Author Topic: Overheard at Work  (Read 8053662 times)

BlueHouse

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2450 on: April 24, 2014, 01:24:00 PM »
This is why James Randi is offering $1 Million to anyone who can demonstrate the superiority of their expensive digital cables over cheap ones, and why no one has taken him up on it yet.
I love James Randi.  Ever see his TV specials on pseudo-sciences, astrology, ESP, etc?  Fantastic. 

Back to topic, I worked with a girl who got stuck making monthly payments for her husband's ex-wife's engagement ring.  Honestly, she knew what she was getting into with him.  A few days before her wedding she admitted that she no longer wanted to marry him, but she decided to just go through with it and then divorce him "in about a year".  That wedding must have cost over $80K, and it was a great party, but I just couldn't really enjoy myself because I knew she wasn't going to be happy after that day. 
Sometimes nothing can be a real cool hand

FIreDrill

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2451 on: April 24, 2014, 01:32:32 PM »
This is why James Randi is offering $1 Million to anyone who can demonstrate the superiority of their expensive digital cables over cheap ones, and why no one has taken him up on it yet.
I love James Randi.  Ever see his TV specials on pseudo-sciences, astrology, ESP, etc?  Fantastic. 

Back to topic, I worked with a girl who got stuck making monthly payments for her husband's ex-wife's engagement ring.  Honestly, she knew what she was getting into with him.  A few days before her wedding she admitted that she no longer wanted to marry him, but she decided to just go through with it and then divorce him "in about a year".  That wedding must have cost over $80K, and it was a great party, but I just couldn't really enjoy myself because I knew she wasn't going to be happy after that day.

8-0

That's so messed up...

ichangedmyname

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2452 on: April 24, 2014, 01:37:20 PM »
In a meeting one of our managers mentioned our 401k and asked if anyone's participating. A few people including me raised our hands. Probably 5 out of 30 people. The manager urged the rest to start because it's free money. I agreed.

One guy sitting close to me said in a whisper, "My paycheck would be less. I fail to see how that is free money."
http://luxefrugality.wordpress.com/ ~ where I share my journey to FIRE and Mustachianism and comments are appreciated ~

frugledoc

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2453 on: April 24, 2014, 01:57:11 PM »
This is why James Randi is offering $1 Million to anyone who can demonstrate the superiority of their expensive digital cables over cheap ones, and why no one has taken him up on it yet.
I love James Randi.  Ever see his TV specials on pseudo-sciences, astrology, ESP, etc?  Fantastic. 

Back to topic, I worked with a girl who got stuck making monthly payments for her husband's ex-wife's engagement ring.  Honestly, she knew what she was getting into with him.  A few days before her wedding she admitted that she no longer wanted to marry him, but she decided to just go through with it and then divorce him "in about a year".  That wedding must have cost over $80K, and it was a great party, but I just couldn't really enjoy myself because I knew she wasn't going to be happy after that day.

What a bxxch

wauske

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2454 on: April 24, 2014, 02:04:40 PM »
Digital signals transmit information differently. On digital signals information is transmitted either as a high voltage, a "1", or a low voltage, a "0". There must be some form of tiny computer at each end to encode / decode the information into / from the stream of 1's and 0's. There can be almost any amount of noise introduced along the way; as long as the receiving computer is able to distinguish between a 1 or a 0 then no information is lost or added. High-quality connectors and cables are not important for digital signals; either the amount of noise is large enough that it overwrites the signal (in which case nothing will work) or it's not (in which case everything will work perfectly). Examples of digital signals are CD / DVD / Blu-ray, HDMI or DVI cables, digital TV channels, USB, Ethernet, optical sound cables, and pretty much every other form of computer cable.

This is why CDs do not wear down and their sound quality doesn't degrade over time, like records do. Either the CD perfectly (up to the format's limits) reproduces the sound or it's scratched and can't be read at all. Either the video / sound quality from a digital TV channel is perfect, or it's completely messed up as long as the branch (or whatever) is blocking the signal. There's no fuzzy sound or fuzzy picture like their use to be for analog TV channels with less-than-perfect reception.

If a $5 HDMI cable works at all then it will produce exactly the same picture quality as a $100 HDMI cable. The marketing people are merely lying and scamming you. This is why James Randi is offering $1 Million to anyone who can demonstrate the superiority of their expensive digital cables over cheap ones, and why no one has taken him up on it yet.

What you say is correct but not entirely complete, a low quality cable can also suffer from noise and/or crosstalk which may degrade signal quality. Correction may be applied up to a point but when noise is too great you may experience that the picture/audio is jittery. Also, it is quite possible that only lower resolutions can be displayed due to the fact that higher displays demand higher throughput which cannot be achieved.
Low quality cables can especially be a problem for longer distances (10ft or more). So if you have the chance, buy a cable with money back guarantee so that you can test it!

