I think you are at the last stage of a significant readjustment of your expectations, and I think you posted here because you are finally ready to take that last step -- you know what the right answer is, you just need to hear it from someone else. Right? 15 years ago, like a lot of other people, you had great dreams of a big life. And then that went down the toilet, and you've been hanging on and clawing back. You have made a number of changes, cutting back expenses, taking on renters, etc., but you have still been clinging to the idea of the big family home where everyone gathers. Because it is a wonderful vision, and you worked hard to achieve that!
But for right now, you need to be realistic and face the numbers head-on. You haven't provided all of the numbers, so we can't give too much detail here. But you need to look at what that big house is actually costing you every month -- including how much more you'd need to pay to actually own it in the future. What is the mortgage, what would the principle be on a regular mortgage, what are the utilities, what are the property taxes, what is the upkeep, what is the insurance, etc. etc. etc. Consider the good things, too -- subtract out the rent you receive and the tax benefits you get. The net is what you are paying, every month, for the privilege of maintaining the dream of the big family home.* Is it worth it? How many more years would you need to work to achieve that dream? And is it worth it to have that big family home, if you are so busy working you don't actually get to enjoy time with that family?
I know this is hard. I am around your age, which means I am old enough to have seen several dreams crushed, and to have had to mourn those losses and find a way to move on. But what I can tell you is that life is always changing, and nothing is forever. Because I was able to cut the ties to those old dreams and move on to whatever the next big unknown phase, I was able to find new dreams and a life I love and now wouldn't give up for anything. It looks very different than I thought it would 20+ years ago, but it is no less satisfying.
So embrace the unknown. Make the best financial decision for you, right now, even when it hurts. And do so trusting that you will have the power to shape a good, satisfying future. You have a great financial situation without the house! You make plenty of money to do very well by yourself -- and you have a pension coming later as a backstop! Believe you can do this, take your power back, and start putting your considerable resources into building that new, different future instead of continuing to try to sustain an unsustainable past.
*You are telling yourself that you are hanging on as an "investment" -- that the market will come back and you will make that huge profit you dreamed of. This is called "speculation," not investing -- and if you are as risk-averse as you say you are, well, speculating is about as risky as you can get. Again, look at how much that house is costing you every month, and multiply by 12 -- and then multiply by the 14 years you've been waiting. That's how much you've paid to keep that dream of a big sale alive. How's that worked out so far? There is no reason to believe the housing market is going to dramatically turn around in the near future, especially if as you say the local economy is slowing. Or to look at it another way: if you didn't currently own the house but had the cash to buy it for the amount of equity you currently have in it, is that how you'd choose to invest? If you wouldn't buy it again now as a good investment, it's not a good investment, and it's time to cut your losses.