Author Topic: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...  (Read 5636 times)

jeromedawg

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So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« on: June 15, 2015, 01:42:52 PM »
I'll admit, they are nice... and this is coming from a dude (Sorry guys, a recent trip to South Korea made me realize this but it's true!). And while I suppose it might also help reduce use of toilet paper, it seems more like a luxury [that my wife and I definitely don't need] than anything. Before our monthly visit to my in-laws, my wife was randomly checking their Mint account (yes, she kind of watches their budget and spending when she can because of all the times they've asked her to help with late fees, overdrafts, etc) and noticed a $700 check written to some random dude. When she asked my MIL about it, all she said was "Oh we got you guys a gift and I think your husband will *really* like it! It's a surprise!"

Uh ohs...

Fast-forward to this weekend. We get to their house and my wife tells me to go look in my in-laws' bathroom. There I find a glorious bidet toilet seat. It's even heated! Then it all came to me: they bought one for themselves and bought one for us... Apparently the deal was this: buy and refer or buy 2 more, and get a free fancy rice cooker. They got one for themselves, one for us, and referred one of their restaurant employees to get the rice cooker. So her mom tells her "you just tell us when you want to have it installed at your house and we'll schedule it. Oh and you should take this free rice cooker that came with it too. It's much better than the one you have at your house" (except, when I checked on Amazon someone posted a poor review of it with pictures showing the bottom of the pot all burnt...)

My wife was pretty irate, and so was her brother, who was visiting for the weekend. I almost couldn't believe it myself. Then I was reminded that her parents are probably some of the most impulsive people I know. In any case, I realized this bidet requires an electrical outlet, and unless you want to run an extension cord over to the nearest one, you'll need to have some electric work done in the bathroom. Ok, not a *huge* deal but still more work than I would want to do for a bidet toilet seat....especially if the guy selling/installing it potentially isn't going to do that work or charge extra for it.  Sorry in-laws, ain't gonna happen. We felt bad because I think her mom really wanted to help and was even coming up with reasons like "Oh I thought it would be good for you [my wife] after you give birth, etc. I just want you to be comfortable" If all they wanted to do was help though they should have either asked us what we need or may as well have just given us that $700... they kept talking/arguing about it for a while and that's when my wife and BIL realized that it sounded more like an impulsive buy for themselves with the intention of helping my wife on the side. Apparently, all their friends have this thing and the guy selling it to all these people is also a "friend" - they basically got suckered into an Asian-based selling/referral ring with all their friends... kind of like QVC but referral-based.

We asked if they can return it but it looks like they signed a contract or something in blood; or maybe it was when the scamme...err...friend cashed the check: *NO REFUNDS!* So I guess they're going to try to convince one of their other friends that they absolutely need something like this to recoup the $700 they just put down. My wife just feels so bad and conflicted about it - I mean, you can tell her all you want that it was their decision and they should live with the consequences etc etc etc but it's hard to write it off when they're your family and had nothing but good intentions. Although, as mentioned already, we sort of question their primary intentions of getting this.

My wife always gets stressed out with her parents because of stuff like this. In this case, they acted on their impulses and were also taken advantage of IMHO. Consumerism at its finest. On a lighter and perhaps more 'mustachian' note, her dad is DIY-building a chicken coop/rabbit pen combo in their backyard.... and although that seemed kind of impulsive as well, it's probably much cheaper (not to mention more exciting) than the bidet toilet seat. My wife wasn't too thrilled about either one though.
« Last Edit: June 15, 2015, 01:51:56 PM by jplee3 »

Ground Karate Monkey

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #1 on: June 15, 2015, 02:11:03 PM »
Silly, the fancy ones tend to break after a year.  The basic $30-40 dollar ones off of Amazon work great, don't reqire an outlet, and last much longer.

jeromedawg

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #2 on: June 15, 2015, 02:15:29 PM »
Silly, the fancy ones tend to break after a year.  The basic $30-40 dollar ones off of Amazon work great, don't reqire an outlet, and last much longer.

Yea, I saw the ones on Amazon for much less. Was even tempted to get one but decided not to. Go figure on the fancier ones not lasting very long. I anticipate that's what will happen with theirs and they'll just leave it broken on the toilet. Either that or finally have the sense to remove it and get rid of it. Either way, that's a crazy amount of money to spend on something like this!

