are dark enough not to need mascara. Eyeshadow that's subtle enough for daytime basically looks like it's not there, and lipstick wears off within an hour. Seems like it would be a waste of time. I'm athletic and I usually get enough sleep, so I look pretty nice.
I spend a lot on clothes still -- I'm working on tweaking my professional wardrobe and collecting the right cold-weather bike gear. Also I married an Indian guy (I'm not), so I'm like 10 years behind all the other ladies on building a wardrobe of Indian clothes for all the family functions.
The thing that makes the biggest difference in how I look is that I'm happy. I'm the happiest person in my office, for sure. I don't have stress. I go around smiling all the time. People don't notice I don't wear makeup because they're too shocked that I'm in a good mood.
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This thread has been amazingly inspirational. I used to wear a lot of makeup to make myself look older. That is right older! I worked in an office where most people were my parents' age.
I have cut way back....instead of foundation, powder, blush, eyeshadow, eye liner, lipstick, lip liner and all the matching primers, I have cut it to BB Cream and mascara. So much easier in the morning and less maintainance during the day.
It has helped me appreciate my youth and become more confident in my skills at work.
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I don't wear make-up, but I wear SPF15+ moisturiser/sunscreen all year round (and ramp up to 30+ when it's not winter & I don't just get incidental sunshine during my day).
I made a decision this year to only buy 2nd hand clothes. This is working out well, except I'm buying clothes for Prague winter brand new. (You really can't find those 2nd hand in northern Australia!) I also only own 3 pairs of shoes. Less choices, less decisions. A guy at uni the other day exclaimed to me, "You wear that shirt every day!!". (This is a lie, I wear it every 3 days.) Which goes to show I don't really care if I wear the same clothes over and over again.
I use shampoo, conditioner, facewash, and deodorant every day. I also dye my hair blonde every 6 months, which costs about $100 each time.
I like to think I'm more maintainable than other 20-something women that I go to uni with :)
Oh, and I don't bother to ever get my period, so that's a whole lot of stuff that I have to never buy. Yay.
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Hair: I recently cut my hair very short and I love it! Looks good all the time without having to hassle with it. It does require a cut every 6 weeks for maintenance but I get it cut for $9 at a cosmetology school (I'm very surprised with how good they are). I don't need to buy any shampoo, conditioner, or products. I just wash it with water and with baking soda about once a week.
Clothes: I love clothing swaps! Whatever I can't get through those I get at thrift stores. I recently discovered the goodwill outlet which is even cheaper! They charge for clothes by the pound and usually pay only 25-50 cents per item!
Makeup: I have dark circles under my eyes (genetic) so I'll wear foundation just to cover that. I like a little mascara and eye liner now and then but it's too much of a hassle to do it daily. I only own one color of nail polish at a time and paint my toes that color until it runs out or dries out.
Periods: I bought reusable pads from luna pads about a year and I'm sooo glad I did. They're way more comfortable, they save money, and they're greener! I've never used the Divacup but I've heard great things about it.
Exercise: I play roller derby which keeps me in great shape. It also gives me confidence, friends, and an amazing support system! It is an expensive sport but it's my splurge. I cross train by running outside or doing core exercises in my living room.
Everything Else: I use the oil cleansing method for my face. It moisturizes so I no longer have to buy face lotion. I use liquid soap when it's on sale at Bath and Body works for $1-2. I make my own deodorant by mixing corn starch and baking soda together. The baking soda acts as a deodorant and the corn starch acts as a anti-antiperspirant.
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I recently started using a salt crystal deodorant. It was $2.50 (Sunflower Market) and from what I have read will probably last years. I am really impressed how well it works. I work 12 hour shifts, sometimes doing heavy physical work, and have never noticed an issue.
I'm a redhead, and we tend not to gray, as much as fade. I use henna about every 2 months to add brightness and a little red. It's so close to my natural color you can't see roots, and it looks super natural b/c it matches my eyebrows/complexion. It's messy - like covering your head in mud, but it is actually good for your hair. I buy a $6 jar of powder and it lasts about 4 uses. It comes in other colors, too, if red is not your thing.
I use Covergirl Outlast lipstick. It doesn't smear, and lasts about 16 hours on me. Around $8, and I probably go through 3 a year, and I wear it every day. Sometimes I use a $0.50 eyebrow pencil. I probably buy it every 2 years. That is my 30 second make-up routine. (And sunscreen when I remember.)
I primarily buy my clothes at thrift stores, occasionally from Walmart, and Ross. I have a $13 Coach purse from a thrift store, and a $20 one from Craigslist.
I buy 2 pairs of Brooks shoes every year. I work on my feet (nursing) and I love them. They are by far the most comfortable for my feet. They are about $100 a pair.
Heidi
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Things I struggle with $ wise: Hair removal. I have hair EVERYWHERE.
Work Clothes. Everyone here dresses business business business with nice makeup and accessories. I look horrible in comparison and I can't bring myself to spend money on nicer items.
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I used to spend $75 for a haircut + tip....then found out that my friend's daughter was a hairdresser. She fixed an awful mess that the expensive hairdresser made. Now I go to the barbershop where she works to get my haircuts. The price went up recently to $16...which I am happy to pay! She does a great job and I don't have to go very often.
Other than mascara or lipbalm, I haven't bought any makeup in years. When I work I just wear lip balm.....my hair is in a hat at work and I also have a face mask on most of the time. This is because it's in an operating room, so no one sees my face anyway.
I just use a powder with SPF otherwise and some mascara and gloss if I'm going "out" to dinner or some social function.
I am terrible about clothes shopping. If not for clothing swaps with friends I would not have anything to wear. In fact, most of the stuff that was originally mine either doesn't fit anymore or has a bunch of holes in it! This is one area where I could actually increase my budget. Everyone I know thinks I need to spend a little more time/attention in this area.
One caveat.....I love pedicures! French and only during sandal season. I don't paint my fingernails though, just toes.
I am trying to do better in the fitness realm. I have found that when I am slender an toned it makes a HUGE difference in the way I feel about myself. That is one reason I don't have many clothes.....I haven't "earned" them with discipline. I have never told anyone that before. I've never known what made me feel that way, but I'm trying to use that as an incentive to be healthier! It also forces me to be more creative with the items I already have.
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Most of my "primping" is to make myself feel readied and able to rock the day. For me, the shaving, makeup, etc. is like making my bed and taking a shower...it makes me feel like I care for myself and that I'm ready to go out and face the world!
That said, I'm very cheap. IUD and DivaCup are very low-cost solutions to the delightful business of being female. I buy the cheapest shampoo and conditioner since I don't have fussy hair, and half the time I shower at work anyway, where the products are provided. I use razors for a LONG time - the only thing that really damages them is water left on the blade, so living in a dry climate helps (other climates can dip a razor in some alcohol to dry faster).
I use drugstore makeup - powder foundation, cheap ass blush, and eyeliner when I'm feeling sassy. I grew up frugal and I'm still broke as balls, so I almost never buy anything expensive. All my clothes are secondhand sans underwear and socks, but that sucks because I'm tall and thin and hard to fit. I always look like I'm wearing my little sister's clothing.
We have bar soap, but it scuzzes up the tub and shower and I'm freaking sick of having to scrub it off. Shower spray applied daily does not seem to help. Any good ideas?
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I love having an IUD - my "periods" are now a bit of spotting a couple days a month, and some women stop having periods altogether. Much easier and more effective than taking a pill every day.
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mushroom, is that the IUS/ hormonal IUD rather than the copper IUD? I'm thinking about getting one but am a little apprehensive about the fitting and the side effects.
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Mushroom, I hear you! Periods were hell before and now I barely notice them.
Shandi76, the copper IUD generally makes for worse, heavier periods. I have the hormonal one and recommend it to all. Many of my friends have gotten them with no issues. One did have her ute spit it back out though.
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Shandi76, the copper IUD generally makes for worse, heavier periods.
That depends entirely on the woman and your personal hormone levels. I have the copper IUD and my periods are shorter than they once were but just as heavy. Combined with the Diva Cup though I can't tell the difference. Even if it was a bit heavier the lack of hormones is worth it. Not to mention that Paraguard lasts twice as long as the Mirena.
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shandi76 - I have the hormonal IUD (Mirena). The fitting isn't terribly pleasant, but honestly, I didn't find it a big deal at all when I kept it in perspective that this was a couple minutes of discomfort so that I wouldn't have to worry about birth control for years. I had some cramping for the first couple of weeks, but after that, I've had no idea that it's there and no problems with it or side effects at all.
My two closest friends also have IUDs and are really happy with them. Of course the experience will depend on the individual, but my sense is that many women have a good experience with it.
And so I don't feel like I've completely hijacked this thread:
bicycle - loved your post like so many women here. I was amazed at all the women in my residency program who would be working 80 hours a week coming into the hospital with makeup and perfect hair at 6 a.m. (probably waking up at 4:30 a.m. to do this). I am not a makeup girl (only for special occasions) and would much prefer sleeping a little extra to try to catch up on the massive sleep deprivation debt I built up over the years. I never quite fit in, and I love your comment about radiating beautiful emotions.
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Question- I'd like to know specific details about epilators and using them. Models would be good, what you like or don't like, what you've learned.
I apologize for digging up an old question, but I'm also interested in some answers to this question.
I've never heard of epilators before this thread, but I'm intrigued and would like to try it. Problem is.. I looked at Amazon and found most of the popular ones range in price from around $50 to $120! Ouch. That's not something I can just pick up without a lot of thought. I'd hate to pick one out, find out it doesn't work well on me, and be out that much money. Looking over reviews for different models, it just seems that there's always someone who says it works great, and someone else who says it doesn't work on her. I just don't know whether there's different kinds of features that work better with different kinds of skin/hair, etc., and what feature(s) are must haves, nice to have, or useless, from an experienced user's point of view. Currently I wax and tweeze, so I'm thinking that the pain issue should be manageable (as compared to someone who doesn't usually pull out hairs). Also, how long does it take to use one of these? One of my problems is I can't stay looking down, or twisting my neck for long, lest I aggravate my back/neck issues.
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Anyone have recommendations on cheap(er) non-chemical sunscreen? I have bad skin allergies and I've been spending about $120/year on daily face suncreen that is just zinc/titanium and doesn't look like chalk.
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However, I'll admit that I love clothing. I think having beautiful, well-made clothing is like owning a small work of wearable art... although certainly most clothing isn't well-made.
This is kind of embarrassing, but I've definitely been wistful peering into other people's medicine cabinets and seeing lots of fancy fancy products. I buy Cetaphil in bulk from Costco, and it doesn't feel very chic to have this enormous tub sitting out. So, now I spoon it into a small brown amber glass jar with a screwtop lid. It feels more luxurious. I think I may start mixing a few drops of essential oils or some rosewater into it, to amp it up further.
I love clothing too but it's so depressing to see all the junk that's out there, I've more or less given up. I also get medicine-cabinet envy and probably it's more about the containers than the products. It's a great idea just to decant cheapo-bulk products into fancy jars, got to try it tonight!
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Anyone have recommendations on cheap(er) non-chemical sunscreen? I have bad skin allergies and I've been spending about $120/year on daily face suncreen that is just zinc/titanium and doesn't look like chalk.
Wear more protective clothing and avoid direct sun exposure from 12-2? That's probably your best option, but not the one you probably wanted to hear. Other things I've heard thrown around are coconut oil (15spf naturally) or making your own sunscreen from various ingredients.
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smalllife--I've never heard about coconut oil or making my own. It's mostly facial sunscreen (I work on a high floor next to a large, old window) that I find myself in need of on a daily basis. I'm going to look into both options.
On the note of shoes...as a New Yorker who walks everywhere and I KILL shoes. I finally figured out the shoe thing for myself. I've bought a pair of high quality (usually $80ish) brown leather shoes in every basic style over the past several years. I have knee high boots (those were pricier but they are 4 yrs old and will likely give me 20 more, tho they will require resoling); lace-up, ankle-high wintery boots; loafers; lowish heels with a t-strap; and sandals. This simplifies my wardrobe, and forces me to make frankly more interesting ensembles with what I own. And now I don't even need to browse shoe stores.
Also, I've switched to minimalist running shoes, which aren't for everyone but can last a lot longer than padded shoes.
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This may be stupid, but could you see about putting a UV film on the window at your work? It'd pay for itself compared to sunscreen pretty quickly.
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Regarding epilators: I bought a Philips mid-range model two years ago and it gets constant use, except it's a big schlep to plug in and clean up. I wish I'd ponied up for a more expensive waterproof one to use in-shower.
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Shandi76, the copper IUD generally makes for worse, heavier periods.
That depends entirely on the woman and your personal hormone levels. I have the copper IUD and my periods are shorter than they once were but just as heavy. Combined with the Diva Cup though I can't tell the difference. Even if it was a bit heavier the lack of hormones is worth it. Not to mention that Paraguard lasts twice as long as the Mirena.
This seems to be a catch-all thread for "lady 'staches" so I hope I'm not thread-jacking too much.
I don't know how many of you have HSA's but keep in mind with an IUD that you'll be paying all the cost of the IUD and insertion because neither Paragard nor Mirena is generic yet. I had the Mirena inserted last year and paid about $1300 between the IUD and the insertion, from my HSA. Mind you this was an effort to be cost-effective as the breakdown per year was ~$260/yr. However, the hormone in the Mirena drove me crazy and I do mean to the edge of reason and beyond! After 7 months I had that sucker yanked out costing me over $1300 for one year of contraception. :(
I'm eyeing the Paragard now as new data shows it may be effective for up to 12 years. At the cost of another ~$1300 that would breakdown to ~$108/yr. By the time I need a new one there is a good possibility a cheaper or generic IUD will be on the market and the next one would cost even less.
To round things out I just started using the DivaCup and I have to give kudos to this forum for finally pushing me to buy one. I love it!
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I don't know how many of you have HSA's but keep in mind with an IUD that you'll be paying all the cost of the IUD and insertion because neither Paragard nor Mirena is generic yet. I had the Mirena inserted last year and paid about $1300 between the IUD and the insertion, from my HSA. Mind you this was an effort to be cost-effective as the breakdown per year was ~$260/yr. However, the hormone in the Mirena drove me crazy and I do mean to the edge of reason and beyond! After 7 months I had that sucker yanked out costing me over $1300 for one year of contraception. :(
I'm eyeing the Paragard now as new data shows it may be effective for up to 12 years. At the cost of another ~$1300 that would breakdown to ~$108/yr. By the time I need a new one there is a good possibility a cheaper or generic IUD will be on the market and the next one would cost even less.
Both Mirena and Paraguard are FDA approved methods of birth control. As such they require no co-pay or additional payments because of the new health care laws. Mine was completely free to insert and I got my co-pay refunded by my insurance company.
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Is that with all healthcare plans? I thought it only mandated that they provide coverage for it not provide it at no cost to the individual.
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Is that with all healthcare plans? I thought it only mandated that they provide coverage for it not provide it at no cost to the individual.
Birth control is now classified as preventative care, which requires no additional out of pocket costs to the consumer. Whether or not you have a co-pay may be up to the specific plan but you shouldn't have to pay the additional billing costs above and beyond that. Coverage is mandated, but the crucial part of that coverage is that it is classified as preventative care. It is my understanding that birth control (FDA approved) can be obtained without all of the additional fees and out of pocket costs associated with specialty care.
Even better is that sterilization is an FDA approved method of birth control :-)
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Sterilization is approved as BC? That is awesome. Because there are no mini money mustaches in my future, and so I am very glad to hear that the procedure will be more affordable.
I have had great experiences with the Mirena IUD. I typically do poorly with hormonal BC - it drives me crazy! I suspect I have low levels of the female hormones to start with. Mirena has the lowest amount of hormones available, something approaching 1/7th of the lowest-dose pill. It is also more effective at preventing pregnancy than the copper IUD, which is what decided me. Paraguard does last 10 years and Mirena only 5, but I did not find the insertion all that bad (I used to have cramps that would take me out of work for two days a month, vomiting in pain, so maybe I'm not the best reference). Four of my friends have gotten IUDs on my recommendation and one didn't have a good experience, i.e. her uterus spat it back out. But up until then, she loved it.
The first month was a little rough with the hormones until my body adjusted. It was like PMS for a month - teary, edgy, hormones. But it went away, and I love not thinking about BC and not having horrendous periods. In fact, I didn't even have one for years, and now I barely notice them.
Them's m'two cents, YMMV.
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I'm about to get the Mirena IUD! :D I'm hoping it will mean less migraines... typically I get anywhere between 2-5 every month 'round about that time. Plus I'm looking forward to not having to take pills! I take mine every day but it's such a habit that I don't always remember taking it and then I freak out until I can get back home to check.
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Lots of great advice and information about IUDs thanks :-) I'm in the UK so we don't have to pay for contraception which means cost isn't a factor. I used to get headaches on the combined pill so not sure I want another hormonal method of contraception. Sterilization (preferably for my partner) sounds great but it is hard to get 2 Doctors to agree you can have the procedure when you are mid 30s and childless.
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smalllife--I've never heard about coconut oil or making my own. It's mostly facial sunscreen (I work on a high floor next to a large, old window) that I find myself in need of on a daily basis. I'm going to look into both options.
On the note of shoes...as a New Yorker who walks everywhere and I KILL shoes. I finally figured out the shoe thing for myself. I've bought a pair of high quality (usually $80ish) brown leather shoes in every basic style over the past several years. I have knee high boots (those were pricier but they are 4 yrs old and will likely give me 20 more, tho they will require resoling); lace-up, ankle-high wintery boots; loafers; lowish heels with a t-strap; and sandals. This simplifies my wardrobe, and forces me to make frankly more interesting ensembles with what I own. And now I don't even need to browse shoe stores.
Also, I've switched to minimalist running shoes, which aren't for everyone but can last a lot longer than padded shoes.
I will agree about the coconut oil. I'm very fair skinned (can burn in 15 minutes or less) but coconut oil works well for me. I put it on in the AM instead of regular sunscreen and facial lotion. No burns yet and I've been using it for a little over a year now.
You mention that you have found boots that work well (last long & stand up to lots of walking). Would you mind sharing? I'm looking to replace a pair of boots I have (not at all quality) and I want to make sure to buy a pair that will last for years without breaking the bank.
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Anyone have recommendations on cheap(er) non-chemical sunscreen? I have bad skin allergies and I've been spending about $120/year on daily face suncreen that is just zinc/titanium and doesn't look like chalk.
Slip, slop, slap!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slip-Slop-Slap (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slip-Slop-Slap)
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I've never seen that Slip-Slap-Slop! I like it, a bit like Stop Drop and Roll.
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Just found this thread! Wish there was a section for us minority Lady Staches. I'm going to get my Mirena IUD "re-upped" this year and it was the best $30 I spent back in 2008. Here's to another 5 years of a barren womb!
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Lately I've spent less time and money on clothes/makeup and more getting outside, eating healthy food, developing healthy habits. I figure if I look fairly healthy and fit, then I'll look good even in old clothes with minimal makeup. Not that I'm ever going to be a model that can put on a sack and look great, but I can at least look decent in a plain tee and jeans. Being healthy is a way of taking care of myself AND my appearance that's relatively cheap.
This this this this this this this!!!! I've had several people tell me I'm looking really good recently and I'm feeling good. It's all due to healthy eating of REAL foods. No more processed crap and I cut WAY back on sugar. No snacking, I'm making all our food from scratch. Also getting outside. That glow is coming from within! Better than any new clothes item.
Also a scarf makes a wonderful fashion addition to almost any outfit.
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Just read the whole thread - what a delightful place to find!
For clothing I have made a pledge to not buy anything new for 2013 but to use what I have in my closet. I also decided to donate anything that makes me feel like a schlub. I have definitely pared down my wardrobe but have never been happier for it. The concept of a 'capsule wardrobe' isn't new but it's such a relief and release!
Makeup is minimal - I have nice palettes and they'll last me for years, same with lipsticks (which get worn rarely). The thing I can't go without is mascara because my eyelashes are blonde. I look like I don't have any and you can barely see my eyes without mascara. I discovered 'tubing' mascara though and I love it. It comes off with simple soap and water, no more raccoon eyes and no more makeup remover.
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I second all the advice above. A few tips, some of which were mentioned have really helped me.
Whenever I start to feel down about my appearance I always remind myself that eating healthy/exercising/having confidence are WAY more noticeable than lipstick or a new outfit.
I’ve gone without shampoo on and off for years. Washing your hair with water everyday makes an enormous difference. Baby powder to take care of greasy hair goes a long way. Ultimately I found that for me personally it was just as much effort not washing my hair with shampoo as doing so, so I’ve started again. However, even splashing out and buying “decent” shampoo seems to go a long way after doing all of this.
I used to get highlights religiously. Once I tallied up the expense, I figured just because my hair looks a little (or possibly much) better with highlights, it’s simply not worth the expense. Dishwater blonde hair is probably one of the drabbest colors, but after letting it go (and yes it was a difficult transition) I found my hair lightened up naturally and better complemented my skin tone. Does it look great? Probably not, but I figure if I’m looking to attract a man with my highlights then I’ll have greater issues down the road.
I’m not afraid to cut my own hair, or go to lemon tree, but I’m finding now that “good” haircuts really make a difference in the long run. Groupons are a dime a dozen for fancy salons. That and living social always has deals, and the businesses are generally eager to hook you into becoming a regular customer, so they do an extra fab job.
Skin- I use oil-washing method, same as others have mentioned. Can’t speak highly enough about it. I have literally seen wrinkles disappear from my face, and it’s to the point that I look worse with foundation. I use olive oil, castor oil or grape seed oil- Google for recipes or just try things out. I no longer need face wash, moisturizer, acne medication, and aging cream…
Makeup-over the past several years I paired down the makeup I wore to work. It got to the point that my one go-to was mascara. Mascara was the one thing I couldn’t go out in public without. Out of curiosity I just stopped for a couple days to see what would happen. The world did not collapse. In fact it was quite liberating. And contrary to my previous assumptions, men seem to find this attractive.
Full disclosure- I do wear make up when I go out, but eyeshadow seems to last forever, and I don’t bother with foundation or lipstick.
Nails- Nail teks clear nail polish makes a world of a difference in the health of your nails. I literally went from biting them to the quick to having nice ones. It’s kind of expensive, but well worth the cost. About 10$ at the drug store for a tiny bottle. I used to get mani- pedis, but I found if I mimic their style and wipe off all the excess nail polish from the brush at the edge of the bottle, and give myself the clear coat first and last, it looks just as good, if not better. The trick is to not be afraid to get color nail polish on your skins because it washes off with soap.
Reflecting back, I don’t know how I spend 100$ a month at the drug store on ‘necessities’, which at the time I thought I was on austerity. God only knows how much when I was getting manicure, highlights and facials, and ironically I look far better now.
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Oh, and in regards to lingerie, I figure that if he doesn’t care for the selection I already have, he is welcome to pick out what he wants and spend his money on it ☺
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I don't wear make-up. (Would you eat whatever make-up product you are putting on your skin? Because your skin is soaking it into your body). I also make all of my own cleaning products, which just means body wash, shampoo, and face cleaner. Since becoming Mustachian, I have learned to cut my own hair as well.
At the risk of being overly blunt, sometimes I just don't get the need to buy expensive things to cover up what I actually look like. My self-worth is not defined by how much make-up I wear, how my eyebrows are shaped, or whether my boss wants to sleep with me. I look how I look and I expect everyone to just get over it. So far, despite having a job where appearances can matter, it is working just fine.
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Penny Just a thank you and "amen" to the highlights thing. I was blond for about 10 years - just switched to dark blond natural last year. No I don't "stand out" like I used to, but my hair is in better shape from not being fried on bleach, and besides, who the heck am I trying to stand out for at age 47 married with three kids ...???
Intrigued by the discussion on oil cleansing - but I have to go translate all the oil names in French and figure this out.
I am hoping that with more mustachian eating and biking (and less stress around mone) that my skin will look better and I can go with a lot less make-up...
Love this thread too.
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I got a Paragard (copper IUD) placed two months ago... Oof. I love it when I'm not on my cycle, but my period has gone from three days with minimal spotting before/after to 9-11 days with five days of spotting between. And very mild cramps to waking-me-up-at-night, taking 2,400-mg-of-ibuprofen-every-day bad cramps. :(
I know the first six months are supposed to be rough, so I'm going to ride it out. Just wanted to vent here!
The great news was that it was completely covered by my insurance--not even a co-pay.
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For some reason I just found this thread.
I work in a professional environment and haven't worn makeup since my interview three years ago, with no ill effects (one promotion and a very positive pretenure review).
I wear pantyhose only if I'm going to the funeral of one of my relatives - conservative religion, not entirely comfortable with the idea of women in pants. I'm in slacks at work almost without exception but figure someone else's funeral is not the place to make a statement. I will wear tights in the winter on rare occasions - they're more comfortable and less prone to runs. One pairs lasts me several years.
I wear my hair in a simple blunt-cut bob just above my shoulders; I get it trimmed at a cheap place because I'm afraid I'd cut it crooked if I did it myself, but one of my goals is to get over that and just learn how to do it right. I'm over 50% gray and have found that I get more respect the further it goes. I didn't like it early on when it was brown with just a few grey streaks.I thought it looked muddy. But I stuck it out for the most part (a few homemade rinses made from black walnut hulls when I couldn't stand it). Now that thegrey is dominant, I love it and get compliments all the time.
Every stitch of my wardrobe other than underwear came from thrift stores. I don't have access to any swanky neighborhood ones now,but I did several years ago before our move to the country, so I built a wardrobe of quality classics. It,s been eight years, so a lot of even the quality pieces have given up the ghost (or 'shrunk in the closet,' a whole 'nother story!) but having had that base to build on meant I could look at my leisure in the completely unswanky thrifts in the towns nearby and snatch up the occasional find. This means don't wait to replace things as they wear out, but it's worked. I go every couple of months, find a pair of slacks if i'm lucky, a suit if I'm really lucky (less than once year because I wait for quality, Talbots or Jones New York at least), usually can find a blouse or two, rarely a scarf. My casual clothes are work boots, jeans, tees or sweatshirts/flannel shirts. Those I can find. I keep my clothing budget to$100 a year.
Shoes are not included in that budget. I have very high arches and had a lot of foot pain until I discovered some of the European clog brands. I allow a pair a year of Danskos at $120 a pair, but they last so long that I think I'll be able to skip several year after this one. I get styles that work in a professional environment. I did recently find a shocking blue pair in my size at a thrift store, so I snapped it up and now I don't have to put wear on my work wardrobes shoes for family events and the like.
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I got a Paragard (copper IUD) placed two months ago... Oof. I love it when I'm not on my cycle, but my period has gone from three days with minimal spotting before/after to 9-11 days with five days of spotting between. And very mild cramps to waking-me-up-at-night, taking 2,400-mg-of-ibuprofen-every-day bad cramps. :(
I know the first six months are supposed to be rough, so I'm going to ride it out. Just wanted to vent here!
The great news was that it was completely covered by my insurance--not even a co-pay.
I have the Paragard too, because I can't use any type of hormonal birth control. My period also got heavier and longer, which sucks - but it's been 3 years now and I guess I've just gotten used to it. It's better than the pill. :)
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I got a Paragard (copper IUD) placed two months ago... Oof. I love it when I'm not on my cycle, but my period has gone from three days with minimal spotting before/after to 9-11 days with five days of spotting between. And very mild cramps to waking-me-up-at-night, taking 2,400-mg-of-ibuprofen-every-day bad cramps. :(
I know the first six months are supposed to be rough, so I'm going to ride it out. Just wanted to vent here!
The great news was that it was completely covered by my insurance--not even a co-pay.
I'd definitely stick it out. The first 8 months for me were miserable - more so for length than pain. If you were on hormonal birth control before you switched this is also your body readjusting itself to it's normal levels.
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Another happy Murena user here. If I had done a bit more research about how the billing would change when more complete birth control coverage went into effect, I might have waited, but that's water under the bridge and I'm really happy with it. It would be something to check with your doctor about to see if there's some way to try the particular hormones that they use if you're concerned about compatibility, but if you're really concerned, there's always the copper one. I just already had ridiculous periods, so I took my chances with the hormones. The levels are seriously low since they're delivered straight to where they need to be and I haven't noticed any particular side effects.
