Author Topic: Overheard at Work  (Read 9258878 times)

Sir Tom of Ato

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20700 on: August 09, 2018, 08:57:57 AM »
^^  I wish I could give them the advice to delay marriage until everyone has finished their undergrad, and likely first masters degree.

I know many people marry earlier than that.  I did, DH was not yet finished, and it is the reason for the advice -- It sets up this weird dynamic where something other than the marriage has to come first in one's life, right off the bat, and then the person with the shorter years in school (wife) ends up being the sole income earner, another challenging aspect for many guys, and especially for those who come from backgrounds where marrying early is common.

I received a lovely set of knives as a wedding present, all my university friends got together to buy me a small set of good knives.   I still use them 24 years later and think of my friends often.

That makes a lot of sense. As for me, my girlfriend and I have a vague plan of maybe 3 more years before we marry. She has an extra semester to do after I graduate, and I might end up doing a masters as well, so we aren't rushing anything.

Also, I'm glad to hear about your knives! That's exactly why I like giving them. People should be able to use them for many years, and I feel like that is the point of a wedding gift. 24 years from now they won't remember me having paid the equivalent of a meal on their honeymoon, but they could still be using the knives which cost the same amount.

Raenia

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20701 on: August 09, 2018, 09:01:00 AM »
^^  I wish I could give them the advice to delay marriage until everyone has finished their undergrad, and likely first masters degree.

I know many people marry earlier than that.  I did, DH was not yet finished, and it is the reason for the advice -- It sets up this weird dynamic where something other than the marriage has to come first in one's life, right off the bat, and then the person with the shorter years in school (wife) ends up being the sole income earner, another challenging aspect for many guys, and especially for those who come from backgrounds where marrying early is common.

I received a lovely set of knives as a wedding present, all my university friends got together to buy me a small set of good knives.   I still use them 24 years later and think of my friends often.

That makes a lot of sense. As for me, my girlfriend and I have a vague plan of maybe 3 more years before we marry. She has an extra semester to do after I graduate, and I might end up doing a masters as well, so we aren't rushing anything.

Also, I'm glad to hear about your knives! That's exactly why I like giving them. People should be able to use them for many years, and I feel like that is the point of a wedding gift. 24 years from now they won't remember me having paid the equivalent of a meal on their honeymoon, but they could still be using the knives which cost the same amount.

Another vote for good quality knives.  We asked for a very high quality bread knife on our wedding registry, and it might be my favorite gift so far - and we also got a kitchenaid mixer, rice cooker, and several other nice kitchen things.  Of course we're very grateful to the people who gave cash as well, but damn if I'm not irrationally happy every time I pick up that knife :)

SynestheticSymphony

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20702 on: August 09, 2018, 09:11:00 AM »
...but damn if I'm not irrationally happy every time I pick up that knife :)

Should this sentence scare us? XD

rockstache

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20703 on: August 09, 2018, 09:20:31 AM »
Call me the grinch, but they'll probably just return the knives and get the cash anyway. Most couples are living together and so already have what they need for the home. I don't mind giving cash for weddings. The honeymoon sounds absurd, and Disney is not my thing, but if I knew them and liked them, I'd give them what they ask for.

I married in undergrad and we did grad school married as well, and it was wonderful. Admittedly, we started college late, and we both had full time jobs and no debt the whole time, so maybe a little different than these folks. We were given a large gift to help pay for our wedding, but we didn't need it.

I do make more than my husband, and always have, but it's never been an issue (or much of a topic of discussion), so I can't really comment on that aspect.



Raenia

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20704 on: August 09, 2018, 09:23:15 AM »
...but damn if I'm not irrationally happy every time I pick up that knife :)

Should this sentence scare us? XD

Maaaaybe?  Nah, I'm sure you're fine.  I don't know where you live, after all ;D

I bake almost all of our bread from scratch, so having a good knife makes a ton of difference.  I think this is the one: [link=https://www.amazon.com/Tojiro-Bread-Slicer-270mm-F-687/dp/B004LVIO3O/ref=sr_1_4/134-9285627-2794216?ie=UTF8&qid=1533827937&sr=8-4&keywords=tojiro+bread+knife]click[/url].  Goes through like butter.  Especially after my old crummy knife, sawing through and ruining the crust.

Sir Tom of Ato

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20705 on: August 09, 2018, 10:08:18 AM »
Call me the grinch, but they'll probably just return the knives and get the cash anyway. Most couples are living together and so already have what they need for the home. I don't mind giving cash for weddings. The honeymoon sounds absurd, and Disney is not my thing, but if I knew them and liked them, I'd give them what they ask for.

