Author Topic: "You know what you need?"  (Read 31706 times)

onemorebike

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"You know what you need?"
« on: March 13, 2015, 08:00:26 PM »
Just coming from several visits with in laws and friends where my family and I have stayed with them for an extended period of time. During this time our kids (and us) have had the opportunity to appreciate other people's belongings that have led to many a crazy comment about things we really need. I thought i t would be fun to start a thread of unmustachian things that friends and family think we "need" and I'll start, let's include the impetus for the comment and why someone else thought we needed said thing.

Two this week:

Kids riding FILs horse on our visit to the farm, FIL's girlfriend tells us we need a pony for the girls (in spite of living in the city!)

Packing our minivan for the long trip with two kids, two adults and a dog, we're told what we "need" is a RV. (I told them I was too busy saving for a pony to buy an RV. ;)

I'm sure there are some great ones out there, what do you got?

BlueHouse

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #1 on: March 13, 2015, 08:02:51 PM »
Someone today to.d me I needed to buy the apple watch. 

marty998

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #2 on: March 13, 2015, 08:06:55 PM »
Been told I need a new phone for the last 7 years...

deborah

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #3 on: March 13, 2015, 08:10:53 PM »
I am often told I need a television - how could anyone survive without one? My neices tell me I need an iPad, iPod, iPhone and whatever else there is out there starting with an i.

Lyngi

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #4 on: March 13, 2015, 08:26:37 PM »
my fairly frugal dad told me I needed to hire a house cleaner a couple of times a month.  I have teenagers who SHOULD be able to clean up after themselves, sigh.   DD doesn't want her friends to come over because the house is "a mess."   Couple of these friends happen to be of the male persuasion, my dad thinks if the house is clean, they will all hang out over here where I can keep an eye on them.    May not be such a bad idea after all. 

sandandsun

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #5 on: March 13, 2015, 08:36:19 PM »
Cable - "what do the kids do without cable?"
Name brand food - "why do you all buy all of that off brand stuff? You should go to Kroger they have great sales!"
Lawn service- "you cut your own grass?! But it's huge!" ("And you're a girl", although that is usually only implied
A pool - "oh my god. You guys need a pool! I would come over all the time if you got one!"

I could go on and on... It seems like everybody is always telling us what we need/should buy...

sheepstache

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #6 on: March 13, 2015, 08:53:02 PM »

A pool - "oh my god. You guys need a pool! I would come over all the time if you got one!"


Perhaps they are secretly mustachian. If I thought they could afford it, I would totally encourage my friends to get a pool so I could come use it!

hodedofome

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #7 on: March 13, 2015, 09:41:59 PM »
I live in Texas and I definitely need a pool.

FWIW we have a 3 day rule for staying with family. After 3 days we are outta there. You'd be surprised how many fights and arguments start after 3 days with family, and how few you have if you follow this rule.

Frugalite

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #8 on: March 13, 2015, 09:45:56 PM »
I need another child. My only child is certainly just going to end up depressed and spoiled unless I pop out another one. ;-)

deborah

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #9 on: March 13, 2015, 09:47:14 PM »
FWIW we have a 3 day rule for staying with family. After 3 days we are outta there. You'd be surprised how many fights and arguments start after 3 days with family, and how few you have if you follow this rule.
Totally agree - I have the three day rule too!

Gone Fishing

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #10 on: March 13, 2015, 09:58:02 PM »
A big ass tractor, mower, truck, atv, etc...

TN_Steve

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #11 on: March 13, 2015, 10:02:03 PM »
There is hope (I think?)

I wracked my brain on this, and couldn't think of anything to add.  Perhaps, after several decades of seeing DW and I as "cheap," our friends/family just don't bother anymore.  Or, worst case, ignoring vehicles, cable, clothes, and pools, maybe they think we've already got it?  :-)

flamingo25

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #12 on: March 13, 2015, 10:25:15 PM »
Apparently I need a spa day and a fancy vacation. These would help me "just relax" which would in turn cure my infertility.

Also I need an SUV for the one child my husband and I hope to have or adopt.

