Author Topic: Overheard on Facebook  (Read 3215632 times)

I'm a red panda

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7800 on: October 30, 2018, 09:25:00 AM »

I asked a Muslim guy this once. He said tattoos were frowned upon because they were changing what God created.

Isn't this technically the Christian stance too? I mean Leviticus clearly says no tattoos, though it doesn't say why.

I mean, for most Christian sects the Pentateuch and the entire OT is generally seen as non-binding because Christians are bound by the New Covenant from the last supper, and not the laws of the OT.  Otherwise christians would keep kosher, etc.  But I guess you could look at 1 Corinthians and get "no tattoos" out of 6:19's language about your body being a temple.

Even for Jews/OT adherents I think there is an argument Leviticus was talking about Canaanite ritual scarification and not tattoos if you read Kings.

Yeah, Leviticus only matters when it's about the gays.

ixtap

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7801 on: October 30, 2018, 01:36:16 PM »

I asked a Muslim guy this once. He said tattoos were frowned upon because they were changing what God created.

Isn't this technically the Christian stance too? I mean Leviticus clearly says no tattoos, though it doesn't say why.


Well, Jesus did say that the old laws weren't really that important. Love thy enemy, do unto others, and turn the other cheek, rather than eye for an eye and kill every last one, leave no woman or child to seek revenge.
I mean, for most Christian sects the Pentateuch and the entire OT is generally seen as non-binding because Christians are bound by the New Covenant from the last supper, and not the laws of the OT.  Otherwise christians would keep kosher, etc.  But I guess you could look at 1 Corinthians and get "no tattoos" out of 6:19's language about your body being a temple.

Even for Jews/OT adherents I think there is an argument Leviticus was talking about Canaanite ritual scarification and not tattoos if you read Kings.

Yeah, Leviticus only matters when it's about the gays.

JAYSLOL

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7802 on: October 30, 2018, 08:40:04 PM »
Ugh!  I can't take it anymore!  The former high school classmate Facebook friend of mine that has spent the last 2 years posting about how they really need to win the lottery to have any chance of paying off debts while posting photos of a brand new big screen tv and new huge dodge truck and complaining about their "loan place"(payday loans), and not making ends meet just posted that they crashed their SO's car and posted a photo of a brand new jeep SUV as the replacement.  I just don't understand how people can be so wrapped up in consumerism that they can completely destroy their own future for that new car smell today. 

MgoSam

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7803 on: October 31, 2018, 01:08:14 PM »

I asked a Muslim guy this once. He said tattoos were frowned upon because they were changing what God created.

Isn't this technically the Christian stance too? I mean Leviticus clearly says no tattoos, though it doesn't say why.

I mean, for most Christian sects the Pentateuch and the entire OT is generally seen as non-binding because Christians are bound by the New Covenant from the last supper, and not the laws of the OT.  Otherwise christians would keep kosher, etc.  But I guess you could look at 1 Corinthians and get "no tattoos" out of 6:19's language about your body being a temple.

Even for Jews/OT adherents I think there is an argument Leviticus was talking about Canaanite ritual scarification and not tattoos if you read Kings.

Yeah, Leviticus only matters when it's about the gays.

I brought this up the last time I heard a Christian friend talking about the evils of homosexuality. He quickly changed the subject. The guy was eating pork at the time.....

onlykelsey

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7804 on: October 31, 2018, 01:22:18 PM »

I asked a Muslim guy this once. He said tattoos were frowned upon because they were changing what God created.

Isn't this technically the Christian stance too? I mean Leviticus clearly says no tattoos, though it doesn't say why.

I mean, for most Christian sects the Pentateuch and the entire OT is generally seen as non-binding because Christians are bound by the New Covenant from the last supper, and not the laws of the OT.  Otherwise christians would keep kosher, etc.  But I guess you could look at 1 Corinthians and get "no tattoos" out of 6:19's language about your body being a temple.

Even for Jews/OT adherents I think there is an argument Leviticus was talking about Canaanite ritual scarification and not tattoos if you read Kings.

Yeah, Leviticus only matters when it's about the gays.

I brought this up the last time I heard a Christian friend talking about the evils of homosexuality. He quickly changed the subject. The guy was eating pork at the time.....
Paul does talk about homosexuality, but it's the ONLY gospel to do so... and in the context of him trying to find common ground with Romans (hey, we hate them, too!)... not super compelling.  The whole point of christianity is the new covenant.... not appending belief in Jesus on to Judaism (see, e.g. Mike Pence inviting a "Messianic Jew" to lead the prayer services yesterday).

shelivesthedream

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7805 on: October 31, 2018, 01:49:36 PM »
Hey, has anyone overheard anything good on Facebook lately? [/end hint]

I'm a red panda

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7806 on: October 31, 2018, 02:13:11 PM »
Hey, has anyone overheard anything good on Facebook lately? [/end hint]

If you want, I can find a post about how the Bible says gays are bad.  Or at least how Steve King says they are.  Dumbshit Steve King is taking up way too much of my facebook feed.

mustachepungoeshere

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7807 on: November 04, 2018, 04:57:34 PM »
Hey, has anyone overheard anything good on Facebook lately? [/end hint]

A reasonably frugal friend was in the US for work recently.

He visited an outlet mall to pick up new running shoes for about half the price he would pay in Australia.

A colleague he was travelling with had a go at him for "wasting money on shoes".

The colleague is a pack of day smoker who pays more than a dollar each for every cigarette.
« Last Edit: November 04, 2018, 09:23:05 PM by mustachepungoeshere »

dragoncar

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7808 on: November 04, 2018, 08:42:37 PM »
Hey, has anyone overheard anything good on Facebook lately? [/end hint]

A reasonably frugal friend was in the US for work recently.

He visited an outlet mall to pick up new running shoes for about half the price he would pay in Australia.