I see what you're saying, but in this particular case, I know that they were both living in the dorms last year, and the guy has been renting as one of my housemates this summer, so they don't really have much in terms of household supplies for when they move in together later this month (they are both from halfway across the country as well, so it is unlikely they will be flying back here with a lot of stuff). Also, I know the guy likes cooking (I don't know his fiance very well). I just have a hard time convincing myself to give money when I know all of it will just go toward Disney World...maybe I shouldn't have asked him about that!

dragoncar

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20706 on: August 09, 2018, 10:14:42 AM »
The HR lady I spoke to in trying to get it switched strongly suggested that I make sure I'm putting at least $20/paycheck into retirement. She seemed very proud that she was putting in $50/paycheck. I directed her to @monstermonster 's book. Hopefully she'll see that she can put more away.

Wow... Are you paid weekly, at least? $50/week might get you to $1 million after 40 years...

Bi-weekly.

Ah so $100/week will get you to $2 million after 40 years not too shabby

honeybbq

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20707 on: August 09, 2018, 10:16:06 AM »
Not quite from work, but I am in college, and I have a friend (and housemate) who is getting married this summer.
He is about halfway through the 5 years for his undergrad (multiple majors), and he plans to go to grad school afterward. All good stuff, though of course it means he won't be earning much for a number of years at least, and then he will definitely have loans.

His educational aspirations aren't what I am writing here about, though. The other week, he mentioned his honeymoon plans. His soon-to-be wife apparently really wants to go to Disney World, and so their (presumably) week-long honeymoon will be at Disney World. But they aren't just paying for that. They are staying in one of the actual Disney World hotels. He mentioned the name which I then looked up, and it costs WELL OVER $900 PER NIGHT. That means they will definitely be spending a minimum of $1,000 per day for their honeymoon at a crowded park, if you count the overpriced food and entrance fees.

Now, he also just bought a car (used, cheap, and good condition at least), and I happen to know that his summer job made him enough money for rent, utilities, food, and I guess that car, but not much else. His future wife does not have a job yet, that I am aware of.

So I went to their wedding registry website to see what kind of gifts they were looking for (maybe a nice set of kitchen knives? I like giving people those lol), and it basically said "we don't want gifts, we want your money" but nicer. I asked my friend about it, and he told me "yeah, we are basically going to use all of the money we get at our wedding to help offset the cost of the honeymoon."

I think I'll get him the kitchen knives.

Isn't valuing an experience over stuff an important concept though? (given, this is totally a ridiculous experience given their financial/job status)

I totally like the way the trend is going to give money instead of *things*... but that's just me.

PS. I did get a lovely ceramic knife for Xmas once from a sibling. It started my new love affair with ceramic knives...

Sir Tom of Ato

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20708 on: August 09, 2018, 10:30:14 AM »
Isn't valuing an experience over stuff an important concept though? (given, this is totally a ridiculous experience given their financial/job status)

I totally like the way the trend is going to give money instead of *things*... but that's just me.

PS. I did get a lovely ceramic knife for Xmas once from a sibling. It started my new love affair with ceramic knives...

True. I don't want to devalue the experience for them. I guess it is just hard for me to swallow the fact that my hypothetical money contribution, along with the contributions of all my friends, are just going to end up paying for some hotel...
« Last Edit: August 09, 2018, 10:32:45 AM by Sir Tom of Ato »

marcela

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20709 on: August 09, 2018, 10:32:49 AM »
The HR lady I spoke to in trying to get it switched strongly suggested that I make sure I'm putting at least $20/paycheck into retirement. She seemed very proud that she was putting in $50/paycheck. I directed her to @monstermonster 's book. Hopefully she'll see that she can put more away.

Wow... Are you paid weekly, at least? $50/week might get you to $1 million after 40 years...
Bi-weekly.
Hey not everyone needs a million to retire! Perhaps she makes in the $20,000 annual salary range, so she's saving 6% of her salary... or is focused on paying off debt, or some other goal. Or maybe she needs a little help to do the math.

I don't know about any debt she might be paying off, but she makes in the 50k range (our salaries are public info) and I see her going on a lot of vacations/ to concerts..etc. Goes out for lunch everyday too. Hopefully, she takes some of what I said to heart and it helps her.

Slee_stack

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20710 on: August 09, 2018, 10:32:58 AM »
CW1 just bought a fancy new car.  Probably a slightly above average cost one.

I've spoken to CW1 in the past and they readily admit they should know more and be better about spending, but just can't do it.  They are smart technically but intentionally bury their heads in the sand regarding money.  I've tried to to convey some basic suggestions, but its 'too hard'.   Its frustrating.  These willfully ignorant types tick me off down the road when their hands outstretch for help.

