Author Topic: Who should I be mad at?  (Read 10290 times)

clifford4970

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Who should I be mad at?
« on: August 01, 2015, 10:12:03 AM »
Last night my wife and I were talking with some friends about life.
My wife and I both work full time and go to school full time.  We have to take early morning classes and late night classes to work around our jobs.  The only time we really get to see each other during the week is on the weekends when we are both doing our homework.  We are quite frugal and try to save as much as we can while paying for school out of pocket.  We fill out Fafsa every year and never receive any Grant money.
While talking with our friends, the topic of school came up.  They asked if we had taken out any student loans and we told them no.  We went on to tell them how difficult it has been to pay for school out of pocket and many of the things we have given up to do so.  They went on to tell us how much they receive in grants.  I don't know if I believe this, but they said they received $18,000 this year.  They both work..... about 10 hours a week..... for extra spending money.... They pretty much do as they please.  Go out to eat, buy what they want, and go on trips.  I figured they were piling up debt, but then it hit me, they are getting paid to go to school.  I didn't know who to be mad at.  I honestly felt like crying because I felt as if I have been cheated in a way.  I have worked soooo hard to pay for school.  My wife has worked sooooo hard to pay for school.  We have sacrificed time that we could be spending with each other to work and to go to school early in the morning or really late at night.  The semesters are hard on us because we are both sleep deprived, mentally exhausted and truthfully I miss my wife during those long 16 weeks.

I dont know if this is more of a rant, or my original question of "who should i be mad at".  Should I be mad at my friends?  Should I be mad at myself?  Should I be mad at the education system.  I guess I am just dumbfounded and sad........ Sorry for the rambling.
I dont want to take advantage of anything, but how can I get some of that pie?

forummm

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #1 on: August 01, 2015, 10:25:27 AM »
The FAFSA equations are public so you can see why you aren't getting anything. Your friends can't be getting more than $5775 for the upcoming academic year in federal grants. But they could be getting more from the university they attend (perhaps all of it from the university and none from the government). The university decides how much to give and to whom, so who knows why they are getting more than you are.

https://studentaid.ed.gov/sa/types/grants-scholarships/pell

clifford4970

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #2 on: August 01, 2015, 10:27:13 AM »
Thanks forummm.  I will go take a look.  Appreciate the response.

sol

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #3 on: August 01, 2015, 10:36:15 AM »
Are you graduate students?  It's fairly common for there to be enormous discrepancies in compensation for graduate students between fields.  Some of my friends in grad school were getting $38k/year in federal grants plus free tuition on top of that (scientists) and some were getting zero and paying their own tuition (history or languages).  So if you're an art history grad student and your friends are engineers, this is exactly the kind of situation I would expect to see.

If you're undergrads, it's even worse.  Scholarship money makes all the difference, and it's not all need-based.  The smartest kids always go to college for free, regardless of financial need.  I can see how an average student would think that's unfair.

clifford4970

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #4 on: August 01, 2015, 10:41:58 AM »
Are you graduate students?  It's fairly common for there to be enormous discrepancies in compensation for graduate students between fields.  Some of my friends in grad school were getting $38k/year in federal grants plus free tuition on top of that (scientists) and some were getting zero and paying their own tuition (history or languages).  So if you're an art history grad student and your friends are engineers, this is exactly the kind of situation I would expect to see.

If you're undergrads, it's even worse.  Scholarship money makes all the difference, and it's not all need-based.  The smartest kids always go to college for free, regardless of financial need.  I can see how an average student would think that's unfair.

I am an undergrad.  My degree is Communication Social and Organizational Structure.  My friend is also and undergrad and is going to school to become a teacher. 

johnny847

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #5 on: August 01, 2015, 10:43:52 AM »
Trying to figure out who to be mad at, and subsequently being mad at them, is not going to help you in any way whatsoever.


What is constructive is looking at the resources that forummm linked.


If you're undergrads, it's even worse.  Scholarship money makes all the difference, and it's not all need-based.  The smartest kids always go to college for free, regardless of financial need.  I can see how an average student would think that's unfair.

Or sometimes different fields just have more scholarship opportunities.

Zamboni

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #6 on: August 01, 2015, 10:46:56 AM »
Yeah, that is rough. The FAFSA looks at what you made last year to determine how much you will pay this year, so the system does penalize those who work the year before starting school and then again you get penalized the next year if you work and make decent money while you go to school. Don't be mad at your friend, though; they may have special grants for those who want to teach based upon a qualified teacher shortage.

