Balding naive male here - this may be a stupid question but couldn't you just dye it gray? It is probably obvious (and not a big deal) to your friends, co-workers, and family members that notice these things that your current hair color is salon-assisted. If I had hair and I was graying but wanted to get rid of the unnatural color, I'd dye it one last time in a natural color so I wouldn't worry about the slow creep of gray taking forever to get rid of much different colored hair. If you are worried what people think, you could just say the truth - that you wanted something more similar to your natural hair color and you're tired of dying it!
Personally I would go with #1 and go with a lighter color to reduce the contrast. My SIL has this problem, she has gorgeous thick curly long hair, but she keeps coloring it a dark brown, but I think it grows really fast, so it seems like every time I see her she has the "skunk stripe", which drives me bonkers! At least if she went with a lighter color it would not be so noticeable.You're in AZ, so I know you're not my SIL....but that's me, thick, curly hair, albeit aburn, not dark brown....It's coloured close to what I think my natural colour was (it's been so long............).
Ironically, I have the opposite problem. In my family, going white seems to be every other generation. My great grandmother had the most gorgeous snow white hair, but my grandmother didn't have a single gray hair when she passed in her mid-60s. My mother started going gray in her 20s, and here I am early 50s with almost no gray hair. I am a darkish blonde who has been lightening up my hair a few shades for years and waiting for some white to come in so I can stop. LOL (Note that I don't know how white my mom's hair really is because she is a hairdresser and keeps it red, but the last time I noticed she had roots it was over 50% white and that was a long time ago.)
How about option 4)Have you thought about using a demi-permanent hair color while you let the gray grow out? You can buy it at beauty supply places such as Sally, and it's much cheaper than purchasing individual boxes at the drug store. It fades gradually so you just redo it as often as you need. I've found for covering gray...it doesn't last very long... :( But it's a relatively easy and inexpensive way to cover the gray as it grows out, and it doesn't bleach or damage your hair like permanent color can.
I'm mid 30s w very dark brown straight hair and lots of white wiry white hairs. I had given up dyeing but it looked terrible (the white hairs will curl and break at about 2" and stick straight up at times), so I just recently did copper highlights. It's going to cost a lot to maintain, but I can;t do the head of all dark because the even the harshest dye falls out of the white hairs. So now my hair is lighter in general and I figure it's just going to be the cost til I'm in my late 40s or whatever and can go full on white. My only fear is that the white hairs won't ever grow and i'll be stuck w short hair. I've seen some younger (under 60) ladies with Snow White hair and it's lovely. I just can't stand the contrast between the almost black and the white.
Anyway, I would caution anyone who is planning to use semi-permanent dye to help with the transition. That stuff does fade a bit but it does NOT wash out completely. So if you use it, you're likely to have lots of brassiness and not much of your natural color. Not recommended.
The new place had a couple of ideas and I went with doing low lights to blend in the new grey growth. I stuck with the low lights for about a year and now just have my own colour. I am much happier and don't care if anyone thinks I am older than I am.
Good luck with it! There are solutions other than wearing a hat for two years (unless you really like hats!).
bluebelle, just wanted to post this link for you - an example of a fairly young blogger transitioning to gray: http://www.carmellarayone.com/blog/2018/1/17/going-gray-or-shall-we-say-silver-white
And this is a blogger I've been following for a while who is currently going through the transition to gray - she is very honest about the process and her feelings: https://fulllifereflections.com/2016/11/18/gray-hair-transition-seven-months/
Anyway, I would caution anyone who is planning to use semi-permanent dye to help with the transition. That stuff does fade a bit but it does NOT wash out completely. So if you use it, you're likely to have lots of brassiness and not much of your natural color. Not recommended.
I guess this can vary, then, because I’ve been using the semi-permanent (as close as possible to my natural color) for years, and I have never gotten brassiness. I do agree that it doesn’t all disappear within the alleged “semi” period, but my experience is that it does fade over time and definitely looks more natural. Plus it’s low maintenance, which is a huge plus for me :-) — if I get lazy and wait weeks or even months, it’s not very obvious.
bluebelle, just wanted to post this link for you - an example of a fairly young blogger transitioning to gray: http://www.carmellarayone.com/blog/2018/1/17/going-gray-or-shall-we-say-silver-white
And this is a blogger I've been following for a while who is currently going through the transition to gray - she is very honest about the process and her feelings: https://fulllifereflections.com/2016/11/18/gray-hair-transition-seven-months/
Those are great links. I am now spending a lot of time going down this gray hair rabbit hole.
I occasionally think of letting it go gray, but i have very dark eyebrows and i am thinking these would look terrible in contrast to eavh other. I am in my late 30s, with no sign of my eyebrows catching up to my 100% gray hair anytime soon. I have never seen a single gray hair on my body yet that wasn't on my scalp.
I did this after I quit working. I still dye it occasionally but with semipermanent dyes only (mostly blue and purple).
Step one was to get my hair lightened and then dyed gray professionally. As it grew out, the gray/silver came in, but over the course of about 6 months, the dyed part faded into a blondish color. I would tone it and then have it trimmed up as necessary. 3 years now, completely dye free other than very occasionally the stuff that washes out after 6 washes - and I have about 3-4 inches left at the bottom of the bleached/lifted hair that isn't obvious - it ended up looking like an ombre effect everyone was paying big bucks to get.
