Author Topic: Overheard on Facebook  (Read 2163047 times)

Miss Piggy

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5500 on: November 07, 2016, 09:54:42 AM »
Overheard on Facebook: "I'm looking for a hairdresser for a little baby! She's only 4 months old, so I need someone with experience!"

Same person's post, 2 hours prior: "so broke lol gonna have to wait till payday for groceries!!"

*sigh*

C'mon now...this baby is in her formative months. One bad haircut could scar her for life!

Kitsune

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5501 on: November 07, 2016, 09:59:29 AM »
Overheard on Facebook: "I'm looking for a hairdresser for a little baby! She's only 4 months old, so I need someone with experience!"

Same person's post, 2 hours prior: "so broke lol gonna have to wait till payday for groceries!!"

*sigh*

C'mon now...this baby is in her formative months. One bad haircut could scar her for life!

Only if you're not using safety scissors. :P

In all seriousness: my kid is 2.5, and I give her a trim when I need to. My husband has long hair - every so often he asks me to give him a trim (his hair is long and thin, so it's basically a question of 'cut a straight line a few inches below shoulders'). This isn't rocket science that needs super-specific training. Thick hair that you want layered, sure, I have no idea how I'd do that. But "trim so it doesn't look uneven" shouldn't be beyond the reach of anyone who can use scissors.

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5502 on: November 07, 2016, 10:32:46 AM »
Overheard on Facebook: "I'm looking for a hairdresser for a little baby! She's only 4 months old, so I need someone with experience!"

Same person's post, 2 hours prior: "so broke lol gonna have to wait till payday for groceries!!"

*sigh*

C'mon now...this baby is in her formative months. One bad haircut could scar her for life!

Only if you're not using safety scissors. :P

In all seriousness: my kid is 2.5, and I give her a trim when I need to. My husband has long hair - every so often he asks me to give him a trim (his hair is long and thin, so it's basically a question of 'cut a straight line a few inches below shoulders'). This isn't rocket science that needs super-specific training. Thick hair that you want layered, sure, I have no idea how I'd do that. But "trim so it doesn't look uneven" shouldn't be beyond the reach of anyone who can use scissors.

Much of what people go to "professionals" for is very do-able at home. Nail salons, eyebrow plucking kiosks, and similar services come to mind. Yes, there are some extreme high-maintenance things that should require training, but as a society we're leading our young people to believe it's biologically impossible to apply nail polish or wield a pair of tweezers on oneself.
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Undefined

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5503 on: November 07, 2016, 11:14:47 AM »
Quote
Much of what people go to "professionals" for is very do-able at home. Nail salons, eyebrow plucking kiosks, and similar services come to mind. Yes, there are some extreme high-maintenance things that should require training, but as a society we're leading our young people to believe it's biologically impossible to apply nail polish or wield a pair of tweezers on oneself.

Exactly this!  I think it should be a requirement that you should at least attempt this kind of stuff on your own before paying for it.  Yeah, that does mean you might wind up with a bad self dye job, or an uneven haircut, or messy nail polish or whatnot.  Maybe you'll even fail: my first attempt at plucking my own eyebrows was, shall we say, a learning experience. 

I don't think it matters, really, after that if you pay for someone else to do it for you or not.  (Well, as long as you can afford it without being stupid and going into debt because you must get your nails maincured every week or whatever.)

But it gives you a lot more appreciation for someone doing the task WELL if you know you've struggled with it.  It drives me nuts to see women berating the people who do their nails and hair for missing one small little spot - like, really, lady, could you have managed it that well?  Have you ever even tried this before? 

I get a haircut once a year or so (hair is long and straight, not much else to do to it), and I get my toenails done maybe every other year as a treat.  My eyebrows are another story; they want me to come in every four weeks, but I have them do it nice once and then maintain them myself for as long as I can before going back in to do it again.  But knowing how badly I fail at doing them completely myself makes it a lot easier to hand over the $25 to have someone else do them a few times a year, and makes me a lot more forgiving if I notice she missed a strand here or there.

Making Cookies

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5504 on: November 07, 2016, 02:55:16 PM »
What changed? Is this an extension of "faux-luxury" that people seem to crave now?

When I was growing up it seemed all the women I knew got together and did hair, nails, whatever they thought was important together in the kitchen.

I'm sure mistakes were made.

This past weekend I listened to our younger child complain that they could not draw well. Consequently my DW should do it for them b/c she was good. DW taught the age old "history lesson" about how she is good at what she does b/c she practiced alot when she was the same age, etc. etc. I hope that made a lasting memory.

shelivesthedream

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5505 on: November 08, 2016, 01:58:24 AM »
What changed? Is this an extension of "faux-luxury" that people seem to crave now?

When I was growing up it seemed all the women I knew got together and did hair, nails, whatever they thought was important together in the kitchen.

I'm sure mistakes were made.

This past weekend I listened to our younger child complain that they could not draw well. Consequently my DW should do it for them b/c she was good. DW taught the age old "history lesson" about how she is good at what she does b/c she practiced alot when she was the same age, etc. etc. I hope that made a lasting memory.