For all the people keeping your makeup for forever, please keep an eye on it. Companies are really conservative about the recommended shelf life of makeup (that little jar icon you see on the label with a certain number in it) but bacteria can and does grow in it - it's the nature of the beast. Organic and home-made can be even worse since it won't have the better preservatives. Much like food, you can ignore the use-by date, but you've got to pay attention. One thing that I've found works for me though, is to use eyeliner a lot. A) I like it better than mascara since my lashes are really long and it has the same effect of making my eyes look bigger/more awake; B) I can pick up a dirt cheap eyeliner in a fun color and it's a nice change for going out; C) because you have to sharpen them, you get rid of the top layer of the cosmetic and the bacteria living there too, so it stays safe longer. Wins on all accounts! And brown liner is subtle enough to be one of those little boosts that don't scream "I put this on with a trowel!"
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Great topic! I hope you don't mind if I pipe in. :)
There are certain areas of lady-hood that I do participate in. For example, I tweeze my eyebrows, but luckily that just requires a one-time purchase of tweezers (I've had them waxed maybe 3 times in my life, but I can see how some would get in the habit). I also get my hair cut at a salon, but I do it once a year on my birthday. I own nail polish that I've had for several years and occasionally I'll put some on my toenails. I also shave with a razor, but I do it in the shower and I find my razors last a really long time. Finally, I own some make-up, but I only use it on special occasions when I want to look good so it also lasts a very long time.
I've mentioned this before, but I think the thing that makes me feel the most awesome is exercise and being fit and healthy.
I could have written this myself, with respect to the makeup, nail polish, shaving, and haircuts.
I spoil myself with healthy food (which helps your skin and complexion) and fitness (though I'm off that bandwagon right now with a small infant, I tend to spend my money on the YMCA where I can swim, bike, lift, and on a tri-athlon training program annually). Though I wasn't very good the first 10 years after I moved to California, I am pretty anal about sunscreen now, which helps me look a good 5-10 years younger than I am (42). Though the kids are aging me. :)
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I love this thread! It gave me a lot to think about with respect to birth control/menstruation and hair removal. When I go to the doctor next I think I'll check into getting an IUD. Right now, my husband and I use condoms, but that adds up and if I can ditch the period, there goes the tampons. :)
With respect to everything else, my parents were great in that they raised me to be comfortable with my body and to feel like I had to wear makeup. My mom doesn't wear makeup or dye her hair (though she's pretty lucky, at 45 she's only got about 7 gray hairs). So everyday I only use shampoo (whatever's cheapest, it doesn't seem to matter to my hair), bar soap, contact solution, chapstick, and a comb. I use a razor to shave every few days, though after reading this thread I'm thinking of checking out an epilator or laser hair removal. That's really about all I use. I have a few bottles of nail polish, so I keep my toenails polished, but there is no way I would pay for a pedicure. I would say clothes are my obsession though. I have approx. 250 shirts (which is way overkill, I know). But I swap with family members (same size as mom and sister) and I mainly get them from thrift stores and charity garage sales and when I'm done with them they get donated again. So it sounds completely absurd, but I only spend around $150 a year on clothes (including expensive undies and bras). For anyone in the Seattle area, definitely go to the Vision House garage sale in August in Renton. It's how I support my shirt problem (think 65 shirts for $15, it helps that I know my size and how different brand fit really well).
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When I go to the doctor next I think I'll check into getting an IUD. Right now, my husband and I use condoms, but that adds up and if I can ditch the period, there goes the tampons. :)
If you have health insurance, birth control should be covered after your first plan rollover after August 1st, 2012 with no co-pay, deductible, or coinsurance. My plan year isn't up until the end of March, so it isn't free for me until April. I know my pills are now free, but I have no idea about the IUD. I'm assuming so! I would investigate since that would definitely save you some money then!!
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I have to dress at a high professional level for work, since part of my job is to make presentations to boards of directors. To do this, I use a high/low approach. I have two viciously expensive St. John Knit blazers I bought years ago, wear at least weekly and can throw in a suitcase. They wear like iron and rarely need dry cleaning. I cringed at the price when I bought them, and delayed buying them for years because of the price, but they are the best clothing purchases I have ever made.
Everything else comes from thrift shops and 90% clearance sales except my shoes, which are usually Frye boots I buy on Ebay. There are two or three styles of Frye boots that fit my strangely shaped feet and I look for them and bid low. (If I win, great. If not, there will be more boots next week.) I carry Coach bags I bought at an outlet 20 years ago. The original leather ones last forever. I have also gotten totes on Ebay. Bought one that retailed at $1,000 for $90. Used it constantly for 5 years.
I have one outfit I get constant compliments on. It's a St. John Knit blazer, a houndstooth skirt I bought for $2.99 at a thrift shop, Frye Boots from Ebay, tights from the drugstore and a necklace I made as described below. I would be comfortable meeting the Queen in this outfit. (Though for the Queen I would wear a hat!)
I make my own necklaces, usually three-strand bead twists, again using high-low. I intersperse glass beads bought in bulk with a few freshwater pearls and semiprecious stones. I use jewelry catalogues like Ross-Simons for inspiration. I buy the pearls and semi-precious stones at discount bead shops on 6th Avenue in NYC.
Hair is a big expense for me. I have wavy/curly fine hair with numerous cowlicks. I have a hairdresser in NYC who is a genius and makes it look fantastic. I use her twice a year and trim it myself the rest of the time. She costs $150!!!!!, but no one cuts hair like her. (Never thought I would say that, but people remark on her cuts.) I do not color. My hair is mouse brown and the gray coming in looks kind of nice in contrast. Also, I am not one of those people who want to take the time to color every two weeks or whatever it takes to keep a gray stripe from showing, and I think the stripe looks worse than salt and pepper.
I do wear makeup. I have very sparse eyebrows and small deeply set eyes and if I wear no makeup people are always asking me if I am tired. I use couponing websites to search for drugstore deals on makeup. If you use the coupons right - combine 2 for 1 sales with store coupons and manufactuer coupons and rebates, you can get makeup for pennies. I use Olay products on my face because a Target deal a couple of years ago actually make me $5 for every $20 I spent. Yes, I do mean a net negative cost. Those are rare, and you have to avoid hoarding instincts when they come along. I use sunscreen all the time because melanoma runs in the family and use the same process to buy it as I do makeup. I have expensive makeup brushes that were a Christmas present. I wash them regularly with shampoo.
As far as other personal care, for some reason razors last me forever. The one I am using now is still going strong after a year. I never use shaving cream - soap is fine. I wash my hair with very diluted dandruff shampoo. A small bottle lasts at least a year. I exfoliate with a rough washcloth and have very good skin. I like to take baths and buy bath salts and bubbles in bulk at the post-Christmas sales. I found an especially good Bath and Body Works deal two years ago and am still working on that.
I agree with Mrs. MM and others that a healthy diet, an active life and (very important for me) a good night's sleep are the best beauty treatments.
Anyway, that's what works for me. When I decide to pull the trigger and retire (not sure when that will be, still having fun), my wardrobe will go almost entirely thrift shop, since I plan to live in fleece and jeans.
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As a 25 year old guy I don't meet the Lady Stache requirement of this thread but I really wanted to weigh in on some of this perception stuff and the fear of leaving behind the expensive makeup, clothing etc.
Skin tight jeans, 3 inch heels, make up, lingerie, and what have you do nothing for me. IMO, there is nothing more attractive than a woman who is comfortable. Truthfully, if you're happy and you're making it visibly noticeable you've immediately got my attention. A smile can stop me in my tracks. Be happy and be true to yourself and the rest just fades away.
Jokingly, I've always said that make up is for ugly people. It's blunt, but carries some truth. Using make up means that you have to 'make up' for something you lack. By that standard, any users owe themselves a little more respect in my opinion. Be true, be you. (was that a slogan for something?)
A few of you ladies have touched on it quite nicely, but I just wanted to reiterate. Carry on :)
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Another lady mini-stache here!
For those of us who want hair removal, my biggest tip is that I have not found any major difference between fancy salons that charge $40 for an eyebrow waxing and a hole-in-the wall place that charges $15.
What about laser hair removal? I decided to do laser hair removal on my bikini line when a recommended place had a special going on. It seems that, if it indeed is permanent, it will have paid for itself in less than 2 years.
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If you have health insurance, birth control should be covered after your first plan rollover after August 1st, 2012 with no co-pay, deductible, or coinsurance. My plan year isn't up until the end of March, so it isn't free for me until April. I know my pills are now free, but I have no idea about the IUD. I'm assuming so! I would investigate since that would definitely save you some money then!!
Thanks! I hope it is. I guess I'll just wait for summer when the plan rolls over.
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This area is hard for me too. I'm new here, and I certainly thought I was fairly frugal until discovering this community! As much as I'd like to forgo all the feminine extras, it's important to me that I look my best. However, I do take particular pride in looking just like my anti-mustaschian friends but by spending much, much less than them! Here's what I do to get my lady-things for less or for free!
Skincare: This is a biggie for me. My skin is dry, oily, acne-prone, and extremely sensitive. My biggest tip is that if you have an issue (acne, aging, extremely dry skin), try a trip to a dermotologist instead of trying to self-treat with drugstore brands. Of course this depends on your health insurance situation, but for me, the co-pay is only $15 and generic perscriptions are only $7. Trying multiple lotions and creams gets expensive and usually not as effective as whatever the doctor recommends. And often, they load you up with samples so you can get away with not purchasing anything for a while. In terms of brands- Cetaphil is inexpensive has worked wonders for me! When you hone in on what works for you, buy in bulk from Amazon (much cheaper than the drug store).
Make-Up: Again, with my skin, I can't just slap anything on my face. I have found that certain products work best for me and surprise, surprise, they are more expensive. However, I keep it extremely simple- I have 5 pieces of makeup, total, and use it sparingly. I don't try new things. Still, the cost of the make-up bugs me, so here's how avoid feeling guilty- I used credit card reward points to get a $250 Sephora gift card 2 years ago. I think I have something like $40 left. Ack, $105 a year is still a ton to spend on make-up. I still feel guilty about this one. I've since switched to a cash rewards card, so I'm not sure what I'll do when it runs out.
Clothing: The biggest thing for me is to avoid shopping altogether. When I really need something, I go for quality items on sale. I first try the thrift stores, then move on to the mall, armed with coupons. Never, ever buy anything from Ann Taylor, Loft, Gap, or Banana Republic if it's not AT LEAST 40% off!! Also, you need to go in determined to only buy what you came for. I know this is basic, but I still need to give myself a little pep talk before heading in. Avoid anything that is dry-clean only. I keep my work wardrobe simple with classic pieces, and then I add some flair with vintage garage-sale jewelry. According to Mint, I've managed to keep my clothing spending at $245 for 2012. This includes socks, shoes, some replacement athletic gear, and building up a professional wardrobe. Not perfect, I know, but much better than most anti-mustaschians!
For undies- if you put yourself on the Victoria's Secret mailing list, they'll send you coupons for a free pair of panties! I have my mom on the list too, and she passes the coupons on to me. So I haven't paid for underwear in years.
I totally agree with everyone that said that taking care of yourself through diet and exercise is the most important thing! This is a priority of mine as well. My own mother is nearly 60 and doesn't look a day over 45 and I know it's because she's kept herself in tip-top shape.
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I also just ran into this thread and was glad to see it here. I think my biggest spending areas are really between lady-stuff and the cats.
Skin & Makeup are not huge areas for me. I use makeup but get gift cards and don't lay out much cash.
Hair is a major spending area though. I do color about 8x per year and a cut about 4 times per year or less (I cut my own bangs). Basically growing in gray didn't work out the way I thought it would and hair modeling hasn't been all the successful for me in the past at two places. My only saving grace here is having long enough hair that it doesn't need a cut every month! OVERALL: I am embarrassed to say how much I spend, honestly.
Clothes are mostly not an issue (plenty of swaps, plenty of thrift and resale places and I have a full closet) but every once in a while I feel like I need a specific thing for work/weather/function and since I have promised myself not to buy sweatshop clothes or shoes, I will lay down some cash from time to time if I can't find anything at thrifts/resale (I keep a list of stuff I'm looking for with me) as long as it's a quality brand with decent labor &/or environmental standards. Mostly I'm trying to limit buying new though, primarily because of the ecological impact of manufacturing new materials.
I eat well - I'm vegan and we we belong to a CSA and food co-op so I have no shortage of vegetables and I've been vegan for 17 years so I'm well-versed on protein, iron, calcium, etc and have always received a clean bill of health (it's pathetic I even feel like I need to give that disclaimer but there is always someone who insists I must be dying). Given the CSA and co-op, food expenses are pretty cheap. We eat out rarely.
The personal trainer - however! - is another major expense. I totally agree with folks here that being healthy and feeling good about yourself is the best feeling and sort of overrides some of that other stuff but I'm just not at a point yet where I can do strength training unattended safely! Cardio, yes! But strength training, no - and I have an awesome trainer who I love and have been working with since October and I can already see major changes so that is totally worth it to me. BUT. That's another big ticket item.
So - hair, trainer and sometimes clothes. Completely unmustachian. When I wonder how people can save 50-60% of their salary but I can't...these are probably pretty good reasons why. Hopefully some of that will change eventually.
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Jesse, sounds like you're doing great.
Just wanted to add, if the trainer is worth it to you for the motivation, then go right ahead. I've got a few sessions with one myself at the moment and thinking about continuing if we get on well.
But I would seriously challenge the assumption that you aren't competent to do it alone safely. It's not rocket science. There is loads of info in books and on the internet. And if your trainer isn't actually teaching you enough to be able to do stuff yourself after 4 months, they're either not very good or deliberately prolonging their own employment. I guess the exception would be if you are rehabilitating injuries.
I recommend Rachel Cosgrove's book The Female Body Breakthrough.
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I found out you can make your own sugar wax (for waxing legs). I tried it and the recipe I used wasn't the best (too thick) but I think I'll be successful next time. Talk about cheap hair removal options! Sugar is super cheap, and the cloth strips are washable/reusable.
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As a 25 year old guy I don't meet the Lady Stache requirement of this thread but I really wanted to weigh in on some of this perception stuff and the fear of leaving behind the expensive makeup, clothing etc.
Skin tight jeans, 3 inch heels, make up, lingerie, and what have you do nothing for me. IMO, there is nothing more attractive than a woman who is comfortable. Truthfully, if you're happy and you're making it visibly noticeable you've immediately got my attention. A smile can stop me in my tracks. Be happy and be true to yourself and the rest just fades away.
What a great thread! I rarely look at anything related to beauty/makeup/etc online or in magazines, as I usually learn absolutely nothing and don't find my views reflected at all. This thread has been full of great info! And I want to add to the many kudos to bicycle's post about perception.
I am a lady (beginning) stach, but have mostly male friends, as I find most females I meet to be a bit too caught up on superficial things for me to have any common ground with them. (As a disclaimer, I do tend to live in states with a lot of superficial people - not naming names. This was not such an issue when I lived in Maine, where flannel and taxidermy skills were considered sexy- my kind of place!) And from hanging out extensively with males, I find that Arbor33's opinion is very common. Most of my male friends look at a girl who walks into the bar with tons of make-up, and who obviously spent hours on hair and clothes as high-maintenance, probably self-absorbed and just not very interesting, and as likely more trouble than they're worth. (Not to stereotype all dolled-up women, but it's true more often than not in my experience. Also, you can tell the dolled-up females who are really having a fun time and seem down-to-earth, vs. the ones who are real sourpusses and take themselves way too seriously - aka prima donnas.)
Growing up, I was certainly no beauty queen (though not ugly) and was very naive in hair/makeup/fashion matters. (Now that I'm older, I'm just not interested in the least.) At some stage in high school, I decided that rather than spend a couple hours a day trying to doll myself up and impress guys, to little result, I'd rather be using that time learning about/doing things that actually interest me and attract a man for more substantial reasons than just looks. Of course in college, I did the classic "angry young chick" thing and went overboard, getting hideous haircuts, wearing really sloppy clothes, bad dye jobs. Now, as I get older (now 26) I have reached the happy medium where I am just natural. I shower, put on mascara, and brush my hair. That's it. I have always liked just wearing plain clothes - it makes life simple and cheap - and I can wear a plain black shirt and denim shorts/ a black skirt/jeans every day of the week and never go out of style. Just as well, because I would rather rake the lawn than go to the mall. And that's something a lot of men would find sexy! A good way to get a natural blush on.
A couple of things I find funny:
1: I think heavy make-up mostly looks unnecessary and a bit ridiculous. I always wonder - "what are they trying so hard to cover up?" Or: "Wow, she must be rough in the morning!" I do have friends that actually look really hot with make-up on. But, when I see them without it, they just look weird - and even slightly unattractive though they're not actually unattractive at all. It's just that I'm not used to seeing them without it. And of course, most people who wear heavy makeup (especially celebrities) look horrible when you first see them without makeup - not because they're ugly, but because compared to seeing them all dolled-up and perfect-looking, seeing them looking real is a shock.
...Whereas, when I do scrub myself up nicely every once in a while and put on a nice dress and do the slightest thing to my hair, I get lots of compliments. So, if you wear make-up, it may look nice, but people get used to seeing you that way and you have to keep wearing it all the time. Whereas if you're natural, it's easy to impress when you put just a slight effort in.
2: Now that I'm almost ten years out of high school, I find myself getting a lot of compliments and attention from males that I would've never imagined in high school. To be fair, it's usually men in their thirties and up, as I think they've been around the block enough to know that there's a lot more than meets the eye, and looks are only an aspect of a person. While a dolled-up chick may be pleasing to the eye, at the end of the day, my male friends seem to prefer spending time with a female who is fun to hang out with, has a sense of humor, can converse on different topics, has hobbies and interests other than shopping, smiles genuinely, doesn't take herself too seriously, isn't a fussy buzzkill... If she's also beautiful, all the better. If she's not a beauty queen, it's amazing how much a good personality can make a person genuinely attractive. And yes, a genuine smile is the most beautiful thing!
It's funny, it takes a bit of self-confidence to buck the trend as a high-school gal and to not go along with the whole obsession with looks and beauty trends and fashion - but it does definitely pay off a few years down the line! I wish the female magazines would report on this!
Another thing - I'm sure everyone on this forum knows full well how ridiculous "trends" are. What cracks me up in particular is how the magazines will seriously report "this season, the natural, just-rolled-out-of-bed look is in! And here's the eight products you need to achieve it!" Then they'll go on to report how to wash your hair, dry it, and then style it so it looks like you just rolled out of bed. Uhh, there's a much easier way! Similarly, the products they have that you spray on your hair to make it look like you just got out of the ocean, or have dirty hair, or whatever. Too much!
I'm very lucky to have a partner who thinks I'm the sexiest gal in the room even when I'm wearing his flannel, muddy jeans from the garden, and gumboots. Now that is a catch! But from Arbor33's comment, and from talking to my male friends, I think that men, as a whole, are unfairly cast as shallow. Sure, there's plenty of shallow men out there, just like there's plenty of shallow women. But females are taught from such a young age that we have to constantly work on our looks or no man will want us, when really, a lot of men do look for a whole lot more in a woman. And the ones who don't probably aren't worth trying to catch.
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I don't wear make-up. (Would you eat whatever make-up product you are putting on your skin? Because your skin is soaking it into your body).
Another thing that I find funny - a lot of female spend their whole lives slapping heaps of products onto their faces, trying to look good - but isn't all that stuff going to age your skin? Fear not - then you can switch to the zillion "age-defying" products out there.
Too much work, I reckon, when it seems you could just do what most people here are saying - get exercise, stay hydrated, eat well, and genuinely feel good, and let it show through naturally.
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On body hair... I know, on the surface, it is expensive but... I got electrolysis. I got it on my eyebrows. I think it probably all in all cost like $1000 for all the treatments ($60ish an hour). However, it is PERMANENT. I don't even remember the last time I paid for waxing them. I tweeze the occasional stray here or there but mainly I trim them when they get longish. And that's it! and I look good all the time. I hated waxing and tweezing because it is so hard to get that good arch each time, and do it evenly, each time... nothing worse than overtweezing. fuck it, electrolysis man, so worth it for eyebrows.
I bought the cheapest men's razors (like 12 for $2) at Walmart and they seem to last forever. I am still working on this bag from years ago. They are these cheap two blade disposables. One blade lasts months. I only shave when I know I'll be wearing shorts/skirts, and even then maybe once a week. I shave in the shower.
My uniform for work is black slacks (I do have one pair of gray) and a button down shirt. I have various colors of shirts and then I have about 5 black blazers I will wear over them sometimes. That is my work outfit. It works fine. I got almost all of it from the thrift store.
I use baking soda on my hair and it works just as good if not better than shampoo. I don't need/use conditioner.
I make my own soap out of coconut oil, olive oil, and lye. It costs around the same as Dove bar soap (maybe cheaper) but I use it on my whole face and body, and I know what is in it. And it's fun to make :) And I have enough to last me an entire year.
I use Purpose skin lotion on my face since it has SPF 15. If I am going to work or "out" for the night I will wear mascara and eyeliner. I try to buy things that don't test on animals from drug stores and they still don't cost much. My latest mascara was E.L.F brand and it's great and it cost $3. I am lucky that I don't need that other stuff so I don't generally wear it. I have a foundation lotion from Clinique that I will wear for a very special occasion (Court, weddings). The eye makeup lasts for like a year. The Clinique will go yucky before I run out.
I find keeping my hair longer is cheaper because with short hair you have to do regular maintenance trims. I also cut my own hair. It's really easy to give yourself layers. I originally found this on YouTube but I can't find the video now. Anyway, What you do is you take a shower, and then get out of the shower, lean over, and comb your hair forward (while it is still wet), so it's all in your face. Then put it in a ponytail holder kinda close to the head. In other words, make a pony tail, only it's in front of your face instead of where it would normally go. Make sure that the hair in the ponytail is all evenly tight and it is centered. Then pull the ponytail holder down the hair shafts to the place where you plan to cut. Cut off the end of the ponytail. If this is your first time just snip only an inch off or something so you can see how this works. Because you are combing your hair forward, and then cutting one straight line cross the ponytail holder, naturally the hair in front (closer to the ponytail holder) is going to be shorter than the hair in the back. If you want it shorter, repeat. This works, this works, I swear, and I haven't paid to cut my hair since, because the layers are so even, I get to choose where they go, and I can choose when to do it. It's awesome.
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@englyn - thank you for that suggestion; I'll start checking the libraries. I think I try to overcompensate w/both free weights & abs exercises when I'm pushing myself & end up w/sore neck/shoulders or muscle failure during the last reps. (The trainer corrects my form although I've been trying to watch what proper form looks like in the mirror there to know how to replicate it on my own.) Glad to have a resource to look into.
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I don't care, or want to know, whether men think that I've struck the right balance between frugality and stylishness. I am going to wear makeup or not, as I please. I'm going to wear clothes that I think look & feel good. I'm going to work out and act confident and happy just as much as I feel like it.
I understand that guys who say "I like it better when women don't wear makeup" are trying to be helpful, but they're still implying that they are entitled to an opinion about how women should dress. News flash: you don't get a say unless I asked you.
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I don't care, or want to know, whether men think that I've struck the right balance between frugality and stylishness. I am going to wear makeup or not, as I please. I'm going to wear clothes that I think look & feel good. I'm going to work out and act confident and happy just as much as I feel like it.
I understand that guys who say "I like it better when women don't wear makeup" are trying to be helpful, but they're still implying that they are entitled to an opinion about how women should dress. News flash: you don't get a say unless I asked you.
Don't be rude. The way you present yourself is of no matter to me just as the way I do is likely of no matter to you. People's attire is of minuscule importance to me if it even registers on my radar whatsoever, regardless of sex.
The OP said she is working on new habits but can't commit 100% because some of her concern is fear based.
...I am very proud of these new habits but I know I can do more.
...I can't seem to let go of wanting to "spoil myself" and "look good". It's part vanity and part fear. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
Was I really treading out of bounds with my attempt to quell some of the fear? Relax m'lady, I'm helping, or at least trying...
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My wording was stronger than necessary, but I don't want you to miss my point. Please be aware than when you say "I like it better when women [do X frugal thing with their appearance]" or "Makeup is so un-sexy, I like it better if women don't wear makeup," it includes "I'm still going to evaluate your appearance, but what you have chosen to do pleases me. You may continue." To come here, do that, and then call me rude? Well, it takes balls.
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How's this for blasphemous? In my crazy early-20s-six-figure-money-making days, I once dropped $1100 at the Bobbi Brown counter.
!
Oh, the shame. THE SHAME!
I was one dumb bunny.
Not anymore. I have an auto-immune skin disease so *sensitive* doesn't quite cover it. And you know, proper nutrition (gave up everything containing sugar 10 years ago), plenty of water, fresh air and regular exercise is my best bet. Well, DUH.
I still have the powder-based BB stuff but with sensitive-eye issues, change my (super-cheap drugstore variety) mascara tube every two months like clock-work and use wholesale-sourced-lasts-forever-mineral-based face powder for a nice polish. I make homemade lip balm for non-sticky, kissable lips.
When I turned 30 and I was really broke-ass, I started learning how to make my own stuff. I researched for six months before going for it (I'm not an engineer or a researcher by trade, so I'm really proud of this part of the equation). At first it was embarrassing. (WTF?!) I'm so over it. I've recently been approached to start a private skin care line.
Non-SLS shampoo, jojoba-based leave-in oil/conditioner for my waist-length hair, castile based soaps and body washes, rose waters and oils for the face. It doesn't get more natural or inexpensive than that.
I have no intentions of starting a skin care line (though it was tempting) so I'm happy to share recipes if anyone is interested.
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My wording was stronger than necessary, but I don't want you to miss my point. Please be aware than when you say "I like it better when women [do X frugal thing with their appearance]" or "Makeup is so un-sexy, I like it better if women don't wear makeup," it includes "I'm still going to evaluate your appearance, but what you have chosen to do pleases me. You may continue." To come here, do that, and then call me rude? Well, it takes balls.
Your paraphrasing is abhorrent and you've obviously missed my point entirely. With all due respect, your misunderstanding warrants no further replies. I'm sorry we couldn't mutually benefit from each other's opinions.
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yes to recipes, Nathalie
I always used to think there was something wrong with me that the make-up counter was so excessive, or the skin creams, etc. I used to think that "real" women should somehow be able to afford these things - I think that's the message that's implied.
The only thing I really "need" to spend money on in this category (and feel free to slap or give suggestions) is my crazy, curly long hair which is picky as hell and will sulk if I give it supermarket-quality stuff. Most of the hair stuff I buy is ridiculously expensive but luckily lasts a long time. At least (as said before) I've stopped the highlights, it has thanked me for that... but if it's not well-fed, I can look like a frizzy poodle, or something.
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Message me if you're so inclined... happy to discuss specifics and (if I can) help you find something that works!
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My wording was stronger than necessary, but I don't want you to miss my point. Please be aware than when you say "I like it better when women [do X frugal thing with their appearance]" or "Makeup is so un-sexy, I like it better if women don't wear makeup," it includes "I'm still going to evaluate your appearance, but what you have chosen to do pleases me. You may continue." To come here, do that, and then call me rude? Well, it takes balls.
You dress to get a point across to the people around you (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/ask-a-mustachian/keeping-up-appearances/msg19406/#msg19406), but they're not allowed to notice how you dress and form an opinion based on those observations if they happen to be male? And even you yourself are allowed to judge people based on their clothes, and explicitly admit doing so (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/useless-crap-i-can't-believe-people-buy/msg44901/#msg44901), but having testicles somehow disqualifies half of humanity from the same privilege?
Really? Arbor came here to make a productive comment equivalent to several such comments that you yourself have made in the past and you have nothing more productive to do than jump down his throat?
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I have been frugal for a very long time, but just starting to grow my stache.