So my first suggestion would be to get your hairdresser to do a very light at the roots to dark ombre, then just let it grow out. It is still in somewhat, and if it bothers you a bit growing out, then get some of the semi-permanent color rinses and see how that takes on the new growth.
There are semi-permanent dyes/rinses available at any beauty supply store that you can use at home just like a shampoo (no peroxides or ammonias) that will not damage your hair and could provide a transition. Fanci Full Temporary Hair Color comes to mind, but any of the lighter ash/blond tones may work. They wash out after 6 or so washes so it's not as abrupt a change and if you keep using them, it may allow your hair to grow out and get trimmed up over time until it's at a length you find acceptable and can stop coloring it completely.
Just had to share this story. Got my hair cut yesterday, and the stylist was oohing and aahing over my gray. (Salt and pepper with solid white streaks). He said this particular look is really hot right now among young people, who are paying top dollar for it (?!) I have seen twenty somethings with all-gray died hair, but apparently now the fashion is to make the gray look 'natural'. Made me smile.
How about option 4)Have you thought about using a demi-permanent hair color while you let the gray grow out? You can buy it at beauty supply places such as Sally, and it's much cheaper than purchasing individual boxes at the drug store. It fades gradually so you just redo it as often as you need. I've found for covering gray...it doesn't last very long... :( But it's a relatively easy and inexpensive way to cover the gray as it grows out, and it doesn't bleach or damage your hair like permanent color can.
This is what I was going to say. I have dark hair that started going grey in college. I have never done “real” hair dye, but at around 45 I started using the semi-permanent stuff every few months, and I leave a few noticeable grey steaks out (so I’m not dark brown one month, grey the next - there’s always noticeable grey streaks, and the background coloring just varies a bit). And the nice thing is that it just slowly fades over several weeks. And then over time I am leaving more streaks out, so each time I do it there is a little more grey. I feel like this allows me to sort of slowly go grey, but on my own terms, and in a way that makes me feel attractive.
Or do what my granny did and just dye it silver and call it good!
I have wondered about this. I've never colored my hair and wonder what I would do if I tried it once and then just let some gray come out if I didn't like it.
I'd like to say I've never colored my hair because I am gracefully accepting the aging process, but rather it's because I've had so many allergies to many things that I've been deathly afraid of it.
I go to a salon that uses an organic type of dye which is not supposed to be as bad for you, but I still can't bring myself to try it out. So in the meantime I am in my late 40s and I've never dyed my hair. I have a naturally light brown hair color and I've always had naturally blonde highlights. It seems like instead of blonde highlights these days I have a little bit of gray interspersed throughout. Some people notice it and say it actually looks good. I don't know if they're just being polite.
Oh well time keeps going on and I still haven't dyed my hair so I may be one of those women sporting gray hair proudly in a few years. I do love to see women embracing their gray and having stylish haircuts and being in great shape and looking good.
About a year and a half ago at age 45, I decided I was done coloring. I had a lot of grey around my hairline, so a dye job looked good for about three days. Infuriating!
I had cut and color consultations and then spent a lot of money. Took out as much color as possible, added light streaks, and cut off a lot of hair. I had initially thought I could just dye it all grey, but that just results in another demarcation line of hair/dye. Did it a second time and then let it grow. I haven’t looked back. My husband would prefer it blond in all honesty, but I love it. My eyebrows are dark which contrasts with pure white hair around my face. Super striking.
I get a lot of compliments. I much prefer how it looks compared to friends who dye their hair completely. I think my hair had started to look brassy and coarse, now it looks light and soft.
Anyway, 11/10 would recommend going for grey!
I like the examples in this blog post: https://thatsnotmyage.com/beauty-at-every-age/grey-hair-oh-yeah-2/
@bluebelle I have super curly hair, and I cut mine very short, then grow it out for 2 years before the next cut. A good stylist should be able to give you a short cut that will grow out if you tell them that is your intention. (For me the secret is the back has to be cut shorter than the front, as it seems to grow faster and I otherwise end up with a mullet.) But if you don't want to go short, I think dyeing in gray streaks is really the way to go.and truth be told, my hair hasn't been short in 30 years.....there are fantastic hair care products now that just didn't exsist back then....I'm sure I could tame the frizz now, where I couldn't back then. I think I just don't want short hair just yet.
I am surprised at how much is out there about this transition from dyed to natural color. I especially appreciated the pictures of the women with really short hair -- that is a look that really rocks, especially when the silver is spiked. I was trying to convince my transitioning sister to just go super short (she has shoulder length) and when she finally asked me (in exasperation), "Why are you pushing me to get a crew cut?" I realized that that I myself would really love that look, as it would work so very well in the hot summer months when I bike everywhere. So... thanks for the inspiration. Summer is just around the corner, give or take five months. !!
I am surprised at how much is out there about this transition from dyed to natural color. I especially appreciated the pictures of the women with really short hair -- that is a look that really rocks, especially when the silver is spiked. I was trying to convince my transitioning sister to just go super short (she has shoulder length) and when she finally asked me (in exasperation), "Why are you pushing me to get a crew cut?" I realized that that I myself would really love that look, as it would work so very well in the hot summer months when I bike everywhere. So... thanks for the inspiration. Summer is just around the corner, give or take five months. !!
Have also been following this topic with interest even though I do my own color, so not as $$ as the salon. I too would love a short, spiky silver cut, but I don't think my fine textured hair would support it.