Something I'm trying to remember too is that you don't have to be good at something to enjoy it. I'm crap at drawing but went to a local drawing meetup the other week and had a great time.

engineermom21

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5506 on: November 09, 2016, 08:48:03 AM »
Sadly, I have one that tops this.  My MIL just bought a new-to-her jeep for $22,000....with 180,000 miles on it....and an interest rate of 28%.  Twenty-eight freaking percent!  Her payments are something like $500 a month.  For an old jeep.  Nothing at all special about it.  I have so many stories I could tell that would boggle your mind, but this is her most recent one.

And you married her offspring?
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

[MOD NOTE: That's a bit crude.  You can see how a friendly discussion can get derailed by this sort of thing.]

Has dear spouse exhibited any of this behavior yet?

Yup.  And he is as opposite from her as a person can be.  Just as frugal and focused on early retirement as I am.

engineermom21

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5507 on: November 09, 2016, 08:56:29 AM »

Cars can last a long time. We have 300K on our grocery getter daily driver. However the past a certain mileage - the car lasts because it was treated well and I have a negative expectation that the average vehicle was treated well enough to last to huge miles.

To me - anything with that many miles isn't worth much unless it was fully restored aka antique/collectible with a properly rebuilt driveline and suspension.

She definitely being taken advantage of in about three different ways there. Tell her I said she ought to start saving up for an engine or transmission rebuild. The smart thing would be to get rid of it soon and avoid the interest. I have no idea if a repo would be worthwhile. Might force her into something she can afford for cash though aka something thrifty and car like.

I'm curious about its real resale value. Maybe $10K?

Not sure about the resale value, but probably a lot less than she paid, I'm sure.  The even more sad thing is that she supposedly bought it from a "friend" at the dealership.  We have tried to help guide her in the right direction in the past with her financial decisions, but some people just can not change or be helped.  Unfortunately most of my husband's family is the same way.  How he turned out so completely different from them, I will never know, but I'm so grateful for it!

MishMash

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5508 on: November 10, 2016, 11:24:08 AM »
Ala Madame Bovary: 

Today a meme captioned with a Thank you Trump for becoming president!!!!: 1776 Give us liberty or give us death!  2016: Give us free stuff or we will whine and cry!

Now if you all recall from ealier postings ALL THIS GIRL HAS DONE IS WHINE AND CRY AND BEG FOR FREE STUFF for the past year.  Everything from gofund me's for rent and car payments/repairs, to a multiple paged Christmas list on Amazon for $100 plus toys for her kids and several pages of stuff like $200 northface jackets and $100 plus hair treatments for her and her boy toy.   I mean she LITERALLY posts at least once a week, some piece of jewelry or article of clothing captioned with WANT!! or Someone buy this for me puuuhllllleeeaaassseee!


She has turned down all resonable offers for help, like me offerring her some of moms overload of garden veggies (she wanted food she "likes" instead).  So she is ridiculing EXACTLY what she has spent the past year doing as a result of her own decisions.  But it's OK for her because she just "fell on hard times" (aka, never got an education, never held a full time job, never developed life skills then cheated on her military meal ticket who kicked her out).

My favorite responses
1.  Yea! I know, these millenials are ridiculous always wanting free stuff! (written by a millenial, as her and I are as well, this could be a silent jest at OP but I doubt it)
2.  Hell if I have to pay for my cell phone so should everyone else! (Ok fair enough, but this person is on pretty much every form of government assistance out there last I heard via my mother)
3.  Maybe now we can get jobs! (written by the local town junkie with 3 arrests for drugs that I know of, 2 of which were non weed ones)
4.  I can't wait for this country to BURN!!! (OK so you don't like it...move?)

It just took EVERYTHING in me not to type a response of "So it's OK for you to beg and whine and cry for free stuff (that you don't need)...how does that work"  Every. ounce. of. self. control.  Mainly because the post right after that was how they failed their eviction case (of course) and I am seriously not trying to kick someone when they are down...but ooooooh the urge is real.

frugalsurfer

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5509 on: November 10, 2016, 03:27:40 PM »
I am seriously not trying to kick someone when they are down...but ooooooh the urge is real.

Unfriend and move on. That's what I did to all my old acquaintances. You can't beat stupid.

MgoSam

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5510 on: November 10, 2016, 03:37:32 PM »
I am seriously not trying to kick someone when they are down...but ooooooh the urge is real.

Unfriend and move on. That's what I did to all my old acquaintances. You can't beat stupid.

You can do this, or at the least unfollow them (then their posts won't show up on your newsfeed). I'm seriously thinking of doing for a lot of people that are either

a. Jerks
b. Sell things that are junk
c. Post things that do not interest me in any way

dragoncar

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5511 on: November 10, 2016, 06:01:24 PM »
IF Y'ALL HAVE CREDIT CARD DEBT UNFRIEND ME

shelivesthedream

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5512 on: November 11, 2016, 02:16:54 AM »
I unfollowed all my friends. Every single one. I had a totally blank newsfeed for months. It was fantastic. Now I'm deciding whether to re-follow just a few people that I actually miss having updates from, or whether to carry on manually going to their profile whenever I wonder what they're up to. I would highly recommend the mass unfollow.