A colleague he was travelling with started had a go at him for "wasting money on shoes".

The colleague is a pack of day smoker who pays more than a dollar each for every cigarette.

You donít get shoe withdrawal if you donít buy more shoes

Kitsune

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7809 on: November 05, 2018, 07:10:10 AM »
Hey, has anyone overheard anything good on Facebook lately? [/end hint]

A reasonably frugal friend was in the US for work recently.

He visited an outlet mall to pick up new running shoes for about half the price he would pay in Australia.

A colleague he was travelling with started had a go at him for "wasting money on shoes".

The colleague is a pack of day smoker who pays more than a dollar each for every cigarette.

You donít get shoe withdrawal if you donít buy more shoes

Really? Looking at some of my colleagues, you'd certainly think otherwise.

Sugaree

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7810 on: November 05, 2018, 09:28:23 AM »
Hey, has anyone overheard anything good on Facebook lately? [/end hint]

A reasonably frugal friend was in the US for work recently.

He visited an outlet mall to pick up new running shoes for about half the price he would pay in Australia.

A colleague he was travelling with started had a go at him for "wasting money on shoes".

The colleague is a pack of day smoker who pays more than a dollar each for every cigarette.

You donít get shoe withdrawal if you donít buy more shoes

Really? Looking at some of my colleagues, you'd certainly think otherwise.

Me too.  And the worst offender is one of the guys.  I swear he has a pair of sneakers to match every single t-shirt he owns.  And I'm over here wearing 15 year-old Doc Martens with holes in them because I can't find new ones that I like for a price I want to pay (okay, and they are broken in and comfy). 

marty998

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7811 on: November 05, 2018, 11:31:16 PM »
Hey, has anyone overheard anything good on Facebook lately? [/end hint]

A reasonably frugal friend was in the US for work recently.

He visited an outlet mall to pick up new running shoes for about half the price he would pay in Australia.

A colleague he was travelling with started had a go at him for "wasting money on shoes".

The colleague is a pack of day smoker who pays more than a dollar each for every cigarette.

You donít get shoe withdrawal if you donít buy more shoes

Really? Looking at some of my colleagues, you'd certainly think otherwise.

Me too.  And the worst offender is one of the guys.  I swear he has a pair of sneakers to match every single t-shirt he owns.  And I'm over here wearing 15 year-old Doc Martens with holes in them because I can't find new ones that I like for a price I want to pay (okay, and they are broken in and comfy).

Ok I will stretch a pair for as long as I can, but even I know (from experience) that old worn out shoes lead to blisters and foot problems pretty quickly.

Bite the bullet and get a new pair. Will save you much more in podiatry costs down the road.

ysette9

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7812 on: November 06, 2018, 09:37:22 AM »
I just got another FB friend invite from my FIL. I searched for his name and found six accounts he has opened up over time.
It appears that he forgets his password or otherwise gets messed up and so instead of figuring it out or asking for help, he just opens a new account.

marcela

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7813 on: November 06, 2018, 10:19:51 AM »
I just got another FB friend invite from my FIL. I searched for his name and found six accounts he has opened up over time.
It appears that he forgets his password or otherwise gets messed up and so instead of figuring it out or asking for help, he just opens a new account.
My MIL is the same. I have 4 accounts that are all her, but she ups the game by using a different name every time. So frustrating.

Sugaree

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7814 on: November 07, 2018, 11:23:46 AM »
This just came up on a community based page that I'm a part of on FB:

"I need info about homeschool .
I'm wonting to take my child out of public school .any parents on here willing to tell me how I go about doing it. .
All info is appreciated."

letsdoit

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7815 on: November 07, 2018, 11:35:31 AM »


What finally got me to post here is that in recent months the moocher has apparently been "bitten by the travel bug" and is on his third trip by PLANE this year.  His trips are of course well documented with selfies and memes about the Joy of Travel.  This has apparently made his money situation particularly desperate so he has gone from subtle asks for money ("woe is me I'm so poor how will I eat" quickly followed by "it sure would be nice if a pizza magically appeared on my doorstep."  I wish I was joking.) to not-so-subtle asks.  I mean directly saying "give me money, any money, even a dollar will do" in increasingly creative ways ranging from cutesy to straight up begging.  The frequency of these posts is directly proportional to the frequency of his travel posts and how excited he is to "go off on his next adventure."  Today's post was what pushed me over the edge:  Directions on how to give directly to his paypal because he doesn't know how he'll pay rent (again, that poor roommate) the same day as posting that he bought yet another plane ticket.

We have a lady like that at our mosque, she is always complaining about how she is hungry, how she has no food in the house, etc. She has repeatedly stated that she has government disability payments monthly but is frequently posting on FB about how she has bought new art supplies or she has gotten a new tattoo. Now, I live a good ways from the mosque, about 1/2 hour on public transport. I live very near to the only pay-what-you-can grocery in Canada.  Offered to take her there, since I had to go home anyway.  She refused, saying, ę Thanks, that would be nice but then I would have to cook the food Ľ. I just said, ę okay, let me know if you ever need a ride over there. Salaam aleikum Ľ and then left.  Iíve been told that other people have given her food many times but I canít see that as helpful or sustainable.

i have to admit once i cooked a bowl of plain white rice and offered it to a guy that was always bitching about how hungry he was.  i was young, maybe it was uncooth, but i used to eat a lot of plain rice so i know he wasnt really hungry bc he rejected it

letsdoit

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7816 on: November 07, 2018, 11:45:32 AM »
I just booted up my new iPhone 8 that I got because my employer gave it to me for free. I had previously planned on using my iPhone 6 until screen and battery replacements were no longer sufficient to keep it going. I have to say, I wouldnít buy this new phone myself but I am enjoying all of its fancy fancy. :) Here is hoping the phone will take me to FIRE!

someone gave me an iphone 5 when my burner phoen died.
and the iphone sucks ,  doesnt receive calls or anything. 
i guess i can get this moto g6 and maye a SIM adapter and put the iphoen's SIM card in it with no problem  ?

