How do I finally find QUIET

[hooplady]

Throughout my life I've constantly searched for a QUIET place to live. Growing up it was in a typical suburban house that was occasionally quiet, but often with barking dogs on either side. As I moved into adulthood it was various apartments with tenants who liked to play loud music or otherwise disturb my peace. In the last few decades I've dealt with kids, dogs, loud music, the gamut. My current home is in an urban area that has gone through many phases of renewal; it went from homeless people hollering at 2am, to continuous construction noise, to young folks moving in and partying at all hours. Last night was yet another domestic dispute in the street at 4am, I'm really sick of it all.

I've looked into buying in a more rural area, but many homes are set on long narrow lots, meaning that the house itself is right next to another home.

So my question is, how do I find my peace? Is the solution a soundproof condo (are there such things)?  A house in the middle of nowhere? Or do I need to address this within my own personal sphere, with something like earplugs, acoustic panels or noise-canceling technology? And if I do seek out another home, what are the questions I need to ask?

Thanks in advance for whatever wisdom is offered.

[lutorm]

A less urban place would sure help, but another observation I have made when comparing and contrasting the noise issue here in Hawaii vs in Sweden where I grew up is that, while it may intrinsically be marginally more noisy here in Hawaii (SO many leaf blowers, lawn mowers, and giant trucks), it sure appears even more noisy because you always have all windows open here, houses have no insulation, and our house even has single walls. Houses in Sweden are solid with 30-40cm of insulation and triple pane windows, and this makes a tremendous difference for how much external noise makes it inside the house. So maybe you should move to somewhere it's really cold. ;-)

[deborah]

I was going to suggest that you invest in a lot of insulation.

[Log]

I recommend earplugs.

The quietest urban option is probably to get further above the street noise in a highrise. Higher end buildings will generally have better sound insulation between units.

[Freedomin5]

High end single family home on a large lot, far away from any neighbors. My mom lives in a 55+ neighborhood in a detached house, backing onto a golf course. They’re mostly elderly couples who have been married for decades, or divorced/widowed. Her neighbors are snowbirds who are only there six months of the year. Kids are all grown up. It’s really quiet there. Except for the birds chirping. But at least there are no human-made noises.

[GilesMM]

IN the country you will hear chainsaws, dogs barking, fireworks, tannerite explosions, gunfire, tractors, hot rodders, motorcycles, braying donkeys, Great Horned Owls, and more.  Ask me how I know.


One of our quieter apartments was in a 5-story building in Brazil. We were in the middle of Rio on a beach fronted by a busy street. However, the building was concrete with great windows. There was a low background level of traffic noise in the living room. But the bedrooms were in the back with windows to enclosed courtyards and completely quiet except when the unpopular president addressed the nation on tv and everyone beat on pots and pans.


I think you have to find the right place.  In some areas you will find HOA restrictions on noise after dark, which can help.

[Paper Chaser]

Throughout my life I've constantly searched for a QUIET place to live. Growing up it was in a typical suburban house that was occasionally quiet, but often with barking dogs on either side. As I moved into adulthood it was various apartments with tenants who liked to play loud music or otherwise disturb my peace. In the last few decades I've dealt with kids, dogs, loud music, the gamut. My current home is in an urban area that has gone through many phases of renewal; it went from homeless people hollering at 2am, to continuous construction noise, to young folks moving in and partying at all hours. Last night was yet another domestic dispute in the street at 4am, I'm really sick of it all.

All of these noise issues are directly related to being in close proximity to other people. No place near people will even be totally quiet. As noted, rural living can come with other noises also coming from people. When I lived in a rural area there were tractors, gunshots, etc. But they were never directly outside of my front door, and only occurred during daylight hours.

If you don't want to move further from the conveniences of society, then you'll have to look inward at what you can do to control and improve your own situation (Insulation, sound proofing, ear plugs, etc).