MgoSam

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5513 on: November 11, 2016, 02:48:16 AM »
^^^ That's an idea worth considering.

theadvicist

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5514 on: November 11, 2016, 05:14:18 AM »
Don't unfriend Madame Bovary, she is one of my favourite sources of entertainment!

I honestly don't know how you let that 'whine and beg for free stuff' comment go though. You have AMAZING self-control.

MishMash

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5515 on: November 11, 2016, 06:42:02 AM »
Don't unfriend Madame Bovary, she is one of my favourite sources of entertainment!

I honestly don't know how you let that 'whine and beg for free stuff' comment go though. You have AMAZING self-control.

Part of my new years resolution, be nicer to people I want to bitch slap.  I have a very strong D type personality and have a really hard time empathizing with things/people so I've actually been working really really really hard this year to put myself in other peoples shoes.  She just seriously tested my upper limit though, I haven't been on FaceBook since I saw that

kayvent

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5516 on: November 11, 2016, 07:40:19 AM »
Quote
Much of what people go to "professionals" for is very do-able at home. Nail salons, eyebrow plucking kiosks, and similar services come to mind. Yes, there are some extreme high-maintenance things that should require training, but as a society we're leading our young people to believe it's biologically impossible to apply nail polish or wield a pair of tweezers on oneself.

Exactly this!  I think it should be a requirement that you should at least attempt this kind of stuff on your own before paying for it.  Yeah, that does mean you might wind up with a bad self dye job, or an uneven haircut, or messy nail polish or whatnot.  Maybe you'll even fail: my first attempt at plucking my own eyebrows was, shall we say, a learning experience.

For about a year I tried to give myself a regular haircut. I never botched it or did a horrible job but I found it never looked as good as a professional. The mess was also horrible. I'm undecided on whether I'll go to a professional now or try to get better on myself.

Making Cookies

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5517 on: November 11, 2016, 08:02:08 AM »
I unfollowed all my friends. Every single one. I had a totally blank newsfeed for months. It was fantastic. Now I'm deciding whether to re-follow just a few people that I actually miss having updates from, or whether to carry on manually going to their profile whenever I wonder what they're up to. I would highly recommend the mass unfollow.

I went a different direction and just quit Facebook entirely. I miss some of the pics from friends but nothing else about FB. I especially don't miss feeling addicted to the feed.

VladTheImpaler

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5518 on: November 11, 2016, 08:14:13 AM »
^^^^ I quit facebook too and do not miss it.
No body was posting anything helpful or interesting.
It was just a never ending stream of "Look at me" and "Please validate my existence."
I don't have time for that.
Mark Zuckerberg also just pisses me off. I refuse to be his pawn.
We are enriching that goon with our own vanity, insecurity, and ego.
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Making Cookies

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5519 on: November 11, 2016, 08:17:35 AM »
I quit during one of the election cycles - either 2008 or 2012. I don't remember. The politics in my feed was way too much to absorb and wildly inaccurate to boot. I just didn't have any spare brain cells i was willing to give to FB. ;)

I don't like election year rhetoric. Speak truthfully and accurately or not at all. As you might imagine this last one was especially painful to witness.

mm1970

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5520 on: November 11, 2016, 08:47:55 AM »
Ala Madame Bovary: 

Today a meme captioned with a Thank you Trump for becoming president!!!!: 1776 Give us liberty or give us death!  2016: Give us free stuff or we will whine and cry!

Now if you all recall from ealier postings ALL THIS GIRL HAS DONE IS WHINE AND CRY AND BEG FOR FREE STUFF for the past year.  Everything from gofund me's for rent and car payments/repairs, to a multiple paged Christmas list on Amazon for $100 plus toys for her kids and several pages of stuff like $200 northface jackets and $100 plus hair treatments for her and her boy toy.   I mean she LITERALLY posts at least once a week, some piece of jewelry or article of clothing captioned with WANT!! or Someone buy this for me puuuhllllleeeaaassseee!


She has turned down all resonable offers for help, like me offerring her some of moms overload of garden veggies (she wanted food she "likes" instead).  So she is ridiculing EXACTLY what she has spent the past year doing as a result of her own decisions.  But it's OK for her because she just "fell on hard times" (aka, never got an education, never held a full time job, never developed life skills then cheated on her military meal ticket who kicked her out).

My favorite responses
1.  Yea! I know, these millenials are ridiculous always wanting free stuff! (written by a millenial, as her and I are as well, this could be a silent jest at OP but I doubt it)
2.  Hell if I have to pay for my cell phone so should everyone else! (Ok fair enough, but this person is on pretty much every form of government assistance out there last I heard via my mother)
3.  Maybe now we can get jobs! (written by the local town junkie with 3 arrests for drugs that I know of, 2 of which were non weed ones)
4.  I can't wait for this country to BURN!!! (OK so you don't like it...move?)

It just took EVERYTHING in me not to type a response of "So it's OK for you to beg and whine and cry for free stuff (that you don't need)...how does that work"  Every. ounce. of. self. control.  Mainly because the post right after that was how they failed their eviction case (of course) and I am seriously not trying to kick someone when they are down...but ooooooh the urge is real.