CW2 brought up CW1 and talked excitedly about the new car.  I told CW2 it would have been nice if CW1 could have at least found a nice few years old car.

CW2 explained...well you HAVE to buy a first NEW car sometime.

Someone else here just rolled in with a new 'track' version corvette or something.  Its amazing how much money is sitting in our parking lot.

A lot of very smart, remarkably idiotic people here.  More than a few even recognize their poor habits yet keep on keeping on.

Goldielocks

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20711 on: August 09, 2018, 10:38:09 AM »


I do make more than my husband, and always have, but it's never been an issue (or much of a topic of discussion), so I can't really comment on that aspect.

The weirdness in pay is partly from DH earning ZERO, for more than year, and living off the wife's (low, because first "career" role) income.

I found that a differential in income, even if fairly large, matters less as people age, and if they have been earning their respective incomes for a while before getting together, because a low income is still self supporting / validating.  That's different from a student virtual "ZERO" income for an extended period of time. 

Sir Tom -- I agree that pooled money gifts are not great.   There is zero memory of the people attached to the gift.  It just avoids bad gifts, is all.   I do give cash at weddings, but usually for people that I don't know very well personally, or well enough to buy a gift for, or logistically I don't see them normally, and can't physically get an actual gift to them, so money at the reception is a lot easier for everyone.

I'm a red panda

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20712 on: August 09, 2018, 10:48:22 AM »


I do make more than my husband, and always have, but it's never been an issue (or much of a topic of discussion), so I can't really comment on that aspect.

The weirdness in pay is partly from DH earning ZERO, for more than year, and living off the wife's (low, because first "career" role) income.


We've been in this situation a few times; both with my husband not working and me not working. It's never been weird at all. Our marriage has always been a partnership with pooled resources- who makes the money is of zero consideration. There has always been a reason for no income (student, recently laid off, medical, haven't found a new job after a move, etc) - neither of us ever didn't work out of laziness. 

Prairie Stash

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20713 on: August 09, 2018, 12:34:25 PM »
Isn't valuing an experience over stuff an important concept though? (given, this is totally a ridiculous experience given their financial/job status)

I totally like the way the trend is going to give money instead of *things*... but that's just me.

PS. I did get a lovely ceramic knife for Xmas once from a sibling. It started my new love affair with ceramic knives...

True. I don't want to devalue the experience for them. I guess it is just hard for me to swallow the fact that my hypothetical money contribution, along with the contributions of all my friends, are just going to end up paying for some hotel...
Get over it, they'll be returning the knives for cash. Giving them knives is just an inconvenience, you accomplish nothing but annoyance for the sake of feeling smug.

The entire point of the registry is to avoid the gaffe you are committing. Now they have to feign a smile and do an awkward thank you for something they didn't desire at this point; don't be a jerk and tell them how they'll appreciate it in the future either. Have you ever received a gift you didn't want? Like wool socks when you're five, five year olds don't want socks, they want toys and games (I want wool socks, but I'm old). I give my five year old socks because thats how kids learn to feign smiles so they can avoid creating scenes in the future when unwitting gift givers think the world should conform to their values and not to the recipient. Don't worry, she still gets toys (I'm not a real ginch).

Its still an idea I dislike (an overly expensive honeymoon, ugh), but don't compound the errors. We can teach people to become mustachian, don't force it on them.

Jouer

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20714 on: August 09, 2018, 12:48:36 PM »
Isn't valuing an experience over stuff an important concept though? (given, this is totally a ridiculous experience given their financial/job status)

I totally like the way the trend is going to give money instead of *things*... but that's just me.

PS. I did get a lovely ceramic knife for Xmas once from a sibling. It started my new love affair with ceramic knives...

True. I don't want to devalue the experience for them. I guess it is just hard for me to swallow the fact that my hypothetical money contribution, along with the contributions of all my friends, are just going to end up paying for some hotel...

When giving a present, it's not about what you value/want. It's what the giftee values/wants.

solon

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20715 on: August 09, 2018, 01:17:40 PM »
Isn't valuing an experience over stuff an important concept though? (given, this is totally a ridiculous experience given their financial/job status)

I totally like the way the trend is going to give money instead of *things*... but that's just me.

PS. I did get a lovely ceramic knife for Xmas once from a sibling. It started my new love affair with ceramic knives...

True. I don't want to devalue the experience for them. I guess it is just hard for me to swallow the fact that my hypothetical money contribution, along with the contributions of all my friends, are just going to end up paying for some hotel...

When giving a present, it's not about what you value/want. It's what the giftee values/wants.


