I am late to this party, and I know part of this reply is off topic, but it is surely relevant.
In all of her thousands of posts, I have no recollection of Frankies Girl ever being anything but kind, helpful and caring. IMHO, she did not deserve that snarky snark, nor any rebuke for defending herself.
To OP: more than the money, I am very sorry for your loss.
To boarder 42: Sorry for all you and your wife are dealing with right now. I noticed your posts have been a bit harder to decipher of late* and wondered if something was different in your life. Ugh. MC just blows, because there are so many unknowns, dashed hopes, broken dreams and nobody knows what to say, so your pain is often ignored. While you'll never forget this stunning pain, I hope it will be tempered by happiness still too come.
May I gently suggest changing tacks slightly and trying again? Instead of saying you're paying cash blithely, say it like it's gonna be vevvy, vevvy dif-fi-cult. "We're going to have to try to find some way to pay for this ourselves" might get a more sympathetic result. Seriously, it's well worth another approach. If you get the same person, try calling back until you get someone else.
*To be perfectly clear, I usually agree with what you have to say and enjoy your voice, but absent punctuation, it can be damn hard to decipher your meaning. I'm always afraid I'm missing something.