Author Topic: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.  (Read 280554 times)

LeRainDrop

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #650 on: August 07, 2016, 12:05:42 PM »
Is it possible to say "no thanks" to the real estate part and keep the cash?

I'm no expert, but perhaps a partial disclaimer will work.

Here's a good starting point for your research on turning down the real estate.  http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/disclaimers.html

Paul der Krake

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #651 on: August 07, 2016, 01:41:22 PM »
Inherited real estate is a nightmare because inevitably one or more of the recipients values it well above market price. Sometimes it's somewhat legitimate (childhood home, lots of memories, whatever), but often there's just something about owning a piece of property that fries people's brains. It becomes their God-given duty to act in the best interests of everyone else, even if nobody else sees it that way.

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #652 on: August 07, 2016, 03:43:29 PM »


DBF found this one in some "Best of Reddit" post.

Oh my god.  And the same person posted this just a few days ago...

Just made a new thread!  Sorry for the derailment!
http://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/off-topic/op-is-the-only-one-who-doesn't-see-it/
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paddedhat

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #653 on: August 07, 2016, 07:52:04 PM »
Not really drama, but we've got an unusual situation (I think).  DH got a letter from the trustee of an estate today, and his share is <2% of said estate.  The money, fine, he'll be happy to take that, but he also will get the same small percentage of a dozen properties in and around a small town in NC, some of which is vacant land, some is vacant buildings, and some, I believe, is rented.  So now there will be over 40 people, spread out across the country, who each own a small amount of this bunch of real estate.

At this point, we don't even know if the rents will cover taxes and maintenance, and nothing really sells in that area.  Plus, trying to get over 3 dozen people to agree on anything...  Is it possible to say "no thanks" to the real estate part and keep the cash?



Get the estate to liquidate the real estate and distribute cash. Or at the very least put the beneficiaries in touch so that you can sell off your share (if you go cheap enough, someone will want it.)

Seriously.

Getting that many people to ever agree will be a nightmare. A friend of mine spent about 10 years untangling a situation where about 10 family members inherited a property. It was ridiculous.

I once had a true good ole' boy from the swamps of Louisiana, as an employee. He came to me with a document, as he needed a witness. He was inheriting a couple of hundred bucks as a very distant relative of a long departed, VERY large landholder in the swamps. I asked how many of his kin were getting a little bit of the pie? He told me that they numbered in the hundreds. I imagine at that point, it's a bit like a class action suit. legal council makes a ton, to make sure that each third cousin get's a bit.

 I have another buddy that ended up with a hell of a pile of cheddar, well over a million, but it took nearly forty years until the estate was finally settled. His grandfather was sharp and bought a ton of farm land, and woodland, before WW2, when our local farmers were basically operating on a sustenance level, and barely feeding their own families. A lot of farms were bought for less than $10/acre. He held on to most of it, then died, quite old, in the early 1960s. The battle to decide exactly who got what % of the pie lasted for the next twenty years, or more, before the first property was liquidated. The battle even went to the state supreme court. As sons and daughters died off, it would cause new pissing contests to flare up.  It became the life's work of one estate attorney, who even wrote a book about handling one of the longest contested estates in our state's history. The final property was liquidated in the early 2000s.

Kitsune

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #654 on: August 08, 2016, 06:00:05 AM »
Inherited real estate is a nightmare because inevitably one or more of the recipients values it well above market price. Sometimes it's somewhat legitimate (childhood home, lots of memories, whatever), but often there's just something about owning a piece of property that fries people's brains. It becomes their God-given duty to act in the best interests of everyone else, even if nobody else sees it that way.

This, so true.

When my husbands grandfather died, my MIL and her brother were the executors of the estate (modest, overall). The family home went up for sale in an area with a super-slow real estate market. Her other brother was PISSED at her for agreeing to sell it for 3k under what he felt it should be sold for after it had been on the market for 2 years. She felt that keeping it on the market for another 6 months would cost 3k in taxes, and that it was a smarter move to cut losses. Oh, man.

This is also the dude who insisted on lugging 50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue and the phone book out of his parents attic and into his because "someone will want them". The look on his kids face was just... "Oh, great, we're now getting visions of having to empty all this stuff out. AGAIN."

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #655 on: August 08, 2016, 07:56:32 AM »
Oh man, cut your loses and just bail on those old catalogs and possibly even the property in NC. What's his share? $3K?

