Author Topic: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!  (Read 5935 times)

frugalfoothills

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I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« on: November 27, 2018, 11:30:11 AM »
Colleague of mine left our company in January to take a job at a competitor making $110,000 per year. She lives in a paid for home (willed to her by her aunt) so no mortgage, has no kids, and is able to work from home. Honestly, the dream.

Her: "I can not stop shopping. It's becoming a problem. I spent $2,000 at the outlets yesterday and I don't even know what I got!"

Me: "Ouch. That's rough."

Her: "I know. I NEED retail therapy, though. This job is just so boring and my boss is nuts. I am looking for other options but I can't find anything that can support my lifestyle. I need this salary."

Me: "Really?? You have no mortgage, no kids, and make 6 figures. I would think you would have tons of excess cash saved up so you have options if you want to leave."

Her: "I haven't actually saved anything this year. My company doesn't even offer a 401k plan so I haven't even done that."

Me: "........... so you have saved NOTHING? Not even cash savings? For ELEVEN MONTHS? What the hell are you buying????"

Her: "No! Ha ha ha! I know I'm so terrible! Clothes, bags, shoes, trips, gifts for my neice, you know... stuff like that. Shopping is the only way I can cope with this job, though! I have to spend it because I might not always be making this much!"

Me: *rolls off my barstool and dies*

Just Joe

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #1 on: November 27, 2018, 12:32:30 PM »
Addiction...

aurorarouge

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #2 on: November 27, 2018, 12:34:11 PM »
The rage-sadness is just too much here. I'll just have to stick with "gasping fish mouth noise" until my brain reassembles.

MgoSam

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #3 on: November 27, 2018, 01:09:01 PM »
I feel bad reading stories like this. Shopping wont' make her happy, in fact it'll make her more miserable due to the law of diminishing returns. And this is costing her a buttload, so after she hopefully recovers from her addiction she will still be out a ton of money.

frugalfoothills

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #4 on: November 27, 2018, 01:16:44 PM »
Addiction...

You're not wrong. She posted a video on Instagram and said "only halfway done!" It was this huge pile of gifts all wrapped under the tree for her niece, friends, etc. I mean absolutely ENORMOUS. My mouth actually fell open.

THEN the camera panned away and there were MORE gifts all lined up along the wall and spanning into her dining room because she ran out of room under the tree.

"HALFWAY DONE" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ketchup

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #5 on: November 27, 2018, 01:19:46 PM »
Yeah... this sounds like a problem that needs to be addressed by someone with M.D. after their name.

Dave1442397

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #6 on: November 27, 2018, 05:40:20 PM »
The CIO at my last company (small company) was moving house, and a few people said they'd help her pack. They reported back that her three-bedroom house was packed with clothes. Every closet stuffed, the two extra bedrooms full of industrial clothing racks on wheels, boxes of shoes and purses everywhere.

She also still owned a house in TX. When asked why she didn't just sell it, she said she couldn't, because it was full of stuff she "couldn't" get rid of.

She was making $230k/yr back then, and was single, in her fifties. I guess retail therapy was her way of dealing with things.

Just Joe

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #7 on: November 28, 2018, 09:57:08 AM »
WOW...

eljefe-speaks

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #8 on: November 29, 2018, 09:43:49 AM »
Can we start calling being "bored" at work what it is actually is? It is a blessing! How many laborers around the world would consider it an unimaginable fantasy to get paid for doing nothing?

dcheesi

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #9 on: November 29, 2018, 09:58:26 AM »
Can we start calling being "bored" at work what it is actually is? It is a blessing! How many laborers around the world would consider it an unimaginable fantasy to get paid for doing nothing?
True, but the fantasy and the reality can be quite different. Being paid to do nothing sounds great, but if you're not allowed to do anything else productive with your time, it can quickly become mind-numbingly monotonous.