HappyMargo

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #13 on: March 14, 2015, 01:36:29 AM »
Apparently I need my DH "with the job he has" to buy me "some sparkly things."   According to the source, I "deserve some diamonds."

I'm not a jewelry person & I guess coworkers are tired of seeing me wear the same pair of pearl stud earrings every day??  Expensive jewelry just makes me nervous I'll lose it, not to mention the price & add'l cost of insurance. No thanks!

DH knows me better though.  Normally we don't do gifts (prefer experiences together), but for Christmas my sweetie totally surprised me & got me a new bike! I cried over the thoughtfulness of that gift!!

Thegoblinchief

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #14 on: March 14, 2015, 06:05:55 AM »
Surprisingly, considering how cheaply we live, we almost never get this from family or friends.

I wish we could keep to the 3 day rule, but we only see my in-laws once a year, and my kids represent 75% of their grandkids, so my wife always wants to stay longer. Even though, every year as we drive away, we regret staying that long. I try to remind her of this fact each time we plan the new trip, but oh well...

humblefi

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #15 on: March 14, 2015, 06:51:14 AM »
I drive a 20 year old car. I have been told that I need to get a new car. Forget others saying it, my own family says it too. What is real amusing is how people find different ways to tell me I need a new car :-)

To be frank, I would like to drive a new car too...sometimes peer pressure gets to me and I go browse cars online and even build my dream configuration. But, after seeing the price, I realize that I like to be free more than I like driving a new car. I will push as long as I can...surprisingly, it has been 7 years of owning this car..the car has beaten even my most optimistic expectations and it is still running...touchwood! Wish me luck to keep making smart car financial decisions!!

Murse

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #16 on: March 14, 2015, 08:29:34 AM »
Nursing student, will graduate in June. My instructor came up to me at clinicals and goes "isn't it exciting, your gunna need a new car?" And I go "I don't think I'm going to get a new car, I just put 500$ into this one to keep it running" she goes "what kind of car is it?" Me"a 2005 chevy" her "yeah, your gunna need a new car."

DanielleS

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #17 on: March 14, 2015, 08:29:46 AM »
Hm, interesting question!

  • We obviously "need" a television--I've been getting that for years, since I've never bought a television. It used to be way more crazy (pre-Netflix, etc., etc.) than it is now. One of the biggest thrills about meeting my now-husband is that he didn't have a television either!
  • Truth be told, the biggest thing is that we "need" to just spend more money in general! I think some people assume we can't possibly be happy with our spending habits. It's like everyone assumes we're living hand-to-mouth. Perhaps it's because we don't have an expensive hobby besides traveling. If we had even one really expensive showpiece (like a really expensive car), I wonder if this judgemental behavior would cease?

I must admit it's mostly from relatives, my mother and my husband's parents and their friends, although there are definitely some acquaintances of ours from whom I've felt this kind of looking-down attitude. And then they have to go off to their job in the morning!??!

justajane

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #18 on: March 14, 2015, 08:43:44 AM »
Not very many of these for us. Mostly our friends keep their opinions to themselves, as do we. The only two I can think of are that we "need" a minivan now that we have three kids, and that I "need" a smartphone. Otherwise, nothing.

I will admit that I have told my 75 year old father that he "needs" a riding mower. But, in my defense, they have a big ass front and back yards, and I worry about him keeling over in the 100 degree heat. I want him around for a while. His compromise? He finally got a self-propelled mower last year.

sugarsnap

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #19 on: March 14, 2015, 08:47:00 AM »
A real house for the kids. We own a condo, it's cheap so we can afford for mom to work part time while still saving, going on small vacations, paying for sports, etc. a regular house would bump our payment up by 1k accounting for taxes and all that comes along with taking care of a house. But hey, we have a community pool so we don't get that one!

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #20 on: March 14, 2015, 09:45:32 AM »
I was telling a coworker how I want a used pop up camper someday for 1-2k and I would just fix it up with new mattresses or paint or whatever.  He told me not to mess with that "junk" and just buy what he has.  He said I need a big fifth wheel camper and a big truck to pull it. 

