How do you pick where to move to/what path to take next in your life?
Yes, I know I should be discussing this with my husband; we already have. I already know his opinion (basically move somewhere more liberal and cosmopolitan and it's on me for the job situation because I'm the one with an actual career). Here are the choices I'm looking at:
Seattle
The Good: Could stay with the same company. Greater job opportunities for my husband, or for me to work with another company, as I'm in the tech industry. 90% of my professional contacts are based out of Seattle. Culturally it's a good fit (liberal, artsy, progressive). Within reasonable driving distance of both sets of parents. DH could continue with his same company (although I'd lobby for him not to since there are more job opportunities in Seattle and his job is pretty financially terrible). DH loves the weather (I'm neutral - we've both lived in the Seattle/Tacoma area before). Very dog-friendly city and I may be able to take my dog to work with me (although he has mild separation anxiety so I'm worried he'd cry and wouldn't be good at just hanging out at my desk when I'm in meetings).
The Bad: No friends who currently live there. Drive to parents terrible six months out of the year. I might need to pay for dog daycare/a dog walker.
The Ugly: Cost of living. Oh God, the cost of living. We would never own a house, and possibly never a condo with a 15 year mortgage and less than 30 minute commute. Oh God, the commutes unless you hemorrhage $$$ each month on housing costs. We're thinking about having a baby in the next two years, which means daycare (which costs more $$$ than anywhere else we'd consider moving to). I just keep thinking $2000/mo. rent and $2000/mo. daycare for one kid and holy crap there goes almost all of my current base salary (which for various reasons is the only salary that can be relied upon). Having a SAHP isn't an option because of security (me) and ego (him) issues.
Minneapolis/St. Paul
The Good: The majority of my extended family lives there. Generally a solid unemployment rate. Reasonable housing costs for big cities. Culturally it seems to be a good fit (fairly liberal, progressive, values education and the arts). I love the lake culture.
The Bad: High summer weather aka the humidity.
The Ugly: Winter weather - I keep telling myself it isn't as bad I think it is (heck, I grew up there and survived), but I'm afraid my time in the west has made me soft.
Stay Where I'm At (aka, keep riding the gravy train)
The Good: Getting paid a HCOL salary in a LCOL area if I keep the same job. Paid off house. The weather except for two months out of the year. Live within a 30 minute drive from both parents. All of our friends are here. In my current job I can go home on lunch to let my dog out. 15 minute or less commute.
The Bad: The weather two months out of the year (hot hot hot). Culturally out-of-sync (very conservative area, although there are pockets of like-minded people). I am ready to move on from my current job.
The Ugly: Limited job opportunities (no career progression for me or husband here). Husband hates it.
I know we aren't locked into one pathway forever. For example, we could move to Seattle for just a couple of years and then move somewhere else. We could buy a house in the Seattle area in a lower-cost place (Tacoma?) and have a bad commute for me for a few years to downtown Seattle until I take a lower-paying but higher-level job closer to home. I'm the type of person who gets overwhelmed by options and needs to problem solve all the things before making a decision. Anyone have experience with being this type of person and being able to tone it down so you can actually make a decision?