About 15 years ago when I lived in Virginia, I interviewed a young woman who would eventually take the job I was leaving to go back to get my Master's degree. Since she was now working with my old coworkers, I would run into her and her husband at get togethers. 3 years later, I got a job in the same place of employment that I had left but in a completely different department from where I worked previously. As luck would have it, I ended up working with my replacement's husband. Let's call him "Reprehensible A-hole Extraordinaire" or "RAE" for short. I hope I'm not giving away too much of the story already:).
Needless to say, after working with RAE for About 6 months, I developed strong negative feelings for him as a person. Just as an example of his character, he announced one day that he was going to go to lunch with his "surprise to all of us" now 10 year old son. Turns out, 10 years ago, his girlfriend got pregnant with his child. They moved into a house together and he told her that they would be together as a family. Then one day, when she was about 2 weeks away from the due date, he went out to get groceries and just never came back. Now remember, HE is telling us this story, so this is first person vice the rumor mill. Anyway, he admits he just left her with nothing, no $, no support, nada. About 2 years after the child was born, the exGF asked him to sign over all parental rights so the boy could be adopted by her new husband. RAE was more than happy to do so. Now, 10 years later the boy wanted to meet RAE and get to know him. During those 10 years, he met and married the above mentioned young lady who replaced me in my old job. (Let's call her Naive Wife #1, or NW1 for short). (Again, hope I'm not giving too much away....) It was my understanding that NW1 knew about the circumstances of RAE's first child and married him anyway...
RAE and I worked together for about a year during which time, RAE and NW1 show a penchant for lunches out, luxury sedans, dinners out with drinks, designer clothes, Harley Davidson motorcycle, and high end cigars. Given RAE and NW1's DINK status, I never questioned their spending. They bought a home about 45 minutes drive from work. All seemed well on the financial front. However, after my first year at my new job, I overheard a loud and very contentious meeting between RAE and our boss and less than 2 months later, RAE left abruptly and got a new job at another company.
Years pass and I lose touch with RAE (honestly, I made no effort to keep in contact with him) and NW1, but hear occasionally about them from my old coworkers, mainly that they now have 3 daughters. I relocate to Florida with my company, and I hear that RAE and NW1 are in the same city (having also been relocated to Florida since NW1 and I still work for the same company). But by this time, I have had no contact with them in years, so I really had no idea what was going on in their lives. 2 years after moving to Florida, an old coworker friend and his wife come to visit me. They call me to let me know they are leaving NW1's house and will be at mine in 10 minutes. I laughed, and said, "NW1 doesn't live 10 minutes away, they live about an hour away, so I will see you in an hour..."
12 minutes later, my friends ring my doorbell! I am so surprised that when I open the door, I blurt out, "Did RAE and NW1 move?" To which my friends replied in sudden hushed voices, "Don't you know what happened?" I tell them no....
Turns out, RAE, being RAE, decided to not just step in, but full body bathe in his own crapulence and ended up having an affair with his 22 year old step-niece, who is the daughter of his brother's wife from a prior relationship. So step-niece was not blood related, but RAE and NW1 had known her since she was 10 years old and had been a family fixture at Christmas, birthdays and other family gatherings.
So NW1, having discovered the affair, immediately filed for divorce and moved to a small townhouse about 10 minutes from my place with her and RAE's 3 daughters. I was totally gobsmacked not only at the sordidness of the entire affair, but the follow on details which I discover from our mutual friends are as follows:
1) RAE had left his employer in Virginia and took a new job with another employer in Florida. About 9 months before the affair was discovered, he was let go due to"ethical issues". I have no idea what those ethical issues were, but am fairly certain, given RAE's past, they were grounded. So, at the time of the divorce, RAE had been unemployed for several months...
2) RAE and NW1 had sold their home in Virginia (for quite a bit of profit), but were renting in Florida. I have no idea what happened to the profit from the sale of the VA home.
3) After filing for divorce, NW1 moved to another rental closer to work with the 3 daughters, which necessitated them moving from the schools and friends they had been in previously, because they could no longer afford to rent the home they lived in before. So now they had to start over in a new school, no friends, and no dad (and the aftermath of whatever fallout on their dad's side of the family).
4) Worst of all, due to RAE's unemployment, and (it turns out very very very poor financial decisions on both RAE and NW1's part for their entire marriage during which time RAE made over $100k per year and NW1 made just under $100k per year for well over 10 years) they had no assets to split. So poor NW1 got nothing from RAE, not even child support for their 3 young daughters, and I would guess, she probably got slapped with half of the debt they probably incurred with their lifestyle.
I understand that NW1 remarried less than a year later, and RAE moved up north to try to start his own consulting company.
SMH...