[EchoStache]

Short of moving, windows are usually the largest source of sound.  Invest in some *really* good sound proof/sound isolating windows and it may make a substantially worthwhile improvement for you.  A YouTube search will provide some pretty good examples of how much quieter good windows make things.  The walls of a typical house with some type of siding, wood, insulation, and inner layer such as drywall, block a lot of noise.  Windows, not so much.

In my limited research, it seems that triple pane windows are good, and laminate glass is even better.

Loop earplugs might be worth a try for some noise reduction without wearing headphones, and they will still allow you to have conversation.  They are designed to lower noise levels but not block them, and may be comfortable enough to wear a lot.

Bose QC II noise cancelling headphones will block the most noise but family members will have to make hand gestures for you to know they are trying to talk to you.

Some combination of the above three are likely to make your life drastically quieter.

[Metalcat]

Reading this a few questions come to mind that you do not need to answer.

-How is your general stress level?
-Are you neurodivergent?
-Do you have a neurological condition that makes you ultra sensitive to sound?

If the fixation on quiet is driven by any of the above, you may never find peace unless you address those issues and get yourself the right tools and supports.

I live with a permanent migraine, so I can be quite sound sentsitive.

I currently live on a major intersection of a major city, but my apartment is so soundproofed that I can only vaguely hear the violently screaming baby in the bedroom right above me, but only at night, and only ever so faintly. DH can't hear it at all.

This is an early 70s construction highrise building with dense concrete walls, and I'm 20 stories up. If I open windows, I hear a lot of ambient city and car noise, but this high up it's like white noise. With the windows closed, all I hear are my animals and air purifiers.

My other house is out in a very remote area of Newfoundland. The ambient level of noise there is much lower than the city and is basically just the ocean, which is much nicer white noise, but I'm far enough from the water that I can only hear it if I'm not doing anything. It's astonishingly quiet...unless someone is around and makes noise, because, well, humans.

So it will depend on your particular type of noise sensitivity. Mine is most triggered by comparative noise. When I'm more stressed, I'm better with low ambient noise and no notable sounds than I am with silence and the occasional chain saw or barking dog.

For high stress times, I'm better off in the low city hum in my concrete sky box. If I'm low stress, I'm better off in the exquisite quiet with occasional human noises.

It's important to really understand what elements of sound bother you and then mitigate that.

[snic]

If the issue is mostly noise at night (e.g., 4 am domestic disputes), consider Bose Sleepbuds. They fit comfortably in your ears - even if you sleep on your side - and play a range of soothing noises. "Pink" noise is my favorite. It's white noise with more low frequencies. It drowns out a LOT of external noise including the snoring of the person sleeping next to me. They have dramatically improved the quality of my sleep (and, hence, my life!) and are just about the best $250 I have ever spent, on anything.

The first version of Sleepbuds that came out was plagued with problems, many of which I had. They came out with version 2 a couple of years later and these have been working much better. It's been maybe two years with them and I've had no problems at all. They do occasionally become less loud, which is due to earwax - and that is solved by cleaning the miniature loudspeaker with 99% rubbing alcohol. The major drawback is that they are so effective that you risk not being woken up by emergencies (fire alarm, etc).

[ixtap]

I invested in Bose over the ear, noise cancelling headphones (in ear don't fit my kitty bitty ears). To get true quiet, I still have to pick something to listen to to drown out certain things, but at least I get to control what I am listening to. I evidently learned to adjust them as I roll over even in my sleep.

We have also moved our boat to a small harbor and we are no longer in a military town, so fewer drills happening overhead. It works for the most part, but there have been jack hammers and compressors in use for most week days over the past two weeks and both the Blue Angels and Thunderbirds are doing flyovers next weekend, so there is no perfect. Even anchored out, we have had someone else come to the same cove and turn up their music or run the generator half the night.

[Zikoris]

I'd look for a very small town with mostly old people, no homeless people, and nothing open late. I could name a bunch of those around the various parts of Canada I've lived, but that's not super useful to you. Another option would be somewhere rural enough that you could buy a large enough property for noise to not be an issue. Do some trips out to spend a few days in potential places and see how they are for noise.