On topic:
I met an engineer who was performing maintenance at our site. We got talking about kids and finances and eventually the topic of mortgages came up. He appeared to be like minded so I told him how far I was with paying it down. It was quite annoying when he said that his mortgage was about half of mine :D
Everything I say is my personal opinion which is based on my subjective experience.

BlueHouse

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2455 on: April 24, 2014, 02:31:24 PM »
What a bxxch
I didn't think so.  I thought it was a misguided way to avoid conflict and to save the embarrassment of telling everyone the wedding was cancelled.  After all, the guy came out WAY ahead -- his debt was paid off by the girl's father, and I'm pretty sure her dad ended up giving him money to walk away.  Perhaps you assumed the guy made more than she did and she was making the decision based on money?   

Or did you mean me for attending a sham wedding? 
Sometimes nothing can be a real cool hand

the fixer

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2456 on: April 24, 2014, 02:48:13 PM »
wauske is right. If cable quality didn't matter, data centers would be using Category 3 ethernet cabling, non-twisted-pair, everywhere instead of 5a/6/fiber. On the receiving end of a cable, you either get a 1 or a 0, but it might not be the same thing that the sender tried to transmit for various reasons (EMI, crosstalk). In most cables this happens randomly, not for every bit, and this leads to a nonzero error rate. There are more than two states for a cable: it can work perfectly, it can be totally useless, or it can be somewhere in between with an error rate. There are ways to design digital cables to lessen interference and crosstalk, which in turn reduces error rates at a given data transfer rate.

In practice, most cables are made to conform to specific standards that have been found to provide good performance at normal cable lengths without an unacceptably high rate of errors. HDMI cables fall into this category; a manufacturer cannot call a cable an HDMI cable unless they meet the standard and pass certain testing the standards body requires. So yes, there is no appreciable difference between HDMI cables. But no, in the general case any cable won't always do when it comes to digital signals.

dragoncar

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2457 on: April 24, 2014, 03:11:31 PM »
wauske is right. If cable quality didn't matter, data centers would be using Category 3 ethernet cabling, non-twisted-pair, everywhere instead of 5a/6/fiber. On the receiving end of a cable, you either get a 1 or a 0, but it might not be the same thing that the sender tried to transmit for various reasons (EMI, crosstalk). In most cables this happens randomly, not for every bit, and this leads to a nonzero error rate. There are more than two states for a cable: it can work perfectly, it can be totally useless, or it can be somewhere in between with an error rate. There are ways to design digital cables to lessen interference and crosstalk, which in turn reduces error rates at a given data transfer rate.

In practice, most cables are made to conform to specific standards that have been found to provide good performance at normal cable lengths without an unacceptably high rate of errors. HDMI cables fall into this category; a manufacturer cannot call a cable an HDMI cable unless they meet the standard and pass certain testing the standards body requires. So yes, there is no appreciable difference between HDMI cables. But no, in the general case any cable won't always do when it comes to digital signals.

In  other words, get the 50-cent cable from monoprice.  If, and only if, the stars align such that you see artifacts, consider upgrading to a better cable.

jordanread

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2458 on: April 24, 2014, 05:11:00 PM »
When it comes to cables, I always think of this fun little test that was done between high end Monster Cables vs a Coat Hanger

http://gizmodo.com/363154/audiophile-deathmatch-monster-cables-vs-a-coat-hanger

aetherie

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2459 on: April 24, 2014, 05:43:38 PM »
With regards to a friend who's trying to get a job in India so she can live with her boyfriend there:

Roommate 1: "Why doesn't she just, you know, go to India?"
Roommate 2: "With what money?"
Roommate 1: "Loans! That's what Americans do."

dragoncar

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2460 on: April 24, 2014, 06:13:49 PM »
When it comes to cables, I always think of this fun little test that was done between high end Monster Cables vs a Coat Hanger

http://gizmodo.com/363154/audiophile-deathmatch-monster-cables-vs-a-coat-hanger

That's mostly proof that most "audiophiles" are full of crap.  Love me some ABX testing.

the fixer

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2461 on: April 24, 2014, 06:22:18 PM »
It's only proof that speaker cable doesn't make much difference. That's not true of all types of cables. Try using two coat hangers to connect your TV or cable modem.

Bigote

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2462 on: April 24, 2014, 06:32:41 PM »
Back to topic, I worked with a girl who got stuck making monthly payments for her husband's ex-wife's engagement ring. 


Ok, let's declare this thread over.   You win.   :)

Insanity

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2463 on: April 24, 2014, 07:11:08 PM »
The marketing people are merely lying and scamming you.

Marketing people would never be that dishonest............................

notquitefrugal

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2464 on: April 24, 2014, 08:00:31 PM »
In  other words, get the 50-cent cable from monoprice.  If, and only if, the stars align such that you see artifacts, consider upgrading to a better cable.

