Author Topic: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary  (Read 6874 times)

Lanthiriel

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Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« on: April 13, 2017, 02:43:19 PM »
We get a lot of "should I take Job A or Job B?" questions around here. I would love to collect stories from people who have chosen a lower paying job for lifestyle reasons. Or from those who struggled with the decision and took the money. How did it turn out? Any advice?

My situation: I'm currently trying to decide if I'm insane to take a $70k job with small company (not a lot of room to make more money) in the suburbs over a $85k job with a mega firm (lots of room for advancement) that forces me to stay close to downtown. (Feel free to visit my journal if you want to listen to me whine about how much I hate urban living: https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/journals/bigger-and-brighter-things/msg1513756/#msg1513756)


TheAnonOne

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #1 on: April 13, 2017, 02:46:01 PM »
If you plan on FIRE next year you won't have time for growth anyway. So take that timeline into perspective.

My wife was looking at school for a new career ect ect, but we are looking at barebones in 3 years and full FI in 5ish years. 2 to 4 years for school really doesn't fit. (It was for money, not passion)

That being said, I have a hard time turning down 15k when you're only making 70. That's basically an entirely funded 401k...

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« Last Edit: April 13, 2017, 02:48:10 PM by TheAnonOne »

Lanthiriel

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #2 on: April 13, 2017, 02:59:46 PM »
If you plan on FIRE next year you won't have time for growth anyway. So take that timeline into perspective.

My wife was looking at school for a new career ect ect, but we are looking at barebones in 3 years and full FI in 5ish years. 2 to 4 years for school really doesn't fit. (It was for money, not passion)

That being said, I have a hard time turning down 15k when you're only making 70. That's basically an entirely funded 401k...

I have a good 10-15 working years left. Which probably makes it even more insane to turn down that much money early in my career.

TheAnonOne

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #3 on: April 13, 2017, 03:03:47 PM »
Well over 15 years, 15k invested yearly at 6% is over $350,000.

Does that change the picture?

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TreesBikesLove

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #4 on: April 13, 2017, 03:08:39 PM »
I live in a Suburb of Portland and think you're crazy to want to live here for LESS money. The rent is only marginally cheaper and everything fun downtown is a half hour MAX ride away. Wasteful spending on car infrastructure abounds and nobody cares that they can't walk to a grocery store.

edit: Now that I've read a bit of your journal I can see why you don't like living in Portland: driving sucks there. I agree that driving sucks in Portland but comeon... Portland is Biketown, USA! It is a shame that you don't feel safe riding in traffic because there has been so much effort to improve the situation there. I promise you that biking in the suburbs is MORE scary and MORE dangerous than downtown.
« Last Edit: April 13, 2017, 03:18:13 PM by shaybro »

bacchi

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #5 on: April 13, 2017, 03:27:55 PM »
Walking is also an option. We walked everywhere in Portland -- to movies downtown, to TJs and FMs, to restaurants, to bars, to Forest Park. Living in a cramped apartment didn't matter since we were gone much of the time.

Zero Degrees

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #6 on: April 13, 2017, 06:51:15 PM »
I'll  bite. Less  than two years ago, I had a job with a 90 minute commute each way. That was if there was no traffic,  accidents,  or inclement weather. I'm in the Midwest,  so enough said on that.

I was leaving home at 6 am and getting home at 8 pm. I took an 18k annual pay cut to work 16 miles from home.

The money I'm saving in gas, less eating out, and less taxes made the cut more tolerable. The greatest advantage is having a better quality of life.  I was so exhausted! Sometimes money is just money. I have no interest in early retirement and enjoy working,  but I didn't want to burn myself out too fast.

I still have a great salary and comfortable life. I have no regrets.

PS. I also became single and have 2 teens at home full time.
« Last Edit: April 13, 2017, 06:57:48 PM by Zero Degrees »

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #7 on: April 13, 2017, 07:02:22 PM »
Walking is also an option. We walked everywhere in Portland -- to movies downtown, to TJs and FMs, to restaurants, to bars, to Forest Park. Living in a cramped apartment didn't matter since we were gone much of the time.

+1. I haven't been over to your journal, but we lived in Nob Hill for 2 years, and walked everywhere. The co-op and trader joe's for groceries (and occasionally the safeway in the pearl), and I could easily walk to upper mclean trail head for a run or a hike. We lived in a small 1br (500 sq ft) but embraced minimalism, got rid of 3/4 of our stuff, and savored the experience. I grew up on 72 acres, so it was a HUGE adjustment, but I firmly believe in blooming where you are planted.