Had lunch with a friend yesterday. One of her FB friends posted a "Thank god for trump" followed by a rant on how she's in HELL because she lives in CA and the propositions that passed are going to increase taxes, and everyone who voted that way is SO STUPID THAT THEY DON'T REALIZE THEY ARE INCREASING TAXES.  Every argument with her was followed by another crazy rant.  My friend was reading them to me.  It was pretty hilarious. 

Um, is it too hard to believe that people are good at math, but have different values?  Even locally, someone on our local newspaper site made a similar rant, about how he's going to pay more.  I noted that most of the propositions went my way.  He said "now you are going to be paying more".  I answered "yes, I was well aware of that when I voted."

mm1970

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5521 on: November 11, 2016, 08:55:44 AM »
I unfollowed all my friends. Every single one. I had a totally blank newsfeed for months. It was fantastic. Now I'm deciding whether to re-follow just a few people that I actually miss having updates from, or whether to carry on manually going to their profile whenever I wonder what they're up to. I would highly recommend the mass unfollow.

I went a different direction and just quit Facebook entirely. I miss some of the pics from friends but nothing else about FB. I especially don't miss feeling addicted to the feed.

About 2 weeks before the election, when my local bubble was *sure* Hillary was going to win, but the kind of posts coming from my *other* peeps (family in rural PA, former military) made me worry...I realized I needed a break.

I'd already unfollowed at least a dozen people on both sides of the aisle.  (One exception, the very political / leftist socialist guy who posts very thoughtful links on both sides...truly well balanced).  But it didn't help.  Just *seeing* the headlines in my feed as I desperately looked for the cute kid pics were causing me to lose sleep.  I told my husband that I didn't want to hear about whatever he was reading either, because it was causing me stress (that whole "locus of control" thing).

So for about 2 weeks, I would check FB in the morning for my "On This Day" memories of cute kids.  But the *minute* I saw a political post, I closed it.  And then: after work, no social media (thank goodness instagram was still cute kid pics).  I cooked dinner, hung out with the family, and sat and did a lot of crocheting for a Christmas gift.  I figured if I did 3 rows a night I'd finish by the end of the month.  Anyway...crocheting is very relaxing and zen-inducing.  In two weeks, I worked my way through at least 4 balls of yarn, with only 2 more to go until I'm done.  On the weekends, I used my time to clean up and putter, and worked on a couple of quilts.

It's been glorious.  This week has been a tough one for me, but I really am considering continuing the ban next week.  It's hard though.  I'm contrary, and I like arguing with people and pointing out their inconsistencies.  I find it fun.  Both sides of the aisle.  The ridiculous people who think we should get rid of the electoral college NOW and make Hillary president.  The people who think that others should not be allowed to protest (freedom of speech anyone?)  The people who say "if you don't like it, leave", but in the same breath will say "the Syrians should stay and fix their own country".

frugalnacho

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5522 on: November 11, 2016, 09:24:02 AM »
I have a facebook account but I never log in. 

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5523 on: November 11, 2016, 09:29:18 AM »
Um, is it too hard to believe that people are good at math, but have different values?  Even locally, someone on our local newspaper site made a similar rant, about how he's going to pay more.  I noted that most of the propositions went my way.  He said "now you are going to be paying more".  I answered "yes, I was well aware of that when I voted."

Ironically, the people who whine about taxes going up are the same ones who complain when the city they live in lacks basic infrastructure items such as working roads, libraries, public hospitals, and schools.
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Half-Borg

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5524 on: November 11, 2016, 10:26:48 AM »
When my city weren't able to provide basic infrastructure, I'd be complaining too. I want something back for my taxes.

JLee

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5525 on: November 11, 2016, 10:29:06 AM »
Sometimes you might make more money but your lower income friend spends far more on "stuff and things" further worsening their savings situation making their cash flow problem a "DUH!" moment.

Feels good to be wise enough to put back some acorns for later. In my case it was education by failures. Don't want to be broke? Do something about it!

Oh, yeah, totally. If you make half what I do but spend more than I do, that's just not gonna work at some point.

But I have low-income friends who DO save, but... y'know. Less. Because there's less to go around. And that's not actually shameful, that's just a fact of life/math.

Exactly. I guess most of us have been those low income people early in our lives. That said, its tough to be lower income AND drawn to spend on things you don't need and thus find yourself in a pinch when real needs pop up. Been there and its what motivated DW and I to make more money/get education/spend differently.

I don't look down on these folks but I do question (in my head) why they are smoking, driving a thirsty something with expensive tires, and planning vacations to expensive places on credit cards. Live and let live but don't complain too loudly when the paychecks won't pay for it all.

That car loan ought to have one more line that tells the total cost of the loan $20K @ 20% for X years = $34K. I guess all the info is out there via the 'net in the form of calculators and car loan descriptions and "True Value" estimations.

Still it always bothers me to see someone taken advantage of.

My credit union actually does - the paperwork you have to sign tells you the total cost of credit over the full term.

frugalnacho

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5526 on: November 11, 2016, 10:30:56 AM »
Sometimes you might make more money but your lower income friend spends far more on "stuff and things" further worsening their savings situation making their cash flow problem a "DUH!" moment.