I saw some weird pixellation when using an inexpensive, no-name 15-20' HDMI cable I bought. I bought another inexpensive, no-name 15-20' cable. Problem solved, and I still came out way ahead of buying the expensive one!

sheepstache

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2465 on: April 24, 2014, 08:12:53 PM »
Ok, I was pretty shocked at someone who's doing a 3-day raw food cleanse/detox, which--no, okay, let me not even get into that, but this service delivers a box of all the food you're supposed to eat during it.  Each day you get three juices, a snack, an entree, and a dessert.  It costs $72 a day.  To eat.  Less than you would normally.

http://coolercleanse.com/cleanse/raw
In case anyone is interested.

sunnyca

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2466 on: April 24, 2014, 08:47:32 PM »
Ok, I was pretty shocked at someone who's doing a 3-day raw food cleanse/detox, which--no, okay, let me not even get into that, but this service delivers a box of all the food you're supposed to eat during it.  Each day you get three juices, a snack, an entree, and a dessert.  It costs $72 a day.  To eat.  Less than you would normally.

http://coolercleanse.com/cleanse/raw
In case anyone is interested.

LOL- my neighbor did this cleanse (the juice only one)When I asked him why he didn't just blend/juice his own drinks, his explanation was that the juices from the cleanse were somehow "special."

horsepoor

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2467 on: April 24, 2014, 09:04:44 PM »
Ok, I was pretty shocked at someone who's doing a 3-day raw food cleanse/detox, which--no, okay, let me not even get into that, but this service delivers a box of all the food you're supposed to eat during it.  Each day you get three juices, a snack, an entree, and a dessert.  It costs $72 a day.  To eat.  Less than you would normally.

http://coolercleanse.com/cleanse/raw
In case anyone is interested.

LOL- my neighbor did this cleanse (the juice only one)When I asked him why he didn't just blend/juice his own drinks, his explanation was that the juices from the cleanse were somehow "special."

You could buy a nice-ass, brand new juicer for the price of 3 days of that!

dragoncar

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2468 on: April 24, 2014, 09:10:39 PM »
Ok, I was pretty shocked at someone who's doing a 3-day raw food cleanse/detox, which--no, okay, let me not even get into that, but this service delivers a box of all the food you're supposed to eat during it.  Each day you get three juices, a snack, an entree, and a dessert.  It costs $72 a day.  To eat.  Less than you would normally.

http://coolercleanse.com/cleanse/raw
In case anyone is interested.

LOL- my neighbor did this cleanse (the juice only one)When I asked him why he didn't just blend/juice his own drinks, his explanation was that the juices from the cleanse were somehow "special."

You could buy a nice-ass, brand new juicer for the price of 3 days of that!

Mmm... ass juicer...

Daisy

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2469 on: April 24, 2014, 09:39:46 PM »
Ok, I was pretty shocked at someone who's doing a 3-day raw food cleanse/detox, which--no, okay, let me not even get into that, but this service delivers a box of all the food you're supposed to eat during it.  Each day you get three juices, a snack, an entree, and a dessert.  It costs $72 a day.  To eat.  Less than you would normally.

http://coolercleanse.com/cleanse/raw
In case anyone is interested.

I posted earlier on this thread of a coworker that did the same. I didn't ask the cost though. Now I know...amazing....

Thanks for the link. Now I have some ideas on new things to cook myself. :-)
« Last Edit: April 24, 2014, 09:48:26 PM by Daisy »

Daisy

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2470 on: April 24, 2014, 09:45:14 PM »
I heard two good ones today at the company picnic. By good I mean surprisingly Mustachian. I guess it helps that I work with engineers.

CW1 accepted a severance package last year but they asked her to stay on until mid-year this year to finish a project. She's about to leave in a month. She shared that she's 46 and it's time for a break. She has plans to see her daughter off to college, teach dance classes, etc. She and her husband have been conservative with their finances their whole lives. She stated she's done everything right and by the book up until now and she's just going to enjoy this time. I could have said the same exact words! Unfortunately, she's not ready for ER yet.

CW2 and I were talking about potential upcoming severance packages and he's all ready to accept it as I am. He wants to slow travel to Europe with his wife and parents. He is also mid-40s.

They both mentioned that we are in our 40s and are tired of doing the same thing. So it looks like being financially prepared gives you options in life. I was very impressed!

Squirrel away

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2471 on: April 25, 2014, 01:51:14 AM »
In a meeting one of our managers mentioned our 401k and asked if anyone's participating. A few people including me raised our hands. Probably 5 out of 30 people. The manager urged the rest to start because it's free money. I agreed.

One guy sitting close to me said in a whisper, "My paycheck would be less. I fail to see how that is free money."

OMG, that is sad really.

mgarl10024

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2472 on: April 25, 2014, 04:37:42 AM »
FYI- most people probably already know this but you should pretty much buy the cheapest HDMI cable you can. No difference in quality.  They work or they don't.