We had friends in Beaverton, and others in Gresham and troudale. And they all absolutely sucked for visiting. Friendships withered because we never made it out there.

If it weren't for wanting kids and not wanting to raise them downtown, we probably would have stayed. I would go daily to parks in the area, we would ride the streetcar to the farmer's market first thing saturday morning, etc. I don't like crowds and I never saw myself as a "city person" and yet I managed to love it. It took a few months to get used to it, for sure. =)

Whatever you choose, best of luck.

Oh, and to the original question: yes, I took a much lower paying job, but I get big wins in flexibility this way, and I'm not the primary breadwinner for the family. The ability to come and go from my field as we travel and have kids is a higher priority for us.

2Birds1Stone

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #8 on: April 13, 2017, 07:35:24 PM »
I am planning on transitioning from a higher paying more stressful job to a fun low paying job in a few years.

Currently I want to make as much $$ as possible in my late 20's and early 30's

Once I get to ~15-20x + living expenses I want to take a sabbatical for a year or so, then go back to work at a lower paying job while my portfolio grows to ~25X living expenses.


Murse

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #9 on: April 13, 2017, 09:52:02 PM »
I am currently struggling with a semi similar situation and posted about it previously, however mine is an hour cut for a shorter commute, more tolerable work and not being told "hey, you have to stay for the next shift."

Larsg

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #10 on: April 14, 2017, 12:16:55 AM »
Great question that I crossed many times in my youth and mid range career. I always combined the decision with which opportunity will challenged me more, help me grow professionally and personally. Which company between your choices has the kind of people you can learn from the most that you would also like to learn from. Way back in 2003, when the market was on fire for jobs, I had a job in down town Chicago that I absolutely loved. I had just bought a small apartment in the City and absolutely loved where i lived and did not want to leave. The job however was stagnating and I had lined up multiple offers - a few very high paying in Chicago, one in NJ, and a slightly lessor paying job in AZ due to the cost of living. Now this was a really hard decision to leave my firm, Chicago, and the Apartment I just bought but...the new job offered a learning experience I could not turn down and the people I was going to be working with were amazing. I took it, hated leaving Chicago, the loop, my apartment, the new friends and lifestyle I had just made. I hated AZ even more but the learning was an opportunity of a lifetime and that learned propelled a career I could never have imagined. Now I am FI and can retire if I want but choose to work as this notion is all new to me - thank you M's and Jacob :). I still always wonder what my life might have been had I stayed but nothing compares to the opportunities I have had since then. The friends I have made and the life skills I developed from taking risks in locations and roles I was open to that showed up. It was being  open to the possibilities that I think drew the opportunities. I will say that small companies can be challenging, like small towns so make sure you really like the culture if you go that route. Big Companies can have the opposite feel where you can easily get lost in the shuffle. At the same time, big, growing companies that are still relatively young - e.g 20-30 years old, especially in tech, still run a lot like the wild west so anything goes in terms of opportunity. Best of luck to you and lets know how it turns out.

FLBiker

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #11 on: April 14, 2017, 06:56:32 AM »
My director was recently promoted, and if I applied for his job, I strongly suspect (based on convos with him and others) that I would have gotten it.  I didn't apply.  I make $80K.  I'm not sure what the salary would have been, but I suspect at least $100K, and probably higher.

For me, though, it was a no brainer.  My current job allows me to work 8-5 virtually all the time (very rarely do I have to monitor work email outside of those hours).  The director is ALWAYS on email / phone, with folks in the US, UK and around the world (meaning email never sleeps).  I never travel (I like travelling, but I have a 2 yo and don't want to travel right now), the director routinely goes on weeks long marketing / recruiting trips.  When folks visit our center (a couple of times a month) the director wines and dines them.  I hate doing stuff like that (in part because I find wining and dining boring, but mostly because it happens during post-work hours).  My job is low stress, whereas he is constantly getting pulled in multiple directions by lots of dotted lines.  Etc.

Even for double the salary ($160K) I wouldn't take that job.  Sure, it means I could FIRE in a couple of years, but I would lose those years with my kid.  Not interested.  My job enables me to have a decent worklife balance, and the director job absolutely doesn't (in large part because my previous director slept 4 hours a night and worked all the time).

Tellingly, we had no internal candidates for that position.  There were at least 4 of us that would have been seriously considered, had we applied.