Out of curiosity, what are those fantastic hair products that tame frizz?
I can't even count the number of expensive anti-frizz products I've bought over the years. Not a single one of them has ever made the slightest bit of difference. The best solution I've found is to rub a bit of coconut oil into my hair, sleep on it overnight with a towel on my pillow, then wash it out in the morning. A mixture of coconut oil, honey, and amla powder left in for 2 hours works even better. The key is to use only a tiny bit of coconut oil so that you don't have to shampoo repeatedly to get it out. If there's a new magic product out there, though, I'd like to know about it.
Out of curiosity, what are those fantastic hair products that tame frizz?I've had good luck with Marc Anthony Curl Envy and air drying
I can't even count the number of expensive anti-frizz products I've bought over the years. Not a single one of them has ever made the slightest bit of difference. The best solution I've found is to rub a bit of coconut oil into my hair, sleep on it overnight with a towel on my pillow, then wash it out in the morning. A mixture of coconut oil, honey, and amla powder left in for 2 hours works even better. The key is to use only a tiny bit of coconut oil so that you don't have to shampoo repeatedly to get it out. If there's a new magic product out there, though, I'd like to know about it.
more incentive to get to the all over grey/white....two weeks after the last colour and the white roots are quite visable (to me at least)
I'm so over colouring my hair.......I like the few streaks of grey the hair stylist put in last time.....next time, I want alot more....although the bleaching process to get the colour out of the colour treated hair was hard on my hair.
Yeah the southern grey ladies are the only ones that catch me by surprise!Oh, thanks for that chuckle! Good to know I'm not alone.
I don't wear makeup. A really formal event might call for tinted moisturizer, mascara, and lipstick. Otherwise, it's au natural for this former major cosmetics company sales rep. What is kinda wierding me out is the other gray that's appearing. Eyebrows, eyelashes, and points further um, south. What the hell?There was a whole Sex and the City episode about that. At least some parts of my body, I can shave.
Out of curiosity, what are those fantastic hair products that tame frizz?I've had good luck with Marc Anthony Curl Envy and air drying
I can't even count the number of expensive anti-frizz products I've bought over the years. Not a single one of them has ever made the slightest bit of difference. The best solution I've found is to rub a bit of coconut oil into my hair, sleep on it overnight with a towel on my pillow, then wash it out in the morning. A mixture of coconut oil, honey, and amla powder left in for 2 hours works even better. The key is to use only a tiny bit of coconut oil so that you don't have to shampoo repeatedly to get it out. If there's a new magic product out there, though, I'd like to know about it.
I transitioned to grey three years ago aged 42. At the time I was a consultant rather than an employee. I have naturally mousy hair which was dyed blonde and cut short which I i noticed was looking strawlike and was making my relatively pale skin look chalky.
It kind of happened by neglect in that i simply did not get a hair cut for about 2 years from the end of 2014. The dyed ends grew long and the mousy bit grew very long and increasingly grey. For job interviews I wore it up and used a brown rinse (which stained the hair but mostly washed out).
Now it is very healthy and cut in a bob and increasingly silver. I love it and I think I timed it well as any later I would have quite a grey stripe to grow out. I notice naturally silver hair on others with appreciation.
There is literally nothing about dyeing my hair that I miss. The way it looks (worse), the expense (grey is THE Mustachian option: queue here for your facepunches if you wish to argue otherwise), the time, the lack of authenticity, the condition of the hair itself, the stained scalp ...
Out of curiosity, what are those fantastic hair products that tame frizz?
I can't even count the number of expensive anti-frizz products I've bought over the years. Not a single one of them has ever made the slightest bit of difference. The best solution I've found is to rub a bit of coconut oil into my hair, sleep on it overnight with a towel on my pillow, then wash it out in the morning. A mixture of coconut oil, honey, and amla powder left in for 2 hours works even better. The key is to use only a tiny bit of coconut oil so that you don't have to shampoo repeatedly to get it out. If there's a new magic product out there, though, I'd like to know about it.
Oh man, I feel so embarrassed, because I think I am the only one, but I *PLUCK* every single grey hair out! I'm 40 now and remember noticing a grey hair or two before 30 and plucked it out right away, and I guess I just never quit doing that! Every once in a while I miss one and it gets two or three inches long, but I mostly find them before 1 inch in length as I spend about 5-10 minutes hunting every week or two.
Reading this thread has made me realize how much worse I probably made it for myself for the point at which my hairdresser assures me is coming, when I just won't be able to keep up anymore. I'm nowhere near that now, but I realize I should never have plucked - having them come in gradually over time would have been much better! Now, if I stop, I'll have many strands growing out at once together and suddenly instead. That will look weird.
Wow, not only did I not realize I was so unusual in plucking grey hairs out for the a decade+ but I definitely didn't realize exactly why I might regret it.
I've got to give some serious consideration to stopping now, ASAP. OTOH, I have a touch of the trichotillomania, I think, and I just really love plucking things. So satisfying! So I'll miss it in more ways than one.
What about ombré dying? I decided not to dye my hair anymore in my early 20’s. Now approaching mid 30’s, I have a frame of silver strands around my face....the wiry kind. My hair is dark and curly.
