Author Topic: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy  (Read 36936 times)

401Killer

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Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« on: April 10, 2018, 07:27:07 AM »
Figure this would be a great place to post some really funny "deals" or products that make us giggle. I'll start!


Below is Evian Facial Spray, I've actually found single, 1.7oz bottles of this for sale on the interwebs for $9.99 a bottle. This stuff is simple mineral water in a spray bottle. At that price they are basically selling mineral water for $752 a gallon!!!

I think the best part of it all is what happens when you spell Evian backward...



At least you can pick it up on Amazon right now for a highly discounted price of $15 for 3.4oz, or $564 a gallon!

https://www.amazon.com/evian-Natural-Mineral-Facial-Travel/dp/B001PMIN10/ref=sr_1_2_sspa?ie=UTF8&qid=1523366667&sr=8-2-spons&keywords=evian%2Bfacial%2Bspray&th=1
« Last Edit: April 10, 2018, 07:39:12 AM by 401Killer »

401Killer

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #1 on: April 10, 2018, 07:38:21 AM »
Here's another one, this one I laughed not just about the cost of the expensive watch, but the bottom section that reads "Customers who viewed this item also bought". FREE SHIPPING AS WELL!!
 
Rolex Men's 18K Gold Rolex Yachtmaster II Model # 116688
3.7 out of 5 stars    103 customer reviews 
Price:   $36,496.90 & FREE Shipping



https://www.amazon.com/Mens-Rolex-Yachtmaster-Model-116688/dp/B004GYXO9U/ref=pd_sbs_watch_2?ie=UTF8&refRID=1AJYM80Y2XPKF3BM7ZQ5

For some more laughs, read the 1 Star comment section!

ruffles

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eljefe-speaks

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #3 on: April 10, 2018, 11:07:36 AM »
Without a doubt, no product causes me more dismay than Yeti coolers. The concept of a "luxury" cooler is just mind-boggling.

Also up there would be ~$10,000 bicycles. Diminishing returns much? A pro would still wax your ass riding a thrift store huffy beach cruiser. (In fact that would be pretty damn fun to watch.)

Edit to add (regarding Yeti):

... and to the "oh, but they're BEAR PROOF" crowd. What about this one? Is this $200 cooler bear proof?

https://www.amazon.com/YETI-Hopper-Portable-Cooler-Tahoe/dp/B00SU9AHEC/ref=sr_1_4?s=sporting-goods&ie=UTF8&qid=1523380123&sr=1-4&keywords=yeti+cooler
« Last Edit: April 10, 2018, 11:11:35 AM by eljefe-speaks »

401Killer

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #4 on: April 10, 2018, 11:49:57 AM »
Gläce Luxury Ice!

http://www.glaceice.net/purchase.html

All for the low low price of $325!!! You get 25 round and 25 cube shaped pieces!

Hell of a way to add $6.50 to every drink someone has.



Quote
Gläce Luxury Ice enables premium spirits consumers to have a consistent drink-ice brand to pair with their cocktails. Purified of minerals, additives and other pollutants that may contaminate the taste of premium spirits and drinks, Gläce Ice pieces are meticulously crafted to deliver the finest complement to top shelf liquors. Each piece is individually carved and designed to offer a cocktail presentation that inspires and intrigues.

« Last Edit: April 11, 2018, 12:50:34 PM by 401Killer »

PoutineLover

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #5 on: April 10, 2018, 11:53:08 AM »
Temperature controlled thermos and mugs. Can also purchase 24k gold halo lid.

https://ember.com/

"It’s like the Apple Watch of tumblers."
- Cosmopolitan

401Killer

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #6 on: April 10, 2018, 11:57:33 AM »
Temperature controlled thermos and mugs. Can also purchase 24k gold halo lid.

https://ember.com/

"It’s like the Apple Watch of tumblers."
- Cosmopolitan

Wow! The ceramic mug is $80 and the tumbler is $150!

Kind of cool though, haha.


Davnasty

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #7 on: April 10, 2018, 12:02:52 PM »
Without a doubt, no product causes me more dismay than Yeti coolers. The concept of a "luxury" cooler is just mind-boggling.

Also up there would be ~$10,000 bicycles. Diminishing returns much? A pro would still wax your ass riding a thrift store huffy beach cruiser. (In fact that would be pretty damn fun to watch.)