Sir Tom of Ato

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20716 on: August 09, 2018, 01:25:04 PM »
When giving a present, it's not about what you value/want. It's what the giftee values/wants.

...Its still an idea I dislike (an overly expensive honeymoon, ugh), but don't compound the errors. We can teach people to become mustachian, don't force it on them.

Wow I guess I hadn't really thought about it this way...hmmm. Now I'm conflicted...I suppose I will have to think some more before I make a decision. Maybe I should give them some money and just a single really big knife :)


gooki

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20717 on: August 10, 2018, 03:40:54 AM »
That's a bit murdery.

Imma

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20718 on: August 10, 2018, 02:59:31 PM »
One thing I don't get at all are big weddings with honeymoons and big gifts and a wedding registry etc. Although I've personally never been to a wedding like that, in our social circle people tend to have really low-key weddings. I only hear other people's horror stories. Half of people get divorced anyway, and sometimes I think that there might be a correlation between big expensive weddings and divorce statistics.


LennStar

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20719 on: August 11, 2018, 12:26:42 AM »
One thing I don't get at all are big weddings with honeymoons and big gifts and a wedding registry etc. Although I've personally never been to a wedding like that, in our social circle people tend to have really low-key weddings. I only hear other people's horror stories. Half of people get divorced anyway, and sometimes I think that there might be a correlation between big expensive weddings and divorce statistics.

There is. 

http://www.blackdragonblog.com/2015/01/25/expensive-wedding-higher-odds-divorce/

MissNancyPryor

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20720 on: August 11, 2018, 01:05:35 PM »
Feeling mildly guilty about judging here, but here goes:

Nice fellow at work leaves the parking garage behind me and notices that I have a different car than he remembers.  I notice he also has something different in my rear view mirror but think nothing of it, whatever.  Nice fellow wants to tell me about his new car though so he uses the chance encounter to ask about my car and I reciprocate with the question about his. 

My car:  2015 Honda CR-V bought in January 2018 at the Alfa Romeo dealership.  They had it as a trade-in sitting on their lot since September 2017 with only 15K miles and I snapped it up for cash at a great price, and it has all the premo stuff.  I got rid of the car I had been driving for 9 years up to this point which had also been bought as a 5YO used car (it was a 2004 model I bought for cash in 2009). 

His car:  2018 Alfa Romeo Stelvio, coincidenally bought at the same dealership this month.  He ordered it special and it has all the premo stuff.  Payments.  He is 60 and will be working a while longer since he is aiming for the company pension and SS as he knows you are expected to do, no thought of any other plan.

He seems very content and is pleased as punch about his car, just absolutely loves it.  I see the same car and it makes my skin crawl, I just couldn't do that with my money, but I nodded with enthusiasm and didn't question the choice at all.  Not my business.  The guy talks about wanting to retire now and again but is not a big complainer so I think he is living the life he wants. 

But to me the difference is so stark when you compare goals and life plans and habits of consumption.  The fact that we bought the cars at the exact same dealership with drastically different mindsets is interesting indeed.  It makes me wonder if there will be a shadow of doubt crossing his mind about the choice when I leave as an extremely early retiree and he is still there.  Probably not though.             

markbike528CBX

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20721 on: August 11, 2018, 04:31:59 PM »
I hope it was the Quadrifoglio 505hp, otherwise it is the same as the CR-V ( a nice, but sort of generic SUV/crossover)

MissNancyPryor

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20722 on: August 11, 2018, 04:39:57 PM »
Not totally sure if he went full hog and got that or just got the Lusso AWD.  He was commenting that he went on a long road trip down to Dusty (you know where that is, neighbor of mine) and the thing had some serious hunker down mode that meant he barely had to pay attention while it hugged the curves of the Palouse.  Sounded like a very fun ride except for the drag created by the payment book flapping the breeze behind him ;-)


markbike528CBX

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20723 on: August 11, 2018, 04:59:28 PM »
I've only been through Dusty once or twice, and didn't remember it, had to do a google map lookup.

I can visualize the flapping payment book.  Nice turn of phrase.

dragoncar

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20724 on: August 11, 2018, 09:50:58 PM »
Not totally sure if he went full hog and got that or just got the Lusso AWD.  He was commenting that he went on a long road trip down to Dusty (you know where that is, neighbor of mine) and the thing had some serious hunker down mode that meant he barely had to pay attention while it hugged the curves of the Palouse.  Sounded like a very fun ride except for the drag created by the payment book flapping the breeze behind him ;-)

Wtf is a hunker down mode?