Anyway, what made me decide not to dye my hair was seeing an older woman with long dreadlocks when I was in college. The colors transitioning from dark brown at the bottom, , to medium brown, reddish/light brown, grey-brown, grey, white...was so beautiful. It looked like aged wood. I believe it was all her natural hair color (dreads often holds hair for decades past, since the strands don’t fall out). It was like witnessing her history...her brown 20’s, her sun-faded 30’s, greying 40’s etc. But I imagine you could replicate it with a talented colorist. Then you don’t have to color anymore. You’d be on-trend, and the grey/white coming in at the roots will just be another layer of the “rainbow”.
My hubby just started covering his grey with that hair care for men shampoo for greys with conditioner in it. He's a really dark brown and his greys are white. He actually only does about 75% of his greys and I swear he has better hair looks than I ever get at the hair salon. He uses it once or twice a week now for maintenance and achieves the highlighted look. He was getting too gray and wants to keep a youthful appearance at work but still have some grey so it doesn't look too fake.
My hubby just started covering his grey with that hair care for men shampoo for greys with conditioner in it. He's a really dark brown and his greys are white. He actually only does about 75% of his greys and I swear he has better hair looks than I ever get at the hair salon. He uses it once or twice a week now for maintenance and achieves the highlighted look. He was getting too gray and wants to keep a youthful appearance at work but still have some grey so it doesn't look too fake.
Great post. I bought this shampoo on amazon after reading it (Just For Men Control GX Grey Reducing Shampoo).
I've had a little bit of gray hair since mid 20s, more in my 30s. I have been using a little bit of this shampoo every day for about a month. I have a lot less gray hair now, but it doesn't get rid of it completely which is not what i want anyway.
If you buy the shampoo, use your palms, not fingers, to apply it, because it may stain your nails over time if you use the fingers. I used palms from the beginning as per instructions.
Edit: Check out reviews on Amazon before buying. Some reviews have honest before and after pictures so you know what to expect. Some reviews also claim that the shampoo stains shower curtains, pillows, shower walls etc. I see some dark spots on my shower curtain, but it's like less than 2 bucks, so i can change it every month. Pillows? Didn't notice anything yet, I use the shampoo in the morning, so maybe dry hair doesnt color it. Shower walls? I haven't noticed yet. I don't own the place anyway so don't care.
I don't have anything else to add right now except I love your signature @couponvan :) @Bracken_Joy always seems to have interesting things to say.
Oh man, I feel so embarrassed, because I think I am the only one, but I *PLUCK* every single grey hair out! I'm 40 now and remember noticing a grey hair or two before 30 and plucked it out right away, and I guess I just never quit doing that! Every once in a while I miss one and it gets two or three inches long, but I mostly find them before 1 inch in length as I spend about 5-10 minutes hunting every week or two.
Reading this thread has made me realize how much worse I probably made it for myself for the point at which my hairdresser assures me is coming, when I just won't be able to keep up anymore. I'm nowhere near that now, but I realize I should never have plucked - having them come in gradually over time would have been much better! Now, if I stop, I'll have many strands growing out at once together and suddenly instead. That will look weird.
Wow, not only did I not realize I was so unusual in plucking grey hairs out for the a decade+ but I definitely didn't realize exactly why I might regret it.
I've got to give some serious consideration to stopping now, ASAP. OTOH, I have a touch of the trichotillomania, I think, and I just really love plucking things. So satisfying! So I'll miss it in more ways than one.
Why don't you from now on pluck fewer and fewer hairs. So you will have a gradual introduction of grey hairs and you can pluck. On the other hand, it is much better to quit an annoying habit all the same.
I don't have anything else to add right now except I love your signature @couponvan :) @Bracken_Joy always seems to have interesting things to say.
Awww thank you for tagging me =) That was a happy thing to wake up to.
I'm still tickled when I notice Coup's signature!
Why are we making ourselves invisible, as experienced, knowledgeable women of a certain age? Why are we pretending to be younger?
Oh man, I feel so embarrassed, because I think I am the only one, but I *PLUCK* every single grey hair out!
Oh man, I feel so embarrassed, because I think I am the only one, but I *PLUCK* every single grey hair out!
I used to do that. It got to be just too much, and I stopped. It wasn't that bad. It's true that occasionally there would be this weird short gray hair, and if it looked too weird I would still pluck it out. Most of the hairs grow in unobtrusively, so eventually a prominent short hair doesn't look that odd and you can let it grow.
Why wouldn't it do the same for women?
more incentive to get to the all over grey/white....two weeks after the last colour and the white roots are quite visable (to me at least)oh my freaking god....is bleaching hard on your hair....7 weeks later, I had alot more grey streaks put in....but the bleaching process to stip out all the colour took a long time and my hair is super brittle now. (how do people who regularily bleach their hair blond have any hair left on their head?)....
I'm so over colouring my hair.......I like the few streaks of grey the hair stylist put in last time.....next time, I want alot more....although the bleaching process to get the colour out of the colour treated hair was hard on my hair.
more incentive to get to the all over grey/white....two weeks after the last colour and the white roots are quite visable (to me at least)oh my freaking god....is bleaching hard on your hair....7 weeks later, I had alot more grey streaks put in....but the bleaching process to stip out all the colour took a long time and my hair is super brittle now. (how do people who regularily bleach their hair blond have any hair left on their head?)....