But what about the gold plated connections?!

I *really* should have wrapped this comment in <sarcasm> tags.  :-)

Jack

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2473 on: April 25, 2014, 06:52:43 AM »
You could buy a nice-ass, brand new juicer for the price of 3 days of that!

Mmm... ass juicer...

Obligatory XKCD

CommonCents

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2474 on: April 25, 2014, 07:44:19 AM »
FYI- most people probably already know this but you should pretty much buy the cheapest HDMI cable you can. No difference in quality.  They work or they don't.

But what about the gold plated connections?!

I *really* should have wrapped this comment in <sarcasm> tags.  :-)

Don't worry, my computer beeped the tags at me when I read it.  I got it.  :)

sherr

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2475 on: April 25, 2014, 09:06:40 AM »
There can be almost any amount of noise introduced along the way; as long as the receiving computer is able to distinguish between a 1 or a 0 then no information is lost or added. High-quality connectors and cables are not important for digital signals; either the amount of noise is large enough that it overwrites the signal (in which case nothing will work) or it's not (in which case everything will work perfectly).

If a $5 HDMI cable works at all then it will produce exactly the same picture quality as a $100 HDMI cable.

What you say is correct but not entirely complete, a low quality cable can also suffer from noise and/or crosstalk which may degrade signal quality. Correction may be applied up to a point but when noise is too great you may experience that the picture/audio is jittery. Also, it is quite possible that only lower resolutions can be displayed due to the fact that higher displays demand higher throughput which cannot be achieved.
Low quality cables can especially be a problem for longer distances (10ft or more). So if you have the chance, buy a cable with money back guarantee so that you can test it!

Fair enough, I should have made it more clear that it's possible for there to be a non-zero error rate but still receive some signal. The general sentiment is the same though, try the cheap cables first. If there are no obvious problems then be happy because you are getting exactly the same picture quality as someone who bought expensive cables.

wauske is right. If cable quality didn't matter, data centers would be using Category 3 ethernet cabling, non-twisted-pair, everywhere instead of 5a/6/fiber.

I agree with everything else you say, but this is a bad example. If you only need to transmit data at 10 Mbit/s (the Cat 3 spec) then it makes no difference if you are doing it over Cat 3, Cat 6, or fiber. We are advising people how to buy consumer-grade cables to hook up their TV, not designing a new protocol / cable format that exceeds the existing format's ability to transmit data. Any cable that is actually manufactured and tested to work against a particular specification should be the same as any other cable that is manufactured and tested to work against the same specification. I'm not saying you can use any random wire you want to transmit any amount of data over any distance at any speed, I'm saying one HDMI 1.3 cat 2 cable is the same as another HDMI 1.3 cat 2 cable.

The complication of course is that there are several different specs of cables that are all called "HDMI" cables, so it is possible that one "HDMI" cable won't do the job that another "HDMI" cable will. It's also possible that the marketers are lying in the other direction, and selling cables at a higher standard than they actually conform to. However general advice for people that don't want to have to learn the details about everything is still the same, "try the cheap ones, if they work then they work. If they don't then you'll need something better."

On the receiving end of a cable, you either get a 1 or a 0, but it might not be the same thing that the sender tried to transmit for various reasons (EMI, crosstalk). In most cables this happens randomly, not for every bit, and this leads to a nonzero error rate. There are more than two states for a cable: it can work perfectly, it can be totally useless, or it can be somewhere in between with an error rate. There are ways to design digital cables to lessen interference and crosstalk, which in turn reduces error rates at a given data transfer rate.

In practice, most cables are made to conform to specific standards that have been found to provide good performance at normal cable lengths without an unacceptably high rate of errors. HDMI cables fall into this category; a manufacturer cannot call a cable an HDMI cable unless they meet the standard and pass certain testing the standards body requires. So yes, there is no appreciable difference between HDMI cables. But no, in the general case any cable won't always do when it comes to digital signals.

frugledoc

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2476 on: April 25, 2014, 09:29:28 AM »
What a bxxch
I didn't think so.  I thought it was a misguided way to avoid conflict and to save the embarrassment of telling everyone the wedding was cancelled.  After all, the guy came out WAY ahead -- his debt was paid off by the girl's father, and I'm pretty sure her dad ended up giving him money to walk away.  Perhaps you assumed the guy made more than she did and she was making the decision based on money?   

Or did you mean me for attending a sham wedding?

No didn't mean you.  I was just being judgemental about somebody wasting all that money knowing they would get divorced a year later.

MgoSam

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2477 on: April 25, 2014, 11:41:17 AM »
We used to have ham at Easter dinner and my family is Irish Catholic.

Coworker A to Coworker B: I can't believe co-worker C spent $9,000 just on his wedding photographer. Our whole wedding only cost that much!
Me [silently in my head]: WTF???? (Or as Co-worker A put it, you can have a really fancy pants wedding for $9k. I've been to 3K and 5K weddings and they were still pretty good - especially the 5k one, it didn't feel like a "budget wedding" at all.)

