My earlier post might have come off a bit dickheadish. Someone with debt is not necessarily a deal breaker, but someone with poor spending habits and is not doing anything to change them is. I don't fault anyone for their past mistakes, but I do find fault in someone still making the same mistakes and burying their head in the sand as to what the problem is.
As an example, let's take a look at younger me. I was making good money, had a nice house, a Jeep, a Jaguar, two motorcycles, and all financed. I was on top of the world, I had made it, I could "afford" it. Then the tech bubble burst, some assholes flew planes into buildings, the economy tanked, and I couldn't find a job. I sold everything I had just ahead of the creditors, and found myself living in a financed Ford Ranger. Notice the Ranger was not in the first list? Yup, traded the Jeep because the Ranger was cheaper and I "needed a reliable car" to find work. I didn't have a place to sleep, but dammit I looked good on the road! It wasn't until 3 years later when I finally drew a line in the sand and said no more, debt stops here.
I was a good, kind hearted person. I loved my friends and family. I had a good sense of humor and liked being around people. I even had plans for the future. That all sounds like a good dating profile, but I was still making HUGE horrible money decisions. I will not marry someone like I was, it will lead to disaster. It's much like dating an addict. They say they want to change and they might even mean it, but until they do, they are not ready for the commitment that marriage takes.