You should consider calling your school's financial aid office to tell them you need some grants. Also talk to people in your departments and majors. Basically tell them all you can't keep up this pace and without some grants you will be forced to take time off from school and at a minimum it will delay graduation indefinitely.

If they suggest loans, claim a religious objection to debt (seriously.) Be sure to submit the FAFSA at the first possible moment and talk with them several times (don't take no for an answer if you get that the first time; try and try again.) Basically when it comes time to award that grant money, you want them to be thinking of your names. There are are random small grants to be had this way. As soon as you get the letter back from them about aid, if there is no grant money, call them to complain and tell your story of woe. If you wait and submit the FAFSA late in the application cycle, then there is also a chance the grant money will be gone.

Also, I don't know your ages, but parental income is typically factored in for undergraduates (even if parents won't pay anything.)

Good luck!

little_brown_dog

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #7 on: August 01, 2015, 10:47:08 AM »
sounds like your expected family contribution (EFC) is too high for federal aid, and you do not meet the necessary qualifiers for aid offered through the school. school based qualifiers for grants and scholarships typically include things like income/expected contribution, merit (GPA), field of study, and membership in an underrepresented group. if you are a middle class, white American male with average to good grades, and studying psychology you are out of luck. if you are a poor kid with a 4.0 gpa studying electrical engineering you are probably going to fare better.

wordnerd

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #8 on: August 01, 2015, 10:54:00 AM »
I don't doubt your friends could get $18k in grants, especially if it's a private school. I was offered that level of aid as an undergrad to attend private schools, but chose to go to a (still-cheaper) public school with no grants. As others have mentioned, field matters a lot too. If your friend is planning to become a STEM teacher, he/she may've found grants for that.

Moving forward, I'd recommend you (1) analyze your situation (if you can get aid with working less, that maybe the right choice),(2) go talk to the financial office to see if there university-specific grants you qualify for, and (3) pat yourself on the back. You and your wife are getting through school debt-free through a lot of hard work. That's badass and will pay dividends for years to come.

yourusernamehere

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Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #9 on: August 01, 2015, 01:16:42 PM »
Moving forward, I'd recommend you (1) analyze your situation (if you can get aid with working less, that maybe the right choice),(2) go talk to the financial office to see if there university-specific grants you qualify for, and (3) pat yourself on the back. You and your wife are getting through school debt-free through a lot of hard work. That's badass and will pay dividends for years to come.

+1

Don't underestimate the permanent advantage you get from working your ass off. How easy life will seem once it's done! How satisfied you will be that you did it on your own through hard work! Instead of getting angry with your friends you can learn from their experience and possibly optimize your own even more. That is a fine opportunity that many wouldn't even notice.

(Edited for stupidly forgetting entire words.)

Psychstache

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #10 on: August 01, 2015, 03:23:13 PM »
Moving forward, I'd recommend you (1) analyze your situation (if you can get aid with working less, that maybe the right choice),(2) go talk to the financial office to see if there university-specific grants you qualify for, and (3) pat yourself on the back. You and your wife are getting through school debt-free through a lot of hard work. That's badass and will pay dividends for years to come.

+1

Don't underestimate the permanent advantage you get from working your ass off. How easy life will seem once it's done! How satisfied you will be that you did it on your own through hard work! Instead of getting angry with your friends you can learn from their experience and possibly optimize your own even more. That is a fine opportunity that many wouldn't even notice.

(Edited for stupidly forgetting entire words.)

+2

I worked two jobs while going to school full time plus (15-18 hours every semester and 12 in the summer). While sometimes I look back and I feel resentful/jealous of friends who had an easier time, I have never struggled with a workload in my career because I know what it really means to work hard. I have colleagues who sometimes complain about how hard our job is or how bad the workload is and that they have to take work home all the time, and I just have to find a way out of the conversation because my work life now is a cakewalk compared to those dark college days.

Chalk it up to temporary hardship and character building and move on with your life.

P.S. if they are doing whatever they want, they are probably going up into a pile of debt, grants or no.

coffeehound

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #11 on: August 01, 2015, 04:08:07 PM »
Be mad at yourself for wasting precious time and energy on this question, and for being a complainypants.

You and your wife are building muscles and skills that will make you infinitely more resilient to life's ups and downs than your friends. Yes, look for ways to get more in the way of financial assistance from the school, and perhaps consider whether or not your friend is (maybe/perhaps/could be) exaggerating about how much of that financial aid is grants and how much is loans.  Also, if you and your wife are close to graduation, do a little math/research into careers and salary - student loans are not necessarily evil if they are subsidized, and help you finish your degree faster AND lead to a job with a salary that allows you to quickly pay back the loan.