I'm so over colouring my hair.......I like the few streaks of grey the hair stylist put in last time.....next time, I want alot more....although the bleaching process to get the colour out of the colour treated hair was hard on my hair.
anyway, I now have more grey (temporary tint over the yellowish bleached hair) than red....and have decided that I'm just going to let it grow out....skunk strip and all....this is way to hard on my hair, way too time consuming (5+ hours at the hair salon)......
for anyone contemplating starting to colour their hair - DON'T.
for anyone contemplating starting to colour their hair - DON'T.
sorry to hear about your thinning hair, FWIW, I have super thick hair (or at least I did before I had the hairdresser bleach alot of streaks in), the snowy white scalp of grow out was what made me decide to stop colouring in the first place....snow white hair and a very white/pink scalp made it look like I was balding.more incentive to get to the all over grey/white....two weeks after the last colour and the white roots are quite visable (to me at least)oh my freaking god....is bleaching hard on your hair....7 weeks later, I had alot more grey streaks put in....but the bleaching process to stip out all the colour took a long time and my hair is super brittle now. (how do people who regularily bleach their hair blond have any hair left on their head?)....
I'm so over colouring my hair.......I like the few streaks of grey the hair stylist put in last time.....next time, I want alot more....although the bleaching process to get the colour out of the colour treated hair was hard on my hair.
anyway, I now have more grey (temporary tint over the yellowish bleached hair) than red....and have decided that I'm just going to let it grow out....skunk strip and all....this is way to hard on my hair, way too time consuming (5+ hours at the hair salon)......
for anyone contemplating starting to colour their hair - DON'T.
Ha- I needed to read the bolded today.
Even though I love my silver streaks I don't like the "pepper" part of my hair and back when I colored I went for an ashy light brown/dark blonde.
Health issues (and I suspect early greying) have made my thin hair just a bit thinner. And the dark hair (70%) against my snow white scalp make the thinner spots noticeable in a way they never were when my hair was dyed a lighter color.
I have been thinking about coloring again until I have more gray (I'm about 30%).
But I worked so hard to grow it out! I probably shouldn't color it again :)
for anyone contemplating starting to colour their hair - DON'T.
for anyone contemplating starting to colour their hair - DON'T.
Thank you for starting this thread, bluebelle, it has been very informative for me. I'm 38 with black hair and dreading the day I start to grey, with all the implications that I'm old (and will look it). I'm a bit more at peace with the idea now that I see there are lower-maintenance alternatives like that Black Malva conditioner. I'm going to try hard to avoid dyeing and put that money and energy into maintaining youthful health and attitude.
A friend I hadn't seen in a while commented on my dispersed naturally highlighted grays and said she loved my hair color. She then mentioned how she had been thinking of stopping the coloring of her hair, as she was tired of all of the chemicals. Perhaps I have a convert...
I also went to my high school reunion and found an old classmate sporting a very healthy shoulder length gray hairdo. She was originally blond. I kept telling her how awesome she looked and she was an inspiration.
has anyone used any of the 'purple' shampoos and conditioners for blonde and grey hair, to tone down 'brassiness' (which I assume means ugly yellow)?
2.5 weeks after the major bleach/streak, the semi-perm grey is fully washed out, and now I have yellowish streaks to go with the damaged hair. I've order Joico purple colour balancer shampoo, it's supposed to tone down the yellow and give it a silver sheen....what the hell, it's work a try.
I'll let all y'all know how it goes.
I'll get there, but this transition is more work than colouring my hair every 5-6 weeks.........sigh
has anyone used any of the 'purple' shampoos and conditioners for blonde and grey hair, to tone down 'brassiness' (which I assume means ugly yellow)?
2.5 weeks after the major bleach/streak, the semi-perm grey is fully washed out, and now I have yellowish streaks to go with the damaged hair. I've order Joico purple colour balancer shampoo, it's supposed to tone down the yellow and give it a silver sheen....what the hell, it's work a try.
I'll let all y'all know how it goes.
I'll get there, but this transition is more work than colouring my hair every 5-6 weeks.........sigh
I've used the purple ones - they do work a little. Ugly yellow/orange is the "brassiness" of which you speak. I prefer the John Frieda gloss toners to the shampoo. Sadly Walgreens just stopped carrying the toners - I wish I'd known as I would have bought a bunch as I grow out my gray and stop highlighting my hair.
I'm 38 and decided to ditch the dye about 4 months ago. Last month I had my stylist put in a few ashy blonde highlights along my part to break up the skunk stripe. It seems to be a little less noticeable. I have been coloring my hair since I was 16, so I have no idea what my actual hair color is now. Hoping to stay strong in this journey.
Bluebell -- get yourself some Olaplex conditioner -- you will probably have to order it online and it is not cheap. However, it does an amazing job to repair damaged, bleached hair. I used it when I bleached out the red in my hair to a blond to start my grow-out process. It really does work, and even though I have fairly long hair, I was able to get 4 treatments from one $28 bottle. You put it on wet hair and leave it for a long time -- at least 30 minutes, but overnight, or all day while you're at home is better. Then you wash it out.]
The other thing I find funny, the 1/4 to 1/2" of white skunk line always seemed to appear so quickly, but now that I'm at 13+ weeks of root grow out, it doesn't seem to be growing out as fast......