Lanthiriel

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #12 on: April 14, 2017, 07:35:52 AM »
Thanks for the replies! The commute isn't much of a factor here (it's just terrible no matter which direction you go) and honestly the higher $$ job has more room for growth.

For those of you familiar with the Portland area, the situation is compounded by my husband working in Wilsonville. Right now we're living in SW Portland and basically splitting the difference. It would be nice if our jobs were closer so that we could live and work in one location.

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #13 on: April 14, 2017, 07:40:53 AM »
Thanks for the replies! The commute isn't much of a factor here (it's just terrible no matter which direction you go) and honestly the higher $$ job has more room for growth.

For those of you familiar with the Portland area, the situation is compounded by my husband working in Wilsonville. Right now we're living in SW Portland and basically splitting the difference. It would be nice if our jobs were closer so that we could live and work in one location.

God, to and from Wilsonville right now? When I have to go up to Mothership for my employer, I will literally go HOURS early to avoid the I5 BS at peak hours. Any chance he can work from home or similar on occasion? Or drive off peak, and go into the gym before work? Just throwing ideas out.

Sorry to hear about the split- I think that's the worst possible situation.

Lanthiriel

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #14 on: April 14, 2017, 07:45:48 AM »
Thanks for the replies! The commute isn't much of a factor here (it's just terrible no matter which direction you go) and honestly the higher $$ job has more room for growth.

For those of you familiar with the Portland area, the situation is compounded by my husband working in Wilsonville. Right now we're living in SW Portland and basically splitting the difference. It would be nice if our jobs were closer so that we could live and work in one location.

God, to and from Wilsonville right now? When I have to go up to Mothership for my employer, I will literally go HOURS early to avoid the I5 BS at peak hours. Any chance he can work from home or similar on occasion? Or drive off peak, and go into the gym before work? Just throwing ideas out.

Sorry to hear about the split- I think that's the worst possible situation.

He's an engineer who does a lot of field work. Some days he doesn't have to go into the office (he just does his sites them comes home to do reports), but today for example he's working on a site near Battle Ground that he has to be at by 8am and needs to pick up some extra equipment at the office before heading out. We're... busy.

BallerOnABudget

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #15 on: April 14, 2017, 07:54:05 AM »
A little over a year ago, I took a job with a lower salary. The benefits at the new job were a vast improvement, but it was still a net decrease in income. BUT, I went from a smaller company that had recently been bought and jobs were moving to India left and right to a larger, more stable company with WAY more job security. Going to work every day wondering if this would be the day we lose another client and shut the doors and fearing that the new management would decide that someone in India could do my job just as well for half the cost...man those days were stressful.

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #16 on: April 14, 2017, 08:18:25 AM »
Thanks for the replies! The commute isn't much of a factor here (it's just terrible no matter which direction you go) and honestly the higher $$ job has more room for growth.

For those of you familiar with the Portland area, the situation is compounded by my husband working in Wilsonville. Right now we're living in SW Portland and basically splitting the difference. It would be nice if our jobs were closer so that we could live and work in one location.

God, to and from Wilsonville right now? When I have to go up to Mothership for my employer, I will literally go HOURS early to avoid the I5 BS at peak hours. Any chance he can work from home or similar on occasion? Or drive off peak, and go into the gym before work? Just throwing ideas out.

Sorry to hear about the split- I think that's the worst possible situation.

He's an engineer who does a lot of field work. Some days he doesn't have to go into the office (he just does his sites them comes home to do reports), but today for example he's working on a site near Battle Ground that he has to be at by 8am and needs to pick up some extra equipment at the office before heading out. We're... busy.

Oh hey! Your husband sounds like my husband, haha. Work sites all over 3 states. He gets a lot of time from home though, but then will have stretches where it is All Fieldwork, All The Time.

I feel for you! The level of demanding that his work is, is part of why I went for an easier schedule. Both of us working full time plus was a nightmare, and super damaging for our health and harmony.

Poeirenta

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #17 on: April 14, 2017, 11:00:16 AM »
DH and I both took big honking pay cuts to move out to the country. After 5 years I am back to what I earned when I left, but he's still at about half of what he made in the big city. For our area, we make quite a bit though, so it's somewhat relative. For us, it's totally worth it to live this dream we nurtured for a long time. I'm not sure that would be the same if the change hadn't been so dramatic or gotten us where we are now.