My sister-in-law spent about £30,000 on her wedding, I could probably write a whole thread about her spending!

How much have people here spent on your wedding? I know very little about planning a wedding. I know that for both my brother's and sister's wedding they went way over what they initially planned to spend, and seeing how much time, effort, and stress went into the wedding I clearly remember thinking that should I get married, eloping would be far preferable.

tmac

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2478 on: April 25, 2014, 11:48:44 AM »
How much have people here spent on your wedding? I know very little about planning a wedding. I know that for both my brother's and sister's wedding they went way over what they initially planned to spend, and seeing how much time, effort, and stress went into the wedding I clearly remember thinking that should I get married, eloping would be far preferable.

First wedding, to a spendthrift guy with an even worse family: $8,000. Not including rings or honeymoon. Very stressful and unpleasant. The marriage lasted 2 years.

Second wedding, to my current husband (13th anniversary in 2 days): $800. Including everything. Piece of cake, very little planning, except was actually important to us. Our 12th anniversary is in two days.

MgoSam

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2479 on: April 25, 2014, 12:08:29 PM »
How much have people here spent on your wedding? I know very little about planning a wedding. I know that for both my brother's and sister's wedding they went way over what they initially planned to spend, and seeing how much time, effort, and stress went into the wedding I clearly remember thinking that should I get married, eloping would be far preferable.

First wedding, to a spendthrift guy with an even worse family: $8,000. Not including rings or honeymoon. Very stressful and unpleasant. The marriage lasted 2 years.

Second wedding, to my current husband (13th anniversary in 2 days): $800. Including everything. Piece of cake, very little planning, except was actually important to us. Our 12th anniversary is in two days.

How were you able to do it for $800?

It is absolutely insane how much my family and many members of the Indian community spend on their weddings. Of course weddings are week long events which might have multiple venues, open bar, and some families will put up out of town guests in a hotel.

Insanity

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2480 on: April 25, 2014, 12:09:30 PM »
Second wedding, to my current husband (13th anniversary in 2 days): $800. Including everything. Piece of cake, very little planning, except was actually important to us. Our 12th anniversary is in two days.

Ummm......

frugalamber

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2481 on: April 25, 2014, 12:27:11 PM »
How were you able to do it for $800?

It is absolutely insane how much my family and many members of the Indian community spend on their weddings. Of course weddings are week long events which might have multiple venues, open bar, and some families will put up out of town guests in a hotel.
I have some knowledge on this - We paid for our wedding close to a decade back. Was about $8k. We each paid 3k and both side parents paid 1k including travel for 3 adults from US to india and back. This feb we attended bil's wedding, in-laws paid same $1k invested around the time of our wedding, so close to 2.5-3k; he paid 7-8k including flying 13 members across the country for the wedding. The girl side must have paid atleast 4-5k alone. Was a huge affair with 3500 people at the girls place by their own choice.

tmac

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2482 on: April 25, 2014, 12:43:48 PM »
Second wedding, to my current husband (13th anniversary in 2 days): $800. Including everything. Piece of cake, very little planning, except was actually important to us. Our 12th anniversary is in two days.

Ummm......

Ack! I wrote the 13th, then did the math and realized it was just 12. Don't tell my husband. :)

tmac

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2483 on: April 25, 2014, 12:53:26 PM »
How much have people here spent on your wedding? I know very little about planning a wedding. I know that for both my brother's and sister's wedding they went way over what they initially planned to spend, and seeing how much time, effort, and stress went into the wedding I clearly remember thinking that should I get married, eloping would be far preferable.

First wedding, to a spendthrift guy with an even worse family: $8,000. Not including rings or honeymoon. Very stressful and unpleasant. The marriage lasted 2 years.

Second wedding, to my current husband (13th anniversary in 2 days): $800. Including everything. Piece of cake, very little planning, except was actually important to us. Our 12th anniversary is in two days.

How were you able to do it for $800?

It was a seriously laid back wedding. My dress was $80 from JJill. DH wore clothes he already owned. Our rings were simple and on sale. We planned a week long trip to the mountains. We drove there, and camped with family for a couple of days, then got married in botanical garden at full-bloom mid-week with 9 other people in attendance. My mom was our officiant (secular, "ordained" online). We had dinner at a great restaurant in town, then spent one night alone at a nice hotel before returning to the campsite with the rest of the family for a couple more days.

BlueHouse

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2484 on: April 25, 2014, 01:03:22 PM »
What a bxxch
I didn't think so.  I thought it was a misguided way to avoid conflict and to save the embarrassment of telling everyone the wedding was cancelled.  After all, the guy came out WAY ahead -- his debt was paid off by the girl's father, and I'm pretty sure her dad ended up giving him money to walk away.  Perhaps you assumed the guy made more than she did and she was making the decision based on money?   