[wenchsenior]

I don't have advice, just solidarity. My dream is a 5 mile radius around my house with an invisible barrier that prevents all unwanted human entrance and human-caused noises. #fantasyhome

[TreeLeaf]

If you can still hear chain saws you're not rural enough.

My brother owns part of a 500 acre farm that is 5 miles off a gravel country road that no one drives on, which backs up to a greater than 200,000 acre national forest, in the lowest density populated area of the state. The nearest store or fast food is about 30 miles away and it's a gas station sub shop.

Driving a few thousand feet back on the farm through the woods you won't hear anything manmade, unless you brought it. No trains, planes, cars, chain saws, dogs, etc. Even the Verizon guy can't hear you. I'm sure you could find a similar farm to buy.

It is very peaceful and quiet but not an ideal place to have a heart attack.

[jeromedawg]

Throughout my life I've constantly searched for a QUIET place to live. Growing up it was in a typical suburban house that was occasionally quiet, but often with barking dogs on either side. As I moved into adulthood it was various apartments with tenants who liked to play loud music or otherwise disturb my peace. In the last few decades I've dealt with kids, dogs, loud music, the gamut. My current home is in an urban area that has gone through many phases of renewal; it went from homeless people hollering at 2am, to continuous construction noise, to young folks moving in and partying at all hours. Last night was yet another domestic dispute in the street at 4am, I'm really sick of it all.

I've looked into buying in a more rural area, but many homes are set on long narrow lots, meaning that the house itself is right next to another home.

So my question is, how do I find my peace? Is the solution a soundproof condo (are there such things)?  A house in the middle of nowhere? Or do I need to address this within my own personal sphere, with something like earplugs, acoustic panels or noise-canceling technology? And if I do seek out another home, what are the questions I need to ask?

Thanks in advance for whatever wisdom is offered.

Definitely don't live on the bottom floor with anyone above you or with shared walls. I learned the hard way. If you have to share walls though, that's better than living below (or above) someone. You probably need to find a detached SFH at the edge of a cul-de-sac (with no neighbor on the other side) or a home in the middle of a large lot otherwise. That's either going to be very expensive or in a location that may not be as desirable though, so you have to think about what you can afford and what you can give up.

If you want to deal with the current circumstances, there might be ways to do it but they could get costly. Maybe changing to double or triple pane windows, sound-proofing your rooms by adding certain types of insulation and adding layers of drywall, and then using earplugs and/or noise-cancelling headphones. White noise machines (or anything that makes sound that can 'mask' other sounds, like air purifiers, etc) can help.

For that home in the rural area, have you knocked on any of the residents' doors who live there and gotten a feel for the neighbors and neighborhood? It's probably a good idea to talk to the neighbors and ask if there's a "party house" in the neighborhood, or how quiet/noisy it tends to be. Also, go by at different times of the day (night time, afternoon, morning, etc) over the course of multiple days (weekdays and weekends) to get a better feel for what the neighborhood is like. Just because they're narrow lots doesn't mean that it's going to be noisy. The best way to find out is by looking for yourself (to the best extent that you can) and talking to the people who live there.

[ChickenStash]

I wish I had a good suggestion. I started out in apartments when I was younger and eventually went for suburban living but the noise and, more importantly, the obnoxious people just stick around. If people were even slightly considerate of others it probably wouldn't bother me as much.

Last year the family across the street rented something like this thing to paint the second floor of their home. I'm a big proponent of "overkill is underrated" but geez. For a week it was VROOOM...SQUEEEEEL...BEEP...BEEP...BEEP...CLUNK every 20 minutes or so as they moved it a few feet at a time. Later in the year they had a wood chipper and ran it a few minutes at a time for a few days to clean up some branches. They also have a megawatt of outdoor lighting so they can be visually obnoxious, too.