Edit to add (regarding Yeti):

... and to the "oh, but they're BEAR PROOF" crowd. What about this one? Is this $200 cooler bear proof?

https://www.amazon.com/YETI-Hopper-Portable-Cooler-Tahoe/dp/B00SU9AHEC/ref=sr_1_4?s=sporting-goods&ie=UTF8&qid=1523380123&sr=1-4&keywords=yeti+cooler

Ha, I won one of those in a raffle at a party and ended up trading it for $100 and two bottles of liquor. People were worried I was drunk (I was :) and didn't know what I was doing because that was a terrible deal. I was just confused, $100 for a cooler seemed pretty fair to me.

Travis

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #8 on: April 10, 2018, 12:05:03 PM »
Gläce Luxury Ice!

http://www.glaceice.net/purchase.html

All for the low low price of $325!!! You get 25 round and 25 cube shaped pieces!

Hell of a way to add $6.5 to every drink someone has.



Quote
Gläce Luxury Ice enables premium spirits consumers to have a consistent drink-ice brand to pair with their cocktails. Purified of minerals, additives and other pollutants that may contaminate the taste of premium spirits and drinks, Gläce Ice pieces are meticulously crafted to deliver the finest complement to top shelf liquors. Each piece is individually carved and designed to offer a cocktail presentation that inspires and intrigues.

Wait, so this is basically a Brita-filtered ice cube tray?

Davnasty

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #9 on: April 10, 2018, 12:10:24 PM »
Gläce Luxury Ice!

http://www.glaceice.net/purchase.html

All for the low low price of $325!!! You get 25 round and 25 cube shaped pieces!

Hell of a way to add $6.5 to every drink someone has.



Quote
Gläce Luxury Ice enables premium spirits consumers to have a consistent drink-ice brand to pair with their cocktails. Purified of minerals, additives and other pollutants that may contaminate the taste of premium spirits and drinks, Gläce Ice pieces are meticulously crafted to deliver the finest complement to top shelf liquors. Each piece is individually carved and designed to offer a cocktail presentation that inspires and intrigues.

Wait, so this is basically a Brita-filtered ice cube tray?

Hate to break it to you... but that's $325 for the actual ice cubes. As in, buying frozen water.

401Killer

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #10 on: April 10, 2018, 12:11:27 PM »

Wait, so this is basically a Brita-filtered ice cube tray?

No, this is just ice, shipped to your door.

Basenji

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #11 on: April 10, 2018, 12:16:13 PM »

Davnasty

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #12 on: April 10, 2018, 12:25:57 PM »

Wait, so this is basically a Brita-filtered ice cube tray?

No, this is just ice, shipped to your door.

And it gets better.

http://www.glaceice.net/responsible-luxury.html

Every time you buy frozen water cubes that get shipped straight to your door in very expensive plastic packaging on a refrigerated truck from California, you can feel good knowing that some unknown portion of that money didn't land in the trash, it actually went to improve drinking water for people in Africa who live off of a fraction of the amount of money you're spending for an annual subscription to have fancy frozen water in your presumably much more expensive intoxicating beverages. Relax, you're a good person now.

Laura33

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #13 on: April 11, 2018, 07:16:33 AM »
Gläce Luxury Ice!

http://www.glaceice.net/purchase.html

All for the low low price of $325!!! You get 25 round and 25 cube shaped pieces!

Hell of a way to add $6.5 to every drink someone has.



Quote
Gläce Luxury Ice enables premium spirits consumers to have a consistent drink-ice brand to pair with their cocktails. Purified of minerals, additives and other pollutants that may contaminate the taste of premium spirits and drinks, Gläce Ice pieces are meticulously crafted to deliver the finest complement to top shelf liquors. Each piece is individually carved and designed to offer a cocktail presentation that inspires and intrigues.

The best part is that they appear to be showing it off with (presumably) high-quality scotch, which should never be served on the rocks.  I mean, if you're going to be a snob, be a real snob.  ;-)

patchyfacialhair

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #14 on: April 11, 2018, 11:33:01 AM »
I'd shamelessly buy the Oreo dunker. But we never have those kinds of cookies in our house, so...I'll just have to dream for now.