TL;DR: Facepunch + tough love.  You'll be fine and your friends may not be in as great a situation as it sounds.

use2betrix

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #12 on: August 01, 2015, 04:26:14 PM »
What's the difference between them getting grants or their parents paying for it? Life isn't fair, sooner you move past that and realize you are 100% in charge of your success, or lack thereof, you will be much better off.

forummm

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #13 on: August 01, 2015, 04:37:33 PM »
Moving forward, I'd recommend you (1) analyze your situation (if you can get aid with working less, that maybe the right choice),(2) go talk to the financial office to see if there university-specific grants you qualify for, and (3) pat yourself on the back. You and your wife are getting through school debt-free through a lot of hard work. That's badass and will pay dividends for years to come.

+1

Don't underestimate the permanent advantage you get from working your ass off. How easy life will seem once it's done! How satisfied you will be that you did it on your own through hard work! Instead of getting angry with your friends you can learn from their experience and possibly optimize your own even more. That is a fine opportunity that many wouldn't even notice.

(Edited for stupidly forgetting entire words.)

+2

I worked two jobs while going to school full time plus (15-18 hours every semester and 12 in the summer). While sometimes I look back and I feel resentful/jealous of friends who had an easier time, I have never struggled with a workload in my career because I know what it really means to work hard. I have colleagues who sometimes complain about how hard our job is or how bad the workload is and that they have to take work home all the time, and I just have to find a way out of the conversation because my work life now is a cakewalk compared to those dark college days.

Chalk it up to temporary hardship and character building and move on with your life.

P.S. if they are doing whatever they want, they are probably going up into a pile of debt, grants or no.

+3 I graduated with a positive NW. And then quite a bit of savings after grad school due to working. Instead of starting $200k in the hole as many do, I was well on my way to FI before I finished my (long) time in school. And I think I had a lot of good character development lessons from the experience.

sol

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #14 on: August 01, 2015, 04:47:20 PM »
And I think I had a lot of good character development lessons from the experience.

That might be a stretch.  I certainly learned a ton in school, but I'm not sure character development was on that list.

clifford4970

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #15 on: August 01, 2015, 04:54:07 PM »
Be mad at yourself for wasting precious time and energy on this question, and for being a complainypants.

You and your wife are building muscles and skills that will make you infinitely more resilient to life's ups and downs than your friends. Yes, look for ways to get more in the way of financial assistance from the school, and perhaps consider whether or not your friend is (maybe/perhaps/could be) exaggerating about how much of that financial aid is grants and how much is loans.  Also, if you and your wife are close to graduation, do a little math/research into careers and salary - student loans are not necessarily evil if they are subsidized, and help you finish your degree faster AND lead to a job with a salary that allows you to quickly pay back the loan.

TL;DR: Facepunch + tough love.  You'll be fine and your friends may not be in as great a situation as it sounds.

Haha. The first part of this is a very good point.  I Guess it was just a post out of frustration and jealousy.  I appreciate everyone's feed back and comments.

Potterquilter

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #16 on: August 01, 2015, 05:14:45 PM »
They may have huge loans. $18,000 per year may not even pay tuition.

Like others here I worked full time and went to nursing school. At that time school was much cheaper I did not know you could get loans. Many of my fellow students were going on fabulous spring break vacations, drove nice cars and so on. It is really hard not to feel sorry for yourself.

But if you graduate debt free, what a fabulous accomplishment today.

All your life you will see big spenders.  We have a friend who graduated from a private school with a car and no debt. He continued the spending he had learned, driving fancy cars, eating out etc. and today at age 62 is bewildered that we left the workforce years ago and do things he cannot do like travel. If you learn discipline in spending early it will stay with you.

Hang in there

forummm

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #17 on: August 01, 2015, 05:22:23 PM »
And I think I had a lot of good character development lessons from the experience.

That might be a stretch.  I certainly learned a ton in school, but I'm not sure character development was on that list.

It may just be me, but I feel like I learned a lot about life and what life is like for other people due to putting myself through school. I learned how crappy a lot of low-wage jobs are and how difficult it is to get by on them--even without having kids. How insecure it is to be living paycheck-to-paycheck, and generally how hard it is to juggle work and school. I feel like I also gained a lot of confidence and personal satisfaction from my ability to actually graduate with two really challenging degrees while working full time for most of the time and not having help from my parents, and then heading off to grad school. YMMV.

sol

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #18 on: August 01, 2015, 05:28:15 PM »
It may just be me, but I feel like I learned a lot about life...