The next-door neighbor feels the need to mow his lawn 3x a week with a mower that has a blown-out muffler. They also have dogs that bark at everything when they are outside. I've been in the garage working for 4-5 hours straight and the dogs have barked the entire time.

Then, of course, there are the crotch rockets and unmuffled bro-dozers out on the main road zooming around at all hours and the rickety work trailers crashing through the neighborhood during the day.

My personal solution is that when I get to a FIRE point I'll probably find myself a cabin in the middle of some heavily wooded acreage - at least 20. It's not a complete cure but it might keep things at bay. A few years ago I was looking at a place with 200ac for a reasonable price. It needed some work and it was too far in the boonies for me to still do my job so I had to drop it.

[Metalcat]

If you can still hear chain saws you're not rural enough.

My brother owns part of a 500 acre farm that is 5 miles off a gravel country road that no one drives on, which backs up to a greater than 200,000 acre national forest, in the lowest density populated area of the state. The nearest store or fast food is about 30 miles away and it's a gas station sub shop.

Driving a few thousand feet back on the farm through the woods you won't hear anything manmade, unless you brought it. No trains, planes, cars, chain saws, dogs, etc. Even the Verizon guy can't hear you. I'm sure you could find a similar farm to buy.

It is very peaceful and quiet but not an ideal place to have a heart attack.

There's a difference between living rural and owning a ton of land. Where I live in Newfoundland is very rural, but due to complex reasons, the houses are *very* close together, so you will drive for hours and then suddenly see 6 houses on top of each other and then nothing for a long time.

But yes, if you want to exclude human noise, you have to have no people around, which usually means having to own enough land to push humans off to a far enough perimeter not to hear them. But that kind of land ownership can be a serious commitment.

[TreeLeaf]

If you can still hear chain saws you're not rural enough.

My brother owns part of a 500 acre farm that is 5 miles off a gravel country road that no one drives on, which backs up to a greater than 200,000 acre national forest, in the lowest density populated area of the state. The nearest store or fast food is about 30 miles away and it's a gas station sub shop.

Driving a few thousand feet back on the farm through the woods you won't hear anything manmade, unless you brought it. No trains, planes, cars, chain saws, dogs, etc. Even the Verizon guy can't hear you. I'm sure you could find a similar farm to buy.

It is very peaceful and quiet but not an ideal place to have a heart attack.

There's a difference between living rural and owning a ton of land. Where I live in Newfoundland is very rural, but due to complex reasons, the houses are *very* close together, so you will drive for hours and then suddenly see 6 houses on top of each other and then nothing for a long time.

But yes, if you want to exclude human noise, you have to have no people around, which usually means having to own enough land to push humans off to a far enough perimeter not to hear them. But that kind of land ownership can be a serious commitment.

Right - yeah there is a difference for sure. And there is a commitment of both time and money to own a farm. That's just the only real example I can think of as truly quiet - where you own enough property in the middle of nowhere and no one else is around you.

There is 'rural' where one owns an acre next to a few other houses, which is what most people think of as 'rural' these days. Then there is in the middle of nowhere where you can't see or hear anything man made...which is more of what I think of as 'rural' because a lot of my biological family lives in these sorts of 'in the middle of nowhere' areas that are gated off and you can't see the trailer from the gravel road. They generally live in those areas because they are hiding from the government, or from police, or doctors, or...therapists. ;) lol Not really because they are avoiding noise.

I live next to train tracks, with four kids and several tvs, tablets, gaming consoles, computers, and motorcyles going down the road and the neighbors dog barking constantly. Noise is a constant part of my life and rarely bothers me. If it bothers me I just put in 10 dollar headphones and crank up the music... :)

The best solution I have found for noise is more noise.

[GuitarStv]

If you know that you're going to live in a place for a long time, it's possible to do very good soundproofing.  I have helped people soundproof rooms so they can play acoustic drums at full volume and not bother their next door neighbours.  If you've ever heard a heavy handed drummer, you know that this is a pretty huge accomplishment.