We are actually looking at lowering our incomes even more by going to 32 hour weeks so that we have more time to work and play on our land.

mindy

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #18 on: April 14, 2017, 11:17:30 AM »
My bachelor's degree is in finance/banking. I absolutely loved my classes and they taught me so much about how to manage my own personal finances, which is priceless. However, I HATED working in the banking industry. I had an entry level position straight out of college and it was so stressful. Plus, many things that I was pushed to do were against my values, like being required to have a certain number of loan applications per quarter. Why would I want to push people to get unsecured personal loans for things that they don't need at high interest rates?!?!?! So I left for a lower paying job in a different industry (tourism/recreation). I went from $50k a year (with opportunities to make a lot more) to $30k a year, and I definitely do not regret it. I'm so much happier here and because DH and I don't spend that much anyway, it doesn't make a huge difference. Plus I now have a more flexible schedule that can accommodate side hustles. Yeah, we won't reach FI/RE as quickly, but I would rather take 10 years doing it rather than doing it in 5 and being miserable the whole time. I would completely understand if someone stayed with the higher paying job to RE more quickly, but I personally don't want to waste years of my life at a miserable job.

SisterX

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #19 on: April 14, 2017, 12:06:28 PM »
Not quite the same, but I opted to work part time (after taking a year off to be a SAHM) rather than full time because the stress to both of our schedules of having both of us work full time would have been INSANE. As Bracken_Joy said, it was not worth the risk to our health and happiness. Having me at home part time to take care of stuff that crops up, make appointments and cook and whatnot, has been endlessly helpful. Sure I could make a lot more money working full time, but we would outsource a lot more too. This seems like the perfect mix. I'm making money above and beyond what we pay for childcare, I like my coworkers, and my job is less stressful because I'm only part time so people don't feel that they can dump a whole bunch extra on me because I won't have time. I'm very content with this choice, even knowing that I'm giving up some opportunity cost by not working full time. We could save and invest more, but the daily grind and rat race has never made me happy and I'd miss out on the time with my kiddo while she's young. Plus, I think the journey to FI is just as important as getting there. If we're miserable on the path, is it really worthwhile?

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #20 on: April 14, 2017, 03:49:30 PM »
Not quite the same, but I opted to work part time (after taking a year off to be a SAHM) rather than full time because the stress to both of our schedules of having both of us work full time would have been INSANE. As Bracken_Joy said, it was not worth the risk to our health and happiness. Having me at home part time to take care of stuff that crops up, make appointments and cook and whatnot, has been endlessly helpful. Sure I could make a lot more money working full time, but we would outsource a lot more too. This seems like the perfect mix. I'm making money above and beyond what we pay for childcare, I like my coworkers, and my job is less stressful because I'm only part time so people don't feel that they can dump a whole bunch extra on me because I won't have time. I'm very content with this choice, even knowing that I'm giving up some opportunity cost by not working full time. We could save and invest more, but the daily grind and rat race has never made me happy and I'd miss out on the time with my kiddo while she's young. Plus, I think the journey to FI is just as important as getting there. If we're miserable on the path, is it really worthwhile?

Once again, we are totally on the same life wavelength. 100% this. We outsource more when I'm not part time. Plus there is more stress. All in all, it's really not worth it. The part time flexible position I have now is the perfect compromise.

Lanthiriel

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #21 on: April 14, 2017, 04:03:14 PM »
These are all good stories, and the real takeaway for me is that the decision to take less money was made for much bigger reasons than I have: big commutes, babies, supporting spouse's career. For me it really just comes down to not wanting to deal with downtown. I think I might just be being a whiner.

I'm a bit jealous of the last two generations of my family who just went to work at the DOD at 18 without a college education and retired 30 years later with a sweet, high five-figure pension...

Rural

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #22 on: April 14, 2017, 07:02:25 PM »
Well, just this week I turned down a promotion and a raise that would have been over 25%, so I guess I'm in. I've been saying for three years that there was nothing that would get me to agree to be department chair, but somehow they didn't believe me. Seriously, our money keep growing without us doing anything at all, but time gets shorter and shorter.

Hargrove

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #23 on: April 14, 2017, 09:32:55 PM »
I'm looking to choose lifestyle over salary at some point. I'm not sure how soon, but the toxic environment at my current job is a messy endurance run. It feels like I run calculations every other week to bracket out different "minimums" vs sweet spots to get a meaningfully self-generating 'stache. I think if you're under 34, you should go with the raise while you're best able and most flexible with your time. If you're over 34, it's much more dependent on what you want by 45 (especially if you want a family).

EdwardMM

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #24 on: April 14, 2017, 09:47:06 PM »
I think it's definitely wise to take a "complete look" at the financial and personal picture. You know the income difference pretty clearly. What's the expense difference? Does the higher paying job also reduce expenses, or does it come with more?

