Learned this weekend from a relative: apparently wedding loans are <a thing people do>. (???????)
As in: 'my in-laws expect a style of wedding that runs +/- 60K, and are putting up 40K of that, so I'm going to take out a 20K loan because, since proposing a year and a half ago, we haven't been able to put aside any money in anticipation of this blessed event'. No word on how you're planning on paying off the 20K loan (that's roughly 50% of your take-home pay as a couple, mind - here's hoping your wedding guests are real generous, I guess?), and no hint of changing how you're celebrating said event to match the available 40K.
... no wonder they want cash presents.
(To be clear: their money, their life, their problems, their choices, and they're not whining to me or making it my business, so not really my business and I'm not actively judging - sometimes we all make iffy financial decisions because the finances are secondary to the relationships you're preserving, so, fine. I just can't imaging voluntarily digging a hole that big without a clear plan to dig a way back out, and it's scary to look at from the outside.)