You clearly did not drink as much while in school as I did.

forummm

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #19 on: August 01, 2015, 07:24:45 PM »
It may just be me, but I feel like I learned a lot about life...

You clearly did not drink as much while in school as I did.

I didn't have time. And was more interested in other things. I had a very unusual college experience. I'm a very unusual person.

Sarnia Saver

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #20 on: August 01, 2015, 08:53:53 PM »
I had a similar question when I decided to go back to school after learning about my wife being pregnant.  I was mad at the system because my classmates were receiving EI checks, or at least OSAP while I was ineligible for financial assistance.  EI (employment insurance) was available for people who had been laid off, while OSAP (no-interest provincial loan) was there for people who had low income.  I could not get either of these so instead I worked 40 hours/week to provide for our household while taking the courses online in my off hours. 

After completing my course, I earned a job which provides for my family (now with two boys), allows my wife to be a stay at home mom, and provides us with the opportunity to achieve financial independence at a much earlier age than average.  We achieved this with minimal help outside of our own hard work, sacrifice, and compromise.  In the end, the programs that were in place are for people who need them, I didn't need them.  Would have been easier with them, but I succeeded without them, grew my muscles and got myself to a better place.  So will you.

Dee18

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #21 on: August 01, 2015, 11:44:05 PM »
If your friend is getting qualified to teach a STEM subject, there is quite a bit of targeted money available now.  But don't get mad, get money.  A lot of grants and scholarships are not based on need.  Be sure you have explored all those possibilities.  Check with the college financial aid office, your department, and any civic, corporate, or even national organizations that might have available money.  We had a discussion about this in one of my classes and two students mentioned they had scholarships from churches, another from a civic association. 

ShoulderThingThatGoesUp

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #22 on: August 02, 2015, 04:47:31 AM »
What are you going to do with a communication degree? The answer may be 'yourself.'

BlueHouse

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #23 on: August 02, 2015, 05:52:22 AM »
There was a guy on Shark Tank a few weeks ago who wrote an app to find all available scholarships. You plug in your demographics, major, age, and a lot of other info and see if there are scholarships available. He said there are millions of dollars in unpaid scholarships each year beacuse they are small private less known scholarships.
After a sibling died years ago, my mother created a scholarship fund that was so specific that most years, it wasn't paid out because few people knew about it or applied for it. It was a small sum 500 or 1000 per year I think, for boys from our high school who had lost their fathers while in their teens. That's it. No other qualifying metric.   There are tons and tons of those out there, but you need to search to find them.

The_path_less_taken

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #24 on: August 02, 2015, 08:16:49 AM »
Didn't real all the responses but:

I wouldn't be mad.

I'd be proud. You are MMM to the max, already, and at a  young age: kudos!

Is it fair? Fuck no! So many scholarship programs are little more than entitlement funds for whatever whim the person setting them up had at the time. If you can figure out how to get the free money, fine.

If not, you are currently DOING what everyone assumes is impossible.

So don't be mad. Be happy that you and your wife are that strong, that resourceful, and that you physically and mentally can do all that you do.

And remember: it ain't forever. You're in the home stretch now. Smooth sailing. And congratulations for being awesome.

clifford4970

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #25 on: August 02, 2015, 09:52:00 AM »
What are you going to do with a communication degree? The answer may be 'yourself.'

There are plenty of options out there if you have the right emphasis or get the correct certificates.  There is conflict management and dispute resolution.  Businesses often pay quite a hefty sum to have someone come tell them what is wrong with the business and its communication/conflict.  Also, knowing how to communicate effectively can open a lot of doors through networking ;)
I appreciate the concern, but I didn't take the path of least resistance while getting my Communication Degree. 
 

Goldielocks

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #26 on: August 02, 2015, 04:14:42 PM »
It is exceptionally unfair to not qualify based on parental income being too high, if parents are not contributing.  Now get over it.. Hopefully this meant your parents paid for more activities for you in high school thgan your friends...

Review your FAFSA formula...

You do qualify for unsubsidized Stafford loan, right?

You have options, including delaying or slowing down school to age out of the 'dependent' category, or getting married ( if you already intend to marry after school graduation, take a look at the money offset to do it now instead).