I have been using OCM (oil cleansing method) on my face for several years now. I use about 50/50 castor & extra virgin olive oil, I moisturize with jojoba oil. I have been using a mineral make up company that I found online years ago. My sister and I are the same shade so we split a bulk order of minerals and it will last us for years. Drinking lots of H2O, eating lots of fruits & veggies does amazing things for the skin.
I shave with cheap disposable razors & the same bar soap I shower with. I use tweezers for my brows and a manicure scissor closely trim facial hair. I remember the Epi-lady from when I was a teenager, it hurt like hell. I don't know if I could get used to that, but I'm intrigued.
I have curly hair & I use a conditioner only hair washing method (Similar to Wen) but you can use cheap stuff like Suave naturals. I use LA Looks Sport gel. My sister cuts my hair for me. I don't use color. Don't have grey hair yet :) I don't wet my hair in the shower every day. I usually wear it up the second & sometimes the third day. It saves on products, time and hot water! I just started do this this year & it is helping save me so much time in the morning and I use lots of conditioner so this is really going to reduce the $ I spend!
I use a Diva cup that I have had for 8 years, with homemade cloth panty liners. DH got a vasectomy a few years ago, so no BC expenses!
If I want a mani or pedi I do it myself. I typically keep my finger nails polish free because they chip so quickly. But in flip flop season I do my own toes and they last a month if I don't change the color first. It helps that I'm freaked out about the cleanliness of the nail places. Do they really sterilize the tools properly??? I'd rather not take the risk, or pay!
I love thrift shopping but I keep it to a minimum. I wear a uniform of sorts to work. At home I wear jeans or yoga pants and tee shirts. If I need to look dressed up I just wear my work clothes. My work clothes come off as soon as I get home and I usually just slip into my PJ's. This way I don't stain my work clothes when I'm cooking dinner.
I love hanging clothes on the line it typically means less wrinkling, less ironing & it saves wear & tear on the clothes, on the dryer & also saves on the electric bill!
I love this thread!!!
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I have been frugal for a very long time, but just starting to grow my stache.
I have been using OCM (oil cleansing method) on my face for several years now. I use about 50/50 castor & extra virgin olive oil, I moisturize with jojoba oil. I have been using a mineral make up company that I found online years ago. My sister and I are the same shade so we split a bulk order of minerals and it will last us for years. Drinking lots of H2O, eating lots of fruits & veggies does amazing things for the skin.
I shave with cheap disposable razors & the same bar soap I shower with. I use tweezers for my brows and a manicure scissor closely trim facial hair. I remember the Epi-lady from when I was a teenager, it hurt like hell. I don't know if I could get used to that, but I'm intrigued.
I have curly hair & I use a conditioner only hair washing method (Similar to Wen) but you can use cheap stuff like Suave naturals. I use LA Looks Sport gel. My sister cuts my hair for me. I don't use color. Don't have grey hair yet :) I don't wet my hair in the shower every day. I usually wear it up the second & sometimes the third day. It saves on products, time and hot water! I just started do this this year & it is helping save me so much time in the morning and I use lots of conditioner so this is really going to reduce the $ I spend!
I use a Diva cup that I have had for 8 years, with homemade cloth panty liners. DH got a vasectomy a few years ago, so no BC expenses!
If I want a mani or pedi I do it myself. I typically keep my finger nails polish free because they chip so quickly. But in flip flop season I do my own toes and they last a month if I don't change the color first. It helps that I'm freaked out about the cleanliness of the nail places. Do they really sterilize the tools properly??? I'd rather not take the risk, or pay!
I love thrift shopping but I keep it to a minimum. I wear a uniform of sorts to work. At home I wear jeans or yoga pants and tee shirts. If I need to look dressed up I just wear my work clothes. My work clothes come off as soon as I get home and I usually just slip into my PJ's. This way I don't stain my work clothes when I'm cooking dinner.
I love hanging clothes on the line it typically means less wrinkling, less ironing & it saves wear & tear on the clothes, on the dryer & also saves on the electric bill!
I love this thread!!!
I just started the oil cleansing method and at least the main website (or rather the one that got the url) suggested no more than 30% castor oil. I've got pretty acne prone skin though, so I'll have to keep it in mind that I could at least experiment with a higher concentration if I need it.
One word of caution on the mani-pedi front is to make sure that you clean your own tools properly too. It's been years since I had a manicure, but I trimmed my cuticle too close a couple years ago and managed to get my nail bed infected. It was seriously painful and needed antibiotics. That sort of thing is totally treatable, so don't worry too much, but it's also totally preventable, and that's the better way to do it :-).
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My wording was stronger than necessary, but I don't want you to miss my point. Please be aware than when you say "I like it better when women [do X frugal thing with their appearance]" or "Makeup is so un-sexy, I like it better if women don't wear makeup," it includes "I'm still going to evaluate your appearance, but what you have chosen to do pleases me. You may continue." To come here, do that, and then call me rude? Well, it takes balls.
You dress to get a point across to the people around you (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/ask-a-mustachian/keeping-up-appearances/msg19406/#msg19406), but they're not allowed to notice how you dress and form an opinion based on those observations if they happen to be male? And even you yourself are allowed to judge people based on their clothes, and explicitly admit doing so (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/useless-crap-i-can't-believe-people-buy/msg44901/#msg44901), but having testicles somehow disqualifies half of humanity from the same privilege?
Really? Arbor came here to make a productive comment equivalent to several such comments that you yourself have made in the past and you have nothing more productive to do than jump down his throat?
Well-said.
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On an economic note... Isn't it ironic that the simpler/more "natural" a commercial beauty product, generally the more expensive it is? Like, you could go to the dollar store or the regular beauty section of a drugstore and have your choice of 5000 products with 20 or 50 ingredients, most of which only a scientist would recognize. But if you go to buy a simpler/more natural product, they're often ridiculously expensive. For example - you can get cheap body scrub at the dollar store, with all sorts of chemicals and things. Or you can get a nice body scrub for $20 that lists all the things it doesn't have in it - no harsh chemicals, parabens, etc, etc - or you could make this body scrub with some oil and sugar at home for less than $1 - without having to pay $19 for the privilege of leaving out harsh chemicals and parabens.
I understand that the cheap products are cheap because their "ingredients" are chemicals that are probably very cheap to produce in mass quantities, but it just strikes me as really bizarre to spend a lot more money for a simpler product that you could probably replicate at home for cheaper than the dollar store stuff. And in general, it makes me tend to believe that a lot of these "natural" product lines are just huge marketing schemes to make money off of well-intentioned people who will put out more money to feel green/ethical/natural/etc.
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I am very "low maintenance" in grooming respects. My female trappings is footwear. I don't buy many pairs and none of them are heels but each year I drop 400-600$ on new boots and/or shoes. (And I wear scrubs and runners to work!!). I admit that I could buy fewer but i won't shop at Payless. I find cheaper footwear to be tasteless and uncomfortable. It doesn't help that I live one block from the best shoe store imaginable.
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On an economic note... Isn't it ironic that the simpler/more "natural" a commercial beauty product, generally the more expensive it is? . . . .. you can get a nice body scrub for $20 that lists all the things it doesn't have in it - no harsh chemicals, parabens, etc, etc - or you could make this body scrub with some oil and sugar at home for less than $1 - without having to pay $19 for the privilege of leaving out harsh chemicals and parabens.
I understand that the cheap products are cheap because their "ingredients" are chemicals that are probably very cheap to produce in mass quantities, but it just strikes me as really bizarre to spend a lot more money for a simpler product that you could probably replicate at home for cheaper than the dollar store stuff. And in general, it makes me tend to believe that a lot of these "natural" product lines are just huge marketing schemes to make money off of well-intentioned people who will put out more money to feel green/ethical/natural/etc.
I find this bizarre as well. There are companies who do care about their products, but inevitably they get bought out (looking at you Burt's Bees) and the naturalness destroyed. Most things can be made at home anyway.
I have a grocery store nearby that has bulk shampoo and conditioner, so I can get the SLS/paraben/etc-free stuff at a reasonable price.
I'll also recommend pretty much anything made by Badger - their sore joint rub is better than IcyHot! (As an athlete, that is huge). It's mostly beeswax, olive + essential oils, but they have economy of scale with the essential oils that makes the price worth it. When you're done you can reuse the metal cans too. :-)
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My wording was stronger than necessary, but I don't want you to miss my point. Please be aware than when you say "I like it better when women [do X frugal thing with their appearance]" or "Makeup is so un-sexy, I like it better if women don't wear makeup," it includes "I'm still going to evaluate your appearance, but what you have chosen to do pleases me. You may continue." To come here, do that, and then call me rude? Well, it takes balls.
You dress to get a point across to the people around you (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/ask-a-mustachian/keeping-up-appearances/msg19406/#msg19406), but they're not allowed to notice how you dress and form an opinion based on those observations if they happen to be male? And even you yourself are allowed to judge people based on their clothes, and explicitly admit doing so (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/useless-crap-i-can't-believe-people-buy/msg44901/#msg44901), but having testicles somehow disqualifies half of humanity from the same privilege?
Really? Arbor came here to make a productive comment equivalent to several such comments that you yourself have made in the past and you have nothing more productive to do than jump down his throat?
Well-said.
I don't want to encourage dragging this one out because I understand why there is discomfort for all re that response -- but I felt similarly to galaxie when I read that (although I wouldn't have worded it that way). When I read the OP saying it was part vanity and part fear -- fear of WHAT wasn't indicated (that I saw in the original post).
If I said I was holding off on giving up those things out of fear/vanity, in a general way it could be: fear of public perception re professionalism and being polished, fear of not being found attractive, fear of not liking what I look like myself, fear of change, etc. I think it was assumed it was fear of not being found attractive, which I thought was presumptuous. Maybe I missed the part later on where she came out and said that outright, don't know. It's just a tricky area because most people assume that women want to be attractive for the opposite sex, which is a challenging assumption, and a little disheartening to me. (I like to look how I look and if someone finds me attractive, then great. If not, oh well. I still wear/do things my partner dislikes relevant to my appearance. If he assured me he likes something one me, I can't say I will reconcile that thought with me looking the way I want to. Does part of my appearance get influenced by what is conventionally attractive? Sure.)
Anyway, that assumption got the same reaction from me so galaxie wasn't alone on that one and I can understand the anger behind the response given.
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I'm not a frills girl. I get my hair colored when I see too many grays. I don't really care about hair cuts. I have an "80's" look, I've been told, but it's easy. I wear make up sometimes, always foundation. And I use dollar shampoo. I was raised by my Dad, so girly things don't really matter. My husband sure doesn't mind!!
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I just want to add this one thing for those of us who feel like they need/want to wear makeup/concealer. I use pinterest to find a lot of style DIY stuff and on there i found this link for DIY BB Cream. I have red skin (i'll be looking into the oil wash asap) and work in the corporate world so on the days that I need to present (or video conference) this is what I do:
http://www.weddingbee.com/2011/12/29/helpful-series-ace-your-face-pt-1/#axzz2MgGkUgZD
And yes, you don't need to buy the high definition stuff from sephora - her link to the bulk distributor is the same and you can also usually find it as finishing powder in the Party City like costume shops for like $1.99 after halloween!
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I don't want to encourage dragging this one out because I understand why there is discomfort for all re that response -- but I felt similarly to galaxie when I read that (although I wouldn't have worded it that way). When I read the OP saying it was part vanity and part fear -- fear of WHAT wasn't indicated (that I saw in the original post).
If I said I was holding off on giving up those things out of fear/vanity, in a general way it could be: fear of public perception re professionalism and being polished, fear of not being found attractive, fear of not liking what I look like myself, fear of change, etc. I think it was assumed it was fear of not being found attractive, which I thought was presumptuous. Maybe I missed the part later on where she came out and said that outright, don't know. It's just a tricky area because most people assume that women want to be attractive for the opposite sex, which is a challenging assumption, and a little disheartening to me. (I like to look how I look and if someone finds me attractive, then great. If not, oh well. I still wear/do things my partner dislikes relevant to my appearance. If he assured me he likes something one me, I can't say I will reconcile that thought with me looking the way I want to. Does part of my appearance get influenced by what is conventionally attractive? Sure.)
Anyway, that assumption got the same reaction from me so galaxie wasn't alone on that one and I can understand the anger behind the response given.
I apologize to anyone who might be offended. It most certainly wasn't my intent. Being comfortable and true to yourself was more along the lines of what I was going for.
That being said, we should probably let this thread continue on topic sans my interjection.
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The less soap/cleanser I use, the less moisturizer I need & the better my skin looks.
I begin to wonder if many personal care products are designed mostly to make us use additional, related personal care products...
Healthy from the inside definitely works!
Way more details:
I am down to water, oil (olive or grapeseed - grapeseed not usually very MMM except we are in a wine growing region & I found some at our Big Lots) and vinegar for personal care. Plus occasional rubbing alcohol for first aid and salt or baking soda (with oil) for exfoliation.
I didnt' do this overnight - I shifted from more conventional personal care over a 10 year period. Inspired by 3 things: sensitive ("cranky") skin, physical reality that cleaning comes mostly the scrubbing not the cleanser, and a desire to keep things as edible as possible. Makes packing for travel real easy, almost no liquids to squeeze in my 1-qt bag :) And I used to travel with 6 kinds of moisturizer! (Face, eye, hand, nails, body, foot - plus chapstick.) I do use dish soap on my hands when cooking.
I don't usually use makeup (I have been on TV without makeup-of course I was in my 30s then!), but did have an event where my co-chair "required" it - so bought some all-purpose mineral makeup, at least that is shelf stable. Have used it 3x in 4 yrs.
Hair, have long slightly wavy hair, I self-trim or get DH to trim the ends. Air-dry 99% of the time. Rinse 2-3x/week.
I do use plenty of tools - a good quality comb (they last a looong time), hairbrush, toothbrush, dental floss, foot brush, washcloth, fingernail scissors, cotton swabs, tweezers, razor (a value pack of double-blade no-moisturizer lasts a very long time if you shave 'dry' and hone the blades after). I clean the comb & hairbrush in hot water with washing soda to remove sebum (hair grease) buildup.
Seems there is wide variation from person to person in what works for body odor - vinegar works great for me as long as I shower daily. Some find baking soda or salt crystal works much better for them.
Going without toothpaste was inspired by my dental hygienist when I asked her about toothpaste recipes - she was anti-baking soda but said 'it really doesn't matter - it's all about the brushing' - 3 yrs later and 2 dentists (we moved) agree it's working fine for me. We do have fluoridated city water... Plus, no toothpaste means I rarely need chapstick, which I was a heavy user of even after going no-makeup. If I feel like I've had too much garlic and want to use a mouthwash, I gargle with a bit of my 'cleaning' vodka (works great on soap scum!) and spit it out. Then carefully exhale the fumes ;)
Sunblock, I wear a hat and, if warranted, gloves. I don't burn easily even though I have fair skin. Sunblocks that I have tried make me nauseas or give me a wicked headache.
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Apologies if these ideas have already been mentioned - I didn't read EVERY post but so far the replies sound awesome!
Here's what I do:
- I check out online makeup freebies (for me, in canada, this is www.smartcanucks.com)
- I cut my own bangs (practice makes perfect, and youtube videos are your friend)
- I host clothing swaps with friends and friends of friends! This has been a HUGE success, and I have been doing it every six months. It refreshes my wardrobe for free! If you don't have lady friends with wardrobes to make it possible, consider making it an event on meetup.com - that's what I did. I posted the event in the "Women Who Like to Have Fun for Free!" group. Your location will probably have a similar group, and if they don't - you can create one!
- Lingerie: I go once a year, and buy on boxing day! That is the only time of year that the prices are low enough to make this frivilous but awesome expense worth it for me. :)
- Pampering: I use groupons (www.groupon.com) and once in a blue moon they have a great pedicure deal or whatever. I also get my hair done at beauty schools (hit or miss results there!) and have stopped dying my hair, making peace with my natural colour.
I hope this helps! Such a great question!! Sounds like you're already doing a lot of awesome things.
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Inspired by this thread, here's what I've put in place over the last couple of weeks:
Like babysteps, I have "cranky" skin, and the lovely face cream I bought last month for 27 euros gave me eczema : ( !
I have ordered some essential oils, but while waiting, just went to the kitchen and have been using olive oil. I don't look like an olive (yet) and my eczema is slowly getting better.
Someone on the forum (and also in this thread) said to change the diet - I'd tried this before and couldn't stick with it. I'm not saying I'll be perfect now, but I've stopped sugar since last Sunday (not even a week) and already my skin has cleared up! This is frankly weird, it's so dramatic. Basically, I cut out bread (which in France is really a staple, and I ate a lot of it) and all things that are obviously sugary. This means that if there's hidden sugar or whatever - well too bad, I can't deal with being that strict, but this much I can handle. I was eating my tartines (bread) with confiture (jam) every morning, and now, it's a bowl of sugar-free muesli, for example. Also the dairy is gone, it's rice or soy milk.
Last thing, I do love good foundation. Like "Chanel". I mean, slap me, okay? Maybe my skin will soon look so amazing that I won't want it anymore. In any case, because I bought the essential oils, I don't have the budget for it this month. But - at my local Sephoras, they will give you a little container with a sample of whatever make-up you want, for FREE. This has kept me going for the past couple of weeks. Try it - it works (unless you sniff at my foundation habit, which in that case, get a perfume sample).
Thanks for all of your help, this has been a fun process of testing and trying new things.
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after having worn effectively no make up, nail varnish or jewellery for years i've just bought two nail polishes.
one of my cousins painted my nails a rainbow of colours and they made me smile when i was working. so i bought two lovely sunny shades. i am now remembering why i stopped painting my nails but it's a simple and cheap mood lift.
technically a backwards step i guess but i love them.
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I am proud to report that I haven't set foot or clicked into Sephora in 2013! Not that I haven't been tempted ... But I have resisted all the shiny things.
Instead I've been challenging myself to use the (ridiculous amount of) makeup I already have. There were items that I bought months ago and hadnt even tried yet, which just seems silly. I can have a lot of nights of drinking a glass of wine and playing with eyeshadow before I run out of options!
I always have dry skin in the winter, but this year I've been using some lovely argan oil on my skin as a moisturizer and it's lovely. My wintertime skin has never been so soft. I spritz my face with a little cold water, then massage in a few drops of oil around my eyes, on my forehead, and on my cheeks. The argan oil I have is from Sephora, but they sell it much more cheaply on Amazon. You can get a little bottle that will last 6-12 months for like $18.
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I was looking into getting DH a safety razor after reading about them in another thread. But now I want one!!!!
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I too have a nailpolish weakness...I love creative colors, but I know, very frivolous.
and I want to look into Argan oil now...
I am often in the Sephora, but I never buy anything. I love to spritz myself with perfume, fuss around, and leave...I'm not really tempted -it's all just so expensive - it's ridiculous. There are TWO Sephora stores practically right next to each other in my tiny town (why??) so I switch off.
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I was looking into getting DH a safety razor after reading about them in another thread. But now I want one!!!!
They are amazing! And super cheap to keep up after the initial purchase.
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Arbor33 - your first post was such a breath of fresh air to me - thanks.
All the posts before this one have been amazing to read.
The things I can't do without currently are:
-my bike commute to work M-F - it is so great getting out into the fresh air and huffing and puffing up the hills
-eating good lean protein complemented by a mostly full plate of natural food (ie fruit, veg, nuts & seeds)
-coconut oil - this stuff is amazing and has saved me from winter colds for the last two winters (drink), it's also great on skin
-getting good quality sleep
-waking up early (5am) to squeeze my studies, full time job and son in
-drinking lots of water
-catching up with friends
-going for walks
-using the library
-badger products for lips, hands and feet
Other stuff ...
Clothes: buy second hand, or on sale, and plan to visit the local thrift store
Shoes: a range of flats with the odd high heel. Purchase exercise shoes on sale or second hand new as exercise is important and good exercise shoes reduce injuries
Hair: shampoo/condition twice a week, this can fall to once a week when on holiday
Haircuts: I sometimes get a free cut for helping a friend with his cat; otherwise once every three months (still looking for a cheaper option)
Body hair: razors
Makeup: don't wear any to work; May use mascara and lip balm for special occasions
Adopting an MMM lifestyle has seen the following improvements:
-our yearly budget is under $24,000 - I could get this cheaper but child care is essential during school holidays. I could happily go without a car but haven't yet succeeded in talking my son into riding bikes to the supermarket. But I do this when my son's with his Dad.
-reduced our phone/internet bill from $156 per month for 1 smart mobile, 1 home line & 20g broadband to $100 per month for 50g broadband p/m and 1 smart mobile (honestly, I'm still disgusted by this but it's the cheapest to be found).
-using the bike a lot more, in fact MMM encouraged my commute to work and this happens 5x each week (including winter).
-started learning about bike maintenance.
-don't eat take aways.
-turning the hot water cylinder off and turning it on twice a week (this is an experiment to see if we can reduce the electricity bill).
-turning power points and lights off when not in use. The electricity bill is now under $100 p/m, coming from over $150 p/m.
-making lunches for school and work 5x per week.
-we live in a good area, close to school and work, with public transport within walking distance.
-we keep in touch with friends by using viber on the mobile; and skype on the computer.
-mow the lawn (this has been beyond my girl nature but I accepted the challenge and it's actually quite a satisfying (but dirty) job.
-DIY around the house. This has been highly intimidating, but the internet is great for researching what's needed. I still use blokes for some jobs as some jobs are beyond my physical capabilities. (ie going up ladders is mind blowingly scary and something that has a mental block that seems quite impenetrable at this stage!). Also, blokes are used if I don't have time and while studying and working my time is quite limited! However, this isn't done without careful consideration of the dollars! Mostly I fall into house maintenance mode during the semester breaks!
-the car sits in the garage quite a lot, so I'm currently investigating $2000 cars - as the spare cash could go towards the mortgage (don't have one yet, but this will feature in the not too distant future.)
-no debt - pay credit card off regularly; paid for car with cash, pay for studies as I go (no student loans), no mortgage (yet!).
-put a lot of thought into the MMM lifestyle and have to say it makes a lot of sense.
Sorry this is so long, but it's lovely sharing with lovely lady staches who understand what it's like being a lady whilst aspiring to growing our staches!
Go well!
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I'm confused about all the people using coconut oil on their skin. It made me break out like crazy.
Am I the only one?
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I'm confused about all the people using coconut oil on their skin. It made me break out like crazy.
Am I the only one?
Nope, it did the same thing to me. And my skin never breaks out! The argan oil I use never had that effect, though, so I guess it's just an individual thing. And I do like coconut oil on my cuticles, and to eat by the spoonful.
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I'm confused about all the people using coconut oil on their skin. It made me break out like crazy.
Am I the only one?
Me too, we must be slightly allergic to it. Well, it doesn't make me break out exactly, instead it makes my skin chap badly. I can eat it with no problems though, so I don't know for sure.
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I made an appendix in my spreadsheet that tracks my finances just for "personal care." I love, love, love my makeup and nail polish so I went and found out what the "shelf" life is for different products and allow myself guilt free to buy 1 new of whatever it is when it's expiration is up. I immediately throw out the "old" stuff.
It feels a little wasteful especially things like mascara which I'm told you need to replace anywhere from every 3 weeks to 3 months (I've heard everything on this one.) I replace the mascara every 3 months. For me the most important part was just being aware and putting it into context. ie realizing I only really wear makeup to go to work or school.
On a side note, any chance we could start a lady stache category?
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This thread is amazing. So glad I found it!
First, the "bad" (i.e. what I USED to do and have now stopped doing).
In middle/high school I had terrible acne. Before seeing a dermatologist, I spend so much money on crappy makeup and things like Clearasil, Noxema, Clean n' Clear. You name it, I tried it. Same with acne meds - you name it, I was on it. When I was in college I was finally able to stop taking acne meds and instead went for the Proactive route. I don't use that anymore, but I'll cover that in a minute. I've spent a lot on makeup over the years as well, given that I had a pretty bad acne problem for a while. And for hair, I've tried every product under the sun to get my curly hair under control.
Current routines:
Face: I now only use Cetaphil cleanser and SPF moisturizer. My skin still gets a bit oily, so I'm curious about this oil cleanser that people are making. Would it make my skin more oily or make it healthier? I drink a lot of water and herbal tea, so I think this contributes heavily to a better complexion compared to when I was younger and drank a ton of diet pepsi.
Body: My mom is addicted to Bath and Body Works (and shopping in general), so I usually get free body wash and lotion a few times a year from her. I am actually not a fan of these products, but I'm not going to pass up free things. When I buy my own soap, I get bar soap from my local farmer's market and get an Aveeno-brand body lotion with SPF. In the summer I always use the Aveeno SPF since my skin is more exposed to the sun then.
Hair: I use the 365 brand (Whole Foods) shampoo and conditioner usually. I was experiencing very dry scalp recently and switching to a shampoo without sodium laurel sulfate has helped. Since I have curly hair it is better for me to only shampoo my hair every other day. I do condition every day, though. I'll occasionally get salon-quality shampoo and conditioner from my mother since she runs a beauty salon (we live 1,000 miles away from each other so I don't get these things often). She also cuts my hair when we see each other, so I don't spend any money on the salon. I used to go to the salon anyway, but stopped when I realized I could save around $200 a year if I just had my mom cut my hair! I also never used to dye my hair, but lately I've found it fun. Again, my mom does it, so it only costs me about $5 to buy the bottle of dye from the beauty supply store as my mom has the rest of the ingredients. I like my hair as it is, but for $5 every few months, it is worth it to me to change things up a bit.
Shaving: I wax my underarms, but I've only had to buy one kit over the past year and it cost $15. I use GiGi hemp wax. The wax isn't even half gone, so this should last me a few years! I have a razor for my legs and probably only go through 3-4 blades a year. I don't shave every day in the winter, but usually have to in the summer. Body hair is the bane of my existence! I once spent $1,000 on laser hair removal for my bikini area. I will never do that again, because the hair was never permanently removed. However, I don't regret getting it done because it did improve the amount of ingrown hairs I get on that area of my body. I hardly get any now and the frequency of hair is less than it used to be. But I've just accepted that I'm a hairy person and do what I can. A set of tweezers, razor, and hemp wax is working well for now. I am curious if an epilator would work on me, because that initial investment could save me money over time.
Make-Up: I use Bare Essentials products, but only have to buy powder and primer more than once a year. I use eye shadows for a long time and get every last ounce out of my mascara tube. I have had to wear makeup more often lately - usually 6 days a week because my jobs require me to look nice. I have to look nice at my 9-5 job and I also have to look nice as a waitress. I often have to touch up my make-up in between jobs, which means I use more. It sucks, but that is the way it is right now. I probably spend $100 on makeup a year, so perhaps I can bring this down a bit. I do have to use concealer on my undereyes, but I think I might switch to a cheaper brand.
Overall health: I drink lots of water and herbal tea. I also try to eat as many fruits and vegetables as I can and go light on the meat. I do eat quite a bit of grains as well, probably more than I should. I have a sweet tooth, but try not to go overboard. I don't have a car where I live, so I walk a lot. I take the bus to work and walk when the weather is nice. I am trying to decide if I want to get a bike - my old one was stolen, so I'm hesitant. I also do yoga at home via podcasts and YouTube. My main "beauty" weakness is massage. I LOVE massages. I would have one every week if I could afford it. I only get two a year right now, and that just doesn't feel like enough.
Shoes: The bad news here is I was born with bad feet. I was never one to wear super high-heels, but in the past few years I've discovered that I can't wear high heels at all and that even flats hurt. I recently went to the podiatrist because my feet were hurting every single day. I'll be getting custom insoles soon and I have a list of shoes that I can buy. I will have to buy high-quality shoes from now on, meaning I will have to spend more money. If I don't do this then I'll likely have to have surgery someday. So this is a necessary expense.