Might be worth $3K not to get dragged into a headache deal that could last years.

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #656 on: August 08, 2016, 01:26:20 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

AlanStache

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #657 on: August 08, 2016, 02:06:06 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

Looks like much of this is already on line:

https://www.flickr.com/photos/wishbook/sets/1360453/
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Kitsune

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #658 on: August 08, 2016, 02:14:03 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

That was my thing - he didn't thumb through them at all!! He moved them from his dad's attic to his, and there they'll stay until their kids empty out that house.

LadyMuMu

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #659 on: August 08, 2016, 03:37:47 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

That was my thing - he didn't thumb through them at all!! He moved them from his dad's attic to his, and there they'll stay until their kids empty out that house.

I feel their pain. I've spent a significant amount of time this week trying to convince my MIL that her Encyclopedia Brittanica is not worth keeping when she downsizes into a 1-br apartment from a 3,000 sq ft home. I made the mistake of saying something like, with Google and Wikipedia, they don't even make those any longer. Her response? Well, then they'll be valuable one day! Argh! Even the used bookstore and the Goodwill won't take them!

paddedhat

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #660 on: August 08, 2016, 08:33:35 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

That was my thing - he didn't thumb through them at all!! He moved them from his dad's attic to his, and there they'll stay until their kids empty out that house.

I feel their pain. I've spent a significant amount of time this week trying to convince my MIL that her Encyclopedia Brittanica is not worth keeping when she downsizes into a 1-br apartment from a 3,000 sq ft home. I made the mistake of saying something like, with Google and Wikipedia, they don't even make those any longer. Her response? Well, then they'll be valuable one day! Argh! Even the used bookstore and the Goodwill won't take them!

As technology marches on, LOL. I have a box in the local post office, since our neighborhood cannot get delivery to individual houses. every year, at least two idiot phone book companies pay the post office to deliver a metric shit ton of their latest phone books. This involves the local postal employees being forced to stuff thousands of books into  PO BOXES that are too small, and pissing off hundreds of customers who have to dig them out of the boxes and stack them on the floor, any available counter space, and wherever there is room to  leave them behind at the post office. The vast majority of the customer base has zero interest in a phone book, but the publishers still trick idiot businesses into spending silly amounts to advertise, based on the huge volume of books they place in every home in the area. The USPS then pays a recycling outfit to pick up a few thousand pounds of worthless phone books. It's capitalism at it's best.

Taran Wanderer

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #661 on: August 08, 2016, 08:49:57 PM »
As technology marches on, LOL. I have a box in the local post office, since our neighborhood cannot get delivery to individual houses. every year, at least two idiot phone book companies pay the post office to deliver a metric shit ton of their latest phone books. This involves the local postal employees being forced to stuff thousands of books into  PO BOXES that are too small, and pissing off hundreds of customers who have to dig them out of the boxes and stack them on the floor, any available counter space, and wherever there is room to  leave them behind at the post office. The vast majority of the customer base has zero interest in a phone book, but the publishers still trick idiot businesses into spending silly amounts to advertise, based on the huge volume of books they place in every home in the area. The USPS then pays a recycling outfit to pick up a few thousand pounds of worthless phone books. It's capitalism at it's best.

So, my post office is not unique.  I don't know whether to feel comforted or horrified.

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #662 on: August 08, 2016, 10:04:25 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

For several years I provided housing to a pile of NatGeo mags. I kept the most interesting dozen and gave the rest away. You can get the whole collection on DVD for cheap.

I have a reprint of a 1906 Sears catalog that has been in the family since I was born. Have thumbed through that thing a thousand times. I'd love to look through the different catalogs but I don't want to own them. Once upon a time yes when I was more of a packrat, not now.

Telephone books were bagged and laid at the end of the driveway of everyone for miles. We picked up our's and put it straight into the recycle bin. Hate it but we haven't used a phone book in years.
« Last Edit: August 08, 2016, 10:06:49 PM by Joe Lucky »

misshershey

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #663 on: August 08, 2016, 10:25:14 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

For several years I provided housing to a pile of NatGeo mags. I kept the most interesting dozen and gave the rest away. You can get the whole collection on DVD for cheap.

I have a reprint of a 1906 Sears catalog that has been in the family since I was born. Have thumbed through that thing a thousand times. I'd love to look through the different catalogs but I don't want to own them. Once upon a time yes when I was more of a packrat, not now.