SugarMountain

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7817 on: November 07, 2018, 12:43:47 PM »
I just got another FB friend invite from my FIL. I searched for his name and found six accounts he has opened up over time.
It appears that he forgets his password or otherwise gets messed up and so instead of figuring it out or asking for help, he just opens a new account.

Those could be scam accounts.  There is a scam where the scammer opens an account with your name, your profile picture, and starts sending friends requests to your existing friends list. This happened to me once and I've since made my friends list private (by default it's public).

https://www.webopedia.com/TERM/F/facebook-clone-scam.html

ysette9

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7818 on: November 07, 2018, 12:46:41 PM »
I think that is a question for Google, not for me. :)

ysette9

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7819 on: November 07, 2018, 12:54:35 PM »
I just got another FB friend invite from my FIL. I searched for his name and found six accounts he has opened up over time.
It appears that he forgets his password or otherwise gets messed up and so instead of figuring it out or asking for help, he just opens a new account.

Those could be scam accounts.  There is a scam where the scammer opens an account with your name, your profile picture, and starts sending friends requests to your existing friends list. This happened to me once and I've since made my friends list private (by default it's public).

https://www.webopedia.com/TERM/F/facebook-clone-scam.html
I am pretty sure he just doesn’t know how to operate technology. A new account gets opened every few months and he posts the same photos to several of them. It is like he is logged into one FB account on the phone, another on the iPad, and a third on the computer....

Just Joe

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7820 on: November 13, 2018, 07:47:07 AM »
I just got another FB friend invite from my FIL. I searched for his name and found six accounts he has opened up over time.
It appears that he forgets his password or otherwise gets messed up and so instead of figuring it out or asking for help, he just opens a new account.
My MIL is the same. I have 4 accounts that are all her, but she ups the game by using a different name every time. So frustrating.

We have a relative that asks their grown kids and grandkids for IT support. Everyone has varying skill levels. DW does IT support as part of her job.

DW will find abandoned accounts, passwords nobody wrote down, click here solutions and no awareness of what software or app they are using to "see the pictures" (social media). Even recovering passwords by email can be an adventure.

Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Alfred J Quack

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7821 on: November 14, 2018, 10:22:19 AM »
I just got another FB friend invite from my FIL. I searched for his name and found six accounts he has opened up over time.
It appears that he forgets his password or otherwise gets messed up and so instead of figuring it out or asking for help, he just opens a new account.
My MIL is the same. I have 4 accounts that are all her, but she ups the game by using a different name every time. So frustrating.

We have a relative that asks their grown kids and grandkids for IT support. Everyone has varying skill levels. DW does IT support as part of her job.

DW will find abandoned accounts, passwords nobody wrote down, click here solutions and no awareness of what software or app they are using to "see the pictures" (social media). Even recovering passwords by email can be an adventure.

Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Last time I helped someone was when a colleague asked me to help with his audio system because it could be linked to his TV control (that was an interesting new concept at the time). I helped, he payed barely enough to cover my travel expenses and appearently told his manager that I'd help out if he payed me. So next thing I know is the manager asking me to help him for a few Ä, I refused.

After that I realized that everyone wants to sit up front for pennies and that if they really wanted my help they should pay my hourly tariff based on my experience and knowledge (50Ä before tax). I used to get a reply that their nephew or some such was a lot cheaper and could do it too - so why not ask the nephew in stead of asking me! Eventually the requests stopped.

I have done a few charity cases in the meantime but it usually bit me in the backside so now you pay full deterrent price (75Ä :P) or no support, period. It also helps to give a sob story about the family situation which everyone knows about anyway to emphasyze my point - my time is more valuable than your money.

MishMash

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7822 on: November 14, 2018, 02:10:17 PM »


What finally got me to post here is that in recent months the moocher has apparently been "bitten by the travel bug" and is on his third trip by PLANE this year.  His trips are of course well documented with selfies and memes about the Joy of Travel.  This has apparently made his money situation particularly desperate so he has gone from subtle asks for money ("woe is me I'm so poor how will I eat" quickly followed by "it sure would be nice if a pizza magically appeared on my doorstep."  I wish I was joking.) to not-so-subtle asks.  I mean directly saying "give me money, any money, even a dollar will do" in increasingly creative ways ranging from cutesy to straight up begging.  The frequency of these posts is directly proportional to the frequency of his travel posts and how excited he is to "go off on his next adventure."  Today's post was what pushed me over the edge:  Directions on how to give directly to his paypal because he doesn't know how he'll pay rent (again, that poor roommate) the same day as posting that he bought yet another plane ticket.

We have a lady like that at our mosque, she is always complaining about how she is hungry, how she has no food in the house, etc. She has repeatedly stated that she has government disability payments monthly but is frequently posting on FB about how she has bought new art supplies or she has gotten a new tattoo. Now, I live a good ways from the mosque, about 1/2 hour on public transport. I live very near to the only pay-what-you-can grocery in Canada.  Offered to take her there, since I had to go home anyway.  She refused, saying, ę Thanks, that would be nice but then I would have to cook the food Ľ. I just said, ę okay, let me know if you ever need a ride over there. Salaam aleikum Ľ and then left.  Iíve been told that other people have given her food many times but I canít see that as helpful or sustainable.

i have to admit once i cooked a bowl of plain white rice and offered it to a guy that was always bitching about how hungry he was.  i was young, maybe it was uncooth, but i used to eat a lot of plain rice so i know he wasnt really hungry bc he rejected it

Yea I have a FB friend like this...she used to be HORRIBLE (she's earlier in the thread with some of the stories).  Then she got better for a while, but has recently re started, and now it's rent, food, AND booze and weed that she is begging for.