Just Joe

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20725 on: August 12, 2018, 05:17:18 PM »
Feeling mildly guilty about judging here, but here goes:

Nice fellow at work leaves the parking garage behind me and notices that I have a different car than he remembers.  I notice he also has something different in my rear view mirror but think nothing of it, whatever.  Nice fellow wants to tell me about his new car though so he uses the chance encounter to ask about my car and I reciprocate with the question about his. 

My car:  2015 Honda CR-V bought in January 2018 at the Alfa Romeo dealership.  They had it as a trade-in sitting on their lot since September 2017 with only 15K miles and I snapped it up for cash at a great price, and it has all the premo stuff.  I got rid of the car I had been driving for 9 years up to this point which had also been bought as a 5YO used car (it was a 2004 model I bought for cash in 2009). 

His car:  2018 Alfa Romeo Stelvio, coincidenally bought at the same dealership this month.  He ordered it special and it has all the premo stuff.  Payments.  He is 60 and will be working a while longer since he is aiming for the company pension and SS as he knows you are expected to do, no thought of any other plan.

He seems very content and is pleased as punch about his car, just absolutely loves it.  I see the same car and it makes my skin crawl, I just couldn't do that with my money, but I nodded with enthusiasm and didn't question the choice at all.  Not my business.  The guy talks about wanting to retire now and again but is not a big complainer so I think he is living the life he wants. 

But to me the difference is so stark when you compare goals and life plans and habits of consumption.  The fact that we bought the cars at the exact same dealership with drastically different mindsets is interesting indeed.  It makes me wonder if there will be a shadow of doubt crossing his mind about the choice when I leave as an extremely early retiree and he is still there.  Probably not though.           

Did you buy his trade-in?

nick663

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20726 on: August 12, 2018, 05:53:01 PM »
Not totally sure if he went full hog and got that or just got the Lusso AWD.  He was commenting that he went on a long road trip down to Dusty (you know where that is, neighbor of mine) and the thing had some serious hunker down mode that meant he barely had to pay attention while it hugged the curves of the Palouse.  Sounded like a very fun ride except for the drag created by the payment book flapping the breeze behind him ;-)

Wtf is a hunker down mode?
I assume he was referring to some kind of sport mode.  Not familiar with the Alfa but most higher end vehicles have semi active or active dampers with tunes that can completely change the character of the vehicle.

Just Joe

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20727 on: August 13, 2018, 09:56:36 AM »
Some of these cars will also lower the suspension when they are put into sport mode. Don't know if the Alfa-Romeos have this feature.

Dragonswan

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20728 on: August 13, 2018, 11:06:28 AM »
Not totally sure if he went full hog and got that or just got the Lusso AWD.  He was commenting that he went on a long road trip down to Dusty (you know where that is, neighbor of mine) and the thing had some serious hunker down mode that meant he barely had to pay attention while it hugged the curves of the Palouse.  Sounded like a very fun ride except for the drag created by the payment book flapping the breeze behind him ;-)

Wtf is a hunker down mode?
It's what sports cars do to avoid detection by lusty dragons.

dragoncar

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20729 on: August 13, 2018, 11:28:21 AM »
Not totally sure if he went full hog and got that or just got the Lusso AWD.  He was commenting that he went on a long road trip down to Dusty (you know where that is, neighbor of mine) and the thing had some serious hunker down mode that meant he barely had to pay attention while it hugged the curves of the Palouse.  Sounded like a very fun ride except for the drag created by the payment book flapping the breeze behind him ;-)

Wtf is a hunker down mode?
It's what sports cars do to avoid detection by lusty dragons.


Steeze

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20730 on: August 13, 2018, 12:23:28 PM »
Coworker age 65 recently spoke to me about not being able to retire for another 5 years or so as he need the max SS benefits due to very little savings  and only a small pension of a few hundred dollars a month. He has been an engineer for over 40 years.

Today he asked our HR person for (another) 401k loan to pay for his 13 year old dog's intestine surgery. This is the second such request this year, with vet bills now over $15k.

Dragonswan

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20731 on: August 13, 2018, 01:01:08 PM »
Not totally sure if he went full hog and got that or just got the Lusso AWD.  He was commenting that he went on a long road trip down to Dusty (you know where that is, neighbor of mine) and the thing had some serious hunker down mode that meant he barely had to pay attention while it hugged the curves of the Palouse.  Sounded like a very fun ride except for the drag created by the payment book flapping the breeze behind him ;-)

Wtf is a hunker down mode?
It's what sports cars do to avoid detection by lusty dragons.


Mmhmm.  Some of them will even wrap themselves in chrome-like vinyl (to the tune of 6K) so when they slink around corners the sun will reflect off the coating and blind and/or disorient the dragon.  If you're really determined you can try their proving grounds where they are known to frolic by drag racing or catch one separated from the herd as it pulls out of the temperature controlled garage of a McMansion.