Those ice cubes though...dear goodness. It reminds me of the Dave Chappelle skit mocking MTV Cribs, where he says "I sprinkle diamonds on everything I eat...makes my doo doo twinkle"

meghan88

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #15 on: April 11, 2018, 12:23:51 PM »

BDWW

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #16 on: April 11, 2018, 12:42:38 PM »

Wait, so this is basically a Brita-filtered ice cube tray?

No, this is just ice, shipped to your door.

And it gets better.

http://www.glaceice.net/responsible-luxury.html

Every time you buy frozen water cubes that get shipped straight to your door in very expensive plastic packaging on a refrigerated truck from California, you can feel good knowing that some unknown portion of that money didn't land in the trash, it actually went to improve drinking water for people in Africa who live off of a fraction of the amount of money you're spending for an annual subscription to have fancy frozen water in your presumably much more expensive intoxicating beverages. Relax, you're a good person now.

Reminds me of:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ice_trade
Interesting read for people like me that get lost on wikipedia.

Brief synopsis from memory:
Before refrigeration was available/common the ice trade was a pretty big deal. Ice shipped in from cold climates, and distributed on carts around town. People would go and buy a daily allotment of ice from the carts.
Not too far from me is an artificial mountain lake that was used to supply ice to the city in the valley.

Without a doubt, no product causes me more dismay than Yeti coolers. The concept of a "luxury" cooler is just mind-boggling.

Just curious if anyone can recommend a cooler that offers similar performance. I'm not going to buy a Yeti, but they are seriously impressive. My father-in-law has one, and it will keep ice for 3 days in the summer. Where as my coleman/no-name cheap coolers will barely last the day.

/thread-derail

Travis

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #17 on: April 11, 2018, 03:05:11 PM »
I believe this came from this forum last Christmas. A few items on here are cringe-worthy, and the commentary is hilarious.

https://adequateman.deadspin.com/the-2017-hater-s-guide-to-the-williams-sonoma-catalog-1821181135

Just Joe

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #18 on: April 11, 2018, 04:43:08 PM »
Who wouldn't want a nice scented candle for $470? 

https://www.jomalone.com/product/3561/46944/for-the-home/luxury-candles/wild-fig-cassis-luxury-candle

But you get a pack of complimentary matches with it.

Are they artisanal matches though made from organic wood from sustainable forests by an artist's co-op? ;)

facepalm

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #19 on: April 12, 2018, 07:24:48 PM »
Artisanal pencil sharpening.

http://www.artisanalpencilsharpening.com

For $500, he will sharpen your pencil. And PROVIDE the PENCIL!

StockBeard

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #20 on: April 12, 2018, 09:15:38 PM »
For some more laughs, read the 1 Star comment section!

"Now I personally use this watch to keep the orderlies on schedule with washing my yacht, waxing the Bentley(s), and provides added weight to a good strong backhand when my accountant doesn't count my money fast enough."

Brilliant :)

SwordGuy

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #21 on: April 12, 2018, 09:53:25 PM »
There's a company in my neighborhood to come by once a week and wash out and perfume my garbage cans.


UnleashHell

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #22 on: April 13, 2018, 05:40:37 AM »
There's a company in my neighborhood to come by once a week and wash out and perfume my garbage cans.


i'd say thats crazy - but someone has just started doing that here....

Morning Glory

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #23 on: April 13, 2018, 06:56:26 AM »
Have you heard of VI Poo? It's a deodorant that you spray in the toilet to make your shit not stink. The ads hilarious, I thought it was a prank at first.


Lots of everyday things too:
air freshener: why not just clean up the mess instead of covering up the smell with chemicals?

Trash bags: just use grocery bags, the trash won't get as stinky if it is taken out more often, and you aren't buying something just to throw it away

Paper plates: my mom uses these, I don't get it

"Collectibles " of any sort if bought new, it's just a marketing gimmick

Super size fast food meals, unless you are sharing with a friend

SUVs in most circumstances

Already cut up fruit and veg

Leaf blowers

Unnecessarily electric appliances like corkscrews and knives , they don't even save any time

Just Joe

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #24 on: April 13, 2018, 07:21:51 AM »
Unnecessarily electric appliances like corkscrews and knives , they don't even save any time

I would add in any rechargeable device that a person doesn't use regularly. The batteries "age out" (won't charge) if left laying around too long.

littlebird

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #25 on: April 13, 2018, 07:31:18 AM »

Just curious if anyone can recommend a cooler that offers similar performance. I'm not going to buy a Yeti, but they are seriously impressive. My father-in-law has one, and it will keep ice for 3 days in the summer. Where as my coleman/no-name cheap coolers will barely last the day.