It's more costly and time consuming than traditional building though, and you'll lose floor space doing this (double framed walls with an air gap, very long HVAC runs with multiple turns, multiple sets of windows, double layered drywall, lots of rockwool and heavy vinyl sheets to add mass to the walls, floating floor to decouple, etc.).  But that would enable you to always have a quiet/silent study or bedroom to retreat too when you need it . . . done properly you're looking at really massive reduction of noise transmission.

[Metalcat]

If you can still hear chain saws you're not rural enough.

My brother owns part of a 500 acre farm that is 5 miles off a gravel country road that no one drives on, which backs up to a greater than 200,000 acre national forest, in the lowest density populated area of the state. The nearest store or fast food is about 30 miles away and it's a gas station sub shop.

Driving a few thousand feet back on the farm through the woods you won't hear anything manmade, unless you brought it. No trains, planes, cars, chain saws, dogs, etc. Even the Verizon guy can't hear you. I'm sure you could find a similar farm to buy.

It is very peaceful and quiet but not an ideal place to have a heart attack.

There's a difference between living rural and owning a ton of land. Where I live in Newfoundland is very rural, but due to complex reasons, the houses are *very* close together, so you will drive for hours and then suddenly see 6 houses on top of each other and then nothing for a long time.

But yes, if you want to exclude human noise, you have to have no people around, which usually means having to own enough land to push humans off to a far enough perimeter not to hear them. But that kind of land ownership can be a serious commitment.

Right - yeah there is a difference for sure. And there is a commitment of both time and money to own a farm. That's just the only real example I can think of as truly quiet - where you own enough property in the middle of nowhere and no one else is around you.

There is 'rural' where one owns an acre next to a few other houses, which is what most people think of as 'rural' these days. Then there is in the middle of nowhere where you can't see or hear anything man made...which is more of what I think of as 'rural' because a lot of my biological family lives in these sorts of 'in the middle of nowhere' areas that are gated off and you can't see the trailer from the gravel road. They generally live in those areas because they are hiding from the government, or from police, or doctors, or...therapists. ;) lol Not really because they are avoiding noise.

I live next to train tracks, with four kids and several tvs, tablets, gaming consoles, computers, and motorcyles going down the road and the neighbors dog barking constantly. Noise is a constant part of my life and rarely bothers me. If it bothers me I just put in 10 dollar headphones and crank up the music... :)

The best solution I have found for noise is more noise.

But that's not what people think of as "rural" these days, that's always been considered rural. Rural just means outside of heavily populated areas. So whether someone has a ton of land or whether they have a postage stamp sized lawn and a neighbour a few feet away, if they are far from a heavily populated area, they're rural. If they're very far from any heavily populated area, then they're remote.

My other house is in a small remote, rural fishing village. And all of the houses are practically piled on top of one another. That's just a weird Newfie thing they do.

[TreeLeaf]

If you can still hear chain saws you're not rural enough.

My brother owns part of a 500 acre farm that is 5 miles off a gravel country road that no one drives on, which backs up to a greater than 200,000 acre national forest, in the lowest density populated area of the state. The nearest store or fast food is about 30 miles away and it's a gas station sub shop.

Driving a few thousand feet back on the farm through the woods you won't hear anything manmade, unless you brought it. No trains, planes, cars, chain saws, dogs, etc. Even the Verizon guy can't hear you. I'm sure you could find a similar farm to buy.

It is very peaceful and quiet but not an ideal place to have a heart attack.

There's a difference between living rural and owning a ton of land. Where I live in Newfoundland is very rural, but due to complex reasons, the houses are *very* close together, so you will drive for hours and then suddenly see 6 houses on top of each other and then nothing for a long time.

But yes, if you want to exclude human noise, you have to have no people around, which usually means having to own enough land to push humans off to a far enough perimeter not to hear them. But that kind of land ownership can be a serious commitment.

Right - yeah there is a difference for sure. And there is a commitment of both time and money to own a farm. That's just the only real example I can think of as truly quiet - where you own enough property in the middle of nowhere and no one else is around you.