Feels good to be wise enough to put back some acorns for later. In my case it was education by failures. Don't want to be broke? Do something about it!

Oh, yeah, totally. If you make half what I do but spend more than I do, that's just not gonna work at some point.

But I have low-income friends who DO save, but... y'know. Less. Because there's less to go around. And that's not actually shameful, that's just a fact of life/math.

Exactly. I guess most of us have been those low income people early in our lives. That said, its tough to be lower income AND drawn to spend on things you don't need and thus find yourself in a pinch when real needs pop up. Been there and its what motivated DW and I to make more money/get education/spend differently.

I don't look down on these folks but I do question (in my head) why they are smoking, driving a thirsty something with expensive tires, and planning vacations to expensive places on credit cards. Live and let live but don't complain too loudly when the paychecks won't pay for it all.

That car loan ought to have one more line that tells the total cost of the loan $20K @ 20% for X years = $34K. I guess all the info is out there via the 'net in the form of calculators and car loan descriptions and "True Value" estimations.

Still it always bothers me to see someone taken advantage of.

My credit union actually does - the paperwork you have to sign tells you the total cost of credit over the full term.

Who reads paperwork before they sign it?

druth

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5527 on: November 11, 2016, 10:58:19 AM »
I unfollowed all my friends. Every single one. I had a totally blank newsfeed for months. It was fantastic. Now I'm deciding whether to re-follow just a few people that I actually miss having updates from, or whether to carry on manually going to their profile whenever I wonder what they're up to. I would highly recommend the mass unfollow.

Great idea.  I often have wished i could keep facebook for events without being tempted by the info overload of the newsfeed.  Especially right now my facebook is nothing but negative.

Just unfollowed everybody. "No stories to show" whew! Feels great!

MrsDinero

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5528 on: November 11, 2016, 11:01:19 AM »
I unfollowed all my friends. Every single one. I had a totally blank newsfeed for months. It was fantastic. Now I'm deciding whether to re-follow just a few people that I actually miss having updates from, or whether to carry on manually going to their profile whenever I wonder what they're up to. I would highly recommend the mass unfollow.

Great idea.  I often have wished i could keep facebook for events without being tempted by the info overload of the newsfeed.  Especially right now my facebook is nothing but negative.

Just unfollowed everybody. "No stories to show" whew! Feels great!

I belong to a lot of craft and local sale groups.  I've set up my newsfeed so those always show on the top.  Most of the time I never see posts other than those.  I have some friends who also fall into the top category too, but those friend usually post funny cat videos.

MrMoogle

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5529 on: November 11, 2016, 11:34:27 AM »
Um, is it too hard to believe that people are good at math, but have different values?  Even locally, someone on our local newspaper site made a similar rant, about how he's going to pay more.  I noted that most of the propositions went my way.  He said "now you are going to be paying more".  I answered "yes, I was well aware of that when I voted."

Ironically, the people who whine about taxes going up are the same ones who complain when the city they live in lacks basic infrastructure items such as working roads, libraries, public hospitals, and schools.
Well in Birmingham taxes kept going up and up, but the infrastructure kept getting worse and worse.  Some of the worst corruption in recent history happened there.  I think something like $4Billion was paid out to friends and families of the Mayor and key supporters, many are in jail now.  It's one of the biggest cities that have gone bankrupt.  So there are instances it is acceptable to whine about both.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5530 on: November 11, 2016, 11:57:20 AM »
Um, is it too hard to believe that people are good at math, but have different values?  Even locally, someone on our local newspaper site made a similar rant, about how he's going to pay more.  I noted that most of the propositions went my way.  He said "now you are going to be paying more".  I answered "yes, I was well aware of that when I voted."

Ironically, the people who whine about taxes going up are the same ones who complain when the city they live in lacks basic infrastructure items such as working roads, libraries, public hospitals, and schools.
It's also possible that the complainers object to things other than what you've listed?  Like overly-generous public employee pensions, high-speed rail boondoggles, or sports stadiums?

Kitsune

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5531 on: November 11, 2016, 12:10:26 PM »
Sometimes you might make more money but your lower income friend spends far more on "stuff and things" further worsening their savings situation making their cash flow problem a "DUH!" moment.

Feels good to be wise enough to put back some acorns for later. In my case it was education by failures. Don't want to be broke? Do something about it!

Oh, yeah, totally. If you make half what I do but spend more than I do, that's just not gonna work at some point.

But I have low-income friends who DO save, but... y'know. Less. Because there's less to go around. And that's not actually shameful, that's just a fact of life/math.

Exactly. I guess most of us have been those low income people early in our lives. That said, its tough to be lower income AND drawn to spend on things you don't need and thus find yourself in a pinch when real needs pop up. Been there and its what motivated DW and I to make more money/get education/spend differently.

I don't look down on these folks but I do question (in my head) why they are smoking, driving a thirsty something with expensive tires, and planning vacations to expensive places on credit cards. Live and let live but don't complain too loudly when the paychecks won't pay for it all.

That car loan ought to have one more line that tells the total cost of the loan $20K @ 20% for X years = $34K. I guess all the info is out there via the 'net in the form of calculators and car loan descriptions and "True Value" estimations.

