Author Topic: Getting ATTACKED on social media  (Read 8888 times)

thesis

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #50 on: July 17, 2018, 09:19:57 AM »
I like facepunches. I seem to respond better to cold hard truths than I do soft-spoken suggestions. Or at least I say I do when I'm searching for it myself ;)

I mean, there are plenty of criticisms of this board itself, the Antimustachian Wall of Shame. Some say it's just looking down on others to feel better about oneself. I can see this as being true at times, but there's also a lot of 'stupid' in the world and it's nice getting new perspectives on how to recognize that 'stupid'. Sometimes you do just need a place to vent, too. There really is so much defeatism in our culture.

I've just had to accept the fact that most people do not respond well to hard truths. Some people really are idiots with money, others just never had the proper context to begin thinking about money. I want to be safe space for my friends, so I've changed my tone to one of "here's information that may be helpful you if you are interested". I jump on this forum when I start feeling angry at the world :D

MgoSam

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #51 on: July 17, 2018, 10:30:46 AM »

Then my wife was giving advice how to save money on baby expenses to some moms, then the subject turned into the government should just pay for it why should I worry... Then it turned into a ranting fest how the government doesn't provide diapers wah wah wah....

Does any country actually do this? I'm especially surprised to hear this coming from Americans, who in my experience tend to regard the government giving people stuff as tantamount to communism.

It's only communism when other people get stuff from the government. When they themselves get stuff from the government it's because they "paid into the system" or some other bullshit.

TheGrimSqueaker

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #52 on: July 17, 2018, 12:42:43 PM »
I like facepunches. I seem to respond better to cold hard truths than I do soft-spoken suggestions. Or at least I say I do when I'm searching for it myself ;)

When people are looking for a solution to a specific problem they have, or making a deliberate attempt to improve themselves, I find they are not disposed to be hurt or offended by the direct approach. They are in an emotional state where they're receptive, and they put themselves into that emotional state without my help. A person in that emotional state will *pay* for criticism and feedback (even if it's negative) from people qualified to give it.

What gets people in trouble, in business and elsewhere, is using the direct approach to criticize someone who is not in the emotional state I described above, or who is open to feedback from people qualified to give it. A person who does not believe there is a problem, or who does not agree that the problem is what the critic says it is, or who does not wish to solve the problem because there is a more pressing issue, is not receptive. Substantial amounts of business interaction fall into the "we are not here to solve a problem" category. Most people who show up to work aren't there to solve a problem. They're there to do the minimum necessary to take home a paycheck.

Most people who pride themselves on being "brutally honest" get off more on the "brutal" part than anything else, and they tend to have a stunning inability to dish it out without a corresponding ability to take it. When someone else starts to unload unsolicited face-punches, it feels like being kicked while you're down.

FatCat

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #53 on: July 17, 2018, 01:27:57 PM »
Facebook is best for sharing funny memes and pics of your family and pets. If you want to put your financial opinions up, a blog would be best. If you want to post some advice to help people buy the same stuff for less money, people generally respond positively to that. If you ask them to do without something or shame them for not being able to make ends meet with what seems to you like an ample money supply, they'll get defensive. Remember, most people like finding deals because it means they can buy more stuff, not because they can actually accumulate more wealth.

thesis

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #54 on: July 18, 2018, 08:06:46 AM »
I like facepunches. I seem to respond better to cold hard truths than I do soft-spoken suggestions. Or at least I say I do when I'm searching for it myself ;)

When people are looking for a solution to a specific problem they have, or making a deliberate attempt to improve themselves, I find they are not disposed to be hurt or offended by the direct approach. They are in an emotional state where they're receptive, and they put themselves into that emotional state without my help. A person in that emotional state will *pay* for criticism and feedback (even if it's negative) from people qualified to give it.