There is 'rural' where one owns an acre next to a few other houses, which is what most people think of as 'rural' these days. Then there is in the middle of nowhere where you can't see or hear anything man made...which is more of what I think of as 'rural' because a lot of my biological family lives in these sorts of 'in the middle of nowhere' areas that are gated off and you can't see the trailer from the gravel road. They generally live in those areas because they are hiding from the government, or from police, or doctors, or...therapists. ;) lol Not really because they are avoiding noise.

I live next to train tracks, with four kids and several tvs, tablets, gaming consoles, computers, and motorcyles going down the road and the neighbors dog barking constantly. Noise is a constant part of my life and rarely bothers me. If it bothers me I just put in 10 dollar headphones and crank up the music... :)

The best solution I have found for noise is more noise.

But that's not what people think of as "rural" these days, that's always been considered rural. Rural just means outside of heavily populated areas. So whether someone has a ton of land or whether they have a postage stamp sized lawn and a neighbour a few feet away, if they are far from a heavily populated area, they're rural. If they're very far from any heavily populated area, then they're remote.

My other house is in a small remote, rural fishing village. And all of the houses are practically piled on top of one another. That's just a weird Newfie thing they do.

If the goal is to be quiet though, wouldn't it be better to be farther away from your immediate neighbors?

If you are rural, and you can still hear your neighbor shooting guns, running a chain saw, lawn mower, 4 wheelers, etc, it seems like this doesn't really accomplish the goal of finding peace and quiet. I know several people close to cities who are 'rural' with a couple acres which have to deal with tons of noise. To me that doesn't really accomplish the goal of having a quiet environment. It seems like it would be better to be far far away from your neighbors.

I'm not saying your house is not 'rural' because you have immediate neighbors. I'm saying there are places in the world with extremely low population density, where you are far away from your neighbors, which may be more quiet than what people think of as rural.

If someone really wants peace and quiet, it might be better to seek out one of those areas where houses are tens of thousands of feet apart, not a hundred feet apart.

ETA: Maybe I should be using the word 'backcountry' here or 'wilderness' instead of 'more rural'.

[Metalcat]

If the goal is to be quiet though, wouldn't it be better to be farther away from your immediate neighbors?

If you are rural, and you can still hear your neighbor shooting guns, running a chain saw, lawn mower, 4 wheelers, etc, it seems like this doesn't really accomplish the goal of finding peace and quiet. I know several people close to cities who are 'rural' with a couple acres which have to deal with tons of noise. To me that doesn't really accomplish the goal of having a quiet environment. It seems like it would be better to be far far away from your neighbors.

I'm not saying your house is not 'rural' because you have immediate neighbors. I'm saying there are places in the world with extremely low population density, where you are far away from your neighbors, which may be more quiet than what people think of as rural.

If someone really wants peace and quiet, it might be better to seek out one of those areas where houses are tens of thousands of feet apart, not a hundred feet apart.

Yep, I understand that point. I was making a total side point unrelated to the noise issue. I was just clarifying that rural doesn't be default mean owning a ton of land and not living near people.

People make a lot of assumptions about what rural living is like, often picturing some vast acreage. but that's a very, very specific kind of rural living.

[TreeLeaf]

If the goal is to be quiet though, wouldn't it be better to be farther away from your immediate neighbors?

If you are rural, and you can still hear your neighbor shooting guns, running a chain saw, lawn mower, 4 wheelers, etc, it seems like this doesn't really accomplish the goal of finding peace and quiet. I know several people close to cities who are 'rural' with a couple acres which have to deal with tons of noise. To me that doesn't really accomplish the goal of having a quiet environment. It seems like it would be better to be far far away from your neighbors.

I'm not saying your house is not 'rural' because you have immediate neighbors. I'm saying there are places in the world with extremely low population density, where you are far away from your neighbors, which may be more quiet than what people think of as rural.

If someone really wants peace and quiet, it might be better to seek out one of those areas where houses are tens of thousands of feet apart, not a hundred feet apart.