In a later conversation he said he will never be able to retire because he has no savings. Ha
« Last Edit: March 14, 2015, 09:47:15 AM by Stlbroke »

ender

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #21 on: March 14, 2015, 09:54:49 AM »
New/newer car.

Apparently buying a nice vehicle is a rite of passage after starting work fulltime...

Bookworm

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #22 on: March 14, 2015, 10:26:06 AM »
My mom keeps telling me that I need to have my hair chemically straightened. Um, why? This is the way you made me! (That is...with wavy hair, and without the gene that makes one care about fashionable hair)

stlbrah

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #23 on: March 14, 2015, 10:38:45 AM »
ex gf said I needed a cashmere sweater.

As a man, I didn't feel the need to pamper myself with softness for $500

2ndTimer

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #24 on: March 14, 2015, 10:51:40 AM »
The retirees across the street who have one tell me I need a big RV instead of a tent.  They also tell me Obamacare is bankrupting them.  Couldn't be the RV, of course.

johnny847

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #25 on: March 14, 2015, 12:42:36 PM »
I "need" to go out to bars and drink. This is coming from friends who spend more on alcohol than income taxes.

Now granted, I do go out to bars and socialize with my friends. But I don't buy alcohol at a bar.

Exflyboy

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #26 on: March 14, 2015, 12:48:52 PM »
I need a way for my Wife's fabulously expensive horse to suddenly and inexplicably drop dead!

I used to spend less money on my 200mph airplane!

HappyMargo

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #27 on: March 14, 2015, 01:02:47 PM »
Aside from the sparkly diamonds that DH should be buying me :eye roll: (already mentioned up thread)

I also, apparently need a new car.  My 14 year old VW Jetta is simply not good enough to get me to/from work & hauling my dog around for destination hikes/ swims/ trail running. 
Why would I need a new car just to make it smell like wet dog too?

Janie

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #28 on: March 14, 2015, 01:33:10 PM »
On the main forum page it looks like the question is answered by your username.
"You know what you need?"
onemorebike

Would be fun, but I don't really need one.

NCGal

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #29 on: March 14, 2015, 05:11:01 PM »
Apparently I need my DH "with the job he has" to buy me "some sparkly things."   According to the source, I "deserve some diamonds."

I'm not a jewelry person & I guess coworkers are tired of seeing me wear the same pair of pearl stud earrings every day??  Expensive jewelry just makes me nervous I'll lose it, not to mention the price & add'l cost of insurance. No thanks!

DH knows me better though.  Normally we don't do gifts (prefer experiences together), but for Christmas my sweetie totally surprised me & got me a new bike! I cried over the thoughtfulness of that gift!!
Suze Orman often points out her earrings on her show. She only wears one pair which are gold-tone costume jewelry!

ryanthequark

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #30 on: March 14, 2015, 06:38:50 PM »
An air conditioner, which I've never really liked. Also, a dishwasher (I'm happy to do that by hand).

Miss Prim

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #31 on: March 15, 2015, 04:04:04 AM »
Not really someone telling me I need something, but a coworker told me she NEEDS a new car because she needs something reliable to drive to work.  I drive further than her in a car with 100,000 miles on it.  To me it is just broken in!

                                                                 Miss Prim

Drew664

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #32 on: March 15, 2015, 05:44:12 AM »
A gun and a RV. I also don't need to worry about where to store them as my FIL has graciously allowed them to be stored at his place! :)

Of course his recommendations were in jest, but probably some truth in there.

For the posrer about the minivan and 3 kids, what do you drive now?  Wife and I are looking at a minivan with planning #2, as most vehicles are cramped as is...

Krnten

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #33 on: March 15, 2015, 06:06:33 AM »
Apparently I need my DH "with the job he has" to buy me "some sparkly things."   According to the source, I "deserve some diamonds."

I'm not a jewelry person & I guess coworkers are tired of seeing me wear the same pair of pearl stud earrings every day??  Expensive jewelry just makes me nervous I'll lose it, not to mention the price & add'l cost of insurance. No thanks!

DH knows me better though.  Normally we don't do gifts (prefer experiences together), but for Christmas my sweetie totally surprised me & got me a new bike! I cried over the thoughtfulness of that gift!!
Suze Orman often points out her earrings on her show. She only wears one pair which are gold-tone costume jewelry!