Rightflyer

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20732 on: August 14, 2018, 12:59:22 PM »
Coworker age 65 recently spoke to me about not being able to retire for another 5 years or so as he need the max SS benefits due to very little savings  and only a small pension of a few hundred dollars a month. He has been an engineer for over 40 years.

Today he asked our HR person for (another) 401k loan to pay for his 13 year old dog's intestine surgery. This is the second such request this year, with vet bills now over $15k.

Thank you for calming the foam...


talltexan

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20733 on: August 15, 2018, 12:12:41 PM »
There is a starbucks near our workplace, so it's not strange to see their products around our office floor. But lately it seems like a bunch of the younger co-workers are walking around with Starbucks Water. It's in the same plastic cup with long green straw, but it's...water?!?

I'm a red panda

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20734 on: August 15, 2018, 12:19:32 PM »
There is a starbucks near our workplace, so it's not strange to see their products around our office floor. But lately it seems like a bunch of the younger co-workers are walking around with Starbucks Water. It's in the same plastic cup with long green straw, but it's...water?!?

Are they refilling their cups from a previous purchase to use at work?

Starbucks gives you tap water for free. Some charge 30 cents or so for the cup though.

marcela

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20735 on: August 15, 2018, 12:58:10 PM »
There is a starbucks near our workplace, so it's not strange to see their products around our office floor. But lately it seems like a bunch of the younger co-workers are walking around with Starbucks Water. It's in the same plastic cup with long green straw, but it's...water?!?

Are they refilling their cups from a previous purchase to use at work?

Starbucks gives you tap water for free. Some charge 30 cents or so for the cup though.
That would have been me at my old workplace. We had a lot of breaks where everyone would go down to the neighbouring Starbucks and I would go along to stretch my legs and generally got water. I never was charged. Probably because my coworkers were spending so much.

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20736 on: August 15, 2018, 07:26:17 PM »
Not totally sure if he went full hog and got that or just got the Lusso AWD.  He was commenting that he went on a long road trip down to Dusty (you know where that is, neighbor of mine) and the thing had some serious hunker down mode that meant he barely had to pay attention while it hugged the curves of the Palouse.  Sounded like a very fun ride except for the drag created by the payment book flapping the breeze behind him ;-)

Wtf is a hunker down mode?
It's what sports cars do to avoid detection by lusty dragons.


Mmhmm.  Some of them will even wrap themselves in chrome-like vinyl (to the tune of 6K) so when they slink around corners the sun will reflect off the coating and blind and/or disorient the dragon.  If you're really determined you can try their proving grounds where they are known to frolic by drag racing or catch one separated from the herd as it pulls out of the temperature controlled garage of a McMansion.

 Finally, an explanation of the Citroën.

Linea_Norway

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20737 on: August 16, 2018, 07:00:43 AM »
There is a starbucks near our workplace, so it's not strange to see their products around our office floor. But lately it seems like a bunch of the younger co-workers are walking around with Starbucks Water. It's in the same plastic cup with long green straw, but it's...water?!?

Are they refilling their cups from a previous purchase to use at work?

Starbucks gives you tap water for free. Some charge 30 cents or so for the cup though.
That would have been me at my old workplace. We had a lot of breaks where everyone would go down to the neighbouring Starbucks and I would go along to stretch my legs and generally got water. I never was charged. Probably because my coworkers were spending so much.

In my old workplace there was a coffee selling place nearby as well. Some colleagues would buy the fancy coffee for the group of coffee drinkers and with that morally compel the group members to do the same thing back next time.

marcela

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20738 on: August 16, 2018, 07:22:09 AM »
There is a starbucks near our workplace, so it's not strange to see their products around our office floor. But lately it seems like a bunch of the younger co-workers are walking around with Starbucks Water. It's in the same plastic cup with long green straw, but it's...water?!?

Are they refilling their cups from a previous purchase to use at work?

Starbucks gives you tap water for free. Some charge 30 cents or so for the cup though.
That would have been me at my old workplace. We had a lot of breaks where everyone would go down to the neighbouring Starbucks and I would go along to stretch my legs and generally got water. I never was charged. Probably because my coworkers were spending so much.

In my old workplace there was a coffee selling place nearby as well. Some colleagues would buy the fancy coffee for the group of coffee drinkers and with that morally compel the group members to do the same thing back next time.
It was mostly a group of broke interns so there was no buying rounds happening. For some of them, that "coffee" was their dinner. Ah, to be 19 and working in the arts...

