Said dependa Facebook friend from earlier in this string posted a novella this morning. The jist of which is she cheated on her Tech Sgt husband, is pissed the husband is divorcing her and going for primary custody of the kids due to her unemployment and "anxiety", and just started a go fund me to pay for hospital bills in case the divorce goes through before she can get her heart surgery completed through Tricare (can I just insert how fucking stupid she is and how she totally doesn't realize she's looking at a six figure bill). On the positive note, shes sooooo happy to be living with her "true love" now.
Now, she'd been having overly mopey posts the past couple of months, and has been asking for money in "OMG guys I need 200 bucks by Friday if anyone has it" so I thought something was up, but holy fucking SHIT. Talk about things you SHOULDN'T be posting on the internet. She also in previous posts thinks if Trump becomes president her unemployed ass will just be given a good job, you know, since she has no degree, and near no experience she TOTALLY deserves it because she's a nice person.
This latest novella might have earned the de friend button...I didn't think that level of crazy could exist in one person.
As of today she is now "rehoming" her two schnauzers because her new boyfriends place doesn't allow dogs and her "evil" ex keeps them crated while he is at work since they "like to play when no one is around" The kicker comes from the statement of "There IS a rehoming fee and it is NOT cheap, I paid 1700 for the female 8 months ago alone". This coming from the one that has been routinely begging money for over a year.
OK, so dilemma time on this one folks. This woman yesterday has stated that she hasn't eaten in a couple of days, has been posting how she's craving hot dogs, but doesn't have any to eat or money to buy any, and she just had her heart ablation last week which means she's in recovery and not working, and was recently diagnosed with depression...her kids are also not living with her at the moment but will be visiting this week. She's asking for food donations. I could order up some groceries from the local shoprite and have her pick them up (I don't want to do a gift card as she'd probably blow it on convenience food from what I've seen).
My husband says we shouldn't do it because a lot of her current situation is caused by no one other then herself. Me, I'm seeing someone that is sick (both mentally and physically) and needs food she asked for some other things like contact lens solution, toys for her kids, and gas money that I'm not willing to hand over. But the other part of me is saying she did this to herself. She's never had a full time job, she walked out on the husband after forcing him into buying a house 4 months earlier, she's blown money on tattoos, makeup, clothes etc and has consistently bitched about being broke for years, despite her husband bringing in a pretty dang decent salary.
I feel like it's something that would be the right thing to do, someone is sick and in need, but I am afraid of setting a bad precedence. I also don't know why her family, who lives 20 minutes away from her, while I live 4 states away, isn't helping her out, which makes me leery.
What would you all do?
Sooooo this just all imploded on her, and I feel terrible and I do think I should try to do something to help but I'm not sure what an appropriate response would be (especially since I live 4 states away and haven't seen this chick in upteen years). This morning she serial posted a crap ton, the jist of which was the boyfriend she left DH for dumped her in an epic fasion, she's 3 months behind on car payments, and late on her $900 rent compiled with a "I haven't felt loved in years, he didn't even tell me why, I've said it before I'll say it again, I've hit rock bottom and it is total hell, can anyone lend me money"
After the prior food post, I had contacted her to let her know that my mom had a ton of free veggies from her garden if she wanted some (seriously my mother is offloading the stuff by the bushel). I figured it was a good compromise, she would have healthy nutritious fruit and veggies as a starting point. She turned me down even though she only lives 10 minutes from my mothers house. I also found out the guy she was dating was a veteran, and it's possible there is some PTSD in there. He's been unemployed for like a year. Now, he should be getting VA disability I thought, or been able to use the GI bill to go to school and collect the BAH in the meantime, all I got was that those weren't options, which leads me to believe he may have been discharged with a Dishonorable. I let her know about Food banks in the area after this, and told her what resources the military had available for use until the divorce is finalized, she didn't show much interest in any of it.
The part that pisses me off in all of this is the comments to the "he left me" posting. It was a bunch of hens all saying that she deserved a "man that could provide for her" "a man that can pay her bills, and feed her and the zillion pets" "a man that will love her kids" etc etc, and her agreeing with all of that (which as someone who is fiercely independent and work oriented makes me die a little inside but I can get that living off of someone else is some women's goal, my cousin being at the top of my list). That's EXACTLY what she had with DH, and apparently that didn't make her happy either?
I'll be up there this weekend to visit my mom, so part of me is wondering if I should do anything. This is all a catastrophe of her own making but my fear is that she will go suicidal, and as much as I may dislike her personal choices I wouldn't wish that upon anyone. She still hasn't said why it's not an option to go back to her parents house, and they are on FB, so they can see her posts, and none of her family have done/said anything to support her which makes me leary. And again, I've offered help in a minimal fashion, and she's turned it down since I don't think it was the "help" she's looking for so at this stage would you folks attempt to help, or just wash your hands of it all?
So I thought I would update ya'll on the latest, and probably most disgusting event (s) that have occurred with this situation over the past week. I've hit my max with her and at least unfollowed...I can't take it anymore.
So, a little background, she's back with the BF (though he doesn't seem to be treating her well), her car is now broken, needs 1k in repairs, and is about to be repossessed. Last week she had all sorts of memes posted about being broke and it being the holidays and one about how it's Christmas and it's time for all the parents to gloat with pictures of presents under the tree, and to remember that all kids aren't that lucky (PS...that was her every.single.year. before this one...I mean MOUNTAINS of toys that you could barely see the tree).
To start the jackassery off on Saturday she posted how happy she was that one of her coworkers was able to get her kids on the Toys for Tots list since she had tried and they said they were full. Said coworker volunteers there and got her on the list. Fine, whatever, her kids get some toys, no problem there.
Until yesterday when queen dependa sets up a go fund me, begging for money, saying she is having trouble getting to work since her car is dead, and how she's getting divorced and her evil ex will only bring the kids to her one day a week (dude is Active Duty military, he CAN'T drop them off and pick them up more than that she lives 45 minutes away now) but then goes on to say that more than anything she wants to give her kids a "good" Christmas, and that she's in this position even though she's "never been in a financially bad place before" which is a GIANT lie... so please send her money (READ: car is broken but I want money for MORE toys, even though Toys for Tots, the kids dad, and his whole family is also delivering Christmas).
The straw that broke the camels back for me was today, when she put out a call to "everyone who has been asking what the kids would like for Christmas" here's a list on Amazon. Out of curiosity I click the link...it's SEVEN PAGES LONG!!!. Not only that, the first TWO pages were for shit for her and her BOYFRIEND. And I'm not talking cheap shit either. She had on a 300 dollar Kitchenaid mixer, not one but TWO North Face jackets for her (200 a piece), another North Face fleece for her boy toy (120), new boots for boy toy to the tune of 150, a kitchen island for 150, a sound machine....70 DOLLAR HAIR KERATIN conditioner (listed as high priority), a waterpick toothbrush, all sorts of expensive yoga wear (and she shouldn't be wearing anything tight if you know what I mean), designer knee high socks for 20 bucks a pair, Ugg shorties, high end 15 buck a pop razors (not disposables of course) and it went on and on. Then you get to the kids stuff and it's just as bad. Multiple 100 dollar lego toys, 50 dollar animal family sets, name brand clothes and shoes etc. I total led up the 7 pages and it was over 4k of CRAP.
So to sum it up, she's broke as shit, behind on rent, broken car that might get repo'd so she's behind on payments there and instead of begging for charity to get her BILLS paid, and the car fixed so she can go to work, she wants 4k of designer shit for her, her boyfriend and her already overly spoiled children....Faith in humanity lost right there...I'm DONE.