I am gray more on one side and than the other. This is mildly annoying to me. Also, my hair seems to be growing more slowly now. Or the gray is breaking off and I never noticed it when it was colored the same as my hair.
and most importantly, it's helped me give fewer fucks about what other people think. I've spent too much time in my life worrying about what other people think. My white roots are a daily reminder that the person in the mirror has the most important opinion about my life. (I'm a people pleaser, so I need all the help I can get in putting my own oxygen mask on first)
3) people aren't very observant - folks are putting me 10-15 years older than I am, whereas folks put me 10-15 years younger than I am when I coloured my hair - pretty sure that my face hasn't aged 20-30 years in the last 6 months!
1) the first 1/2" of white roots seems to grow alot faster than 5 months of growth
2) people have alot of opinions of what I should do
I use Joico purple shampoo.....they have a Joico Blue that might do what you want. The purple does give a slight lavender shade to my hair (why I only use it every 7-10 days). And you're right, it will do nothing to your brown hair, just the silver/white hair.
I loved it (and I'd particularly like one that does the same thing with blue), but have so far been unsuccessful googling for such a thing. I've long thought that if I can get a grey/white streak I'll dye it purple or blue, but so far all the grey/whites are evenly mixed in with my fairly dark brown hair. If I can use shampoo or conditioner to get just the grey to be an interesting color, (and I doubt it'd affect the brown much) I'd spring for it!
Ironically, I have the opposite problem. In my family, going white seems to be every other generation. My great grandmother had the most gorgeous snow white hair, but my grandmother didn't have a single gray hair when she passed in her mid-60s. My mother started going gray in her 20s, and here I am early 50s with almost no gray hair. I am a darkish blonde who has been lightening up my hair a few shades for years and waiting for some white to come in so I can stop. LOL (Note that I don't know how white my mom's hair really is because she is a hairdresser and keeps it red, but the last time I noticed she had roots it was over 50% white and that was a long time ago.)
Awesome! Thanks for the reference -- I'll go check it out.
I loved it (and I'd particularly like one that does the same thing with blue), but have so far been unsuccessful googling for such a thing. I've long thought that if I can get a grey/white streak I'll dye it purple or blue, but so far all the grey/whites are evenly mixed in with my fairly dark brown hair. If I can use shampoo or conditioner to get just the grey to be an interesting color, (and I doubt it'd affect the brown much) I'd spring for it!
I use Joico purple shampoo.....they have a Joico Blue that might do what you want. The purple does give a slight lavender shade to my hair (why I only use it every 7-10 days). And you're right, it will do nothing to your brown hair, just the silver/white hair.
8 month in now and I figure I've saved at least $700 for the year. I'm planning to chop my hair in a few months to get it to be (mostly) one color. My two friends right now are the purple shampoo and hot pink lipstick.
8 month in now and I figure I've saved at least $700 for the year. I'm planning to chop my hair in a few months to get it to be (mostly) one color. My two friends right now are the purple shampoo and hot pink lipstick.Yeah you! I'm at about 6.5 months of growth now....I like the colour, and I do like the hue after a wash with purple shampoo. I actually got stopped last week by a stranger to tell me how much they liked my colour - was it natural or did I dye it this way? (who would dye 4-5 inches white and leave the rest? But a compliment is a compliment).
For anyone still contemplating letting the grey grow out - GO FOR IT. It's very freeing, not worrying about whether the root grow out is showing....when I coloured my hair, I knew roots were showing within 7-10 days of a colour....now, I don't worry about it....as would be appropriate on this forum, I have no fucks to give.
Thought I'd chime in as a natural blonde(ish). Started off with super light hair, and it gradually developed into a dark blonde. Added highlights in my 20s, and then stopped coloring my hair around 30. I'm 42, and unfortunately, the way the gray is growing in. . . is pretty terrible. Because the color contrast is so close, it actually looks kind of like awful/mousy highlights. I also pull my hair back a lot for working out, and it's quite noticeable. It is so ashy & really washes me out. (I'm quite fair). Given how close the colors are, I'm thinking of just using a wash in rinse. Has anyone else been in a similar position? I know, this doesn't belong in the "going grey gracefully" thread. :-)
Added bonus: I have no need for conditioner or styling products any more. I can use straight shampoo and maybe a touch of hairspray for the flyaways. My hair is super shiny and soft, and it is comb-able right after a shower. It is scary how pretty and manageable it is now. I guess once you stop putting crap in your hair that damages it, you don't need to buy 6 billion other products trying to fix it or make it possible to work with it...
I was about to color my gray hair yesterday, when I spotted this thread. (Since I was going a little ahead of schedule, I put it off a day.) I've been toying with the idea of growing the gray out due to current trends, but I'm now of an age where I can't pull off the young face, gray hair look. It's going to age me a lot, and I need to get back into the workforce, so it's not going to happen now. I'd love to try the purple wash, but have been warned that the gray doesn't really take it. Nice to read that it is working for some here. Again, I can't do the purple thing now, as I really, really need to get my career going again. It's already hard enough trying to get back in in my 40's, without anything else possibly working against me.
I do love the look on one of the bloggers shared here, though. It is also comforting to learn of all the others that have gone gray as early as I have. It's been frustrating to me to be young, but have really old looking hair. It's a bit less frustrating now that my age has caught up to my hair somewhat. If I had to guess, I'd say I'm 60% gray at the crown and sides, very little gray lower down on my head.