Clothes: I only buy clothes when I absolutely need them. My mom, the one addicted to shopping, picks me up things now and then and sends me gift cards to stores. While I would prefer she not do that, I've given up on trying to tell her I only shop at TJ Maxx or second-time stores. She has learned that buying me a TJ Maxx gift card is appreciated, so I end up buying a lot of clothes there. I have learned what works on my body, though, so I have a good set of black/brown work pants and skirts, and jeans for casual outings. I probably buy 1-2 new tops in the winter and summer since I wear out my clothes rather quickly. This, however, might have been due to the poor water quality in my old building. I moved a few months ago and noticed that my clothes don't take as much of a beating as they used to. I tend to buy solid colors and standard pieces since those don't go out of style. I also value comfort over anything. My friends used to tease me for that, but I think I'm the one who is going to be better off, financially in the long run :) I'm also the one person who still has clothes from high school...yeah...I was in high school 10 years ago. But nothing is wrong with this sweatshirt so why get rid of it? I recently just got rid of a pair of sweatpants from high school because the elastic was falling out. I was quite sad about that, actually!
Nails: I hate the feeling of nail polish or fake nails on my fingers, so I don't have to worry about that! I do enjoy pedicures, but it is something I can live without. I occasionally paint my toenails (in the summer only) and have 2 shades I use and have had for years. Can't remember the last time I bought nail polish.
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Note: if you are anti-consumerist this is a site that is devoted to "beauty" and thus has lots of ads for products.
If you are good at focusing just on the content, it's no worse than many other websites :)
That said, here is a link to a list (click on 'view gallery') of foods you can use as beauty products http://www.stylelist.com/view/skin-food-which-beauty-products-are-hiding-your-kitchen?ncid=wsc-dl-cards-readmore (http://www.stylelist.com/view/skin-food-which-beauty-products-are-hiding-your-kitchen?ncid=wsc-dl-cards-readmore)
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@babysteps: Thanks for the link! I never thought of cornstarch for face powder. But DUH - corn starch helps soak up the moisture in diaper rashes and makes greasy hair look ungreasy. I think I'll start mixing this in with my powder to make it last longer.
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@KatieSSS you're welcome.
I've also heard that corn starch makes good foot powder.
Plain talc (a mineral) has always worked fine for me for foot powder, so you might want to run the #s before switching. You'd think something you can eat would cost more than some fine-ground rock, but who knows!
As long as I scrub my feet daily and wear socks most days, I seem to have outgrown footpowder :)
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I'm confused about all the people using coconut oil on their skin. It made me break out like crazy.
Am I the only one?
I'm using 70% olive oil to 30% castor oil. So far so good and my skin is super sensitive. I will stay away from the coconut though, just in case. My sister just tried some cleanse/diet called Standard Process and her skin looks amazing (and she lost 15lbs but this was more about the cleanse then the diet). I'm not buying their product but i am trying the diet (fruit,veggies,water,fiber only). I'll keep you posted on if it works for me.
Because of this post I did buy the diva cup and the crystal rock deodorant. LOVE IT!!!!! So mad i didn't know about that before! Especially the DivaCup - I've had cramps for years and that took care of them immediately.
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I pretty much DIY all of my own beauty regimens and have changed over to using homemade beauty products and use Oil Cleansing Method on my face. I could really kick myself for spending money on all of these commercial beauty products I thought I needed for all those years. Grrr!
But, there are times when I like a little pampering and have found a great way to get these services just by bartering. My hairdresser owns her own shop that offers a variety of other spa services. Since I am a massage therapist by trade we have worked out a great barter: a massage in exchange for a haircut and color. I have also worked out several other barters for manicures, pedicures, and facials with some of the other staff there. It works out great for both sides of the barter, everyone's happy. Last year I probably received over $1500 in spa services for free...just by bartering my time.
I highly encourage the barter system for services if you have something to offer and you have the time, it's a great way to save money. You just don't have to barter mutual spa services, my hairdresser also barters with her accountant, web designer, marketing expert, floral designer (beautiful fresh flowers delivered weekly to the salon), a cake baker (fresh baked goods delivered to make available to clients), painter, plumber and repairman.
Now, if I didn't have the luxury of this great barter relationship I would just go back to DIYing my own beauty regimens, no worries.
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I'm excited to have found this thread. Love it.
I'm pretty low maintenance, I grew up with a mother who didn't really get into much of the girly primping, so I never really learned. It was actually a little intimidating when I met my future mother-in-law (beautician) and sisters-in-law (local beauty queens) for the first time, since I'd never been around half that stuff. I shouldn't have worried.
My morning routine is pretty minimal shower with whatever is on hand (only use shampoo if I've gotten actively sweaty since the last shower) shave with soap and water or just water in the shower. Face lotion with sunscreen, spf15 loose powder and mascara. I haven't really had a period since I started birth control, so I don't have a feminine hygeine product right now (which I had to admit at recent gathering when I friend needed a tampon.) I'm so glad I don't have to deal with that right now. Growing up, my sister and I shared a bathroom, and she would sometimes use them up, without me knowing. This led to a habit of hiding extra tampons around my room and in the car that persisted for years. I would forget and then find them in the weirdest places.
One thing I learned from an interaction with a friend is that attitude is everything, you don't actually have to be highly made up/richly dressed, you just need to 'read' made-up/richly dressed to the casual observer. This was in the year when we were on clinics and everyone was tired, I happened to compliment her one day on how nice she was looking and she laughed and said "it's the necklace." She was wearing a large brightly colored necklace, and admitted that she hadn't felt like showering or putting on makeup that morning, but had found that if she pulled back her hair and wore flashy accessories, no one ever noticed, and she would even get compliments. I personally can't stand having heavy accessories, but have found that a scarf or some larger than normal earring make me looked pulled together even when I'm feeling lazy.
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Ahoy, makeup-wearing lady staches!
I started using L'Oreal's BB cream thingie in January, and I loooove it. It has the consistency of a very loose lotion, and 1/2 dime-sized squeeze is all it takes for the day. They have different skin tones, but I think it all comes out as this black-flecked grey goop (I'm making it sound so good, I know), and it ~*magically*~ blends to your skin color. I had been using Bare Minerals powder, but the L'Oreal coverage is longer-lasting and more natural looking on me. Plus, it's cheaper and easier to find.
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I would suggest reading a book called "The Beauty Myth". It really opened up my eyes.
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Bumping this up to ask a random lady question: Bras!
I am in that situation where my bras are on their last legs. They have stretched out and no longer really hold the shape. I've always bought my bras at Victoria's Secret, but I'm not too happy with how they hold up and I'm looking for a better investment.
It would be a bonus if I could find a bra that doesn't show the lines on your back (aka "back fat"). I'm thin and I still have it!
So what is your go-to brand, ladies?
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Bumping this up to ask a random lady question: Bras!
I am in that situation where my bras are on their last legs. They have stretched out and no longer really hold the shape. I've always bought my bras at Victoria's Secret, but I'm not too happy with how they hold up and I'm looking for a better investment.
It would be a bonus if I could find a bra that doesn't show the lines on your back (aka "back fat"). I'm thin and I still have it!
So what is your go-to brand, ladies?
Panache or Freya, but they are the only ones I can find in store that carry 28 bands. If you are a 30 or above then there are more options.
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Katie: First, get yourself remeasured, so you can be absolutely sure you're in the right size. It's amazing how many women have no idea what size they really are, and the problem you mentioned - back fat issues (for want of a better term) is a sizing problem. Ironically enough, it's probably because your bras are stretched out. Since you mentioned being fairly thin, I'm going to guess that a refit will probably have you in a smaller band size and a larger cup size than you think.
Second, be prepared to try on A LOT of bras. You need to know what style works best for your shape. Just because a particular style comes in your size doesn't mean it's the bra for you. If they did, we wouldn't have so many different bras! Take note of the things that work for you - a thicker or thinner gore (the bit between the cups), the cut of the cup itself, the thickness of the wings - it all makes a difference.
Finally, if you want your bras to last, hand wash always and never ever (on pain of death I'm not even kidding) put them in the dryer. Buy bras that you need to fasten on the outermost hook when you first get it, so as the elastic loosens, you can just tighten it.
As for brands, I'm still a Victoria's Secret girl myself (they've done well enough over the years for me to feel no need to stray), and I understand that venturing beyond will put you squarely in investment territory, with some of the higher end brands running well over $100 a bra. I'll freely cop to my ignorance of the particulars of those more expensive bras, so I can't say if they would last longer or better (though I would certainly hope so).
Hope this helps!
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I had a very successful bra shopping experience at Nordstrom last year. They measured me, I told them what I didn't want (no crazy colors, no lace that shows through knits, and nothing over $40), and they just brought me what i asked for to try on. $20-$40 each is still pretty expensive, but I also have some cheaper ones from target (<$15 each) that are probably 5+ years old and are still wearable*.If you have the patience, you can find good ones at a good price.
*idefinitely do not wash them every wear, in fact I'm not sure I'm comfortable publicizing the length I go between washes, and they never go in the dryer. I figure showering regularly and letting bras air out between wears is good enough. They certainly don't stink and no one has ever complained, so it's one less load of laundry to worry about most weeks.
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dr. bronners soap, nature's gate shampoo/conditioner. shower at night. rinse my face in the a.m.and add a little nature's gate or oil of olay w/sunscreen lotion- that is my routine.
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Bumping this up to ask a random lady question: Bras!
I am in that situation where my bras are on their last legs. They have stretched out and no longer really hold the shape. I've always bought my bras at Victoria's Secret, but I'm not too happy with how they hold up and I'm looking for a better investment.
It would be a bonus if I could find a bra that doesn't show the lines on your back (aka "back fat"). I'm thin and I still have it!
So what is your go-to brand, ladies?
This post on APW was amazing: http://apracticalwedding.com/2013/04/find-bras-that-fit/
I swear by Freya and they're about $60-70 a pop. Totally worth it. YMMV though.
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In response to the bra question:
- If you have a Dillard's location close by - they occasionally have % of sales and you can find very good deals on high end bras. I like Wacoal.
- Gap Body bras are pretty nice and surprising comfortable.
- Loehmann's also sometimes has decent deals on bras and they will have % off sales.
Good luck!
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Follow up on the bra question: measure your rib cage right underneath your breasts. If it is anything less than 32, do not fall for the sales lady trying to put you in a 32 or higher (99% chance that's all they have in stock). The smallest rib cage "easily" available in the States is 28 although there is a Polish or British company that just started making 26s last year. You will have to search for these - either boutiques or online sites that carry Panache/Freya are a good place to start (both offer 28 bands at the most reasonable price point). Once you find something that fits Ebay can be a good resource. Also, don't underestimate the importance of properly fitting sports bras. The day I discovered under wire, fitted sports bras was amazing.
If you are lucky enough to be a 32-36 A-D then you have the world of Victoria's Secret and department stores available to you. Anything outside of that and you will have to put in some effort. In my personal opinion the reduced back pain, confidence, and fit is worth the effort and extra money. Bras tend to be my soapbox . . . .
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Bras are one area where I find I have to spend a decent amount of money to get a good result. I wear Primadonna bras because the engineering in them is fantastic and I am quite a busty lady -- like, in the middle of the alphabet as a cup size!
They are usually upwards of $100 each, but I know my size and the styles that work on me, and I'm not too picky about color, so I can usually end up getting them for $50-60.
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Thanks for the great suggestions! I'm going to check out Freya for sure.
I've had TONS of bra fittings, and based on my rib cage size (34 or 36) they always try to put me in a C cup. And every single time I look at them and say, "no, I'm not a C" and they bring me those bras anyway. Then there is this moment where I put on the bra and open the door to the fitting room and the salesperson goes "oh...yeah, you aren't a C." What gave you that idea? The gaping space between my actual breasts and the fabric of the bra? Seriously, every time I waste so much time trying to convince them I'm not a C. The size I currently wear is either 36 A or 34 B. The issue is I have a wide ribcage, but small breasts.
And as far as the bra being tight enough around, that is EXACTLY what gives me that "back fat" look. I feel like my main problem is having a bra that is tight enough to support me, but not so tight that it creates back fat.
Le sigh...I think I'll have to spend considerable amount of time shopping, something I absolutely hate!
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Bumping this up to ask a random lady question: Bras!
I am in that situation where my bras are on their last legs. They have stretched out and no longer really hold the shape. I've always bought my bras at Victoria's Secret, but I'm not too happy with how they hold up and I'm looking for a better investment.
It would be a bonus if I could find a bra that doesn't show the lines on your back (aka "back fat"). I'm thin and I still have it!
So what is your go-to brand, ladies?
This post on APW was amazing: http://apracticalwedding.com/2013/04/find-bras-that-fit/
I swear by Freya and they're about $60-70 a pop. Totally worth it. YMMV though.
That post was REALLY helpful, thank you! I've got the name of a specialty store in DC which isn't too hard for me to get to. I also might venture to a Nordstrom's Rack during lunch today since several people have mentioned Nordstrom's as a good place to go for bras. I can at least try on some sizes and make notes as to what I like and don't like.
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That post was REALLY helpful, thank you! I've got the name of a specialty store in DC which isn't too hard for me to get to. I also might venture to a Nordstrom's Rack during lunch today since several people have mentioned Nordstrom's as a good place to go for bras. I can at least try on some sizes and make notes as to what I like and don't like.
Go to Nordstrom and get measured and figure out your correct size and then check out Nordstrom Rack for the deals. They won't measure you at the Rack, but if you know how to tell it fits, then going to the Rack isn't a bad idea.
Having properly fitting bras is the most amazing thing ever!! :) I remember the first time I got fitted into a 28 instead of the 32s I'd been wearing. It was AMAZING!
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Oh boy bras are a friggin' pain here too ... OK anonymous site so... 32 E here.
Like Madgeylou I feel the investment's important, but I also find it annoying as heck. So I go to ebay, where they have, at least here where I live, very high-end bras for about 10€.
I am dreaming of one day getting "the operation". I could lose about 250 grams in each breast, and I think I'd just feel so much better. But it's 3000€ and I'm not quite big enough to get it reimbursed : (
it's on hold, maybe for my 50th birthday or something.
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That post was REALLY helpful, thank you! I've got the name of a specialty store in DC which isn't too hard for me to get to. I also might venture to a Nordstrom's Rack during lunch today since several people have mentioned Nordstrom's as a good place to go for bras. I can at least try on some sizes and make notes as to what I like and don't like.
Go to Nordstrom and get measured and figure out your correct size and then check out Nordstrom Rack for the deals. They won't measure you at the Rack, but if you know how to tell it fits, then going to the Rack isn't a bad idea.
Having properly fitting bras is the most amazing thing ever!! :) I remember the first time I got fitted into a 28 instead of the 32s I'd been wearing. It was AMAZING!
Over my lunch hour I went to Nordstrom's Rack and tried on a few sizes, ranging from 34A - 36C. Still not a C cup. Not a 34. I also determined that I like the spanx-like material because it gives less back-fat. However, it doesn't quite eliminate it. The 36B was really close, the only problem being where the strap sit and how it created back fat. Perhaps I need larger than a 36? Maybe I'll take a trip to Nordstrom's this weekend and get fitted. Could be a nice Saturday excursion!
ETA: The bra I liked the best at Nordstrom's Rack was only $25! So hopefully I can find my size and good style at Nordstrom's and then get them at the Rack for cheaper :)
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The 36B was really close, the only problem being where the strap sit and how it created back fat. Perhaps I need larger than a 36? Maybe I'll take a trip to Nordstrom's this weekend and get fitted. Could be a nice Saturday excursion!
ETA: The bra I liked the best at Nordstrom's Rack was only $25! So hopefully I can find my size and good style at Nordstrom's and then get them at the Rack for cheaper :)
It's actually the other way around - "back fat" is an indication that the bra band is too big. It's counter-intuitive, but that's the case. Seriously, take a measuring tape and figure out the dimension right under the breast. That number is your band size (in most bands). If it's an odd number you will be between the two. That's what a fitter will do for you, but at least with that number you can be knowledgeable about what they should be bringing you.
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The 36B was really close, the only problem being where the strap sit and how it created back fat. Perhaps I need larger than a 36? Maybe I'll take a trip to Nordstrom's this weekend and get fitted. Could be a nice Saturday excursion!
ETA: The bra I liked the best at Nordstrom's Rack was only $25! So hopefully I can find my size and good style at Nordstrom's and then get them at the Rack for cheaper :)
It's actually the other way around - "back fat" is an indication that the bra band is too big. It's counter-intuitive, but that's the case. Seriously, take a measuring tape and figure out the dimension right under the breast. That number is your band size (in most bands). If it's an odd number you will be between the two. That's what a fitter will do for you, but at least with that number you can be knowledgeable about what they should be bringing you.
Really? Then how come the "back fat" is worse in tighter bras? The tighter the band, the more the fat protrudes out the top! I wonder if it is more of a placement issue, like a thicker band would be better because it covers more area and "sits" better. I haven't measured myself in a while, but I'm pretty sure the last time I did it I was a 35. I'll do it again when I get home.
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The 36B was really close, the only problem being where the strap sit and how it created back fat. Perhaps I need larger than a 36? Maybe I'll take a trip to Nordstrom's this weekend and get fitted. Could be a nice Saturday excursion!
ETA: The bra I liked the best at Nordstrom's Rack was only $25! So hopefully I can find my size and good style at Nordstrom's and then get them at the Rack for cheaper :)
It's actually the other way around - "back fat" is an indication that the bra band is too big. It's counter-intuitive, but that's the case. Seriously, take a measuring tape and figure out the dimension right under the breast. That number is your band size (in most bands). If it's an odd number you will be between the two. That's what a fitter will do for you, but at least with that number you can be knowledgeable about what they should be bringing you.
Really? Then how come the "back fat" is worse in tighter bras? The tighter the band, the more the fat protrudes out the top! I wonder if it is more of a placement issue, like a thicker band would be better because it covers more area and "sits" better. I haven't measured myself in a while, but I'm pretty sure the last time I did it I was a 35. I'll do it again when I get home.
A properly fitting band should be parallel with the floor, generally back fat is caused by a band that is riding up (a sign that it is too big). Another thing to realize is that there will always be some back fat, just because of the contours of the body and where the elastic is hitting. I find that the thicker ones are better, but adjusting the placement is the biggest factor. Everyone's body is different though.
Over a period of wearing the wrong size, breast matter migrates to the side of the rib cage. If you make a point to pull the girls to the front when putting on the bra this should decrease over time, simultaneously reducing the appearance of back fat.
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The 36B was really close, the only problem being where the strap sit and how it created back fat. Perhaps I need larger than a 36? Maybe I'll take a trip to Nordstrom's this weekend and get fitted. Could be a nice Saturday excursion!
ETA: The bra I liked the best at Nordstrom's Rack was only $25! So hopefully I can find my size and good style at Nordstrom's and then get them at the Rack for cheaper :)
It's actually the other way around - "back fat" is an indication that the bra band is too big. It's counter-intuitive, but that's the case. Seriously, take a measuring tape and figure out the dimension right under the breast. That number is your band size (in most bands). If it's an odd number you will be between the two. That's what a fitter will do for you, but at least with that number you can be knowledgeable about what they should be bringing you.
Really? Then how come the "back fat" is worse in tighter bras? The tighter the band, the more the fat protrudes out the top! I wonder if it is more of a placement issue, like a thicker band would be better because it covers more area and "sits" better. I haven't measured myself in a while, but I'm pretty sure the last time I did it I was a 35. I'll do it again when I get home.
A properly fitting band should be parallel with the floor, generally back fat is caused by a band that is riding up (a sign that it is too big). Another thing to realize is that there will always be some back fat, just because of the contours of the body and where the elastic is hitting. I find that the thicker ones are better, but adjusting the placement is the biggest factor. Everyone's body is different though.
Over a period of wearing the wrong size, breast matter migrates to the side of the rib cage. If you make a point to pull the girls to the front when putting on the bra this should decrease over time, simultaneously reducing the appearance of back fat.
Interesting. For as long as I can remember, the girls have been more to the side than to the front. It has been a running joke that I can fit a hand between the two and that I cannot create cleavage - EVER. My guess is I am just naturally this way, but having a bad bra fit isn't helping.
Does anyone else immediately take their bra off when they get home? I do! I would go bra-less if I could.
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I am the opposite - I wish I could have a permanent bra built onto my body so my "girls" would never move and flop around, EVER. They are big and hot and I want them in a nice tight package out of my WAY.
Interesting topic, LOL.
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Does anyone else immediately take their bra off when they get home? I do! I would go bra-less if I could.
First thing I do when I get home, most days! I also hate wearing shoes. It's so hard for bras to stay fitting right, so I usually only have ~2 that fit perfectly at any given time and then another 4 that are okay.
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Turns out you all were right about the band size! I was wearing a 36 and I really should be a 32! I got a fitting this weekend and came home with two extremely comfortable bras. The brands are Spanx and Natori. Now that I know which bras work for me, I'll be able to shop at Nordstrom's rack and get them for half the price in the future!
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Turns out you all were right about the band size! I was wearing a 36 and I really should be a 32! I got a fitting this weekend and came home with two extremely comfortable bras. The brands are Spanx and Natori. Now that I know which bras work for me, I'll be able to shop at Nordstrom's rack and get them for half the price in the future!
Woohoo! Isn't that the best feeling ever? :)
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I also just found out around a year ago that I was wearing the wrong size bra. Last time I got measured (several years ago) I was told by the fitter that I was a 36AA. This was based on having a 30.5" underbust measurement and 35" overbust (I'm pretty flat chested). This is because of some weird rule where you round up to the nearest inch, then add 4 inches if it is an even number, or 5 inches if it is an odd number, to get the band size.
36AA is not an easy size to find, and I always immediately wore them in the tightest hook setting and could get 2 hands under the band, which should have set alarm bells ringing. I'm now wearing 32B bras which fit a lot better, and helpfully are a slightly more common size so easier to find. I tried a 30" band but it was just too tight. And it turns out that since my upper back posture has improved from doing Cross Fit, my underbust measurement has expanded and is now closer to 32" anyway. Who knew slouching was part of the problem?
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It also took my years to find the right bra. I'm just exceptionally lucky that "the right bra" for me costs less than $10 from the children's section of either Walmart or Target. Sometimes it's good to be tiny and flat chested!
Once I found this pearl of wisdom, I had friends ask me quietly if my chest was larger. It wasn't, just supported correctly for the first time ever.
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I also just found out around a year ago that I was wearing the wrong size bra. Last time I got measured (several years ago) I was told by the fitter that I was a 36AA. This was based on having a 30.5" underbust measurement and 35" overbust (I'm pretty flat chested). This is because of some weird rule where you round up to the nearest inch, then add 4 inches if it is an even number, or 5 inches if it is an odd number, to get the band size.
It's supposed to be that the underbust measurement is the band size, and the difference between the overbust and underbust gives you the cup size - A is one inch, B is two, etc.
36AA is not an easy size to find, and I always immediately wore them in the tightest hook setting and could get 2 hands under the band, which should have set alarm bells ringing. I'm now wearing 32B bras which fit a lot better, and helpfully are a slightly more common size so easier to find. I tried a 30" band but it was just too tight. And it turns out that since my upper back posture has improved from doing Cross Fit, my underbust measurement has expanded and is now closer to 32" anyway. Who knew slouching was part of the problem?
Oh lordie, I'm cringing at the very thought! I know/think way too much about bras.
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It's supposed to be that the underbust measurement is the band size, and the difference between the overbust and underbust gives you the cup size - A is one inch, B is two, etc.
36AA is not an easy size to find, and I always immediately wore them in the tightest hook setting and could get 2 hands under the band, which should have set alarm bells ringing. I'm now wearing 32B bras which fit a lot better, and helpfully are a slightly more common size so easier to find. I tried a 30" band but it was just too tight. And it turns out that since my upper back posture has improved from doing Cross Fit, my underbust measurement has expanded and is now closer to 32" anyway. Who knew slouching was part of the problem?
Oh lordie, I'm cringing at the very thought! I know/think way too much about bras.
I think if I had a larger bust I would have been more sceptical. But I just thought I was freakishly flat chested and that no bras were designed to fit my size as it would be too niche a market :-/ And I didn't get back pain (except some I put down to my hunched posture) or any real problems (except some uncomfortable movement when doing high impact sports) and I think because I don't have much to support the straps did manage to handle a lot of the support. I was pretty pleasantly surprised by the difference switching to the smaller band size made though :-)
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Bras are the WORST! I have to go buy some new ones and I am not looking forward to it. Because I need at least a 32DD and possibly a 32E. Ugh.
Oddly enough, I saw some good bra advice from the lady who runs CakeWrecks. Check it out here: http://www.epbot.com/2013/04/everything-you-never-knew-you-needed-to.html
Another (non) bonus of bra shopping for the full-busted lady: the bras are FUCKING EXPENSIVE. I know that a good bra is really awesome and necessary, but I still cringe at having to pay $50+ for underwear.
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Another (non) bonus of bra shopping for the full-busted lady: the bras are FUCKING EXPENSIVE. I know that a good bra is really awesome and necessary, but I still cringe at having to pay $50+ for underwear.
Be glad you don't live in Canada! The import taxes are worse than in the US, so I was paying $90-130 with taxes for the same bras that I pay $50-70 for in the US.
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I used to have an extremely difficult time finding affordable bras. That changed a while back, not because I found a good brand but I because lost 25 pounds (thanks in part to a more active Mustachian lifestyle). Then it became shockingly easy to find bras that fit ~just right~. Another reason to walk/bike everywhere, really.
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Ive instituted a few changes since I've become more committed to achieving FI. I have high standards about how l look (you only live once, and I want to enjoy what I have while I still have it, and I also need to look polished and pulled together for my job) and I'm saving a ton of money but think I still look the same as when I was spending a lot.
I've switched from department store make-up to drug store make-up with no problems.
I cut my hair myself. This is not as grim as it sounds! I usually wind up doing this when I move because I don't feel like finding a new stylist, but now I'm doing it to save money. My hair is wavy and kind of long, and every once in a while I trim my bangs. I don't think it looked any better when I would go to a stylist- it was really more for the pampering. I don't color my hair, but if I wanted to I would do it myself. I used to when I was a (poor!) student and I think it looked fine. i didn't do anything complicated though, just the semi-permanent rinse type. I don't use any products beyond shampoo and conditioner.
I am 2 months into a pledge to not buy any clothes for a year. It has been super easy so far. I have plenty of clothes, really nice ones, and even in several sizes if I go up or down a bit!
I've started doing my own pedicures. This one I'm really not so sure about. I live in a warm climate and my feet are out every day and I need to look pulled together for work. I might alternate doing it myself with getting them done professionally.
Tweeze my eyebrows myself instead of getting them waxed.
This one I feel really strongly about. If you have good health insurance, just go to a dermatologist for any skin issues, instead of trying different products. If an over the counter product doesn't work, trying 2 or 3 or 4 more over the counter things probably won't work either. I'm done wasting $ on things that don't work. And we all to get a yearly skin cancer check anyway, might as well talk about your other issues while you're there. And I'm not into the facials either. They were fun for pampering, but for me the results were negligible. I have had good results from chemical peels, but am not into spending that money right now. I also had fantastic results from Botox- not for my looks, I thought I looked exactly the same with it, but my daily headaches went away 100%. This was life changing for me. After 3 rounds, the Botox wore off a few months ago and the headaches are mostly still gone. I think those muscles got out of the habit of clenching when I was stressed and haven't started again. It's not cheap, but I would spend a few hundred again if the pain started up again (and no, my insurance won't cover it)
And working out, eating right and sleeping enough is HUGE. Working out is what makes the clothes look good, and diet and sleep take care of the skin! After a few weeks/months of green smoothies I see a big difference in my skin.
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On the topic of bras - I'll confess to being a 36D, and I've been wearing Vanity Fair brand from Macy's for years. Those bras (for me) have been bulletproof, and Macy's always coupons/sales. I think I pay on average $15 for a bra there, and it will last a few years.
Love this thread, btw!! There should be a special place for the lady 'staches to congregate :)
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Rollie I love that idea, separate category!
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Great thread. I noticed a couple of people mentioned "sugaring" instead of waxing. I do this, and it has changed my life! Ok, maybe a slight exaggeration ;) but I would absolutely recommend it for hair removal! I have been waxing for half my life - I used to get it professionally done, then I moved to "veet" (tried Nads and other brands as well) which seemed to get more useless every time I used it but cheaper than going to a beautician.....