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7823 on: November 14, 2018, 04:15:09 PM »


What finally got me to post here is that in recent months the moocher has apparently been "bitten by the travel bug" and is on his third trip by PLANE this year.  His trips are of course well documented with selfies and memes about the Joy of Travel.  This has apparently made his money situation particularly desperate so he has gone from subtle asks for money ("woe is me I'm so poor how will I eat" quickly followed by "it sure would be nice if a pizza magically appeared on my doorstep."  I wish I was joking.) to not-so-subtle asks.  I mean directly saying "give me money, any money, even a dollar will do" in increasingly creative ways ranging from cutesy to straight up begging.  The frequency of these posts is directly proportional to the frequency of his travel posts and how excited he is to "go off on his next adventure."  Today's post was what pushed me over the edge:  Directions on how to give directly to his paypal because he doesn't know how he'll pay rent (again, that poor roommate) the same day as posting that he bought yet another plane ticket.

We have a lady like that at our mosque, she is always complaining about how she is hungry, how she has no food in the house, etc. She has repeatedly stated that she has government disability payments monthly but is frequently posting on FB about how she has bought new art supplies or she has gotten a new tattoo. Now, I live a good ways from the mosque, about 1/2 hour on public transport. I live very near to the only pay-what-you-can grocery in Canada.  Offered to take her there, since I had to go home anyway.  She refused, saying, ę Thanks, that would be nice but then I would have to cook the food Ľ. I just said, ę okay, let me know if you ever need a ride over there. Salaam aleikum Ľ and then left.  Iíve been told that other people have given her food many times but I canít see that as helpful or sustainable.

i have to admit once i cooked a bowl of plain white rice and offered it to a guy that was always bitching about how hungry he was.  i was young, maybe it was uncooth, but i used to eat a lot of plain rice so i know he wasnt really hungry bc he rejected it

Yea I have a FB friend like this...she used to be HORRIBLE (she's earlier in the thread with some of the stories).  Then she got better for a while, but has recently re started, and now it's rent, food, AND booze and weed that she is begging for.

Don't tell me that Madame Bovary burned through yet another meal ticket, and is looking for a new codependent KISSASS?

Goldielocks

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7824 on: November 14, 2018, 04:37:08 PM »

i have to admit once i cooked a bowl of plain white rice and offered it to a guy that was always bitching about how hungry he was.  i was young, maybe it was uncooth, but i used to eat a lot of plain rice so i know he wasnt really hungry bc he rejected it

I did something similar.  I helped a family who recently moved here from another country to get out of a horrible living situation (the 5 of them were staying with a relative and the hosting family's patience had obviously run out about 3 months prior).   What I did was help to find household donations for them, picked it all up, moved it all into their new basement suite, helped them fill out paperwork that they needed to stay in the country, offered to walk them from the bus stop to their lawyer's because they (she) was nervous about getting there without a car, etc.

After moving the second load of donations into their place, she said that they did not have any food and was worried.  She had refused to have me bring her to sign up at the food back previously.   I was a bit puzzled because obviously the family / relations that they moved away from were well enough off, and should have been very thankful that they were now in their own place, so I know I would have easily bought them some groceries... but maybe not.  Not my place to pry.

So, I went home, looked at my own cupboard, and packaged up some of the sweet potatoes, some onions, potatoes, 1/2 gallon of cooking oil, a lb of carrots, a handful of apples, oatmeal, and a few pounds of rice, dried chickpeas and some beans.   Most of this from my own personal "super size bulk" supplies, which is so much cheaper to get but needs ready cash when you do.  I added in salt, a bit of spices (whatever I had in bulk),  a lb of sugar and some cheap tea bags that I was not using up very quickly.

And I dropped it off.   There were smiles, a bit of puzzled look, and a thank-you.

And I was never asked by them again for food "donations" although I know many others in the community were repeatedly asked.

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7825 on: November 14, 2018, 05:22:30 PM »

Just Joe

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7826 on: November 15, 2018, 07:47:09 AM »
Last time I helped someone was when a colleague asked me to help with his audio system because it could be linked to his TV control (that was an interesting new concept at the time). I helped, he payed barely enough to cover my travel expenses and appearently told his manager that I'd help out if he payed me. So next thing I know is the manager asking me to help him for a few Ä, I refused.

After that I realized that everyone wants to sit up front for pennies and that if they really wanted my help they should pay my hourly tariff based on my experience and knowledge (50Ä before tax). I used to get a reply that their nephew or some such was a lot cheaper and could do it too - so why not ask the nephew in stead of asking me! Eventually the requests stopped.

I have done a few charity cases in the meantime but it usually bit me in the backside so now you pay full deterrent price (75Ä :P) or no support, period. It also helps to give a sob story about the family situation which everyone knows about anyway to emphasyze my point - my time is more valuable than your money.

That's what YouTube and Google is for. A colleague had a printer problem recently. All he knew was that he had a printer, nothing else. After we established the details and I sent him three YT links. Tada!!!

I am a big fan of "teaching a man to fish" but sometimes it feels like I'm doing someone's homework for them. ;)

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7827 on: November 15, 2018, 10:56:01 AM »
<snipped a food charity story>

And I dropped it off.   There were smiles, a bit of puzzled look, and a thank-you.

And I was never asked by them again for food "donations" although I know many others in the community were repeatedly asked.

Food culture is interesting. People seem to have a preference for eating what they grew up with and what they know how to prepare. One person's staple might be inedible to someone else from a different culture who doesn't know how to prepare it, and it's not entirely a global thing.

There are also people who truly do not know how to cook. One of my tenants had to be taught how to make spaghetti or soup for himself using pre-packaged options. He'd always lived with other family members who had done the cooking and who had discouraged him from so much as stepping into the kitchen. If someone were to have handed this fellow a potato or some dried beans, he'd have been verbally polite but with the same deer-in-the-headlights response you described.