Yep, I understand that point. I was making a total side point unrelated to the noise issue. I was just clarifying that rural doesn't be default mean owning a ton of land and not living near people.

People make a lot of assumptions about what rural living is like, often picturing some vast acreage. but that's a very, very specific kind of rural living.

Ah - ok.

I think maybe I should be using the word 'backcountry' for what I mean or 'wilderness' perhaps.

It isn't simply an area with huge farms. It's a huge farm surrounded by woods and national forest where no one can legally build a dwelling.

[Metalcat]

If the goal is to be quiet though, wouldn't it be better to be farther away from your immediate neighbors?

If you are rural, and you can still hear your neighbor shooting guns, running a chain saw, lawn mower, 4 wheelers, etc, it seems like this doesn't really accomplish the goal of finding peace and quiet. I know several people close to cities who are 'rural' with a couple acres which have to deal with tons of noise. To me that doesn't really accomplish the goal of having a quiet environment. It seems like it would be better to be far far away from your neighbors.

I'm not saying your house is not 'rural' because you have immediate neighbors. I'm saying there are places in the world with extremely low population density, where you are far away from your neighbors, which may be more quiet than what people think of as rural.

If someone really wants peace and quiet, it might be better to seek out one of those areas where houses are tens of thousands of feet apart, not a hundred feet apart.

Yep, I understand that point. I was making a total side point unrelated to the noise issue. I was just clarifying that rural doesn't be default mean owning a ton of land and not living near people.

People make a lot of assumptions about what rural living is like, often picturing some vast acreage. but that's a very, very specific kind of rural living.

Ah - ok.

I think maybe I should be using the word 'backcountry' for what I mean or 'wilderness' perhaps.

It isn't simply an area with huge farms. It's a huge farm surrounded by woods and national forest where no one can legally build a dwelling.

Yeah. It's very hard to find properties like that, especially since they're often passed down generationally, or if they are sold, are often broken up and developed.

[TreeLeaf]

If the goal is to be quiet though, wouldn't it be better to be farther away from your immediate neighbors?

If you are rural, and you can still hear your neighbor shooting guns, running a chain saw, lawn mower, 4 wheelers, etc, it seems like this doesn't really accomplish the goal of finding peace and quiet. I know several people close to cities who are 'rural' with a couple acres which have to deal with tons of noise. To me that doesn't really accomplish the goal of having a quiet environment. It seems like it would be better to be far far away from your neighbors.

I'm not saying your house is not 'rural' because you have immediate neighbors. I'm saying there are places in the world with extremely low population density, where you are far away from your neighbors, which may be more quiet than what people think of as rural.

If someone really wants peace and quiet, it might be better to seek out one of those areas where houses are tens of thousands of feet apart, not a hundred feet apart.

Yep, I understand that point. I was making a total side point unrelated to the noise issue. I was just clarifying that rural doesn't be default mean owning a ton of land and not living near people.

People make a lot of assumptions about what rural living is like, often picturing some vast acreage. but that's a very, very specific kind of rural living.

Ah - ok.

I think maybe I should be using the word 'backcountry' for what I mean or 'wilderness' perhaps.

It isn't simply an area with huge farms. It's a huge farm surrounded by woods and national forest where no one can legally build a dwelling.

Yeah. It's very hard to find properties like that, especially since they're often passed down generationally, or if they are sold, are often broken up and developed.

Well...yes. This is true.

That's how my oldest brother got the farm.

It was my biological grandfathers farm. When he passed away his children sold most of it to my oldest brother, at an extremely discounted rate (something like 10% of the value) in order to keep the farm in the family. He is planning on passing it down to his son, and so on.

It might be hard to find a farm surrounded by national forest and woods, but there are a few backcountry properties with a few acres in the woods in sparsely populated areas that may be pretty quiet as well that I occasionally see go up for sale for fairly cheap.

I would look at population density maps, then find the lowest population density in the area of your choosing, then search for cheap properties with wooded acreage.