Then I discover sugaring - it is seriously cheap to make (2 cups sugar, 1/4 cup lemon juice, 1/4 cup water) and seriously quick and easy to make (especially if you have a candy thermometer). It is also a lot more gentle on your skin - It definitely takes away the dead skin but doesn't rip off healthy skin the way normal waxing seems to. My skin has been a lot less dry and in better condition since I started sugaring. I use it on my lower legs (don't need to wax my thighs), under arms and bikini line.
A few other benefits - it doesn't seem to hurt as much as regular waxing (although not pain free), and apparently it only pulls the hairs out NOT your skin.... My legs actually haven't looked so smooth in years. As it is water soluble, it wipes off very easily - no more stuff getting stuck to you after you have finished ;). I also seem to get way less ingrown hairs than waxing...
Anyway, here is the recipe I used, I also include the links I looked at to get some more background info:
Used this recipe and directions:
http://tipnut.com/body-sugaring/
Some notes:
-This also works with grapefruit juice (I ran out of lemons once)
-For the cotton strips, I cut up an old bed sheet - you can customise the sizes. I found smaller pieces worked better for the bikini line
I found it useful to:
-Lay out a towel to sit on and protect the floor from the mixture (it's quite sticky)
-Have a damp hand-towel with me to clean my hands and the knife I used to spread the mixture on my legs. This stopped everything getting too sticky as I went along (as the mixture is water soluble it easily wiped off - unlike wax!)
-The recipes seem to conflict on which way you should spread the wax and cotton strips and pull them off. The method I use is to spread the wax in the OPPOSITE direction of the hair growth, smooth the strips on in the OPPOSITE direction of hair growth as well. To pull the strips off I would pull them in the SAME DIRECTION as the hair growth. This worked perfectly, and apparently is part of the reason for less pain, less redness and less red bumps
Some other links that I found useful:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sugaring_%28epilation%29
This is a video that seems to show the original way to do it, but I didn't have the slab of marble to cool it down ;) - and the metal kitchen bench didn't work for me :):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WoS1uuddqcM&feature=related
Also here is another video tutorial with the recipe I used, good as you can see the colour it should be etc...:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7v-p8pW07iE
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Shaving: I find it interesting that so many lady staches are shaving often/at all. Don't get me wrong, I realize there is some unwritten code that says we (in the US or globally?) are supposed to spend part of our lives and money shaving lots of areas of the body. It was only after I had my son, when I didn't feel like I had the time or energy, that I started cutting out shaving my legs. Laziness? Yes. Time saved? Yes. Money saved? Yes. Sounds like a homerun to me! My husband is German, so he never understood why I shaved all the time anyway (so apparently those efforts were wasted on him!). Now I hardly ever shave and I don't feel any differently. Okay, I don't want gawkers either...so if I am going to a wedding or something and I'm not wearing dark hose, then I will whip out the old razor and shave using basic body soap. That means I may never have to buy a razor again (the one should last me a long time if I only use it once or twice a year??). Ironically, I am in Germany now and my husband's family invited us to go swimming last week. I wondered then whether it was my husband not caring about shaving or the entire culture (which I had thought in the past was so open). I shaved just to be safe, dare I embarass his family. Well, it turns out that all the young Germans are also shaving...nary a body hair in sight. Makes me think though...shaving is not necessary and costs something, so isn't it anti-Mustachian to continue doing so?? I'm trying to start a movement here...please join in!!
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Back on the topic of bras, if you're young:
Your bra might be making your boobs saggier. (http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/259073.php)
There are some places I can't get away with going bra-less (I'm a nanny... I don't want any sideways looks from people thinking I look inappropriate with kids around....), but I go bra less when I can! (Hah, I feel a little uncomfortable saying that in a public forum, but buying fewer bras would certainly save someone money...) If I had huge boobs I might be uncomfortable, but at my moderate size (34D) it's definitely more comfortable without! If I'm going somewhere that I think will be cold though, I put one on to stay decent. ;)
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Lady 'Staches. . . . . explore letting your hair go silver, naturally.
I'm 44 and colored my dark brown hair from age 28 until age 43 -- EVERY THREE WEEKS in order to fight the premature silver hair (thanks, Mom). Because it was really hard to get the color even and avoid a reverse-skunk look, I had to get a salon-color every other time at a cost of about $80 (including tip). So, every 6 weeks for 15 years, I was plunking down $80 rather than learn to love my silver.
Shortly after turning 43, I had a long business trip to South Africa and I seriously contemplated packing dye in my suitcase. It was the image of me with my head in the hotel sink rinsing it out that made me realize I had to get off the crack. My last color was Dec. 18, 2011. The grow-out was really hard, I won't lie. I spent about 9 months moaning about my hair to my best friends (saints, really). I joined the Facebook groups "Grey and Proud" and "Going Grey, Looking Great." It was shoulder length when I started and I chopped it really short in March 2012 (see the pic). I started letting it grow out in June.
Now, it is down to my ears and a beautiful platinum in the front with some near-black "pepper" through my crown. My hair has more "dimension" than any color/ highlight/ lowlight scheme could ever create. I get compliments on it constantly, which never happened with brown hair. People remember me because I am often the only woman with silver hair (even when I'm in a crowd of OLDER women).
What's better? In April 2012 (right after the pic was taken), I had a job interview with a huge law firm (yes, I'm a lawyer). My hair was still dark at the tips and silver elsewhere. I got the job. My hair never held me back. I'll post another picture later on showing my current length. The key is to keep a great, modern, slightly edgy cut. All the problems I had with dry hair, flaky scalp, dandruff etc are gone and my curls and soft and healthy. THAT is sexy.
The moral to the story is do not assume that you have to cover your gray. Maybe you do (not everyone grays evenly or nicely) but maybe not. And, it's not necessarily gray. Mine is a mix of platinum, steel, and silver. Take that, Clairol!
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Does anyone else immediately take their bra off when they get home? I do! I would go bra-less if I could.
First thing I do when I get home, most days! I also hate wearing shoes. It's so hard for bras to stay fitting right, so I usually only have ~2 that fit perfectly at any given time and then another 4 that are okay.
I hate wearing a bra soooo much! I just want to retire so I can walk around bra free all the time.
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Lady 'Staches. . . . . explore letting your hair go silver, naturally.
That's awesome! Your hair looks great! I have thought about doing this but I haven't gotten "there" mentally yet. I do have a great barter system with my beautician since I am a massage therapist (we barter cut/color for a 1 hr massage). But, I have often wondered what would I do if we stopped bartering, it's been so long since I have paid to have my hair done. I am thinking going au natural if that happens, thanks for paving the way!
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Lady 'Staches. . . . . explore letting your hair go silver, naturally.
I have thought about doing this but I haven't gotten "there" mentally yet. I do have a great barter system with my beautician
It took me two tries to get "there." When I turned 42, I tried freeing myself from color (what a waste of time, too!) but after about 9 weeks of regrowth and looking ratty I landed a phenomenal opportunity to attend a United Nations meeting on climate change. Of course, that started me coloring again -- my hair didn't have enough regrowth to chop but had too much to look good.
It took me another year to work up the nerve. Plus, my daughter was training to be a stylist and I had all the free cuts and color I wanted from 2009 to 2011. When she moved too far away and I had my South African epiphany, I knew it was time to try again.
It's a very personal decision and wasn't an easy one for me. I still have days when I wish my hair was dark, like when I was younger. I just don't want it to the point of wasting hours of my life in a stylist's chair and shelling out all that money! That time and money are better leveraged toward FI and my inner growth and peace with being beautiful and healthy at the age I am now.
As a side note, I've been single (divorced) since 2003, with only a short-term boyfriend or two to break a loooonnnng stretch of single-motherhood and law school. When I decided to commit to going silver, one of my biggest concerns was whether men would find it attractive. After all, it sure can be hard to meet a quality person and I didn't want to put another barrier in play!
Almost universally, men LOVE my hair -- except the more shallow men who are looking for arm candy and I don't want their attention anyway so my hair is a great "tool filter." It's eye catching and different, which they seem to read as "she's confident in herself." I've gotten more attention than before - maybe I'm more approachable? Hmmm. Anyway, I'm now 5 months into a relationship with a wonderful man and he'd be very disappointed if I colored my hair.
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Shaving -- I used a LivingSocial coupon for laser hair removal (nose to toes, $500). Worth every dime. I hardly ever shave anymore -- just a few times a year.
BC & menstrual stuff -- I recently got my third Mirena IUD. I got the first at 35. The second at 40 and just got the third one last month. It's completely covered by insurance -- not even a copay. It's been in use in Europe for decades and in the US for a little less time than that. It emits trace amounts of hormones right to the uterine wall so many users get very light or no period. I haven't bought tampons/ pads in ten years. Woo hoo!
Oils & body butters -- I use coconut and/ or argan oil on my hair, face, and skin. My naturally curly hair absolutely loves this -- every day. Here's a great website for inexpensive products. http://www.butters-n-bars.com/ (http://www.butters-n-bars.com/)
Makeup -- Until recently I wore Clinique and a fair amount of it (foundation, blush, mascara, eye shadow, brow powder, eyeliner, lipstick -- wow, didn't realize how much until I typed that!). Now that I'm biking to work this just doesn't seem to matter. Today I have a little foundation on and the brow powder (love my dark brows in contrast to my silver hair). This blog is changing my perception of what matters.
Bras -- the Maidenform outlet is great. I recently got 4 bras for $32 (but them I'm a common size). Nothing is matchy-matchy but really, who cares?
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Lady 'Staches. . . . . explore letting your hair go silver, naturally.
Your hair looks fantastic! :-) My Mum dyed her hair for decades, from her mid 20s when she started going grey. It was a home dye job and our relatives used to tease her about having tartan hair. The grey bits would go a different shade than the hair that was still dark, and sometimes looked orange rather than brown!
I inherited the genes for going grey early and got my first grey hairs aged 24. I got my hair dyed from age 31 - 34 because I worked at a College which taught hairdressing (amongst other things) so got it done pretty cheaply and conveniently. Once I had started, I did find the upkeep annoying but it was hard to leave it to grow out again. I changed jobs and haven't dyed my hair in over a year. There are still some highlights at the ends, but it is mostly back to natural. My hair is going grey very unevenly, mostly around the front in blocks, underneath the top layer of hair. It looks like I have some silver highlights but it is rather uneven and a bit odd looking. I might post a picture if I get round to transferring then from my camera. It's also something that gives away my age (I look young for my age otherwise, sometime still getting asked for ID when purchasing alcohol). There was a woman I used to work beside who had a beautiful head of shiny white hair and a youthful face and complexion and she looked great! I'd have no qualms at all about my hair if it were like that.
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See photo of my greying hair.
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It wasn't until I explored letting my hair go grey that I realized how significant our hair is to our sense of self and beauty. Ann Kreamer wrote a lovely book that I highly recommend. http://www.annekreamer.com/going-gray (http://www.annekreamer.com/going-gray)
The reality is that, especially for home dye jobs, it can be very hard to get a natural looking color. As I shifted from dye to grey, I also suddenly realized that my dye job was a crutch. It was an easy way to look young. As I became more grey, I also became more determined to be active and naturally sexy the way only a person who is comfortable in her strong & healthy body can be. In short, I stepped up my game once I didn't have dark hair to hide behind.
Here's a picture from last month -- me and my son at his promotion to ensign in NJROTC. I plan on growing my curls into long layers, shoulder length. This pic shows all the various shades of salt and pepper in my natural hair. I'm 44 and started going gray at 19.
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I'm gray and definitely happier that way. My students listen to me better, as do coworkers. Plus I don't have to mess around with it, which is my primary hair requirement. I keep it in a bob between chin and shoulder length because all i have to do is comb it after the shower. It's dry and looks good by the time I get to work.
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i haven't colored my hair, and it's gradually gone from light brown to silver. i get compliments all the time on my hair color. i think it makes a difference that i'm fairly fit, active, smiling, and have a bit of tan--nice contrast. i wear tinted lip balm, and i think the lip color helps, too. if i'm feeling 'grey' i can rub a bit of the tinted lip balm on my cheeks to brighten me up.
regarding bras, i buy mine online at hanes.com which has great sales on bali and other popular brands. identify your size in a certain brand and style, and you can get them cheap. i also hit ross and try on off-brands/styles for some real bargains. i am large busted and love removing my bra each evening, no matter the size/fit! such a relief!
occasionally i wear make-up which i buy at target or kmart. one eyeliner, one bb cream, one mascara, and the tinted lip balm for lips and cheeks and i'm fine for a few years. i do have some real lipstick my sister gave me for my birthday, which i use when i want the color to last longer without touch-ups.
staying healthy is the best thing we can do to enhance our beauty, so lots of fruits and veggies, water, walking, etc really make the difference in how i look and feel. i've noticed men take an interest in me when i've just been exercising--glowing i guess!
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"I've started doing my own pedicures. This one I'm really not so sure about. I live in a warm climate and my feet are out every day and I need to look pulled together for work. I might alternate doing it myself with getting them done professionally."
I just wanted to share my experience in DIY nails! I was terrible at it my whole life (hippie parents, tomboy) and in grad school I started to try getting better. Now I do my fingernails about once a week and my toes every 2-3 weeks. I live in Austin, so it's sandal season all year round. The key to my success is Sally Hansen base coat and the InstaDri top coat that comes in the red bottle. They're maybe $5 each and last for months. I've tried tons of other ones and this topcoat actually dries fast enough that I don't mess up the nails and it makes the polish last a really long time--at least a week before I start getting chips. The base coat and top coat are total game changers and are better quality than what they use at salons--they NEVER use good top coats in my experience and the manis last less than a week. I'm a fan of Sally Hansen and Revlon polishes primarily (my grocery store often has coupons for them, but I see polish as a cheap treat once a month or so) but with the SH base and top coat I find even cheapo polishes like NYC Color and Wet n Wild last for ages.
I do nails as a self care activity, instead of thinking of it as a 'chore' or a beauty routine--I watch some TV or old episodes of 'Roseanne' on DVD and block everybody out for 2 hours til the nails are dry.
I also color my hair with henna, which I buy from mehandi.com, that costs about $3/shot. It lasts for about 6 weeks before the roots start to show and doesn't fade or get messed up in pool water (Austin--pool weather all year round). My hair is naturally a kind of meh dark blonde/light brown so it takes the Henna color really well. People comment on it all the time and ask about it constantly. I do it at home and it's kind of a process but if you're interested in red hair, henna is the jam. If you want more deets on how I do it, let me know!
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I am constantly tempted by pretty lady trappings (make up, clothes, perfume, do dads for my house) but in an attempt to take debt reduction and savings to the next level have been doing a few things that over time I think will help (and hopefully you too):
In the spirit of "spend nothing week or month", I am using up all the stuff I already have-it's going to take more than a month for sure! Probably more like a year for some things. I have lots of open bottles of lotion, shampoo, etc and more in the linen closet. Yes they were a good deal but not if I never use them and keep buying more.
I have been trying to substitute rather than buy-I have been using a bit of baby oil in place of spray on furniture wax or cleaner like "Pledge" on my wood furniture. Corn starch mixed with bronzing powder for loose face powder, mixing baby oil with some cheaper lotions for more "oomph".
I am trying to be realistic about my hair. It doesn't do certain things--no matter what chemicals or appliances I use on it. I keep it simple and long--up for work, and down on my time. Every time I think someone can force it into my vision I end up having to grow it out for two years or more while I cut off the damaged portions!
Unearth the hidden gems-I have tons of nice clothes but they don't all get worn. Some things get pushed to the back of the closet because they need ironing, a button replaced, or are hard to match. The ONLY new (new to me from the thrift store) items of clothing I am buying are pieces which will match an existing but unmatched piece I already have. That goes for shoes too. If something is super pretty, I will iron it, but if it's just so-so-I get rid of it.
Perfume breeds on my dresser at night. I get it for Xmas, birthdays, etc. I love it but there is only so much you can use! If it's the cheapy stuff I wouldn't usually wear-I still use it as air freshener, to make sachets, or spritz lightly on the linens.
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There have been Mustachian discussions on when it is better to pay more upfront for the sake of quality or longevity. As far as I am concerned, it is worth it to me to go to a bra shop and pay more for a proper fit. I use to buy bras at Kohls. I found brands and sizes that fit but the next time around the styles were no longer available or did not fit me properly anymore. Going in and out of the dressing room with different brands of bras that all seem to fit differently requires more time than I want to commit. At my bra shop, I tell the clerk what I want and she brings me a bra to try. Some women might be uncomfortable having someone else in the dressing room to make adjustments to straps but it doesn't bother me.
I even bought a new swim suit at my bra shop. They have tankinis with cup sizes so I have a proper fit. If I were swimming primarily in chlorinated water, I would not make the investment in a pricey suit but I usually swim in salt water.
Shoes are another thing that I would rather spend some money on upfront for the sake of longevity and comfort. I have minimal arches and require more support than I usually find in cheap shoes. For me, Chaco sandals are worth the money. They wear well and can be tossed in the washer when stinky. And you can send the sandals back to the company for sole replacement.
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I love the grey haired lady pics that you have all posted! I too started going grey around 22 or so, but I have not dared to go natural yet. I did however, as a direct result of this board, find someone on craigslist to do my hair for free as a hair model, so I am scheduled for a cut and color next week. I am crossing my fingers that it works out....so nervous! I keep telling myself it's only hair and I am being vain...it can be fixed or it will grow out.
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Hi Ladies,
I am 20 years old and I have very sensitive skin and shampoo and conditioners often make my head itch. About two years ago I heard that you could substitute baking soda and water for shampoo and watered down apple cider vinegar for conditioner. This has worked out wonderfully for me, my hair looks and feels great! Plus, I have started adding a drop of lavender or tea tree oil to the vinegar which is a great way to get a nice fresh smell :)
I was hoping to get some advice from you gals on a problem I have been having with one of my good friends. My friend is not at all mustachian and is not very open minded about it. Anyway, she often wants to go get manicures or go clothes shopping with me and is offended when I would prefer not to. I try to explain that I would love to do stuff with her that doesn't cost money but she tends to assume I am blowing her off. I am not at all good at conflict resolution and am not sure how to handle the situation.
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Hi Ladies,
I am 20 years old and I have very sensitive skin and shampoo and conditioners often make my head itch. About two years ago I heard that you could substitute baking soda and water for shampoo and watered down apple cider vinegar for conditioner. This has worked out wonderfully for me, my hair looks and feels great! Plus, I have started adding a drop of lavender or tea tree oil to the vinegar which is a great way to get a nice fresh smell :)
I was hoping to get some advice from you gals on a problem I have been having with one of my good friends. My friend is not at all mustachian and is not very open minded about it. Anyway, she often wants to go get manicures or go clothes shopping with me and is offended when I would prefer not to. I try to explain that I would love to do stuff with her that doesn't cost money but she tends to assume I am blowing her off. I am not at all good at conflict resolution and am not sure how to handle the situation.
Maybe instead of saying "I prefer not to", try."Sorry, I don't have the budget for that this month. Maybe we can do _____ instead?"
People are usually more receptive to that kind of phrasing. And if your friend still gets offended and thinks you're really just using frugality as an excuse to blow her off, well... Time to find some new friends.
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Hi Ladies,
I've really enjoyed reading through this thread.
Here is my situation. There's some good and some bad.
Starting with the good:
Like a lot of people above me in the thread I think exercise/good diet are important. I have sensitive skin and so use the skin care products that my doctor recommended which are cheap ones from the drugstore. For make-up, I just use concealer.
Clothes for home come from Value Village - an excellent thrift shop in Canada. Office clothes sometimes come from there or if I need to I got to the mall, make a strategic strike and get the hell out as fast as I can.
My close friends are non-spendy. We go for walks, visit over tea or go for inexpensive lunches.
Now the not-so-good:
I have my hair done (cut and colour) at a salon every 6 weeks for $100.00. this is $75.00 per month for hair. It comes in quite grey on the top of my head and I have it coloured a dark brown - my natural colour when I was younger. (I am 49 now)
Right now I am between jobs - I have a 2-month contract position starting on Tuesday and after that unless I get a longer contract, I will look for a permanent job. This means interviews so I think I will keep with the program for now until my work situation is sorted out. I've had some great suggestions in response to this dilemma from my journal post. One of them was to do my own root touch ups and exchange hair cuts with a friend. I do have a friend I could talk to about this when she's back from overseas. Also, looking into hairdressing schools etc.
I think grey could look okay but it is the growing out phase would take some time.
I am just a little frustrated with myself about this.
Anyway, this is where I am with this today. Thanks.
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First suggestion, pachnik, color your hair yourself! If you are only going with one color, there are lots of options you can find in stores like Target. Not sure if Canada has something like this, but in the US you can often find cheaper hair care products at a beauty supply store. You might have to buy in bulk, but it could be worth it if the price is right.
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There's a great product from Bumble and Bumble called hair powder. It comes in different colors and you can use the tiniest bit to cover your roots. This can buy you an extra week or two between full-on touch ups. It is not an inexpensive product but you only use an eensy bit at a time, and it works quite well!
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Hello Katie, Madgeylou and Frankie,
Thank you so much for the suggestions. I think we'd have Bumble products in Sephora here. I've done a crap job of colouring my own hair in the past and I think I would like to see how it looks in its natural shade. That colour stripping sounds like a good idea.
Anyway, I am listing my options and I'll see how the work situation turns out.
This is so great on here - people offer help and support. Thanks again :)
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Turns out you all were right about the band size! I was wearing a 36 and I really should be a 32! I got a fitting this weekend and came home with two extremely comfortable bras. The brands are Spanx and Natori. Now that I know which bras work for me, I'll be able to shop at Nordstrom's rack and get them for half the price in the future!
Did you go to Nordsrom's for the fitting? I live in the DC area and think a fitting might be what I need.
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Turns out you all were right about the band size! I was wearing a 36 and I really should be a 32! I got a fitting this weekend and came home with two extremely comfortable bras. The brands are Spanx and Natori. Now that I know which bras work for me, I'll be able to shop at Nordstrom's rack and get them for half the price in the future!
Did you go to Nordsrom's for the fitting? I live in the DC area and think a fitting might be what I need.
Probably biased, but I got fitted at Nordstrom and they were wrong by two band sizes. I'm a 28 F and they put me in a 32 DD/E because that's all they had in stock . . . .
You can measure yourself and know what your band size it, let the fitter help you with general fit. Just don't depend on them to figure out exactly what you should be wearing.
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I'm a bit late to the bra-talk party, but here's a great website if you're not a large-busted lady and have issues finding the right bra size:
http://www.evesappleslingerie.com/online-bra-consultation
You plug in your measurements and it'll tell you what your size ranges are. As a small-busted lady, I've found that the standard way of measuring bust size never landed me with the right-sized bra. It didn't help that my chest is set pretty wide. I actually do better with the method described in the above site where you measure each side of your chest separately. They also have a few bras that are labelled as being good for wide-set busts, one of which I've purchased and really like.
I tend to agree that a little time and effort put into finding the proper bra size and a good-quality bra is worth it. I avoid places like Victoria's Secret, because I think their bras are both expensive AND cheaply made. I like Kohl's bras but they lack the variety of sizes I need and there's no consistency in the styling- I'll still give them a try, but I really prefer to buy bras online from a store that lets you return for free if it doesn't fit. It may have a higher sticker price but seems to pay off in the long run- less chance of the bra not working out, and they tend to be higher quality and last longer. Just my .02 on the bra thing.
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Another thing about bras. Line drying will extend the life of your bras as does hand washing. Admittedly I toss them in the machine (horrors) but never the dryer.
This is also true for other garments containing lycra.
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About the going gray/waiting for the color to grow out... my stylist told me they can strip the color out of your hair, leaving you with basically the color the hair actually is supposed to be. I get my hair dyed funky colors and we were discussing me going back to a (lighter) fire-engine red after I went deep eggplant purple, and she told me that color stripping would get about 80% of the color out on average. That would, however, making the growing out process less glaring. She said it wouldn't damage the hair (not sure I totally believe there would be NO damage) but she said it is NOT a bleach/lightener, so what do I know...
Might want to check into getting hair color stripping if you're really on the edge of going natural. Not sure what it costs, but it would be a one time thing, and then NO color after, so might be worth it?
I'm not there yet. I'm liking my rainbow of colors, and my gray isn't a pretty silver and it's more 50/50 mix right now (started graying in my 20s).
I don't know if that's strictly accurate... Peroxide lightens your hair and oxidises colour into it so it changes your natural hair colour. If you were to remove that colour, the colour you would see, is called your ' contributing pigment' so probably an orangish red colour if your hair is naturally medium brown and been coloured many times. It would be lighter then your natural hair colour and it wouldn't look very natural. Hopefully that makes sense.
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There's a great product from Bumble and Bumble called hair powder. It comes in different colors and you can use the tiniest bit to cover your roots. This can buy you an extra week or two between full-on touch ups. It is not an inexpensive product but you only use an eensy bit at a time, and it works quite well!
I bought this stuff and used it for the first time yesterday morning. It is great! I simply sprayed it where I part my hair and it covered up the demarcation line I have going.
It wasn't a messy product at all - I had been reading some of its internet reviews- and I had no problem using it. It didn't come out on my pillow overnight either.
Thanks for the excellent suggestion!
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Makes me think though...shaving is not necessary and costs something, so isn't it anti-Mustachian to continue doing so?? I'm trying to start a movement here...please join in!!
I don't shave anything except my armpits (I'm way too ticklish to have hair there!) normally. I've been shaving up to my bike bib line this summer, because I've been getting more and more into road bike racing, and EVERYBODY shaves their guns there. Some of the guys I roll with have had the best tips for keeping legs silky schmoove.
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There's a great product from Bumble and Bumble called hair powder. It comes in different colors and you can use the tiniest bit to cover your roots. This can buy you an extra week or two between full-on touch ups. It is not an inexpensive product but you only use an eensy bit at a time, and it works quite well!
I bought this stuff and used it for the first time yesterday morning. It is great! I simply sprayed it where I part my hair and it covered up the demarcation line I have going.
It wasn't a messy product at all - I had been reading some of its internet reviews- and I had no problem using it. It didn't come out on my pillow overnight either.
Thanks for the excellent suggestion!
You're welcome! I'm really glad it worked for you. :)
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About the going gray/waiting for the color to grow out... my stylist told me they can strip the color out of your hair, leaving you with basically the color the hair actually is supposed to be. I get my hair dyed funky colors and we were discussing me going back to a (lighter) fire-engine red after I went deep eggplant purple, and she told me that color stripping would get about 80% of the color out on average. That would, however, making the growing out process less glaring. She said it wouldn't damage the hair (not sure I totally believe there would be NO damage) but she said it is NOT a bleach/lightener, so what do I know...
Might want to check into getting hair color stripping if you're really on the edge of going natural. Not sure what it costs, but it would be a one time thing, and then NO color after, so might be worth it?
I'm not there yet. I'm liking my rainbow of colors, and my gray isn't a pretty silver and it's more 50/50 mix right now (started graying in my 20s).
I don't know if that's strictly accurate... Peroxide lightens your hair and oxidises colour into it so it changes your natural hair colour. If you were to remove that colour, the colour you would see, is called your ' contributing pigment' so probably an orangish red colour if your hair is naturally medium brown and been coloured many times. It would be lighter then your natural hair colour and it wouldn't look very natural. Hopefully that makes sense.
I'm not referring to peroxide/bleach/lightener. It's a color stripper that is just supposed to remove hair dye pigment. I asked again about it over the weekend, and my hairdresser confirmed, not a bleach at all, but she wouldn't do more than 3 times within a certain period of time since it could technically cause damage from repeated usage in a short period of time. She said her treatment runs about $50 a pop.
Now if you've lightened or bleached your hair to a blond, then you are right that that won't work and would probably turn your hair brassy looking and look weird growing out. I was meaning that the stripper would remove darker colors to make your new growth match up a bit better to the existing hair to circumvent the awkward gray hair/brunette line in the hair type of thing.