A person living in a house who does not contribute by performing basic household operations such as cooking wears out his or her welcome pretty quickly. You described a family of five.

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7828 on: November 15, 2018, 11:37:47 AM »
<snipped a food charity story>

And I dropped it off.   There were smiles, a bit of puzzled look, and a thank-you.

And I was never asked by them again for food "donations" although I know many others in the community were repeatedly asked.

Food culture is interesting. People seem to have a preference for eating what they grew up with and what they know how to prepare. One person's staple might be inedible to someone else from a different culture who doesn't know how to prepare it, and it's not entirely a global thing.


Agree, I tutor at a refugee center, and even when the most basic food (like eggs or corn) are set out in the share basket, we always put instructions on what you can do with it, beyond just a recipe.

Imma

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7829 on: November 15, 2018, 02:59:18 PM »


There are also people who truly do not know how to cook. One of my tenants had to be taught how to make spaghetti or soup for himself using pre-packaged options. He'd always lived with other family members who had done the cooking and who had discouraged him from so much as stepping into the kitchen. If someone were to have handed this fellow a potato or some dried beans, he'd have been verbally polite but with the same deer-in-the-headlights response you described.


Due to circumstances, a grown-up man aged 50 in my family suddenly has no one to cook for him anymore, and won't for another two months.

He has been calling relatives in desperation for money to pay ffood because he couldn't afford eating out every day and he has been hungry for a while. His siblings didn't want to give him money, understandably (due to other circumstances this guy never has money although he has a good income, a cheap home and no dependants - there's more to this story of course) but if he made a shopping list, they'd drop off a couple of bags of groceries. He absolutely had no idea what to put on a grocery shopping list, because he's never cooked for himself and apparantly rarely even shops for groceries himself. Seems he's been living on bread and canned hotdogs for a few weeks now.

There's a lot more to this story and I don't feel a lot of sympathy for this guy, but it's sad that a grown man can't even imagine going to the grocery store and picking up canned soup, microwave meals or frozen pizza. These days you can even buy meal kits with seasoned meat, chopped up vegetables and fresh noodles that you just have to stir fry for a few minutes. I'm sure there are youtube tutorials about boiling and frying eggs. But this grown-up man sincerely can't feed himself and he's not accepting any help from anyone.

AMandM

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7830 on: November 15, 2018, 05:04:17 PM »

A 'potato', oh interesting. Never heard of a potato, looks pretty good.

You laugh, but Caitlyn Flanagan once wrote in the Atlantic of going to a friend's house as a child. The friend and her mother were in the kitchen, doing something with brown lumps and knives. "What are you doing?" asked Caitlyn.  "Uh... we're making mashed potatoes," was the reply.  She was incredulous, because she knew mashed potatoes, and she knew they were flakes that came in a box.

MishMash

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7831 on: November 16, 2018, 05:31:40 AM »


What finally got me to post here is that in recent months the moocher has apparently been "bitten by the travel bug" and is on his third trip by PLANE this year.  His trips are of course well documented with selfies and memes about the Joy of Travel.  This has apparently made his money situation particularly desperate so he has gone from subtle asks for money ("woe is me I'm so poor how will I eat" quickly followed by "it sure would be nice if a pizza magically appeared on my doorstep."  I wish I was joking.) to not-so-subtle asks.  I mean directly saying "give me money, any money, even a dollar will do" in increasingly creative ways ranging from cutesy to straight up begging.  The frequency of these posts is directly proportional to the frequency of his travel posts and how excited he is to "go off on his next adventure."  Today's post was what pushed me over the edge:  Directions on how to give directly to his paypal because he doesn't know how he'll pay rent (again, that poor roommate) the same day as posting that he bought yet another plane ticket.

We have a lady like that at our mosque, she is always complaining about how she is hungry, how she has no food in the house, etc. She has repeatedly stated that she has government disability payments monthly but is frequently posting on FB about how she has bought new art supplies or she has gotten a new tattoo. Now, I live a good ways from the mosque, about 1/2 hour on public transport. I live very near to the only pay-what-you-can grocery in Canada.  Offered to take her there, since I had to go home anyway.  She refused, saying, ę Thanks, that would be nice but then I would have to cook the food Ľ. I just said, ę okay, let me know if you ever need a ride over there. Salaam aleikum Ľ and then left.  Iíve been told that other people have given her food many times but I canít see that as helpful or sustainable.

i have to admit once i cooked a bowl of plain white rice and offered it to a guy that was always bitching about how hungry he was.  i was young, maybe it was uncooth, but i used to eat a lot of plain rice so i know he wasnt really hungry bc he rejected it

Yea I have a FB friend like this...she used to be HORRIBLE (she's earlier in the thread with some of the stories).  Then she got better for a while, but has recently re started, and now it's rent, food, AND booze and weed that she is begging for.

Don't tell me that Madame Bovary burned through yet another meal ticket, and is looking for a new codependent KISSASS?

Surprisingly she is still with the ex husbands best friend.  However, as a dishonorably discharged vet he has trouble finding employment, and she well, barely graduated high school and has always been pretty lazy, so a hard week of work is 2-3 part time days.  So you know, money problems out the ears. 

He gets rent help from one of the local vet organizations so they now have a place to live (after being evicted from a few a couple of years ago).  He however kicks her out every six months or so when he gets bored or finds a temporary new piece.  So it's "the world is burning down and everyone hates me please send me rent money" on facebook for a while, then she's right back in it again.

And of course, none of their circumstances are their fault.  It's the damn dirty illegal immigrants and that horrible caravan that "took er jobs". 


partgypsy

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7832 on: November 16, 2018, 11:30:28 AM »


There are also people who truly do not know how to cook. One of my tenants had to be taught how to make spaghetti or soup for himself using pre-packaged options. He'd always lived with other family members who had done the cooking and who had discouraged him from so much as stepping into the kitchen. If someone were to have handed this fellow a potato or some dried beans, he'd have been verbally polite but with the same deer-in-the-headlights response you described.