/thread-derail

RTIC makes pretty good coolers, supposedly comparable to Yeti for half the price. Also the Coleman Xtreme is cheap and moderately good. Not Yeti good, I'd say about 50% as good. So if the Yeti is getting 3 days, you might get 2. I own a Yeti (bought on sale) and a Coleman Xtreme because we used to go camping for a week at a time very far from civilization with no access to ice [facepunch me if you want but I have no regrets]. In my tests, I can go 7 days with the Yeti and 4 with the Coleman in the Pacific Northwest in the summer. A lot of it comes down to cooler management. Don't open and close it very often. Don't leave it in the sun or near the fire. Use block ice, not cubed. Freeze or cool everything before you put it in.
/even more derailed

Davnasty

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #26 on: April 13, 2018, 07:46:06 AM »
Unnecessarily electric appliances like corkscrews and knives , they don't even save any time

I have a particular annoyance with "fancy" corkscrews. Electrics are the worst but even some of the other clever designs that are bigger and more expensive than the waiter's friend don't save time or effort and more often seem to be more difficult to use.

Morning Glory

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #27 on: April 13, 2018, 07:48:20 AM »
Unnecessarily electric appliances like corkscrews and knives , they don't even save any time

I would add in any rechargeable device that a person doesn't use regularly. The batteries "age out" (won't charge) if left laying around too long.

Oh yes, especially things that aren't really necessary to be rechargeable like razors. I would much rather just plug something in to use it than having it plugged in all the time charging.

runbikerun

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #28 on: May 06, 2018, 02:44:09 AM »
Without a doubt, no product causes me more dismay than Yeti coolers. The concept of a "luxury" cooler is just mind-boggling.

Also up there would be ~$10,000 bicycles. Diminishing returns much? A pro would still wax your ass riding a thrift store huffy beach cruiser. (In fact that would be pretty damn fun to watch.)

Edit to add (regarding Yeti):

... and to the "oh, but they're BEAR PROOF" crowd. What about this one? Is this $200 cooler bear proof?

https://www.amazon.com/YETI-Hopper-Portable-Cooler-Tahoe/dp/B00SU9AHEC/ref=sr_1_4?s=sporting-goods&ie=UTF8&qid=1523380123&sr=1-4&keywords=yeti+cooler

In certain extremely specific situations, spending high four figures on a bike is understandable, even if not exactly justifiable. If someone is racing competitively, then the money spent does make a measurable difference. At the Ironman world championship, for example, the difference between winning the male 40-44 age group world title and failing to finish on the podium was marginally under four minutes: if the other racers in your category are on ten-thousand-dollar bikes, riding a three-thousand dollar bike may quite literally cost you that world title, all because your fairly fancy bike is a second and a half slower per kilometre.

For the bulk of the market, though, 10k bikes are overkill to a remarkable degree.

Cali

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scottish

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #30 on: May 06, 2018, 03:42:17 PM »
Here's my favourite.   In case the top of the line Ford pickup isn't boss enough for you:



It's the  Mega-Raptor!

https://www.roadandtrack.com/new-cars/a33397/this-custom-built-f-250-megaraptor-is-the-ultimate-ford-monster-truck/

LiveLean

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #31 on: May 06, 2018, 05:55:56 PM »
Without a doubt, no product causes me more dismay than Yeti coolers. The concept of a "luxury" cooler is just mind-boggling.

Also up there would be ~$10,000 bicycles. Diminishing returns much? A pro would still wax your ass riding a thrift store huffy beach cruiser. (In fact that would be pretty damn fun to watch.)

Edit to add (regarding Yeti):

... and to the "oh, but they're BEAR PROOF" crowd. What about this one? Is this $200 cooler bear proof?

https://www.amazon.com/YETI-Hopper-Portable-Cooler-Tahoe/dp/B00SU9AHEC/ref=sr_1_4?s=sporting-goods&ie=UTF8&qid=1523380123&sr=1-4&keywords=yeti+cooler

Amen. The YETI cups and thermoses are ridiculous. So is a freakin' coozie for that matter. I don't drink beer or soda anymore. But back when I did I never spent so long drinking a freakin' 12-ounce beverage that I had worry about it getting cold. Good grief.