:)
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Lots of great advice in this column. My sport/hobby unfortunately requires a bit of bling and a wonderful undergarment called "spanx". In order to offset the cost of these goodies, I use ebay. I have two searches one for the "spanx" which for me is just the "tank top, firm control" though I do have the full body version if I ever should need it. and "western shirt" is my other search.
Now for the special shirts we wear. I started a business years ago "blinging" show shirts and casual shirts. this allows me the absolute best bargain for exactly what I want. Andwhat is this crazy thing I do that makes me wear spanx and "blinged" shirts. I compete in reining (A horseback riding discipline) events. Or had up until last summer when I sold my show horse.
I like how the firm fit tank tops make me feel overall, so I wear them at work sometimes.
I am going grey and though I do not get my hair cut more than a couple of times a year using a coupon at hair masters... I save coupons and when the temp grey hair color goes on sale I add the coupons to get them for around $2-3.
For nice expensive shoes/boots, my thing is boots btw, not nice shoes. I again turn to ebay. I have also found used boots for a fraction of full price on Amazon. Since I ride horses I've always worn boots, now I've simply bought some more fashionable boots. I feel most comfortable in them over shoes. I have TINY feet for my height and boots make my feet feel substantial:) The best brand of fashion boots, high end? Frye is what I wear and for cowboy boots Luchesse. Having my boots repaired helps the pocketbook as well.
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Now for the special shirts we wear. I started a business years ago "blinging" show shirts and casual shirts. this allows me the absolute best bargain for exactly what I want. Andwhat is this crazy thing I do that makes me wear spanx and "blinged" shirts. I compete in reining (A horseback riding discipline) events. Or had up until last summer when I sold my show horse.
This is one of the benefits of dressage! My show duds might have cost around ~$500, but at least the fashions didn't change from season to season. :)
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Turns out you all were right about the band size! I was wearing a 36 and I really should be a 32! I got a fitting this weekend and came home with two extremely comfortable bras. The brands are Spanx and Natori. Now that I know which bras work for me, I'll be able to shop at Nordstrom's rack and get them for half the price in the future!
Did you go to Nordsrom's for the fitting? I live in the DC area and think a fitting might be what I need.
Oops, just saw this! Yes, I did go to Nordstrom's in Ballston for the fitting. I had a good experience!
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I'm not referring to peroxide/bleach/lightener. It's a color stripper that is just supposed to remove hair dye pigment. I asked again about it over the weekend, and my hairdresser confirmed, not a bleach at all, but she wouldn't do more than 3 times within a certain period of time since it could technically cause damage from repeated usage in a short period of time. She said her treatment runs about $50 a pop.
I was meaning that the stripper would remove darker colors to make your new growth match up a bit better to the existing hair to circumvent the awkward gray hair/brunette line in the hair type of thing.
I asked my hairdresser about how I could start growing out the gray and she told me she could start using semi-permanent and over time it would fade as the gray grew out. I don't know. I'm tempted to shave my head and start from scratch. I wish I had never started coloring it. Note to the youngsters...Has anyone ever grown out the gray and had the hairdresser (or yourself) do partial color or highlights as it grew out? I want to stop coloring, but I can't do the line of gray for a year. Or should I just go for a butch short haircut and be done with it?
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I grew out my gray hair two years ago and love it. Semi-permanent color will not fade - it will just go brassy as the hair grows. If you are really up for it, just grin and bear it. Short haircuts are helpful but don't go ultra short if that is not your normal style as you will be miserable both with the color and the cut. What worked for me was to work from a short wavy bob to a short layered style (which was my customary style anyway). The layers helped the colors to blend some so the line wasn't that pronounced. After about 7 months of no coloring, I went with a short pixie style (which, again, was not new to me so I felt comfortable with it) and that was it. I tried growing it a bit since but I always go back to the pixie (similar to what Jamie Curtis has).
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Yeah, it sounds like I need to just woman-up and do it. Ugh.
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I'm tempted to shave my head and start from scratch. I wish I had never started coloring it. Note to the youngsters...
I know someone who did shave their head and start from scratch. She owned a business and felt she wouldn't look professional during the transition stage, so she just wore a wig until the grow out was done. I am not necessarily recommending this route though...haha. She did have gorgeous grey hair though. Sometimes the grey looks nice if it's soft, but sometimes grey hair can be wirey and dry looking on some people. I haven't made the leap yet of getting off the hair color...
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Shaving: I find it interesting that so many lady staches are shaving often/at all. Don't get me wrong, I realize there is some unwritten code that says we (in the US or globally?) are supposed to spend part of our lives and money shaving lots of areas of the body. It was only after I had my son, when I didn't feel like I had the time or energy, that I started cutting out shaving my legs. Laziness? Yes. Time saved? Yes. Money saved? Yes. Sounds like a homerun to me! My husband is German, so he never understood why I shaved all the time anyway (so apparently those efforts were wasted on him!). Now I hardly ever shave and I don't feel any differently. Okay, I don't want gawkers either...so if I am going to a wedding or something and I'm not wearing dark hose, then I will whip out the old razor and shave using basic body soap. That means I may never have to buy a razor again (the one should last me a long time if I only use it once or twice a year??). Ironically, I am in Germany now and my husband's family invited us to go swimming last week. I wondered then whether it was my husband not caring about shaving or the entire culture (which I had thought in the past was so open). I shaved just to be safe, dare I embarass his family. Well, it turns out that all the young Germans are also shaving...nary a body hair in sight. Makes me think though...shaving is not necessary and costs something, so isn't it anti-Mustachian to continue doing so?? I'm trying to start a movement here...please join in!!
Definitely not joining the movement. I went for 4 years without picking up a razor and was at the time very proud of not shaving (oh, female-only college...). Also struck out with pretty much everyone I was interested in, as basically, hairy legs and pits just aren't attractive to most males I have met. And I totally understand why and do not fault them in any way. Now I shave very regularly. In short, I don't understand why I used to gripe about shaving and think it so inconvenient, and generally don't understand other gals complaining to me about it now. If it's not your thing, that's cool, but to me the admittedly-infrequent complaints about shaving I hear often strike me as just being a complainypants and exaggerating inconvenience. I find shaving to be extremely easy and quick, and it can be very cheap as well. (You can substitute so many things for shaving cream, and it's like a mindless 10 minutes at the most of my week.) And basically, many people just don't find hairy pits and legs on women pleasant to look at, and in my rather extensive experience, hairy pits weren't pleasant in the olfactory sense either. And yes, I totally get it that a lot of women are distinctly not interested in being visually or olfactor-ally (?) pleasant to others. In that case, there should be no surprise or outrage that the general population will find them less than pleasant viscerally. I just don't get when females make a fuss about shaving like it's a huge hassle. Sounds like a wee bit of "complainypants-itis" to me. If you're philosophically against it, good on ya. I am 100% "free to be you and me." It's just that shaving is pretty high on my list of "first world (non)problems" and has basically had a very high return for me since I took it up again.
PS- I don't have "extremely sensitive skin" or, apparently, an extremely sensitive personality ;)
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Makes me think though...shaving is not necessary and costs something, so isn't it anti-Mustachian to continue doing so?? I'm trying to start a movement here...please join in!!
PS - Because I am moving to a country where stuff costs more, I stocked up today on 3 (local brand imitations of Mach 3) razors and 35 cartridges for like $50. Those should last my husband and I years. In the meantime, not having scruffy facial hair will help him professionally and not having hairy legs and pits will help me both professionally as well as be a general relationship boon. I seriously doubt that spending like $15 a year on razors (split between two people) is terribly un-mustachian, all things considered.
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I just don't get when females make a fuss about shaving like it's a huge hassle. Sounds like a wee bit of "complainypants-itis" to me. If you're philosophically against it, good on ya. I am 100% "free to be you and me." It's just that shaving is pretty high on my list of "first world (non)problems" and has basically had a very high return for me since I took it up again.
PS- I don't have "extremely sensitive skin" or, apparently, an extremely sensitive personality ;)
How much of a hassle it is varies greatly from person to person. I have thicker leg hair than most males, so when I was shaving it took about 20 minutes/day, and required lots of fancypants creams and fresh razor cartridges every day to avoid horrible razor burn (and I still itched terribly ALL THE TIME hooray eczema!)
Fortunately having hairy legs is a pretty good people filter. Men/ladies who are bothered by it are men/ladies I wouldn't want to get romantically involved with anyways. It's kind of like weightlifting that way.
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Definitely not joining the movement. I went for 4 years without picking up a razor and was at the time very proud of not shaving (oh, female-only college...). Also struck out with pretty much everyone I was interested in, as basically, hairy legs and pits just aren't attractive to most males I have met. And I totally understand why and do not fault them in any way. Now I shave very regularly. In short, I don't understand why I used to gripe about shaving and think it so inconvenient, and generally don't understand other gals complaining to me about it now. If it's not your thing, that's cool, but to me the admittedly-infrequent complaints about shaving I hear often strike me as just being a complainypants and exaggerating inconvenience. I find shaving to be extremely easy and quick, and it can be very cheap as well. (You can substitute so many things for shaving cream, and it's like a mindless 10 minutes at the most of my week.) And basically, many people just don't find hairy pits and legs on women pleasant to look at, and in my rather extensive experience, hairy pits weren't pleasant in the olfactory sense either. And yes, I totally get it that a lot of women are distinctly not interested in being visually or olfactor-ally (?) pleasant to others. In that case, there should be no surprise or outrage that the general population will find them less than pleasant viscerally. I just don't get when females make a fuss about shaving like it's a huge hassle. Sounds like a wee bit of "complainypants-itis" to me. If you're philosophically against it, good on ya. I am 100% "free to be you and me." It's just that shaving is pretty high on my list of "first world (non)problems" and has basically had a very high return for me since I took it up again.
PS- I don't have "extremely sensitive skin" or, apparently, an extremely sensitive personality ;)
The extremely massive chip on your shoulder is showing, however. ;)
Fortunately having hairy legs is a pretty good people filter. Men/ladies who are bothered by it are men/ladies I wouldn't want to get romantically involved with anyways.
Right on. Sometimes I do the hair removal thing, sometimes I don't. It's not a big deal. Personally, I've not noticed my nonchalant attitude to the issue affecting my chances with men that I find attractive. Hurrah! :D
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In some extremely conservative workplaces, skirts and hose are still the rule for women and shaving is a must. In the same vein, tattoos and piercings (except for one in each earlobe) would disqualify you for a job. I wore a school uniform for many years and I think of these rules as being in the same vein. In fact, I find them freeing in an odd way. Because my appearance blends in, and in fact is on the conservative side, I think people cut my odd personality more slack. But so much depends on your peer group, doesn't it? I moved to a college town about a year ago, and now I find myself strangely drawn to Birkenstocks :)
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I remember the days when here in Europe it was fine to have unshaven pits. I kind of liked it, weirdly enough. It was just so, accepting or something.
In the winter I don't shave, but I find that the deoderant gets pretty ooky in the pit hair. Personally.
TMI. Sorry. : )
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PS- I don't have "extremely sensitive skin" or, apparently, an extremely sensitive personality ;)
The extremely massive chip on your shoulder is showing, however. ;)
Fortunately having hairy legs is a pretty good people filter. Men/ladies who are bothered by it are men/ladies I wouldn't want to get romantically involved with anyways.
Right on. Sometimes I do the hair removal thing, sometimes I don't. It's not a big deal. Personally, I've not noticed my nonchalant attitude to the issue affecting my chances with men that I find attractive. Hurrah! :D
Please expand on the chip on my shoulder!
Yes, hypothetically, the men we really want to shack up will have the exact same aesthetic/philosophical/practical ideals as us.
In practice, the most wonderful/lovely/down-to-earth man who I am lucky enough to be shacked up with just isn't into hairy pits. Like I'm not into hairy backs. But also not into men who have to wax and therefore be more high-maintenance than I... so I am naturally attracted to my man who has what I consider the pefect amount of body hair naturally.
I am indisputably stubborn and also disillusioned by the promises of "just do exactly what you want and the man you really want will 100% coincide with your natural preferences, or else you wouldn't want to be with him anyway!"... as that totally did not pan out empirically.
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PS- I don't have "extremely sensitive skin" or, apparently, an extremely sensitive personality ;)
The extremely massive chip on your shoulder is showing, however. ;)
Fortunately having hairy legs is a pretty good people filter. Men/ladies who are bothered by it are men/ladies I wouldn't want to get romantically involved with anyways.
Right on. Sometimes I do the hair removal thing, sometimes I don't. It's not a big deal. Personally, I've not noticed my nonchalant attitude to the issue affecting my chances with men that I find attractive. Hurrah! :D
In practice, the most wonderful/lovely/down-to-earth man who I am lucky enough to be shacked up with just isn't into hairy pits. Like I'm not into hairy backs. But also not into men who have to wax and therefore be more high-maintenance than I... so I am naturally attracted to my man who has what I consider the pefect amount of body hair naturally.
That sounds like a way too complicated way to live. The love of my life has hair everywhere that he does not care to remove. Before I knew that, I would have said I don't prefer hair either. But now that I love him desperately, his hair quantity doesn't really matter. I assume that he would say the same about my shaving/not shaving preferences. It would be exhausting to keep up with every little preference, and it's not realistic (or very mature) to imagine that my spouse will be the one person whose preferences magically line up with mine in every way, or else it's not 'meant to be.'
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I don't wear much makeup and I could cut back some on clothes buying (I was doing very well for a few years buying hardly anything, but recently updated my wardrobe this summer), but I can't imagine giving up shaving at this point. If I had never shaved my legs it'd be one thing, but I did and regularly, so forget the gentlemen's opinion, it would drive me absolutely batty to have coarse hair down there. In fact, I even signed on for the laser hair removal using deal sites, and I'm in the process of getting it done on armpits and lower legs. If it works, it could save me on shaving in the long run, not to mention not needing to worry about having not shaved, and bits of time in the shower. But I do coupon and get free razors/discounted cream so shaving is not all that expensive as some make it out to be. For those complaining about cost, I definitely recommend paying attention to deals.
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Please expand on the chip on my shoulder!
Yes, hypothetically, the men we really want to shack up will have the exact same aesthetic/philosophical/practical ideals as us.
In practice, the most wonderful/lovely/down-to-earth man who I am lucky enough to be shacked up with just isn't into hairy pits. Like I'm not into hairy backs. But also not into men who have to wax and therefore be more high-maintenance than I... so I am naturally attracted to my man who has what I consider the pefect amount of body hair naturally.
I am indisputably stubborn and also disillusioned by the promises of "just do exactly what you want and the man you really want will 100% coincide with your natural preferences, or else you wouldn't want to be with him anyway!"... as that totally did not pan out empirically.
It just seems that you're quite excessively annoyed by women who slack off (in your view) on shaving because you don't think their perception of it being a hassle is acceptable reason to you, which is a bit odd when you claim you're all for people being "free to be you and me." So I don't get the rant, but hey, if starting to shave was all it took for you to get a man, I'm glad it paid off for you. :)
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I don't wear pants, so I need hosiery through the winter. I used to kill a lot of pairs of black tights. You can mend holes in the toes, but once the crotch rips out, the pair is mostly shot, and they're uncomfortable to boot. I switched to wool stockings (Very soft, very warm) and a garter belt, and it's WAY better. The stockings last forever, and when I need to wear the odd pair of sheers, if one snags, the entire pair isn't lost; you just discard the laddered one and keep using the other.
Where do you find these?
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I just can't imagine wanting to be with someone so much that spending ~20 mins/day (how long it takes me to shave my legs) wouldn't seem insane. But then I've always been much happier by myself than when I've been dating. That's over 6 days a year spent shaving! If I live to over 90 like most of my female relatives, over a year of my life would be spent shaving! Sorry, just being hot isn't going to cut it, they'd have to give me a kidney or something for me to bother with that nonsense for them.
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So maybe I'm lucky, it takes me 2 minute to shave, not 20, so I don't find it inconvenient at all.
Like I said, I understand in theory the whole "the person I want to be with won't care if I do/don't x" but in reality I find there's also things that everyone finds viscerally attractive or unattractive, end of story. Like a man I knew who broke up with someone because he just didn't like her smell. He didn't think she smelled bad, it just wasn't for him. Then you read scientific research saying that people are attracted to the pheremones of people who have compatible genes to them, as opposed to being their cousins. This is a totally random example, my point being that people find different things viscerally attractive or unattractive and it's not necessarily philosophically neat and clean, or easily summed up in aphorisms.
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I'm so happy this thread exists! Woman Power! Woo!
I used to be in this crazy cycle which I'd like to share with you all since there are probably others in a similar situation:
1. Drink too much because you're "young" and "fun" and (let's be honest) kind of depressed.
2. Have horrible skin, weight gain, and hangovers, etc. from "fun" lifestyle.
3. Buy crazy expensive makeup, clothes, and skin products to slow negative affects of "fun" lifestyle.
4. Realize said products don't work, try new ones and have no money.
5. Repeat.
Fast forward to being in possession of a growing lady stache (does that sound filthy to anyone else?). I started working out like crazy again (aerial arts and dance), because of my workout schedule my drinking naturally decreased (drastically). My moods got better because feeling strong and toned makes me happy and not like crap all the time. My stress decreased because I was no longer worried about my unhealthy lifestyle, and now I no longer have need for crazy products because my skin looks fantastic.
I use Ponds cold cream cleanser for face wash, about $7 a container.
Generic Shampoo and Conditioner.
I spring for Miss Jessies hair cream (biracial very curly hair, it does WONDERS) $35 but lasts a year and half.
I have expensive SPF 30 sunscreen that's basically just zinc. About $15 but lasts 5+ months.
Argan Oil for moisturizer, if extra is needed.
I do a honey face mask once a week, keep epsom salt for muscle soaks and have some essential oils for aromatherapy (makes me feel feminine and pampered).
I'm on bc pills so I actually don't get a period at all anymore- IT'S INCREDIBLE.
As for makeup I have a random assortment of things that I basically never use, occasionally I'll do eyeliner and mascara, or go barefaced with bright red lips (or black, I'm funky like that) but that's about it. I find usually I want to wear makeup when I don't feel confident in my own skin, which is usually when my lifestyle has become less healthy or something isn't going well emotionally. When my body is toned and taut, and my belly is full of veggies and healthy carbs, and my meditation practice is going well, I feel fabulous.
The one thing you would have to pry from my dead cold hands would be my razors and shaving cream. I spend more on that than anything else because I am a BEAST. Faerie white skin and black as coal hair, just bushels of it, thanks mom and dad! But that's my secret, and now yours, you're welcome.
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1. Drink too much because you're "young" and "fun" and (let's be honest) kind of depressed.
2. Have horrible skin, weight gain, and hangovers, etc. from "fun" lifestyle.
3. Buy crazy expensive makeup, clothes, and skin products to slow negative affects of "fun" lifestyle.
4. Realize said products don't work, try new ones and have no money.
5. Repeat.
Boy that cycle sounds really familiar to me ;) Getting off the crazy booze-pimples-makeup-depression-booze train did make a huge difference in my appearance and my mental health. Or at the very least, I feel like I look better, which is really all that counts when it's all subjective anyway. And when I stick with it, I save a crapton of money. Although now I think my taste in beer quality has gone up to account for the reduction in beer quantity, so I could probably still improve on that front (just bein' honest). But hey at least the pimples are fewer and more far between, which means I can get away with relatively little in skincare and foundation, wahoo!
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Great thread!
Hair: Get it cut twice a year. Either at a cheap salon or at a hair-school. About $40 each time with tax and tip. I have always been low-maintenance, so it's a wash and go haircut. Usually need to buy a defrizzing serum once a year. Get salon quality shampoo and conditioner in bulk at a discount store. Only wash my hair 1-2 times a week. The very few hair elastics and clips I own come from the dollar store. I also hate hair accessories, thankfully.
Clothes: Despise shopping, so when I do need something, I set a budget, do some research and go. I would like to have more patience and talent at getting stuff at thrift stores - all I see is crap and can't be assed to sort through the bins. However, when I buy new, I never ever pay full retail value. Always on sale.
Nails: Have never been into manicures/pedicures/nail polish. Yay for having man-hands!
Makeup: I'll run out or need to replace 2-3 items per year. Probably spend about $35-40 per year on this. Stick to the classics, but will mix it up for eye-shadow and lipstick when I buy a new one of those. Own 2-3 of both. Not into trends and try to buy on sale.
Periods: Diva Cup. Best investment ever.
Exercise: Ride my bike and run. Also stream work out videos on-line. Bought weight set on sale ... I'm trying to find a Beachbody work out set used on craigslist at the moment.
Hair removal: I am a hairy beast with dark hair and pale skin. Razors for legs, bikini and underarms. At-home waxing for arms (only in the summer $20) ... tweezing for eyebrows. Have been using Groupons to get laser hair removal on my upper lip and chin. $100 for six sessions. Need another 10 or so. Totally worth it, the hair is black and it will be gone forever!
Everything Else: Dollar store discounts for brand name toothpaste, soap and deodorant. Rotate using different facewash, sunscreen and moisturizer. Stick to drug store brands as my dermatologist said the fancy stuff is a waste of money.
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RE: Going grey / stopping hair color
I just wanted to mention that I have recently tried a hair color remover (found on Amazon; worked pretty well for me) and am growing out my hair color so that my natural grey will be "on display." I can't remember the brand I used, but can look it up if people are interested.
I wanted to let other Grey Staches on the forum that there are several "purple" shampoos available that are specifically designed for grey hair. They remove brassiness and brighten the grey quite well. I got lots of compliments on my hair when I was naturally grey (before I caved in to the demands of job searching and started coloring again . . . . aaarrgh!) Oh well, I'm re-retired now so no more hair coloring for me. (I'm 62.)
The brand of shampoo I am using is Shiny Silver Ultra and I got it at a local beauty supply shop (Sally Beauty Supply). There are several brands available, though, and probably can be found online too.
So I hope this is helpful to those who have mentioned that their grey hair isn't "pretty grey." This can really add some style to your hair, and it's a fairly cheap experiment. I think I paid less than $9 for the shampoo.
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Some of you have mentioned issues with body hair. I have a lot of thick, dark hair under my armpits. I never wear sleeveless shirts because even when I just shaved my armpits, the hair is still visible.
Has anyone tried one of the IPL systems for home use? Like this: http://www.amazon.com/Philips-Precision-Removal-Attachment-Shipping/dp/B00E2QQC5A/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1382081311&sr=8-5&keywords=philips+lumea (http://www.amazon.com/Philips-Precision-Removal-Attachment-Shipping/dp/B00E2QQC5A/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1382081311&sr=8-5&keywords=philips+lumea)
I read a lot of positive reviews about this, but there are other models too (f.ex. Remington I-Light). They are not permanent like a professional hair removal, so the hair grows back when you stop using them. But the device should last a couple of years, considering I would use it once per month (after the initial intensive period of every week/two weeks). And I could be hair free! Right now I am really tempted to get one (I found the Philips Lumea for about $300) but I am still undecided.
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Use Veet Easy Wax Electrical home waxing kit... It's super fast (about 20 mins to wax legs) and easy to use (unlike every other home waxing solution I have tried), and unlike shaving should last even the hairiest girl at least 2 weeks - up to 6 weeks for less hairy people. You can also use it for armpits, bikini etc - should last at least a week even if you are hairy. Doesn't take significantly longer than shaving. (Well except you have to let the thing heat up first for half an hour, but you can let it heat while you do other things.) And apparently, I'm yet to see this - after 10 years of waxing your hair never grows back. (Has worked for other people I know).
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Hair removal:
I can vouch for hair growing back thinner with consistent waxing.
I have sensitive skin, but am very hirsute if left to my own devices, so I don't feel that leaving my legs au naturale is an option for me (cycling and hairs making tiny and very painful knots, etc). However shaving is a PITA as:
a) It takes so long
b) I need to do it DAILY in summer (or at the least, every other day)
c) My skin reacts badly to it
So I swapped to waxing. Or more specifically, 'sugaring' which can be done at home, and requires sugar, honey, old cotton strips and a stove. It is MUCH cheaper than commercial waxing and leaves my skin in a better condition. And slowly but surely, the hairs on my legs are taking longer and longer to grow back, so the 'in between' parts are pretty bearable (I also have blond-ish hair).
I also wax my armpits about once a week (TMI???) if I can remember, because it minimises the number of times I have to shave them, and reduces odour a LOT. Yes is it painful, but it doesnt' take too long.
Deoderant:
Stopped using commercial deoderants except for the odd occasions that I want an anti-perspirant. I make a deoderant 'cream' using coconut oil, baking soda, a bit of cornstarch and a few drops of whatever fragrance I fancy. Costs peanuts (less than $5 per annum) and works just as well (if not better) than commercial stuff for odour reduction. Heaps of similar recipes on Google.
Hair:
Decided that a pixie cut with my very quick growing hair was a waste of money (needed a haircut less than every four weeks to prevent mullet formation). Grew out my hair, get a hair cut once or twice a year.
About eighteen months ago I switched to using baking soda and vinegar to wash hair (for about 90% of washes). There was a 'phase in' period of about three months but now my hair is quite happy with being washed every 5-7 days. Hair products now cost me less than $15 per annum.
Periods:
Diva cup + a heap of cloth pads I purchased years ago which are just only starting to wear out now (I have saved hundreds per year by swapping to non-disposable items)
Clothes: I have a small wardrobe, and everything fits in there. Everything in there is mended at least once prior to turfing out. Mixture of op-shopped clothing and clothing purchased for specific purposes (after waiting at least a fortnight to deliberate). Underwear excepted, I won't purchase a clothing item unless something else wears out.
Guess what? I don't spend much money on girly things, but still manage to feel very feminine.
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I am in my late 50's and grew up in a time when women didn't always wear makeup, so I never got used to using it very much.
I have never dyed my hair, and it is going gray.
I second Mrs. MM about keeping fit.
Whoever you are, you are my doppelganger! I have never worn makeup, I revealed my grey about three years ago and while I don't spend money on classes, I do jog/run 3-4 days a week and try to do some sort of weight work a couple of times a week. I figure a reasonable diet and fitness regimen, great life outlook and spirit should get me through. I do work in a environment that rewards skill not appearance. I don't envy women that have to compete in an "appearance important" work place.
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Agreed.working in my casual office easily saves 1000+ after tax dollars a year compared to my previous job... And so much hassle saved too!
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I had a half head of blonde foils put in my hair for years, and recently decided this was crap and I'd like to grow out my natural light ash brown colour. So I put a ash blonde hair colour through the lot. Unfortunately, my hair gets really brassy really quickly and I've now got this horrible orange colour despite purple shampoo and purple toner. Anyone think colour remover would remove the orange and at least go back to the blond-ish colour?
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Question for you lady stachers....if you commute to work on a bike, what kind of bike do you recommend? There is a good conversation going on here (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/looking-for-a-basic-commuter-bike/) about buying a basic commuter bike. Lots of the responses are for men's bikes. What about for the ladies?
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Question for you lady stachers....if you commute to work on a bike, what kind of bike do you recommend? There is a good conversation going on here (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/looking-for-a-basic-commuter-bike/) about buying a basic commuter bike. Lots of the responses are for men's bikes. What about for the ladies?
For reference, I commute about 9km (6mi?) each way.
I have a men's flat-bar road bike. Better-than-average quality, to make it a nicer ride (encourages me to use it more!). Put a bike rack on it so I can handle lovely panniers and I have a couple of 'handbag' bags that I can attach to the rack. The panniers are lovely- I spent too much money on them, but they are locally made by a company that is hugely environmentally conscious, and canvas will last forever (and they are six years old now and despite a hard life, are going strong). You can add a lot of personality to an otherwise plain bike by a good set of commuter panniers (there are some great non-sporty ones out there if you hunt). I purchased the brightest set of lights I could afford and a reflective sash, as I do a lot of riding at dusk. I chose my bike because it appears relatively nondescript if I take off my lights and panniers, so it is less of a thief target. I was warned off the more classic ladies 'commuter' bikes with the really upright posture, probably because 9km up and down the hills I negotiate would be too slow/hard work. YMMV (ha!) depending on distance and riding conditions. Because I am a bit of a speed freak I think if I were commuting much farther than I am I would get drop bars, just because they are more comfortable on my hands and arms (as they offer a wider range of hand positions) but this is personal preference.