Still it always bothers me to see someone taken advantage of.

My credit union actually does - the paperwork you have to sign tells you the total cost of credit over the full term.

Who reads paperwork before they sign it?

*weep*

Am I the only person who will read every word of a contract before signing it, to the great exasperation of the people who just want to get on with screwing me over??

frugalnacho

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5532 on: November 11, 2016, 12:29:26 PM »
*weep*

Am I the only person who will read every word of a contract before signing it, to the great exasperation of the people who just want to get on with screwing me over??

No I read it as well, as I'm sure many in this forum do.  I was making a humor joke given this particular sub forum and thread.  I doubt the person who had a $20k loan @ 20% read it though.  You don't get loans at 20% by being financially responsible and reading over your contracts.

Kitsune

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5533 on: November 11, 2016, 12:47:57 PM »
*weep*

Am I the only person who will read every word of a contract before signing it, to the great exasperation of the people who just want to get on with screwing me over??

No I read it as well, as I'm sure many in this forum do.  I was making a humor joke given this particular sub forum and thread.  I doubt the person who had a $20k loan @ 20% read it though.  You don't get loans at 20% by being financially responsible and reading over your contracts.

I know. I know so hard.

I had that argument with my boss at work, recently... realized I'd never signed an employement contract (I had a 2-page detailed offer letter that suited my purposes, so I'd never followed up on it) and it was needed for paperwork purposes so he gave me the standard template, and I refused to sign it without one change... and he said no one had ever asked for it or read it before signing. Like, WHUT. How can you not read the details of your employement contract, WTF.

For the record, what I wanted changed was a clause stating that no employee was authorized to have a second job or to work freelance contracts without the written authorization of the boss. Um, NO. I'll sign a non-compete agreement, or an agreement that I won't do freelance work in the same field or with the company's clients, sure, that's fine. But I'm not signing away my right to run an etsy store/snow shoveling business/sell eggs from my chickens/sell gift baskets/etc without written authorization from the boss, what the everloving... And no one else, in 15 years, had even read that clause, let alone made a fuss about it.

(It got changed. I signed. The boss said he was suddenly very thankful that I was the person in charge of his contract negotiations. The end.)


Uturn

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5534 on: November 11, 2016, 01:05:46 PM »
I doubt the person who had a $20k loan @ 20% read it though. 

Sometimes they do though, and don't care.  Years ago a friend asked me to look over a used car that he was buying since I'm pretty good with a wrench.  I told him the car was fine, but they were charging him 18%, he needs to renegotiate that.  He looked at me like I had a third eye and said "but the payment is within my budget and this is the car I want."   This is a pretty smart guy in just about every topic I've ever discussed with him, except his personal finances.  He just can't get past "I want" and "I can afford the monthly payment."  It's truly sad because he believes that only the wealthy can have enough saving to pay in full. 
It's not about money, it's about mindset

Paul der Krake

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5535 on: November 11, 2016, 01:42:53 PM »
I have signed contracts with unenforceable broad clauses, or clauses I do not agree with and fully intend to violate.

I would be a full time, unemployed negotiator if I refused.

Kitsune

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5536 on: November 11, 2016, 01:45:39 PM »
I have signed contracts with unenforceable broad clauses, or clauses I do not agree with and fully intend to violate.

I would be a full time, unemployed negotiator if I refused.

Ah. Whereas I'm a full-time employed negotiator - as in, that's my job. ;)

And yeah, I've signed those clauses before, but... well. It's a small town, there's nothing I can do that won't get back to the office, I seriously don't want to set myself up in a crappy spot if I don't have to. Turns out I didn't have to. God I love working for a reasonable person.

runningthroughFIRE

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5537 on: November 11, 2016, 02:08:17 PM »
A girl I dated in high school/early college and somewhat reconnected with recently posted "God this has been a long day.  Who want to go out and get drunk with me tonight???" and then 2 days later "UGH! Does anyone know somewhere that's hiring? I need another job to make my rent this month".  She's posted multiple pictures of makeup sets as big as my desktop computer captioned #goals since then as well.

merula

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5538 on: November 11, 2016, 02:25:34 PM »
A girl I dated in high school/early college and somewhat reconnected with recently posted "God this has been a long day.  Who want to go out and get drunk with me tonight???" and then 2 days later "UGH! Does anyone know somewhere that's hiring? I need another job to make my rent this month".  She's posted multiple pictures of makeup sets as big as my desktop computer captioned #goals since then as well.
Congrats on dodging that bullet.

neverrun

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5539 on: November 11, 2016, 05:15:28 PM »


I know. I know so hard.

I had that argument with my boss at work, recently... realized I'd never signed an employement contract (I had a 2-page detailed offer letter that suited my purposes, so I'd never followed up on it) and it was needed for paperwork purposes so he gave me the standard template, and I refused to sign it without one change... and he said no one had ever asked for it or read it before signing. Like, WHUT. How can you not read the details of your employement contract, WTF.

