Author Topic: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable  (Read 8535 times)

Zamboni

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #100 on: June 07, 2019, 06:37:58 AM »
So is old deadbeat roommate actually gone now, vacated along with all of her stuff?

marble_faun

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #101 on: June 07, 2019, 09:08:36 AM »
HURRAH!!!  I'm glad you managed to shake the deadbeat, and that the friends who had expressed concern actually did step up to help.

Good work!

Villanelle

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #102 on: June 07, 2019, 09:38:52 AM »
*Please* get something in writing from this new roommate.  Even if you just write it up yourselves and sign it, that's far better than nothing.  This situation does sound better, but if you don't at least do that, you've learned nothing!

Miss Piggy

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #103 on: June 07, 2019, 09:48:59 AM »
Awesome job, Lisa.  This sounds like a pretty happy ending to me.

Ditto...with a special emphasis on the "Awesome job, Lisa" part. That could not have been easy for you.

robartsd

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #104 on: June 07, 2019, 10:18:01 AM »
I can't imagine that the landlord wouldn't want to sign with the new roommate. In most cases they'd write up the paperwork so that they can go after either of you for all the costs regardless of what agreement you work out between yourselves. I'm glad I've never had to deal with a bad roommate situation (I was never a master tenant subletting to others though). I wouldn't count your chickens before they hatch - keep moving forward with the moving out plan until bad roommate actually is vacated. When new roommate moves in, you can share the "good news" that she took over the lease and you can afford to rent from her (works best if she's on landlord's lease; reinforced if you do leave in March as planed ans she stays) so now you don't have to move.

Cassie

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #105 on: June 07, 2019, 02:32:00 PM »
So glad it worked out. I would have found it hard to jump her car too but you need to look out for yourself. She was clearly taking advantage.

Catbert

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #106 on: June 07, 2019, 02:57:54 PM »
And she found another sucker.  Get the locks changed and the new roomate on the lease before she wears out her welcome at the new place.  I'm guessing she adept at finding (and keeping) a new sucker as often as needed.

Padonak

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #107 on: June 07, 2019, 03:00:02 PM »
If the deadbeat is gone, don't forget to change the locks. Tell the landlord company you lost your keys, want to change the locks just in case and will give them a copy of the new keys. Or just ask the landlord to change the locks.

CrustyBadger

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #108 on: June 07, 2019, 03:11:21 PM »
I was super hesitant to try the roommate thing again, but I've known her and her whole family for 17 years now, so I feel like I have a better sense of what I'm getting into.

(snip)

So it probably sounds like I'm making the same mistake all over again, but even if I get a few months of rent out of her and then it turns out the whole world is nothing but deadbeats I'm still in a better position than I am now.

Lisa, I just wanted to say that when I was in my 20s I lived in a variety of roommate and house sharing situations.  (I moved a lot only because my roommates left or the house sold, or I got a new, better job across town.) In every case it was a perfectly fine situation.  Some were better than others, but it usually worked out just fine.  If having a roommate makes sense for you financially, don't let this one incident scare you off.

BicycleB

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #109 on: June 07, 2019, 05:11:47 PM »
Congrats for taking action!

As others have said, do follow through - keep up the moving out motions, don't talk about the new roomie, do get the new roomie on the lease. I definitely like the "my other friend saved me by taking over the lease" idea about explaining the new roomie to friends afterward.

That said, your main friend group sounds like what my dad would have called a circle of patsies. If New Roomie is not as good as you hope, learn from your mistakes and upgrade your roommate search and management procedures. I have over a decade of happy roommate experience, but did read a book on "how to interview" early on, and did use explicit agreements.

PS. I think your new roomie will probably be great, but it's always smart to make sure all the bases are covered.

FrugalOG

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #110 on: June 07, 2019, 08:32:32 PM »
[quote author=reeshau link=topic=104699.msg2390178#msg2390178 date=15599065

And not to add ominous foreshadowing, but do you think this new arrangement will get back to the mutual friends of your own roomie?  You might need to do some bridge building or insulation to make sure they don't assume that these events happened in a different order, and you were dumping her *in order to* bring on someone else.
[/quote]

What?! Why would that even matter? If she was dumping her in order to bring on someone who actually pays rent, why would that be a bad thing? Logically she is struggling financially and the freeloader is not paying! And honestly why does it matter what these other people think in the first place? If they don't like how this shook out then please get new friends that are not dumb.

I'm willing to bet that the deadbeat was trying to call the bluff by giving her the aob story and pretending she was moving into her car. This whole situation is so unacceptable, the person obviously manipulative and good job to OP for getting rid of her.

Linea_Norway

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #111 on: June 08, 2019, 01:30:07 AM »
If the deadbeat is gone, don't forget to change the locks. Tell the landlord company you lost your keys, want to change the locks just in case and will give them a copy of the new keys. Or just ask the landlord to change the locks.

A cheap way can also be to change only the inside of the lock, the cylinder.

ericrugiero

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Re: Roommate situation gone wrong, now miserable
« Reply #112 on: June 10, 2019, 12:17:12 PM »
OP I'm glad things seem to be working out.  Be sure you get your new roommate on the lease.  Tell your landlord you can't afford it by yourself and will either need to break the lease and move out or bring in a new roommate.