My wife and I had a good talk last night. I hate scaring her, and of course I still don't know the seriousness of the firm's slowing trajectory, but I wanted to go ahead and have a talk (I'm sure one of many).
At this point, we are both good with doing 1, 2, and 4.
1 - Probably a no-brainer. It's just a matter of timing. I usually wander into his office a few times a month and we shoot the shit (mostly about non-law stuff), and we have a pretty good relationship. I'll be pretty blunt and say that I'm concerned about slowing business and just see how he responds.
2 - But I'll be careful and discreet. I'm not going to litter the landscape with resumes (that's not the best way to do it anyway, I know). Honestly, I'll probably focus on law jobs outside our niche, or non-law jobs that look appealing, so the chances of my boss finding out are slim.
4 - This is important to me, and frankly I enjoy it much more than I enjoy practicing law, so I'll keep grinding it out. Again, in a perfect world, the firm chugs along for another 22 months, we reach $300K net worth (or maybe even $325K), and my wife and I feel comfortable with me going down to part-time work, giving me full-time hours to grow my writing. We're currently increasing net worth at $5K/month clip through combination of investment, debt payment, and savings. We have $25K in cash savings, and we agree to keep that safe, given the situation.
EDITED TO ADD:
I have worked for 4 firms over the past 17 years, and I didn't like any of them.
Firm A hired me out of law school, but pay was very low (insurance defense) and with billable hours, the only real way to earn significantly more money was to bill more and more and more and more. I hit 1,800 hours most years but I never was going to be a guy who stayed until 9PM trying to hit 2,100.
Firm B was very professional, and the people were nice, but my god the subject matter (collections) was horribly boring. Basically I was told, "litigate these cases, but don't burn bridges with the defendants because the client wants them to come back some day. Oh, and try to bluff your way through most of this, because we really don't have any documents in most of our files."
Firm C turned out to be....well, let's just say not my kind of people. They cut corners and used tactics I did not approve of. The money was good, but I could not stay in good conscience.
Firm D is my current firm. I like the owner. I have a lot of freedom. My main concerns are the slowing business, the firm's practice, which has lost all appeal for me, and the constant, "what if owner gets hit by a bus tomorrow, or gets a divorce?" questions in my head, since he's the sole owner. If he get arrested, or seriously injured, or whatever, I'm screwed.
So maybe I just haven't found the right fit. Maybe I'm better cut out for government work. I say that because I'd appreciate good benefits and work-life balance, and not having to worry about bringing in business or competing with the sharks, but with gov't jobs, freedom goes out the window, and that's a big thing for me.