Hi Camillus!
I'll dive in--
You have auto & life insurance, and I'll assume home insurance is in your mortgage, along with property taxes.
So that leaves some other "known knowns" and "known unknowns"
- no mention of health insurance, nor any costs for unexpected medical bills, dental, etc. Unless y'all have $0 deductible and $0 out of pocket, that seems unrealistic, especially with a kid.
- you have 2 cars, but don't have anything budgeted for maintenance, repair, and depreciation. You know you'll have to do an oil change, tire replacement, etc. You'll also have some big charges at some point (water pump fails). Yow know this will happen, just not when. AAA has some data on typical "total cost of ownership" for cars.
- same observation for your house. You will have repairs at some point. AC will blow, water heater disintegrate. Hail storm blow through, etc. You will have to do some maintenance (replacing windows, painting, etc.)
- My child was pretty active, and that came with some additional expenses:
- sports league fees
- birthday party presents. Around here, we buy up to $25/present for a birthday, and with lots of friends, that adds up.
- at a certain point, i had to pay for child's lunch at school. not a ton per month, but still measurable and budgetable.
- Clothing at $50/mn may be Ok or may not (depends on your frugality). Kids go through clothes and shoes fast
- I don't see any savings plans for new furniture, house improvements, or purchase of household goods to improve your life.
As for being over-insured, imagine if you lost your wife. While you're sorting through the emotional devastation, you'll be paying final medical and burial fees, and then have to figure out how to manage to be a single dad on half the income you used to have. $1.6M may be a bit much for the both of you (depends on who child's guardian will be, I guess), but I don't know.
That's all I can think of! It looks like you captured a ton of spending already!