GizmoTX

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #3 on: June 15, 2015, 02:15:58 PM »
If this is a Toto unit, ours has been working very well for 8 years with no problems. I would get it again.

jeromedawg

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #4 on: June 15, 2015, 02:23:56 PM »
If this is a Toto unit, ours has been working very well for 8 years with no problems. I would get it again.

No it's made by Coway (Korean company). I hear good things about the Toto brand in general; expensive but well-worth it for the long-haul

merula

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #5 on: June 15, 2015, 02:35:54 PM »
Ok, so, a few points. First, I'm very sorry you're dealing with impulsive in-laws, but at least you recognize that. I just realized recently that the primary motivator of mine is alway impluse, and it's made dealing with them easier.

The cost of the bidet is sunk; there's no way to recoup it and it wasn't your cost, so I would try to let that go. I would also call an electrician and ask about the wiring thing. Bathrooms tend to be pretty small, there's probably not too much that needs to be done to get what you need. It might even work out to pay for itself considering TP savings.

And it would really help a post-partum woman, speaking from experience. I was sent home from the hospital with what was essentially a medical-grade squirt bottle, and more than once I had to weigh the need to go versus the need to wait for warm water to fill said squirt bottle.

jeromedawg

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #6 on: June 15, 2015, 02:59:02 PM »
Ok, so, a few points. First, I'm very sorry you're dealing with impulsive in-laws, but at least you recognize that. I just realized recently that the primary motivator of mine is alway impluse, and it's made dealing with them easier.

The cost of the bidet is sunk; there's no way to recoup it and it wasn't your cost, so I would try to let that go. I would also call an electrician and ask about the wiring thing. Bathrooms tend to be pretty small, there's probably not too much that needs to be done to get what you need. It might even work out to pay for itself considering TP savings.

And it would really help a post-partum woman, speaking from experience. I was sent home from the hospital with what was essentially a medical-grade squirt bottle, and more than once I had to weigh the need to go versus the need to wait for warm water to fill said squirt bottle.

We'd rather our in-laws recoup that money themselves by basically convincing one of their other friends to buy what *would* have been our installation (with the enticement of a free rice cooker as well LOL). This probably isn't going to be too hard either, considering how this all went down to begin with. As mentioned previously too, there are bidets you can order off Amazon and for much less. So if my wife decides that it is going to be something good for her to have, then I think we'll just get it from Amazon.
« Last Edit: June 15, 2015, 03:02:46 PM by jplee3 »

MgoSam

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #7 on: June 15, 2015, 03:05:40 PM »
A family friend has one in the master bedroom (my parents' friends). A bunch of kids were hanging out in the bedroom during a party because it was the only place we could watch the football game (I was 13 at the time and most people were around that age). One of the guys went to the bathroom and came back with water all over his shirt and face and said, "Hey man, your faucet is weird." Turns out he tried to wash his hands with the bidet. Good laugh, I always thought this guy wasn't that bright, but he proved me wrong.....he just got his MBA from Harvard and is engaged to my cousin.

4alpacas

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #8 on: June 15, 2015, 03:08:05 PM »
I understand your annoyance because of your in-laws impulse purchasing.  However, we love our seat.

If this is a Toto unit, ours has been working very well for 8 years with no problems. I would get it again.
We have a Toto and love it.  It's going strong after 3 moves.  He installed it every time.  The first two loacations were apartments, so he fastened a heavy duty extension cord (white to match the walls) around the mirror. 


MgoSam

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #9 on: June 15, 2015, 03:11:09 PM »
Forgive my ignorance, but what is the difference between different types of toilets?

jeromedawg

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #10 on: June 15, 2015, 03:15:08 PM »
Forgive my ignorance, but what is the difference between different types of toilets?