Michael in ABQ

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20739 on: August 18, 2018, 09:47:07 PM »
I work in the federal government and am helping my boss out with reviewing resumes for a new hire. I'm a GS-11 which has a base salary of about $62,000. The position being advertised is also a GS-11 but two people who applied made far more so my boss called them to find out why they applied for a job with much lower pay. One guy was in a HCOL area and wanted to be closer to family in our LCOL area. The second guy was local and worked for a different federal agency as a GS-12 making $94,000. When we called him to find out why he was willing to take such a dramatic pay cut he said he thought he could get the job bumped up to GS-12 and basically match his current salary. When my boss informed him that wasn't going to be possible he mentioned he had three kids in college and had just bought three new cars so he couldn't afford a pay cut.


I don't know if he meant three new (used) cars or three brand new cars but WTF. Maybe his kids got a lot of scholarships or his wife has a good income as well but I can't imagine buying one brand new car, let alone three at the same time.

SpareChange

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20740 on: August 19, 2018, 11:40:24 AM »
Coworker age 65 recently spoke to me about not being able to retire for another 5 years or so as he need the max SS benefits due to very little savings  and only a small pension of a few hundred dollars a month. He has been an engineer for over 40 years.

Today he asked our HR person for (another) 401k loan to pay for his 13 year old dog's intestine surgery. This is the second such request this year, with vet bills now over $15k.

Yikes.

KodeBlue

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20741 on: August 19, 2018, 12:46:06 PM »
Today he asked our HR person for (another) 401k loan to pay for his 13 year old dog's intestine surgery. This is the second such request this year, with vet bills now over $15k.

As an animal lover and owner of 3 dogs it always pisses me off when I hear about people subjecting a dog or cat to multiple procedures to prolong thier life. So many times times it just prolongs the animal's suffering. I don't care if you have $10M; at some point you need to do what's best for the pet. This might mean letting go and not letting them stay alive but miserable. <end rant>

frugledoc

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20742 on: August 19, 2018, 03:36:42 PM »
Today he asked our HR person for (another) 401k loan to pay for his 13 year old dog's intestine surgery. This is the second such request this year, with vet bills now over $15k.

As an animal lover and owner of 3 dogs it always pisses me off when I hear about people subjecting a dog or cat to multiple procedures to prolong thier life. So many times times it just prolongs the animal's suffering. I don't care if you have $10M; at some point you need to do what's best for the pet. This might mean letting go and not letting them stay alive but miserable. <end rant>

Same could be said for humans :)

Sun Hat

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20743 on: August 19, 2018, 05:26:14 PM »
What sort of obligation, if any, do you feel to caution your friends or "work friends" about the consequences of their profligacy? A former colleague of mine is about to be medically released from the military where she earns about $80k/year. Insurance will provide her with 75% of her previous pay for 2 years, then she'll get a pension worth about $30k/year. She's amassed over $40K in consumer debt while earning $80k, so she needs to adjust her lifestyle - but doesn't see the need.

She has little home equity, a high school education, has moved back to a community with high unemployment, and has pegged her financial future on Veterans' Affairs reconsidering a claim that they've already denied, and plans to sell movie ideas to Netflix. She has few transferable skills and a condition that causes her to be in chronic pain, so her employment prospects are very limited.

She could fix her situation by using the insurance money to pay off her debts if she slashes her spending now, but how do I point her to the right path without telling her that her plans tantamount to magical thinking? Even though we don't have much in common, she's a sweet person, and I don't think that she has anyone else in her life to point her on a less destructive path. What to do?

Freedomin5

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20744 on: August 19, 2018, 05:42:24 PM »
What sort of obligation, if any, do you feel to caution your friends or "work friends" about the consequences of their profligacy? A former colleague of mine is about to be medically released from the military where she earns about $80k/year. Insurance will provide her with 75% of her previous pay for 2 years, then she'll get a pension worth about $30k/year. She's amassed over $40K in consumer debt while earning $80k, so she needs to adjust her lifestyle - but doesn't see the need.

She has little home equity, a high school education, has moved back to a community with high unemployment, and has pegged her financial future on Veterans' Affairs reconsidering a claim that they've already denied, and plans to sell movie ideas to Netflix. She has few transferable skills and a condition that causes her to be in chronic pain, so her employment prospects are very limited.

She could fix her situation by using the insurance money to pay off her debts if she slashes her spending now, but how do I point her to the right path without telling her that her plans tantamount to magical thinking? Even though we don't have much in common, she's a sweet person, and I don't think that she has anyone else in her life to point her on a less destructive path. What to do?