Maybe stopping work to focus on full time school completion in your 3rd year, to drive down income and qualify next year,  taking out a loan to get by in 3rd yr, then getting a grant in yr 4, paying off loan with it and completing those last few courses while working?  You need at least 60% course load to qualify for assistance,.. That should be easy for you to manage work and school.

Does your employer offer tuition assistance?  Even ones you have to pay back if you leave before 4 yrs can be treated as an interim loan, assuming you plan to leave... 

After reviewing all that, maybe you will decide that you would not choose to change anything after all.

Tyson

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #27 on: August 02, 2015, 04:49:58 PM »
Working hard/smart today and sacrificing for the future is kind of the whole point of the MMM philosophy.  Be glad you are learning these lessons early - they will serve you well in the medium and long term.

SomedayStache

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #28 on: August 03, 2015, 07:49:03 AM »
OP - I don't know what to tell you, but I share your frustration.  I've been out of school for 8 years but this still bothers me.  I was married also (so no claiming my parent's income) and I did receive around $4000 in grants each year.  You two must be making fairly decent money to receive no grants at all.  I think the difference may be that as a waittress I may not have claimed 100% of the tips I made, and my husband at the time was bringing in an income but was not paid in money...perhaps we would have been ineligible for grants had our financial situation been less murky.

I, too, worked my ass off to get through school and pay the bills.  I was a full-time engineering student working 35+ hours a week at my waitressing job and working crappy school jobs also.  I'd work a split shift (11am to 1pm, break, 5pm to 11pm) attend school, and stay up till 2am to finish my differential equations homework then drag myself to an 8am class.

At one point the stress caused me to get shingles.

I hear my co-workers talk about their fun college days, or even how much free time they had in school.  This does not compute to me.

I have friends who despite being in their 30s are still living in a house their parents pay for and getting a subsidized life.  Sometimes I get a bit jealous.

But you know what, I had a discussion with one of those friends about attending college out of state.  Apparently she had wanted to do so, but her parents wouldn't pay for it.  She had never had a job and had no idea how to support herself so she just did what her parents wanted.  At least you can take care of yourself!?

Maybe I shouldn't admit this here, but I do regret some of my choices during college.  I wish I had relaxed a bit more.  I wish I had taken advantage of all the great hiking and camping opportunities near my college because now I live in Oklahoma and getting to mountains takes hours of driving.  I wish I had enjoyed time with my husband because we got pregnant within a year of graduation and now it will be twenty years before we can take adult vacations or do spontaneous grown-up things that cost money.

Life isn't fair.  You are kicking ass and taking names. ...BUT Maybe enjoy yourself a bit more along the way?  (Hunkering down for the wrath of MMM devouts that shall probably fall on me now!)

Hall11235

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #29 on: August 03, 2015, 01:39:13 PM »
OP - I don't know what to tell you, but I share your frustration.  I've been out of school for 8 years but this still bothers me.  I was married also (so no claiming my parent's income) and I did receive around $4000 in grants each year.  You two must be making fairly decent money to receive no grants at all.  I think the difference may be that as a waittress I may not have claimed 100% of the tips I made, and my husband at the time was bringing in an income but was not paid in money...perhaps we would have been ineligible for grants had our financial situation been less murky.

I, too, worked my ass off to get through school and pay the bills.  I was a full-time engineering student working 35+ hours a week at my waitressing job and working crappy school jobs also.  I'd work a split shift (11am to 1pm, break, 5pm to 11pm) attend school, and stay up till 2am to finish my differential equations homework then drag myself to an 8am class.

At one point the stress caused me to get shingles.

I hear my co-workers talk about their fun college days, or even how much free time they had in school.  This does not compute to me.

I have friends who despite being in their 30s are still living in a house their parents pay for and getting a subsidized life.  Sometimes I get a bit jealous.

But you know what, I had a discussion with one of those friends about attending college out of state.  Apparently she had wanted to do so, but her parents wouldn't pay for it.  She had never had a job and had no idea how to support herself so she just did what her parents wanted.  At least you can take care of yourself!?

Maybe I shouldn't admit this here, but I do regret some of my choices during college.  I wish I had relaxed a bit more.  I wish I had taken advantage of all the great hiking and camping opportunities near my college because now I live in Oklahoma and getting to mountains takes hours of driving.  I wish I had enjoyed time with my husband because we got pregnant within a year of graduation and now it will be twenty years before we can take adult vacations or do spontaneous grown-up things that cost money.

