Author Topic: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?  (Read 12622 times)

JoJo

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #50 on: May 15, 2015, 03:45:22 PM »
My sister & her husband home school their kids for religious reasons.  They do participate in church activities so they get other kid interaction.

Overall they are very well behaved and smart.  My biggest fear is that the father is really set in his religious and anti-govt ways so he is constantly teaching them pro-gun, pro-war, anti-abortion, anti-LGBT, anti-evolution, anti-obamacare, anti-any religion but christianity, you get the drift.  The son is 12 and is considering engineering but will really struggle with liberal college life.

Sid Hoffman

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #51 on: May 15, 2015, 04:13:14 PM »
^^^ That's pretty extreme, but also keep in mind that the more strictly parent try to raise their kids, the more fiercely their kids tend to rebel against them.  There's many cases of this.  Katy Perry always comes to mind.  :)

Giro

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #52 on: May 19, 2015, 01:09:59 PM »
I think it comes down to one thing.  Good people raise good children regardless of where they go to school.

And isn't that what's important.  Yes, I want my kid to get a really good degree that leads to a great job.  But, more importantly, I want my child to be a good person.   

Cressida

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #53 on: May 19, 2015, 06:01:20 PM »
Is it just me or do we expect kids to routinely deal with stuff that we as adults would never tolerate? I can't say that I'm ever really teased as an adult - most workplaces would never tolerate that, and I simply wouldn't bother with the presence of anyone who did that anywhere else. Good natured jibes among friends, or the very occasional stray comment from a stranger, sure... but being forced, everyday, to sit next to someone who was deliberately cruel for their own enjoyment? What sort of adulthood are we trying to prepare them for?

+10

asiljoy

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #54 on: May 26, 2015, 08:29:38 AM »
Also, one of the best ways for people to learn (backed by research) is called peer learning, where by questioning and reasoning with each other a group of students gets to an answer together (and - potentially - finds more creative solutions to existing problems); you cannot easily have this in a homeschooling situation.

I thought the research was actually leaning the other way now, or at least gave more room for ambiguity in that many people, myself included, do terrible in group settings. The thought being that group settings foster situations where only the loudest voices are heard, and generally, thinking stops once a solution is 'found' or voiced by any one person in the group; people stop thinking when they 'know' other people are going to do it or when they can hide in a group. Going against the grain is hard in any environment and most people don't realize when they're just bobble-heading it. When I need to get the best out of my teams, I actually avoid group meetings, instead forcing people to answer my questions individually via email/phone calls. If consensus is needed for whatever reason, I only call a meeting once I have compiled a list of possible answers/issues.

Frugal_NYC

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #55 on: May 27, 2015, 12:40:56 PM »
I grew up in neighborhoods with homeschool kids here and there and us kids would always think it was weird/felt bad for them.  You can't beat the experience of school - it's your first taste of independence.  You get to meet all types of kids that you wouldn't be exposed to in Mommy's homeschool support group.  You take your lumps (literally and figuratively) and then you can come home everyday and tell your parents what you love and what you don't.  I couldn't imagine not going out to the playground for recess with hundreds of my peers and having fun.

Edit: coming from Military baby who went to public schools in Cali, GA, MD, and Long Island...
« Last Edit: May 27, 2015, 12:45:49 PM by Frugal_NYC »

thegradwife

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #56 on: May 29, 2015, 01:26:22 PM »
As an adult who was homeschooled I think homeschoolers have a lot of "grit".

Many are raised that if the normal way isn't working, then it is our job to find another way. I and many of my friends were also raised that yes we are weird. We are weird because we don't go to school. We are weird because we different interest and do not always follow social norms. But we were also taught that being weird and different is okay and we should be proud of it. I have no problem standing up for myself but at the same time I don't criticize those who think or act differently. Choices are personal.

As for high school and college.

I went to public high school and then college.
My younger sister did duel enrollment during high school. She graduated at 17 with two free years of college and a cna degree. She then went on to triple major in neuroscience, spanish, and biochemistry on a full scholarship. She isn't sure what she wants to do next when she graduates in December.
My brother graduated from high school at 15 and went to college. He did his GEs on a full scholarship before traveling around the world at 18. He is now back in college.
My youngest brother wanted to be in public school, so he grew up in the public school system. He graduated high school with a year of college done.

3% of all kids are homeschooled at any point. You probably know some and just don't know because you haven't asked them. Most homeschoolers are totally normal people that go to college and live happy lives - just like public school kids.

Tasty Pinecones

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #57 on: May 05, 2017, 06:40:47 AM »
My sister & her husband home school their kids for religious reasons.  They do participate in church activities so they get other kid interaction.

Overall they are very well behaved and smart.  My biggest fear is that the father is really set in his religious and anti-govt ways so he is constantly teaching them pro-gun, pro-war, anti-abortion, anti-LGBT, anti-evolution, anti-obamacare, anti-any religion but christianity, you get the drift.  The son is 12 and is considering engineering but will really struggle with liberal college life.

I "knew" this kid. Went the engineering path. Arrived at college, unaware of most pop-culture topics b/c he was not allowed to watch TV or movies that weren't Christian based. His internet was apparently curtailed too at home. He was college age but quite naive about many, many things. Awkward too. Clearly his parents ruled his world.

He did very well in his studies and was eager to learn but was quite naive about everything else. He entered adult life eyes wide open but he was clearly "different" and at risk IMHO for being taken advantage of. Like dealing with an Amish youth.

I like the idea of homeschooling but not for the purposes of isolation of your children. It can be done right but the only children I know well was homeschooled for religious isolation purposes. A couple more I know are being homeschooled for partly religious reasons but I don't know that they are being very academically challenged.
« Last Edit: May 05, 2017, 04:52:15 PM by Tasty Pinecones »

golden1

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #58 on: May 21, 2017, 06:37:40 PM »
I had the same experience with an engineering home schooled student at my college.  She acted about 12 and wore, I kid you not, a Koala bear back pack to class. 

I think that there is a place for homeschooling, but I don't really see the homeschooling/public school thing as an either/or.  I tend to supplement my kids schooling with educational experiences and discussion at home.  One of the real reasons I am a big proponent of public school is the fact that the educational experience is a communal one where it may not be ideal for my kid.  I think it is important to understand that not everything in life is going to be tailored to your learning style.  Like I said, if something the school is not working, we supplement ourselves. 

dleavitt

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Re: Does homeschooling rob kids of grit?
« Reply #59 on: May 23, 2017, 02:50:27 PM »
Background: public school K-5, private school 6-12.  Also have a MA in Teaching, and spent two years teaching in public schools (1 year in a high school, one in middle school) as part of that degree.

Like many others have posted, school was a bore for me.  Part of the reason I transitioned to a private school was for the additional academic challenges afforded there.  My senior year of high school I only took two classes and already had the equivalent of a full year of college credits between AP exams and dual-enrollment.  With the exception of the AP courses, I spent most of my time playing cards with a few similarly inclined friends (Rook was our game of choice).

Since I didn't go to public middle or high school I don't have a direct comparison to say if things have changed, but with my experience teaching in those settings I do begin question whether sending them to a public school actually be harmful.  Apathetic (or plain burned-out) teachers, apathetic administration, and genuinely dangerous fellow "students".  School may not be a prison, but far too many of the kids attending need to be in one.

Obviously, not all schools are the same.  The school our daughters would go to is rated highly, and as a major contributing factor in choosing where to live.  Still, I struggle with the decision.  I will likely see if I can take a few days and "shadow" to see what things are like...