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jinga nation

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #33 on: May 06, 2018, 08:42:19 PM »
deleted.
« Last Edit: May 07, 2018, 06:39:05 AM by jinga nation »

geekette

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #34 on: May 06, 2018, 09:02:26 PM »
That one belongs over on the "bargain" thread!

Just Joe

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #35 on: May 07, 2018, 11:54:51 AM »
Without a doubt, no product causes me more dismay than Yeti coolers. The concept of a "luxury" cooler is just mind-boggling.

Also up there would be ~$10,000 bicycles. Diminishing returns much? A pro would still wax your ass riding a thrift store huffy beach cruiser. (In fact that would be pretty damn fun to watch.)

Edit to add (regarding Yeti):

... and to the "oh, but they're BEAR PROOF" crowd. What about this one? Is this $200 cooler bear proof?

https://www.amazon.com/YETI-Hopper-Portable-Cooler-Tahoe/dp/B00SU9AHEC/ref=sr_1_4?s=sporting-goods&ie=UTF8&qid=1523380123&sr=1-4&keywords=yeti+cooler

Amen. The YETI cups and thermoses are ridiculous. So is a freakin' coozie for that matter. I don't drink beer or soda anymore. But back when I did I never spent so long drinking a freakin' 12-ounce beverage that I had worry about it getting cold. Good grief.

One of the ways to survive a hot summer here is to stay hydrated and drink cool/cold water. I received a gift: CamelBak Chute Vacuum-Insulated Stainless Water Bottle, 40oz, $25

It paid for itself in the first month b/c I was drinking so much cold water and not buying sodas from the vending machine. A little weight loss too.

Fill with ice cubes and water. Drink the water. Refill with water. Ice lasts maybe three refills and that's all day for me. I might drink 3 loads of water and then I start crunching the ice cubes. I have my own office so nobody is bothered...
« Last Edit: May 08, 2018, 12:04:40 PM by Just Joe »

slugline

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #36 on: May 07, 2018, 12:33:54 PM »
This was originally a Kickstarter that somehow made it all the way into real product status. Submitted for your consideration, the Trago water bottle. It's Bluetooth-connected and app-enabled so you can more effectively manage your hydration:

https://www.bestbuy.com/site/trago-20-oz-smart-water-bottle-black/5713533.p?skuId=5713533

partgypsy

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #37 on: May 07, 2018, 12:40:49 PM »
Or, you can save yourself time and trouble, and read the GOOP gift guides.

EDITED - this is the most ridiculous list:
https://goop.com/style/gift-guides/the-ridiculous-but-awesome-gift-guide-2/

Chocolate cutter: price upon request.
https://gentnerdesign.myshopify.com/products/chocolate-cutter?variant=10812171905
« Last Edit: May 07, 2018, 12:46:41 PM by partgypsy »

GhostSaver

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #38 on: May 07, 2018, 01:01:49 PM »

Just curious if anyone can recommend a cooler that offers similar performance. I'm not going to buy a Yeti, but they are seriously impressive. My father-in-law has one, and it will keep ice for 3 days in the summer. Where as my coleman/no-name cheap coolers will barely last the day.

/thread-derail

RTIC makes pretty good coolers, supposedly comparable to Yeti for half the price. Also the Coleman Xtreme is cheap and moderately good. Not Yeti good, I'd say about 50% as good. So if the Yeti is getting 3 days, you might get 2. I own a Yeti (bought on sale) and a Coleman Xtreme because we used to go camping for a week at a time very far from civilization with no access to ice [facepunch me if you want but I have no regrets]. In my tests, I can go 7 days with the Yeti and 4 with the Coleman in the Pacific Northwest in the summer. A lot of it comes down to cooler management. Don't open and close it very often. Don't leave it in the sun or near the fire. Use block ice, not cubed. Freeze or cool everything before you put it in.
/even more derailed

To add to the derailment: WalMart markets a Yeti knockoff under their Ozark Trail brand, though I am reluctant to support the odious Walton family. My shitty non-roto molded Coleman still has ice in it from Saturday, though. I'll upgrade it when the moving parts wear out and it falls apart.