Telephone books were bagged and laid at the end of the driveway of everyone for miles. We picked up our's and put it straight into the recycle bin. Hate it but we haven't used a phone book in years.

Ooooh, I can help with this! Go to www.yellowpagesoptout.com and you can get off the delivery lists for phone books. I had to do it a year or so ago--we get 4 *different* phone books every year--what a ridiculous waste of paper.

AlanStache

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #664 on: August 09, 2016, 05:33:17 AM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

For several years I provided housing to a pile of NatGeo mags. I kept the most interesting dozen and gave the rest away. You can get the whole collection on DVD for cheap.

I have a reprint of a 1906 Sears catalog that has been in the family since I was born. Have thumbed through that thing a thousand times. I'd love to look through the different catalogs but I don't want to own them. Once upon a time yes when I was more of a packrat, not now.

Telephone books were bagged and laid at the end of the driveway of everyone for miles. We picked up our's and put it straight into the recycle bin. Hate it but we haven't used a phone book in years.

Ooooh, I can help with this! Go to www.yellowpagesoptout.com and you can get off the delivery lists for phone books. I had to do it a year or so ago--we get 4 *different* phone books every year--what a ridiculous waste of paper.

Surprisingly interesting article from msn: http://www.msn.com/en-us/money/companies/the-infuriating-reason-you-still-get-a-phonebook-delivered-every-year/ar-AA5VCAJ   Apparently as of even a few years ago yellow pages were profitable even with tens of millions being tossed in the trash.


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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #665 on: August 09, 2016, 06:42:02 AM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

For several years I provided housing to a pile of NatGeo mags. I kept the most interesting dozen and gave the rest away. You can get the whole collection on DVD for cheap.

I have a reprint of a 1906 Sears catalog that has been in the family since I was born. Have thumbed through that thing a thousand times. I'd love to look through the different catalogs but I don't want to own them. Once upon a time yes when I was more of a packrat, not now.

Telephone books were bagged and laid at the end of the driveway of everyone for miles. We picked up our's and put it straight into the recycle bin. Hate it but we haven't used a phone book in years.

Ooooh, I can help with this! Go to www.yellowpagesoptout.com and you can get off the delivery lists for phone books. I had to do it a year or so ago--we get 4 *different* phone books every year--what a ridiculous waste of paper.

Surprisingly interesting article from msn: http://www.msn.com/en-us/money/companies/the-infuriating-reason-you-still-get-a-phonebook-delivered-every-year/ar-AA5VCAJ   Apparently as of even a few years ago yellow pages were profitable even with tens of millions being tossed in the trash.

Businesses still pay for ads, especially if their clientele skews older. I worked around the industry and talked to more than a few customers. Their older customers still were using phone books.

The industry still exists because there is still money and you don't have to spend much in capital to keep it coming. Just manage your costs (aka downsizing each year). Being there was like we were working on the Titanic. They still talked about how the glory days were great but everyone knew that we had hit the iceberg and we're going down.
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paddedhat

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #666 on: August 09, 2016, 06:59:01 AM »
Ooooh, I can help with this! Go to www.yellowpagesoptout.com and you can get off the delivery lists for phone books. I had to do it a year or so ago--we get 4 *different* phone books every year--what a ridiculous waste of paper.

This one of the few things that I am unable to opt out of.  The phone book companies will bomb the local post office with tons of books, all addressed as "postal customer" and zip code. I have discussed the issue with our local postal employees. They are honest about the fact that they are a bit paranoid with congress attempting to destroy their pensions, and all the other BS their employer dishes out. Their take is that ANY piece of mail, junk or not, is a good thing, so the ritual of hauling a few tons of new phone books off to the recycler is just another way to stay busy, and employed.

Surprisingly interesting article from msn: http://www.msn.com/en-us/money/companies/the-infuriating-reason-you-still-get-a-phonebook-delivered-every-year/ar-AA5VCAJ   Apparently as of even a few years ago yellow pages were profitable even with tens of millions being tossed in the trash.