Due to circumstances, a grown-up man aged 50 in my family suddenly has no one to cook for him anymore, and won't for another two months.

He has been calling relatives in desperation for money to pay ffood because he couldn't afford eating out every day and he has been hungry for a while. His siblings didn't want to give him money, understandably (due to other circumstances this guy never has money although he has a good income, a cheap home and no dependants - there's more to this story of course) but if he made a shopping list, they'd drop off a couple of bags of groceries. He absolutely had no idea what to put on a grocery shopping list, because he's never cooked for himself and apparantly rarely even shops for groceries himself. Seems he's been living on bread and canned hotdogs for a few weeks now.

There's a lot more to this story and I don't feel a lot of sympathy for this guy, but it's sad that a grown man can't even imagine going to the grocery store and picking up canned soup, microwave meals or frozen pizza. These days you can even buy meal kits with seasoned meat, chopped up vegetables and fresh noodles that you just have to stir fry for a few minutes. I'm sure there are youtube tutorials about boiling and frying eggs. But this grown-up man sincerely can't feed himself and he's not accepting any help from anyone.

Wow. It sounds like my 12 and 15 year olds know how to prepare more food than this fellow, and I feel their skills are basic. They can both make their own sandwiches and lunches, the oldest can fry a hamburger and make simple recipes, and youngest can make sandwiches, reheat things and make oatmeal, cut fruit and salads. She can crack eggs and flip pancakes, but her technique for those needs work.

MgoSam

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7833 on: November 16, 2018, 11:39:48 AM »
I have no sympathy for people like that. I used to have a receptionist that would eat out each lunch while grumbling at how little she made. When asked why she didn't cook she would mention that she never learned how to cook. I didn't, my mom actively told me not to learn for whatever reason but I figured some things out and now I cook nearly all my meals.

Nowadays there's Youtube, meal kits, and many other ways to get started. Heck if you just post on Facebook, "Anyone wanna help me learn to buy groceries and cook?" He'll likely get scores of responses from people wiling to help him.

People need to want to improve in order to do so.

partgypsy

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7834 on: November 16, 2018, 12:00:29 PM »
It's ironic because both grandmothers were excellent cooks, parents are decent to good cooks, and my Dad is in the restaurant business, but I didn't learn how to cook until I went to college. No one showed me. My sister and I were only allowed to do food prep (like peel and cut vegetables, etc) not allowed or shown how to cook. In college I had a very limited budget so living off campus and cooking my own food was much less expensive, plus during that time I was not eating refined sugar which meant I had to make almost all my food. Had a group of like minded people where not only made meals, but baked goods and breads (including sourdough) yogurt, and homemade mayonaise. And there was always a group of hungry students to eat the food (even if the experiments were not 100% successful!) I look on those days with fondness. Anyways I am not going to make the same mistake and shoo my kids out of the kitchen.
« Last Edit: November 16, 2018, 12:02:08 PM by partgypsy »

MgoSam

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7835 on: November 16, 2018, 12:09:52 PM »
Anyways I am not going to make the same mistake and shoo my kids out of the kitchen.

Agreed! I should add that I do have some sympathy for people that didn't learn how to cook as a kid. Personally I can't imagine why parents wouldn't teach their kids how to cook, it provides them with a necessary skill, they can learn nutrition and how to better care and fend for themselves, and can help with preparing dinner instead of waiting for mommy and daddy to do it.

Just how great would it be for some parents if their son or daughter were to call them and said, "When are you coming home, I'm HUNGRY!!!!" and for mother to be like, "Well there's pasta and sauce in the cupboard have at them," and hang up.

ixtap

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7836 on: November 16, 2018, 12:16:43 PM »
Anyways I am not going to make the same mistake and shoo my kids out of the kitchen.

Agreed! I should add that I do have some sympathy for people that didn't learn how to cook as a kid. Personally I can't imagine why parents wouldn't teach their kids how to cook, it provides them with a necessary skill, they can learn nutrition and how to better care and fend for themselves, and can help with preparing dinner instead of waiting for mommy and daddy to do it.

Just how great would it be for some parents if their son or daughter were to call them and said, "When are you coming home, I'm HUNGRY!!!!" and for mother to be like, "Well there's pasta and sauce in the cupboard have at them," and hang up.

My husband never got much beyond the pasta and sauce stage, but has frequently mentioned that he is going to learn to cook when he has more time in retirement. I keep imagining elaborate french cooking, but in reality, he is generally really impressed that I can open up the cupboard and produce a meal, even if it is seasoning a can of beans to make tacos.

Zikoris

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7837 on: November 16, 2018, 12:23:24 PM »
Anyways I am not going to make the same mistake and shoo my kids out of the kitchen.

Agreed! I should add that I do have some sympathy for people that didn't learn how to cook as a kid. Personally I can't imagine why parents wouldn't teach their kids how to cook, it provides them with a necessary skill, they can learn nutrition and how to better care and fend for themselves, and can help with preparing dinner instead of waiting for mommy and daddy to do it.

Just how great would it be for some parents if their son or daughter were to call them and said, "When are you coming home, I'm HUNGRY!!!!" and for mother to be like, "Well there's pasta and sauce in the cupboard have at them," and hang up.

I know why my parents didn't teach us how to cook growing up - they're absolutely terrible at it :) For a long time I thought I was just a super picky eater, but it turned out I just don't like horrible cooking.