In terms of clothes, it depends. Short trips I often do in street wear. And I can ride a bike in short heels too. I will ride in a slightly-above-the-knee skirt or dress with opaque tights or leggings (or lycra) which has been fine- have had to trial the skirts-and-leggings combination to ensure the skirt doesn't stick or ride up (ha!) while cycling. I have one of these too which I occasionally use: http://cyclestyle.com.au/shop/accessories/skirt-garter/ This means that I can ride to a social event and not need to change at all. At work I need to change into a set uniform anyway, and the summers are hot enough here that for half the year I am sticky by the time I get to work anyway, so I so often wear a pair of leggings or a set of cycling shorts and t-shirt for riding to and from work. You wouldn't necessarily need to do that though and I know several people who amble to work in their work attire, or part of it (e.g. keep a set of dress shoes at work, so you don't need to cart them around).
Long post (sorry!) but hope this helps.
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Has anyone ever grown out the gray and had the hairdresser (or yourself) do partial color or highlights as it grew out? I want to stop coloring, but I can't do the line of gray for a year. Or should I just go for a butch short haircut and be done with it?
I cut mine very short in order to get to grey. I had temporary color in it so it didn't take long to get rid of the color. I am finally letting it grow out a little. I love the freedom from having to keep up color and the cost was ridiculous. In my area for a really great colorist, you could spend $200 easily.
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Has anyone ever grown out the gray and had the hairdresser (or yourself) do partial color or highlights as it grew out? I want to stop coloring, but I can't do the line of gray for a year. Or should I just go for a butch short haircut and be done with it?
I cut mine very short in order to get to grey. I had temporary color in it so it didn't take long to get rid of the color. I am finally letting it grow out a little. I love the freedom from having to keep up color and the cost was ridiculous. In my area for a really great colorist, you could spend $200 easily.
Well ladies, it has been since late August and I've been growing out the grey. I thought I would bothered by having the gray coming in, but I've just soldiered on. Tuesday I get about 6 inches chopped into something spiky and short. Color at my salon was $90 (pre-MMM) about 3 times per year (I'd hold out as long as I could). $270 x 10 years will compound to $4.5k. I'll admit I have irrational thoughts like, "People will say I look older than my mother." And then I realize, Who The Fuck Cares? I'm buying my freedom!
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Well ladies, it has been since late August and I've been growing out the grey. I thought I would bothered by having the gray coming in, but I've just soldiered on. Tuesday I get about 6 inches chopped into something spiky and short. Color at my salon was $90 (pre-MMM) about 3 times per year (I'd hold out as long as I could). $270 x 10 years will compound to $4.5k. I'll admit I have irrational thoughts like, "People will say I look older than my mother." And then I realize, Who The Fuck Cares? I'm buying my freedom!
Good on you! I am 39 and still trying to summon up the bravery to stop dyeing. You are an inspiration, I will keep checking in here to see how things are going. One day I may join you. :)
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Question for you lady stachers....if you commute to work on a bike, what kind of bike do you recommend? There is a good conversation going on here (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/looking-for-a-basic-commuter-bike/) about buying a basic commuter bike. Lots of the responses are for men's bikes. What about for the ladies?
This might be a good thread for you:
https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/cruisercomfort-bikes/msg131878/#msg131878
// mrs WW
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Awesome topic!
Hair: I'm 34 and am starting to see a few grays, but am just letting them come in. My hair is light brown so I'm hoping that they'll blend in somewhat with my natural highlights :) I'm not sure if this was mentioned earlier in the thread but if any of you live near an Aveda school/institute you can get a fantastic haircut from a senior student for less than $15. They also do color for about $40 (here in the Midwest) if you are looking to shrink your hair budget. I go about twice a year for haircuts which runs me a cool $30 a year-- gratuity is not expected or accepted! Other than that I use a styling balm that is $20 but lasts me 6 months, and whatever hairspray is cheapest when I do my shopping.
Hair removal: ugh -- still shaving. Perhaps it's time to give sugaring a go...
Lady bits: looking forward to trying the diva cup after my pregnancy
Nails: have always done on my own. It skeeves me out a bit to think about pedis especially. Yes, I have trust issues :)
Makeup: I take care of my fair complexion with ultra gentle face wash and moisturizer, and luckily can get by with just tinted lip balm. For special occasions I'll throw on concealer, mascara and some eyeshadow.
Clothes: I work in a laboratory and am in casual clothes the majority of the time - usually a Gap T, jeans and sneakers all covered by my lab coat.
Exercise: walking and hiking can always be done for $0. I also do some of the exercise videos included with Amazon prime.
Hygiene: arm and hammer toothpaste and listerine with peroxide have saved my teeth and gums. My hygienist actually said "wow!" The last time I had my cleaning. I also use A&H deo since it is usually on sale for $1 and works great. Other than that I'm not a slave to any particular brand.
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Hair: Baking soda and apple cider vinegar. No heat touches my hair. I do my own haircuts, and I've landed on a style that takes little work. Been doing this for 5 years, and I'll never go back to shampoo. My hairdresser friend said my hair is like a child's hair, completely un-abused.
Hair Removal: I shave my pits with a normal razor with replaceable heads. Don't really shave much else, since I don't have much hair on my legs.
Lady bits: Spent 4 of the last 5 years without my monthly visitor (preggo & nursing), but that part of my life is over, so I'm off to pick up a Diva cup.
Makeup: I have sensitive skin, so I don't wash my face. Like ever. Unless it actually has something on it, in which case I wash the area that's dirty. I occasionally use a dab of mineral makeup around the eyes, and I wear fancy-pants low toxicity mascara, because my eyelashes are transparent. Estimated makeup costs are <$40/yr.
Clothes: All thrift store shopping and minimalist wardrobe. I've probably spent <$25 on clothes for myself this year.
Exercise: Getting back into bike riding after having kiddos and surgery. I bought a bike trailer to haul them around in, so I'm about to be a hoss. :-)
Hygiene: Tom's toothpaste and Desert Essence mouthwash, plus regular flossing. Bathe with castile soap, used sparingly, and I don't wear deoderant. I hardly ever sweat, but if I do, a dab of baking soda in the pits does the trick.
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Well ladies, it has been since late August and I've been growing out the grey. I thought I would bothered by having the gray coming in, but I've just soldiered on. Tuesday I get about 6 inches chopped into something spiky and short. Color at my salon was $90 (pre-MMM) about 3 times per year (I'd hold out as long as I could). $270 x 10 years will compound to $4.5k. I'll admit I have irrational thoughts like, "People will say I look older than my mother." And then I realize, Who The Fuck Cares? I'm buying my freedom!
That's fantastic! I stopped coloring almost 3 years ago and never looked back. I love the convenience of not having to think about it. I love my hair now (it is about 50% gray) and the money I'm saving is nothing to sneeze at either. And yes, my almost 70 year old mother still colors her hair but I don't think I look older and, even if I did, I really don't care ;-)
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Ordered a mooncup today (like a diva cup) I didn't go through an awful lot of sanitary products as I'm quite light, but I reckon I'll start saving money in a year and of course there's the environmental and health benefits.
Have always been very low maintenance on the hair-makeup-beauty front. I always used to feel bad about it (like I didn't care about myself if I didn't spend money on those things) but now I think I'm coming round to the idea that I am doing just fine thanks and I cherish the money I saved not buying it (although pre-MMM so not much of that is evident now)
I like to spend money on natural moisturisers/solid shampoo and cocoa butter body cream (smells like chocolate - worth every penny). I wear makeup only when I have a choir performance and sometimes when we go out in the evening. I get my hair cut professionally maybe twice a year if that (going to track down some hairdressing scissors and try one of the you tube DIY cuts) I have never coloured by hair in my life, and plan not to even when I go more grey. (I'm 31 now) My mum went really silvery, so I guess I'll just have to put up with it when it's in-between. I know it makes you look older, but frankly we can't deny that forever. I might change my mind when it happens, but we will cross that bridge then. I've started using tweezers more often for my eyebrows instead of my already-infrequent trips to get them shaped. I don't shave very often, especially not in the winter, and I buy blades in 'bulk' on ebay for half the price. Am about to switch to a non-alu/non-paraben deodorant too. Not sure if it'll be much cheaper, but I'm finding I can often do without if i'm not running around so should be fine.
Clothes are tricky because I've hardly bought a thing this year (or the previous 3), but I really need a new classic coat and some other basics. I only have one pair of jeans I'd want to wear out of the house and that coat must be 5+ years old and is too fashion-y to still be wearing. I do like clothes, but buy in fits and starts and need to be careful of emergency panic buying for special events and the like. Working from home most of the time has meant my wardrobe is mainly denim and warm hoodies and so although I don't need to spend a ton, I could do myself a huge favour (and confidence boost) by spending some sensible money.
Great to have a lady 'stache thread to help us (and other people) see that the trappings of being a lady are neither obligatory nor expensive if wanted. I like the quote above. "who the F cares? I'm buying my freedom!"
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Question for you lady stachers....if you commute to work on a bike, what kind of bike do you recommend? There is a good conversation going on here (https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/looking-for-a-basic-commuter-bike/) about buying a basic commuter bike. Lots of the responses are for men's bikes. What about for the ladies?
This might be a good thread for you:
https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/cruisercomfort-bikes/msg131878/#msg131878
// mrs WW
Thanks for the link! I hadn't seen your reply until now.
Ladies, I think I might invest in a diva cup. I'm worried about using it at work, though. There is one bathroom that is just for one person (so it has its own sink). I was concerned about how I would clean it at work since we have a bathroom with stalls and the sinks outside of the stalls. But if I used the single bathroom, it might work!
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Ladies, I think I might invest in a diva cup. I'm worried about using it at work, though. There is one bathroom that is just for one person (so it has its own sink). I was concerned about how I would clean it at work since we have a bathroom with stalls and the sinks outside of the stalls. But if I used the single bathroom, it might work!
Unless your period is SUPER heavy, you likely won't have to change it at work. Most women can leave theirs in 12 hours before rinsing (morning/night) and never have to worry about the work situation, or any not-at-home-situation. I only have to change at work one day per cycle, which is ridiculously heavy by any standards.
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Ladies, I think I might invest in a diva cup. I'm worried about using it at work, though. There is one bathroom that is just for one person (so it has its own sink). I was concerned about how I would clean it at work since we have a bathroom with stalls and the sinks outside of the stalls. But if I used the single bathroom, it might work!
Unless your period is SUPER heavy, you likely won't have to change it at work. Most women can leave theirs in 12 hours before rinsing (morning/night) and never have to worry about the work situation, or any not-at-home-situation. I only have to change at work one day per cycle, which is ridiculously heavy by any standards.
Good to know! I couldn't really grasp how much it holds and how often you have to empty it.
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I have had good experience with reusable cloth pads, especially if you are squeamish about a diva cup. (I'm not but my daughter is.) This company might be a bit pricey but compared to disposable pads you easily make it back in short order: http://www.partypantspads.com/ (http://www.partypantspads.com/)
I don't color my graying hair, I don't wear makeup, and I use baking soda & vinegar to wash & condition my hair. What I say about not looking "the part" is that I'm changing what "the part" looks like. I'm not doing anything drastically rebellious. I don't think most people even notice. I barely notice whether people are wearing makeup. When I make an effort to notice, what I notice is that more and more people don't wear makeup.
You can choose to wear makeup and dye your hair. That's fine. But don't pretend like you have to, to justify the expense. It's your choice.
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Ladies, I think I might invest in a diva cup. I'm worried about using it at work, though. There is one bathroom that is just for one person (so it has its own sink). I was concerned about how I would clean it at work since we have a bathroom with stalls and the sinks outside of the stalls. But if I used the single bathroom, it might work!
Unless your period is SUPER heavy, you likely won't have to change it at work. Most women can leave theirs in 12 hours before rinsing (morning/night) and never have to worry about the work situation, or any not-at-home-situation. I only have to change at work one day per cycle, which is ridiculously heavy by any standards.
Good to know! I couldn't really grasp how much it holds and how often you have to empty it.
You can also just wipe it out with TP if you are away from home (obviously still need to properly wash it out every 12 hours or so). I've never had any issues doing this while travelling, midday, etc., but if you are prone to yeast infections or something similar it might not be a good idea for you. I prefer using the diva-cup at work because I don't have to worry about remembering to grab my purse or digging around in my desk drawer every time I head to the bathroom.
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Another +1 for the diva-cup type products. I bought a mooncup (it's called a MCUK in the US) and have got on fine with it. It's a learning curve putting it in and removing it, and you need to be ok with the ick factor but it all comes with time and patience. Used it for two cycles, and I swear it's even shortened the no. of days. I am relatively light, but for you ladies who go through a ton of pads/tampons it's a brilliant investment. And better for environment and for your body. Win -win-win.
Strictly speaking you're meant to change it every 6-8 hours but I'm afriad I don't and just do it twice a day cleaning with mild fragrance-free soap once a day and a good rinse the other time.
Here's to the lady stache!
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I purchased a wax set from a beauty supply store that sells to the public. It was on sale for half price. I've owned it for years and wax mine and my daughters eyebrows. It probably paid for itself in the first couple months if you consider what waxing cost at a salon. Of course tweezing would be cheaper.
I stopped the salon coloring and grew my hair out a few years ago. Now I buy hair color with coupons at the grocery store. Every other time I do the root touch up which I can get for about $2 with a coupon and works great. I tried going gray but hated it. I get my hair cut 2-3 times a year.
I wear very little makeup so the cost is not much.
I try to dry my razor off after using it to extend the life of the blades.
I wash my hair completely twice a week and the rest of the week I use a tiny dab just at the hairline which seems to get greasier than the rest. My hair always looks shiny and clean. I condition daily because my hair gets dry. I buy with coupons.
I do my own mani and pedis. So cheap and still looks good. I try to use a light color (pink) for toenails. Someone would have to have to get a close look to notice any chips.
I intend to try more DIY beauty items. I've been reading about the oil cleanse method for washing your face so I think I will be trying that.
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I bought a huge bottle of Pura D'Or argan oil off Amazon for about $35 over a year ago. Comparable size and product at Sephora is $94!! And I still have about 2/3 of the bottle left - use it for oil cleansing method, moisturizer, hair treatment, frizz tamer. Great value & beauty multitasker.
I also use henna to color my hair. I buy the bricks from Lush - they are $26 a pop and one half of the brick is enough for my head. I color quarterly, so my annual cost for that is about $52. I think it's a good value - for those willing to be more experimental, you can buy henna/indigo/cassava powder off the internet and make your own blends for even less. The henna is a good hair treatment - I have zero split ends and haven't had my hair cut in about 18 months, which also saves money.
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Thanks for the info! Have Malaya wanted to try Argan oil bit have been put off by the price.
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I have had good experience with reusable cloth pads, especially if you are squeamish about a diva cup. (I'm not but my daughter is.) This company might be a bit pricey but compared to disposable pads you easily make it back in short order: http://www.partypantspads.com/ (http://www.partypantspads.com/)
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Definitely going to try these! I'm sad about using disposable stuff, especially things I use so frequently. Thanks for the link!
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I have had good experience with reusable cloth pads, especially if you are squeamish about a diva cup. (I'm not but my daughter is.) This company might be a bit pricey but compared to disposable pads you easily make it back in short order: http://www.partypantspads.com/ (http://www.partypantspads.com/)
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Definitely going to try these! I'm sad about using disposable stuff, especially things I use so frequently. Thanks for the link!
Reusable pads are super easy to make yourself, fyi. There are a ton of patterns available on the internet if you need a starting place, I started with a google search, then adjusted until I hit on a pattern/fabric combo that I like the best. For me that's a square with rounded ends, snaps on opposite corners, and made out of dark flannel.
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I have had good experience with reusable cloth pads, especially if you are squeamish about a diva cup. (I'm not but my daughter is.) This company might be a bit pricey but compared to disposable pads you easily make it back in short order: http://www.partypantspads.com/ (http://www.partypantspads.com/)
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Definitely going to try these! I'm sad about using disposable stuff, especially things I use so frequently. Thanks for the link!
Reusable pads are super easy to make yourself, fyi. There are a ton of patterns available on the internet if you need a starting place, I started with a google search, then adjusted until I hit on a pattern/fabric combo that I like the best. For me that's a square with rounded ends, snaps on opposite corners, and made out of dark flannel.
I thought of that while I was looking at them. I'd like to how the professionals do it, and then sure, for 10$ I'm pretty sure I can get material for a bunch. It looks like the nylon is the moisture-proof component; have you found that works out fine for homemade ones?
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You can purchase PUL online-- there's lots of stockists for people that make nappies
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You can purchase PUL online-- there's lots of stockists for people that make nappies
Excellent, thanks!
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Ladies, I think I might invest in a diva cup. I'm worried about using it at work, though. There is one bathroom that is just for one person (so it has its own sink). I was concerned about how I would clean it at work since we have a bathroom with stalls and the sinks outside of the stalls. But if I used the single bathroom, it might work!
Unless your period is SUPER heavy, you likely won't have to change it at work. Most women can leave theirs in 12 hours before rinsing (morning/night) and never have to worry about the work situation, or any not-at-home-situation. I only have to change at work one day per cycle, which is ridiculously heavy by any standards.
Good to know! I couldn't really grasp how much it holds and how often you have to empty it.
You can also just wipe it out with TP if you are away from home (obviously still need to properly wash it out every 12 hours or so). I've never had any issues doing this while travelling, midday, etc., but if you are prone to yeast infections or something similar it might not be a good idea for you. I prefer using the diva-cup at work because I don't have to worry about remembering to grab my purse or digging around in my desk drawer every time I head to the bathroom.
You can also just put in a shield to catch any "overflow" if you really can't get through the whole day. If you want an idea of how they work for you, try the disposable Instead Cups to get used to the idea.
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Ooh, I love this category. I have been wondering about these things.
I totally agree that a fit, healthy body is the best way to look beautiful. Last fall I quit my expensive, non-mustachian gym, which was costing me, gulp, $117 per month. I had actually hired a personal trainer earlier in the year to show me how to work out. I consider this a valid investment in my health, because I had some worrying health problems (early stage appendix cancer last year). So with the trainer's advice, I found a new way to work out (using weights and calisthenics), and dropped 40 lbs and changed my body chemistry. I'm much better set up now to avoid a recurrence, and also I love the way I look. I look 10 years younger, for one thing. So that's good.
After quitting Expensive Gym, I now just work out at my company gym, which is free, three mornings per week. The company gym is not open on weekends, so last Saturday I tried a ballet barre class. It was awesome, and my legs are still sore. So it must work! I'm trying to negotiate a deal, where I pay less than $10 per class, which I can use only on Saturday mornings. They offered me a 12-class package for $85, but I'd have to use the package up within six weeks. That won't work, since I can't really get there during the week. So I'm holding out. I don't want to let a large fitness bill creep back into my monthly budget.
I used to get eyebrow waxes and facials religiously, but the facials ended up breaking some capillaries around my nose. WTF. So I stopped. My skin looks fine. I am also tweezing my eyebrows myself. I get two to three pedicures over the summer, and go au naturel the rest of the year.
I wear foundation and mascara, which I buy at CVS. If I'm going out, I might break out the lip gloss, eyeliner and eyeshadow as well. Maybe not.
I get my hair colored and cut, for $165, every three months. I have heard that if you look good in gray, you can go gray. I look like @#$% in gray, so I would have a hard time giving this one up.
Until right now, I have spent a TON of money on clothes. Probably $2,000 to $3,000 per year. That is one area where I need to cut back. Now that I fit into a size 8-10, I can shop at some of the cool vintage stores in my part of the world. So I am going to give that a whirl. I need to look positively fashionable, not just presentable, at work. So that is going to be a challenge.
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Oh, and I use Dove soap on my face and body. I get the best results from it. It's much, much better for my face than any expensive cleanser.
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I have had good experience with reusable cloth pads, especially if you are squeamish about a diva cup. (I'm not but my daughter is.) This company might be a bit pricey but compared to disposable pads you easily make it back in short order: http://www.partypantspads.com/ (http://www.partypantspads.com/)
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Definitely going to try these! I'm sad about using disposable stuff, especially things I use so frequently. Thanks for the link!
Reusable pads are super easy to make yourself, fyi. There are a ton of patterns available on the internet if you need a starting place, I started with a google search, then adjusted until I hit on a pattern/fabric combo that I like the best. For me that's a square with rounded ends, snaps on opposite corners, and made out of dark flannel.
I thought of that while I was looking at them. I'd like to how the professionals do it, and then sure, for 10$ I'm pretty sure I can get material for a bunch. It looks like the nylon is the moisture-proof component; have you found that works out fine for homemade ones?
I actually only make myself panty liners, so I don't worry about a moisture barrier. I use the panty liners to catch the overflow from a menstrual cup, I have a Ladycup from France and a Lunette from Finland (I think). These are the best things ever! I'm always trying to convert friends, with mixed reactions :-)
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You can purchase PUL online-- there's lots of stockists for people that make nappies
Excellent, thanks!
What may be useful for me to mention though is that you may not need waterproofing/water resistance the majority of the time anyway. If you're going to have a go at making some, then make a couple with and without PUL and see how they 'perform'.
(By the way, I have been using cloth pads since about 2006 and the older ones are just starting to get to the throw-away stage now. It has been possibly one of the most thrifty moves I've made without consciously thinking about it!)
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Has anyone ever grown out the gray and had the hairdresser (or yourself) do partial color or highlights as it grew out? I want to stop coloring, but I can't do the line of gray for a year. Or should I just go for a butch short haircut and be done with it?
I cut mine very short in order to get to grey. I had temporary color in it so it didn't take long to get rid of the color. I am finally letting it grow out a little. I love the freedom from having to keep up color and the cost was ridiculous. In my area for a really great colorist, you could spend $200 easily.
Well ladies, it has been since late August and I've been growing out the grey. I thought I would bothered by having the gray coming in, but I've just soldiered on. Tuesday I get about 6 inches chopped into something spiky and short. Color at my salon was $90 (pre-MMM) about 3 times per year (I'd hold out as long as I could). $270 x 10 years will compound to $4.5k. I'll admit I have irrational thoughts like, "People will say I look older than my mother." And then I realize, Who The Fuck Cares? I'm buying my freedom!
Update on growing out the gray: Just wanted to update that I am now 100% natural gray and all color is grown out/cut off. I receive more compliments on my hair now than I ever did before! Yes, I had to cut it short after growing the roots out for 3 months, then get a second cut after another 2 months or so to get rid of all the color ends. I get these amusing "solidarity" nods and smiles from women now--like I'm making a political statement for going gray (maybe I am). I also get women saying things like, "Oh, I've been thinking of growing my gray out. Maybe I will." I don't regret it at all.
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That's awesome Basenji! I'm only 34 and have decided to allow my hair to go grey whenever it likes. So far, just a few strands.
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That's awesome Basenji! I'm only 34 and have decided to allow my hair to go grey whenever it likes. So far, just a few strands.
+1
I was coloring my hair. Had a brief period of highlights. Now I'm just doing the natural thing. My hair is a lot healthier. I'm also thinking about cutting it to my shoulders to minimize upkeep (not that I do very much to it now).
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I started going grey before I hit my 21st birthday. I don't dye my hair, nobody usually notices the grey unless I point it out (I am mousy brown)-- they look genuinely startled to see grey if I show them, so I don't think they're being polite.
However where I live going grey and letting it do so without covering it up doesn't appear to be such a big counter-cultural thing as it is in the US.
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Had an old friend I haven't seen in a couple of years ask me if my grey was real or from a bottle last night, then tell me how good it looked and how lucky I was when I told her it's au naturale. Score!
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Thanks to this thread I've bought the Lunette menstrual cup and have gone through two cycles with it. I really prefer it to anything else! I love not having to buy products every month, I love not having that awful itchy dryness that tampons used to give me, and I especially love only having to empty and reinsert twice a day (in the morning and at night). When I'm using it, most days I don't even know I have my period! Highly recommended.
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I have a mooncup too but don't use it religiously and sometimes use tampons.
I don't dye my hair anymore (no grey yet) and just use jojoba oil, soap and water and a cheap exfoliating scrub for cleaning my face and body.
I'm attempting to do the no buying new clothes in 2014 challenge but I'm finding that difficult already! Lol.
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I am trying to do better in the fitness realm. I have found that when I am slender an toned it makes a HUGE difference in the way I feel about myself. That is one reason I don't have many clothes.....I haven't "earned" them with discipline. I have never told anyone that before. I've never known what made me feel that way, but I'm trying to use that as an incentive to be healthier! It also forces me to be more creative with the items I already have.
I can relate to the "earned" part of this. I hate clothes shopping, and tend to avoid it, but that's mostly because I am heavier and things don't really look great on me, so I can't justify spending a lot of money on something. I am trying to motivate myself though with a per pound reward system, where I move $10 per pound to a savings for clothing shopping, and will allow myself to buy something I normally wouldn't once I hit my total goal. Then I won't feel like I'm wasting my money buying new clothing because it will look better and I will have "earned" it.
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Has anyone used an IUD? I'm thinking of switching from the pill to an IUD. I'm really intrigued by the copper/hormone-free one.
I had one for 4 years before I got my tubes tied. I liked the hormone free bit (it was great to be back on my natural schedule and not have to worry about taking the pill) a lot. The piece you'll hear about women who don't have kids not being able to is bogus and officially retracted by the FDA a couple of years ago (depending on your location some gynos can be quite archaic when it comes to that kind of thing).
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My SIL has an IUD and her period has basically stopped, I think. I'm not sure what kind it is, though.
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Also, much like kaetana, from this thread I've decided to go for a DivaCup. Currently on my first trial :) I'm slowly transitioning to cloth pads, too, but I'm trying to find the kind I like best. I should and eventually will make some, but without a sewing machine I know I need to just purchase a few to know that I like them and find a good design to copy that I already know works.
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Has anyone used an IUD? I'm thinking of switching from the pill to an IUD. I'm really intrigued by the copper/hormone-free one.
I had one for 4 years before I got my tubes tied. I liked the hormone free bit (it was great to be back on my natural schedule and not have to worry about taking the pill) a lot. The piece you'll hear about women who don't have kids not being able to is bogus and officially retracted by the FDA a couple of years ago (depending on your location some gynos can be quite archaic when it comes to that kind of thing).
I don't want to have kids, so I'm actually keen on the longer lifetime. I read that it's 10 years. Did you experience heavier periods? That's the big warning that I've received, but I wonder how much heavier it will actually be.
It's hard for me to tell since I went straight from the pill - I had pretty strong hormonal reactions to all three major dosages. I also used a Diva Cup (started about 4 months before IUD) so "heavier" in volume didn't make much difference with my actual experience. The heavier periods most people experience is actually them going off of hormones, but the copper has been shown to have an effect although not universal. My cramps went down, but the IUD played a pretty big role in that as well. Unfortunately too many variables to have a good answer!
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Thanks! I'm really leaning toward a copper IUD, but I don't know anyone that has one. Also, it's not really something that is easy to bring up in a group. "Please raise your hand if you've had a copper IUD?" Could make for awkward dinner conversation.
Haha I guess it depends on the group, I've had quite a few of those types of conversations.
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Has anyone used an IUD? I'm thinking of switching from the pill to an IUD. I'm really intrigued by the copper/hormone-free one.
I had one for 4 years before I got my tubes tied. I liked the hormone free bit (it was great to be back on my natural schedule and not have to worry about taking the pill) a lot. The piece you'll hear about women who don't have kids not being able to is bogus and officially retracted by the FDA a couple of years ago (depending on your location some gynos can be quite archaic when it comes to that kind of thing).
I don't want to have kids, so I'm actually keen on the longer lifetime. I read that it's 10 years. Did you experience heavier periods? That's the big warning that I've received, but I wonder how much heavier it will actually be.