Interesting. My brother is a salesman, not just any salesman, but the kind of guy who could sell birth control pills to nuns, with a 200% commission, and leave the nuns looking forward to calling him personally for their next refills. He currently makes $70-80K selling advertising on the back of cash register tapes, which still blows my mind.  He had a good run selling phone book ads, and gave it up a few years back. The market deteriorates every year, as advertisers become more convinced that they are wasting their money. Every market has  multiple publishers fighting for the same dollars. Successful sales require convincing businesses that it's risky to not be in YOUR book, since you have the one the public is actually NOT going to throw out, and instilling fear based on the "fact" that your competitors bought huge ads this year, and you will be committing suicide by not even being on the page, when the customer is trying to find you.  Naturally, this is done to the constant beating by management, who is disappointed that your numbers are not increasing by double digits, like they projected, but falling. MY bro. might be one slippery bugger, but he is smart, and he knew when to abandon ship.

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #667 on: August 09, 2016, 07:01:00 AM »
I wish they made it more obvious on how to opt-out of phone books (seriously!), but I'm glad they still make them.  Some people don't have internet access.
« Last Edit: August 09, 2016, 07:19:42 AM by Ann »

Making Cookies

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #668 on: August 09, 2016, 07:15:46 AM »
Thank you for the opt out link. I'll chase that here in a little bit.

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #669 on: August 09, 2016, 07:47:42 AM »
Ooooh, I can help with this! Go to www.yellowpagesoptout.com and you can get off the delivery lists for phone books. I had to do it a year or so ago--we get 4 *different* phone books every year--what a ridiculous waste of paper.

This one of the few things that I am unable to opt out of.  The phone book companies will bomb the local post office with tons of books, all addressed as "postal customer" and zip code. I have discussed the issue with our local postal employees. They are honest about the fact that they are a bit paranoid with congress attempting to destroy their pensions, and all the other BS their employer dishes out. Their take is that ANY piece of mail, junk or not, is a good thing, so the ritual of hauling a few tons of new phone books off to the recycler is just another way to stay busy, and employed.

*snip*

I feel like everyone would be better served if they just set up a table across from your post office boxes and stacked up books under and on it instead of trying to stuff them in boxes at all.  Also, refuse to accept any books over say 10% added onto what was actually taken last year.  So, if last year people took 50 of the 300 books at the post office, tell the phone book company they won't take more than 55 books.  Tell the company that the removing the books from PO boxes was difficult for their elderly mail recipients, and the books also were a tripping hazard.
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Making Cookies

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #670 on: August 09, 2016, 07:57:43 AM »
Done! Opted out. Easy peasy.

infogoon

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #671 on: August 09, 2016, 10:48:28 AM »
Wait, if you opt out of getting a phone book, what does your kid sit on for his haircuts?

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #672 on: August 09, 2016, 11:18:36 AM »
Wait, if you opt out of getting a phone book, what does your kid sit on for his haircuts?
LadyMuMu's MIL's Encyclopedia Britannica.
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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #673 on: August 09, 2016, 12:53:43 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

That was my thing - he didn't thumb through them at all!! He moved them from his dad's attic to his, and there they'll stay until their kids empty out that house.

My FIL is a hoarder, and one of the things I dread most in life is having to clean out his house when he is gone. I hope things work out in a way that I don't have to be involved.

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #674 on: August 09, 2016, 03:37:55 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

That was my thing - he didn't thumb through them at all!! He moved them from his dad's attic to his, and there they'll stay until their kids empty out that house.

My FIL is a hoarder, and one of the things I dread most in life is having to clean out his house when he is gone. I hope things work out in a way that I don't have to be involved.

Doh! I see a divorce on the horizon!
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Making Cookies

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #675 on: August 09, 2016, 03:43:21 PM »
Just call the local fire dept. Maybe they'd like to use the house for a training day. That is literally what happened here once.

LeRainDrop

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #676 on: August 09, 2016, 03:59:28 PM »
My FIL is a hoarder, and one of the things I dread most in life is having to clean out his house when he is gone. I hope things work out in a way that I don't have to be involved.

Just call the local fire dept. Maybe they'd like to use the house for a training day. That is literally what happened here once.

Interesting.  I remember seeing on one of the Hoarders TV shows how dangerous hoarded homes are for fire-fighters.  IIRC, they may have condemned a home or taken it off the list of places where the fire department would enter due to the extreme danger that the interior conditions posed.  Sorry if their house burns, but I wouldn't want a fire-fighter to risk their life trying to get through all the booby-traps.

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #677 on: August 09, 2016, 05:56:45 PM »
My FIL is a hoarder, and one of the things I dread most in life is having to clean out his house when he is gone. I hope things work out in a way that I don't have to be involved.

Just call the local fire dept. Maybe they'd like to use the house for a training day. That is literally what happened here once.