Or did you mean me for attending a sham wedding?

No didn't mean you.  I was just being judgemental about somebody wasting all that money knowing they would get divorced a year later.
Oh, yeah, I definitely get that.  I think it's wasteful even if you do stay married.  I've seen other people write this sentiment better, but the difference between whether the bride and groom are focused on "the wedding" or "the marriage" speaks volumes towards its chance of success.  The Cinderella, over-the-top, three-ring-circus type of wedding is pushed on girls from very early on.  I think most women fall prey to it and you're certainly eyeballed differently if you don't want a big fancy wedding. 

To a lesser extent, I see it with funerals too.  WHO CARES what kind of box you're in?  You're DEAD!!  I've told my family to just wrap me in a sheet and throw me in the fire (after all useful organs and skin are used).  Barring that, I will accept the hambone treatment.  (shove a hambone up my a$$ and throw me out to the dogs)
Sometimes nothing can be a real cool hand

Insanity

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2485 on: April 25, 2014, 01:36:18 PM »
Second wedding, to my current husband (13th anniversary in 2 days): $800. Including everything. Piece of cake, very little planning, except was actually important to us. Our 12th anniversary is in two days.

Ummm......

Ack! I wrote the 13th, then did the math and realized it was just 12. Don't tell my husband. :)

LOL.  I figured that. And that's alright, he won't know since I misquoted you above :-/

Fonzico

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2486 on: April 25, 2014, 01:42:25 PM »
Although I'm not 100% certain on the final total amount spent on our wedding, it was definitely under $3000.

And most of that was renting a large property in the mountains for us and both of our families for a week, which was also where the wedding was, so if you only count the one day's worth of the venue costs, it was closer to $2000. The rest was just a big group vacation, and it was awesome :)

I had TWO dresses! At a cost of $25 each. I did have to spend a bit for appropriate undergarments, and my hubby got a new dress shirt/pants/vest combo, so clothing costs between us were about $300. Neither of us wore shoes :)

Officiant was $150 (can't ordain random people in Canada, you need either a religious officiant, or a marriage commissioner)

Food and alcohol: We supplied wine and beer, and our parents cooked the meal, which was steak, salmon, and chicken, corn on the cob, ceaser salad, veggie and cheese plates. We did have a cake made, I think it was around $200. <-- this was my SIL's insistence, and either she or my MIL paid for it. I didn't want cake, and didn't care if we had it. We also had a midnight snack of grilled cheese :) Total food and drink costs were around $500.

Decorations: Some paper lanterns we hung from the trees. Small yellow bird cages and candles on the tables. We did buy table clothes, which cost around $150 and were our one big decorative splurge, but have since been re-purposed for curtains.

We hired a photographer who was still building up her portfolio, and who decided to make a vacation of it, and didn't charge us mileage. She cost us $500 total.

Other ways we kept it cheap:
A friend offered to bring sound equipment, and while we had prepared a playlist, he actually surprised us by DJing the whole night, which was super cool of him.

My best friend happens to be a hair dresser, so she did my hair for free.

My in-laws already owned a party tent and several folding tables and chairs, so we didn't have to rent any other those things.

I didn't include our ring costs here, but they were approx $400 for all three of them (engagement, and two wedding bands)

And we only had thirty guests, and no wedding party. This included immediate family, most of our nieces and nephews, and about a dozen close friends.


It helped that the people we care about know us well enough to not expect a big, fancy event. It was so much fun, totally "us", and by all reports, no one minded the lack of all the expensive things that people usually spend on weddings. Most of our guests had a beer in hand, while watching us tie the knot in front a beautiful lake on a sweltering August day, and I wouldn't change a damn thing.

caherriman

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2487 on: April 25, 2014, 01:52:39 PM »
We paid roughly $1600 for our wedding. And that includes my $1200 ring. Which I do not even wear anymore. My hands got fat haha. I told DH that I want my ring resized for our 8th anniversary coming up. That is all I want. I have friends that say if they could go back they would do this or that bigger. I would just get a cheaper ring.

I heard this from a wife of one of DH CW:

CWW: My DH has set a $600 grocery limit for the month.
Me: That is not too bad. I budget the same for our groceries for a family of 5 (They are a family of 4 during the week, Then a family of 6 on some weekends while his kids are there and her kids are at their dads)
CWW: That is supposed to include our gas as well. I spend $480 in gas alone!
Me: SO basically he wants you to spend $120 for food for the entire month?
CWW: Well, he just spent $60 in energy drinks.
Me: Wait, no your monthly limit is $60 for groceries??
CWW: Well, do not forget about his gas.

