Long time lurker, first time post. Thanks in advance everyone.
I am a tenured, mid-career professor at a large state institution (you can probably guess by my username). My DW is a SAHM, and we have three young children: newborn, 2 yo and 4 yo. We are content, but not in love with our location. My sister-in-law lives in town, and we love her but she has her own life and can't provide a ton of help with the kids, and the DW could use some help. I do love my department, which is strong in my research area and I get along well with my colleagues. As you might expect, such an environment has really helped establish my research group and we are doing quite well. The DW job prospects for down the road are also a bit better here.
I recently received an outside offer from a deep pocketed, prestigious private school. The school is somewhat weaker in my research area, and while I think I would get along well with the members of the department, it's always impossible to predict until you get there. We think the location would be at least equally attractive for the family (lifestyle-wise, school-wise), and maybe even a bit more attractive. The big plus is that my parents would be 1 hour away, they are great, and would really help out.
The money on the table is significant as well. The COL is probably about the same between the two locations except the housing costs are significantly higher if we moved. Just to estimate:
Stay in current job - base salary ~$150K (9-month salary), with full summer pay (can basically count on this) ~$200K. House that would work = $575K.
Move - base salary ~$210K (9-month salary), with summer ~$270K. House that would work = $800K.
*Note that both of these options are a big increase over my current base salary which is ~$90K - we are grateful*
We have done all the budget calculations including taxes, mortgages, etc...and if we moved our monthly free, unbudgeted cash flow would be ~$2300 higher after taxes.
I hope that covers the big points. Both I and the DW are completely undecided. No question, this is a great problem to have but we could really use some advice. Thanks everyone!