Interesting.  I remember seeing on one of the Hoarders TV shows how dangerous hoarded homes are for fire-fighters.  IIRC, they may have condemned a home or taken it off the list of places where the fire department would enter due to the extreme danger that the interior conditions posed.  Sorry if their house burns, but I wouldn't want a fire-fighter to risk their life trying to get through all the booby-traps.
This all makes me grateful for how my parents live:  they're getting up in years, and they've been steadily decluttering their home, shipping and/or delivering boxes of their kids stuff to all the kids, getting rid of lots of old stuff, etc.  A couple months ago, Mom brought me a 12" stack of my kindergarten schoolwork. DW and I had an enjoyable half hour going through it, and we kept a few things, but tossed the rest. 

Now I'll admit that my parents have something like 60 years of National Geographic on their basement shelves, but it's all very neatly organized and out of the way.  And they religiously avoid bringing more clutter into their home, barring personal sentimental items.

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #678 on: August 10, 2016, 08:30:49 AM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

That was my thing - he didn't thumb through them at all!! He moved them from his dad's attic to his, and there they'll stay until their kids empty out that house.

I feel their pain. I've spent a significant amount of time this week trying to convince my MIL that her Encyclopedia Brittanica is not worth keeping when she downsizes into a 1-br apartment from a 3,000 sq ft home. I made the mistake of saying something like, with Google and Wikipedia, they don't even make those any longer. Her response? Well, then they'll be valuable one day! Argh! Even the used bookstore and the Goodwill won't take them!

As technology marches on, LOL. I have a box in the local post office, since our neighborhood cannot get delivery to individual houses. every year, at least two idiot phone book companies pay the post office to deliver a metric shit ton of their latest phone books. This involves the local postal employees being forced to stuff thousands of books into  PO BOXES that are too small, and pissing off hundreds of customers who have to dig them out of the boxes and stack them on the floor, any available counter space, and wherever there is room to  leave them behind at the post office. The vast majority of the customer base has zero interest in a phone book, but the publishers still trick idiot businesses into spending silly amounts to advertise, based on the huge volume of books they place in every home in the area. The USPS then pays a recycling outfit to pick up a few thousand pounds of worthless phone books. It's capitalism at it's best.

I love phone books!  Every year right about the start of winter, 3 or more companies send me their phone books.  I stack them neatly beside the wood stove.  Every new fire gets 10-15 pages to get the kindling going.  It's much neater and compact than a big stack of newspapers.
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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #679 on: August 10, 2016, 08:37:39 AM »
Eternal Wonderer ...........this is a terrible story!
I am so sorry you had to put up with this "stinkin thinking".
May this be resolved in your favour, soon.
Good Luck.

mm1970

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #680 on: August 10, 2016, 08:45:15 AM »
Eternal Wonderer ...........this is a terrible story!
I am so sorry you had to put up with this "stinkin thinking".
May this be resolved in your favour, soon.
Good Luck.
I agree.  I hope you are able to find some legal help.  I would like to think that the law in Canada would require his assets go to his children, but I don't really know.

Captain FIRE

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #681 on: August 10, 2016, 09:40:29 AM »
Eternal Wonderer ...........this is a terrible story!
I am so sorry you had to put up with this "stinkin thinking".
May this be resolved in your favour, soon.
Good Luck.
I agree.  I hope you are able to find some legal help.  I would like to think that the law in Canada would require his assets go to his children, but I don't really know.

It's possible.  A quick google search pulls this up: http://www.lbwlawyers.com/publications/child-and-spousal-support-obligations-after-death/  I have no idea if it's accurate or not (and what province you are in), but Eternal Wonder, you should look into it.  And quickly, as you probably need to file a timely claim against the estate.  Does the $40k cover the remaining child support obligation or does it fall short?

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #682 on: August 10, 2016, 09:51:47 AM »
Eternal Wonderer ...........this is a terrible story!
I am so sorry you had to put up with this "stinkin thinking".
May this be resolved in your favour, soon.
Good Luck.
I agree.  I hope you are able to find some legal help.  I would like to think that the law in Canada would require his assets go to his children, but I don't really know.

It depends on the province you live in. Ottawa's in Ontario so that's the provincial law that will apply.