I just pretty much laughed at her and him. Great people but I just think out of touch with how much groceries cost...way out of touch. Granted she could not really spend less gas. She has joint custody of the kids and her Ex lives in a different city. Well douch ex had them enrolled in a school in his town and she can not un enroll them because of court orders. Even though she had them most of the school week. SO every day she would have to drive to the city and back 89 miles roundtrip 2x a day on M/T/W and 1x on Thur. And she could not just hang out in the town waiting for school to get out because she has a job in the town she lives in.

Quark

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2488 on: April 25, 2014, 02:09:49 PM »
Was discussing retirement with 2 coworkers
CW1 (60y, male) here is my retirement countdown for my early retirement at 62. My dad retired at 50.
CW2 (30y male) i couldn't retire early, all i'd want to do is stuff that spends money! My hobbies cost so much! EX: going clay shooting costs so much for all the rental of equipment and space!
My (27yo female) reply: I'm going to retire by 40. I don't spend money on anything. Otherwise how would I retire at 40?! EX: my gpa owns a clay machine and we go on our own land. (Secretly thinking: You're doing it wrong!)

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2489 on: April 25, 2014, 02:17:02 PM »
Second wedding, to my current husband (13th anniversary in 2 days): $800. Including everything. Piece of cake, very little planning, except was actually important to us. Our 12th anniversary is in two days.

Ummm......

Ack! I wrote the 13th, then did the math and realized it was just 12. Don't tell my husband. :)

LOL.  I figured that. And that's alright, he won't know since I misquoted you above :-/

Hah! I didn't notice that. Dodged a bullet there...

MgoSam

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2490 on: April 25, 2014, 09:42:54 PM »
Our wedding cost under $2,500.

Dress and rings: $200 (grandmother paid)
Officiant: $50 and that included the room at the town hall
Fancy wedding dinner at restaurant with the grown-up guests: $900 (parents paid for wedding gift)
Photographer: $1000
Food for giant college party the next night: $150
State Fees: under $100

It was lovely.

Thank you! This certainly is food for thought for if and when I get married. I can imagine that if I find a women that is also like-minded in having a simple wedding it would be a good omen for my marriage.

Squirrel away

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2491 on: April 26, 2014, 01:50:39 AM »
Our wedding cost about £100 I think? It was just the price of a registry office ceremony and a (dressy for me) dress I bought on ebay and then resold after the wedding. We just went to a bar that sold food afterwards with a few family and friends and they paid for their own food and drinks. LOL.

This wasn't even when we were frugal as we had CC debt back then, we just couldn't afford much else and I have no interest in spending a lot of money on one day.


dweebyhawkeyes

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2492 on: April 27, 2014, 05:36:05 PM »
Aw I love these cheap-o wedding stories. As a teen, I spent half my time in volunteer work, and one of my favorite jobs was with a retired woman who owned a ton of fake flowers and columns and trellises (?) etc, and we would loan those out and cater for weddings to low-income couples. The couple would rent a library or a beach or someone's backyard, and for nothing we would pretty the whole thing up, feed everyone, and find high school photographers who wanted to build a portfolio. I'm sure there are others who would do similar. It's always amazing to me how many resources are available to those who search.

skunkfunk

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2493 on: April 28, 2014, 07:52:36 AM »
Mine was $5k all told, including everything. That's about twice what we aimed for, as some of the costs unexpectedly exploded.

Some of the guests complained that we weren't in a fancy enough venue. We did it in my wife's home church, which is a rural church built by the members own hands many decades ago. It was free and apparently not upscale enough to please my cousins. Some also complained about "driving out into the boonies" to be served homemade wedding cake and sandwiches but no booze.

CommonCents

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2494 on: April 28, 2014, 09:28:13 AM »
You know what?  We paid a *lot* more for our wedding than anyone posting here.  And I'm 100% ok with that, because it was something that was important to me and we were on a financially sound footing. 

I grew up a military brat.  I'm pretty proud of my dad.  He was even one of the first inducted into the Coast Guard hall of heroes.  But this meant I moved every few years, leaving behind friends each time - and back in the day when you had to write snail mail to stay in touch (horrors!).  I figured my wedding and funeral are the two times when I'd have all of the people I love in one place, and I wanted to treat them well and take care of them.  After all, I certainly wouldn't appreciate it at my funeral!

I bargain shopped, I negotiated, I made a lot myself and I did without of things that didnít matter.  But we DID spend a lot on good food for people, an open bar, gifts to thank people, and our wedding rings (I donít wear much jewelry and this is the only piece of jewelry we wear every single day).  And that's ok - and I daresay, even still mustachian.

Oh and we came within 0.001% of our budget.  :)

Threshkin

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2495 on: April 28, 2014, 11:21:34 AM »
How much have people here spent on your wedding? I know very little about planning a wedding. I know that for both my brother's and sister's wedding they went way over what they initially planned to spend, and seeing how much time, effort, and stress went into the wedding I clearly remember thinking that should I get married, eloping would be far preferable.

