I just assumed the OP was speaking in the second person but was actually referring to himself.
I do have some training in it. I did my undergrad in psych and did volunteer work at an abused women's shelter, which is where the majority of my training comes from. Women are more likely to throw things then men, who often hit an object. However, the majority do escalate to harming. This is not always but I personally would speak to a counselor. It may have been a reaction to the hormones after postpartum and stress, but I can't say that. Could it come to a point where you are under this level of stress again? That is a question I can't answer. But, you have one positive, you do realize that throwing things could cause damage, that is a positive.
Interesting. Thanks. Can I push you a bit though? By working at an abused women's shelter, you encountered those that did escalate to harming. In that sense, there might be some selective bias going on.
Life with young children is stressful, so, yes, of course I could encounter this kind of stress again. I am aware of my failings and proclivities (i.e. I let frustration build and then it can explode), but I've just never thought of myself as someone who is any more prone to violence than the next person. I think of my past couple throwing experiences along the same lines as someone who cuts - the pressure in your noggin is so profound that you find a way to outwardly express your inner turmoil. Would you say a cutter is someone more prone to violence as a whole?
I guess my question is - for those of us who might struggle with anger/depression issues - are we all just one step away from becoming Ray Rice/Susan Smith/insert violent abuser or murderer? Based on the responses to the OP, it appears that is the overall perception.
I had a friend whose husband once punched a hole in the wall. This was before they had four kids. Now they have a terrible marriage (hence why he punched the wall in the first place), but in the 15 years since he did that, he has never raised a hand to her or the children. In his case, it appears to not have been a sign of his pending abuse.
I guess this thread has really bothered me, in that I think some of the responses have been pretty extreme. Has what she has done really reached the level of a restraining order or that the person should fear for his life? I'm not saying it couldn't, but thankfully it hasn't reached that level. What she is doing is no doubt unacceptable, but I balk at the thought that she is a psycho, beyond redemption, or someone that no healthy person should be around.
Having said that, this doesn't sound like a healthy relationship. You have indicated that this isn't a one time thing, and if this was something that you had previously said would lead to you initiating a break-up then I would probably follow through. Just because she can be saved through counseling or other measures doesn't mean that you have to stay in the relationship or help her through her issues.