I was in a position a year ago where I was choosing between three situations: 1) Stay at my current job which is flexible, mostly 9-5, and I enjoy everyone, 2) Take a VP role in another company where I would earn approximately 25% more in compensation but would have to work long hours, and 3) Take a partnership position with a small company where I would have taken a small pay cut, but would have a 20% ownership share in the company, and would be working "a lot" more than 9-5.

After much deliberation and some negotiating at my current position, I stayed where I was. Both options #2 and #3 would have paid more even with the increase my current company was able to give me, but looking at the totality of my family situation, I decided it was better just to stay put (which was also the safest of the three jobs).

In reality is probably pushes our retirement out by 2-4 years by not moving. But there were risks and challenges associated with the other jobs that just aren't present in my current position where I have earned a strong reputation.

We're also in a position where we are already saving 50% of our annual income. If we were in a position where we weren't saving much, or we had an opportunity to double our savings, or I didn't have as many kids as I do (5) - I might have taken the bigger risk and made the jump.

I feel as though everyone needs to make this decision for themselves, but the important thing is to have all the cards on the table and known as much as humanly possible. It's not a permanent decision, but it's a big decision to switch jobs.

Edward

Hargrove

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #25 on: April 15, 2017, 06:46:45 PM »
I think it's definitely wise to take a "complete look" at the financial and personal picture. You know the income difference pretty clearly. What's the expense difference? Does the higher paying job also reduce expenses, or does it come with more?

I was in a position a year ago where I was choosing between three situations: 1) Stay at my current job which is flexible, mostly 9-5, and I enjoy everyone, 2) Take a VP role in another company where I would earn approximately 25% more in compensation but would have to work long hours, and 3) Take a partnership position with a small company where I would have taken a small pay cut, but would have a 20% ownership share in the company, and would be working "a lot" more than 9-5.

After much deliberation and some negotiating at my current position, I stayed where I was. Both options #2 and #3 would have paid more even with the increase my current company was able to give me, but looking at the totality of my family situation, I decided it was better just to stay put (which was also the safest of the three jobs).

In reality is probably pushes our retirement out by 2-4 years by not moving. But there were risks and challenges associated with the other jobs that just aren't present in my current position where I have earned a strong reputation.

We're also in a position where we are already saving 50% of our annual income. If we were in a position where we weren't saving much, or we had an opportunity to double our savings, or I didn't have as many kids as I do (5) - I might have taken the bigger risk and made the jump.

I feel as though everyone needs to make this decision for themselves, but the important thing is to have all the cards on the table and known as much as humanly possible. It's not a permanent decision, but it's a big decision to switch jobs.

Edward

Haha you obviously made the right call.

Ask almost anyone who can't stand their job if they would work 9-5 in a solid position with good coworkers and still save 50% of their income. Let me know if anyone says no.

Lanthiriel

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #26 on: April 21, 2017, 09:00:39 AM »
I took Job A in the burbs! I got them to come up to $77k. I took EdwardMM's advice and made a spreadsheet of all the benefits and the costs associated with each, and Job A didn't quite win out, but it was close. Now I get to cancel my bus pass and my midday dog sitter (an insane expense that was necessary while I was commuting downtown), saving me $500/month on top of the $1000/mo raise over my current salary. Thanks for the input, guys!

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #27 on: April 21, 2017, 09:24:45 AM »
I took Job A in the burbs! I got them to come up to $77k. I took EdwardMM's advice and made a spreadsheet of all the benefits and the costs associated with each, and Job A didn't quite win out, but it was close. Now I get to cancel my bus pass and my midday dog sitter (an insane expense that was necessary while I was commuting downtown), saving me $500/month on top of the $1000/mo raise over my current salary. Thanks for the input, guys!

Wooohoo! Glad you made a choice, hope it is awesome for you! =)

EdwardMM

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Re: Choosing Lifestyle Over Salary
« Reply #28 on: April 21, 2017, 09:38:32 AM »
I took Job A in the burbs! I got them to come up to $77k. I took EdwardMM's advice and made a spreadsheet of all the benefits and the costs associated with each, and Job A didn't quite win out, but it was close. Now I get to cancel my bus pass and my midday dog sitter (an insane expense that was necessary while I was commuting downtown), saving me $500/month on top of the $1000/mo raise over my current salary. Thanks for the input, guys!

Congratulations and glad I had a small role in helping out! (I love the internet for that!)