That said, I generally did have to fend for myself food-wise (so I didn't hit 18 at at food level zero, maybe level one or two), but mostly just ate very simple things - sandwiches, cereal, pasta with sauce, veggie burgers. I was so happy to move out on my own and start experimenting and learning to make good stuff. Over the last decade my cooking has improved dramatically since I found a boyfriend who absolutely loves food and eating, as well as trying new foods. If we ever see something interesting, whether it's a menu item, picture, or unusual ingredient in the grocery store, he's always like "Buy it! Make it! Mmmmm food". There's practically nothing the guy actually dislikes.

dcheesi

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7838 on: November 16, 2018, 12:35:15 PM »
Anyways I am not going to make the same mistake and shoo my kids out of the kitchen.

Agreed! I should add that I do have some sympathy for people that didn't learn how to cook as a kid. Personally I can't imagine why parents wouldn't teach their kids how to cook, it provides them with a necessary skill, they can learn nutrition and how to better care and fend for themselves, and can help with preparing dinner instead of waiting for mommy and daddy to do it.

Just how great would it be for some parents if their son or daughter were to call them and said, "When are you coming home, I'm HUNGRY!!!!" and for mother to be like, "Well there's pasta and sauce in the cupboard have at them," and hang up.
Not everyone who can cook can teach. Plus some cooks just can't stand to watch amateurs attempt to make the same dishes; they can't help wanting to just do it themselves so it's done right.

20957

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7839 on: November 16, 2018, 04:57:16 PM »
I know an older guy who can't/doesn't cook - when his wife goes away she leaves meals for him. But what really blew me away was that what she leaves is sandwiches, on plates, with plastic wrap over them. Because his level of can't cook is such that he can't warm up a casserole or make his own sandwich. So crazy, esp because this is a man who machined me a new gear for my stand mixer, and made a stair railing for a neighbor. Cooking is harder than metalwork, I guess? People are so endlessly fascinating.

Zikoris

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7840 on: November 16, 2018, 05:58:24 PM »
I know an older guy who can't/doesn't cook - when his wife goes away she leaves meals for him. But what really blew me away was that what she leaves is sandwiches, on plates, with plastic wrap over them. Because his level of can't cook is such that he can't warm up a casserole or make his own sandwich. So crazy, esp because this is a man who machined me a new gear for my stand mixer, and made a stair railing for a neighbor. Cooking is harder than metalwork, I guess? People are so endlessly fascinating.

Lol, I'm actually not sure if my boyfriend could make a sandwich or not. I hope so? He can reheat stuff if I give him very specific instructions.I do all the cooking, and also make all his food for him when I go away on camping or work trips. It's kind of fun labelling things "Saturday lunch" and stuff.

fredbear

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7841 on: November 16, 2018, 08:48:28 PM »
... Personally I can't imagine why parents wouldn't teach their kids how to cook, it provides them with a necessary skill, they can learn nutrition and how to better care and fend for themselves, and can help with preparing dinner instead of waiting for mommy and daddy to do it.

Just how great would it be for some parents if their son or daughter were to call them and said, "When are you coming home, I'm HUNGRY!!!!" and for mother to be like, "Well there's pasta and sauce in the cupboard have at them," and hang up.

I cycled my 3 through a rotation: one set, one cooked, one cleared and cleaned up.  Next night, same sequence, each kid in a different role.  All three of them now greatly exceed my cooking abilities.  It is a wonderful thing when they gently elbow me aside and do a meal while I set or clean up. 

There were a limited set of family rules about food:

1. "You don't have to eat ANYTHING and you still get desert."/*
2. At the least hint of a complaint you lost everything./**
3. If you didn't like what was served you could go into the kitchen and cook something else for yourself./***

/* My mother always made these spectacular moist chocolate cakes, inches deep in creamy frosting, that filled the house with a rich redolence, and set it out on the sideboard beside the dinner table, on the nights when she made some loathsome italianate glop that extruded tentacles of pollution that flowed in rivulets of corruption and stench across your plate and defiled inoffensive potatoes.  You had to gag those courses down into your rising gorge before you were allowed a slice of the cake.   The risk for my kids was that I was not a very desert-conscious father, and they might cast their dinner into the outer darkness of the Disposal, all for a desert that wasn't there.
/** I never could abide those whiny-snot-shit little kids who say, "Yuck!  DADDY?!  What IS this Shit?"  My kids grew to love this rule, and on nights when they invited their little pards over would eat until their junior fredbear bellies distended, elbow their little buddy and whisper, "Watch this!  Wait'll you see what my dad does!" and then announce in their big voice, "Daddy, I HATE this shit," gesturing at a salad or some medium-rare elk-meat scraps.  Instantly I would grab their plate, scrape it onto mine, and finish their dinner, while they were nudging their friend and saying, "See?  Now you!  You try it!" until some politely-raised little 9-year-old, convinced that if his mommy ever heard about it he would be hided timed out, would peep, "Mr Fredbear, I, uh, I ... don't like this, uh, very much," and I would scrape their plate onto mine and finish it up while they giggled.
/*** If you could find something else.  Mostly we were a pretty active family (in addition to hunting, fishing, road and mountain biking, the kids lettered in 8 sports) and given to righteous hunger, so if you hesitated over your dinner, a spear-like forest of forks would be aimed at your plate from all sides, and little piping voices would be saying (as they said on the night we [may have, or maybe not] served dog to Bunter), "Excuse me, Ms Grimsqueaker.   You gonna finish that dog?"  And if you said, weakly, with Thyestean queasiness, "Uh, it's, uh, not really ... Dog... is it Mr Fredbear?"  Nervously:  "It's moose, isn't it?  Or maybe, uh, pronghorn?"

"An airedale cross, I'd say.  If it is dog."

"This is some sort of awful joke, isn't, Mr Fredbear?  Isn't it?"

"We don't Waste Protein in this house, Bunter."

And if after that you did say, "Uh, I'm not that hungry," the forks would stab down and lance the mystery meat off your plate and with a sort of polite intensity the little fredbears, like so many Malamute puppies,/**** would snap it all up and gulp it all down.