So for now, I'm continuing the box hair color that I love (Swartzkoff Keritin in delicate praline, which is close to my pre-gray color). It does give my fine hair better texture, so there's a silver lining I guess. I only dye the regrowth per my hairdresser's suggestion, so that really helps with drying effects. My colored gray pops out a bit as sparkly highlights as it fades a bit. My hairdresser does highlights on my hair a few times a year, too. I pay half or less than many of you for this, however. (LCOLA & personal acquaintance) I imagine that when I go to au naturale sometime in the future, I'll opt for the sporadic highlights/lowlights route.
I was about to color my gray hair yesterday, when I spotted this thread. (Since I was going a little ahead of schedule, I put it off a day.) I've been toying with the idea of growing the gray out due to current trends, but I'm now of an age where I can't pull off the young face, gray hair look. It's going to age me a lot, and I need to get back into the workforce, so it's not going to happen now. I'd love to try the purple wash, but have been warned that the gray doesn't really take it. Nice to read that it is working for some here. Again, I can't do the purple thing now, as I really, really need to get my career going again. It's already hard enough trying to get back in in my 40's, without anything else possibly working against me.
I do love the look on one of the bloggers shared here, though. It is also comforting to learn of all the others that have gone gray as early as I have. It's been frustrating to me to be young, but have really old looking hair. It's a bit less frustrating now that my age has caught up to my hair somewhat. If I had to guess, I'd say I'm 60% gray at the crown and sides, very little gray lower down on my head.
So for now, I'm continuing the box hair color that I love (Swartzkoff Keritin in delicate praline, which is close to my pre-gray color). It does give my fine hair better texture, so there's a silver lining I guess. I only dye the regrowth per my hairdresser's suggestion, so that really helps with drying effects. My colored gray pops out a bit as sparkly highlights as it fades a bit. My hairdresser does highlights on my hair a few times a year, too. I pay half or less than many of you for this, however. (LCOLA & personal acquaintance) I imagine that when I go to au naturale sometime in the future, I'll opt for the sporadic highlights/lowlights route.
I understand why you continue to paint for the moment. It is unfortunate that hair colour on a working place matters in our society, especially for women.
Ahhh, this is awesome! Congrats and thanks for the update! I’m new, but I read discovered and read through the thread yesterday. ♥️
I'm coming up on the one year anniversary of ditching the dye. I'm about half and half now natural vs colored for my shoulder length hair. Last weekend I had bangs cut and it was best decision ever. While not for everyone, I found that they sharpened up my look and made my color at least look symmetrical.Isn't the white 'halo' effect around your face awesome? I love mine....I'm at the 10 month mark now, seeing more white on the floor with every hair cut (meaning that the shorter layers are fully grown out now!)
My hair is feeling so healthy without chemicals! For anyone thinking about going au naturale, go for it. You can always dye your hair again if you don't like it. You might actually be surprised and like what you see. :)
My hair is feeling so healthy without chemicals! For anyone thinking about going au naturale, go for it. You can always dye your hair again if you don't like it. You might actually be surprised and like what you see. :)
Just a quick note to say that as of today I'm officially 12 months free of dye!I was officially 12 months dye free Feb 19.....I have layered hair as well, the shorter layers are all white, the longer layers have 2-3" of colour left. I guess that's a 'style' because I get stopped occaisionally and asked where I had my hair 'done', they love the colour.
No regrets. My hair is much thicker now. I still have a little bit of the dye left on the bottom mostly near the front where the hair is longest from the very top of my head, but hoping with another trim or two, it will be cut out too. My hair is currently layered and about chin length and I'd like to grow it longer to my shoulders at least the way I had it before this journey.
Congratulations on 12 months! I am fully salt n pepper at 41. My hair went from wavy to downright curly in recent years. With the new texture I must use conditioner whereas in previous years I could suffice with shampoo only. When I decide to try the purple tinting shampoo and conditioner, I’ll probably go with the Jhirmack brand. I use Refectocil to dye my eyebrows, as I’m not emotionally ready for sparkly salty brow hairs yet.Funny, I have one grey lower eyelash. It cracks me up, because of course it grows at a different angle from the rest. I can't be bothered with mascara, so it is what it is.
I'm pretty much all silver now, but the thing that freaks me out isbe happy it's only occaisional ones! :-)Spoiler: show
Well, less than 3 weeks until my wedding and I've stuck with the no plucking my grays for well over 6 months now. I have a few quite visible on or around my part and they are sort of kinky - even when I blow dry/flat iron they do not un-kink. I don't think I mind the color as much as that funky kink!
Mine will be a small wedding, but I have one friend in particular that is coming and I bet will notice. I doubt she'll say anything over the weekend, but we'll see. I would be happy to have the chance to say I'm going natural to make my little contribution to normalizing this!
This whole thread is fascinating. I never really understood how much identity is tied up avoiding gray, how much it costs both in money and mental bandwidth to keep up with the coloring, and how hard it can be to go back to natural. It's just a further reminder that inflexible beauty standards are so oppressive. Particularly those that favor youth. We're all getting older all the time! I personally aspire to live to be very old! So why beat ourselves up trying to look like we're younger than we are?
I'm a woman in my mid thirties and dark brown, with little bits of gray coming in around my temples, so I can't say I've really felt the pressure to dye as I would if I had gone gray younger. But I did cut my hair really, really short which is good for exercising that "don't give a fuck" muscle. And this thread has convinced me that I will NEVER color my hair. Not worth it!