For the record, what I wanted changed was a clause stating that no employee was authorized to have a second job or to work freelance contracts without the written authorization of the boss. Um, NO. I'll sign a non-compete agreement, or an agreement that I won't do freelance work in the same field or with the company's clients, sure, that's fine. But I'm not signing away my right to run an etsy store/snow shoveling business/sell eggs from my chickens/sell gift baskets/etc without written authorization from the boss, what the everloving... And no one else, in 15 years, had even read that clause, let alone made a fuss about it.

(It got changed. I signed. The boss said he was suddenly very thankful that I was the person in charge of his contract negotiations. The end.)
[/quote]

Standard in my employment.  Overpaid with decent pension government worker.  I have to sign away all my rights to privacy every 5 years for a background update as well.

Goldielocks

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5540 on: November 12, 2016, 09:54:34 PM »
*weep*

Am I the only person who will read every word of a contract before signing it, to the great exasperation of the people who just want to get on with screwing me over??

No I read it as well, as I'm sure many in this forum do.  I was making a humor joke given this particular sub forum and thread.  I doubt the person who had a $20k loan @ 20% read it though.  You don't get loans at 20% by being financially responsible and reading over your contracts.

I know. I know so hard.

I had that argument with my boss at work, recently... realized I'd never signed an employement contract (I had a 2-page detailed offer letter that suited my purposes, so I'd never followed up on it) and it was needed for paperwork purposes so he gave me the standard template, and I refused to sign it without one change... and he said no one had ever asked for it or read it before signing. Like, WHUT. How can you not read the details of your employement contract, WTF.

For the record, what I wanted changed was a clause stating that no employee was authorized to have a second job or to work freelance contracts without the written authorization of the boss. Um, NO. I'll sign a non-compete agreement, or an agreement that I won't do freelance work in the same field or with the company's clients, sure, that's fine. But I'm not signing away my right to run an etsy store/snow shoveling business/sell eggs from my chickens/sell gift baskets/etc without written authorization from the boss, what the everloving... And no one else, in 15 years, had even read that clause, let alone made a fuss about it.

(It got changed. I signed. The boss said he was suddenly very thankful that I was the person in charge of his contract negotiations. The end.)

I have a story..

About 1 month after I was hired, HR was in the process of implementing a new hiring policy on how they check employee references pre-hire.  They were wanting to put all employees recently hired through it as well.   They were going to use a single  US firm and outsource the checks across the whole company (CANADA / US).

I read the waiver to allow them to conduct reference checks -- with former bosses, employers, schools, even with family and neighbors if they choose.  Also the financial / credit checks..    I know a lot of US companies do this, (as I had recently returned from the US and my former company installed similar programs), but Canada is pretty protective of personal privacy / rights.

I refused to sign -- why?  There was no limit on how long I was authorizing the company to investigate me.!!  WTF.  This wasn't a "once and done" type of check, and I felt that I should always be informed before/ when they check on me, and to approve it each time for a 30 day limit, that sort of thing.   i had seen this abused to check out long term employees for possible theft from company, extended sick leave, and anything slightly suspected -- all without that employee realizing.

Apparently I was one of the only people to raise concerns about it, to refuse to sign it without discussion / modification  (and I was told that most people just sign it).   

End result -- after consideration as to my reason why, they dropped the outside checks program, and kept it traditional style -in house, at the time of hire only.

Win! for checking / reading contracts!

runningthroughFIRE

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5541 on: November 14, 2016, 08:14:26 AM »
A girl I dated in high school/early college and somewhat reconnected with recently posted "God this has been a long day.  Who want to go out and get drunk with me tonight???" and then 2 days later "UGH! Does anyone know somewhere that's hiring? I need another job to make my rent this month".  She's posted multiple pictures of makeup sets as big as my desktop computer captioned #goals since then as well.
Congrats on dodging that bullet.
I was actually the dumpee in that scenario.  Blessing in disguise lol.

Per the sketchy contracts discussion: I wonder if there's a significant portion of people who either don't read a contract or read it and don't make a fuss about the sketchy parts because they don't feel like they have any negotiating power.  I certainly felt like I didn't have any authority to negotiate some parts of my employment contract when I first started working after college. My net worth was in the red via student loans, so I was willing to tolerate more in order to land a job that paid well, for example.

Warlord1986

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5542 on: November 14, 2016, 08:20:13 AM »
I was talking to a guy I served with a few days ago on FB. He's interviewing for a new job that will come with a $10,000 pay increase. He says he'll use it to pay down credit card debt. Then he'll only have a car and mortgage payment. I said I didn't like debt. He said it wasn't possible to live without debt anymore.

Then he told me he was good with money. :/

Playing with Fire UK

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5543 on: November 14, 2016, 09:19:36 AM »
Per the sketchy contracts discussion: I wonder if there's a significant portion of people who either don't read a contract or read it and don't make a fuss about the sketchy parts because they don't feel like they have any negotiating power.  I certainly felt like I didn't have any authority to negotiate some parts of my employment contract when I first started working after college. My net worth was in the red via student loans, so I was willing to tolerate more in order to land a job that paid well, for example.

This was me (not wanting to make a fuss in case the offer got pulled). I recently made a fuss with an alteration to my contract and it works out as an extra 3k a year for me. But I knew they couldn't afford to lose and I could.

mm1970

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5544 on: November 14, 2016, 10:35:20 AM »
*weep*

Am I the only person who will read every word of a contract before signing it, to the great exasperation of the people who just want to get on with screwing me over??