It's hard for me to tell since I went straight from the pill - I had pretty strong hormonal reactions to all three major dosages. I also used a Diva Cup (started about 4 months before IUD) so "heavier" in volume didn't make much difference with my actual experience. The heavier periods most people experience is actually them going off of hormones, but the copper has been shown to have an effect although not universal. My cramps went down, but the IUD played a pretty big role in that as well. Unfortunately too many variables to have a good answer!
Thanks! I'm really leaning toward a copper IUD, but I don't know anyone that has one. Also, it's not really something that is easy to bring up in a group. "Please raise your hand if you've had a copper IUD?" Could make for awkward dinner conversation.
I just got a copper IUD in January (following the birth of my daughter in Nov.) and so far, I'm liking it. However, it has given me heavier periods. MUCH heavier, as in I have to empty out my Diva Cup every 2 hours for a few days (never had a problem going for 12 hours before this) and it's been lasting for a full 7 days. Also, it's changed how my periods are. They used to start heavy (for me) and then taper off after a day or two. Now they start slowly, work up to being ridiculously heavy for a few days, and then suddenly stop. ??
I'm not sure how much of this is due to postpartum hormonal changes, though. I said that I like my IUD and it's true. I did horribly on the pill, getting all kinds of nasty side effects from the hormones, including worse cramping. With the IUD I actually feel like my hormones are on a more even keel (even during my period) and I don't have much cramping at all now.
If you have any questions for me, I'll keep reading this thread.
**Note: For those curious, I am breastfeeding but I am among the small percentage of very, very unlucky women who apparently get their periods back straight away. 1 week after my post-birth bleeding stopped, I got my period again. Total WTF moment, but I've been getting it regularly since then. > (
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I got the hormone IUD (Mirena) 4 years ago. A few months later my periods stopped and I haven't had one since. Major bonus. I haven't had children, so it really hurt when it went in but that's it.
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I got the hormone IUD (Mirena) 4 years ago. A few months later my periods stopped and I haven't had one since. Major bonus. I haven't had children, so it really hurt when it went in but that's it.
Doesn't that freak you out? You'd never know if you got pregnant . . . even though the chances are really slim, it would be terrifying not to find out until it was too late.
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This may sound strange... but not really.
I usually did continuous cycling to avoid my period for a few months at a time while on the pill anyway. IUDs are statistically better at birth control than the pill (especially since a lot of the improvement is due to eliminating human error and I was never good at taking it exactly at the right time), so for me it felt like a win.
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I know someone who had a copper IUD and has issues with it. It slipped out of alignment or something (sorry, I don't know the details), and she got pregnant. Then miscarried because of the IUD. Just wanted to throw in a possible problem so you can see both sides.
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Well, right off the bat - if your guy likes the lingerie then he needs to buy it for you! :) That will save you some bucks right there, and it will be his contribution to "sharing the load" that you're both enjoying...
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I've never tried an IUD as the idea freaks me out, hubbie paid for a vasectomy so we don't have to worry about birth control anymore.
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Does anyone have a recommendation for a thick, hydrating lotion/cream for the body? I've been SO dry. I've been using olive oil on my skin at night and Trader Joe's unscented lotion in the morning, but I'm still SO dry.
My favorite is Sympathy for the Skin, a body cream made by Lush. Smells amazing and feels great on the skin. Not cheap though, so my other favorite is avocado oil, massaged into wet skin. (It's not that nice on dry skin, has to be damp to wet.)
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thick, hydrating lotion/cream for the body?
Cetaphyl body lotion (in a tub). Costco carries it.
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I use Eucerin Intensive Repair lotion, I'm in a job that my hands are constantly being washed so they get very dry. This stuff is awesome and unscented.
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I get very dry hands as I have pet cats and dogs and end up washing my hands 10000 times a day lol. I keep cheap baby lotion bottles dotted around the house but I often forget to use it!
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I changed by diet and vitamins a year or more ago...I have found that my omega 3 vitamins and liberal use of olive oil on my salad has changed my skin, face and, hands and body...no need for lotion anymore. For me it has remarkable effects. I'm Sure it's not scientifically proven anywhere else, but it works for me.
So interesting that you say that! I have cut out dairy (almost entirely) and notice I don't get the flaking skin on my legs or scalp anymore. I seem to be able to tolerate greek yogurt. Not sure if it's the substance or the low volume, but definitely has an effect. I've also increased avocados, so that may have something to do with it that I hadn't considered before.
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thick, hydrating lotion/cream for the body?
Cetaphyl body lotion (in a tub). Costco carries it.
I bought a tub yesterday, and it's great! The Lush recommendation was also appealing, but I don't trust myself in the store!
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I have extremely dry skin and have found fish oil capsules to be very helpful. I got a huge bottle for $10 on sale and it's lasted 2 months so far. I still use lotion, but I no longer feel itchy and tight. (Note for other Australians: try those discount pharmacy chains like Wizard, way cheaper than supermarket/priceline).
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An avocado a day keeps itchy dry skin away!
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There seems to be lots of people really happy with their IUDs, so it might be worth mentioning the other side. I don't do well with the pill - it works as contraception for me by completely removing any libido - so I've tried several different options. I had an Implanon (a little rod that is inserted through a needle into the arm and works with a low dose hormone) for 3 years that was fantastic, periods became extremely light and many months non-existent. You are supposed to remove them after that time, and weirdly the second one did;'t work so well - instead on no periods I had constant spotting - had to wear a liner all the time. From there I tried an IUD. I was really lucky that I had it inserted on a Friday afternoon, as the pain had me barely able to function for the whole weekend. They said I could go back to work the same day but there is no way that would have happened. My BF had a similar experience, but hers was if anything worse. We both found that periods became a LOT more painful, somewhat heavier but it was the pain that stood out. I stuck it out for about 9 months and then just couldn't see the point as it wasn't getting any better. From there I went to a Nuva Ring, which was perfect for me - it's a flexible silicon ring, you insert it like a tampon and remove it after 21days, then put in a new one 7 days later. Only have to remember to d anything twice a month, and very high reliability, and when we started trying for kids I could just remove it and was fertile the next cycle. The only downside for me was that it was expensive - about $30 a month - but who know what it would be in the US, presumably it should be covered if IUDs are. It's hormonal, but lower dose like IUDs, as it's locally administered. Sadly, like most women specific things, I find doctors are useless at keeping up to date with this stuff - I actually spent a fair portion of a consult telling a GP what the darn thing was.
TL:DR IUDs can be very painful for some women, other options exist like Implanon and Nuva Ring.
To other matters of lady staches;
I work as a professional, and find the easiest way to dress suitably is a few pairs of court shoes, a few suits, and a range of dress shirts. Suits are suits IMO, if they are decent quality it doesn't matter if they are a few years old. I've gone through several sizes (what with pregnancy and illness varying my weight from around 50 kg to over 70 (actually I think I hit 80 when pregnant, but that phase I was into maternity pants rather than suits), mostly hovering in low 60s, and basically just buy one suit a year - that becomes my good suit for client meetings, and whatever else fits reasonably well gets worn on non-meeting days. I've been in the workforce for nearly 10 years now and still wear the suits I bought first year out, though those are looking pretty worn now. Shirts obviously don't last so long, and I have trended from target quality towards higher end labels, but again, I tend to buy a few new in the sales each year and retire a few older / cheaper looking ones. I LOVE shirts with french cuffs - they let me wear my hubby's lego cufflinks - and they aren't easy to find so when I see them I buy them. Generally, the shops I used to buy work clothes from have almost all moved away from suits and work shirts, so I'm now really struggling to find any to buy.
Can anyone recommend good online shops (that ship outside of the US) for work shirts? This is one thing I am willing to spend a fair amount on - the best I could find last time I looked was over $100 on sale and I didn't even like the fabric.
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Has anyone tried tattooed makeup here? I like the idea of permanent dark eyeliner. I don't like the needle idea so much though.
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I have done permanent eyeliner and lip color. LOVE LOVE LOVE the eyeliner. I've had it for over ten years now. I may go back and get a refresh on it. keep sunglasses on at all times outdoors to make it last longer.
Getting the eyes done was very nerve-wracking. There is a needle very close to your eye. Mine still looks amazing. My tattoo lady did a solid line then a frayed line above it to make it look real and a little smudged.
Don't go too dark. Get less than you think you want so that on the days you want to feel "made up" you can just apply make up over it. It's always easier to put more on than take it off.
Lip color- eh, I wasn't thrilled about the color the first few years, but it did only take Chapstick to look fully 'made up'. Now it's wearing off and I may actually do that again too (but different color) I look much older and washed out without color on my face and I've never been good at applying makeup on a regular basis.
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My mom and aunt have the permanent eyeliner. Gosh, it's been at least 10 years now, though I remember when they first got it, it looked miserable - their eyes were red and puffy for about a week, if I remember correctly. Though I really like the way my face/eyes look when I put eyeliner on, I just don't see how it would be worth it for me. Apparently Kate Middleton has permanent eyeliner, given she is photographed so often I would think for high profile women it is probably a good investment.
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I color my hair myself once a month for $2.99, comes out of the grocery budget. I wear an inexpensive moisturizer and usually only wear makeup once a week. I only wear mascara on special occasions, because it is a pain to take off. I spend less than $25 per year on makeup.
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Hair: I cut it myself. It's fairly short right now but I'm trying to grow it a bit. I bought a pair of quality haircutting scissors that paid for themselves within a couple months. I have not had luck with baking soda for shampoo so now I just use Suave. I once had a horrid reaction to hair color that sent me to urgent care so I don't ever plan to color my hair again.
Skin: I use cetaphil on my face and dove on my body (Buy at Costco). I do have acne prone-skin so I buy generic brand benzoyl peroxide to use when needed. I shave with a safety razor and use coconut oil for lotion. I tweeze my own eyebrows. Waxing hurts and makes them very red and I don't care for it.
Clothes: I buy nearly everything (except underwear) from thrift stores. I am trying to have a minimalist wardrobe though and am staying away from clothes shopping altogether for a while. I still get those free panty coupons from Victoria's Secret so that takes care of my underthings collection for the most part.
Nails: I love just buffing my nails to a natural shine. I do have a fairly large collection of nail polish from my less-frugal days that I use when I want to feel fancy.
Birth control/Menstruation. I second the menstrual cup. I LOVE it and will never go back to disposables. As for birth control, we use fertility awareness. It takes a bit of planning and discipline but we have never had an unplanned pregnancy. I highly recommend reading "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" to anyone curious about this method.
Fitness: I run and do yoga, mostly at home now. It helps me relax and feel happy and healthy.
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There seems to be lots of people really happy with their IUDs, so it might be worth mentioning the other side. I don't do well with the pill - it works as contraception for me by completely removing any libido - so I've tried several different options. I had an Implanon (a little rod that is inserted through a needle into the arm and works with a low dose hormone) for 3 years that was fantastic, periods became extremely light and many months non-existent. You are supposed to remove them after that time, and weirdly the second one did;'t work so well - instead on no periods I had constant spotting - had to wear a liner all the time. From there I tried an IUD. I was really lucky that I had it inserted on a Friday afternoon, as the pain had me barely able to function for the whole weekend. They said I could go back to work the same day but there is no way that would have happened. My BF had a similar experience, but hers was if anything worse. We both found that periods became a LOT more painful, somewhat heavier but it was the pain that stood out. I stuck it out for about 9 months and then just couldn't see the point as it wasn't getting any better. From there I went to a Nuva Ring, which was perfect for me - it's a flexible silicon ring, you insert it like a tampon and remove it after 21days, then put in a new one 7 days later. Only have to remember to d anything twice a month, and very high reliability, and when we started trying for kids I could just remove it and was fertile the next cycle. The only downside for me was that it was expensive - about $30 a month - but who know what it would be in the US, presumably it should be covered if IUDs are. It's hormonal, but lower dose like IUDs, as it's locally administered. Sadly, like most women specific things, I find doctors are useless at keeping up to date with this stuff - I actually spent a fair portion of a consult telling a GP what the darn thing was.
We ladies really, really need to start calling for male birth control. Why the hell should we be the only ones to bear the pain, low libido, and all the other ills of contraception? Men have a stake in preventing/planning conception as well, they should have a bigger part in preventing it.
Any mustachian scientists willing to take that on?
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I just wanted to report that I cut my hair this morning. I was motivated by the price jumped from $45+tip/cut to $75+tip/cut over the past two years. I used a pair of scissors that came in a dog grooming kit. I watched a lot of youtube videos over the weekend. My hair isn't close to the salon cut I usually receive, but I also didn't have to shell out $90. AND I will improve! Thank you for all of the help and encouragement!
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My single biggest impact to less spending on lady things (hair, mostly, but any shopping at all), was simply having NO time available when the stores / shops are opened. I stopped cutting my hair as I simply was not available during the day, I am picky about new hairdressers, and have therefore been growing it long. I am actively reading about how to cut your own hair, as it is time for a trim.
I own tweezers, a razor and buy replacement conditioner, foundation and skin cream that is a simple replacement of what I already have. (No multiples sitting in drawers / part used supplies, etc). It is amazing how long the makeup and girly products last when you try to use all of them.
Why? Second job or extended overtime work (more money!) coupled with household chores and kids / family activity (to suck up the 1/2 day remaining on the weekend).
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I gave myself a haircut using the ponytail method last week. The first time, I cut off barely an inch. It wasn't enough to make any difference, but it showed me that DIY wouldn't *necessarily* look terrible and the scissors would not go crazy in my hands. I did two inches the next time. It came out wavy in long layers and looks good. Maybe not as good as a good salon cut, but for the time and effort (and cost) involved, it's great! We had a cheap pair of hair scissors from when DH used to trim his own hair. (He now buzzes it.)
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Just gave my hair a trim last night, because it was time. (The ends felt nasty.) I keep my hair on the longer side so that it a) hides problems a bit better (I can always pull it up for a couple of weeks) and b) if I have a "whoops", I can always just go a little shorter than intended.
I'm much better at cutting my husband's hair than my own. It's difficult to get layers in my own hair which look good. Mine's also much thicker, though.
One thing that's helped me stop wearing makeup most of the time is the fact that my husband has told me many, many times that he prefers it when I don't wear makeup. Having talked to other male friends since, many of them have said the same thing about their own wives/girlfriends. The "need" many women have to wear makeup to look good is purely in their own heads.
Which is not to say that I'm totally against makeup. It's fun to play around with sometimes. I still wear some when we go out on our (very rare) dates, or to functions like weddings. But for day-to-day, I leave it off. Might be part of the reason people think I look at least 5 years younger than I am.
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Just finished reading through this whole thing; some great solutions for Lady MMM issues here!
One thing I didn't see was any mention of convertible/multiuse clothing. I've been interested in this for traveling/minimalist/environmental reasons but it would certainly convert to some saved $$ too.
Here are some I have come across (note I only own the magic wrap skirt and a homemade sort-of infinity dress, don't work for any of these companies etc.):
http://www.wrapmagicskirts.com/index.html
http://www.finecraftguild.com/womens-cardigan/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocktYJSP__U
http://cameleonclothes.webs.com
http://travelfashiongirl.com/versalette-convertible-travel-clothing/
The infinity dress (a million links for this!)
http://hipknoties.com
http://www.tourintune.com/the-ultimate-multifunctional-dress-for-travel/
and I'm sure there are more I haven't found yet.
Seems like this would cut down on having a big wardrobe, they can be creatively refashioned so you won't get bored, size isn't an issue (at least as much, maybe only for huge changes in weight, some even use through pregnancy), great for reducing traveling needs, and reduce the need to buy more clothes. Even if you can only wear something 5 ways and not the 100 they claim that still seems like a win to me!
Some of them are a bit pricey; I've been thinking of playing around and making my own at some point (mostly just don't have time now); I've come across several how-to's around the web. I'm sure used ones can be found on ebay/thrift stores too (I got my magic wrap dress on ebay for about 30$, also made of reused material).
Anyone have any experience with any of these?
Also about clothes: it only just occurred to me the other day that if you wear several layers/outfits onto a plane you could potentially save on suitcase space and/or luggage fees. The only things I could find out this after googling were the crazy people who wore 70 shirts or something and look ridiculous. I was thinking something a little more subtle....like 2-3 pairs of underwear, 2-3 pairs of socks, 2 pairs of pants, a couple shirts and undershirts, 2 jackets, or 2 skirts and a dress. Basically you want to be comfortable and not overheated and not look suspicious to the TSA. I'm flying home for thanksgiving so I might try this out just for kicks (I have plenty of clothes at home still and I was only ever going to take a carry on) and for future trips. I'll post a follow up.
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There is a guy that brings a spare pair of underwear and otherwise not much while traveling it might be this guy but I'll look more closely on a computer later. http://www.rtwblog.com
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Also about clothes: it only just occurred to me the other day that if you wear several layers/outfits onto a plane you could potentially save on suitcase space and/or luggage fees. The only things I could find out this after googling were the crazy people who wore 70 shirts or something and look ridiculous. I was thinking something a little more subtle....like 2-3 pairs of underwear, 2-3 pairs of socks, 2 pairs of pants, a couple shirts and undershirts, 2 jackets, or 2 skirts and a dress. Basically you want to be comfortable and not overheated and not look suspicious to the TSA. I'm flying home for thanksgiving so I might try this out just for kicks (I have plenty of clothes at home still and I was only ever going to take a carry on) and for future trips. I'll post a follow up.
i've never taken it this far, but i always wear my heaviest clothes/several layers on the plane because (1) planes are always cold as fuck (2) suitcase space. i've pretty much sworn off ever checking a bag again -- there's no need to if you pack carefully. i went on a month-long trip last winter to south africa and brazil with a carry on, no problem.
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Yep, this is definitely the guy. Watch the video here -
http://www.rtwblog.com/2010/08/how-to-pack-for-a-journey-with-no-luggage/
I love that he brings safety pins just in case. For clothing he does this:
Given that I’ll wear cargo pants, a travel jacket/vest, socks, underwear, and a short-sleeved t-shirt under a long-sleeved pullover on a typical day of the trip, I’ll keep one spare t-shirt, two extra pairs of socks, and one spare pair of underwear in my pockets. Each night I’ll wash the day’s socks, underwear and t-shirt in the hotel/hostel sink (note detergent below), and these items should usually be dry enough to pack or wear by morning. I’m guessing I’ll wash the cargo pants about once a week.
And he brings soap and stuff.
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I was thinking about project 333... you know 33 items of clothing, including undergarments and socks,--it is pretty insane.
Then I started to compare it to what I normally pack for a 3-4 day trip -- e.g., the carry on is half empty. Definitely able to travel for 2 weeks with one carry-on, and I have gone on a three day / overnight trip with just a large purse. (pair of pants, tshirt, swimsuit and underwear rolled up at the bottom, small cosmetics / toothbrush bag, wear sweater and coat on board--, one pair of shoes was the only hard part).
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I tried project 333 during the last part of my pregnancy. I really enjoyed it. In the original rules, undergarments, socks and workout gear are not included. she does include her purse and laptop bag, which felt weird to me, maybe because I'm not a bag-as-accessory person. Counting the thrifted book bag I use to carry my stuff to and from work on my bike as clothing made about as much sense as counting my lunch box, or my helmet. I see them more as tools than as items of clothing. Project 333 encourages you to modify the rules to your taste, the point is to experiment with dressing with less, it really is fun when you give it a go.
I like the ideas of convertible clothing in theory, but in practice I prefer a more structured style of clothing. They all seem to be suited to a drapey-flowy aesthetic that doesn't really suit me. I guess I'd rather just wear the same thing that I really like than trying to recreate my clothes everyday. Maybe one day I'll try something like this http://www.theuniformproject.com (http://www.theuniformproject.com). I definitely have been thinking a lot about the way I wear clothing these days.
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Has anyone used an IUD? I'm thinking of switching from the pill to an IUD. I'm really intrigued by the copper/hormone-free one.
That's the one I got, and so far so good. I haven't had any kids so the insertion was very painful. Like a menstrual cramp but very localized. But the whole procedure only takes like 15 minutes so it wasn't that bad. Mine was completely free with my insurance, so that's a big plus over a lot of other options.
I had to go with the copper one because I don't do well with hormones (migraines, weight gain, etc). This is about the only highly-effective option then. My first period after the insertion was about two days longer and just a little heavier, but I could deal with it. The only negative was some extra cramps a few weeks after the insertion, but after getting an ultrasound it was because of a cyst on my ovary and not because of the IUD.
I think IUDs are a really good choice because they are very effective and are often free with insurance. Hope this helps!
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I don't have a budget for girly things really, other than henna.
got a tubal. No side effects 3 years later. I got mine with no progeny but I hear most people have to have three before they're allowed- BS.
When I bother to do nails, I use a clear coat strengthener because I can't stand obvious chipping.
I use henna and indigo for a warm dark brown hair that no one thinks is dye. I've been doing it 5 years. Only 4x a year. I don't have grays. But I've heard/read it's great for them.
I use baking soda as shampoo and vinegar as conditioner. After 5 years, hair only needs a washing once a week. Get compliments on my hair. I clip it up, or braid it. free flow on fancy occasions. It's mid back length.
I use coconut oil from Costco as lotion and chap stick.even brought a little tub to work.
I have high quality mineral make-up I use about as often as I shave my legs. I plan to use it until it's gone, damn supposed expiration dates. If you wear it all the time, you start to need it. If you're healthy, you'll glow without help.
I hate clothes shopping. Second hand all the way. I have sewing skills for adjustments.
I tweeze my own brows, never waxed anywhere. I shave my pits to keep natural BO down. I shave my legs when I feel like it (4-8 x a year). TMI warning: I shave the "lick zone" and buzz the mons.
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We ladies really, really need to start calling for male birth control. Why the hell should we be the only ones to bear the pain, low libido, and all the other ills of contraception? Men have a stake in preventing/planning conception as well, they should have a bigger part in preventing it.
Any mustachian scientists willing to take that on?
There's a pretty promising sounding option under testing now. Actually a similar thing has been in clinical trials for 15 years in India, not sure why that hasn't been long enough to get it going for real... I haven't read up on it recently just remembered hearing about it years ago and thinking it sounded cool. Some kind of long lasting gel polymer that gets injected and blocks the tubes, works like a vasectomy. But it's reversible, because they can inject something else that dissolves it. Non-invasive, non-hormonal, lasts a long time, reversible and relatively inexpensive. Here's hoping they make it happen!
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2014/09/09/we-ll-have-male-birth-control-by-2017.html
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So, I took the plunge a couple of weeks ago and went no 'poo. I've tried it before but it was AWFUL. My hair ended up stringy and dry at the ends, miserably greasy at the roots. I did way more research this time around and realized that part of my problem is hard water (can't do much about that in our rental) and part of it was that I was trying to do no 'poo the same way I used shampoo--that is, washing my hair too frequently.
Well, this time around I've only washed my hair 3 times in two weeks (plus, once with a homemade dry shampoo made of arrowroot powder) and it's finally working! My hair got that slippery feeling when I washed it last night, rather than still feeling a bit dirty. The greasiness is totally gone and my hair looks shiny and healthy, feels soft and isn't super tangly.
In the last year I've started having to change my shampoo each time I needed a new bottle because while things would start off really well, by the end of the bottle my hair would be getting greasy really fast. I tried a huge variety of shampoos too, from cheapest to a really expensive (supposedly) earth-friendly one. So I decided to give this another try, since shampoo clearly was not doing me any favors.
My husband told me I'm strange, but I might try to turn him into a convert once we start seeing long-term results.
Baking soda and vinegar for the win!
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We ladies really, really need to start calling for male birth control. Why the hell should we be the only ones to bear the pain, low libido, and all the other ills of contraception? Men have a stake in preventing/planning conception as well, they should have a bigger part in preventing it.
Any mustachian scientists willing to take that on?
There's a pretty promising sounding option under testing now. Actually a similar thing has been in clinical trials for 15 years in India, not sure why that hasn't been long enough to get it going for real... I haven't read up on it recently just remembered hearing about it years ago and thinking it sounded cool. Some kind of long lasting gel polymer that gets injected and blocks the tubes, works like a vasectomy. But it's reversible, because they can inject something else that dissolves it. Non-invasive, non-hormonal, lasts a long time, reversible and relatively inexpensive. Here's hoping they make it happen!
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2014/09/09/we-ll-have-male-birth-control-by-2017.html
I remember reading that about 10 years ago! Will it never come to be?
Here's a whole website dedicated to explaining various male contraceptive methods/research going on out there.
http://www.malecontraceptives.org/
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Yep, this is definitely the guy. Watch the video here -
http://www.rtwblog.com/2010/08/how-to-pack-for-a-journey-with-no-luggage/
I love that he brings safety pins just in case. For clothing he does this:
Given that I’ll wear cargo pants, a travel jacket/vest, socks, underwear, and a short-sleeved t-shirt under a long-sleeved pullover on a typical day of the trip, I’ll keep one spare t-shirt, two extra pairs of socks, and one spare pair of underwear in my pockets. Each night I’ll wash the day’s socks, underwear and t-shirt in the hotel/hostel sink (note detergent below), and these items should usually be dry enough to pack or wear by morning. I’m guessing I’ll wash the cargo pants about once a week.
And he brings soap and stuff.
Cool, that seems really great for traveling.
As for my own experience, I wore a dress, a skirt, 2 bras, 2 undertanks, and a nice top. I was really surprised at how even that saved a good amount of space on my carryon. And I was actually mostly warm on the plane! I'm definitely doing this as a 'thing' from now on.
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Onto the period thing....this is the second time I've heard of the menstrual cup. I haven't quite been able to make that leap yet. But I've heard awesome things about them. And I know it would cut down on costs of buying tampons and pads.
I vouch for this!
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Hi everyone, I love the tips in this thread! Some things I do to keep costs down:
I use bar soap only, it's unbelievable how expensive body wash is (and how much plastic waste it requires!). I buy a pack of 15 bars of soap and I'm good for almost a year. "
I use baby shampoo for my body-wash and face-wash now. The big bottles have a pump at the top, and it costs about 6$ for the regular Johnson and Johnson big bottle.
Even with using it for the 3 boys and myself its lasted about 6 months.
Bonus? Smells like baby powder, so everyone thinks I smell lovely. :)
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Can anyone recommend good online shops (that ship outside of the US) for work shirts? This is one thing I am willing to spend a fair amount on - the best I could find last time I looked was over $100 on sale and I didn't even like the fabric.
LAND's END has sales. All sorts of button up tops.
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One thing I didn't see was any mention of convertible/multiuse clothing. I've been interested in this for traveling/minimalist/environmental reasons but it would certainly convert to some saved $$ too.
http://www.wrapmagicskirts.com/index.html
I bought a bunch of these wholesale on ebay. They end up being about $4-6 apiece. I don't get to pick colors, and I end up buying probably at least 10 at a time, but the great thing about wrap skirts is they pretty much last forever and they'll always fit (and if you buy in bulk you can always just pick out the ones you like and then resell or donate the rest). I don't use them as a multi-function item of clothing - as far as I'm concerned they're just skirts, but I pretty much wear one every day. My office is fairly casual as far as dress codes go, so I pair a skirt with a solid color t-shirt every day and that's pretty much 99% of my wardrobe. In winter I add a coat and leggings for warmth, and switch from sandals to boots, but otherwise my outfits are the same. I save a lot of time in the mornings, but the bold patterns and colors of the skirts mean that I don't look like I'm wearing a personal uniform.
As far as other money saving stuff goes - I cut my own hair, and I don't usually wear much make-up (but I'm religious with my moisturizer and chap stick). I got a mirena IUD about a year ago and I've pretty much stopped having periods, so that's a huge time and money saver.
It's funny because for the most part I didn't do most of these things in the first place to save money. A lot of it was just about finding the most efficient ways to do things. Like the clothes - I prefer to wear the same thing every day because it's simpler, but I don't like to *look* like I'm wearing the same thing, and I don't want to have to worry about things not fitting right if my weight fluctuates a little. I cut my own hair because I've never liked the hassle of going to a hair dresser on a regular basis - at first I just started trimming my own bangs between appointments, and then I went and started doing it all myself. I probably haven't seen a hair dresser in at least 3 years. That a lot of my choices end up being cheap is just a bonus :)