Good for her!  I agree.  My jewelry rule of thumb is if it's expensive I have to be able to look at it to admire it while wearing it. Earrings and necklaces should never be expensive.  I do have a weakness for pretty rings.

justajane

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #34 on: March 15, 2015, 06:29:23 AM »
A gun and a RV. I also don't need to worry about where to store them as my FIL has graciously allowed them to be stored at his place! :)

Of course his recommendations were in jest, but probably some truth in there.

For the posrer about the minivan and 3 kids, what do you drive now?  Wife and I are looking at a minivan with planning #2, as most vehicles are cramped as is...

We have a Ford Fusion and a Kia Rondo, both of which easily fit our three kids. We're going on 10 months with three in car seats in these vehicles and no plans to upgrade to a minivan. The key is to choose your car seats wisely. In the Rondo, we can still carry my MIL in addition to the five of us.

Thegoblinchief

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #35 on: March 15, 2015, 06:41:15 AM »
A gun and a RV. I also don't need to worry about where to store them as my FIL has graciously allowed them to be stored at his place! :)

Of course his recommendations were in jest, but probably some truth in there.

For the posrer about the minivan and 3 kids, what do you drive now?  Wife and I are looking at a minivan with planning #2, as most vehicles are cramped as is...

We have a Ford Fusion and a Kia Rondo, both of which easily fit our three kids. We're going on 10 months with three in car seats in these vehicles and no plans to upgrade to a minivan. The key is to choose your car seats wisely. In the Rondo, we can still carry my MIL in addition to the five of us.

Yeah, we did 3 kids in a Subaru Outback for quite a while too. A minivan is our sole vehicle now, though, because of the extra cargo capacity when hauling project materials around and for capacity on long drives. Not a need by any stretch but minivans are arguably the most useful type of vehicle as long as you don't care about the inside getting dirty when hauling things. Ours is 15 years old so I could care less about that :P

Drew664

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #36 on: March 15, 2015, 09:17:40 AM »
Thanks

I like my space and so does the wife. I think vans carry a ton of utility and space which makes it an attractive option for us. Going to just feel around to see whats out there that may work for us.

madamwitty

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #37 on: March 15, 2015, 12:58:21 PM »
FWIW we have a 3 day rule for staying with family. After 3 days we are outta there. You'd be surprised how many fights and arguments start after 3 days with family, and how few you have if you follow this rule.
Certainly a 3-day rule (both at their house, and ours) would cut out arguments with my parents. But I just take it as a given that there will be discord during the week+ visits and roll with the punches. In my mind, the joy we get from extended visits outweighs the strife. I'm not sure if DH agrees :-)

resy

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #38 on: March 15, 2015, 07:41:12 PM »
Oh gosh. Well, lets see...
-a new car. When my old one died last summer I had ppl on fb telling me how I should just buckle down and buy a new one.
-go out to either bars, night clubs or dinners every weekend.
-go to the mall more often (I only go when Im feeling fancy to browse the books at barnes and noble while I drink a coffee)
-my sister feels/acts like my family is starving because we dont have a fridge and freeze full plus a seperate freezer (that never seems to go down btw) like they do. We are a family of 3, they of 4.
-I was a single mom for almost a decade during which I was self employed cleaning because it payed the most without a degree and the flexible schedule was great and I had people telling me all the time how I should be a bank teller so I could "dress up".
-another kid.
-get my nails/hair done (I used to and feel like such a fool for all that wasted money!)

johnny847

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #39 on: March 15, 2015, 08:51:33 PM »
Oh gosh. Well, lets see...
-a new car. When my old one died last summer I had ppl on fb telling me how I should just buckle down and buy a new one.
-go out to either bars, night clubs or dinners every weekend.
-go to the mall more often (I only go when Im feeling fancy to browse the books at barnes and noble while I drink a coffee)
-my sister feels/acts like my family is starving because we dont have a fridge and freeze full plus a seperate freezer (that never seems to go down btw) like they do. We are a family of 3, they of 4.
-I was a single mom for almost a decade during which I was self employed cleaning because it payed the most without a degree and the flexible schedule was great and I had people telling me all the time how I should be a bank teller so I could "dress up".
-another kid.
-get my nails/hair done (I used to and feel like such a fool for all that wasted money!)