Much may depend on whether he had a will. But she'll want to get a lawyer who works pro bono or on contingency because fights like this can be drawn out and expensive.
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Captain FIRE

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #683 on: August 10, 2016, 02:04:09 PM »
It's true you can disinherit adult children - it's the minor part that throws a wrench into things.  Bad advice though regardless, to not consider all facts.

Also see if Canada has state support as well.  In the US, kids can collect social security due to their deceased parent.

hoping2retire35

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #684 on: August 10, 2016, 08:06:35 PM »
EW, you may want to post your situation under the "ask a mustacian" section. Likely to get a much more thorough response. I hope things get better.

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #685 on: August 11, 2016, 01:33:17 AM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

That was my thing - he didn't thumb through them at all!! He moved them from his dad's attic to his, and there they'll stay until their kids empty out that house.

I feel their pain. I've spent a significant amount of time this week trying to convince my MIL that her Encyclopedia Brittanica is not worth keeping when she downsizes into a 1-br apartment from a 3,000 sq ft home. I made the mistake of saying something like, with Google and Wikipedia, they don't even make those any longer. Her response? Well, then they'll be valuable one day! Argh! Even the used bookstore and the Goodwill won't take them!

If I lived near your MIL, I would not only take that EB set, I'd pay her for it!!  I deeply regret not taking my parents' set when they downsized in a move.  It's a nostalgia thing for me, and kind of a decor thing I guess, not a research tool. 

Villanelle

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #686 on: August 11, 2016, 01:40:27 AM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

That was my thing - he didn't thumb through them at all!! He moved them from his dad's attic to his, and there they'll stay until their kids empty out that house.

I feel their pain. I've spent a significant amount of time this week trying to convince my MIL that her Encyclopedia Brittanica is not worth keeping when she downsizes into a 1-br apartment from a 3,000 sq ft home. I made the mistake of saying something like, with Google and Wikipedia, they don't even make those any longer. Her response? Well, then they'll be valuable one day! Argh! Even the used bookstore and the Goodwill won't take them!

If I lived near your MIL, I would not only take that EB set, I'd pay her for it!!  I deeply regret not taking my parents' set when they downsized in a move.  It's a nostalgia thing for me, and kind of a decor thing I guess, not a research tool.  Sadly, the cost to ship something that large and heavy would no doubt be prohibitive

Making Cookies

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #687 on: August 11, 2016, 07:13:29 AM »
Wait, if you opt out of getting a phone book, what does your kid sit on for his haircuts?

Our dog of course. (I like a challenge...)

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #688 on: August 11, 2016, 12:57:57 PM »
I feel their pain. I've spent a significant amount of time this week trying to convince my MIL that her Encyclopedia Brittanica is not worth keeping when she downsizes into a 1-br apartment from a 3,000 sq ft home. I made the mistake of saying something like, with Google and Wikipedia, they don't even make those any longer. Her response? Well, then they'll be valuable one day! Argh! Even the used bookstore and the Goodwill won't take them!

If I lived near your MIL, I would not only take that EB set, I'd pay her for it!!  I deeply regret not taking my parents' set when they downsized in a move.  It's a nostalgia thing for me, and kind of a decor thing I guess, not a research tool.  Sadly, the cost to ship something that large and heavy would no doubt be prohibitive

If you want one, keep an eye on CraigsList and maybe make a post requesting one.  People are giving them away or selling them very cheap.  Also look out for any schools or libraries in your area that are moving, renovating, etc.  Go to your library's annual used book sale, if they do that (most libraries in my area do this, usually from books donated for the purpose).  When my high school was building a new library, they gave away a bunch of books (including two full encyclopedias) rather than move them.
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AlanStache

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #689 on: August 11, 2016, 02:11:21 PM »
I feel their pain. I've spent a significant amount of time this week trying to convince my MIL that her Encyclopedia Brittanica is not worth keeping when she downsizes into a 1-br apartment from a 3,000 sq ft home. I made the mistake of saying something like, with Google and Wikipedia, they don't even make those any longer. Her response? Well, then they'll be valuable one day! Argh! Even the used bookstore and the Goodwill won't take them!

If I lived near your MIL, I would not only take that EB set, I'd pay her for it!!  I deeply regret not taking my parents' set when they downsized in a move.  It's a nostalgia thing for me, and kind of a decor thing I guess, not a research tool.  Sadly, the cost to ship something that large and heavy would no doubt be prohibitive

If you want one, keep an eye on CraigsList and maybe make a post requesting one.  People are giving them away or selling them very cheap.  Also look out for any schools or libraries in your area that are moving, renovating, etc.  Go to your library's annual used book sale, if they do that (most libraries in my area do this, usually from books donated for the purpose).  When my high school was building a new library, they gave away a bunch of books (including two full encyclopedias) rather than move them.