I specifically say cheap here not to save money. The cheapest properties tend to be the most remote, lacking the most amenities, and the farthest away from civilization. Ergo they should be quiet.

Realistically though it might be easier just to find an all brick house with a finished basement and triple pane windows in a quiet cal-de sac in a subdivision somewhere.

[Malossi792]

Didn't read all the replies, but here come my thoughts anyway.
First of all, real silence will possibly be disappointing if you have a slight tinnitus like most adults. If you do have it, no real silence is possible, I'm sorry (see also: Van Gogh).
If you're just looking for a way to enjoy audio without blasting it full volume (thus slowly exacerbating said tinnitus) I recommend ANC in-ear earphones. I've just bought a pair and they're AMAZING.
Now I can listen to music on the bus, at a soft volume and still enjoy every sound, not just those that blast through all the loud noise. Strongly recommended, and now the technology is cheap enough to be a 'cheap thing that makes you happy '.

[hooplady]

Thanks to everyone for your replies, I didn't know I would hit a nerve with this subject!

As for adapting my current house, some options (replacing windows) are out since I live in a designated historic district. My house also happens to be very close to adjoining homes and quite close to the street. Main bedroom is in the front of course, I've considered moving my sleeping space into one of the smaller bedrooms in the back.

I am indeed rather sensitive to some sounds more than others. In my current neighborhood we have several train crossings, a highway about a half-mile away, and I can hear ship's horns from the nearby port. Those sounds seem to be fine, it's the other, sharper sounds that set my teeth on edge.

I do think the longer-term solution is a change of residence which may also move me a bit closer to family - something I need to consider as I get older. A close relative suffers from tinnitus and often sleeps with the television on. I thought that was completely nuts, but have found that it somehow works for me as well. Running a fan or air purifier and wearing earplugs is healthier though.

[Metalcat]

Thanks to everyone for your replies, I didn't know I would hit a nerve with this subject!

As for adapting my current house, some options (replacing windows) are out since I live in a designated historic district. My house also happens to be very close to adjoining homes and quite close to the street. Main bedroom is in the front of course, I've considered moving my sleeping space into one of the smaller bedrooms in the back.

I am indeed rather sensitive to some sounds more than others. In my current neighborhood we have several train crossings, a highway about a half-mile away, and I can hear ship's horns from the nearby port. Those sounds seem to be fine, it's the other, sharper sounds that set my teeth on edge.

I do think the longer-term solution is a change of residence which may also move me a bit closer to family - something I need to consider as I get older. A close relative suffers from tinnitus and often sleeps with the television on. I thought that was completely nuts, but have found that it somehow works for me as well. Running a fan or air purifier and wearing earplugs is healthier though.

No nerve hit, Tree Leaf and I are friends who just like to natter at each other over details.

The additional info helps.

So it doesn't sound like you need quiet at all based on the sounds that you are comfortable with. It sounds like you are fine with a lot of chill ambient sounds, but are bothered by disruptive sounds.

I totally relate to this. I'm the kind of person who couldn't study in a library because of the horrifically obnoxious human sounds. Someone was eating carrots in the library one day and I just about had a nervous breakdown. I mean, I was super stressed and sleep deprived, but I was seriously almost in tears it was so LOUD.

A place like my apartment would be ideal for you then, somewhere with excellent soundproofing and really good windows. I would also consider a high-rise if you can find a really well soundproofed one. Being up high reduces so much city/people noise.

Our last place was a townhouse, which also had fantastic sound proofing. We shared a wall with a musician and I could barely hear him practicing and only if I was in the adjacent room.

However, a few houses down was a daycare and if the windows were open, the sound of screaming kids always set my nerves on edge. It was okay if I closed all of the windows, but who wants their windows shut all summer?

I now associate being on ground level with being subjected to a lot of human noises.

If I was still living a high stress life, I would never choose to live on the ground where the jarring human sounds are so damn close. 20 stories up it mostly fades into a generic white noise.