/****There be three things that are said to be Death: to be in the tower of Big Ben during the ringing of a Peal; to get between Senator Chuck Schumer and a tv camera; to interpose yourself between a litter of 6-month-old Alaskan malamutes and blubber.

Zikoris

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7842 on: November 16, 2018, 10:48:58 PM »
I know an older guy who can't/doesn't cook - when his wife goes away she leaves meals for him. But what really blew me away was that what she leaves is sandwiches, on plates, with plastic wrap over them. Because his level of can't cook is such that he can't warm up a casserole or make his own sandwich. So crazy, esp because this is a man who machined me a new gear for my stand mixer, and made a stair railing for a neighbor. Cooking is harder than metalwork, I guess? People are so endlessly fascinating.

Lol, I'm actually not sure if my boyfriend could make a sandwich or not. I hope so? He can reheat stuff if I give him very specific instructions.I do all the cooking, and also make all his food for him when I go away on camping or work trips. It's kind of fun labelling things "Saturday lunch" and stuff.

Update: When I got home from work I asked him if he thought he could make a sandwich. We went through the steps and he thinks he could do it if he didn't have to slice anything - he can't really use knives.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7843 on: November 17, 2018, 12:25:27 AM »
I suspect that in many cases, it's a generational thing. My parents very much followed the traditional split of responsibilities--he brought home the bacon, and she ran the household. He never cooked, and could barely follow a recipe.  A lot changed after he retired :)

AnnaGrowsAMustache

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7844 on: November 17, 2018, 12:47:02 AM »
I can understand not cooking while someone else is there to do it for you. You'd have to be some kind of stupid to actually go hungry rather than being able to figure out how to make a damn sandwich, however. I can't imagine how you could get through life if you were so completely ignorant that you were unable to google how to heat soup, ffs.

Mind you, there are some very stupid people around. One of the women at my work started buying coffees several times a day..... because the regular instant coffee in the staff room had been replaced with the same brand of instant coffee in 'expresso'. She didn't know what it was and didn't want to try it......

People like this are why we need a zombie apocalypse.

Hula Hoop

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7845 on: November 17, 2018, 01:22:28 AM »
I suspect that in many cases, it's a generational thing. My parents very much followed the traditional split of responsibilities--he brought home the bacon, and she ran the household. He never cooked, and could barely follow a recipe.  A lot changed after he retired :)


My husband grew up like this.  His sisters learned to cook and he didn't because he's a boy.  However he moved out of home at 18 and now we have 2 kids to feed in addition to ourselves.  We both work full time but his hours are more flexible so he often does the shopping and cooking. It's not rocket science. If he doesn't know how to cook something he Google recipes.

marty998

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7846 on: November 17, 2018, 03:50:12 AM »
I suspect that in many cases, it's a generational thing. My parents very much followed the traditional split of responsibilities--he brought home the bacon, and she ran the household. He never cooked, and could barely follow a recipe.  A lot changed after he retired :)

He had to cook his own bacon? :)

OtherJen

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7847 on: November 17, 2018, 07:18:53 AM »
I suspect that in many cases, it's a generational thing. My parents very much followed the traditional split of responsibilities--he brought home the bacon, and she ran the household. He never cooked, and could barely follow a recipe.  A lot changed after he retired :)


My husband grew up like this.  His sisters learned to cook and he didn't because he's a boy.  However he moved out of home at 18 and now we have 2 kids to feed in addition to ourselves.  We both work full time but his hours are more flexible so he often does the shopping and cooking. It's not rocket science. If he doesn't know how to cook something he Google recipes.

Sounds like my parents. My mom had to learn to cook when my grandfather went on medical disability and my grandma went to work. God forbid that her brothers learned any kitchen skills. Her younger brother took cooking classes as an adult and hosted some memorably delicious family holiday meals, but her older brother remains stymied by anything more complex than a sandwich (his wife never worked outside the home).

My dad grew up in a Mexican immigrant household with strict gender roles, and my grandmotherís cooking was legendary. Although he liked to be in the kitchen with his mom (dad was the youngest son and a mamaís boy), she never actually let him do the work. Retirement has been good for him because heís discovered that heís actually a good cook and now does all cooking and grocery shopping (mom still works full time). Google and YouTube have been huge helps; if he doesnít know how to do something, he looks up a video.

dragoncar

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7848 on: November 18, 2018, 12:26:05 AM »
I know an older guy who can't/doesn't cook - when his wife goes away she leaves meals for him. But what really blew me away was that what she leaves is sandwiches, on plates, with plastic wrap over them. Because his level of can't cook is such that he can't warm up a casserole or make his own sandwich. So crazy, esp because this is a man who machined me a new gear for my stand mixer, and made a stair railing for a neighbor. Cooking is harder than metalwork, I guess? People are so endlessly fascinating.

Usually wonít, not canít.  That said, cooking does take practice to become proficient.  I feel like I didnít learn to cook until after I was FI.  Before that I was passable, but I just didnít have the time to really refine my instincts

RePatriot

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #7849 on: November 18, 2018, 12:51:42 PM »
A FB friend recently posted a job listing for a tire plant, saying it was decent pay and good hours.  A few people expressed interest when a mutual acquaintance, billing themselves on their page as a "Business and Lifestyle Coach" and "Financial Advisor."  I believe the second role is with Primerica or a similar institution that charges outrageous fees.

The lauded coach chimed in that Job stands for "Just Over Broke" and that he much prefers to find business opportunities that provide residual income.  His rather long post was looking down on working class schlubs and trying to draw clients that would fall for his high-powered c-suite jargon bullshit.

I wrote a sarcastic post agreeing and saying that I too preferred parasitically leaching value from people who are simply trying to responsibly save for retirement while working their jobs.  I thought better of it and deleted it, but it is still stuck in my craw.  I really want to prevent people for falling for this crap, though.