Wait really? People tell you you need another kid? Everything else on your list seems like the standard consumerist fare, but I found this one to be rather nosy.

NoraLenderbee

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #40 on: March 15, 2015, 09:14:29 PM »
Quote
"You know what you need?"

onemorebike

Yup!

randymarsh

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #41 on: March 15, 2015, 09:29:47 PM »
A house.

I have zero down payment, a net worth of -$60,000, and have only lived in this state for 7 months.

Briarly

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #42 on: March 15, 2015, 11:27:00 PM »
the big one i hear about is a TV. also, a microwave.
in fact, I've been offered several free TVs by people who pity me....

Zikoris

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #43 on: March 16, 2015, 12:12:58 AM »
Strangely enough, coffee and alcohol.

I have no religious/moral issues with them or anything, I just think both of them taste like an old boot. I tell people this. They then tell me how I could gradually develop a taste for them by starting with very sweet and flavoured coffee drinks or mixed sweet alcoholic drinks. I ask how that would benefit me over my current system, where I pay a fraction of the price to buy some drink I actually enjoy (juice, soda, etc). "Oh... I guess it woudn't..."

deborah

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #44 on: March 16, 2015, 01:45:54 AM »
in fact, I've been offered several free TVs by people who pity me....
+1

I don't drink coffee or alcohol, so I understand the problems

Nickyd£g

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #45 on: March 16, 2015, 05:06:57 AM »
A new TV - the one I currently have is a big old one and the colour is blue three quarters of the screen...this seems to upset a few people
An upgraded phone - it's only 2 years old
An ipad (this, from a friend who bought a second ipad so she has one upstairs and one downstairs!)
An ipod - a guest was positively amazed I still have CDs and DVDS
A microwave
A dishwasher

Actually, a dishwasher would be nice but since I live alone and my kitchen is tiny I have neither the need nor the space.

Neustache

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #46 on: March 16, 2015, 05:40:32 AM »
When we were first married, we took the advice of some good friends and didn't have a TV.  This was unacceptable for some people.  Eventually we were given an old 19 inch by a family member who took pity on us.  I guess they all thought we couldn't afford to pay for one?  I don't know.  I do know they were totally confused how newlyweds could get by without a TV.  LOL. 

theadvicist

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #47 on: March 16, 2015, 07:27:56 AM »
Apparently I need a spa day and a fancy vacation. These would help me "just relax" which would in turn cure my infertility.

Also I need an SUV for the one child my husband and I hope to have or adopt.

I've also been told I need to join a fancy country club so I can hang out all day in the spa and relax.

I explained that that is what my house is for. I relax there for some time every day! Every detail of it is planned to give me maximum satisfaction and peace of mind. Including the fact that it was cheap, and I'm not stressing myself out trying to pay a huge mortgage, that I then have to pay the country club to help me forget about...

(PS Sorry about the infertility. People can be such idiots)

nereo

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #48 on: March 16, 2015, 09:15:19 AM »
When we got married  a few months ago there was no shortage of people telling us what we needed and should ask for via the wedding registry.
a shortened list:
decorative china (I hate owning things rarely used),
new flatware (ours is stylish, not very old, and bought on clearance.  Should last 10+ more years)
expensive decorative glass bowls.  (pretty, but useless and fragile)
'specialized' kitchen trinkets like lobster crackers, gravy-boats, brandy snifters, grapefruit spoons and other things "because it's the one time when people will buy it for you"

cashstasherat23

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Re: "You know what you need?"
« Reply #49 on: March 16, 2015, 09:46:28 AM »
Hmm..I think I have a few..

My father keeps telling me I "need" to buy more Apple stock, because it's going to take off and I'll be sorry that I didn't get in now.

Mother telling me I "need" an MBA so that I can make tons more money.

And then the assorted friends telling me I need new clothes/new accessories/expensive dinner/lots of drinks to treat myself, because I've "earned it".