Maenad

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #10 on: November 29, 2018, 10:59:48 AM »
And if you have to job search again in the future, what do you put on your resume? What's a hiring manager supposed to think of someone who was bored out of their mind, but didn't try to get more work or leave to do something productive?

eljefe-speaks

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #11 on: November 29, 2018, 02:51:19 PM »
And if you have to job search again in the future, what do you put on your resume? What's a hiring manager supposed to think of someone who was bored out of their mind, but didn't try to get more work or leave to do something productive?

I think the doing nothing is almost always under the radar. There is a "official" job title and "official" duties and that title and those duties go on the resume. I am too lazy to look up the source but somebody wrote something about bullshit jobs, about how many people are doing much less work thanks to technology and automation. It's not talked about. We all play the game and go through the motions.

@dcheesi, absolutely true, but I would rather do nothing than dangerous and potentially disabling labor for 12, 16 hours a day.

Hope I didn't derail this one!

Warlord1986

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #12 on: December 02, 2018, 01:10:31 PM »
I feel sorry for that woman. :/

Bumperpuff

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #13 on: December 03, 2018, 08:44:02 AM »
And if you have to job search again in the future, what do you put on your resume? What's a hiring manager supposed to think of someone who was bored out of their mind, but didn't try to get more work or leave to do something productive?

I think the doing nothing is almost always under the radar. There is a "official" job title and "official" duties and that title and those duties go on the resume. I am too lazy to look up the source but somebody wrote something about bullshit jobs, about how many people are doing much less work thanks to technology and automation. It's not talked about. We all play the game and go through the motions.

@dcheesi, absolutely true, but I would rather do nothing than dangerous and potentially disabling labor for 12, 16 hours a day.

Hope I didn't derail this one!

https://www.npr.org/2018/08/28/642706138/bs-jobs-how-meaningless-work-wears-us-down
That’s a podcast I think you’re referring to.

Rather than “retail therapy” she could go to actual therapy. That might help her find a better way of dealing with her issues and help save money.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #14 on: December 05, 2018, 07:43:23 AM »
Can we start calling being "bored" at work what it is actually is? It is a blessing! How many laborers around the world would consider it an unimaginable fantasy to get paid for doing nothing?
True, but the fantasy and the reality can be quite different. Being paid to do nothing sounds great, but if you're not allowed to do anything else productive with your time, it can quickly become mind-numbingly monotonous.
Agreed, but there's always something one can do to occupy one's mind. At my last job I had enough freedom at times that I could work other side projects or educate myself. When u didn't have that freedom, I could still use a notebook to jot down notes or sketches

RWD

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #15 on: December 05, 2018, 08:10:27 AM »
Her: "I have to spend it because I might not always be making this much!"

That mentality is so sad. And the exact opposite of what she should be thinking: "I have to save it because I might not always be making this much!". She can always spend it later...

partgypsy

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #16 on: December 05, 2018, 10:26:12 AM »
OK, am I missing something? She spends so much because she basically dislikes her job. If she dislikes her job that much, then wouldn't you be motivated to save as much as possible so you DON'T have to do that job in the future? But then she also said she has to keep the job because no other job would fund her lifestyle. Which means it's not the job, it's her. She is going to be in a world full of hurt if/when she loses this job. No money saved, and all her self worth is based on spending money.

Rife

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #17 on: December 06, 2018, 08:44:20 PM »
It is sad cause she is actually identifying the problem fairly well. Her out of control consumerism is causing her to be chained to a job she doesn't like while not doing her any good (doesn't even remember what she bought). Maybe losing her job and facing harsh reality could help her come around or just losing her "lifestyle" and realizing she is still just as happy or more so.

YW55

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Re: I need to spend $100k/yr to make this job bearable!
« Reply #18 on: January 03, 2019, 11:55:21 AM »
I can see how someone could have this problem. When I get a package in the mail I get a temporary high from it because I'm getting something for myself. But usually that high is short lived. So she's shopping to chase that consumerism high but the stress of her job made her keep coming back.

I've stopped buying things I don't really need after identifying this issue. An Instant Pot or an Air Fryer can be really tempting during holiday sales but I don't really need it and just finding excuses for myself to get it. The first step is to identify the issue.