LennStar

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #39 on: May 07, 2018, 01:28:53 PM »
Artisanal pencil sharpening.

http://www.artisanalpencilsharpening.com

For $500, he will sharpen your pencil. And PROVIDE the PENCIL!
I actually like that one. But then, I am one of those mad peoples who writes novels (admittedly on a computer, but maybe he also sharpens keyboards?)

ohsnap

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #40 on: May 07, 2018, 03:08:49 PM »
Who wouldn't want a nice scented candle for $470? 

https://www.jomalone.com/product/3561/46944/for-the-home/luxury-candles/wild-fig-cassis-luxury-candle

But you get a pack of complimentary matches with it.

And it's a HUGE candle - totally worth $470.  Burns for 220 hours!  :D

robartsd

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #41 on: May 07, 2018, 03:27:29 PM »
Here's another one, this one I laughed not just about the cost of the expensive watch, but the bottom section that reads "Customers who viewed this item also bought". FREE SHIPPING AS WELL!!
 
Rolex Men's 18K Gold Rolex Yachtmaster II Model # 116688
3.7 out of 5 stars    103 customer reviews 
Price:   $36,496.90 & FREE Shipping

https://www.amazon.com/Mens-Rolex-Yachtmaster-Model-116688/dp/B004GYXO9U/ref=pd_sbs_watch_2?ie=UTF8&refRID=1AJYM80Y2XPKF3BM7ZQ5

For some more laughs, read the 1 Star comment section!
Some 5 star review gems:
Quote
Much like the golden idols found in Egypt after thousands of years, this golden idol will signal to future generations that I had a bunch of money once, and I knew what to do with it.
Quote
Got mine in the mail a few weeks ago. All is well except for one tiny thing. I didn't read the manual. I pushed the "generate yacht" button in my studio apartment. The yacht materialized and killed my Chinese neighbor. My land lord was fused to the hull and he isn't real happy about it. I called yachts r us and they want 4.6 million dollars to extract my yacht from the building it is stuck in and tow it to the Caspian Sea.


solon

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #42 on: May 07, 2018, 03:28:27 PM »

Just curious if anyone can recommend a cooler that offers similar performance. I'm not going to buy a Yeti, but they are seriously impressive. My father-in-law has one, and it will keep ice for 3 days in the summer. Where as my coleman/no-name cheap coolers will barely last the day.

/thread-derail

RTIC makes pretty good coolers, supposedly comparable to Yeti for half the price. Also the Coleman Xtreme is cheap and moderately good. Not Yeti good, I'd say about 50% as good. So if the Yeti is getting 3 days, you might get 2. I own a Yeti (bought on sale) and a Coleman Xtreme because we used to go camping for a week at a time very far from civilization with no access to ice [facepunch me if you want but I have no regrets]. In my tests, I can go 7 days with the Yeti and 4 with the Coleman in the Pacific Northwest in the summer. A lot of it comes down to cooler management. Don't open and close it very often. Don't leave it in the sun or near the fire. Use block ice, not cubed. Freeze or cool everything before you put it in.
/even more derailed

To add to the derailment: WalMart markets a Yeti knockoff under their Ozark Trail brand, though I am reluctant to support the odious Walton family. My shitty non-roto molded Coleman still has ice in it from Saturday, though. I'll upgrade it when the moving parts wear out and it falls apart.

Would you consider doing it to support your fellow mustachians? Most of us own Walmart stock through our index funds.

BDWW

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #43 on: May 07, 2018, 03:31:48 PM »
Back on topic...

https://www.apple.com/iphone-x/

People pay ridiculous amounts for these things that don't really do anything you can't do on a $150 one off amazon. And the cheaper one probably even has a headphone jack.

JAYSLOL

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #44 on: May 08, 2018, 02:24:16 AM »
Have you heard of VI Poo? It's a deodorant that you spray in the toilet to make your shit not stink. The ads hilarious, I thought it was a prank at first.


Lots of everyday things too:
air freshener: why not just clean up the mess instead of covering up the smell with chemicals?