Also try calling the local second hand book stores. 

ebay has the last edition printings going for 7500$, might have been worth buying a few copy's of the last run to hold onto unopened just to create some inheritance drama in 100 years.  I can see some great grand kids and inlaws arguing over if the books should be deviled over up by count or pound or should Sally get the S's cuz her names starts with S ...
« Last Edit: August 11, 2016, 02:17:56 PM by AlanStache »
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cloudsail

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #690 on: August 11, 2016, 02:53:15 PM »
So I have a situation, I wouldn't exactly call it drama, maybe I just need to vent.

My MIL passed away earlier this year. She fought lung cancer for a year, so before she died she was very explicit about how she wanted things distributed. They have three kids, my husband is the youngest. She willed an apartment in Taipei to their daughter, who currently lives there. It's worth approximately $800,000. She willed their primary residence in Vancouver BC to the oldest son. It was purchased for approximately $1.6M. She wanted my BIL to give us $800,000 CDN as half the value of the house.

Now my husband has this extreme aversion to taking money from his relatives. It really just makes him feel bad. At first he said he didn't want any of it, and that his brother had a right to the house since he was going to be living in it with their dad and taking care of him. But obviously my MIL was not going to agree to not leaving her youngest anything. She was very insistent on everything being equal. So we said okay.

My BIL is an upstanding guy and even before my MIL passed has been asking us to setup a Canadian dollar account so he can wire the money to us. But my husband has been trying to avoid it. He basically just changes the subject whenever his brother brings it up. I talked about going to the nearest HSBC and setting up an account but he never seems to want to do it. There was also talk about buying property on Vancouver Island, at which point he actually expressed the wish for his brother to retain ownership of any properties purchased. So essentially he just doesn't want the money.

We are very stable financially and well on our way to FI in about six years, but $800,000 CDN is a lot of money. Even just sitting in a savings account at 1% interest that's $8000 a year. Knowing my BIL he would try very hard to get the money to us, but it kind of galls me that that kind of money meanwhile is just sitting there. Also I'm not sure how hard he would try if my husband just doesn't want to cooperate. My fear is that eventually the issue might just die.

Anyway, that's the inheritance drama in my life right now, and yes, I'm aware that it lies entirely with my husband.

LeRainDrop

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #691 on: August 11, 2016, 03:23:15 PM »
Anyway, that's the inheritance drama in my life right now, and yes, I'm aware that it lies entirely with my husband.

What in the world could be causing your husband to want to dishonor his mother's wishes for distribution of her assets?  And to instigate an unnecessary conflict with his brother, who just wants to put this all to rest?

cloudsail

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #692 on: August 11, 2016, 04:35:28 PM »
Anyway, that's the inheritance drama in my life right now, and yes, I'm aware that it lies entirely with my husband.

What in the world could be causing your husband to want to dishonor his mother's wishes for distribution of her assets?  And to instigate an unnecessary conflict with his brother, who just wants to put this all to rest?

He has self esteem issues, and defines success as making his own fortune. Receiving money from his parents makes him feel like a failure, and the greater the amount of money the bigger of a failure it makes him feel.

He's also not very empathic and has trouble looking at things from other people's point of view -- for example, his brother's, who is even better off than we are financially and probably doesn't feel great hanging on to money that his late mother designated to his younger brother. Or his late mom's, who wanted each of her children to equally inherit her wealth, as any parent of multiple children should understand.

IndyPendent

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #693 on: August 11, 2016, 08:00:05 PM »


He has self esteem issues, and defines success as making his own fortune. Receiving money from his parents makes him feel like a failure, and the greater the amount of money the bigger of a failure it makes him feel.

He's also not very empathic and has trouble looking at things from other people's point of view -- for example, his brother's, who is even better off than we are financially and probably doesn't feel great hanging on to money that his late mother designated to his younger brother. Or his late mom's, who wanted each of her children to equally inherit her wealth, as any parent of multiple children should understand.

He should accept it and give it to a willing recipient. I'll volunteer.


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TomTX

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #694 on: August 11, 2016, 08:56:36 PM »
50 years of back-issues of the Sears catalogue

I have to admit, I would find it pretty entertaining to thumb through those. But not enough to store or move them.

