Shopping with idiots in the Time of Covid

[stashja]

I live in the country in a state where all covid-19 preventative orders have just been struck down. My neighbors are being total idiots: going to bars, a giant party next door last night with at least 20 people, and at the grocery store, the staff are banned from wearing masks. Most customers have masks. Some don’t. Yesterday two adult women with a teenager and two kids in tow glared and literally breathed down my neck (I’m short) from behind me on the checkout line and a sign at the till says “faith over fear” with a Bible verse about God protecting those who deserve it. Since I am fairly certain I am undeserving of divine intervention, is there anything I can do to not get sick beyond wearing masks, clothes, hair covering and shoes that are only for shopping, not shopping more than once every 1-2 weeks (I try to make it 2 weeks but we run out of things...), going when there are less than 5 other customers in the store (i usually gauge this better than i did yesterday), handwashing, burning the packaging (there’s not much of it: I buy minimally packaged scratch staples and get veggies from my garden and root cellar), and hand wash/shower?
I need my summer salary which is overload because I am a 9 month no summer employee. If I get sick and don’t show up, I don’t get paid. That is in the contract.

[OtherJen]

That’s awful.

Is there any way that you can adjust your schedule to grocery shop on a weekday morning? The stores are much less crowded then, even with people laid off and kids out of school, and the shoppers tend to be older (read: higher-risk, and they know it) and less prone to assholism, at least where I live. If your schedule doesn’t allow a weekday shop, go as early as possible on Sunday. That used to be my preferred time when I worked a standard weekday job.

[SunnyDays]

Can you order online and pick-up at the store?  I would try to avoid going anywhere public, if that's people's attitudes.  Or shop at small stores where you can get in and out quickly, or look into CSAs and small meat sellers.  It will be more hassle and cost more, but maybe worth it.

[MilesTeg]

I live in the country in a state where all covid-19 preventative orders have just been struck down. My neighbors are being total idiots: going to bars, a giant party next door last night with at least 20 people, and at the grocery store, the staff are banned from wearing masks. Most customers have masks. Some don’t. Yesterday two adult women with a teenager and two kids in tow glared and literally breathed down my neck (I’m short) from behind me on the checkout line and a sign at the till says “faith over fear” with a Bible verse about God protecting those who deserve it. Since I am fairly certain I am undeserving of divine intervention, is there anything I can do to not get sick beyond wearing masks, clothes, hair covering and shoes that are only for shopping, not shopping more than once every 1-2 weeks (I try to make it 2 weeks but we run out of things...), going when there are less than 5 other customers in the store (i usually gauge this better than i did yesterday), handwashing, burning the packaging (there’s not much of it: I buy minimally packaged scratch staples and get veggies from my garden and root cellar), and hand wash/shower?
I need my summer salary which is overload because I am a 9 month no summer employee. If I get sick and don’t show up, I don’t get paid. That is in the contract.

Things you can try:

* order online for delivery (Kroger, whole foods, Walmart)
* order for curbside pick up (same places and more)
* find a store with a non crazy policy on masks

Barring that, wear some garlic perfume (or something even better) the next time you go out ;)

Also, I don't think burning packaging is at all useful. Throw it away, recycle it or compost it or whatever you normally would do (unless you normally keep it for some reason). Packaging is only problematic (for 3 days worst case) if you touch it and don't wash your hands after.

[maizefolk]

Can you order online and pick-up at the store?  I would try to avoid going anywhere public, if that's people's attitudes.  Or shop at small stores where you can get in and out quickly, or look into CSAs and small meat sellers.  It will be more hassle and cost more, but maybe worth it.

Another vote for doing curbside pickup or delivery. Try a couple of stores if necessary to find one that will do this, but all the grocery stores where I live now provide it. Usually curbside pickup is free and delivery costs something.

It's so much easier than going in the store, And at least at my local grocery store it's a better deal when many large package sizes (lower per unit cost) are still sold out. If they're out of something in the size I order, they tend to replace it with enough smaller ones to equal the same weight or volume, but still charge me the original price. If I went into the store and found the large size out of stock I'd be paying a higher per-unit price for the smaller containers.

[PMG]

Hey. Another rural person here, though many people are taking it more seriously here. We don’t have curbside or delivery options. Guessing it’s similar for you.  I do have one acquaintance who is driving almost an hour away just for curbside pickup.

Specifically at the checkout line, and you put your cart behind you? Use it as a barrier?

[Catbert]

In a similar situation I turned around and ask them to "back the fuck up".  Since I'm a grey haired little old lady, they were so shocked they actually did it.  Using your cart behind you as PMG suggested might help if shock isn't your style.

[Loren Ver]

Ugh :(.

You can't do anything about what people do in their own homes and what not, but you can try to shop at places that have more reasonable policies if they exist.

To protect yourself, use barriers like others suggested (cart).

Other options that might help:
If people get close, cough or make other noises.  Also, talk to yourself or on your phone.  This can cause people to give you space naturally.  Gesticulating will also cause people to give you space naturally.

Or if you are feeling passive aggressive:
Print a bible verse on a shirt or your mask about protecting others from harm, here are two, but there are lots to pick from:

Philippians 2:4
Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 

Exodus 20:13 (could be good on a mask)
You shall not murder.

[stashja]

Thanks, and please keep advising. To clarify, the closest pickup at curbside or delivery is 40 miles away in a virus hotspot city. Instacart et cetera is unavailable. We don't have a post office, either. There are no carts at this time dry goods type store.

[MrThatsDifferent]

I’d just keep wearing the mask, know what your shopping for, speak with as few as possible and get out quickly. You have to be exposed for a bit to get something. I do t think you need to go overboard.