@Sun Hat  If she is a good friend, I’d just invite her out for a meal to catch up, casually ask about her upcoming plans now that her discharge is imminent, and then show her the math. While her Plan A is to have the VA reconsider her claim, I’d ask her what her Plan B was “just in case” VA denied her claim.
« Last Edit: August 19, 2018, 05:45:49 PM by Freedomin5 »

The Fake Cheap

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20745 on: August 19, 2018, 06:08:54 PM »
One thing I don't get at all are big weddings with honeymoons and big gifts and a wedding registry etc. Although I've personally never been to a wedding like that, in our social circle people tend to have really low-key weddings. I only hear other people's horror stories. Half of people get divorced anyway, and sometimes I think that there might be a correlation between big expensive weddings and divorce statistics.

There is. 

http://www.blackdragonblog.com/2015/01/25/expensive-wedding-higher-odds-divorce/

It is a theory of mine that the correlation exists because the people are married and get along only while the money is flowing.  Once the trips down south, the new cars, trailers, and new iPhone purchases stop because the credit cards are maxed and the line of credit is tapped, the people realize that they don't really enjoy their partner, and were only getting along/having fun with him/her while there was money to burn.

Alfred J Quack

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20746 on: August 20, 2018, 01:37:33 AM »
One thing I don't get at all are big weddings with honeymoons and big gifts and a wedding registry etc. Although I've personally never been to a wedding like that, in our social circle people tend to have really low-key weddings. I only hear other people's horror stories. Half of people get divorced anyway, and sometimes I think that there might be a correlation between big expensive weddings and divorce statistics.

There is. 

http://www.blackdragonblog.com/2015/01/25/expensive-wedding-higher-odds-divorce/

Does the inverse hold true as well? We had a €500,- wedding!

Kyle Schuant

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20747 on: August 20, 2018, 02:43:11 AM »
how do I point her to the right path without telling her that her plans tantamount to magical thinking?
You set your own example, and talk it about enthusiastically. That probably won't work, but it has the best chance of working while not causing a rift between you and her as she gets offended that Netflix isn't going to pay her millions.

USD60k for 2 years followed by USD30k for life without having to work for it is actually pretty good if she lives in a low cost-of-living area. Let's say she lives on 25k,

Yr1: 60k income, 25k spending, debt 40k-->5k
Yr2: 60k income, 25k spending, debt 5k -->0k, savings 0k-->25k.
Yr3 and thereafter, 30k income, 5k spending, savings 25k+5k pa.

That's not huge savings but if she's receiving some sort of disability pension from her military service then she will have zero medical costs, so her savings can be for small investments, hobbies, or travel.

But she almost certainly won't do it. People don't engage in magical thinking for just a year or two out of nowhere and then stop, it's a lifelong practice. Digging further, you'll find similar thinking throughout her life, let me guess: is she also single and dreaming of a 6'4" handsome rich charming educated man who sweeps her off her feet one day? So when I say that you should discuss your own example in a conversational way, that's not in expectation of any positive change on her part as a result, but just so you can get it out of your system.

Sun Hat

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20748 on: August 20, 2018, 06:54:10 AM »
Thanks for the feedback @Kyle Schuant and @Freedomin5.

One of the few things that my friend and I have in common is that we're both women who were/will be medically released from the military. Our pensions will even be of a pretty similar amount. For me, the 70% reduction in income wasn't a big impact to my daily spending, as I had been saving over 60% of my pay anyways, so I just downsized from my almost-paid for home to a totally paid for home and called it a day. Kyle Schuant is right, hers is a lifetime of magical thinking and poor financial management. Fortunately, we're Canadian, so medical costs aren't a significant factor.

I think that Freedomin5's suggestion of asking about her Plan B is a good one, and far more tactful than anything that I could have come up with on my own. Unfortunately, I won't get to see her face to face, since I only saw her while she was passing through my city enroute her retirement destination and she was traveling with her 14 year old daughter, and I didn't want to shake her by the collar and call her crazy in front of her kid, so I just smiled and nodded when she told me her situation. I'll have to make my query by email.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #20749 on: August 20, 2018, 06:59:04 AM »
... but how do I point her to the right path without telling her that her plans tantamount to magical thinking? Even though we don't have much in common, she's a sweet person, and I don't think that she has anyone else in her life to point her on a less destructive path. What to do?
I'm not very good at this, but I've seen others employ this method to great effect:  ask questions.  Don't (outwardly) judge them or say that they're in dreamland.  Ask the questions that will force them to actually think through their future.  Freedomin5 is on the right track--ask what plan B is.  Ask how much it'll cost to live in her new place.  Ask what kind of jobs are available there.  Ask how she sees her life in 5 years.  Ask the "what if" questions.  Ask her what makes her think the VA will reconsider the previously-denied claim.  Ask her what her actual spending is (does she even know?).