For the toilets themselves, it's primarily a few things at least: shape of the toilet/seat, size(height and depth usually) of the toilet, and then GPF (gallons per flush in accordance, or not, with low-flow toilets). I learned about toilet size the hard way when I was replacing toilets in my condo and went out and bought whatever was a good deal. After attempting to install it and finding that it was too high and also too deep from the wall (in terms of where the drain was located), I ended up having to exchange it for a smaller model. The smaller one installed no problem. Fortunately as well, the toilet replacements were fully covered by rebates from my local water district so it was free... besides gas and time :)

On the subject of the bidet, I looked up reviews for the model they got on Amazon and there's one where the reviewer states it broke down after 14months and customer service was non-existant. There are also some Toto model bidet seats out there that cost less or the same as this one by Coway and I bet customer service is much better.
« Last Edit: June 15, 2015, 03:18:57 PM by jplee3 »

jeromedawg

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #11 on: June 15, 2015, 09:39:16 PM »
My MIL is really trying hard to convince and push us to take it.... I think she just wants an easy-out for the impulse buy they made. I'm not happy about the though of having to run another outlet in there. Ugh, such a hassle. Plus, it's not really a "gift" by virtue of why they even bought it. We're planning to tell them to take 3-4 weeks and try to get someone else to buy and if not we may just take it...

BlueHouse

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #12 on: June 19, 2015, 03:10:28 PM »
I understand your annoyance because of your in-laws impulse purchasing.  However, we love our seat.

If this is a Toto unit, ours has been working very well for 8 years with no problems. I would get it again.
We have a Toto and love it.  It's going strong after 3 moves.  He installed it every time.  The first two loacations were apartments, so he fastened a heavy duty extension cord (white to match the walls) around the mirror.
I have the toto seat too. Going strong after three years and I love it. If I had to pay $800 a year for this, I would, but they're well made so I don't have to. I turn the seat heat down in the summer.

4alpacas

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #13 on: June 19, 2015, 03:17:16 PM »
I understand your annoyance because of your in-laws impulse purchasing.  However, we love our seat.

If this is a Toto unit, ours has been working very well for 8 years with no problems. I would get it again.
We have a Toto and love it.  It's going strong after 3 moves.  He installed it every time.  The first two loacations were apartments, so he fastened a heavy duty extension cord (white to match the walls) around the mirror.
I have the toto seat too. Going strong after three years and I love it. If I had to pay $800 a year for this, I would, but they're well made so I don't have to. I turn the seat heat down in the summer.
We turn the warmer off in the summer, but it's an awesome feature in the winter.  Last winter, we didn't turn the heat on in our house, so it was awesome to sit down on a warm seat.

jeromedawg

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #14 on: June 22, 2015, 10:13:31 AM »
Well, my wife finally convinced my MIL to sucker one of her other friends into the deal. So we're relieved we don't have to deal with another gadget (or two actually, cause of the rice cooker) that may end up breaking after a year, and becoming useless because of nonexistent customer support (read a negative review of the product on Amazon where all this basically happened). Her mom was pretty upset at her and was like "fine, we're never going to buy you anything again. And don't ever ask us" - OMG, this is exactly what we've wanted from them! A) not to buy us stuff and B) save their money because they barely have any. It was just a really poor decision on their part, and we were basically just telling them, in other words, that we don't want to reap the effects of this bad decision. We already have a lot more important things to think about for ourselves and also for them once they're incapable of caring for themselves. I know they wanted to gift this to us, but this is absolutely something my wife and I could *not* accept, as silly as it sounds.

I have a feeling we're going to see more Korean gadgetry and gizmos regardless... especially once the baby arrives. I think this was a battle worth fighting though - we really didn't want to deal with having someone come over to install this thing. If we really need a bidet, I know exactly which one to get off Amazon or Ebay (Luxe Bidet 180). Don't need a seat warmer (we're in SoCal) and don't need a remote control.
« Last Edit: June 22, 2015, 10:16:08 AM by jplee3 »

4alpacas

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #15 on: June 22, 2015, 10:25:35 AM »
Don't need a seat warmer (we're in SoCal) and don't need a remote control.
No one needs a remote control...but...

I'm glad it worked out with your in-laws.  Good luck with fending off future gadgets.  We've been able to stop the creep of stuff because we live in such a small space. 

tj

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Re: So my in-laws pre-purchased a bidet toilet seat for us...
« Reply #16 on: June 27, 2015, 04:30:57 PM »
Don't need a seat warmer (we're in SoCal) and don't need a remote control.
No one needs a remote control...but...

I'm glad it worked out with your in-laws.  Good luck with fending off future gadgets.  We've been able to stop the creep of stuff because we live in such a small space.

Chucking the remote control seems a bit excessive. I couldnt find the Uverse remote at a girl's place to I had to manually go up and down 1000s of channels one at ta time. no thanks.