I have been married twice.  The first time my out of pocket cost was $50.00.  $25 for the license and $25 tip to the JP.

Fast forward 29 years and I get married again.  Out of pocket cost for the wedding?  $50.00  This time it was all for the license.  We married ourselves in the court house and had the clerk take the wedding pictures.

rocksinmyhead

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2496 on: April 28, 2014, 11:22:09 AM »
You know what?  We paid a *lot* more for our wedding than anyone posting here.  And I'm 100% ok with that, because it was something that was important to me and we were on a financially sound footing. 

I grew up a military brat.  I'm pretty proud of my dad.  He was even one of the first inducted into the Coast Guard hall of heroes.  But this meant I moved every few years, leaving behind friends each time - and back in the day when you had to write snail mail to stay in touch (horrors!).  I figured my wedding and funeral are the two times when I'd have all of the people I love in one place, and I wanted to treat them well and take care of them.  After all, I certainly wouldn't appreciate it at my funeral!

I bargain shopped, I negotiated, I made a lot myself and I did without of things that didnít matter.  But we DID spend a lot on good food for people, an open bar, gifts to thank people, and our wedding rings (I donít wear much jewelry and this is the only piece of jewelry we wear every single day).  And that's ok - and I daresay, even still mustachian.

Oh and we came within 0.001% of our budget.  :)

These are basically my feelings on my (future) wedding. and I think it still totally fits with the MMM theme... spending on what is important to YOU, not on what everybody else spends on. there are many wedding aspects I couldn't give two shits about (decorations, fancy venue, fancy cake, etc.) but our families are hundreds of miles apart (from us, and each other) and we have friends all over... assuming we can afford it, I am more than willing to spend on good food, good beer, and NOT cutting the guest list. oh, and maybe a photographer. yes, it's ONE day, and it's important to keep it in perspective... but like you said, it's also one day that you (hopefully) only get once!

dandarc

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2497 on: April 28, 2014, 11:33:29 AM »
Yeah, our wedding definitely belongs here in the 'Antimustachian' thread.  I pulled up the old spreadsheet and it says 25K.  I suspect it was actually more than that - noticing that a couple things like 'Invitations' are not on there.  We did come in under budget on a few things, so maybe 25K is right.

Normally, I'd go back and add it up, but I've been working on letting go of some of the things this exercise would bring up (like my now in-laws not paying a dime for any of this, while applying constant pressure for very expensive things, and continuing to criticize our decisions even when we did exactly what they asked for).

Any way, it was a heck of a great party, but I think if we were to do it over again, particularly after finding this blog, we'd stick to our guns a little better.

nawhite

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2498 on: April 28, 2014, 02:08:03 PM »
A co-worker bought a brand new car over the weekend. He got an FJ Cruiser, probably around $32k. He also got all of the "extended warranty" options. He will spend more in interest payments on his car than I paid for my last car.

The best part was some of the quotes:

"My wife and I alternate who gets a new car every 5 years, but I sure was liking not having a car payment. Oh well." (they separate finances I think)

"I really needed the 4 wheel drive. ... We don't really like camping or not having running water." (... so we wont really take this anywhere we would need 4 wheel drive...) "Maybe we'll get an camper trailer though, that would make sense."

CW: "We don't drive that much, but I sure am going to miss the gas mileage of what I had."
Me: "Oh, what did you have before?"
CW: "A 2004 Scion xA" (happens to be the same car as MMM)
Me: "Well, what are you doing with your old car" (maybe I want to buy it?)
CW: "Because we took such great care of it and only had 80k miles on it, the dealer gave me $3k for it as a trade in!" (this car is worth $7k easily on craigslist and probably $5000 at carmax)


We live in an RV full time while still working remotely. Check it out at http://therecklesschoice.com

AlmostIndependent

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Re: Overheard at Work
« Reply #2499 on: April 28, 2014, 05:27:46 PM »
A co-worker bought a brand new car over the weekend. He got an FJ Cruiser, probably around $32k. He also got all of the "extended warranty" options. He will spend more in interest payments on his car than I paid for my last car.

The best part was some of the quotes:

"My wife and I alternate who gets a new car every 5 years, but I sure was liking not having a car payment. Oh well." (they separate finances I think)

"I really needed the 4 wheel drive. ... We don't really like camping or not having running water." (... so we wont really take this anywhere we would need 4 wheel drive...) "Maybe we'll get an camper trailer though, that would make sense."

CW: "We don't drive that much, but I sure am going to miss the gas mileage of what I had."
Me: "Oh, what did you have before?"
CW: "A 2004 Scion xA" (happens to be the same car as MMM)
Me: "Well, what are you doing with your old car" (maybe I want to buy it?)
CW: "Because we took such great care of it and only had 80k miles on it, the dealer gave me $3k for it as a trade in!" (this car is worth $7k easily on craigslist and probably $5000 at carmax)

I bet that car dealer is still laughing.
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