Read this: https://www.erinbromage.com/post/the-risks-know-them-avoid-them

[RetiredAt63]

Pool noodles?  Shows the distance, and if they think you are a bit nuts they will avoid you?

We need a t shirt now that warm weather is here, with something on the back about the 6 foot distance.

Found some!
https://www.redbubble.com/shop/keep+your+distance+t-shirts

[Loretta]

That’s a tough one.  I’ve have decent luck grocery shopping around 11am, as it seems like the elderly crowd has come and gone and the essential workers aren’t off duty yet. 

Mace to the face, if anyone gets too close.  Maybe buy or borrow a walking stick/cane for visual effect. 

[expatartist]

Philippians 2:4
Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 

Exodus 20:13 (could be good on a mask)
You shall not murder.

These are brilliant suggestions.

[FLBiker]

It has definitely gotten worse here in the Tampa area.  There was a time when mask usage in the grocery store was over 50%, but when I went ~10 days ago, it was down to ~20%.  Even the workers who are all supposed to be wearing them were only ~50%.

We've been doing take out once a week and, for us, the restaurant's orientation to COVID19 has really been a factor in where we choose to go.  One of our regular places is open for indoor dining, no servers wearing masks, and we won't go there for takeout anymore.  Other places that we didn't really go to before are doing good stuff (100% no-contact curbside) and they've become our regulars.  I went to one yesterday that did this and some older lady was out of her car, no mask, talking to the employee at the curbside table.  He was clearly uncomfortable, and we were clearly supposed to stay in our cars.

Personally, I understand that some folks might not be "afraid" of the virus (I'm not, particularly) but it is really depressing to me that people are so cavalier about disregarding public health recommendations.  It has nothing to do with "bravery" or "freedom" and everything to do with behaving in a way that is best for people who can't protect themselves as well (either because of their immune system or their occupation).  Wearing a mask and socially distancing are such minor inconveniences.

Over the last 18 months or so, my family has been working on moving from Florida to Nova Scotia (as newly minted Canadian Permanent Residents).  Comparing how this is being handled in these two regions has only made us more anxious to move.  Logistically, though, the move has gotten a lot more complicated. :)

[fixie]

First off, have a paper list and a plan as to how you will execute your shopping chores.  Kindly tell the god-fearing maga shoppers/transgressors to back away from you, counter-pray to our Lord of Light Satan, shop during hours reserved for the elderly or those with co-morbidities, wipe down your cart handles, do not take a child with you shopping, use the self-checkout instead of a cashier, use your own bags (I don't care what the store policy is), wear chemistry-type goggles and nitrile gloves, tell transgressors that you have COVID.  Once you have left the store, squirt your canned goods and plastic packaging with alcohol and wipe them down, wipe down your hands outside your vehicle, remove your mask without touching the filter material(see YouTube for proper donning/doffing procedures, especially proper fitment of your mask), spray your mask with alcohol, put it on the dash in the sun for a bit, wipe your hands down again, remove your gloves and stow them in a ziploc to be disposed of, go home and change your clothes, especially leaving your shoes outside, leave cardboard boxed food in the sun or on the windowsill for a day or 2, produce and other things should be cooked and not eaten raw.  Try going to a farmer's market outside to avoid closed spaces.
Once you have done these things, you have taken every possible precaution and minimized your risk as much as is possible.  This is all stuff I do when I shop for my elder folks.  I'm still on my first little bottle of 70% isopropyl alcohol after 3 months.

Hail Satan

-fixie

[ericbonabike]

You must live in Wisconsin? 

[Laura33]

I vote for a few bouts of coughing while vaguely facing in their direction.  If you want to double down on the passive-aggressive, you can add a nice comment like "I'm so sorry, I just can't kick this cough," or "please don't worry, I'm sure it's just allergies -- I'm never sick, don't know why this cough won't go away."

As much as I like the in-your-face approaches, that is more likely to result in more engagement/proximity/emphatic airflow (i.e. raised voices), not less. 

[Lucky Penny Acres]

I have had a lot of inadvertent luck (even before Covid-19...) keeping people at a distance in stores by shopping shortly after doing farm chores - especially chicken coop cleaning or barn cleanout days.

Because you are out in the country, can you spend a bit of time around a manure pile before you shop? That scent usually gets people to stay well away from you - though you do have to live with it yourself.

[Indio]

I'm in a former C19 epicenter so most everyone here understands the importance of wearing a mask. In fact, it's much safer now that everyone has one on instead of just me wearing it. Make sure you have eye protection too.

Most of the time, I'm able to move away from people but when you're waiting in line it's difficult to maneuver away. I've asked several people who started to get within 6 ft of me to stay back for their own safety. This seems to do the trick because they make the assumption that I might be contagious.

[Imma]

I was waiting in line behind a very sweaty shirtless man the other day. That certainly worked!

Seriously though smell is the easiest option. Sweat or manure like someone else suggested. Or, if the shop doesn't offer curbside pickup, maybe they are willing to work with you if you order over X amount or if you pay a fee? Is there a teenage kid in the area or someone else who's going there anyway, who wants to deliver your groceries for a fee?

[Linea_Norway]

Here in Norway the situation is quite under control. In a small shop, I was unconsciencely standing too close to the person in front of me. He just asked me kindly to keep a meter distance and I did. No need to start coughing as a first step before asking kindly. But of course a t-shirt with a good text is a good step.

[DeedlesSci]

Sorry to hear about your situation. It is really unfortunate that people do not act in their own best interest too much of the time.

I don't know if I have much in the way of advice other than to try shopping Sunday morning, particularly before churches in your area tend to get out.

Also, if you are only shopping every two weeks, would it be worth it to drive a ways to a larger store that offers curbside pickup?

It sounds like you are doing great given the situation. But, I understand how frustrating it can still be.