No I read it as well, as I'm sure many in this forum do.  I was making a humor joke given this particular sub forum and thread.  I doubt the person who had a $20k loan @ 20% read it though.  You don't get loans at 20% by being financially responsible and reading over your contracts.

I know. I know so hard.

I had that argument with my boss at work, recently... realized I'd never signed an employement contract (I had a 2-page detailed offer letter that suited my purposes, so I'd never followed up on it) and it was needed for paperwork purposes so he gave me the standard template, and I refused to sign it without one change... and he said no one had ever asked for it or read it before signing. Like, WHUT. How can you not read the details of your employement contract, WTF.

For the record, what I wanted changed was a clause stating that no employee was authorized to have a second job or to work freelance contracts without the written authorization of the boss. Um, NO. I'll sign a non-compete agreement, or an agreement that I won't do freelance work in the same field or with the company's clients, sure, that's fine. But I'm not signing away my right to run an etsy store/snow shoveling business/sell eggs from my chickens/sell gift baskets/etc without written authorization from the boss, what the everloving... And no one else, in 15 years, had even read that clause, let alone made a fuss about it.

(It got changed. I signed. The boss said he was suddenly very thankful that I was the person in charge of his contract negotiations. The end.)
When I was filling out maternity leave paperwork, our company had a "policy" that employees had to use up to 3 weeks of accrued Paid Time Off before being eligible for state disability.  Now, first, that really sucks, because you need that PTO after the kid is born, because you're gonna be sleep deprived and get sick... a LOT...that first year.  And second, you are just encouraging your employees to be spiteful and take every single day off while pregnant, to start mat leave with a "zero" bank.  If I'd done that, then I could have had off 4 weeks PTO + 22 weeks mat leave = 26 weeks.  So, six months/ half a year.

In any event, CA state law, at the time, stated that companies could require employees to take "up to 2 weeks of accrued vacation or PTO".  I refused to sign the reform until they fixed it.
In the end, that requirement fucked up my disability check anyway.  The state was horrible at the paperwork in the first place, but they were gobsmacked on how to handle the fact that my disability pay was going to start TWO WEEKS after I went on mat leave, instead of the typical one week. I didn't get my disability pay until after I went back to work, when my kid was 10 weeks old.

pachnik

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5545 on: November 14, 2016, 10:50:49 AM »
I started a Facebook account about 6 months ago to communicate with a specific real life friend who was having trouble communicating in other ways but was able to post to Facebook.   (Friend has gone out of town for treatment for a health problem).  Anyway, I got 'friended' by about a dozen people - most of whom I actually know.  However, I didn't post much to Facebook at all.   And I unfollowed half the people on there. 

I found myself comparing my every-day life with what others were posting to their Facebook accounts.  Then someone who I've never heard of jumped into my friends' list.  I had good security settings - to the best of my ability.  So I unfriended this person.   A few days later, I shut down my account.  I figured since I was not really enjoying looking at the stuff on there and was a bit concerned about security, it wasn't worth it to me.   I may revisit in the New Year if I want to start contributing to it. 

Goldielocks

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5546 on: November 14, 2016, 12:59:35 PM »
.  Then someone who I've never heard of jumped into my friends' list.  I had good security settings - to the best of my ability.  So I unfriended this person.   


Can you explain how this happened?  I am a facebook "light" user, and think that you have to accept a friend invite for them to appear -- is this not actually true?

zephyr911

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5547 on: November 14, 2016, 01:14:24 PM »
Standard in my employment.  Overpaid with decent pension government worker.  I have to sign away all my rights to privacy every 5 years for a background update as well.
Me too. Just heard my latest one finally went through after almost a year of limbo.

The good news: this should be the last time I ever have to go through that full-brain cavity search. By the time it rolls around again, I fully expect to be a millionaire, working for fun in some charity or on a DC policy team (I have weird ideas of fun). Technically I will still be a few months short of retirement eligibility from the mil reserve, but I won't have to give a shit.
I am not a cog. I am an organizational lubricant.

Dollar Slice

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5548 on: November 14, 2016, 01:21:14 PM »
.  Then someone who I've never heard of jumped into my friends' list.  I had good security settings - to the best of my ability.  So I unfriended this person.   
Can you explain how this happened?  I am a facebook "light" user, and think that you have to accept a friend invite for them to appear -- is this not actually true?

IME, it's extremely easy to accidentally click on things, especially when you're on a mobile/touchscreen device. The page will hang, you poke it a couple of times, suddenly you've sent someone a friend request without realizing it. I've done it a couple of times with total strangers.
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Apples

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Re: Overheard on Facebook
« Reply #5549 on: November 14, 2016, 01:26:59 PM »
.  Then someone who I've never heard of jumped into my friends' list.  I had good security settings - to the best of my ability.  So I unfriended this person.   


Can you explain how this happened?  I am a facebook "light" user, and think that you have to accept a friend invite for them to appear -- is this not actually true?

Possibility that one of pachnik's friends changed their name on facebook?  Other than that I've never heard of something like this.