Life isn't fair.  You are kicking ass and taking names. ...BUT Maybe enjoy yourself a bit more along the way?  (Hunkering down for the wrath of MMM devouts that shall probably fall on me now!)

No wrath here, my friend. I wish I had worked more in college. I was a two sport athlete and used training as an excuse to not work except during the summer, relying on loans and parents to pay my way through college.

I would do some scary things to take it all back and redo college...

For the OP: Stick with it. There are many people on this forum who wish they had frugal muscles the size of yours. Graduating with degrees debt free is one of the greatest and most inspiring things I think young people can do.

Giro

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #30 on: August 03, 2015, 03:38:15 PM »
I feel this frustration every year in April.  (gd dm effn taxs) But then I remember that my life is freaking awesome and I wouldn't trade it for any other life on the planet.

It's easy to look around with envy at situations you are assuming to know.  The grass is always greener..... they have new cars, new homes, pretty kids, big, fat grant checks ...idk whatever.  But often, that green grass is over a pile of wet, stinky manure.

I was a single mom of twins for 10+ years without two nickels to rub together.  Never got one red cent of child support!   Finally after years of hard work, I landed a sweet gig.  Then my twins went to college (how timely) the fafsa came back that they were each eligible for $5.5k or so in unsubsidized federal loans.  woohoo.   Had they gone two years earlier, we would have received a crapton of aid.  I married an amazing man which then disallowed even the tuition tax credit....sunofa.....    ah well, my life is a dream and I wouldn't go back to being broke and a paycheck away from hungry for free rides for both kids. 

perspective my dear.  It's a wonderful thing.





sol

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #31 on: August 03, 2015, 04:54:16 PM »
Thanks again to everyone for the replies!  Feel quite foolish for complaining.

Facepunch:  delivered.

I'm glad we could all be here for you.  Stop by anytime you need another one.

My wife was reading over my shoulder earlier today and I tried to explain this thread to her by saying "this guy is unhappy because he's working his ass off to support his family while his friends at school are getting all kinds of financial aid" and she said "yea, that's how welfare works. You don't get foodstamps anymore after you start earning money."  She's insightful as always.
« Last Edit: August 03, 2015, 08:03:49 PM by sol »

clifford4970

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #32 on: August 04, 2015, 07:30:18 PM »
Thanks again to everyone for the replies!  Feel quite foolish for complaining.

Facepunch:  delivered.

I'm glad we could all be here for you.  Stop by anytime you need another one.

My wife was reading over my shoulder earlier today and I tried to explain this thread to her by saying "this guy is unhappy because he's working his ass off to support his family while his friends at school are getting all kinds of financial aid" and she said "yea, that's how welfare works. You don't get foodstamps anymore after you start earning money."  She's insightful as always.

Tell your wife thanks for the insight.  I would agree with you stating I was unhappy with the situation.  I was more upset with the fact people can get money to be lazy.  I understand many have situations in which they cannot control, but others take advantage.  But after a few days of thinking about it and reflecting on my thought process, who cares.  That is their life and they can do as they please.  I will just keep working towards objectives and goals in my own life.

Potterquilter

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #33 on: August 04, 2015, 07:40:40 PM »
Thanks again to everyone for the replies!  Feel quite foolish for complaining.

Facepunch:  delivered.

I'm glad we could all be here for you.  Stop by anytime you need another one.

My wife was reading over my shoulder earlier today and I tried to explain this thread to her by saying "this guy is unhappy because he's working his ass off to support his family while his friends at school are getting all kinds of financial aid" and she said "yea, that's how welfare works. You don't get foodstamps anymore after you start earning money."  She's insightful as always.

Tell your wife thanks for the insight.  I would agree with you stating I was unhappy with the situation.  I was more upset with the fact people can get money to be lazy.  I understand many have situations in which they cannot control, but others take advantage.  But after a few days of thinking about it and reflecting on my thought process, who cares.  That is their life and they can do as they please.  I will just keep working towards objectives and goals in my own life.

Yes it is all about you. You are doing great and have a lot to be proud of. Hang in there. When all is said and done you will be so far ahead of your friends emotionally and monetarily.

Faraday

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Re: Who should I be mad at?
« Reply #34 on: August 04, 2015, 07:44:07 PM »
Check with your local power company's "Customer Relations Person" to see if they offer any scholarship money - my local power provider does and a fair number of people get a little bit of money (I think it's $1k or so?) every year. The set of eligible folks are only the customers, so that raises your odds a good bit, plus, I don't think they care so much that you are an adult vs. a kid - after all, YOU are the customer... :-)