For several years I provided housing to a pile of NatGeo mags. I kept the most interesting dozen and gave the rest away. You can get the whole collection on DVD for cheap.

Yeah, I agreed she could get the DVD.

Then she still hung onto the paper mags.  Arg.

Villanelle

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #695 on: August 11, 2016, 09:48:21 PM »
I feel their pain. I've spent a significant amount of time this week trying to convince my MIL that her Encyclopedia Brittanica is not worth keeping when she downsizes into a 1-br apartment from a 3,000 sq ft home. I made the mistake of saying something like, with Google and Wikipedia, they don't even make those any longer. Her response? Well, then they'll be valuable one day! Argh! Even the used bookstore and the Goodwill won't take them!

If I lived near your MIL, I would not only take that EB set, I'd pay her for it!!  I deeply regret not taking my parents' set when they downsized in a move.  It's a nostalgia thing for me, and kind of a decor thing I guess, not a research tool.  Sadly, the cost to ship something that large and heavy would no doubt be prohibitive

If you want one, keep an eye on CraigsList and maybe make a post requesting one.  People are giving them away or selling them very cheap.  Also look out for any schools or libraries in your area that are moving, renovating, etc.  Go to your library's annual used book sale, if they do that (most libraries in my area do this, usually from books donated for the purpose).  When my high school was building a new library, they gave away a bunch of books (including two full encyclopedias) rather than move them.

Sadly, I'm in Japan, so any set I might manage to track down probably wouldn't be quite what I wanted.  Actually, having a Japanese set would be kind of cool, but it's not what I truly want.

My parents live in a retirement community, which seems like it would have a lot of encyclopedia sets floating around, and there are lots of estate sales.  When I'm closer to the dye we move back Stateside, I'll ask mom to keep a look out.  I don't want them to have to house it for 3 years, but 6-8 months they would do happily. 

Making Cookies

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #696 on: August 12, 2016, 08:07:28 AM »
Anyway, that's the inheritance drama in my life right now, and yes, I'm aware that it lies entirely with my husband.

What in the world could be causing your husband to want to dishonor his mother's wishes for distribution of her assets?  And to instigate an unnecessary conflict with his brother, who just wants to put this all to rest?

He has self esteem issues, and defines success as making his own fortune. Receiving money from his parents makes him feel like a failure, and the greater the amount of money the bigger of a failure it makes him feel.

He's also not very empathic and has trouble looking at things from other people's point of view -- for example, his brother's, who is even better off than we are financially and probably doesn't feel great hanging on to money that his late mother designated to his younger brother. Or his late mom's, who wanted each of her children to equally inherit her wealth, as any parent of multiple children should understand.

Take it, put it in a separate account and let it grow separately than the money you've made/saved/invested.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #697 on: August 12, 2016, 08:41:14 AM »
Anyway, that's the inheritance drama in my life right now, and yes, I'm aware that it lies entirely with my husband.

What in the world could be causing your husband to want to dishonor his mother's wishes for distribution of her assets?  And to instigate an unnecessary conflict with his brother, who just wants to put this all to rest?

He has self esteem issues, and defines success as making his own fortune. Receiving money from his parents makes him feel like a failure, and the greater the amount of money the bigger of a failure it makes him feel.

He's also not very empathic and has trouble looking at things from other people's point of view -- for example, his brother's, who is even better off than we are financially and probably doesn't feel great hanging on to money that his late mother designated to his younger brother. Or his late mom's, who wanted each of her children to equally inherit her wealth, as any parent of multiple children should understand.

Take it, put it in a separate account and let it grow separately than the money you've made/saved/invested.
That's what I would suggest.  Let the money sit there unmolested until emotions have plenty of time to settle.  It's not like you're in desperate need of that money now.  And you could always give it back later if, a few years down the road, that's what you want to do.

talltexan

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #698 on: August 12, 2016, 08:43:02 AM »
I suspect your husband wants to be able to say--when you FIRE'd--that you did it all on your own. Is this money sufficient that you'd be done early? Indeed there does seem to be a hangup there.

FIPurpose

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Re: Inheritance Drama: You Got Any? Stories Wanted.
« Reply #699 on: August 12, 2016, 08:43:11 AM »
Setup an investment endowment for something that your husband or his mother really care about. Take that money and start a charity investment .
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