Trash bags: just use grocery bags, the trash won't get as stinky if it is taken out more often, and you aren't buying something just to throw it away

Paper plates: my mom uses these, I don't get it

"Collectibles " of any sort if bought new, it's just a marketing gimmick

Super size fast food meals, unless you are sharing with a friend

SUVs in most circumstances

Already cut up fruit and veg

Leaf blowers

Unnecessarily electric appliances like corkscrews and knives , they don't even save any time

I agree with this entire list except leaf blowers.  Ever try raking small wet leaves off a paved driveway, or raking leaves out of a rock bed without disturbing the rock?  Leaf blowers are the correct tool for some applications.  For a home owner with just a lawn with some leaves on it, nope, total waste of money.  A rake and a lawnmower are all that's needed.  For a Landscaper that has to clear large areas of paved driveway, get leaves off rock gardens, clear grass trimmings off of long sidewalks etc it's a valuable tool. 

a1pharm

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #45 on: May 08, 2018, 07:14:27 AM »
Back on topic...

https://www.apple.com/iphone-x/

People pay ridiculous amounts for these things that don't really do anything you can't do on a $150 one off amazon. And the cheaper one probably even has a headphone jack.

+1

Cromacster

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #46 on: May 08, 2018, 07:28:52 AM »
Yeti's is a tough one.  For the hardcore adventurers they are pretty solid.  If you are out in the bush for 5+ days and that's your only method to keep some items fresh, it really is the best.  I suppose the truly hardcore would just be eating freeze dried goods and drinking ambient temp water.  But it's more become a status symbol because it's definitely not necessary if it's only used to keep a case of beer cold on your Saturday boat cruise.

I do like the mugs and tumblers.  I think my household is up to 6 or 7 of them.  We've only bought one, but it seems to be to the hot item for corporate giveaways right now.

The really unmustachian part is the butthurt NRA people blowing them up, but it does provide for some good youtube entertainment.

bluebelle

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #47 on: May 08, 2018, 07:32:22 AM »
Without a doubt, no product causes me more dismay than Yeti coolers. The concept of a "luxury" cooler is just mind-boggling.

Also up there would be ~$10,000 bicycles. Diminishing returns much? A pro would still wax your ass riding a thrift store huffy beach cruiser. (In fact that would be pretty damn fun to watch.)

Edit to add (regarding Yeti):

... and to the "oh, but they're BEAR PROOF" crowd. What about this one? Is this $200 cooler bear proof?

https://www.amazon.com/YETI-Hopper-Portable-Cooler-Tahoe/dp/B00SU9AHEC/ref=sr_1_4?s=sporting-goods&ie=UTF8&qid=1523380123&sr=1-4&keywords=yeti+cooler

Amen. The YETI cups and thermoses are ridiculous. So is a freakin' coozie for that matter. I don't drink beer or soda anymore. But back when I did I never spent so long drinking a freakin' 12-ounce beverage that I had worry about it getting cold. Good grief.
this....we were given two Yeti cups for xmas.....and yes, they keep things hot or cold for 12+ hours...but I don't need anything kept cold or hot for that long.   And since I have no intention of back woods camping, I don't need a cooler than keeps stuff cold for a week.  I need a cooler than keeps things cold for 6 hours.....although, living in Toronto, maybe I need it, since frickin' Toronto Hydro can't keep the f'ing lights on. 

BTDretire

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #48 on: May 08, 2018, 12:11:08 PM »
this....we were given two Yeti cups for xmas.....and yes, they keep things hot or cold for 12+ hours...but I don't need anything kept cold or hot for that long.   And since I have no intention of back woods camping, I don't need a cooler than keeps stuff cold for a week.  I need a cooler than keeps things cold for 6 hours.....although, living in Toronto, maybe I need it, since frickin' Toronto Hydro can't keep the f'ing lights on.
[/quote it .
 
  I have a yeti cup, it's not mine, a customer left it behind. They called later that day, they will be back in town in about six months, wanted us to hold it until they get back into town. Yep, I'm still storing their stupid Yeti cup.

bernardnb

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Re: Antimustachian PRODUCTS of Shame and Comedy
« Reply #49 on: May 08, 2018, 01:20:39 PM »
An oldie but a goodie:

Oreo Dunking Spoon

From this thread that covers similar items

Haha, why buy one for $7.73 when you can get the 2-pack for.....$28.99!?!