Less cash gift from my parents $8000
Less cash gift from my wife's $5000
Unfortunately, the small financial help from either of our families is already calculated in. Mine is doing a bit, but hers are in fairly dire straights right now.
Some notes are that we are mostly inviting only in-town guest, so no need for hotels. The total count right now is around 80.
Oh, and we have decided that the outdoors are entirely out as an actual venue, because as much as we both love the outdoors, we know how much it can rain around here and would like to avoid last minute problems with the most wonderful day of our lives :)
We are planning on DIYing all of the paperwork (invitations and announcements). And luckily, linens/cutlery/service/cleanup is all included in the catering cost at the venue that her dad has connections with, so we don't have too many hidden fees rearing their angry little heads.
Two specific questions that could save up to $1,000 each if we went for them:
We really love the current photographer, and have agreed to splurge on him in lieu of other things because she knows him (he did her senior pictures and they really are some of the most badass photographs I have ever seen). Since wedding photos are what you get to keep and look at forever, we would really like to have his work. However, the $2550 price if for the "unlimited finished photos" package (along with some prints). He does offer a $1550 package that is basically the same deal, but you only get 100 finished, hi-res photos on the DVD that he gives you afterwards. So, for those of you with wedding photos, do you think 100 is more than enough to capture the prettiest/best portions of the day and save a quick $1000?
Now, for food. We have the option of a plated dinner (stupid expensive), a buffet dinner (also stupid expensive, but less so), and buying plates of hor d'oeuvre's at varying prices per 50 units. If we make it clear that this is all the food that will be provided ahead of time to guests, do you think it will generally accepted by the guests? I'm thinking we could just grab 3 plates each of 5-8 or so different options (meaning there would be more than 1 unit per option per person even if we expanded the guest list) and come in closer to $2000-$25000 for the food, which would be a great price cut. But, she is concerned about the guests not being happy with this, as it may be a fairly late wedding/reception that would go into or through a normal dinner time for most people.
Honestly, if it were down to just simple economics we would just elope, but her family is in the wedding business and she would at least like to have some of the traditional aspects.