What gets people in trouble, in business and elsewhere, is using the direct approach to criticize someone who is not in the emotional state I described above, or who is open to feedback from people qualified to give it. A person who does not believe there is a problem, or who does not agree that the problem is what the critic says it is, or who does not wish to solve the problem because there is a more pressing issue, is not receptive. Substantial amounts of business interaction fall into the "we are not here to solve a problem" category. Most people who show up to work aren't there to solve a problem. They're there to do the minimum necessary to take home a paycheck.

Most people who pride themselves on being "brutally honest" get off more on the "brutal" part than anything else, and they tend to have a stunning inability to dish it out without a corresponding ability to take it. When someone else starts to unload unsolicited face-punches, it feels like being kicked while you're down.

+1. That's a good way of putting it

carolina822

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #55 on: August 07, 2018, 11:25:35 PM »

Then my wife was giving advice how to save money on baby expenses to some moms, then the subject turned into the government should just pay for it why should I worry... Then it turned into a ranting fest how the government doesn't provide diapers wah wah wah....

Does any country actually do this? I'm especially surprised to hear this coming from Americans, who in my experience tend to regard the government giving people stuff as tantamount to communism.



In my experience there are some like you described, but also quite a large number that feels like the government should give them free everything.

...and then vote for the guy that is least likely to deliver anything like that. I'm surrounded by people who in one sentence will complain about those darn socialists and then shortly after talk about how the gov't ought to do things for them...

 I heard there is a large forum of people that think it is moral to have $1M + of investments and have their healthcare subsidized by a hardworking, taxpaying family of 4 earning $50,000 a year.


Everything I am referring to regarding the abuse of welfare is ILLEGAL... However, what you mentioned is LEGAL use of the laws.... Laws are laws, hence one reason why rich always stay ahead of the game, they "follow the law" and completely understand it and use it to their advantage.

It's illegal to not marry your babydaddy that makes 70k a year? Sounds more like "follow the law and use it to their advantage" to me, but hey, they're poor so they can fuck clean off, right?

Paul der Krake

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #56 on: August 07, 2018, 11:35:32 PM »
Have you guys heard about Linux? It's this operating system that's superior in every way to Microsoft Windows.

Just Joe

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #57 on: August 08, 2018, 07:34:55 AM »
Linux! Wahoo!!! - - okay, okay. I'm done cheerleading. Seriously - Linux is a great solution my family has used for about 20 years now. I'd be glad to tutor anyone here that has questions.

Dicey

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #58 on: August 10, 2018, 10:33:24 AM »
I read every blog on the Mustacian form [sic]...

However, just like the blog, it is outcastlier talk... it is a different way of life... ..
FTFY  - I may be an outlier, but I am no outcast.

OvertheRainbow

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Re: Getting ATTACKED on social media
« Reply #59 on: August 10, 2018, 11:15:06 AM »
Ok, Mr. World Traveler, I'll level with you:

I too have seen extreme poverty, having been to India, China, Morocco, Brazil, Mexico and many other countries with poorer areas. While we are lucky to have a safety net, America is one of the richest countries in the world. We can do so much better. Our healthcare is ridiculous and medical issues are among the top reasons people lose their homes and file for bankruptcy. College is becoming too expensive and many kids are coming out in so much debt that they can't get ahead.

Many other wealthy nations are looking at us and laughing. Laughing at how we boast about being the best nation in the world yet can't give all our citizens basic necessities such as healthcare and access decent and affordable education. To top it off, the American worker isn't even entitled to PTO or paid parental leave.

The average household income is less than 60k gross. If there are any children, that money doesn't go far. Add a kid with special needs or chronic health issues, you could easily be toasted.

And then there is the fact that the playing field in America isn't level. Minorities, women, women of color, older workers, disabled people and other disadvantaged groups have an uphill battle in a workforce riddled with discrimination and office politics, making it harder to get higher paying jobs or jobs with decent benefits.

You come off as very condescending and judgemental. That is why you were ripped to shreds on social media. Not everyone is a complainypants with high incomes and stupid spending habits. Many are struggling to survive and obtain the basics, let alone have enough to save for retirement and other long-term goals.