What is the wattage on the 9 bulbs? You could replace them with all with CFL's that are actually 11 Watts - they say "equivalent to 40 watts" on them. Then realize all 9 of them equal one 100 watt bulb, and stop fighting with your SO b/c that is not a big deal.
Light bulbs are mentioned as a quick way to reduce your electric bill, but. They really aren't that big of a deal. You are annoyed over pennies. What matters is your refrigerator, dishwasher, AC, hot water heater, dryer (if those are electric.). And of course, just having a big house.