Kudos to everyone who has opted to move closer to natural and liberate themselves from the tyranny of color.
This whole thread is fascinating. I never really understood how much identity is tied up avoiding gray, how much it costs both in money and mental bandwidth to keep up with the coloring, and how hard it can be to go back to natural. It's just a further reminder that inflexible beauty standards are so oppressive. Particularly those that favor youth. We're all getting older all the time! I personally aspire to live to be very old! So why beat ourselves up trying to look like we're younger than we are?
I'm a woman in my mid thirties and dark brown, with little bits of gray coming in around my temples, so I can't say I've really felt the pressure to dye as I would if I had gone gray younger. But I did cut my hair really, really short which is good for exercising that "don't give a fuck" muscle. And this thread has convinced me that I will NEVER color my hair. Not worth it!
Kudos to everyone who has opted to move closer to natural and liberate themselves from the tyranny of color.
I've been weighing on and off about dying for the last 5 years or so,
I've been weighing on and off about dying for the last 5 years or so,
I'm glad you decided on not dying. Not dyeing and living with the grey is a much better idea. ;-)
I've been weighing on and off about dying for the last 5 years or so,
I'm glad you decided on not dying. Not dyeing and living with the grey is a much better idea. ;-)
Note to self - do not multi-task while posting in order to prevent dumb spelling mistakes that very smart forum members will ALWAYS pick up on.
It's not that it makes me feel old, it's more like I no longer have my favorite outfit to wear.
Hang in there! It is so liberating to be free of the dyeing/regrowth cycle, and just enjoying healthy hair. Not to mention saving on products and hairdressers.
For me it has actually helped me accept getting older. I like feeling fit and active and would rather feel happy about that than worried about my appearance.
Having said that, not working makes it easier.
I still don't have a lot of gray yet (one noticeable temple streak) but what bums me out is I have lost my red highlights. I am straight medium brown now. I miss the red!when I was much younger, and didn't have alot of grey, I used henna, that gave me lovely red highlights where the grey had been
I still don't have a lot of gray yet (one noticeable temple streak) but what bums me out is I have lost my red highlights. I am straight medium brown now. I miss the red!when I was much younger, and didn't have alot of grey, I used henna, that gave me lovely red highlights where the grey had been
If only I would end up with a beautiful full head of silver grey... Instead, I have the same head of fine, straight, dirty dishwater colored hair with a sprinkle of grey and a few grey streaks instead of the rich auburn I enjoyed and got complimented on for years.I had that color of hair. I would just spray a bit of Sun In to brighten it, cut it once a year, and trim my bangs myself. Almost free hair maintenance. I thought other women who paid for hair color were wasting their money.
It's not that it makes me feel old, it's more like I no longer have my favorite outfit to wear. I have always hated my natural color, and that's not changing with the addition of a little grey.
I was thinking of you fine folks earlier this month. We went on a short trip to Scotland in the middle of August. I have to say that it must be a cultural thing in the U.S. that women of most ages feel the need to cover up the natural aging/greying process. I was surprised at the number of women of all ages just letting nature speak for it's self there. It was nice to be among the natural colored folks for a while. I fit right in now that I'm 18 months in and just the tinest of color is left at the ends on some layers. At a concert we went to, a woman who I had just met said she loved the color of my hair which was very nice to hear. Anyway, if you live in a country other that the U.S. it may be that your society is more welcoming/accepting than ours! Something to celebrate.
At my last haircut, my hairdresser asked me if I had considered dying my hair. I just laughed and said I had dyed it from 15-35 and I was done. Sorry, not prepared to sign up for another piece of maintenance work.
At my last haircut, my hairdresser asked me if I had considered dying my hair. I just laughed and said I had dyed it from 15-35 and I was done. Sorry, not prepared to sign up for another piece of maintenance work.
So glad you said no!
I'm now almost 5 months out from my last hair dye, and my hair is in better condition than it has been in YEARS. Plus the natural gray looks so much better than the dyed hair. I can't believe how much time I spent not just in dye sessions but daily, to manage my badly damaged hair. And the products I was buying to try to control frizz, add shine, etc. I only wish I quit the hair dye years ago.
This haircut I *did* have a shock when I looked in the mirror after the wash and ALLLLLL my silvers were standing up and crazy while the rest of my hair was wet and dark with water! Luckily, after the cut the silvers all blended back in and it was a lot less of a heart attack. Phew.At my last haircut, my hairdresser asked me if I had considered dying my hair. I just laughed and said I had dyed it from 15-35 and I was done. Sorry, not prepared to sign up for another piece of maintenance work.
So glad you said no!
I'm now almost 5 months out from my last hair dye, and my hair is in better condition than it has been in YEARS. Plus the natural gray looks so much better than the dyed hair. I can't believe how much time I spent not just in dye sessions but daily, to manage my badly damaged hair. And the products I was buying to try to control frizz, add shine, etc. I only wish I quit the hair dye years ago.
Who is grateful now they went gray before all the hair salons are closed with coronavirus? For those who are now having to consider going gray I hope this thread gives you some good suggestions and tips.Actually, I was thinking it was a good time for anyone on the fence about it.....social distancing is going to go on for a while.....
Who is grateful now they went gray before all the hair salons are closed with coronavirus? For those who are now having to consider going gray I hope this thread gives you some good suggestions and tips.